The Evansville daily journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ia. [i.e. Ind.]) 1848-1862, 1856-03-10
.CBe 9aiFg yo1rflia /,
THE OLD CLOCK.


Two Yankee waes, enc summer day,
Stopped at tavern their way,
And woke to breakfls! the best.
THE breakfast over Tom and VIII,
ISent for the landlord and the t:ll;
VIII looked ii over: VERY. Right
But hold! what wonder meets my sight.
I ON! the surprise is quite shock!''-
E''What wonder? where?'-''The clock! The clock"
Tom and the landlord in amaze
Stared at the clock in stupid gaze,
And for moment neither spoke;
At last the ladlord silence btoke--
.,You mean the clock that's ticking therer
see wonderI declare;
Though may ba. If the truth were told,
lis rather ugly--somewhat old;
4 Yet time it keeps to half minute;
But, il you pleas, what wonders in it?''
Tom, don't YOU reeollect," said VIII,
"ihe clock at Jersey near the mill,
The very image OF this present.
l With which won the wager pleasant"
! win ended with knowing wink
lTom scratched his head and tried 10 think.
ItSir, begging pardon for inqHirng.''
THE landlord "a d. with grin admiring,
I"What wager WAS it?''
.sYcH r,member
Il happened, Tom, in last December,
! N spctt bet Jersey Blue
That it vas more than Ee could do
| To make his finger osRd ccmc
Pin keeping with the pendulum,
/ iReruating.i iin one hour should close,
/ S-ili, Here She g0ss--aRG there she g0es!'
i He lost the be- in half minute"
well If I would. the deuce is in it?"
Exc AIMED the landlarl; TRY me yet.
1 ard fr dollars be the bet"
! agreed. but will play some trick
| To make you Of your bargain sick"
II'm up to thatF'
begin. The clock is striking eight
He steats himself, and left aud right
! His finger wags with all is n ight
And hoGrse his voice, aud hcarser grows,
Nith-'' Here she gces-CRd there she goes!"
Hold" said the Yanke plank the ready!'
1.-The landlord waeged his finger steady,
While his left hand, as well as able,
Conveyed the purse upon the table.
''Iom, with the money let's be OFF,
! his made TIE landlord only scof;
He hear them running down the stair,
But tempted from his chair;
Thought he. The fools! III bite them yeti
| Sc poor a trick shan't win the bet"
And loud and loud the chorus
| Of Here she gOes-Gnd the'e she gOes!"
While right and left his finger swung,
| In keeping to his clock and tongue
His mother happened in, to see
Her daughter; "where is Mrs. -?
When will she come, as you suppose?
'Hers size g0ss-ans there she gOestp
"Here?--where?'-t lady in surprise
His finger followed with her eyes;
''Son, why that steady gaze and sad?
Those woTds--that moton-are you mad?
But here's your wife--pehaps she knows
AND
"Here she goes--Gnd there she g0esl"
His wife surveyed him.with alarm,
And rushed to him an4 seized his arm;
III shook her Off and to and fro
His fingers persevered to go,
While curlcd his very nose with ire.
That S he against him should conspire
and with more furious tone arose
"Here she g0es-and there she goesF'
"Lawks''' screamed the wife ''Im in whIrl
'Lawksl he is mad! what made him thus7
Good Lord what will become of US?
Ran fora docter--run--run-run--
For Doctor Brown and Doctor Dun,
And Doctor Black and Doctor " hite,
nd Doctor Gray with all yeur might
The doctors came, and looked and wondered,
And shook their heads, and paused and pondered,
Till one proposed Ike should be- bled,
.'Ao-leached you n,ean"-,the other said
"Clap blister y roared another,
"No1cup him'-"No--trepan him, brother!"
4 sixth would recommend purge,
the next would aR EN- etic urge,
The eighth. just come from dissection,
His verdict gave foran iniertiou;
The last produced box Of pills,
certain cure Tor earthly ills;
Il had patient yesternight,"
Quoth he, "and wretehed was her plight,
And as the only means to save her,
Three dozen patent pills gave her,
nd by tomorrow suppose
"Here she goss--and there she gossi;'
.syou are all fools" the lady said,
.Ihe way is Just to shave his head.
Thanks motber;1' thoHght the clever son;
/. help the kn4ves that would have bit me,
But all cation shan't outwit mel''
Thus TO himself while to ard fro
His fng perseveres to 60.
and from his lips no accent flows
'Here she goes--ard there she gOesr
The barber came-"Lord help him! what
A Querish customer I've got
But must do our best to save him.
50 hold him, gemmen, while shave him."
Buthere the do ctors interpose--
@'---'- "rasrs she goess''
81 woman is no judge of physc,
Noteve when her baby is sick,
He must be bied'-s.NO-no---a blister
a. puI ge you meant say blister''
No cup hm .-Leech him. s.Pis! pills! pills..
And all the house the uproar fills.
What means the smilei what means that shiyer2
The landlords limbs with rapture quivef,
And triumph brightans gp his face
His finger yet shall win the race
The Gock l. on the stroke OF nine
and I'd he Starts 'Tis mine! tits minei"
What DO ou mean?
| az mean the fifty!
never spentan hour so thrifty;
Bu. you, who tried to make me lose,
Go, burst with envy il you choose
Bat how ; this2 where are theyf"
i The gen 'Iemen--L n can the two
iCuae yesterday they belowT'
I.sTHey gallOPed of and hour ago.
I''Oh purge me! blister! shave and bleed.
/ For, hang the knaves, I'm mad indeed!"