Nashville union and American. [volume] (Nashville, Tenn.) 1853-1862, 1856-11-05

the neighborhood were in attendance. Every
thing was there, every thing was apt readiness:
@The royal tiger present thar,
+ -a The monkey and the polar bar! y
But that dignitary TO whom it was designed to
assign the honor of master OF the marriage cere-
mony, had not yet arrived; but just then s)me
one spoke and said
3Thar comes Squire Ben Buncum."
Quick the lights were trimmed and everything
put IN place. As usual, anxiety, agitation and Joy
were depicted on every face, and Mr.. Tom Wis
dom. the honorable host, walked out to meet the
anxious "Squar," to welcome him in, inquire for
his health, the news, etc.
The Squire was good humored gentleman, but
be was chiefly celebrated for talents, astuteness,
learning ETC., in bis populous township.
"Well," said the host ben, you have been
elected, but you had close time of it; my vote
alone saved you you beat him oae vote only"
"That il all, Tom" replied Squire Ben, shut
the next election I'll lick him. There is no use in
talking, Mr.. Wisdom, without using the juice of
the corn freely, and little sly scandal and lying"
"Ah, well, that's all over, and you are the mag
istrste, Squar Ben, so and let's go in and see
what the young folks wisn Indeed, Squsr Ben,
are you aware that you are expected 10 say the
ceremony"
| Benjamin Buncum now began to see the awful
respous bilty of his Office, and to "trembe fom
centre to circumference" for he had never off,
/ CdL6U III ludb luIStCoIinS CdpoCbJ IuOJ nOI
done him the justice to inform him of the part he
| was expected TO perform, or he could have pre-
| pared. He had made no preparaton--hsd no
| form nor could any book be found, high or low,
| having the marriage ceremony in it. Hence to
| take it "off hand" wGs the only chance An IN.
| fortunate and excruciating test for the newly
elected Squire.
The company was now arranged into crescent.
The Squire at bis place, and in the parties
ic apd appanda-thA Oalianta each helr.
| ing candle, which evinced the extent and luxu-
| RANT range in that neighborhoOd. With much
assurance and dignity, the Squire looked around,
and whole ages of learning seemed rushing through
| his mind He thought over everything he had
| dresmed, but oil in vain There was a suppressed
litter all over the house. This admonshed him. he
must say something, and, in an agony of despair,
| hebegan-
,"The State of Missouri, county, command
| you TO-"
This did not suit Confusion and whis pering
| perplaxed him the more.
@Give him chance give the Squsr chance, "
| said strong voice from the door. The Squire
| made another effort:
"Be it enacted by the General Assembly of the
| State of Missouri"
b The Squire was again admonished, by titterug,
| that he must proceed with something. In agon
| ling desperation ne began:
| "Wheu in the course of human events it be-
comes----"
Here he was touched by Mr.. Wisdom. After
pause he began again:
| " Our Father who art in hPaven---"
| "Hes repeating the Lords prayer" says one.
The Squire raised his hopeless vision to the ceiling
| for slurt me and began anew:
| T" Know all l-c1 tr taese presents"
Here he was interrupted by general noise, and
| a ole l. on tat ca wd, lie is writing deed.
Again he es3syed:
.sWtness my nard and seal, this the"
g Has .'nclu ed it; he will certainly go on with
| the ceremony, said several voices.
In the name of God, Amen" he again began.
| Laughter from every directions; some swearing.
"He is making bis will, said one. II thought
he would not i've long; be looks prodigioualy
| sad"
The next essay of the noble and learned "5quar"
was:
"Oh, yes oh, yes! come into court, and"
care we to have court tonight" calculated
some one.
sob, yes come into court |" replied another,
from the door. The laughter was general
1t may be supposed the bride and her partner
were somewhat hOrs de combat, especially the
former but water and suitable sromatcs were
near and Squire Buacum YVES her friend and
near by. He was an untiring man; and, after
casting his eyes around the room, he determined
to try again:
$40 the constable or any other legal cfloer,
greeting"
{" Let's go. He's going to have US all arrested, "
said several
Here CLEAN of light flashed over the Squire
bewildered and forlorn couutenance. He ordered
the parties positively TO hold up their right hands,
and in solemn voice be said
"You and each of you, do solemnly and truly
swear, in the present company, and OF the Pres
sdent of the United States, and in the name ofthe
Constitution of the United States of America that
you will perform faithfully, the duties and func
tons of husband aud VITA -svtlisy; so help you |
tI>>-b amen,
"Good as old rye Old Kentucky forever |" |
exclaimed the grateful Mr.. Tom Wisdom. "Cone,
gentlemen" said he, 1--WE will all drink with Squsr
Buncum."
"AgreedP ~ shouted the enthusiastic and happy
crowd.