Lynchburg daily Virginian. [volume] (Lynchburg [Va.]) 1852-1861, 1856-07-30
MISCELLANEOUS.

We have often seen accounts of Yankee ingenuity
hut think the annexed anec,oe IL OF the hest
Nehnvc read:
A Curr YANKrr An excellent story Is told CON
eerniup The manner in which Yankee sold the land
lord In village In Ohio through which the Great Ma
tional Road passed. 1t was we'll known by the trnv-
ellars this road that II wne impossible TO get n
fa men at the hotel IN question: because mn under
standing existed between the landlord and the driver
aud almost M soon tho passengers seated at
the table the stage WAS ready To start On one oe-
ension, among the passengers was Yankee, who
would he "go dnrnd II he wouldn't hev the vale oil
his money any henowp Ills fellow passengers were
anxious 10 know how to manage II, aud utter while
they learned how.
"Brcnkast ready gents said the landlord, ms the
stage drove up to the door "'fakc wash, gents2
Here's water. hasins, towels and soap"
After performing these nblntions, they nli proceed
ed To the dining nnd commenced an onslang,
upon the cdibles, though IIcz took his time, Scarce
" had they tasted their coffee, when they heard the
nnwccome sound OF the horn, and the driver exclam
stage ready Up rise eight Rrumbling passengers
pay their tifiy cents and take their seats.
"Al aboard gensp' inquired the landlord.
cone missing" said they.
Proceeding 10 the dining ROOM the host finds 1Iez
very coolly helping himself to an immense piece OF
steak, the size of n horses lip
'Noull be left air. Stage l. going To start
oval, | hnint got nothing TO say agin it, drawls
out IIcz.
"Cant wait, sir; better take your seat
"Dew whnt2'
"t;ct in, sir"
"I'll be gol dnrned IF ! dew nuihcr, till Tycgoi my
hrckussl I've paid for it, and am goin' TO get the
vale ont and eff yew cnkerlate ain't, ycw are mis-
taken
So the stage did stnrl, and left Ilcz, who continued
his attack upon the edihlcs. Biscuits, coffee &c.,
disappeared rapidly before the eyes of his aslonished
landlord,
"Say squire them ere cakes Is bout oout fetch us
another prst on en- You, Ito the waiter nnrlhrr
cup of that mir coffee. Pass'them eggs, Raise your
own pork, squirrel This mnzin nice ham. Land
bout here toleblc cheap squire2 llaint much M pie
timber, hey yew2 Dewin right smart trade, squire,
! cakcrlate Don't lay yer own eggs, dew YEP and
thus Iez kept quzzing the landlord until he had made
hcnry meal "Sny, squire now Pm bout 10 con
clude paying my dcrowcrs tew this ere table, bnt Ell
yew'd just give us II bowl OF bread and milk tcw
Ter top off with, I'd be Obliged tew ye.' SO ont 20
the landlord and winter for the bowl Of milk and bread
and yet them before lez.
"Spoon tow if ycw ulcasen But no spoon could
be found The landlord was sure he had plenty
of silver ones lying on the table when the stage
dSay, yew dew you think any Of the passengers
took them2'
Il don't know, DO you think they did7'
"Dew think No. don't think, but ! am sartln.
If they air all green yew bout here, I'm going
10 locate Immediately and nt wonsi.'
The landlord rushcs out to the stable and starts n
man after the stage, which hnd gone about three
miles. The oyertakes the stage and snys some
thing to the driver In n low tone. He immediately
turns bnck, aud on arriving ut the hotel lIez came
out 10 take his seat and snys;
"Ilcow are ycw, gents2 I'm rotten glad tcw see
yew."
Landlord says TO lIcz;
"Can yon point ont the man you think has the
spoonsY'
"Pnt him couN Sarainly ! kin. Say, squire, ]
paid yon -and-ninepence for II breakfast and
cakcrlatc got the value ont Yew'll find them
spoons in the coffee pol Go ahead-all aboard, dri-
yerp