Daily American organ., 1856-03-07
ou know the reason Why Jack didn't eat his sup

you know the reason why Jack didn't eat his sup
perr
Ten o'clock, AZ / live and church viii com
meuce In half an hour How can lever get ready
shall have TO wear the shirt AS IL Ia. As good
luck would have il, the bosom isn't wet and ns
that's the only part shown, il won't make a dif
of bitterance." great practice-that Of 'sput
ting the best on the outside" Bosoms no ex-
cepton-and who can tell how many bosoms--
bosonls white as the driven sn0w-( tisn't every
one has good wash shwomaD) b0soms that rise and
swell like the heaving Of the occan---(or swell
clerk and cause real bosoms to swell ditto-are,
when search below false AS my wig and fastened
30 the body by false stringsy Thank nv stare I
never false bosom, and I never wil
Well, at last have got TO caurch--but with a
heart in which angry PASSIONS rise" and in a
s:ate OF mind very unfit for that holy place Some
how the chime of the old bel don't sosnd as sweet
a. II is won't and the singing Of the choir, though
always beautiful heretofore, seems but hollow
mockery. All! when the heart is not right how
vain the hope Of deriving pleasure from religion,
or indeed anything else.
What cracked voice the minister has got I
declare it reminds me Of the broken wssh-bowl
All! there's Miss Susan Gabbls. Susan il sensi-
BILE sort of woman--rather old--but then, she's
not one OF the sort that 'nover grows old" There's
a great deal Of comfort in knowing that though
person may change outwardly, there's something
lasting within that de6es even the rayages of time
And in the hour of death 1t must be sweet TO know
that you can leave behind you name that can
"never grow old"
Susan doesn't belong to this class--yery few do.
Let me see; I've about come to the conclusion
that want wife--if don't marry I'm afraid mn
name will grow old the day after I'm dead-inas-
much as am the last Of " my noble family. y the
last OF three brothers--al bachelors TO the last
This Is one very serious objection TO single blessed
ness-a fellows name is apt to die away and on
that account should advise no one to be bache-
lori hey can help IL. It wouldn't work we'll in
the long rum were the world-the masculine por-
tion--one vast society Of " Shakers or bachelors
it would be world Of hyprocrites- the human
family would of course die away. Speaking Of
Shakers, believe, had been Shaker in my
youth should have been married. long married
ere this. Mankind is averse 20 being fettered.
womankind ditto; chain them down to rules and
regulations--make them 20 to church six times
every Sunday-forbid intercourse between the sex.
es while young-and they're mighty apt to kick In
the traces, and overset the ondest wishes of their
mistaken guardians.
believe I'll see Miss Susan Gabble home after
meeting
That's an awful long -windsd minister I've a
great notion to throw my boot at him. do hate
long sermons. I'm great lover OF the short
aud sweet" doctrine, and believe that even link
of pleasure can be too "long drawn OUT
AT last services are ended. The last psalm Is
sung, the last prayer is offered the benedction--
there goes Susan. Now comes the tug of war ~
Miss Gabble--Miss Susan Gabble--alow me,
my dear madam, on account of the similtude OF
our ages-to--to--haye the supreme felicity
To-
Why, what look guess she never spoke to
gentleman before.
"Our ages, indeed! I'd have you to know, sir,
that I'm not so old as to be obliged to wear false
hair and a false set of teeth, andn--
4 don't wear a false BOSOM plague take you,
nor yet cotton bosom 70
Home, sweet home, says Payne, and thus says
Phumble. How dear to my heart is bachelors
hall, after the exhibition / have just had of wo-
mans lack OF sense! Susan Gabble too old for me
Just as If didn't wenta courtin" of her many
and many's the night FIVE and twenty years ago,
tony shame tell it) Just as ii she wasn't proud
OF me, and would have become Mrs. Phumble for
the asking and just as II che was as young now
as she was FIVE and twenty years agos Oh Susan,
Susan Gabble too well have you learned the ways
Of the world; too well have you learned to practice
the deceit of your class Of community. But you
scant hide the wrinkles. Susan, they brand you in
the face liar; and the rose on your cheek, like
yourwould-be girlish actions, is as false as your
swelling cotton bosom!