The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1856-1888, 1856-11-06
Ma. Ep1roR:
aSint unicuique sua premia.n

"SiBt unicuiQae suo premia."
Lever says IS when a man Stops to be kicked in
this world, he'll always find some kind friend ready
to oblige him with the compliment No sooner did
I stoop to vindicate my production from the aspersion
of rileness which the Rev. Mr.. Green so gratuitously
put upon it, than the hue andscry is started after me,
as if were some literary outlaw, some moral lepero;
and gents with names and nameless gents take up the
view-halloa in ~diapason fine. One, two, three two
leaders and o hunky set out " to do or de- and
make of me such an example to future evil-doers,
that none may dare to look askance at "non-resisting
pastors,' nor doubt their spirit of meek forbear-
snce."
at is the wit, the policy OF sin,
To hate those men we have abused.'
The s~taccato notes of Mr.. Green S fish horn sound the
reveilIe the roulade of Mr.. Bishop announces the
gathering, and Mr.. g Logic (the man in the mask,
the ANA de la maison, the volunteer in a private
quarrel performs the ouUerture de la chase on some
cracked s~yllogisms and spawned opinions.
And why this alarum?
ga defunct editor,'' a disbeliever in Missionary
politics and the three per cents of the Apostolic dires,
has dared to ' revisit the glimpses of the moon'' and
disturb the snugiy raked up ashes on the clerical
hearth. 'In cross it, though it blast me- says G (;
''let me not burst in ignorance says B " thou
contest In such a question: lie shape, that | will speak
to thee says Logic, and
"Unless these b X y r of eternal pains
care pardoned their bad hearts for their worse brains,"
no gentle spirit would ever stand q chance before
such ~clGqueurs Of an oft Kissed drama.
have battled against the political ascendancy of
the Missionaries, as inconsistent with their nobler and
holier functions-as tending to draw disgrace and
public contumely on a calling, which none can re-
spect more highly than myself when it is exercised in
eingleness of purpose and purity of heart-and as
proving invariably injurious to the moral and mate
rial interests Of the converts themselves. | combat
ted the errors of a class which 1 believed and still be-
lieve to be such, but I mercifully spared the individ-
uals and never yet put my foot on o mans conscience
nor my hand on his private life.
This was objectionable.
From that moment my picture was turned against
the wall of their imagination ; the public journals in
their interest were let loose upon me, and " Christian
pastors stood by with folded arms and approving
looks while my good name and moral character were
torn to shreds. "What is the use,' says Fowler, Fsof
painting moral pictures without we daub the shades
on thickly %
1t boots not now to recapitulate the strife ; their
bitter objurgations and their sore laments. "Time
at last sets all things event. They commenced a
descent (mGlgre, bongre) from the political ladder
though some still occupy the highest raund-andI re-
tired from the public life of a Journalist. They could
not forego, however, the opportunity of having q
parting fling at my expense and put their Ulse on my
passport. Mr.. g.. steps out of their serried ranks to
perform the agreeable duties of sexton, chorister and
priest to q Sc defunct editor 80 but, alas for the dig
nifty of the cloth he only verified the old adage, that
- quarrelsOme dogs get dirty coats.'' L admit that
in my reply to MI. G. l may have failed in my usual
urbanity, when 1 called him and his sc class of
writer's 6ig0ted, stripped and fallen, forgetting the
amphibious nature of their pursuits and the delicate
ground of their position-but men have sometimes
intuitive glances at the truth, and the sequel bore me
out in the assertion. Still from my soul [ regret
having occasioned so great a rumpus among such nice
people.
Ere Mr.. G., however, was aware of my re-appear-
ance, and his own wounds, the Rev. Mr.. B. with
breathless haste comes to the rescue and attempts to
cover me with a mantle of epithets more aromatic of
ST. Giles than of Andover. He took the tub of Diog-
enes for his model of literary architecture and, with
greater pride, he trampled on my own. If such their
weapons and their future play, there was no other re-
source left for a gentlemanly writer, than to quit the
game, though he forfeited the stakes and With my
best bow and my blandest smile L made my salaam, and
even offered my hand at parting. Not so, however.
The profered gage is thrown up and Mr.. Logic bars
the door.
Well be it So
"rhe hand Of Douglas is his own"
and now for the last conner.
Mr.. Logic has evidently not had the honor of
crossing pens with gentlemen, or he would not pre-
sumo to handy my name about while he withholds his
own. From his style 1 am strongly inclined to be-
Ieve him an enfant gate of the peripatetic school,
with a strong dash of wooden nutmegs in his ~constitu-
ton, looking for an opening to pitch in.
I give Mr.. L. all credit for not writing g q long
article The sample before me is quite enough to
convince the critical student that Mr.. L. did not re-
ceive { the honors'' at Cambridge or Harvard.
perhaps he had better try again at Punahou.
Mr.. L. will oblige me and remember that " the adj
vocating the use of Wine etc. has not yet been proved
cile, nor probably will it in his or my lifetime. As his
major term then is not a constant predicate, an adj
mitted truth, ergo Mr.. Green's opinion, as the minor
term, is not admissible before such strict logicians as
Dir. Logic and myself.
appreciate the full value of Mr.. LIS compliment
to my honesty. My companions are declared vile,
and my honesty is appealed to not to deny the con-
nection Have we an embryo Chesterfield or Count
d'Orsay among us?
wonder that Mr.. L. should make Mr.. Green's
confusion of mind dQDQTldant ln0O m or aa0et f0cf0
fact; and did he not tell me that his name was Logic,
I should be inclined to think his nom de plume but
another illustration of g lucus a non lucendo.''
Messieurs, I have now picked up your gauntlets
and am at your service. But if you would only put
the Ancients out of the room, there might be pleas
anter sparring and q better clang from the grey goose
quill.
Who plays next? A. FoRNANDER.
To the Editor of the P. C. Advertiser.
SIR lin your No. of Oct. 10th, it seems you are