The Opelousas patriot. [volume] (Opelousas, Parish of St. Landry, La.) 1855-1863, 1856-02-02

P'o.s In!nlster after lecu.1lL S"n3av
to close the exercises By singing a. 5o Jor-
dan; y meaning the hymn. aOn Jordan 8
stormy banks stand" TT worthy man was
horrided by hearing the " school immedi-
ately strike up, "Jorda! hard road to
travel, believe..' =, -
Wn have friend who loves uns and detests
|I ";he has thehappy faculty OF coin
III '"ia Il, "orst pun in creation
ally delicioul He asked US, yes yes Jay " why ~ a
butcher could never eat his own a, \. In the
same breath he told us it was bee. lit went
against the stomach!
1t is said that Mr.. Wallaci,l ,sthe
Washington Star, in the recent pugilissffico 8
counter between himself and the Hon. s,f.
Smith, OF Va, W s engaged for several minutes
IN the very selfabnegating business of gnaw
ing and biting his own finger under the delu-
sve idea that it was Mr.. Smiths digit he was
masticating. A truly remarkable instance of
suspension of the sensibilities"
r. An old s Gilman, who had zen awfully
hen ccked : life, was visit lis DEATH.
bed Ter, an. The o. appeared
'SJ AAAuihIoloii' duu lue paTSOu u 10 arouse
him by talking he King Of fTerrors. Hout,
tout, mon," G ID the Scotchman, {" Tn
not scared, a. Zen living six and forty years
with the queen o them, and the king Gamma
be mickle wour."
A correspondent of the NewYork Tribune
says that recently, during the balloting for the
Speakership, an old Democrat from Tennessee
remarked that during the previous twenty
hours be had fancied that he could see the
r. immortal jackson lowering over
the Assembly, and with all the energy and
determination that formerly characterized him.
exclaiming, BY the Eternal, no more Banks III
Two young ladies were singing duet A
stranger turned to his neighbor, saying
Dot 'ot the lady in white sing wretchedly r.
Excuse me, sir" replied he, Z" hardly feel
at liberty to express my sentiments she is my
sister," beg your pardon, SIR answered the
stranger, in much confusion, :" mean the lady
in blue" You are perfectly right there" re
piled the neighbor, +" have often told her SC
my $; she is my wife,"
q. Thy on earth, >ziah," asked Squire
Jones of his sister, MIS-. Larkin, =" did you give
your boy such an everlasting tough name? It's
as long as string of dried apples" "Wel
brother, boys are so particular when they grow
| up, and always want romantic and fine sound
ing names /; and so told my husband we would
call the child Peleg Zerubable Kish Elkanat
Habakkuk, and when he gets old enough he
can take his choice"
A Persian merchant, complaining heavily O.
some unjust sentence, was told by the judge te
go the cadi. "But the cadi is your uncle,
urged the plaintiff "Then you can go the
grand vizier." But his secretary is your
cousin" "1'hen you may go to the sultan
But his favorite sultana is your niece.
Well, then, go to the devil!"' "Ah thai
is q still closer family connections" thought the
merchant as he left the court in despair.
A good old dame was plying her distatf, ant
listening devoutly to her daughter reading the
Bible at her side. She was reading in ths
book of Genesis, and being not yet perfect il
the art, she would now and then miscall {
word. So it chanced that she read, stammer
ingly, these words: g Now these eight die
Micah bore" "What, what's that :" sale
the old lady, " read that again. The gooe
daughter complied, and looking more carefully
read, " did Micah bear' All, that will do,
said the old mother, I" they might milk q bear
but to milk boar, my daughter, is impossi
| ble"