The Placer herald., 1856-12-13

then the telegraph said that Fremont would
not have more than five thousand majority
thought that this report must be wrong
went to the Times office, same news there;
walked up to the Tribune shop, ditto; circu-
lated down to the Herald Office, same kind of
news there only worse, and a mighty sight
more of it--trembled for a moment, then
thought of "the Mountains" with gee, and
the ''back counties" with joyful hope.
News kept coming, same kind-got little
red,-found the fellows | had bet with,
and tried to convince them that had meant
a su t of summer clothes, a straw hat, and
cowhide boots. Brown pulled down the
corner of his eye and said, "No you don't"
Cruel Brown!
Then another county came in and made
the twenty thousand majority sure failure,
and so lost my hat for me, and | began to
fear that should have to relapse into my
old clothes. Then another county came in
and took the coat from my back then anoth-
er, and stripped me of my pantaoons; then
another yet, and despoied me Of one of my
six new shirts. And the last despatch of
the night robbed me OF my velvet vest and
my only decent cravat Went to bed sorrow
ful-took look at my old suit and mourn
ed at the fractured integrity thereof Pom
dered over the rips under the arms, retlec-
ted how to mend the holes in the elbows,
doubted the pausibility of darnng the knees
and went to bed wondering where | should
get money to buy patches
Dsconsolate | wandered down street next
morning, and read on the bulletin that Penn
sylvania had gone for Fremont after all
| horrnwaI a and |
shouted for joy, for though | had lost my
hat and coat, had saved my shirt and pan
falcons
Papers all said we had got Pennsylvania
sure-met crazy Buchanan man who
wanted to bet that the Key Stone State had
gone for old Buck-thought crazy man hadn't
heard the news, and looked upon him as
special interposition of fortune in my behalf
he was a speculation, and he was not to be
made the most of dared trust him
out Of my sight lest some one else should get
hold of him and win his money before got
my share. Stuck close to him and coaXed
him into tie back room of larger beer shop
got him to bet on PENNSYLVANIA; he had
more money than had, but he was willing
to put it all up if | would find means to COW
er it-agreed to raise the balance If it took
a LEG, and deposteit it with Jones before three
o'clock.
Left crazy Buchanan man and went out
to borrow the money; found Damphool Dam
phool hadn't got the cash, but, when ! show
ed him what a sure thing we had on crazy
Buchanan man, he said he'd get it, and he
wanted me to let him 90 halves, but appeal
ed strongly to his friendship and he finally
agreed to let me keep all the profits, and he
would lend me the money out Of pure love-
waited impatiently for him to raise the
funds and make his appearance. One
o'clock came and no Damphool and no mon
ey; began to be uneasy lest shouldn't have
the funds to put into Jones hands and should
therefore lose the chance-half past one, and
no Damphool; felt much excited and wished
| was behind Damphool with sharp stick.
Two o'clock and d still invisible; was in an
agony, and feared that Buchanan man would
escape his fate-halfpast two, no Damphoo;
felt despairibg and desperate, but at ten MN
utes to three Damphool made his appearance
on the horizon just as | was meditatng
cheap suicide, for | really hadn't money
enough to buy rope, dose Of poison or a
charge of powder But d. came at last; he
Ildtu SOlu HIS oIclN Doh, jd"Hc hIo ''''N',
and agreed to pay five per cent, month but
he had got the cash.
hurried to Jones and got it safely into
his hands at two minutes before three; then
| went out and danced an ecstatic hornpipe
on the sidewalk After | had ctfervesced a
little, | stepped around and told my boot
man that Td have some money ito morrow"
and pay his little blI--then sent word to
Stages that I'd pay my note"to-morrow," and
he needn't sue; and also to Snufkins that he
might stop his proceedings in court, for !
should be in funds "to-morrow, dropped
in and bulied my tailor for having dared to
dun me for bill only four months over due
zone day AFTER" and told him to send his boy
round "to~morrow." | left this deuded man
with the idea that had just fallen heir to
large fortune.
Night came, and with it the official return
to my surprise they didn't look exactly
right and were against me-hurried to the
telegraph office, same story here-thought
somebody had lied to the lightning and was
going to whip the operator. Found that the
dire Intelligence however was too true-cra-
w Buchanan man had heard the news--ln
fact learned that crazy Buchanan man and
two or three other Buchanan men, equally
crazy, had invented the Republican majority
70 the morning, hired the telegraph man to
send them on from Philadelphia and had
then made heavy bets with the jubiant FIRE.
monters.
Rushed instantly to Jones to draw out
Damphool's money, but Jones had paid 1t
over to crazy Buchanan man who was Just
disappearing in the distance-rushed after
him and got to the depot just in time to see
him jump into the last train for Boston
assumed classic position on the platform
and put his thumb on his nose.
; had been sold, my friend had lost his
u,onar anl naust andarsa the five ner cent. q