Indiana American. [volume] (Brookville, Ind.) 1833-1861, 1856-10-24

lfcpiys Tor NUT nave some safety
valve through which to let OH my
superhuous emotions. In the mean
time. Il you have any similar conf.
dences TO impart--and l have often
lancicd yoar melancholy eyes prophe.
sied Of tender memor,es--j ou will
hnd in me sympalhising listener.
Yours cordially,
pnILIe McGREooR.
| Paul Sommer6eld, Esq.
JuxE 7ih. i0--
Mr.. Philip McGregor:-Your favor
OF the 20lh. ultimo Was duly received
per post. | was glad to hear from
| you. even though IN the unsatisfactory
manner in which / did. am proud
of the condolences you repose in me.
and The esteem you have for me. iu'
your letter dear Philip, stirred old
memories In my heart.
born Of youth. hope and love. aye,
and OF sorrow too. Little did you
dream the truth Philip MeGregor.
when you lightly asked me II ever
loved But you came 10 mans es-
tale long after my early youth, md
although we have been so long and
endearingly associated. have never
told you my hearts history; ] will
tell you now, bat II will cost me great
pain and many tears.
was the only child OF n gentle
widowed mother: cannot remember
my father. but | was about six yeas
old when my mother married second
ftime. and gave me. as che said. new
father | had not much cause 20 70.
greet the loss OF my FIRST parent IL he
was anything like his successor. who
was q cold stern man. unfond OF chill.
dren. and only remember him as the
terror Of my childhood. and the fierce
reprovcr Of my childish foIies. Such
y thing as affection or sympathy he
never showed for me. although he was
n pious man. and proiessed n great
deal Of godly zeal aud emotion. My
mother was much changed after her
second marriage; tho pie,y Of my
step.ialher seemed 10 opprcss her. she
was far more afraid offending him
Than Of offending her maker. aud her
awe Of him. and tho restraint she ex.
hib,ed Ia his prescnce we,e only too
apparent even to my childish com.
prehensIon. But 10 me eho was more
lender aud gentle than ever. My step
father WIS oIergyman; he WAS lite
rafy IN his tastsa. and had largo H.
brary OF choice miscellaneous books.
and when not engaged IN the duties of
his parish he spent the greater part Of
his time in this library. II Was pro.
scfibed spot 10 me. | never yenIured
there, except 10 The absence OF my
sltp'iaiher. and then II was 10 steal
some long coveted bovk. 70 bear away
and pore over. for reading was the re-
creation Of my liie. WAS unlike
other boys--indeei l never was boy
|at aII. had been so long the sole
companion Of my ,imid mother that l
had acquired morbid sensi,iveness
OF disposition. and from associstng
exclusively with grown people seem.
cd premslurciy old. Nurse used to
cali me ian old fashioned child" md
not having a clear apprehension Of her
meaning. felt myself stigmasixed
with some sor, OF peculiarly which
caused me much distress. As my
mother had taught mo ut home, | had
never been sent TO school. and my nat.
ural reserved aud sensitive disposition
was strengthened by the secluded life
| led. My affections were conccn,rn-
ted on few Objects. Ny mother.
my curse and M, dog, were the only
animated beings loved. but my ideal
world was full OF heroea. whom en-
ulaied and worshiped IN scrct. l
loved Nature with something like
poets lervor. Trees. rivers and hills
and all objects OF natural glanduer
were endowed with spirit of com
psnionship Cor me. and spent hours
alone Ia communion with them. But
cannot look back upon my boyhood
without a feeling Of oppressive sad.
ness. so circumscribcd were my Joys.
80 utterly bereaved was Of all youth
iul compauionship. Nv mother had
now become nm invalid. and did not
leave her room. but safe in her arm
chair nll day. and never was so happy
and eontsnted as when | was by her
side. She was very feeble and help
less. and seemed to have hope in life.
but sat patiently expecting the angel
Of Death. Ny memory holdsno pic
tufe which touches me rs the image
Of my suffering mother. sitting wait
Ing, her prophetic gaze dxed on that
future which Is veiled by the mystic
ries of death. IaIways l read in her
room. and though she seldom spoke,
my presence seemed TO give her inf
mite satisfaction. II was my step
fathers command that | should not
be allowed TO read works Of fiction,
although his library was largely com
posed Of such looks and he indulged
his own taste in reading them. / so
far respected his prohibition as never
knowingly to infringe it. l found
books Of history, biography. travels
and poetry Ia his ample library. and
found sufficient food for my mind,
which was mature for ny age. 10 these
and | asked for nothing more. One
day came upon he Life and ad-
ventures Of Robinson Crusoe." splen-
ddly Illustrated. was overjoysd at
my good fortune and bore it in tri-
umPh to my mothers room. Oh
what a delightful book. l seemed no
lonper in my mothers chamber. l was
sailing on the stormy ocean and roam
ing DER the desert island with the
wonderful Crusoe. / had finished
the story one. day. and was sitting
with the book on my lap. my Thoughts
far away dreaming Of adventures oI
which l was the hero. | was so alb
sptbed in my revery that l didn't
hsed the entrance OF my step.father,
although Iobserved my mother turn
her head and sflancc anvfouSlv he