Butte record., 1856-03-15

an find out.
AioRAL.-Never hire man to lie
unless You wish to get cheated your
.4ljany Police Tribune.
What we all dc.
An amusing and even instructive
hour may be spent, if one Will but
search out from the confused figures Of
the census the number of persons follow
various occupations in the u. States.
thus we reduce, as ma ton, in hay-
ing two thousand persons who pro
nounce themselves artists, though there
are probably not a score who live in
mems memories, and certainly not
one who appears likely to dethrono
Raphael. OF authors we have, accor-
ding to the census, only eighty-two;that
is, but eighty-two are willing to confess
to genius and a garrett" though, if
publishers advertisements are to be
credited, every new month gives birth
to literary star, and one more bril-
liant than any that ever went before.
To pass to bank officers and brokers'
Is natural transition, and of the for
NERVE are favored with fourteen hun
dred; Of the latter with six thousand,
exemplifying the old adage, that it ne
yerrains, but pours," and that bles-
sings never come single" Luckily,
there are hundred thousand honest,
stout hearted blacksmiths, as make
weight against this Egyptian plague of
flies, in the shape of brokers, and thus
revenge the community, which is so
essentially Shaved by the latter.
We have two millions and-a-half Of
farmers, seventy thousand mariners,
sixty four thousand masons, and nearly
two hundred thousand carpenters. We
have fourteen thousand bakers to make
our bread; twenty four thousand law
yers to set us by the ears; forty thou
sand doctors to ''kill or cure" and ff-
teen hundred editors to keep this mot
ley mass in order, by the potent pow
/ er of public opinion, controlled and
manufactured through the press. We
have eleven thousand hatters, ten thou
sand tobacconists, and thirty-one thou
sand weayers. Against thirty thou
sand teachers we can set off fifty thou
sand tailors, so that we care nearly
twice as much for adorning the body
that we do for decking out the mind.
Only twenty-five thousand people
bave been willing to set themselves
down as servants, though most Of US
serve others in some capacity or other,
from the boot-black, who polishes our
shoes, to the bookseller who brightens
public intellect. Nobody, according
to the census, follows the trade Of po-
litician, though there are enough, hea-
ven knows, in this city alone, to have
condemned dozen Sodoms and Go
morrahs. The census fails to record,
likewise, the existence Of any patriots
among US though we have long thought
that patriotism was especially pro
fession-a profession and nothing
else.
The forty thousand physicians sup
port five hundred undertakers, which
give the important statistical fact that
it takes eighty doctors to keep one I'M
dertaker in brief business, We have
fifteen hundred wagon makers, three
thousand watch-makers, seventy eight
vinegar makers, including we suppose,
all the cross wives, crusty bachelors,
and yerjuice old maids; thirty thou
sand wheelwrights, and thirty y-three
showmen. We have four thousand
cutters; twenty-three thousand sad
dlers; and five thousand railroad
men, We have one hundred and
fifty four opticians and ten oculists,
but nearly four thousand confcction-
ers, proving that we care infinitely
more for eating than for eycsight.-
This reminds us that there are five
thousand brewers and seven hundred
wine dealers; but the census, strange
to say, is silent as to the number who
drink the beer and ''quaff the rosy"
In all we have about five millions and
half, above the age Of fifteen years
who are busily employed at some trade,
profession or other occupation, by
which to earn a livelyhood. 1t is plain
that We nearly all do something. Nay
to be an idle drone, Is happily no re-
commendation in America, as it IS in
the aristocratic and monarchical coun-
tries Of Europe.-Pbd. Pub. Ledg.
t Persons will refrain from evil
speaking when persons will refrain
from evil hearing.