The Ashland union. [volume] (Ashland, Ashland County, Ohio) 1854-1868, 1856-03-19

HOW ZEkE PhiLfOT GOT SUCKED
IN, AND THEN AeAIN HOW he DIDN'T.
Ezekiel Philpot was born in America,
somewhere heal the headwsters Of the
Penobscot. and when he arrived at the
age of nineteen be had got his growth
and out his eye teeth" q circumstance
which was generally admitted by all
wao knew him. One bright morning in
June. Zeke placed his long body in a
clean shirt, run his long legs through a
pair Of striped trowsers, wrapped a span
new waistcoat about his breast, hauled
up his stiff cotton dickey and tied q
checked gingham about his neck, and
then donned his swallow-tailed coat, the
brass buttons of which looked like a row
of newly arisen stars. Zeke was liter.
ally . pioneer in the "Bloomer cos
tune at least one would have thought
90 to see him rs he now stood. He dis
dained to have his trousers legs dang
ling in the mud, or to have the cuffs of
his coat stopping in the wash-bOwl; SO
his blue stockings peeped forth from be-
meath the tops of his coThides that look
ed up full six inches to the trowser bot
toms, while his bony wrists had free
scope from either shirt-sleeve or cuff.
Zeke's hair, which was no color in par
t~icular, but bore all the lighter shades
ofthe vegetable kingdom, was down fat
with pure bears lie, and directly on the
the top of his head he put a white hat,
somewhat resembling an inverted butter
fsrkin, and after gazing at his present
ment in the looking-glass for four and q
half minutes, was heard to say:
aThar, Mr.. Zeke Philpot, ifyou don't
slide on that, then I guess what amt
what, shafts all"
Zeke was bound for Boosting, with a
load of genuine apple.sass, and he ez-
pected, ere he returned, tomake a slight
~eommotion, if not more, in the great
metropolis. The old marc vas harness
ed, and in due course o time Zeke and
his load arrived in Bosting, where the
I" sass : was disposed OF to good advan-
tage, and with seventy-fve dollars in
his pocket, our hero began to look
aroznd to see the sights.
Hello !" exclaimed Zeke, as he stop
ped n morning before a blazing Pla-
card, which adorned one of the back
walls in Flag-alley; wat'n tarnation's
that? a Golden Ladder Road to
Tort-u-n-e-oh, fortin, that's ia road
20 fortin.n
Zeke went n to decipher the reading
beneath, and gradually he gained the
intelligence that on Back Bay there was
to be a pole twenty feet high, and on the
top Of which the proprietor would place
prize of 5000, to be obtained by any
one who could obtain it. Chances So.
" Well, tew hundred dollars is some
punkins." soliloquized Zeke. 1--WE
clumb some pooty skinny trees in my
day. III just walk into that fcller's
few hundred, rot me eff Ideon't.'
With this feeling of cupidity, Zeke
started for the scene of action, and twas
not till he had run down a dozen Of ap-
ple-Women that be remembered bis en-
tire ignorance of where Black Bay might
be, and when this information was gain
ed, he appeared to remember that the
sold mare " hadn't been seen to.
Zeke was economical in his horse
keeping. he hired a single stall in q
small shed near the Providence depot,
bought his own hay, and took care of
bis own animal. Thither he hastcned
bis steps, aud having watered and fed
his beast, he took from his wagon-b box
10 old Bool-card and raked down the
mare in the most approved manner. 70
u sure the steel teeth moved a little
more harshly over the bones than usual.
but then Zeke was III a hurry, for that
" lew hundred " wal in his eye.
At length, by dint of much inquiry,
Or. Ezekiel Philpo found his way to the
spot where the people had already be.
gun to collect around the Golden Lad
dsrz1
eHel-iop exclaimed zeko, as be
same up, "Whar's the chap wos keeps
his ere pole ?n |,
CT am the man, answered a burly
with a red pose and a pimpled
shih, who occupied . chair near the pole.
Want to try . chance Walk up, +,
gentlemen, Walkup-only three dollarsl 9
Who wants the two hundred ?"
hold Cd, ole f~eller," interrupted
seko Nsdew yer mean to say as heow L
tew hundred dollars in that 'ere b
upt' the top o. that pole 2" b
~Gertainly." t