The Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1855-1875, 1856-01-03
widow Bedoit's Papers--A Il istaLe i'll Cont
ing and Flare [ p.

ing and a Flare Up
There has recently been issued from the
publishing house OF j. c. Der5y...a spicy vol
ume entitled The B dott Papers which
contains vast amount of u5habe material.
As a specimen we give a counting scene be
tween the widow and old dyer for whom
she had set her cap. Thus:
Mr.. CRAsE.-Well, widder-I've been
thinking about taking another npaniou-
and l bought I'd ask you
WIDow-"O, Mr.. Crane, egscuSe nv com
molion-its unexpected. Jest hand me
that bottle o campfire of the mentlery
shelf-i'm ruther talnt-dew put llttle mi e
on nv handkerchief and hold il 20 my nuz.--
There-thatll dew-l'm obeegcd lew ye-
now I'm ruther more composed-you may
perceed Mr. Crane.
MR. CRANE.--Well. wilder. l was agoiug
TO ask YOU Observation-Disclosures
WIoow-Contiuer. Mr. Crane. dew
know It's terrible embarIa~>iH. | remember
when my deceased husband made his suppo>i
tons 10 me. he stammeresi anI suffered, and
was 50 awfully illustrated did seem eli he'd
never git il out IN the world, and sp">e 5
siuer4iiy the case, al least II has been with all
them has made supposi.ipns to ne-yoa see
they're gineraIy otcerJing about whai kind
Of an answer they're agwine to git, anu II
kind o makes 'em narvous. Bar when an
individual has reason TO 'spose his attach
ment's reciprocafed. | don't what need
there is o his being fustraeI though must
say it's quite embarrassin' tew me--pray
contInner."
I Ma. C--Well, then, want to know if
you're willing l should have Melissy?
WIDow-The dra 5on!
/ Mr. C-I hain't sed anything to her about
it yet-thought the proper way was to get
your consent first. | remember when court
ed Trypheny. we were engaged some time be-
fore mother kenipe knew anything about Il,
and when she found it out she was quite put
out because | didn't go to her first. So when
| made up my mind about Melssy, thinks me
I'll dew it right tins time, and speak TO the
old woman first
4 WIDow-Old woman. hey. that's purity
name to call me, amazin' perIite, tewi Want
Mclissy, heyi Trlbbeiationi gracious sakes
alivel Well I'll gin it up now. | alters
knowd you was a simple,on. Tim Crane, but
| must confess l didn't think you was quite
SO big fool Want Meiissy. dew ye? If
that don't beat all! What an everlaStin' old
calf YOU must be 10 think that she'd look at
YOU Why. you're oil enough to be her IA
ther, and more tew-Melissy amt only in her
twenty -oreth year. What redckulous idee
/ for man o. your agel gray rat, too
wonder what this world is comm tew
lis astonishin' what fools old wilowers will
make o themselves! Have Meissy. Me
li>Sy.
Ma. C.--Why, wilder, You surprise me
I'd no idea of being treated in this way, after
you'd been so polite to me and made such d
fuss over me and the girls
WIDow.-Shet Yer head. Tim Crane-none
o your sass to me. Theirs yer hat on the Ia
bic, and here's the door, and the sooner you
put on one. and march out out o the other the
better'll it be for you. And | advise you
afore You try to get married agin. to go out
West and sees yer witr's cold-and AFTER
we're satisfied on that pint. Jest put lutte
lampblack on Yer hair--'twouId add to your
appearance, undoubtedly. and be of sarvice to
You when you want to flourish round among
the gal>-and when you've got your hair
fxt, jest splinter the spine o Yer back
'twould not hurt yer looks a mite--you q be
intirely unresistable if you was leete grain
stIaIter
Nh. C.--Weil. | never"
WIDow--Holl Yer tongue. you consarnei
old coot you'll tell YOU there's Yer hat aud
there's the door--be off with ycrSeIf quick
metre. or III give You hyst with the broom
stick
Ma C -Gimmeni
WIDOW. RIs1NG--'Ciit out. | saw aint
aywine TO stan here and be nSul,ed under my
own rutland so, git along--and If You
darken my door again, or say word to MeIis-
sy, it'll be the wu> fer YOU. that's all.
Ma C-Tremenjou>! What buster,
W1Dow--Go long go 'long--go long, YOU
everaStn' old gum | won't hear another
word (stops her ears, l won't. won't. l
won't Ext: Mr.. Crane.