Volcano weekly ledger., 1856-08-23
SATISFACTION.

the saloon OF one OF our most respectable
clubs, frcquented by opuent merchants, coun-
try squires, bankers, and lords, with a sprink-
ling Of naval and military gentlemen.
Sir, | will have satisfaction" so saying,
and bnttoning up his military surtout with the
air of man who has determined on some
desperate course, the offended hero vanished
out Of the room. He was Immediately OBJ
served to mount handsome phaeton. drawn
by pair Of smart greys. His tiger eaped
up behind, and the equipage drove Off with
furious clatter up ST. James's street.
Satisfactonp OF course every one
within hearing knows the meaning Of the
words when uttered by nan of honor and
gentleman" In fashionable circles "satisfac-
ton means the chance Of projecting an ounce
Of lead in the shape of bullet into some Of
Tending friends body; but the man of wounded
honor is equally satisfied" if bis friend sends
the bullet into his own head and If his head
resists it, then he may thank the thickness
of his skull rather than the soundness of his
brain. Two men of honor fall out about the
most triling matter, perhaps, inilamed with
wine, begin to talk angriy, and one of them
uses an offensive word; instantly the other
call them fools rather-come out in the
cool grey Of the next morning with two other
friends" equally foolish, and then, in some
chalk pit or ravine, each sets himself up as a
target for the other Two bullets instantly
speed upon their fools errand. They miss
Well! the two seconds step up" interfere
to prevent further hostilitics, "-declaring
that their friends "honor is satisfied and
they march off to breakfast, thinking they
have done some valiant feat; o., the balls hit
their mark one, if not both, lie on the grass;
bullet has lodged in the spine of one, and
another bullet in the shoulder joint of the
other Forth steps a wiry man with a box
of implements, devised for the cutting out,
extracting, or wrenching away of the little
bullets from flesh and bone. ALL with one
Of them it is too late; he lies on the grass
breathless, his lips apart, his eyes glazed--hc
is dead; le has had his desire" the satisfac-
ton of a gentleman" The other after sub
mitting to the tortures of bullet extraction,
is borne from the field on a litter, " satisfied"
he has "kilIed lis man." Such is honor"
in the mouths of fools
But we must return to our story. Scarcely
had the gentleman of wounded honor rushed
out of the house, ere the friends of The other
assembled round him to ask What is the
matter? And how did you fall out?'
1.-The matter" said the offending gentle
man, who sat somewhat stupefed at the alb
runt and threatening eyit of his military
irlend why the fellow is as irascibie as
turkey cock We fell into dispute about
politics, about which he knows positively
nothing. He became more and more inso-
lent and his arguments were at length so
absurd that | could not help bursting out
laughing, and telling him that he was a bul-
letheadcd fool
" Is that all?" said city merchant; why
everybody knew that long agol"
Aye, but to tell him of it,
considerable damp seemed to have been
thrown upon the spirits Of all the company.
and the circle gradually broke up The gen
tleman who had been the cause of the explo-
sion at length rose and went home, not over
free from anxiety. lie now regretted the
use of the offensive word, and yet he felt that
it had not been undeserved Not being
military ran--for he was banker in good
business, and with extensive connexons-he
could scarcely divine what the other would
do in reference to the satisfaction" which he
had spoken of; yet he had some unpleasant
misgivngs about the issue.
The banker was not left long in doubt
Next morning, after an anxious night a
laundering rat-tat came to his door. 1mme-
diately thereafter gentleman was admitted.
The banker rose up to meet him, and recog-
nised him for military gentleman-in fact,
the major of the others corps
j have the honor" said he, "of waiting
upon you at the instance of my friend, the
Honorable Captain Sir Eustace Fitz- Giles;
this letter will explain to you the object of
my visit"
The banker opened the missive 1t was
written in thunder and tightening hand, and
smelt frightfully of gunpowder. In fact,
there was no misunderstanding it.
81 will call upon the captain said the
banker. q | will do so at once"
The usual mode in such matters. as
you are aware is to refer me to your friend"
In good time, sir" answered the banker,
but first would see the captain himself"
Very well" said the major; but the
usual course in such matters"
Yes, ycs!" said the banker, Il knoN;
but wish to see the captain himself'
He will refer you to me'
Very WE'LL then | shall have the pleasure
of seeing you again." and he bowed the ma
jor politely out.
The banker went Straightway to the choleric
captain Sir" said he to him, am not
at all ashamed to confess myself in the wrong
in having used towards you the expression
which has given you offence beg to with