Daily American organ. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1856, 1856-01-31
Won sweitrol on Politics. I


Won sweitxeI on Politics. sg
SHINE neighbor Wilhelm, yot you tink Of bolitics,
hey ~ asked Peter Won Slug of his neghbor Won
SweitzeI the Twelfth Ward blacksmith, last even
ing, as he seated himself beside him in "Bier-
haus.p a t ~ pt
II thinks much" said sweitzel, giving his pipe a
long Whit.
well, yot you tinksg"
" comes to der conclusion dat bolitics is one
big fool" &s,.3 try. gye0t8
"Ah!" exclaimed Pete, after taking draught
from his mug, 6 how do you make him dat ?"
"Vell, mine frien, tell you,1' replied Sweitzel,
after few whifs aud drink 81 comes to dish
place ten years last evening by der Dutch Alma
nae, NIT mine blacksmith shop. builds mine lit
tie house, poots up mine bellers makes mine
fire, heats mine iron, strikes NIT mine hammer,
gets plenty Of work in, and makes monish."
s'Dat ish goot," remarked Peter at the same
time demanding the'drained mug to be reflled.
~ say dat / make much friens, continued Will
helm, reiighting his pipe. Der peoples all say,
Won Sweitze bees goot man, he blows in der
morning, he strikes in der night, and he minds his
business So they spraken to me many times, and
it makes me feel much goot here" slapping his
breast
Yaw, yaw, dat ish gooter," remarked Pete, who
was an attentive listener.
"vel, it goes long dat way tree year. Tree !?
Let me sec one year make tree hoondred toler
der next year tree hoondred an fifty, der next year
four hoondred an swonzy, an der next five hoon-
dred toar. Dat make five year, when old Mike,
der Waterman, who bees such bad man, comes to
me and he say nes
Sweitze what makes you work so hard :"
''To max inonish, tell him.
81 dells you how you make him quicker as dat, "
he say. -
q ask him how, an den he tells me to 90 into
bolitics and get big Office. laugh at him, ven he
IL. H. L. H.
barty speeches about Faderland-bees agoin' to
run for Congress- an dat Snake, der lawyer dells
him to dell me- i'll would 60 among der beeples, an
dell them to vote mid him all der while, he would
put me in Won big office, where l make twenty
tousand tollars year." h E@
Twenty tousand mine Coil" exclaimed Pete,
thunder struck,
g Yaw, twenty tousand. Veil, by sinks, |
shust stops der strikin an goes to mine fiens, an
all der Yarmans vote for Snake, an Snake bees
elected to der Congress- ~ aetss
Here Mynheer Won Swetzel stopped, took along
draught Of beer and fixing his eyes on the floor,
pulled his pipe as if in deep thought
Veil, mine neghbor," said Pete, after waiting
due length Of time for him to resume, vat you
do den, ell ~
well, ask Mike, der swell-head Waterman, for
der office, an he dells me gets him the next year
! waits till after der next krout making time, and
den say again, Mike, ven viii Snake give me dat
twenty tousand toer Officer In two year.
sure, he say, : if you work for der barty. Veil, /
stop blowin' NIT mine bellers agn, an | blow
two years for der barty init mine mout"
1.-Two year NIT your mout?' asked Pete in as
constituent. .
Yaw two year, Den again go to Mike, der
swell-head watchman, an dell him der twenty tou-
sand tollars about, an he dels me in won more
year / gets him sure / dnk he fools me- yet /
blow for de barty annuder year, and den vat you
dinksg ar tsa a
'Dinks! Wy, you gets him twenty toussud toll
lar"
''Gets him2 Py shinks Mike, der sweilhead
watchman dells me bees Won big fool, an dat /
might go to der bad place. and cut sour krout."
z He tell you dat?" ne
''Yaw, sure as my name bees Won Sweitzel"
: !" After you do der blowing init your mout for
der barty ~
uYawn ra "a ls
Mine Got vot you doend, mine neighbour ?"
g makes FIRE in my blacksmith shop, blows
my bellers agin, heats mine own iron and strikes
NIT mine own hammer m
] say to myself; 5 ea3 1908
Wilhelm Won Sweitzel, bolitics bees hum
bug, aud politicians bees bigger Won. Wilhelm
Won SweitzeI, do yer blowing, an let politicians
do dersW fsg-,S.,s s .gs
Neighbor Pete thought he had come to a wise
conclusion, aud after wishing all sorts Of bad luck
TO poiicians--that class of men whose patriotism
aud integrity lie in their pocket they ordered their
mugs to be again re-flled and changed the topic
of conversation. 81
AMERICAN HUMoR.--In lecture on this subject
lately a New Highlander, whose name we have for
gotten, gave the following illustration
AS the usual occupants of the bar-room at An
dover were sitting about the FIRE in the evening
each with his cigar and glass of suspiciouslooking
liquor in bis hand--there entered farmer from
the g North Parish, with the air of man who had
much on his mind to communicate. "Yed ought
to a ben over to the North Parish this mornin, "
said he, there was little the wust fire, ] guess,
that they've had for twenty years in Essex county.
Pettingelrs new barns burnt down Aatter n Jeru-
salem. Pettingell, he was off down to Newbury-
port with a load o. hay, and they came whit owl
and lit there on the end o. the barn. Well, that
air wild Irish Paddy he's had over there---I don't
see no use O. havn' no sech goodfor-nothin' shoat
reound--he went and got out Pettingclrs ole
Kings arm to shoot hm-jest to please the chill
dren-jest foolishness.
Well, they expect some o. the waddin went up
into the barn window, ont the hay; emmy how'n
bout half'n hour the barn bust out all in a light
blaze burnt up morn twenty ton o English hay,
and much as sixteen or seventeen cows, and three
o Pettingelrs horses. They didn't get out but
jest one old critter and he amt good for nothn
burnt the rest on em all up clean Pettingell, he
got home rite in the middle ont They amt no
insurance, and he's most crazy bout it, He's been
takin' on than ever / see. I've been up
there tryin to cheer him up but he feels dreffie
bad / tell you" ltE tu sHr $
When this circumstantial narrative was con-
Guided, there was general silence, the result
probably of sympathy for Mr.. Pettingel aud Of
speculation perhaps, upon the singularity Of the
accident which had led to his loss After the lapse
Of several minutes, however, the pause was broken
by dull, frosty-faced old fellow, who had been
4 IL Il
had finished. Looking up with an, as yet, unsat-
iaGad arnreasian of face he innnred