Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1856-02-15
| Night with the Know-NothIngs; or, Uncle Jake's
Experience.
BY HIS NEPHEW.

give reason for the faith that was in him-he has
alters been looked up to sort of oracle in perlitl
cal matters and the history of the United States
Bank and its oru nquities, the tariff and its oppres
sors the distribution of the publick lands and all
them the old Wings used to try to fix on the
people so hard In fact, Uncle Jake was dimicrat
from the top of his he'd to the sole Of his feet and
from size all thro to the other and Aunt Nancy,
his wife, was just as rembunctious on the subject as
himself, only little more so.
Now, Mr. Eastman, don't like to expose Uncle
Jake, but the thing is so good, P have to tell you all
about it,
Last summer thar cum into our settlement nice
young man, sent out, as larnt from your place to
make No.Nothins, but he didn't let all what
be cum for at fust. Howsomever he linked in quite
q lot on 'em, principally Wings, and larnt that sum
on 'em intended tryin thar hands on Uncle Jake
Thinks |, old feers, you'll be baTkn up the rong
tree, sertin. but the fus thing noed they got hold
of the old man, treated him. told him that the dimi
Gratis all jinn' on 'em-that it warnt no Whlg
trick, nor nuhin' of that sort--that the Pope OF
roam was a cumin here 10 use up our government,
to make preests of all the boys an nuns OF all the
gas-that all the other denominations wud have to
in an wear crosses an kiss the Popes big toe
that the No-Nothins gon to stop all these evil
things-gon' to regenerate the land an BRING things
back 10 the days of Giner Jackson-that Gov. Jack
sons folks war all fur em, tooth an toe nail, an
what with one thing an another, the fust thing I'm.
Gle Jake noed he a regar rlngtailed No-Nuthin.
They dun the ole at mite an arter 1t was all over
he started hum, an as he went along his mind was
full of msgivns, how cud he face the ole oman g
What wud Ginral Jackson say if he was alive How
cud he meet his old Dmicratic trends ag i'm an he
suddenly recollected that The Union (the old watch
man on the tower of Perlitical Zion, as he used
to cell your paper) was opposed to 1t. All these
things begin work in Uncle Jake's mind, till by the
time he got home he was in powerful swlvet.
He found Aunt Nancy sitting up fur him. an
Unkle Jakes he never was ashamed to meet fore
"Well Jake, ses she, what on yearth has kept
.bt Tp1yl Tolyo
regular in his habits.
'Wy Nancy, been round-atendin' meetln
to-ne," ses he, quite hesitatin like.
What kind Nv meetin,' ses she.
"Wy-a sort parlitical meetn," ses he, shIv-
erin all over, fur he was powerful Uneasy by this
time.
Well" ses she g if you've been tryin to he'd
these o-nuthns ant got no more to say, tur you
couldn't be in better bsiness, fur leyn that sum as
call themselves dimicrats, have jined 'em. | don't
like 'em no how, Jake, for they don't cum out open
and above board but pokin round at mite in alleys
and d. ark nnces; Ut thu, thc lord you aint wun
of 'em, fur no couldn't live with on EN- TO
save my life. But what makes you look so Jacob!
are you sick Bless my life if you aint got chill
on you, and your hands as cold as ice. What's the
matter, Jake y
"Nuthin much," ses Unke Jake, 81 dol't feel
very well to-nite, ole oman, Hll 60 TO bed,' so
sayin he spt into bed, and the ole oman arer him.
Blmeby Unkle Jake, arter tossn and r0lln about,
gifts to sleep, and dremt that all his Dmicrat friends
he used to be with SO much wouldn't have nuthin to
do with him, and that he couldn't longer vote his
old ticket, for his old friends and his old principles,
and he greaned in spirit.
Aunt Nancy walked him, up, skeered to deth, an
Unkle Jake had to out with the hole thing Aunt
Nancy jumped out Nv bed and declared she couldn't
stay thar that nonuthun couldn't cum nigh her
Unke Jake at last told her ef she would forgive him.
he'd go early in the mornin and git out of the thing
but she told him no, she couldn't stand him till
mornin and directly Unke Jake hauls on his close,
and went out and got the President and sum more on
'em together swore he must git out afore mornn
or kill sum body one. They let him out-and when
he got loose, he sung, he shouted he danced and ca
pered like boy-he run home and like 10 a squeez-
ed Aunt Nancy 10 deth; she, good old soul, was mi
ly riled about it powerfully distressed but sealed
his pardon with kiss of fOrg Veness an let by cones
be by-gones.
One man soon arter limited 10 Unkle Jake that he
heerd he no-nuthn, when he pitched into the
feller an like to waloped him to deth since that
time nobody has accused Uncle Jake of being a
no-nuhn.- Vtcksburg Sentinel
Census of massachusetts and North Carolina.
We think every sensible man in Massachusetts,
after comparing the census OF his State with
that of North Carolina whether he be actuated by
selfish policy or enlarged philanthropy, will arise
from the comparison warm friend of the Union as
it is. The statistics, which We shall cite, might, of
themselves, induce the belief that the Bay State was
only productive of criminals and paupers. But it is
well known, that, despite of her fanaticsIn, she is
wealthy, enlightened, industrious and energetic
Her commerce and manufactures supply her with the
products of agriculture. Disunion would cripple
those resources, and probably expel her industry,
skill and capital to better markets and congo
NAL cmes. The population OF Massachusetts in
1850 was Tin round numbers) Million that of North
Carolina eight hundred and seventy thousand Mas
sachusetts produced thirtyone thousand bushels of
wheat two millions three hundred and forty.f five
thousand bushels of Indian corn. and three million
five hundred and eightyfVe thousand bushels of po-
tatoes-eighty thousand hogs, foytytwo thousand
| horses and mules, and two hundred and sxty-thou-
sand cattle. The productions OF North Carolina, in
proportion 10 population, were about ten times as
great They produced two millions one hundred and
thirty thousand bushels of wheat, twenty mil
ton bushels Indian corn, five million seven hundred
thousand bushels potatoes million eight hundred
thousand hogs one hundred and seventyf -four thou
sand horses and mules and six hundred and ninety
three thousand cattle. What field she exhibits for
| Massachusetts commerce aud manufactures Yet
she would fare better in case of dsunion than Mas
sachusets-for she produces all the necessares of
life and might produce its luxures within herself
The statistics of crime and pauperism exhibit quite
as startling difference in favor of North Carolina
and prove that she and does attend the moral and
physical condition OF her people, and needs foreign
prompting or interference. Before quoting those
tistics would remark, that fuel, so dear and SO
much needed in Massachusetts, is at every mans
door in North Carolina, without money, and with
out price-for there few towns in that State. In
Massachusetts, in 1850, there fifteen thousand
seven hundred paupers; in North Carolina, one thou
sand nine hundred. In Massachusetts, criminals con-
victed in 1850, seven thousand in North Carolina,
six hundred In prisons, in Massachusetts, one thou
sand; In North Carolina, forty four. In iails, in
Massachusetts, one thousand in North Carolina,
thrty-tour. In Penitentares in Massachusetts, four