davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16
M[istfIlal1eQus 2ta0n1g
MR., BROWNS. MISHiPS.

Mr.. Eliphalet Brown was bachelor oi
thirty.fve, or thereabout; one Of those men
who seem born to pass through The world
alone Save this peculiarly, there was
nothing to distinguish Mr. Brown from the
multitude of other Browns who are born,
grow up, and die in this world Of ours.
1t chauced that Brown had occasion to
visit a town some fifty miles distant, on mat
ters of business. 1t was his firstvist to the
place, and he proposed stopping for day,
in order to give himself an opportunity to
look about.
Walking leisufely through the street, ne
was all at once accosted by child OF five,
who ran to him, cxcaiming:
Father, want you to buy me some
candy
Father" Was it possible that he, q
bachelor, was addressed by that title!--He
could not believe it! 49,.
"Who were you speaking to, my dear e
he inquired Of the little girl.
al spoke 10 you, father" said the little
one, surprised.
"Really," thought Mr.. Eliphalet Brown,
{" this is embarrassing"
"I am not your father, my DEAR" he es-
saved. "What is your name? ?"
The child laughing heartily, evidently
thinking it a good joke. what funny
father you are" said she, but you are going
to buy me some candy!"
: "Yes, yes, iii buy you pound if you
won't call me father any more" said MIR.
Brown, nervously.
The little gill clapped her hands with de-
light. The promise was all she remembered.
MIR. Brown proceeded to confectionery
store, ard actually bought pound of candy,
which he placed in the hands of the little
girl.
In coming out of the store, they encoun.
tered the childs mother.
90 mother" said the little girl, "jest see
how much candy father has bought me-
"You shouldn't have bought her so much
at time, Mr.. Jones" said the lady, /" am
afraid she will make herself sick. But how
did you happen to get home SO quick? did
not expect you till night"
Jones--I--madam said the embear.
rasssed Mr.. Brown, it's all mistake;
amt Jones at ALL 1t isn't my name. air
Eliphalet Brown, of W, and this is the
first time ever came to this city"
GOOD heavens! Mr.. Jones, what has
put this silly tale into your hcad9 You have
concluded to change your name, have you
Perhaps it is also your intention TO change
your wifes"
Mrs. jones' tone was defiant, and thi!
tended TO increase Mr.. Browns embarrass
ment. But he must not leave matters ii
this position.
"i haven't any wife, madam; lnever hac
any. On my word as gentleman, never
was married"
"And do you intend TO palm this tale of
upon mew said Mrs. Jones, with excitement
&c, If you're not married, I'd like to know
{: who | am!"
81 have no doubt you are most respec
table lady" said Mr.. Brown, "andl conjec
ture from what you have said, that you
name is Jones; but mine is Brown, madam
and always was"
"Melinda," said her mother, suddenly
taking the child by the arm, and leading he
up to Mr.. Brown, Melinda, who is thi
gentleman Z" -
!" Why that's. father l"swas the childs i'm
!. mediate reply, as she confdingly placed he
= hand inr his ~ (. ? ~
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16
Gkoiite 4okttg.
PAY THE PRINTER.

AS honest men, attend and hear
The serious fact-the times are dear;
Who owes bill, tits just rs clear
AS light in the winter,
That he should come without delay
That's if he can-that bill to pay,
And ere he puts his purse away,
"Fork over" to the Printer.
The Printers check is seldom red,
The fine machinery of his head
Is working when you are in bed,
Your true and faithful Mentor;"
All day and night he wears his shoes,
And brains to furnish you with news;
But men of conscience meier refuse,
To pay the toil;ng Printer.
'Tis known, or ought to be, by all
His dues are scattered, and they're small,
And if not paid, he's bound to fall
In debtor fuel, bread, rent, or
Perhaps his paper; then to square
Up with his hclp-a double care
Bows down his hcad-now, is it fair
That you don't pay the Printer?
His wife and little prattlers too,
Are now depending upon you;
And if you pay the score that's due,
Neoessitv can't stint her:
But if you don't. as gnaws the mole,
Twill thro' your conscience eat Il hole !!
And brand the forehead thus: " No soul :"
OF him who cheats a printer.
The cats will NEW between your feet,
The dogs will bite you on the street;
And every urchin that you meet,
Will roar with voice of Stcntor,
" Look to your pockets-therc he goes
The chap that wears the Printers clothes.
And proud, though everybody knows
The grub, he knaw'd the Printer"
Be simply just, and don't digrace
Yourself, bu, beg the Lord of grace"
To thaw that harden'd icy "casc,"
That honesty may enter; :
This done, man will with man act fair,
And all will have the tin" to spare
Then will the Editorial Chair"
Support wsll-Paid Printer.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16

RESISTANCE TO R1DrcuLE.-Learn' from:
the earliest days to inure your; principles
against the peril of ridicule ! you, car. no
more exercise your reason, if you live in the
constant dread Of laughter, tban4y yousean.
enjoy your life if you are in the constant
terror of death. IL you think i rightsto
differ from the times, and TO; make APPOINT
of morals, do it.. however rustic, however
antiquated, however pedantic il may appsas;;
do it, not for insolence butt seriously sad
grandly-as a man who wore . sopl Of s6issI
own 10 his bosom, and did not +wnitedll il
was breathed into him by the breashs6 d,
fashion.-Sydney Smith, ;ss = Is+s
i G"MY wife, says ascritic, ais sthe
most even tempered Womaiiin the world; !;
sheis always mad = q = = is ~ %
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16

A Western poet gets off the following
" explosion y -. - TX !.
The engine groaned,z :, >, 4 .sstssss..
The wheels did .creak, -,.s-r-.sa
The steam did whistle 80: - ~
And the boilers did leak. s,:.-s7-s
The boiler was examined.
They found it rusted; ~ ~
When all on a sudden ~: -
The old thing busted. sea
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16

Monday Morning, May 26, 1856.

+The reader will perceive that the author, in
his observations in the text, is considering the
subject of slave representation from two differ
ent points Of view In the State, by whose laws,
alone slaves are made slaues, or property he is
combating the noli"n that-under any mere ab-
straction they should be regarded as any thing else
than property, or allowed to be represented as per-
sons. On the other hand. in the federal gouern-
ment, he insists that The States holding this valua-
JIe property, had right to spulate with view to
its security for its full representation as population
and were bound, in self defence, to contend as they
did (but with only partial suceessO for it. What
right had, or has, the federal government to regard
the population or property. within the BODY OF
dction otherwise than as the State, hersef-looking
to her internal poty and external relations-views
them9 See Luther Martins '' Genuine Int0rma-
tionn
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16

A teacher had been explaining to his class
the points of the compass, and all were
drawn up in front towards the North.
"Now what is before you, John Z"
"The North sir"
"And what is behind you, Tommy|
"My coat tail, sir," said he, trying at the
same time to get glimpse.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16

BREAD AND SrEAK.-An elderly fat gen.
tlemau, in discussing warm beef steak at
an inn, called to the waiting boy, Donald
bring me more bread, for | eat great deal
of bread to my steak" Donald answered,
with much simplicity, "Ay, and please
your honor, and ye eat great deal OF steak
to your bread"
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16

"BLEss my soul, Sambo, how black you
are; how in the name of wonder did you
get so mournful 2" said gentleman stopping
at one of our hotels to one Of its walters,
as he met him on the straits.
Sambo grinned.
"Why, look ahere, massa, de reason am
ds-de day dis child was born, dere was
an eclipse"
Ebony received a quarter for his satisfac.
tory explanation, and after grinning thanks,
continued:
81 tell you what it is, massa, dis niger
may be brack, but be aint green, no how.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1856-07-16

DuTcn.-The other day two Dutchmen
were overheard discussing knotty ques.
ton. Said Hans:
"Yacob, vat de Yankees mean, when he
saw about der mommemter, and de zeerow9"
"Vat," said Jacob, "you not verstan dats"
"No, vat he mean" 2"
"Vy," said Jacob, "it mean twenty
hintches below can't get no colder~
"Yaw."
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25

CoyINerOs, Ky. Dec. ls, To

CovIEGToE, hy.,Dee. iS' iooo'
Ms,srs. TRrPP & Mccoy. Editors Carroll
Ees Press am Just in receipt Of the number
Of the Free Press, Of November 9th. contsin-
ing lis, Of premiums awarded BY the award
ipg COMMITTEES Of the late Carroll county Fair.
aud am quite surprised to see diploma a.
wardsd to Messrs English, Goodrich d Dixon
for best corn and cob mill. Their mill being
the Excelcior Young AmerIsa) over the Little
Giant, manufactured by Messrs. Scott d He'd
res. Of Cincinnati, for which mill am the
controlling agent for The counties of Carroll
STARK. Columbiana, Tusearawas and Mabon-
mo Lest some of the stock feeders Of the a.
hove named counties should be misguided by
seeing a,aiploma awarded unto the PrcPrie'Ors
Of the Excelsior Young America, ! deem II
pruLsnt to address this note to you, which you
will please give place in your paper That
lths stock feeders Of the above named counties
NAV have the means Of forming correct opln
lions as regards the relative merits of the con
tending mills. Ipropose meeting the Excelsi
or Young America on the same ground, ant
r. there having the mills fairly tested by tu'nin
Al each mill certain number of revolutions, tn
,e mills TO be adjudged by disintere't'd men, fc
y their speed Of grinding, fneue's Of meal an
economy Of power further propose shOul
n, n, /. meat the appreciation of the friends Of th
Excelsior young America, to have both cSE
Sc Sc tending mills put up as forfeit to be taken
d. the one that proves to be the superior mill
s. the above particulars, Should the friends
1f. the Excelsior Young America accept @y pro-
osition. they will please notify me through u
Free Press, or drop me nots to CoVing'o'
- Kentucky, and will be happy to meet The
:, at whatever time we may agree on puSin
- this note with all due respect to the friends
the Excelsior Young America My only o
,o ieot being to place the cOntsndug mills on th'
=. true merits. Very respectfully,
:. FRANCIS WESTON
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25
From the adams County Democrat.
riandigh Outrage.

8 ARREST or THE PERPETRATORS.
Els Incarceration in the County JAIL Capture
hersfrons and Execution according TO The Lynch
Code.
Since our last, our county has been the scene
ef crime as fsndish and brutal as human rec+
ord can present, accompanied with punish
ment as sudden and terribIs-such punishment
as for the last few years, is paralleled only in
California and Kansas. The particulars OF this
horrible affair. according to our Information -
the premises, are as follows ~
On Friday night. 2lst instant, the house OF
MFR. Israel Morris in Manchester, in this conn-
". was forced by breaking open an OUTSIDE
window, the house entered, aHd the person q
Mrs. NJ. (who was alone in The house with t''o
infant children, violated in the most brutal
and horrible manner. Shortly before daylight
on Saturday. gqd, the ueighbors we're sroussd
by shrieks and sounds of distress and danger IN
Morris's house. AS soon as possible, numbers
rusbsd in and found the little children in per-
feet terror Of fright. Mrs. NJ. speschless : her
;a,g dislocated and hanging down--terror and an
guish depicted in every linement of her coun-
teuance. Death itself could not present more
frightrul and distressed looking object than sh e
WAS As VIC are informed by those were who wit
n.s.ss Of the terril 10 and melancholy spectacle,
Her husband was, al the time, absent from
home on the river
The town was speedily aroused, aGd The peo-
pie gathsrsa 10 and around the house by hun
dreds. Mrs. Msjaw was soon set BY the ply
scians of the place, when she told hOrriiyinG
ltale. The partculars are too revolving for pub
location. Suffice it to say, her person va
most grossly abused her throat was black
and her shoulders bore marks Ofvolencs, an'
hurts aud bruises were all over her person, =
She stated that she was aroused from sleep b.
) a pressure upon the face (evidsntly the han
of the miscreant, intended toprevent her frOn
I. screaming and arOusing the neighbor'.) sh
resisted 10 the utmost ofher power, consequent
" the great injuries to her person. We hav
no disposition nor are we sufficiently aPpriss
of the particulars of her story to pursue tn
horrible reeital. She informed the spectator
: that in her struggles she had scratched or tor
the lip of6er asaaaltsn 'saH as&
A bury negro man in town. named Bill Ts'
ry. was suspected, : number rel Of persons, ia
famed and excited By view of The persor
! and moved by The tale of1hs sufferer, instant
hunted him up. On examnalisnS his lip We
!, ; found 70 be scratched and marked in the mar
ner descvibed BY the sufferer, So soon IS thi
! vas cOmmenssd OF by has saPtors. and before
Il had been informsd Of be object Of their gisi
be romarksa-lehe did not DO ttat.'' 9th
declarations made by him, and proofs obtaihe'
satisfied the whole town that he was the vi
}. wretch who pertetraaed the atrocious deed.
4 The people thcreupon seized him. carrie
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25

ring the ysar Sc. vs think our patrons viii
without grumbling. give them ATeleass for tbs
rear with a half sheet on New-yesrs day--eo.
ing upon this hypothesis, there viii be issued
usxt week half Ahest only. We hope mat
oar patrons may enjoy the namer'u' blessings
now in store for their mOriaitiss, from cellar %
gayrst and As The Preachers say. not forget.
tlng .hs .,mOrs important" in their TiOtous liy,
ing Congress and Gll august "InsIituIions"
81 ths kind, play ''quits" (and some Of them
euehre) during Christmas times and Why
should not We
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25
law OF Newspnpers.

Subscribers who do not give notice to the contra
., are considered as wishing continue then suoScrp
II subscribers order the discontinuance OF their
nsosrs tie sublisher may continue TO send them un
all larrsArages are paid ,.Lor.a. -
.is tom the Office TO Whch they are directed, they
are held responsible ill they have settled the blu, and
II subscrbers remove TO other places without IN
tormng ,be nubshers and the papers are sent to The
former daertion, they are held responsible, ~,
S. The Courts have decided sna ss'us isasos ,hen
PasSed for Il pga }acia evidence fraud
az Postmaster Who notify apublsher that news
r.esis not taket from the oico are required to CIV
ths rsa san Why they not taken Odt Nseo foS' VI
A,s Instrructons and Laws.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25


Tna H.RD MosEr HuHBUo EslsoDAp' ~
Seersiary Guthrie says in this message thas !
''psss uelallic currency may be SET down as i1'I
praetieabls daasE oar Constitution and Laws
to say nothing q the sentiment Of the PsOele.F
Thus ends the hard money humbug, which
for ssvesGiyuzrz aOasinasd. .lhs pEineipal pollt,
isal commodity Of the Democratic party. A
mong the distinguished advocates Of this absur-
disy, was Thomas Hart =BsatOa, who at that
lfns whsa oalnpmiagpId mines were ystun-
discovered salked &C goh running u. the
Aississinpi." When the banks were not halt
50 numerous As lheJ are nov, the bard money
demagOgass we're Cor cutting them of Laus
we're passed. even within half dozen years
to restrain The banks from The issue o. small
notes. aud the people from passing them. Prac.
tically these laws are OF no more effect thar
blank paper. They can deye, bepOt any
effect The people must aud win use the mos
eOnyeneal currency, whether that be bias
buttons or paper dollars. II the Governmen
establish means Of coinage and prescribe :
legal tender, it has done all in its power. Con
mercs must do ths rest,
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25

II il 4 very seTviceabls menEsl exercise TO trace
out the essential. though not palsHt, similar
lilies, and. if 10 better purPOas ! subserE'd'
il at least quicksns The vii and AHOrds US ra-
tiOnal amusement. An analogy Of sole than
usual interest. and bstwsea subjects more lhkn
commonly divided. has jRss eesaFad p us and
for example sake, we shall endeaVor TO ioncW
IL and seq how faEit leads.
Who could bslsvs. foF isaancessh hat a. T.
nalOgy subsisted betwessn ouF sOoAug and >
Pill And stlhsFs is. in many points, . rad
ical simitude-as We shall new prove.
In every branch Of physcGl devslOPsHient
/ il seems to be our destiny to conquer. 10
every branch Of physical disease, the Pill and
/ Ointment Il POrfsssOr Holloway have proved
efRcaoious for a eurs.
| With population iafsriOr to Great Britain,
we have more miles Of telegraph and rail-
road than England France and Austria
ieombined. From his central establishment in
London, Pref Holloway has rescued and Te-
stored 10 beallhm patients than the united
tphyscians Of the world.
Our commerce aud our fame cover every sea-
HIS pills are in the reach and his, praise Is on
the tongue of every nation on the globe
The elastic character of our institutions
enables us to. ACCOMMODATE our growth t'
tbs sccsssons which are msuilesty in reserv'
for u.s. The strictly universal principles upon
which aolloways' Remedies are compounded
enable them to grapple with and overcome
every variety of disease; they destroy In
manifestations of silnept by graduating II
!. cause.
|. There is a mighty dsstiay in store Tor tn
4 TEnit,d States; the, will absorb eventually ever
weaker government by the force OF the Dem
" oaratic idea. The idea OF Prof Holloway
ie La;ueysol Reuasdissis one essentially democrats
or !, Aos. not limit he Alth to wealth but gives
a fr.e boon to all who ask for aud employ it.
a also will eventually absorb all Inferior schoo
~ of practice and be regarded, untversaily'(As
he already is by the Wise) as the supreme an
n only remedy. .,;.
by Our countr, is much given to annexation
in but uses whatever power it may acquire e1ci
Of sivelv for the benefit Of the annexed Pro
p- Holloway has extended his medical dominic /
: !. ever the four quarters of the eSrth-he h
10 penetrated even The remOtest haunts OF u
M BARBARIAN; and yet he carries blessings in
IN hand and the only burden he imposes al
sh those Of happiness and health.
of We could carry out the remarkable siml
n. tudes Of these apparently disconnected su
:" iects into infinite detaiI but enough has be
e'' already said to arouse the attention oil
reader, and a very little thought will sna'
him to follow up the train OF meditation
have started. The proudest destiny We
wisb ibe United States is, that they can en-
late in the body polite, tho wonderworkl
: usefulness of the U. R. universal remedl'
the ID the body PHYSICAL Let our statesmen ,L 10
Gu 70 II and ace that we are not outsIrpped!-N.
Nat Police Gazette
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25

LANCASTER (pA.) BANk.-EiIOrts are being
made to resusc,ate this bank, which recently
suspended. The Lancaster. Express ofthe 18th
says =
"Upto the hour of going to press, SloO
shares of new stock had been subscribed, and
the good work was sill going on when we left
the Bank. We have no doubt that the cou'
mittee appointed, VIII secure 'he amount in
very short time probably before the hexi
meeting, which will be this day two weeks
Within the last three weeks the assets of the
Bank have absorbed $233, 900 Of its circulation
leaving, after deducting $4,000 locked up il
the County Bank, on good collateral, notes de
stoysd, etc., but little over s40o, ,0o0 actua
circulation. We have no doubt that il all par
ties do their duty the bank will be placed on
solid foundation"
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25
IustIoe Election.

Rsmember. gen1sasn of tAo rank and file
Of The eunsuhdasa' belonging 10 the CeAIrs
Diyhion, thst there is to be !ss'Ce Of the
Paass elected, o. Saturday, q 'nt
next year, to 'salsrceds.' (Aye, sha 'S;N> y, ''I
She present incumbent. whose terG is NSoI
expired Whose second and last term is aboa
expired.
L any one Office crested for any one man
i at he should hold on by kind Of Divin
rigbsf Let sAs psopls dssids between the pres
sat incumbent. Il. A. Stdgsr, Esq, and hi
LOnss.. usfsehing competitor, Mr.. ssorge A
brahms, uho has never ssked Office.
slaal No. AbrDhins. the ssmpetsnt, hoae'
aai apfigh. mAa, Be distAncsd BY The Divin
RI sbG gsntlemass We eshall see.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1856-12-25
I,eriSYaIure ct Ohio.

!Fhis bsdv viii sonveae ca the first Monday
Of next mOAth, pursuant To adjournment IN ,iAA'
April. 1t haa Row pending before 1t several
important bill, for consideration al the ADJOURN
ed session. AnOng those the one extending
The time Of paying She taxes Of tho State in-
t.r..ts the massss nors directly than perhaps
all the others. That measure was recommend
sI BIZ Ex. Governor Medill, in his last annual
message, and at the time Il made an unfaVor-
able impression upon our mind, for the reason
that We suppOssd that too SstIs'Ot duplicates
would necessarily bO made by the Aud 'lor Tor
the Treasurer. thsrsby increasing the LABOR
and Increasing the Auditors pay. But by the
bill nov pending. but one duplicate with an
additional column, alone will be suticlen''-
Therefore the increased expenses to tie peo-
ple will be but trhs, whilst they will have
gained a doaJls advantage. First. by the pres
sni law alb tAs money for the fiscal year goes
into the State Treasury in February. and un-
der the existing laws loaned by the State
Treasurer 10 sons bank till needed by tAe
proper officers TO pay ~ interest upsn the
81 New.York aud clsswAers, on
the ffst Of Jsly oi each year.
Under The administration Of the Locoioco
Treasurer ia. Brssn these funds we're loaned
to banks and private cOaPaniss, uat'l the S'a''
has lost hundreds ei thousands Of dollars BY
those oanr. That danger will be avoided BY
permitting the people TO bold one half OF thu
Ia os Nd ill the first or tenth Of June prior tc
Il. being needed in JOly for the interest debit
And secoAdy, Tbe people would have one hall
ofths MiloH and half Of aoosy that is now
Ioeksd upis the Treasstiss Of the State. during
,bat season OF the gear that money matters are
the tightsst. The bill provides that one ha9f ol
ths lases must be paid as now, bY tho twent''
.,b AZ December, and The rSsdae by the hrs
or tenth (day Of month not recollccted) Of June
thereafter. Yot any who desire TO pay al
tbsir taxes As nov, osa do 80 The only OH
ear vbose l.bor IL materially increased or rath
ar extended Is tho Treasurer OF the County
aho will have 10 sit TILL June instead oil Deeem
Der. Of the presious ysar. 20 "a this seem
not uniAlr because the Treasurer will still re
sevs more pay in proportion to the time EN-
pIoyed than any other cOauty oGl'sr And DO
sides the Interests oil the people demand It, an'
our word for il, they can always find publ
ssruaas enough who will willing accept tn
post. Then let the Legislature proceed to ger
feet the useful measures and adjourn with a
liulo delay o. possible.