Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1856-06-19
A TALE WITHOUT A HEAD.


DR.. Talliaferro, and was said to have in his
little frame heart as big as Gen. Jackson's
to say nothing Of Napoleon Bonaparte OF
Zach. Taylor. He did not fear even old
Nick, and as for GOODNESS he was as cool as
the tip top Of the North Pole.
One day DIR. Tallaferro, upon the occa-
sion of the commencement of a Medical Col
lege, of which he held the chair of Anatomy
gave dinner. Among the guests was q
well known ventriloquist. Late in the even
ing, after the bottle had done it's work, the
conversation turned upon courage, and the
Doctor boasted considerably upon the lion
heart of his favorite man Jake lie offered
to bet that nothing could scare him, and
this bet the ventriloquist took up, naming
at the same time the test he wanted impos-
ed. Jake was sent for and came.
''Jake," said the Doctor, Il have bet a
large sum of money on your head, and you
must win it. Do you think you can ?"
Berry well, massa, replied Jake; .jes
tell dis niger what he's to do, an he'll dc
it shore"
Il want you to go to the dissecting room,
you will find two dead bodies there. Cut
off the head of one with large knife which
you will find there, and bring it to us. You
must not take light, however, and do not
get frightened"
'Dat's all, is it % enquired Jake. ''Oh
berry well, I'll do dat, shore, for sartin; and
as for being frighten, old Satin himself ain t
gwine to frighten me-
"Jake accordingly set off, and reaching
the dissectlng room, groped about until he
found the knife and bodies He had just
applied the former to the neck Of one of the
latter, when from the body he was about to
decapitate, a hollow and sepulchral voice cx-
claimed:
Let my head alone ~
''Ycs, sah," replied Jake, Il amt tick
ular, tudder head'll do jes as well''
He accordingly put the knife to the neck
of the next corpse, when another voice
equally unearthly in its tone, shrieked out
Let my head alone.''
Jake was puzzled at first but answered
presently:
'Look yah, Massa Tollifer sed [ must
bring one oh de heads, and you isn't gwine
to fool :to I.5 Y z---5t
until he separated the head from the body
Thereupon half Il dozen voices all screamed
out:
Bring it back bring it back r'
Jake had reached the door, but on hear
ing this, turned round and said:
"Now, now, see yah jcs you keep quiet,
l. you duce oh fool, and don't wakcn up de
women folk. Massa only gwine to look at
de bumps
Bring back my head at oncc!' said the
voice.
''Tcnd to you, right away, sah,' replied
Jake, as he marched off with the head, and
the next minute he deposited it before the
Doctor.
$50 you've got it, [ see,' said Jake's
master.
eyes, sah," replied the unmoved Jake,
''but please be done looking at him soon,
kase the gcmmen told me to totch him back
rtgM array.
''Pop GOES TIE WEASEL has become the
chorus Of thousand snatches of song, but
not one Of a thousand who sing it ever heard
its origin. But its parentage is as easily
traced as that of an English baronet A ia
nous Methodist preacher by the name of
Craven, was once preaching in the heart of
Virginia, and spoke as follows: Here are
great many professors of religion here to-
day. You are sleek, fat, good-looking, yet
something is the matter with you. Now
you have seen wheat which was plump, round
and good looking to the eye, but when you
weighed it, you found that it only came tc
forty-fve or perhaps forty-eight pounds tc
the bushel, when it should have been sixty
or sixty-three pounds. Take kernel o
that wheat between your thumb and finger
hold it up, squeeze it, and-2oop goes the
weevil. Now, you good looking professors
of religion, you are plump and round, bu
you only weigh some forty-fve OR forty-siz
pounds to the man. What is the matter
All! when you are taken between the thumb
Of the law and the finger of the gospel, helc
up to the light and squeezed, out pops the
whiskey bottle From ''pop goes the
weevil'' to ''pop goes the weasel the tran
sition is easy.
Form OF THE EARrH-The earth being
round like a ball, it follows that at certain
distance, even though our vision can reacl
much further, it's form will prevent us from
seeing objects even if its surface were per-
fectly smooth 1t has been calculated thai
at 600 yards an object one inch high can
not be seen in straight line; at 900 yards
two inches; at 400 yards, five inches a
one mile, eight inches three miles, SIX
feet, so at that distance man would be in.
visible. In leveling, it is usual to allow the
tenth of an INCH in every two hundred yards
or eight inches in a mile, for convexity
We paint our lives in. fresco The sof
and fusilc plaster of the moment hardens
under every stroke of the brush into eternal
rock