The Opelousas patriot. [volume] (Opelousas, Parish of St. Landry, La.) 1855-1863, 1856-01-12
sohes, of Gwe s{i,,o am Smother.

Mr.. EngGeld Ham was recently married to
Miss Jemima Egge, on Friday"
"What blessings children are!" as the
parish clerk said when he took the fee for |
christening them.
Said Scotch girl, 81 dinna ken wha max s |
brother Will like the lasses SO! For my part,
l had rather hae one laddie than twa lasses!"
A man being commiselated WITH on account
of his wife running away, said, Don't pity me
till she comes back again s'
The story of q man who had nose so large
that he couldn't blow it without The use Of
gunpowdcr is said to be Il hoax.
Mr.. smikes says, desperate diseases require
desperate remedies and that is the reasonwhy
he got married when in love.
An advertisement lately appeaard in the
Dublin QreIantD Evening Post: Iron
bedsteads and beddlng" 4 portion OF the
latter must be sheet iron.
Some of our contemporaries are discussing the
question, which is the safest SD in case of a
railroad collision. We should choose one
about hundred yards from the railroad.
al understand your father is dead" said a
man to little boy as he entered the house.
F" You're right now, old hoss," said he, he's
laid out in tother room as cold as wedge! :"
| A boy at school in the West when called to
recite his lesson history, was asked: What
is the German Diet: =" "sour krout, schnapps,
and lager beer" was the reply.
"John,' said gentleman to his apprentice,
as he was about leaving home to be absent
week, you must take my place while am
gone" "Thank you sir, innocently replied
John, +" would rather sleep with the boys"
| A German writer says that the people Of the
United States can burst more steamboats, and
chew more tobacco than any other five nations
of the globe. This man must have Travelled
among US with his eyes open.
The Dutchman who refused to take one
dollar bill because it might be altered from a
ten, prefers stage travelling to railroads Iht
former, he says rides him eight hours for {
dollar, while the latter only rides him one.
1t is said that in certain geological garden
when the eagle is suffering from indigestion, h
is not allowed TO walk about the grounds 10
fear of the magistrates taking notice Of it as al
. i'll eagle proceeding.
A gentleman asked friend, in knowing
manner" fray SIT, eiu you eSet seo " y"
G fsh?" "No, sir" was the response; "but
y have seen rope walk Wonder if he eve
\ I saw o horse fly? 'a
An lrishnan in Chicago has just discovere
n a substitute for potatoes. 1t consists OF por
p and cabbage. lie says he has tried variot
n n other things, but this is the only substitute
= that he'd like to warrant"
h Brcathes there man with soul so dea
e who never to himself hath said, will o fami
le paper take, both for my, own and children
l. sake? Ii such there be, let him repent, al
h have our paper to him sent.
:. s. "Elder, will you have drink Of cider
IL IL INQUIRED d farmer of an old temperance ma
~ ~ who was spending the evening at his hou'
~ ~ " No. thank ye," said the old man, :. l nev
Is drink liquor Of any kind, Specially cider b
- if you call it apple Juice l don't care if l
T. take a leete."
10 "Mrs. Briggs" said a neighbor, who stepr
lie into the house of the former just as she "
nd in the act of sitting herself at the dinner tab
re have you heard Of the dreadful accident.
"Why, no-.vhat is it," "Mr. Briggs