True American. [volume] (Steubenville [Ohio]) 1855-1861, 1856-01-30
GFRoM THg WIDOWS BGDorT PAPERS" !"
THE UNEXPECTED PROPOSAL.

Mr., CRANE-'WelI. widder, I've been
thinking about lakidg another companion
land | thought I'd ask you--'
WiDow--Oh, Mr.. Crane, egscuse my
commandments SO unexpected. Jest
Hand me that are hottie o'camfre of the
manllelry sheIf-Im srather f4int-dew
PIT little mite Oil py handkerchief and
hpId il 10 my nus. here--lhat'll dew
I'm ub!eeged lew ye--nowI'm u'her
more comp"sed--you may ptrceed, Mr..
Crane
Mr.: C.-"Well, widder, | was going
to ask you whether-whelher- -
WIDJw--'Coninner. Mr. Crane. dew
| know it's iulrible embarrasin.' | fe-
member when my dezeazed husband made
his supposi,ions 10 NE, he s,ammered and
stuleIed, aud was so awfuIy luslered, it
did seem as il he'd never get it oul in the
wor d, and .s'pose'il's generally the case,
AT least it has been with ihemlhat's made
suggestions 10 me, YOU see,hey're gin.
rrafv concerIing about what kind of an
swer they're gwlne TO gil, and it kind o
makes 'ein narv0us. Bul when an indi.
vddivsl has reason 10 s'spose his attach
menl's recproca,ed, | don't see what need
there is . bein' frustrated tho I must
say It's qnile cnbarassin' to me pray
ruu,inner.'
MIR. C--.Well. then, I want to know
If You're willing should have MESSY ,
WlDow--The dragon y
Mr.. C.-'l haiu't said anything to he
about it.yet--ihough, the proper way wa!
to get your consent first. remembe
when cour,ed Trypheny. we were Ell
gdged spple lime before mother Kenipt
knew All, thing about il, and when sh.
found ii out she Was quile put uu, because
did not gp',u her first. Sn when made
up my ani'id about Meissy, thinks me-
I'll dew it right 'hiy time and speak ID
the old woman hrsl--''
WlDow-'0ld woman, hev that's a
rurly name To call me = amazln' per,ile
lew Want Melissy, hey Tribblea.
linn! gracious sakes alive! well, Ill give
mp now! Ialyays knowe'd you was /;
simrlttnn, Tim Crane, bul | must confess
] didn't think YOU was quite so big a foo
-want Melissy. dew We! If tlla, don
beat all what an eyerla>lin' old calf yor
must be I" s'p Sc she'd look a, you.--
Why. you're Old enough 10 be her faith
er, and more -Melissy ain'l only il
her lwtnly-cne,l year. What reedick
ilous idea far a man % yonr age! as gray
as rat tew ! wonder what this worlt
is comin' lew; lis asionishin' what fool.
old Middiwers will make % themselves !
Have Mtlissy !! = Meli+syr
Mr.. C--'Why. widdrr y"u surprise
ne : l,dnp idr of being treated in ,hi'
way after you'd been so perite 10 me
and made such a fuss over me and lht
ghls.' 3
/ Wow Shot your head, Tim Crane
nun o. yer sas 10 me. There's your ha
ON that are table, and here's the door
and lhe soontr ynu put on one and marcl
ont q tn,her, The better I'LL be for you.-
And advise you afore You Try TO &c
married again, 10 GO out west and see
Eyer wife's roll--ard artrr ye're saiis6el
on ,ba, pint. j4sl ppt a,leelle lampblacl
on yer hail. 'lwould add 10 your appear
ance undoubtedly and he'of saryice lev
/ you when you wan. 10 flourish rom
among The gals and when we've gol ye
hair dxi, jest splinter The spine Of ye
back, 'twupid'ul hurt yer looks mite
you'd be entirely uuresisiahle if you. wa
1alptt'e grain straiter,
| Mr.. O.--'Well, | neyer!'
WIppw--.Hold yer tongue, you con
safned- old coot you, Iiell yon there
Eyour hat and there's the dppr--be off will
syerself, quick metre, or III giys W I
Ihysl with the broomslick:'
MR. c. Gimmeni!' gs&l
WlDpws RISING ~ Git oul, Isay--I ain
sgwin 10 sian here and be insulIed unde
myown rutland SO gel along, and i ev
,erypu dalkenmy ,lpol agin, orsay . wor
MeIissy, il'Il be woss for you that
IaU.N h
isMR. C.--.Treemenjousl What a. bus
Iierl' IA Sgp
NJ WIDow.-,Go long go 'longl! 6
thong ygu eyerlsssln' old gum Won