Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1856-08-29

| Punch gives the London Life Assurance Compan-
les dab on the number of useless iniques that
made of applicants for policies
Punch says he has no objection to the most scru-
tInlzlng inquiries being made before a policy is
granted, on the contrary the more minute the inves
tigation the better. And since the twenty-five or
thirty questions by which is sought to discover the
physiology of yourself and that of your father
mother, grand parents uncles, auns, cousins, bro
theirs and sisters is insufficient, he begs to frame
few more, conceived in the same spirit which he
would add TO the "partlculars requred.n Only he
would insist, that whenever everything has been
asked and everything tested the record and the bar
gain if made, should be irrevocabe For instance
81. Did your great grandmother ever complain of
having been frightened TO death
32 Are you in the habit of reading Mr. Alhson's
Histories, or the Morning Advertiser. or any other
publication tending to strengthen life I?
33 Do you cross the street carefully and have
you ever been over by Pickford's vans, and how
often
"a. Have you an admission to the Geological Gar
dens if so, do you habtualy go close to the dens of
;he carniuora, get into the serpent's cages
35 Is your wife strong minded woman.
&c. Do you know any Americans, and is there any
chance of your getting into political or other argu-
ments with the owner OF revolver.
81 Are you polite man, who does not mind run
ming out of hot Opera House to get up carriage
on wet night ?
49, Did you ever sit out an EIizabehan Drama of
modern construction, and how many years ago, and
who attended you medically, afterwards =?
80. Did you after fancy preachers, and do
they make you cry.
40. What was the general state of your ancestors
health in the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries +?
! Al. Was any member of your family ever swal-
lowed up by earthquake
! AZ. When you 60 to Gravessend is it by boat or
rail; and, in the former case, do you always hold
fast by rope?
43. Do you always take not to tread on orange
peal in the street
A. Have you ever been afflicted with Irishmen, or
any other epidemic
As. Who cuts your hair?
Now let the officer add these, and any number of
similar questions, to their string of inquiries And
let them examine your friends on OATH and YOUR
doctor as the Americans cross-examine nigeer wit
ness namely, by putting him in a corner, and kick
! ing his shns until he answers catagoricallv And
let them have half dozen boards or even one medi
cal officer whose head is not made of board and let
the very utmost be done to obtain information But
as aforesaid, a bargain should be bargain-not of
course, that one rogue may make a price, but that
ninety nine honest men who save-perhaps screw
through years of weary toll. to secure homes for the
loved when their natural protector shall be at
cherished work has been carelessly cumsily done
and whether a corporation-" that which has neither
a body 10 be kicked nor a soul to be "-otherwise
disposed of-may not take advantage of its own
bunders.
Mr.. Punch is Justly proud of his patent-leather
boots. but were he a juryman on trial where an Of
ice disputed policy, he would eat those boots before
giving the defendants verdict.