The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1856-10-29

Many years ago there was IN the eastern
part of Massachusetts, worthy old deacon and
although he was an eminently benevolent man
and good christian, yet, it must be confessed
he loved a joke much better than the majority
even OF inveterate jokers. 1t was before church
organs were much in use, and it so happened
that the choir of his church had recently pur-
chased a double bass viol. Not far from the
church was large town pasture, and in it a
huge town bull One hot sabbath in summer
he got out of the field and came believing up
the street. About the church there was plen-
ty Of untrodden grass green and good, and
Mr.. Bull stopped to try its quality, perchance
to ascertain if its location had at all improved
its flavor; at any rate the reverend doctor was
in the midst of his sermon; when boo-woo-
WOO! went the bull.
The clergyman paused, looked up at the
singing seats with grave face, and said:
Il would thank the musicians not to tune
their instruments during service time, it annoys
me very much''
The people stared; and the minister went on
"BooWoo wool" went the bull, as he walked
to another spot.
The parson paused again, and again address
ed the choir:
II really do wish the singers would not tune |
their instruments while | am preaching, for as
| have already remarked, it annoys me very
much.'
The people Uttered; for they knew by the
twinkle of his eve that he knew as we'll as any
body what the real state of the case was. The
minister again went on with his discourse, but
he had not proceeded far before another sboo-
WOO woo-wooh' came from Mr.. Bull, when the
parson paused once more and exclaimed:
q have twice already requested the must
clans in the gallery not to tune their instru-
ments during sermon time. l now particularly 3;
request Lefavor that he will not tune his double
bass yiol while | am preaching"
This was too much. LefaYor got up much i
agitated at the idea Of speaking out in church, f
and stammered out: ... 5
ut isn't me, parson Bits the town bul!' il
"Ohl, said the parson, sis it?" Then the
sexton will please drive away the bull" n
The people laughed; but with gratifed look d
at the success of his joke, parson B. went on
with the sermon.
First class in oriental philosophy will stand
up. Tribes, what is life?
Life consists of money $40 horse, and :
fashionable wife
Good! Next-what is death?
and gives them tombstones as receipts in full 81
Of all demands. A
What is poverty? - =,
The reward of merit genius generally re- ~
'eives from discriminating public. E
What is religion? G
Doing unto others just as you please, with sp
put allowing them return of the compliment. n. u
What is fame? - =
six line puff in newspaper while living, C
md your fortune TO your enemies when dead. in.
Next and last. Which is the quickest and ev
asest method for you to reach heaven? co
Ask any railroad company. of
If you have no distinct idea Of your ances- da
ors, their habits, character, principles and oc-
upations, get nominated for some prominent be
ffice, and the opposition prints will give you If.
our genealogy to the furthest remove They
Ill tell you what your great-grand father pre- ow
FRED for dinner ry,
What is the difference between confirmed me
inner and beggar. One is mend-i-cant and sen
'e other is mend -i-wont. the