Thibodaux minerva. [volume] (Thibodaux, La.) 18??-1858, 1856-03-22
The Happy Typo.

Mark Tapley-a human barrel of holiness with
out hoops on-was arrested for being intoxicated
He gave his name as Geettaphat Take, and said he
was printer, and hailed from the Gem Of
Science" office. He is short man, of a bcer-cask
figure, and face as rubicund as if he slept in a
room with red curtains. His answers to the ques'
tons of the authorities showed his contentment
under all shades of misfortune. The justice being
in genial humor, was inclined to banter the dis
ciple of Ben Franklin, and accordingly addressed
him as follows:
Judge-Well, Mr.. Take, it seems that you have
thrown aside the composing stick and gone to
getting drunk for a living. am afraid you are a
"bad case" and stand in need of correcting"
think | shall send you to "quod."
Those technicates which were uttered in sort
of you see1-know yourtradeas-w -youdo, sir,
seemed to give Mr. Take that assurance which
printers seldom lack, but of which the solemnities
of court might temporarily have deprived him,
and he answered.:
Prisoner- Well, at any rate, I'm glad we've
no "gaeys" in this country, Or | suppose you'd
put me in there, and well Headed at that. But,
bless you sir, going to Jail is nothing; the last time
was there tanned rat and fought him to chew
tobacco, besides inventng three new steps for a
fancy hor1pipe-it's good deal better than set
ting solid minon," more than three-quarters figure
WORK" and getting only "price and half for it.
Lord bless you, Squire, I'd great deal rather go
to jail than not. I've got sick Of work just now,
and I'll have chance to get the bile Oft my
stomach.
Julge-You seem to take it easy; how do you
propose to employ your time this trip?
Prisoner Well, Corporal, l ann undecided
whether I'll learn to whistle the Bohemian Girl,
practice standing on my head, Or undertake to ac-
quire the elegant accomplishment of balancing
straws on my nose; if could get cat I'd teach
her to play the fiddle, if l thought the strings
wouldn't remind her unpleasantly of intestinal dis
cords after her feline body had been nine times
slain.
Judye-Mr Take, you seem particularly happy
under these circumstances. Have you got wife?
Pr;soner-Not now, Lieutenant; had one, but
she ran off with bow-legged cobbler; | was so
glad that | sent her her dresses and quit claim
deed of her person, which signed in capital let
tiers. She left me one boy, but he was foul
copy" not bit like me-" l bound him prentice
to the type sticking trade, but the first day he
quarreled with the Irregular devil" knocked over
the 'bank," pulled form off the imposing
stone," and "pied' five columns; he dropped the
shooting-stick" into the ALLIGATOR press, and in
the evening he and another boy were caught re-
hearsing broad-sword combat with couple OF
column rules" the foreman battered" him with
"nallet," and when he got home to me he had
a fancy head" if there ever was one.
C2erk-Where is he now?
Prisoner-Hc ran away with circus and the
last l saw of him he was in the middle Of saw
dust ring trying to tie his legs in bowknot round
his neck. I've been jollier since then than ever
before.
Judge-You seem to be always jolly.
Pyisoner-So am; laughed when my father
turned me out of doors at eleven years of age;
laughed when l broke my arm, and made saucy
faces at the doctor when he was setting it; the
hadpiest day | ever spent was one time when
hadn't but one shirt and pair of pants to put on,
had spent all my money, and had gone hungry
forty hours never was really unhappy but once
in my life, and that was when fell down stairs,
fractured my collal-bone, and skinned my leg so
badly that couldn't get down on my knees to
thank God that hadn't broken my neck.
The Judge relented and let Mr. Take 60, and
that rotund individual left the trying to whistle
and sing at the same time, and also dance an indie
pendent jig with each leg to different tune.
....,. --&&-