Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1856-11-22
MISCELLANY.


TALE.
Mr.. Choaie's miserable and nondescript
manuscript has frequently furnished the ba-
sis of many a spirited bon mot, the hest
we ever saw having been penned by the late
Major North. But the peculiar ileeibliiy of
Mr. Choaie's handwriting will be seen by the
following incident -
Ga the occasion Of the meeting !, became
necessary that the letter Of declinauon should
be publicly read, and the chairman was called
npon 10 fulfill the Office. Chairman accordingly
rOse IN his seat and thrust his hand into his
len hand pocket 10 find the letter Letter
wasn't there. Chairman tiled the righi--nu
go. Tried the coat tail poekets-no success.
Letter turned up missing. Chairman stared at
Secretary, and Secretary, 10 turn, scrntinzed
the counlenance Of Vice President no Choale
manuscript 10 be found. The next step was
fnE the person to whom 1t was addressed to 20
to his hotel, Colonel Richard b. Jones', in Lock
street, and hunt the letter. Col. Jones Was as
busy, when his guest entered, as a musk rat at
high water, engaged in giving DuIch carpen-
ter directions for making an ornamental cor
nice
tat gent rushed into the saloon, putting like
porpoise what's your hurry -
"Why, Colonel, I'm as mad as thunder ;
I've lost Rufus Choaies letter to the Demo
cratic meeting, and they're waiting 10 hear it
read"
"Ah, indeed that's a pity remarked the
Colonel, with his usual sympathy "Where
did you leave ii lasil"
well, the fact is, don't know but I'm
pretty sure | LEFT ii in my room"
'lIave you looked there ~
"Yes but can, find it,
''Why, that's very strange nobody has en-
tered your room since you left, Suppose you
go up and take another look"
The fat gentleman acquiesced, and they as
cended the stairs together, when fat gent espcd
paper lying on the floor, which he declared
TO be the missing document. This he seized
and hurried up 10 the State House, where the
meeting was in session. lie entered, aud as
the audience were on the clmacleric of expec-
fancy TO know what Mr. Choaie's sympaihies
were fat gents appearance, red as lobster
in new suit Of vormillion, with paper in
his hand, produced ronnd of applause Fat
gentleman snbsided into chair, and wiped his
face with square yard Of cambria, while Sec
rotary arose, adjusted his speetacles and neck
tie, pulled up his shirt collar precisely three
quarters OF an inch higher, and then unfolded
the document. When he did so, he blushed
scarlet, returned paper TO fat gent, and sa,
down. Audience began to hiss, while fat gent
soon saw that, instead Of the Choale letter. he
had brought with him, by mistake, an archi-
teciural design. As il was too late to read
the letter, and while the Secretary stated the
facts of the case, our fat friend returned tn
Col. Jones, to enlist his sympathy While
the Colonel was listening to his chubby friend S
narrative, in comes Dutch carpenter. with a
planed board under bis arm, sawed in angles
innumerable. Duichy looked ira,e, and, as
matter of course, his employer wished 10 know
why.
"Why, chOues, shust give up dis chob,
nad has noting more 10 do nit t-dat ish all ="
why mott" was the surprised reoinder.
YES, why moi :" added fat gent, quite in.
iersIed in the mans manner.
well, because it takes too much shtufr.
nnd too much work und oosh money on il
pesides."
why, yon get all you ask, don't you %
inquired the Colonel.
"Yes but you tell me dat de diagram was
plaln' und you sends me one what ish different
every ten foot, und ash hard to make ash der
luyfel."
Why, that's oda e. says the Colonel.
Let's look at III"
DeFe, by londer!" said Dutehy, producing
the paper, and spreading it on the table,
Shoos' dell me how you drinks make dat for
six dollars 80
The deuce !" exclaimed the Colonel, with
emphasis.
Goodness gracious !" said the fat gentle.
maa' Hes been making ooraice by that Choate
kfterg -
ouch was the case. Tho carpen,er-a new.
arrived Lelpslger-had by sumo mistake
go' mold OF the fat pen,eman's treasure. and
ssnPpos'ns 1t TO be The Colonel's draft of tan
iankee eorniee," had faithfully endeayored TO
saw out pattern. It was a most unexampIed
case Of perseverance under extreme dificnI,ies
|" Col Choa'e's manuscript, looks very much
what Virginia worm fence must appear 10 .
enileman upon hard spree.