The Lancaster ledger. [volume] (Lancaster, S.C.) 1852-1905, 1856-08-27
JAlstellallu.
From tic Modern Story Teller.
SATISFACTION.
G. e N r L E M A NJ
"Sir, | will have sa,isfa ,,ion ~

Sir, | will have satisfa .tion ~
The words were uttc.cd in a loud and
angry tone 10y IA military looking per.
sonage, in the saloon of one o our most
respectable clubs, frsqucnted by opuient
merchants, country squircs, bankers, and
lords, with sPriukling of naval and mill.
tary gentlemen.
Sir, will have satislac,ionw So say
ing, and buttcuing up hi, military sur,out
with :be mir of man who has detcr,nin.
cd on some desperate course, the offended
hero vanished out of the room. lie was
Immediately observed to mount hand
some phaeton, drawn by pair of SIN ,rt
grays. Ills tiger leaped up behind, and
the equipage drove of with furious cla,-
ter up st. James's street.
Satisfaction" OF course every one
within hearing knows the meaning Of the
words, when uttered by imam OF honor
and gentleman" In fashionable cir.
cles satisfaction means the chance Of
projecting an ounce Of lead in the shape
of bullet into some offending fricn is
body; but the man of wounded honor is
equally satisfied" il his friend sends the
bullet into his own head and il his head
resists il, then he may thank the thickness
OF his skull, rather than the soundness of
bis brains. Two men Of honor fall ou,
about the most tritling matter, perhaps
infamed with wine, begin TO talk auyrily
-one OF them uses an offensive word in-
stantly the other calls for " satisfaction" :"
The two +" friends"- call them fools rather
come out in the cool gray Of the next
morning with two other "friends" equally
foolish, and then, in some chalk pit or ra-
vine each sets himself up as target for
the other. Two bullets instantly speed
upon their fools errand. They miss
Welll-the two seconds step up-"inter-
fere 10 prevent further hostilities"
ella ing that their friends "honor is salts.
fed"--and they march off to breakfa
thinking they have done some valiant
feat; or, the baiis hit their nara, oHe, if
not both, lie on the grass; bullet has
lodged in the spine Of one, and another
bullet in the shoulder,joint Of the other.
Forth steps wiry man with box ofim-
Plements, devised for the cutting out, ex-
tracting, or wrcnching away Of the little
bullets from flesh and bone. All! with
one Of them II is too late; he lies on the
grass, brea,hless, bis lips apart, his eyes
glazed :--he is dead; he has had his de-
sire--"the satisfaction Of a gentleman" I"
The other, after submitting TO the tortures
Of bullet extra ,tion, is borne from the field
on litter, satisfied ;"bc has "ki.led his
maa.P Such is "honor" in the mouths Of
fools.
But we must return 10 our story
Scarcely had the gentleman Of wcsnded
honor rushed out Of the house, ere ire
friends Of the other assembled round him
to ask, "What is the matteri And how
did you fall out !"
"The NATTER" said the offending gen.
man, who sat somewhat stupified at the
abrupt and threatening exit of bis militia.
~ friend "why, the fellow Is as irascibIe
rs q turkey y-cock. We fell into dispute
about politics, about which he knows pos.
itively nothing. lie became moro and
more insolept, and his arguements were
at length so absurd, that could not help
burs ting out laughing. and telling him lie
was bullet-headcd fool"