Semi-weekly standard. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1853-18??, 1856-06-28
s. :. 5sz,,as 81, For the Standard.
AFTER THE IS BOYs.,,..

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.5s :. .s..sy For the Standard &
1, @ AFTER THE ssBOYs.',.
MEsRs EDroRs 4 Il seems that the Register has
been given up to the boys The Register is an ans
cient sheet now in its dotage and is verifying the
old adage of once man and twice p child !" With
the imbecile affection with which old man takes
to his bosom his pratlng grandchildren and great
grandchildren cinging to and caressng them, while
mature manhood and sound reason ere unsuited to
both his taste and his comprehension, the Register
hugs to its embrace the harmless small fry of anx-
ious seekers after the glories of the quill.
am not much in the habit of dealing in small
matters but sometimes like play with little things,
just as
"a little nonsense, now and then, -
Is relished by the wisest mem"
and moreover having tender regard for these very
tender headed youths, and remembering that the
wise man says "spare the rod and spoil the child,
and not wishing to do any such thing, shall not
spare the roo and beg my young friends to
feet, they writhe under its smart, that it is for
their good-that apply the lash not in wrath but
in mercy. Boys, you had better suffer little now
while your flesh is fresh and will quickly heal
than to postpone ituntil manhood Experience
keeps dear school but fools will learn in other"
and hardly in that. Youth can be excused for
indiscretions that would condemn manhood and it
is better to have your ndscretions corrected in boy
hood than to feel their consequences in mature age.
Youth is proverbial for its ndiscreetness, and the
young mind for the exuberahce of its fancy. To
these causes, boys, ], in much charity, attribute
your many deviatons from truth, your too high col
oring of facts, and your total want of fairness and
sincerity. Pardon me for recommending you ALL
collectively, to an old book, no doubt often recon-
mended to you by your parents, called the Bible;
and especially to the Proverbs of Solomon. 1t is
plain from your recent efforts that you have neglec-
ted this book, or read it only to condemnation. "a
foolish is grief to his father, and bitterness to
her that bare him." Then, boys, for the sake of
your parents to prosecute the foolish course
you have been pursuing. "Get wisdom, get under:
standing" and then show your hands wisely and
discreetly and as first step towards wisdom you
must learn that you are now I" fools in the sense
of that word as it is used by Solomon. Boys who
attempt to make sport OF men only make themselves
ridiculous. Excuse me for calling you boys 1
know the race is nearly extinct and that breeches
and manhood are to you SYNONYMOUS terms. Better
to have your breeches too big for you, than for you
to be too big for your breeches In the latter case
your nakedness will somewhere show itself, and an
indecent part is most likely to be revealed Such
has already been the case with you. Boys think
old folks are fools, but old folks kaow boys to be
SUCH"
So much by way of generalizing- for taking
First, we have -" Observer" very modest youth,
and extremely sy-has thoughts of one day taking
holy ORDERS and is therefore very studious and ex
tremely observing. Blu: his studies seem to be con-
fined mostly to politics. and his observations to pol.
ticians. Perhaps he may become Brownlow
Beccher, and while he takes text in the Bible, will
preach politics. Sonny, you are very young, and
your indiscretion rather exceeds your youth. /" Be
not pulled up with vain imaginings." You yet have
much to learn, and one material item is, not to at
tempt to explain matters or preach on subjects of
which you know nothing. Yours is yet small boat,
and you should keep near shore. As yet your pen
can do no good and the pen that can do no good is
too insignificant to do harm, hurt any one
Your shafts fall harmless at the feet of thuse against
whom you aim them; and the cause you would fur
ther, receives no benefit. Read your Bible; use
your pen if you choose, but lay aside your lucubra
tons until you reach manhood and my word for it,
you will then burn them and thank me for this ad-
vice. Observe all you can, but hoard your observa
tons until you get stock ON hand, and then use
them only as occasion requires. Don't make fool
of yourself any more, and don't quite sneakng.
Next comes "Bobbing Around" very brilliant,
a highly poetical, extremely polished, and
ceedingly wise writer-in his own estimation
" Uncle Shem has given you good advice, my boy;
and hoping that you are profiting by it, shall deal
gently with you. Don't be too eager for fame. 1t
will come unsought whenever you deseTceit. When
you write what you think good thing, don't run
all over town to show it to everybody. This will
get you notoriety, which is an article in TO wise
sembling glory. Show it to some discreet and in
telligent friend let him point out its beauties and
defects; and thus you may improve, unit! you be-
come something. You have some genlus as . wri-
ter and it is pity you found it out 1t has
nearly spoiled you. Danish your vanity, and keep
out Of politics until you understand it, and you may
yet be renowned in the world of letters.
And now for carter Locos." Well, he's a small
huntsman to be "artcr,' Ito use his own African
dialect) such big game l believe he is Doctor
Then, though small in size, he must be rather be-
yond boyhood in years, but in nothing else. Con-
shall deal with him as boy; and con-
sidering he ought not now to be boy, shall ap-
ply the rod vigorously, but not vengefuly. My son,
it is for your own good. 1t pains me to infict the
but duty >compes mo to it You have
heard it said that "from the sublime to the ridcu-
ous is but STEP" and you illustrate the fact
you are living monument Of its truth. All imita-
tors take this step, and in your efforts to initiate
" Doesticks" you stick fast in the dough of rdcu-
ousness. You should vomit your patients with
your drugs. and not with your literary ucubrations.
The latter as etcacious, but they more naus
eating Or if you will persist in giving them emet-
les OF this kind let me eatreat you, in'the name of
humanity, to adopt the Homeopathic practice. Re-
member that Misrepresentation is not wit, foolish
ness is not humor, and epithets do not constitute
argument If you desire fools to work upon, you
have only to let the "Locos" alone and practice
your profession Rest assured that you will then
have other kind of subjects for the exercise of
genius. Your pen will never kill "Loco your
fear nothing but your drugs. Mend
your ways, my son, and read diligently the Proverbs
IF Solomon.
Lastly, we come to "Snooks," who, in his very
name, carries the idea of something low doson.- 4
O. -1.-N .1t- Ill 80 I-1C