Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1856-04-05
MISCELLANY.
THE WHY'S AND WHEREFORE
OR, WHO'S TO BLAMEi

lilOh NV ANaNhhl hfNANiS Vs.
Why do we pinch our feet in tight slippers,
or wear thin CATERS 10 warm weather Ia
please The gents, to be sure What girl has
not heard her uncle, brother male-cOusin, nav,
even her father, speak in rapiures Of small feet
and laugh at large ones Can they blame us
then, if we sacrifice comfort, and even health,
10 please theml 1t is neither pleasant MOI
comfortable for US TO walk over rough places
with tight, thin shoes on neither is il pleasant
feet" And SO, Of two evils, we choose the
least
Why do we sit in the parlor to entertain the
beaux, while our mammals toll in the kitchen
Verify because these same beaux prefer on
company to our mammas. II we left them, and
sent ia "our elders and beiters," the beaux
would leave instanter, ADD spread the report,
far and wide, that we wera crude, quite unfit
ted for society, uncivil," &C., &c. All, yon
lille know how we have 10 jump round, TO make
up for lost time. after you have bowed your
selves out.
Why do we attend winter parties clad in thin
clothes, with arms and neck bare
Why Because we often hear gentlemen
speak Of other girls looking "as if they were
choked with their dresses tight around their
Threats - or, such ones dress "was more
suitable for funeral than an evening party
How, again, they will go into ecstacies over the
gossamer drapery fsome city BELLE and praise
her 'alabaster shoulders and perfect arms"
After all this, can we be expected to wear
thick, dark dresses, You would not wish us
TO. Then why blame usl
Why do we load our selves with so much
clothing in warm weather
All, there it is again. Now, tell me candid.
ly who among you would be willing 10 invite
TO picnic any girl who looked, as you term il
'like bean pole, all one size from head to
heelslr
Don't we hear you ravine about well-turned
figures Do you suppose we love 10 wear all
this amount Of cotton Not at all but we do
not like TO be neglected, aud called dowdies, so
we take the burden upon US all for your sake
Why do we mince at table, and scarcely eat
enough 10 keep bird alvel Did not Byron
hate to see woman eat, aud do you not quote
Byron 10 US, and watch every mouihiul we eatl
only wish you could see us at tho cupboard
when we get sly chance We do not live ON
"
"''' ny any uieahS on no you VIII md that
VI, ~ ''''e'
why arc we not always IN readiness TO re-
cei'c calls nave yon YET to learn that dress
Is AL put on ana 'ha' we must have some time
'" arrange "ha' II we do keep you waiting
" Few mnu'es' when you cav at uHsssPonaole
huu,S' are we not making all me haste We can
WINE you are pacing lhe parlor like Gagged
pears "e,haVe one dress to nnhook, and an
"'ner 10 NOOK up, making aooni my of those
uouoiesome niue ias'eninss to deal with. (fon
cant think what bother you are) Then we
'nuS, 'a"e inc papers IRON our hair, or you
"ou'u Ue no'r'ned' gu all admire rlnglets,
a"u 10 oou'' you ',iink mat lhey should al
ways aa"g ~ gruceiui' SHINING clusters, sleeping
VI waNing, Always IN order' needing no attention
oNsep' d genie loss OF The head" as novel
Nineis 'eil you hu, let me tell you curs are
nv "Aeu 'ac's' ihey are more trouble than
a'' we rest Oh our tolei. For sometimes even
your 'ehoeres' notes iaii to give Them ihe'rght
rs ~ you auh',e cu''s' you should never
W u,s"'9"eu a' cur papers.
10y W we over run IKE frightened deer