Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1856-07-09
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TRIALS OF AN EDITOR.


How often We think, when reading the news,
An editor could please IL he choose
but such . paper as this, Why all must agree
Thar q thing Of less interest they never did see.
But, Sir critic. reflect ere you make a noise on,
That one mans meat is another mans poison;
Aud. lest you persist in your steadydeniais,
Wen give you a few Of an editors trials
First pretty young lady. s~prightly and fair,
VITA a paper in hand, waltxes up TO a chair,
And hastily gIancirg Ger an that she saw,
No marriages here
Z, 1 think It Is qreer,
When there's ever so many,
They don't publish any.
And tales And law suits,
Without ending, A~pending,
But no pienics. or parties. or concerts for me-
snca trash on paper l never dd sse-
Then. a nice young man. with a cane and mOustaehe
Who certainly thinks he is cutting a dash,
Looks over the list Of plays and soirees,
IL yasnly tying his fancy to please,
circuses, And ehases,
Operas, In banquets,
Balls. And calls,
And finely wonders what editors mean,
By printing q paper not cit to be seen
Sentimental yoeng lady next picks M the paper,
And reads by the light of a dim burning taper,
And wonders II lines here addressed to Miss RelIa
We're not written TO her by some clever young fellow,
Who's pretty and witty. and learned and wise
But she stops in alarm at the =" dark hazel eyes,"
For hers are deep blue,
What a pity It's true,
For now Mr.. Editor,
lis all blamed on you.
What speeches, And having,
And sermons. And iawing.
And news, And clawing,
By dispatch. To match,
But no sketches or tales that 1 can see
What kind OF u man must the editor be
Next. a grave politician who with dignity glows,
Adjusts his gold spectacles over his nose,
Takes a huge pinch of snuff before he proceeds,
Then opens the paper and leisurly reads
And speeches, Of house.
And foreign OF railways
Reports And courts,
And says, as he reads the last column Of war.
What a strange kind Of people these editors are,
These rhymes and these love stories to print,
IL fgould do any good l would give them a hint.
Nov, a prin old maid the paper espies.
And holding it carefully OF from her eyes.
And frequently muttering a. la ! and du tell"
she manages soneway TO read very we'll
The marriages, The roberies,
Accidents, And murders,
Suicides, Alin
Deaths, A breath,
And finishing. wonders what sort Of a blundcr,
The whole OF the community is under.
To support paper whose print is so small,
She wonders how some people read It an
Next. an angry contributor. eager for faue,
I'm ruined. sir ruined-my success, sir, is Ger,
So many mistakes was ne'er heard Of before;
Look here. al this -Scnnet Addressed to my Lady"
You've made ii "A Bonnet and Dress for a Baby"
Don't talk Of my writing. and say it WIS that
You're an editor, sirsbatne sent-thats nat
The farmers complain That his crops are neglected,
While SO much time is spent guessing who'll be Sc
lected-
The minister says IL should he more sedate.
And not so much wasted on matter Of state:
And thousands Of other complaints are made known,
Which the editors back has TO bear all alone
But the worst of it is. they all join in saying
Such . paper as this he can print without paying.