Daily Iowa State Democrat. [volume] (Davenport, Iowa) 1856-1859, 1856-11-12

LIE reporter OF Ihe San francisco
IS furnishes that paper with the fol-
wing report Of a speech made by
california auctioneer:
ladies and gentlemen, now have
the honor Of putting up fine pocket
handkerchief a yard wide, a yard long
and almost yard thick one half cot
ton, and t'other half cotton, too; beau
tiiully printed with stars and stripes
on one side, and the stripes and stars
on t'o,her. 1t will wipe dust from
the eyes So completely as to be death
to demagogues, and make politics as
bad a business as printing papers. Its
great length, breadth and thickness, to-
gether with its dark color, will enable
it to hide dirt, and never need wash
ing. Going at one dollar !-seventy
five cents fifty cents twenty five
cents :-one bit !: Nobody wants It'll
oh thank you, sir.
Next. gentiemen-for the ladies
won't be permitted to bid on this arti-
cle-is zeal, simon-pure, tempered.
highly polished, keen edged Sheffield
razor; bran spankin new never open
ed before to sunlight, moonlight, star
light, daylight, OF gas-light; sharp
enough to shave lawyer or cut dis
agreeable acquaintance OF poor rela-
ton; handle of buck-horn with all
the rivets but the two at the ends of
pure gold. Who will give two dollars,
one dollars half dollar! Why, We
long-beardeds dirty faced reprobates.
with not room on Your phizzes for a
Chinese woman to kiss, I'm offering
you a bargain at half dollar. Well, !
| will throw in this strop at half dol I
lar razor and strop-arecent patent;
two rubs upon it will sharpen the city
attorney; all for four bits; and piece
Of soap, sweeter than roses, fathers bet
ter than schoolmaster, and strong
enough to wash out all the stains from
q California politicians countenance,
all for four bits. Why, you have only
to put the razor, strop and soap under
your pillow at night to wake up in the
clean shaved. Won't any
body give two bits, then, for the lot
| knew | would sell 'em.
"Next, ladies and gentlemen, offer
three pairs socks, hose, stockings, or
halfhose, just as you're mind to call
them, knit by machine made on pur-
pose, out of cotton wool. The man ,
who buys these will be enabled to walk
ill he gets tired; and, provided his +,
boots are high enough, needn't have
my corns; the legs are as long as bills
against tue corporation, and as thick :
rs the heads Of the members Of the
legislature. Who wants 'em at one
,alf dollarl Thsnk-ee, madam, the !
money.
"Next, l offer you a pair of boots /.
made especially for San Francisco, with &
leels long enough to raise man up :
o the Hoadley grades, and nails to in ,
ure agai s. being carried over by a !
and slide; legs vide enough to carry ii
wo revolvers and bowie knife, and :.
he uppers of the very best horse leath-
=. A man in these boots can move
bout IS easy Is the State capitol
Who says twenty dollars! All the {
ax-psyeIs ought to buy pair to kick :
he council with; everybody ought to :.
ave q pair to kick the legislature {
nth; and they will be found Of assist :
nee in kicking the bucket, especially !
,pmebody should kick at being kick .,
!. Ten dollars for legs, uppers and :. =
3. while souls, and miserable souls &
taat are bringing twenty thousand ii IL
ollsrs in Sacramento! Ten dollars.
IN dollars! Gone at ten dollars! q
Next 10 something that you ought 4
) have, gentlemen, . lot Of good gal y :,
,wses-sometimes called saspenders. ~
know that some Of you will after :" :.
while b furnished At the States ex- "
snss, but you can't tell which one, 20 =
~ where ths'ss cheap All that de-
I'VE haa0iag ass not supplied with . Is -
lllews, ksA sAsss would b aoboay 9,
, make lava soaaeaAn ssimiualA q q.
NhA ns>lsu<sHA hAn3 n No. nl>SA2a~ 1 ~