The Westerly echo, & Pawcatuck advertiser. [volume] (Westerly, R.I.) 1854-1858, 1856-08-14

heart wholly yours. thought no sac
rifce to great to contribute to your hap
piness. l believed you cold, but
hoped to win your heart. l knew not
that it was not in your keeping. You
told me truly that you did not love me,
but not that you had poured out your
bert affections on some other shrine, and
had no heart to give to him who loved
you more than life. Had you never
loved, | could not have reproached you,
even had | failed to gain your heart
but knowing what it was to love-oh, it
was unwomanly, it was cruel to enter
upon such hollow mockery as was our
marriage give in exchange for the
purest devotion heart cold, dead, in
capable of love. Yet you could do this
calmly, coldly you could resolve to
take step which has embittercd my
whole life while I, poor fool, worship
ped you, you could cody calculate the
power my infatuation would give you
over me, and dcceiving me with artful
words and cunning half truths, could
marry me for my wealth, and once as
surcd of that, throw off disguise and
tauntingly toll me that you love another,
that you can never love again-expect-
ING still perhaps to find in your poor
idiot of husband the same abject
slave that his folly has made him to
your caprices. But you mistake, Mrs.
Mackenzie. Listen to me. You are
proud and so am I. TO the world we
will still be outwardly the same, but
though we still dwell under the same
roof, this hour separates us forever
Henccforth, madam, we are strangers.
l made no reply, but with a mocking
courtesy out of the room. Strange as
it may seem, for several days after
this interview l was perfectly happy.
1t was a relief to me that | need no
longer endure my husbands caresses,
no longer play the hypocrite but as
days passed my feelings changed. |
missed his constant kindness and deli
cate attentions, and it was very bitter to
me to know that he despised me. |
began to despise myself. knew that
l had wronged him in marrying as |
bad done for home, though it was not
his wealth which had tempted me-
Others wealthier than he l had reject
ed, and would have shared his homo
had it been a humble one, because in
truth respected and esteemed if l did
not love him-neverthcless, the sin was
the same. had married, knowing tha
I did not love the man I took as my
husband, and was receiving just re-
tribution. ... ...
Mr.. Mackenzie supplied me with large
sums of money, with look and manner
that said as plainly as words that l
should not be disappointed in the objec,
of my marriage. The most bitter word:
could not have humiliated me as mucl
as this silent contempt. How hatct
/ the gold he heaped upon ms, but
!, dared not refuse it: l laid it aside
' using as little as possible, and resolved
at least to repay him by the strictes
attention to his wishes, and to the coln
, fort and order Of his household.
So two years passed on My husband
r devoted hmsolf to his profession, anC
was daily winning lairels. saw it will
pride-alas not with pride alone, for
| was forced to confess to myself at las
that | loved him as | had never love,
Leonard, with a trust in his worth tha
increased my tenderness tenfold.
| knew it from the pang of jealousy
felt when he was at all marked in bi
attentions to any lady d; | felt it from
the agony it caused me to note th,
change from polite attentions in public
to utter Indifference in private Oh
what would | not have given for tha
love had once scorncd How bitterly
| repcnted my folly now that it was tc
late
Gradually his manner changad he
|, grew restless and troubled. l felt that
, knew the cause too well. I hat
, alienated him from me, and now he hac
not only ceased to love me, but I feared
|. that some other had gained his heart
that he longed to be free from the til
which bound him to a woman he detcst
cd His Indifference had been painful
: enough, but bis aversion was harder ye
, to endure my punishment was create
than | could bear.
Yet what right had I to embitter BIZ
whole life Had | not caused him suf
fering enough already, without poisonin!
bis future Yet how could | release
him What remedy was to be found p
He was a lawyor, and perhaps nigh
discover. some way of escape if so,
resolved, cost me what it might, would
not place any obstacles in the way Of his
release. / knew that he had some pro-
posal to make to me, and l lOnged, yet
dreaded to know all
At length, one evening he requested