Orleans independent standard. [volume] (Irasburgh, Vt.) 1856-1871, 1856-09-12
DYING ADVICE OF HON. MR..
SMTRK.

i Simon Smirk was on his death bed.
His son Samuel was standing by his
side; and while he was holding his fa-
ther's hand, his father spoke to him as fol-
: lows =
Sammy 1 am dying-at the age of if
ty five. l wish you to pay strict attention
tc my dying adviceF'
8 Father / will"
And 1 wish you to follow my advice
after 1 am dead,
4 viii, father"
Sammy, the neighbors, and all my
friends tell me I haven't an enemy in the
world, and l believe haven't. l want
you to understand why | haven't. It's
all owing TO policy Sam; policy, and
nothing shorter. When / was of your
age, my boy, l was poor as broken down
: village horse turned out 10 die. Age las
at last broken me down, but amt poor
? thank policy! Follow my example, and
you will become richer by far, than yDur
) father, Sammy, and die without an ee-
| my, as I dol
: Sammy wept, as in duty bound, hut
grief and his handkerchief choked hs
Inference, so he said nothing.
1t has always been my policy" re,
. sumed the dying Smirk, "to avoid giving
offence TO any one. No matter what peo-
, pie said or did to me-or any one else
right or wrong-I have always endeay
ored to submit, wherever l could to be
calm and cautious ON all occasions, and t.
avoid the exhibition ofany sign of resent
I ment. By long experience in this course,
t l have found that by perseEering to agree
] with everybody skilfully, is sure event
t ual guide to universal popularity"
! But have you never had any diff
: Guilty with any one?"
" Not since I was twenty-one," said
] the dying man grasping for breath.
{, Reach me little water, and wet my
fps-they are too panched to speak plain.
e There, there, he added as his sen obeyed
e him: that will do, and you shall be init
lated into my invariable, and invaluable
5 policy. Be deferential- Sam, defere,no,ti;aall,
and control your temp~+' kow
- 80. chance, have DOW
and smile, and shake of the hand for
e everybody, mark everybody and then
r you will get along"
v But l mustn't be friendly to villains,
must / ?'
e " Friendly! humph be friendyto no.
: body seem so. Villains they compose
ot two thirds of the community, AID are
= most influential. As for the Other third,
,t though it is well to keep their good opin-
1t ion, they are only subordinate agents in
If the building up of man. But don't get
n affronted with them. Oh, no Sam; never
N do that! Never kick dog unless you
W are sure he hasen't any owner, then kick
'r away, if you like"
Ie Though bis father was dying. Samue
if could not help smiling at such language
a That's right" said the elder Smirk
IN . 1 like that. Smile again, Sam, Smil'
n again. By smiling have gained man,
m friend. But be careful you don
is smile at the wrong time. L smile is
rs powerful weapon, but must be used witt
ae Judgment.
n. "Do you know, Sam, why was alway
nd such fayorite with the women"
IN "No father"
" / was always careful, in the first plac'
Vn to feel my way with women took car
ad to understand their character, the
I'D sentiments, their particular vanities an
lg, hobbies, keeping my own ideas in th
ed back ground, until could coincide wit
theirs. always took care never TO spea
X Idisrespectfully of the SEX never in Il
In presence Of woman, called a woman
to woman, or a female. / had but OF
oi- name, ladies for all the feminine gender
ny How did you do when they differe
ere and asked your opinion"
iaa ] would agree with one, and at d
me same time wink at the others slyly,
'u' much as to say tbs all hnmbug, what
f'' am saying If woman was ugly,
rye praised her intellect. If she didel
ne. know anything, I'd praise her virtue.
iea seldom miss the mark for it is ugly, il
Ar' moral and fool in the bargain.
uie fact il is hard to find anybody who has
'e some good point, or who isn't suseePtii
- to hatery in some way or other; and
an man must be fool who, determined
.n@' aatter, and make bis hattery aeceptab
e can't seize hold Of some msnt, in mil
'he heart, form offace Of the person he wi
a es to please, and feigning to admire
''s' make that person friendly"
Must be stingy or liberal 7"
Oh, be liberal, By all means, said
- dvins, man. with a 0hasnv emiie. - 1