Volcano weekly ledger., 1856-08-23

place, and go home and settle your affairs" I"
The banker was thunderstruck He con-
sdered with himself for a while. Well
sirl" said he at length, if it must be so,
meet me tomorrow at two o'clock, in the
large field north of - Lodge, in the -
Road, with your friend, and a pair Of pis
tolls
Enough, sir, said the brusque captain and
they parted
Inc Parties were on the ground at the
time appointed. The captain was accom-
panied by his friend the major The banker
was attended by gentleman in a suit Of pro-
iesslonal black-a very unmilitary, and most
evil looking parsonage. As they approach
ed, the major suddenly stepped before his
principal, and addressing the bankers second
said:
1t was perfectly understood, sir, that pis-
tolls were to be the weapons employed on this
occasion; but here, sir, if i mistake not, you
bring blunderbuss under your arm
beg your pardon said the other, draw
ing the instrument forth; it is no blunder-
buss, but a telescope
And what, in Heavens name is the
meaning of this? hope it is not meant as
an additional insult to my principalP
OH by no MEANS" said the banker, who
proceeded to inform the major of his previous
and present readiness to apologize, assuring
him that he had intended no offence to his
friend the captain, and that he was now
anxious to explain. The apology was de-
clined as before, and an explanation was de
manded
In the first place, said the banker, | ear
nestly beg that you, captain will look through
this telescope
What, sir, I?-Look through telescope?
BY Heaven, sir, what foolery is thsp
The bankers second claimed to he heard
insist, said he, that this is most serious
and important to my eli, to my friend.
1t is such breach of all the customary
forms, said the captain. Such a proposal
is quite intolerahlc
regret said the banker to the major,
that should have to urge this request; but
it is to me most necessary preliminary
Will you, major, do me the favor to apply
your eye to the teleseope2 l put it to you
as gentleman and an officer, whether there
is any offence in the requestp
Nay, SIR said the major, | do not say
that but 1t seems to me so absurd-so con-
trary to the established rules in such cases
Here, sir said the banker, holding up
the telescope, place your eye TO it but one
moment-there-in that directonv
Where" said the major, carelessly apply
ing his eye to the telescope. He looked for
an instant Egadp said he, see a very
fine woman walking about on grass plat,
with little trot of child in one hand, and
two Others pranking round her Bnt what,
! should like to know, has this to do with the
matter in handr
Everything, said the banker, with a seri-
Gus face; that lady, sir, is my wife. Those
children are mine and hers; and we are mu-
tually attached"
Pshawp said the captain; what is that to
me2 You should have thought of this be-
fore
| know it is nothing to you, sir said the
banker, as you have no wife or children /
believe am correct in saying that you have
no wife or children. Nuw then, | ask, do we
meet on equal termsY
Why no-ccrtainly not, said the major,
but it is too late to think of this on the
very ground; it is quite informal-this dis
cussion; it is really quite,-quite;1 and
hereupon the major took II huge pinch of
snuff TO ill up his smile.
| warned you to settle all your affairs,
broke in the captain, as if a sudden bright
thought had occurred to him.
True said the banker, pointing to the
distant family group but could not settle
them have settled everything else
The bankers second now ventured to OBJ
serve that as the captains second had admit
ted the parties about to contend were not on
equal terms, they should be made equal, or as
near as possibly so, before the actual COM
tnencement of hostilities; and he appealed to
them to do so as men of honor and gentle
men,
Well, there is certainly show of reason
and that sort of thing, in what YOU say OBJ
served the Major But how in the name of
goodness is that to be effectedY
Nothing easier exclaimed the gentleman
in black Your friend the captain has an
independent income of fifteen hundred per
annum and no family; whereas the income of
my friend though he has some little proper
ty-mainly depends upon his exertons: and
he has wife and three children Now if the
captain should shoot him, he ought to make
over five hundred year to his family, and
thus the parties would be upon equal terms
Putting affection out of the question,
added the banker
The Major, at this, looked blank and puz-
zled the captain all astonishment
=" 1t would only be putting down your
handsome phaeton and pair" rejoined the
bankers second, calmly.
IL nL -. L : .