The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1856-02-13
SHREVEPORT, LOUISIANA, WEDNESDAY, FEBRUl

What We ALL Do.-An amusing, and even
instructive hour, may be spent, if any one will
but search out from the confused figures of the
census the number of persons following various
occupations in the United States. Thus we re-
joice as a naticn in having two thousand per-
sons who pronounce themselves artists though
| there are probably not score who will live in
mems memories, and certainly not one who
seems likely to dethrone Raphael Of authors
we have, according to the census, only eighty
two; that is, but eighty-two are willing to con
fess to genius and garret," though if publish
er's advertisements are to be believed, every
new month gives birth to new literary star,
and one more brilliant than any that ever went
before him. To pass to bank officers and bro
kers is very natural transition, and of the for
mer We are favored with fourteen hundred;
of the latter with six thousand, exempHfying
the old adages that ssit never rains but pours'
and that blessings never come sngly. -
Luckily, there are a hundred thousand honest,
stout-hearted blacksn1iths, as make weight
against this Egyptian plague Of flies in the shape
of brokers and bankers Moreover, there are
six thousand BARRIERS to shave" the six thou
sand brokers, and thus revenge the community,
"
We have two million and half of farmers;
seventy thousand mariners; one hundred thou
sand merchants; sixty -four thousand masons,
and nearly two hundred thousand carpenters.
We have fourteen thousand bakers to make our
bread; twenty -four thousand lawyers to set us
by the ears; forty thousand doctors to ''kill OF
cure" and fifteen hundred editors to keep this
motley mass in order by the potent power Of
public opinion, controlled and manufactured
through the press. We have eleven thousand
hatters, ten thousand tobacconists, and thirty
one thousand weayers Against thirty thou
sand teachers we can set of fifty thousand tai-
lors, SO that we care nearly twice as much for
adorning the bodyas we do for decking out the
mind. Only twenty two thousand people have
been willing to set themselves down as servants,
though most of us serve others in some capac-
ity or other, from the bootblack who polishes
our shoes, to the bookseller who brightens the
public intellect. Nobody, according to the cen
sus, follows the trade of a politician; though
there are enough, heaven knows, in this city
alone, to have condemned dozen Sodoms or
Gomorrahs. The census fails to record, like
wise, the existence Of any patriots among us,
though we have long thought that patriotism
was especially profession and nothing else.
The forty thousand physicians support five
hundred undertakers, which gives the impor-
tant statistical fact, that it takes eighty doctors
to keep one undertaken in brisk business
We have fifteen hundred wagon makers; three
thousand watchmakers; seventy-eigh ght vinegar
makers, including, we suppose, all the cross
wives, crusty bachelors, and verjuice old maids;
thirty thousand wheel-wrights, and thirty three
showmen. We have four thousand cutters;
twenty three thousand saddles, and five thou
sand railroad men. We have one hundred and
fifty opticians and ten oculists, but nearly four
thousand confectioners, proving that we care
infinitely more for eating than for eyesight.-
This reminds us that there are five thousand
brewers and seven hundred wine dealers, but
the census, strange to say, is silent as to the
number who drink beer and s'quaff the rosy
In all, we have about FIVE millions and half
above the age of fifteen years, who are busiy
employed at some trade, profession or other oc.
cupation, by which to earn a livelihood. It is
plain. we are not nation of sluggards. We
nearly all do something. Nay, to be an idle
drone is happily no recommendation in Amer
1 lea, as it is in the arstocratc and monarchical
countries in Europe. b. ..Es 5a
ROMANCE OF MAGNETISM. Eugene Guizot
gives us an incident in Partisan life which be
regards as romantic, and which is at least anus
ing. sT "@. @
The scene is laid in the pavilion attached to
a country house in the neighborhood of the
great city; the time few minutes Of 1 1 P NJ
Mons. Armand awaits with impatience Mad. x
with whom he has arranged an interview at
that hour, quite innocently, but less prudish
people should not so regard it, quite secret.
Close to the appointed time Mons. Armand
hears footsteps! 1t is the lady? The door
opens! He stands stupefed in the presence Of
the husband. Mons. X. has returned from Pa
ris, and deeming it too late to awaken the
sleepers of the house, comes to share the room
of his friend in the pavilion. ea
The conversation between the lover (shall
we call him soy and the husband is amusing,
and as the hour approaches the perplexity of
the former increases. His agitation leads him
to the most inconsistent remarks, and the most
inexplicable questions. - 5 ".T
~"What is the matter with you?" asks the
husband. ..., ..,-......- + ... ...-.. '-
Nothing at all"
Il discompose you-how strangely youlook!
Have interrupted something serious?"
The lover stands, his hands pressed upon a
little table, weak and nervous with agitation
"Ah!' exclaimed the husband, II see, you
were about to try an experiment in table turn
ingP' yr .a saaesz5 .fsf. ..gs 0na
The suggestion saves the lover. Gradually
recovering he admits the fact The whole pub
lie was then in rage oftable turning, and the
most marvellous effects were attributed to the
mysterious process. s55t45 -54@. .&.-=s
Yes exclaimed Mons. Armand, Il admit
it. r. You smile at me. You doubt! Shall /
prove to you, by an exhibition Of true science,
one ofthose miracles Of magnetism of which |
speak? Will you close your eyes to the evi-
dence of facts?''
"No, ask nothing better than actual proof"
''You shall have it. My will can traverse
space and orerawe distance. Name some one
at the chateau, and will summon him here in
moment. Shall it be your aunt?'' -.-..
.|'Oh, no! she is too old, and the experiment
would ruin u.s. sy~s 5 "@
s'Your wife, then" z4# s rs #
Very well-my wife," 81 g 54g
~ al ! L L. /