The Athens post. [volume] (Athens, Tenn.) 1848-1917, 1856-01-25
VOL. V1II.--N0. 1888.
CALIFORNIA HUMORS.

| We select from Hhenixiana-a volume OF
most fatal and irresistible fun, few samples
and passages of life in California, which may
be interesting to many readers. We begin
with the Inauguration of the New Collector"
and append few specimens of the epistolary
favors received by that important parsonage.
1t will be seen that there Is "a great deal Of
human nature in men, even in California.
LETTERS TO THE NEW COLLECTOR.
| . u. I'LL -. MOL
"My Dear Friend Il presume YOU wifi be
perfectly surrounded this morning, as usval.
by a crowd of heartless officcsseekers. 1
therefore take this method of addressing Won.
thank God want no office for myself or
others. You have known me for years, and
have never known me 10 do mean or dis.
honorable action. | saw W up. at
Stockton the other day, and he is very anxious
that should be appointed Inspector of
steamboats,. lie said that Fneeded il, md
deserved IL, and that he hup-d yon wonld give
it to me; but told him ! was no office seeker
II should never ask you for any office. He
said he would write 20 you about it. Please
write tp me as soon as you receive this, care
of Parry &, Batten.
"Your affectionate friend"
up. S.-My friend John Smith, who YOU
know is true Pierce and King man, is
anxious to get the appointment of Weigher
and Guagcr of Maccaroni. He is an excellent
fellow, and true friend of yours. hope,
whether you can spare an Inspectorship for
me or not you viii give Smith chance.
NO. II.
My Dear Sir:-Allow me TO congratulate
you on your success in obtaining your wishes
! nave called twice to see you, but have not
been able to find you in. You were kind
enough TO assure me, before leaving for
Washington, that might depend upon your
friendship. think it very improbable that I
shall be rc-nominntcd. The waterfront Ex.
tension project has not been received with
that favor that expected, and what with
Roman and the Wings and that id Her.
aid, feel very doubtful. You will oblipe me
by retaining in your possession, until after the
Convention, the office of - to the Custom
House. ! must look about me to command
the means of subsistence will see you again
on this subject. Very truly yours.
"P. S.-My young friend, Mr.. John Brown,
wishes to be made Inspector of Vermicelli.-
tie is pure Democrat dyed in the wool, and
trust in making your appointment YOU will
not overlook his claims. Brown tells me he
considers himself almost relative Of yours.
ms aunt used to 60 to school with your
father. She frequently writes to him, and
always speaks Of you with great esteem.
NO. III.
"Mon Amie:-I ave been yer malade since
that hay arrive, yer muche thank YOU for
YOU ciyite on la vapor which we come lei.
Jnntos The peoples here do say to me, you
81 pued give TO me The lttel offices in your
customs house. wish it 81 usted GUSTAV YOU
me shall make TO be Inspectors de cirarritos,
Je ! entends muy bien. Come to me see.
Counties de-
| sinister Jose Jones he say wish TO be entree
clerky. You mueho me obige by make him
dc it.
| NO.
"The following was evidently dictated by
some bcIligercnt old Democrat to an aman.
uensis, who appears not to have got precisely
the ideas intended:
"SIR:-l have been II dimocrat of the Jack.
son School thank God for twenty years II
you sir had been erected to an oriiice by the
pusilanimons sullerings of the people as |
was onst would have no clam but sir YOU
are appointed by Pierce for whom voted and
King who is dead us Jnlia's sister and ey-
pectorate the office for which my friends will
ask you sir am plane man and wont the
oriticc of Prover and taser of Brandy and
wish you write to me at the Mantle where
sick three days and have TO write by younp
gentleman or come to see me before eleven
o'clock when generally get sick. Yours.
| VI. S.-My young man mr., Peter Stokes