The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1856-04-16

nate example Of your sisters??"
"a fudge for the example of my sisters,
exclaimed the girl with spirit, ~ choose
make trial myself Did you ever see pare
of pigs running to trough of hot swill? tt
first one sticks III his nose, gets scalded, an
then drew back and squeals. The secon
burns his nose and stands squealing in the sam
manner The third follows suit and he squalls
too. But still it makes no difference with thos
behind; but all in turn thrust in their nose
justs as if the first hadn't got burned or squeal
ed at all So it is with girls in regard to ma
trimony -and now with this I hope you ar,
satisfied.
An empty skulls bound to shine in compa
ny, because the proprietor Of it has not wi
enough to know that there is a possibility .
of making nincompoop Of himself, and there
fore, he dashes ahead, hit on miss Or generally
succeeds beyond expectation. Let a man b
minus brains and pluss bras and he is sure o
pass through the world as ifgreased from
ear to ankle, but rig up for him a complete
machinery of thought, and it is as much as hi
can do to tend to it, He goes to the grave
rufied and tumbled, curses life for its care, and
moseys into eternity, pack saddled with men.
tai misery. Ohf the happiness Of fools.
GLOW do you know, said an enlightened
European to an ignorant savage of Asia chow
do you know there is a God?''
GLOW do you know, replied the savage,
pointing to human footsteps. chow doiiyou
know that men have passed this way9'
A dandy is noticed in Chicago of such nice
tastes that he grcases his boots with the oil Of
bergamot. He is first cousin to the youth that
sleeps on a bed Of spongecale.
When an Arab woman intends to marry
again after the death Of her husband, she
comes in the night before her second marri-
age, to the grave Of her husband. Here she
kneels and prays to him, and entreats him not
to be offended-not to be jealous As how
ever, she fears be will be Jealous and an
cry, the widow brings with her donkey, Ia
den with two goat skins of water. Herprayers
and entreaties done, she proceeds to pour on
the grave the water to keep the first husband
cool under the irritating circumstances about
TO take place; and having well saturated him,
she departs
Archaeology, like good many other things,
may be "run into tie ground;,' and we think
that col. Rawlinson has done it, when he an
nounces to the world that be has exhumed|
from the ruins Of Babylon the mummy Of Neb-
uehadnezzer The mummy has been sent to-
the museum Of the British East India compa-
ny; but If there is any othereyidence that is
Nebuchadnezer's than some costly and gaudy
trapPings around il, and a lively fancy indulg-
ed in by the dlscoverer, we are not informed
of it. But could not some light be thrown up-
on this question BY an examination Of the teeth,
to ascertain whether they are herebivoroas? ny
Where is professor Owen? He asestablish-
ed the character and species. Of many an ex-
tinct mammal by d single bone or grinder, and
If he could only show that this dried up hui
man was accustomed to 'seating grass, no one
would thcnceforth be skeptical enough to doubt
that it was indeed ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Another
auestion--is there any hattening ofsthe inner3Et.
sides Of the knees, caused BY their very violent
shifting together?
The New Era relates q story 81. q young.
farmer whose son had for a long time been os-
enslbly Studying Latin in popular academy
The farmer not being perfectly satisfied With
he course and conduct Of the young hopeful, f.
'ecalled him from school, and placing him BY
he side Of carton day, thus addressed him: n
Now, Joseph, here is a fork, and there is a f.
leap of manure and a cart What do you call
hem iii Latins'
"Forlibus, cartibus ct manuribus,,' said Jo-
eph, Il
Well, now said the farmer, if you don't v
axe that forkibus pretty quickibus, and take s.
hat manuribus into that cartibns, I'll break
our backibus.'
Joseph went to workibus ferthwithibus.
John Hunter believed that when there was H
'nly one daughter and several sons III the fami-
7, the daughter was always of a musculne
Isposltion-and that when family consisted ass
several daughters and one son, the son was q
lways efeminate. S.
An English paper tells 4 story Of 4 scientificll
scturer whose popular discourses on medicine
nd the various sciences Herewith connected III
ad given offence the more orthodox mern-
ers of the profession. a couple Of embryo
|. DIS resolved upon testing his medical skill.
hey accordingly called upon him, and one oftg
lem, fine healthy young man, with a rogu-
b eye, complained Of certain painsin the chest, 9
cough, night sweats, dc. The doctor heard y y
is tale, asked a number Of questions, and, af-. a
4 q long diagnosis, declared him to be in al n
eep consumption. This was just what was 4
anted, and the young gents could hardly conf )
Of their mirth while doctor Mil wrote his pre- II
rlptlon, sealed It up in all envelope, and di-
cted it to one Of the first chemists in town, al
,cketed his fee, and bowed them out of the y
ON. To the chemists they rushed to enjoy j
e pent-up laugh, and handing him the note, i
read: This young man is suffering from ce q
bri hernia IN the region marked sself-esteem 4 =
phrenologists. Pray, therefore, give him b br
nmon sense, il grains; wit drachm; horse sa
lip, ad libitum-J NJ Wehardly expect 7
E doctor got another professional patientthere. S
A writer beautifully remarks that a mans \
'ther is the representative of his Maker. :.
sfortune and even crimes set no barriers be-
cen her son. While his mother lives he has y.
E friend who will not listen when he is SLAM bo
red, who will not desert him when he sufz / for
), who will soothe him ID his sorrows, and =
ak to him of home when he is ready to de- i
lir. Her affections know no ebbing tide.-
ey flow on from pure fountain, and speak !
oplness through this vale Of tears, and cease a
Y at the ocean Of eternity. .