Delaware weekly Republican. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1841-188?, 1856-12-04

WHOLE N i. 996
/ 9llmorous.
Ibe best threw you can make with dice il t.
throw them a~A5s
Beauty without virtue is like a flower withoHt
A Eailor looking serious in chapein Boston, was
asked bya minister If ho felt any changef
'Nota cent ! said Jack
Western editor wants 70 know whether the law
recently enacted against carry ing concealed wea-
pons applios doctors who carry their pills In fher
pockets. 2 tSA
James, now viii hear your lesson said q
schoolmaster to little urchin who was not in the
j habit Of studying much. Gueih not ,thir papa
'nns ii''le boyths shoald be thoen and not heara'
~ don z care % much about the bugs, said Mr..
Wormey 90 the head OF the genteel private family
10 which he resd es but the fact is marm, hagnt
got the blood to spare; ysu soc that yonsseif'
Coon fDsA.-Tho following notice Is posted
conapicuousy in publication cfiee down East
ichat this door, and as you have done talk
ing on business. serve your mou th the same way"
An exchange paper, under the head of good adj
wee, ADVISES ysung men to WRAP Themselves up
| 10 virtue. A oo-temporary we'll says. MARY Of
lhem would freeze to death if they had no warmer
covering S 4. 3i io
Honesty is the best poloy.' said one sootohman to
ann0,ther aln,t who had narrowly escaped angling fer
~ know IT, said the other, for have tried both
sides Of that question
"A noted politician was recently caught in the aet
OF perrsing the scriptures Upon asking him what
paItcula. portion Of the good book he had selected
Tor examination, he replied; II am reading tho
story. about the ioaves and fshes." nsfs
Father, ain't you opposed to monopolygn shouted
little fellow, as his parent took up the brandy
bottle. Yes, my boy" "Then give me a drink
has not tasted liquor since ~ =
The senior editor Of the Piils5aTs Despatch Lost
bis beard, acrop of five years growth on the recent
election Verify, betting musi have grown to be q
man. naaia Fiin & us Men We bel the very hair of our
OF sharper and was shaved. lgI
from stage coach, when piece Of ri6bin from her
bonnet fell into the coach s'You have left your
sow s.i,st, behind, S said lady passenger 'oh 10
the damssl, proceeding on her way. -
How shall 1 soil my horssS' said certain doc.
tor 70 horse jeckeg. his tail of in less than
six hours after i gos, him ta
Why sell him BY Wholesale replied the other,
sfor sure no honorable man i'll rs.tail him.
Did you present yeur account to The defsndsnt!,
inquired lawyer Of his clerk.
= II did sir ~ Hlae A5s
snVhat did he say7, ie Aitt ~
3 HE told me to go TO the devil, sir s3
Well and what did you do aftor thatf'
Why them, came to you
The lawyer looked rather got.
: A married gentleman, every dime he met ths
father OF his ife,i planned to him Of the ugly
temper and disposition Of his daughter. AT last.
upon one occasion the old gentleman becoming
weary Of the grumblingH oil his sonsin law exclaimed
fou are right, sne is inpert inent jade and II
hear amy more complaints OF her L will dislpherit
her-" The husband made no more complaints.
.wHsRE Was Fiat Kenwya, two dogs, one of
which was the raIsen 3 were lighting at the west end
of the church, The parson, who was then reading
the second lesson, rushed out of his pew wont down
and parted them, returned to the pew and doubtful
where be had of, asked the clerk Roger where
why down parting the dogs, mastern said
Roger. ni~ q
Too Coon TO BE Losr.-In Illinois, a short time
since, the Democracy advertised a grand barbecue,
.stake lace on Friday. Tho thing whs advertised
COMMITTEES were utterly taken aback By a visit from
the Democratic Irish, q leader among whom said to
them, Az shure, didn't ye know bother than to
have barbecue on Friday, wbin two-thirds of the
Dimmycratic party can't ate mate!"
VgRDIor on NEGRO Iseugsr, ,--"we de under.
scribed dqrkies, bein' Ksrnau,s jury OBJ disgust,
70 sit on de body OBJ de niggar Sambe, now ded and
gone before u.s. hab heen sittin' de sed Niger
aforesed, did, on do night oh de fustsenth OF Now
ember, cum to hiE def by falln frum de bridge oh
da riber, whar we ind he was Bubsecomely drown'd
and arterward washed on do riher side, whar, Ws
'sposs, he froze to def" s4 .eeh
Youka AxeRrcA.- Tine following specimen Of
Young Aniericanisln we think is too good 10 be
One night Freddy had boon put to, bed, and
mother and Johnny were in adjoining rsom.-
presently johnny cut up s3ne caper, which moth
or threatenedto take him into the other room and
whip hini.sa 1eife. ~ s'itilE Fs8 y
',Mother, said Freddy's voice under the bed
clothes ~ know where I'd take him.
"Where2p said mother whose curiosity was OK
cited gfa efa . sst tfsi q -l57l- = ~ BOZ
~ al ID take him under the left ear !"
AFFEcrING REMossrRANcE.-A gentle Down
castor lately essaying to appropriate a square
of exceedingly tough beef at dinner In a Wisconsin
hotel. His eonvulsiye efforts with a knife and fork
attrnctad the ai La of tha rasl In the same nsrdna