Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1856-06-04
EVENING STAR,
How Deacon F. interfered in Soils Family
by JoNA. FITZHUGH


Sol was an honest, clever man In all his
intercourse with his friends and neighbors he
would do what he conceived to be right and
honest Unfortunately, however, he was not
gifted with the mental power in an extraor-
| binary manner. Sol was a member Of the
Methodist Church, and in his neighborhOod
there was a small schoOl-house in which the
Methodists held their different kinds of meet
| ings, as class meetings, prayer-meetings, &c.
Over the class Of the members in that neigh
borhoOd was placed a man who was kind of
religious tyrant, who would enforce with a
Shylock strictness the rules OF his church
According to Soils account of the matter he
held meetings three times a week and if the
members failed to attend each meeting be
would arraign them. and solemnly threaten
| to exfoliate them. He endeavored, by this
| means, to keep his flock together. But we
| will now let Sol tell in his own way, how the
Deaeon's strict rules operated on him and
| family:
"While we had meetings once a week."
said Sol, {" was happy, and Sally she was
happy, and my children they was happy and
[ loved Sally, and Sally loved me. But then
Deacon F., he must have meetin' three times
week: told him it was too often; he said
| 1t wasn't, and that [ should come, and my
wife and daughter they should come. So he
| interfered in my family. and told them they
| must come whether / wanted them or not !;
they went. Now it was too bad for a poor
| man like me to 60 to meetin' three times a
week. When We had meetin's once a week
my leather cost me three dollars a year, but
when 1t was three times a week il cost me four
dollars forty-seven cents and one-fourth' For
my family wore out their shoes runnin' to
| meetin'. A poor man can't stand it. It's
not right for man to interfere in another s
family. 1t used to be they would de what L
wanted them, but now they won't listen to
me.
'sAnd the other day when 1 came home,
don't you believe Sally turned her back to
me and wouldn't notice me! Oh it nearly
killed me, for l loved Sally. Now, when a
stranger comes, and Sally cooks meat for sup
per, nay children, from the littIest to the big
gest, will just pick up their forks and sock
them right into piece OF meat; and before
the Deacon intertered in my family, they'd
| eat their mush and milk and 60 to bed And
in the mornin', when Sally cooks biscuit
they'll the first thing, snatch a biscuit in
| stead Of eatin' corn-bread as they use to do
And now I'm about out of wheat, when, in
the fall L counted up and had plenty for
breakfast the year round and this is all
cause he interfered III my family. Now,
wasn't that enough TO make anybody lose his
religion? And that's not all.
1.-THE other mornin' L catched a turkey, and
was gOin' to bring it to town to buy some
coffee, and don't you believe Sally screamed
out, Put down that turkey; you'll have
everything on the place destroyed . In course,
/ drapped it like hot tater, cause loved
Sally. Wha. was I to do for coffee? Well,
l put the bride on old Rosum, and got a
bushel of corn to come TO town with; and Sally
come out and saw Rosum and the corn, and
holIored, What you goin' to do! I told her
softly as L could, that was goin' TO town 10
get some coffee, and don't you think Sally
made me hitch up Rosum, and said she was
goin' herself, so she was And hitched up
Rosum, cause l loved Sally. But thought
I'd kinder check her, so pulls off my pants
and hands EN- to Sally, and told her she had
better wear them. And my stars. if Sally
didn't take 'em and put 'em on,
"Now what was / to do? Them was my
over alls, under rails and malls. Well, Sally
brought me an old, slim red striped Iinsey
dress-cuss the old thing-I can just see her
now shakin' it at me L had to put it on
And L hadn't NOR n got it on, till l sees a
neighbor comm. What must do, thinks
to myself. run and jumpted into bed, and
begun to groan awful. lie comes and says,
not WELL Mylittle imps of childer was settin'
round sniggerin and laughin', and presently
Bill say, Mans coat makes dad grOan pow
erfuln jumped up-and who would mt .
to whip Bill, before L thought. Neighbor
jumped up and stared at me, and no wonder,
cause my coat hung night down, and didn't
touch the floor by foot and a half. was a
sight, l tell you. And this was all cause he
interfered in my family. Well, neighbor kin
der compromised tween me and Sally, and
got my pants, but guess slept with them
on for the next six months
"Well Sally come on to town and got the
coffee, and what do you think she told the
storekeeper? Why, not to credit me,
come to town after few days, and wanted to
buy some goods, and the storekeepers said
they reckoned L was broke, as my wife told
EN- not to credit me. ThunderatiOn, couldn't
L a squashed her. 1 could'dt stand it any
longer, cut for a forrin country-and this
was all cause he interfered in my family.
But L guess L had mt been gone long fore Sally
writ to me, and said she loved me harder than
ever she did. So 1 come home, and Sally did
love me as she use to did, and 1 love Sally,
and the childer they loved me and / loved
them, and they eat their mush and corn bread
aud don't wear out but three dollars worth
Of leather a year-and this is all cause
there's no meetin' three times a week, and
nobody interferes in my family .''-Spirit Of
the Times.