Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-06-26
opFosnB 70 MArRInoNY.
els your family opposed 10 mattmouyl'

as your family opposed TO matsimouyt
wal no, I rather guess not, seem as how
tmy mother has had four husbands, and standsa
Rretly smart chsnce Tor havin' another.
sFour husbsadsi Is II Possiblei'
sOh, yes. You see, my mothers christened
name was Mehilable Sheets, ~, dads name
was Jacob Press; aud when they got married
the printers said II was putin the sheets 10
press. When | was born They said il was the
first edition. An yen see, mother used 10 be
the ~tarnelist crilter 70 90 10 evenin' meetins--
She used TO go out pretty late eyeiy night, an
dad was afisiI I'd get in the same habit 50 be
used to put me 10 bed at early candle light
cover me up with a pillar, an put me TO sleep
with aboot jack. Wal, dad had got up every
night an let mother in; If he didn't get down
and open the door pretty dsrned quick when
she cum, he'd ketch particular thunder, SO
dad used to sleep with his head out OF the
window, so as TO wake upquick, an one night
he got his head a little loo Ear out, an he
slipped altogether; an down dad cuin, cahum-
Nx, right down on The payemedt an smashed
him in ten thousand piecesl
what! was he killed by the lallP
'Wal,no, no, not exactly by the TALL. hather
kinder soIter guess II was she sudden ietch up
on the pavement, that killed him. But mom
q Guut uuiuf OIL touuu uuu tyh u
had him swept up together an put in a collin
an had q hole DUG in the buryin' ground, an
had dad pull in an buried up an had a white
oak plank put up 10 his head, an had it white
washed all over for a tombstone,
so your mother was left O poor lone widow
'WaL yes, but she didn't mind that mucn,
,twasan't long before she married Sam Hide
you see she married Hide because he was just
dad's size, and she wanted him to wear OF
dads old clothes. Wal, the way old Hide
used to Hide me was q caution 10 my hide
Hide had little the toughest hide Of any hide
except a bulls hide, and the way Hide used to
hide away liquor in his hide was a caution
even to a horses hide. Wal, one cold day old
; Hide got his hide so fun Of whiskey that he
pitched head first into a snow bank, and there
he stuck and friz to- death. So man had him
pulled out, an had him laid out, in the buryin'
sgioun,' an had him buried, an then she had
another plank put DIP 10 bis head, an white.
washed all over, AMI
SO Jour mother was again a widow,
q, yes, but guess she didn't lay awake
long 10 think about II, for in about three
weeks she married Sam Strong-nn' he was the
strongest headed cuss YOU ever did STE. He
went a fshin' the other day an got drowned
AN he was so tarnal strong headed I'll be
'dafned TO darnation If he didn't noat righ'
-agin the current, an they found him aboui
three miles up the stream, an ii took three
-caltle 10 haul him out. Wal, nam hal
him buried along side o. the other two, ant
had o white oak plank put up al n is head an
white washed all over nice, so there is thre,
4on ZEN in a row
'And your mother was a widow for th,
third time.' 2
Yes, but nam didn't seem 10 mind ita tar
anal sight. The next fellow she married wa
Jacob Hayes, an The way nam does max,
him haze is a eaution, now | tell We. II Ii
does anything a leetle out OF the way, man
makes him take a bucket and white wasl
brush an go right up 10 the burin' groun,
and white wash the three oak plants Jest 4
let him know what he may come 10 wheI
he's planted in the same row, am she's go
married TO The 9th husband. So you see m,
family ANITA taTnaI sight opposed to a dose o
tmatrimony.'