davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1856-05-02

A.Hasruu.u Iho Ellsworth Ama..
'au give. tar following account ufun Nht
IuHu political au.mw.'y, which ha. hHa
w1.'j httuira, $50 believe, uth..sa'.
Tho r.utlruru who hl,a tr honor To-. Hr
n..u.u. 'Ie rrrrIrut. mr tNr, ..ar.. ur
samuel VOL. and N.thuu Clifford ",
Iur. lr iM. credit oiuur.harrh., shat ta.
example will mot De- followed
"uu Fact Day, NilI-a.-dHm hI..riu'.r.
and rhs ,F.Iatiul preacher came near ln,.
in.. ls. ST. Paul, o. fshthH1.', &c Erh.
su. Tie Collector uf Customs. 40 Oh.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
A Generalization to the Doctors.

Doctors, one and all-from the beardless NJ
D. just out Of college, TO the gray headed man
whose horse and gig have become fixtures in
our good old Boston Sireets-we congratulate
you. Your hands will be full before the first
of May-your pills will be called for, your
plasleTS in requisiiion. Mix your cough sirups
blythe hogsheadS; YOU will have plenty OF calls
for them. The ladies are preparing for you
they will be happy TO see you. They are 20
ing u scores TO the fashionable shoe shops,
and buying-oh, such dear, Tiny, sweet, ex-
quiSite little shoes, with soles as thin as-al
most as thin as sixptnce-a Well-worn one
and they are going about these cold, snow,
wet, sloppy streets, with furs that cost thirty
and fifty dollars bundled about neck and
shoulders, with thick cloaks and warm dress
es, and those dear little shoes "peepng in
and out' like "little MICE"
So, there you see your work is oil cut out.
Consumption is on a hard galop, behind
"Death and the pale horse" and when he
sees these soles Of paper, he cries with o
chuckle "there's another one"-and forthwith
lets an arrow into the side. Oh, foolish girls
go learn OF the brothers. Look at their shoes
and then at thine. Do you dread The sight o!
doctor ! He will be welcome soon, when
that nrrcw has ranked long enough to tester
in the wound, and the terrible cough, and the
wasting Of flesh, the hollow eyes, the nerve
less tread call for his ally care.-B0ston o.
iue Branch. .....
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
Wholesome Advice,

Keen your mouth shut, all you that will
keep late hours these cold winter nights, in
crowded, heated rooms, until animal vigor and
mental sprightliness. are exhausted, and yel
you must breast theDleak winds Of January
10 90 home. see nothing amiss in the fes'
;ivilies OF friends and neighbors, and kindfed,
these long winter evenings, better than mo
ping at home; nothing amiss 10 the glad re-
unions Of the young and cherry-hearted, even
though they be extended, once in while TO
the wee short hours ayant The twal. love
to see g,adntss in all, at any hour OF The
twenty four; but 10 do these things safely and
long, make it a practice 10 observe two OF
three simple and easy precautions. Before
you leave bundle up well; gloves, cloak, com
forer; shut your mouth before you open The
street door, and keep it resolrtely closed until
YOU have walked briskly for some ten min
utes; then, if you keep on walking, or have
reached your home, you may talk as much a:
you please. Not so doiag, many heart once
shappy sga ,c,ssas,aneR lies in. the church yard
that mghst have been young and happy still
But howl II YOU keep your mouth closed
and walk rapidly, the air can only reach The
lungs by the circuit OF the nose and head, an(
becomes warm before reaching the lungs, thu
causing no derangement; but if you converse
large drafts OF cold air dash directly in upoI
Tho lungs, chilling the whole frame almost in
stonily. The brisk walking throws the blooC
to The surface Of the body, thus keeping up
vigorous circu 0tion, making cold imposSi
BILE, il ycu don't get into cold bed too quicl
after you get home. Neglect of these, bring:
sickness and premature death 10 multitude
every year.--JOnrnal Of Health.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
A Piggish Illustration,

A country girl, several Of whose'sisters had
married badly, was about, herself 10 take the
moose.
''How dare you getmarried, ;" asked cousin
Of hers, "aiter having before you the unfortu-
male example of your sisters :"
"a fudge for the example Of my sisters p'
exclaimed the girl with spirit-"l choose 10
make trial myself. Did you ever rec par.
eel OF pigs running to trough of hot swiIl ?
The first one sticks in his nose, gets it scald-
ed, and then draws it back and Squeals. The
second burns bis nose, ,aud stands squealing in
the same manner. The third follows suit,
and he squeals too. But still il makes no dir
ference with those behind. They never take
warning Of those before, but all, in turn,
thrusts in their noses, just as fthe FIRST hadn't
got burnt or squealed at all. So it is with
girls in regard to matrimony; and now, cous.
in, hope you are satisfied"
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
Histake off night,

The following udicrous incident occurred
recently on board the night train from New
York. Two married couple took their seats
n the cars at New York, bound for Boston,
in close proximity, and about eight O'Clock
they both INDUCED in balmy sumbers, the
head oi their wives resting upon their hus-
bands shoulders. When the cars reached
Worcester, The gentlemen stepped out, and
the ladies' apparently exhausted, slept on
The delay was brief, and on entering The
cars, the husband swhose were scarcely open
ed, exchanged seals, and ia few moments
resumed their natural positions, and were in
The land OF dreams. At Framingham The cars
stopped oeain, when one ofthe ladies asked |:
will you have time 10 give me drink OF
water here 7"
The affrighied gentleman not recognizing the
music of his wifes voice. excIaiued:
by heavens, have | made mistake This
isn't Tilly yp'
"No," exclaimed The lady, "and you ant
my husband" .s
"Perhaps we had better change seals," ex-
claimed the husband in the seat Immediately
in the rear, who had owoke, "for there's a
| slight mistake here"
| The second lady, loo much fatigued, did
not awake, and as the temporary husband en-
deavored to shift his burthen so as 10 move,
she merely calculated mpatiently:-"Do keep
| still +" ... .
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
4 Hard Shell Sermon.

A friend in Lexington KY, tmuch, uery
much, did it griope Us, while in Louisville,
that we couldn't go there, and to Frankfor!,
and Ashland, with party Of friends, 10 par
take Of the true Kentucky. hosp tSlity,of which
we have had such fOretaste, see the blooded
cattle, and the "Blueg,ass Farms," represent
ed as we were told, even feebly by the rich
acres Of "Hunler'S Bottom" on the Kentucky
side Of the Ohio iiver-got 10 get back again,
now, TO the beginning OF this sentence, a
friend then as we have said, in Lexington KY.
sends up the following "Hdrd Shell B0Ptist
Sermon" which he AYERS 10 be genuine, and
forwards Us in proof, the name OF the speaker,
and Of his reporter. II almost equals in close
ness OF argument and sickness 10 text, the
Spontaneous efforts of the clerical he 70 who
played upon Harp Of thousand Stringsr
"My Breethering: The scripture, tells us
I'VE are buried with Christ in BAPTISM 'Bu-
ried,' my friends, not 'sprinkled by baptism.
"Suppose that one Of you had lost little
la' bter, and you had laid her ont, aud pre-
pared her for the grave; and your neighbor
had come in and said: Friend, we will take
thy child and bury it, and afterwards when
you went out 10 zee the grave CT your little
one, you found they had laid her down and
sprinkled little earth over her! What would
you have thunk of tnem
"Suppase again, that in the fall fthe year
you had dug your potatoes, your tuInips, your
parsnipS, and your other roots for the winters
use, and had dug q trench 10 bury 'em in;
and you had said to your servant, Sally, take
the house gang and go and bury those pota.
toes, those turnips, those parsnips, and those
other roots, and afterwards, when you walked
forth to see that all were safe and secure for
The winters use, you had found that they had
just sprinkled a little dirt on them! What my
friends, would you have done Iraether
suppose, my dear breetberen, YOU would ha'
tried the virtews of the cow.Skin!
"But they are not bit worse than those
poor ignorant, and benighten Epscupaians
anG PresbyierianS, land Methodists, who sprink-
les little water on each other, and call il
'buried' by baptism.
81 am afraid, my friends, am very much
afraid, indeed, that they will catch something
hotter than the cowSkin in the day of reckon
ing -Knickerbocker.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
One of the Speeohes.

Job Kolik was one of 'em on the stump
A double baHelled throat and lungs as large
as two bushel baskets, enabled him 10 eleclIi-
fy his constituents up TO fgting point in less
time than it would take for Susquehanna
raft 10 90 over Niagara Falls. His great
speech, delivered in Bob Stubs ten acre lot,
was "ctusher." For the the sake Of poster
ity we give an extract:
"Fellow citizens:-You might just as well
try 10 pry up The Atlantic ocean with broom
straw, o. draw this ere stump from under my
feet with harneSsed gadny, as to convince
me that ANITA gwine 10 he elected this heat.
My opponent don't stand chance-not q
sniff. Why he ain'tas intellectooal as CON-
mon-szed shad. Fellars, am q hull team,
with two bail dogs under the wagon and a
tar bucket-I om. II there's anybody this
side O. where The sun begins 10 blister the
earth that can walop me, let him show him
self--I'm ready. Boys, 60 in for the Amer.
can eagle-claws, stars, stripes and all; and
may burst my everlasting button holes, ef
don't knock down, drag out and gouge every
body as denies it,"
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
A Letter from an Ohio Legislator.

The Columbus correspondent Of The Cler-
mont Sun says the following is copy Of o
letter from member of the Legislature 10 0
hotel keeper in Columbus:
"Mr.--of he-Hotel Columbus Ohio
waunt you 10 maik way for me at your hotel
So can have rune on the fust fore.
suppose you're IouS air tsw stories hi besides
the sellor & want my rune next the kitch-
un reckun will want The rune while the
legislaeter meats of which onerabel body am
member aud live next the line ov the Stait
ov injysn3 in The Stai: Of Ohio, the onerabel
members in the Slait ov indyany las year paid
doIer and a i for board pur weak but Then
vitles were hyer then nur now and think
you ort TO do lrfle better want one or to
cheers in the rane AMI butte iac and my
butes hlakedons weak on soundies,
Yours Ill death, G. r. L.
"P. s. ri;e positively & say if j can get the
rune di-eckt yore letter 10 the kare of the
Secretary Of Danyil Bune counsel in this
county as they told me when was nominated
10 let them see all mi poliikil correspondents,
Yours GIRL
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
A Green Yankee.

The editor OF the Knickerbocker, says,
should like you 10 have seen a specimen OF a
green yankee who came down the sound in
a Hartford steamer with me. He had never
been to Syclk before, and he was asking ques-
tions OF eesybody on board The boat. How
ever It was "green as grass" he was picking
up good deal of information which will
doubtless stand him in good stead hereafter -
One Of his comparisons struck me as decided
ly orginal:
cup the Northampton" said he, 'T took
break fast, and they taxed me tsw shillin's--
twas a pretty good price, but gin it to 'em.
Twas enough, anyway. Well when came
down to Hsrlford, took breakfast agin, next
Gornin' and when | asked 'em how much,
they looked at me aud said half dollar.
looked back at them pooty sharp-but paid
it, and after paid it, ] sot down and cypher
ed mp inside how much i! would cost a felleI
to board long at that rate; and tell you what
1 pooty sooa found eout that fore the end Of o
month, il would make fellows pocket book
look as il an elephant bad stomp'd on ii!'
Sam Slick himself never enjoyed more
striking simie.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

pAmong all the good traits in the charac-
ter Of that remarkable woman, Mrs. Parting.
ion, who il must be admitted does some times
twist the Kings English out of shape is q
generous, charitable, catholic spirit. 1t is
shown in the following letter. There is o
lesson in it for many who speak more grama-
tically than she. She says:
DEAR FRIENDS. letter inviting me to
be with you al Christmas, made me feel very
tappi(ul. | am not one Of your Christmas
neither; because have always been 10 Pres
byerian church, where the gospel was diSpens-
ed with according 10 their tenants, and Christ.
mas was always thought 10 be relic Of Ro.
manism-.he bad women of Babbling men
toned in the scrip!er-but it always seemed
pleasant like to see the green homock and
the underbruSh desecraling the windows oil
the church folks, and ihe laughing voices ol
that time made me feel happier to hear it;
though old Mrs. Wiggin she that was Polly
Neal, caught romantic affection in her back
and had an embargo in her shoulder setting
at window watching the sinners, as she
called 'em, over the blinds opposite, as they
were dancing. She was very envious crea-
tuEe. Thank heaven there amt anything en-
viable about me.
Ian glad 10 see the old differences of reli-
gious sexes melting away like grating wax in
Christian fire, and hope good frurll spring
up from it like Philadelphia pippins on a
ounce stalk. ana not very old, am not an
octag,n nor a centurion, but have lived long
enough 10 see great changes, and be glad oi
'em. lam sorry can't be with you, for my
eyes warns towards you like butter in the
sun. You will please excuse little imperfect.
nesses, for thought must write something,
if il wasn't so sensible, like a good many 9th.
ers. hope you will have nice time. with
all your stockings brim full.
Yours, most effectively,
Ruth PARTINGToN.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

. rPA rather amusing scene was witnessed
at Columbus, Ohio, Post office, the other NOR.
ming,
A rough, uncouth looking customer inquired
for letter at The general delivery. He re-
ceved one, and mol being sure That it was for
him, he asked the clerk 10 rend few lines TO
him. -...
The postmaster with his usual ufbanity and
natural desire 10 accommodate, read as fol-
lows;
Dear S.. This letter comes hoppin
take my pen in Hand 10 inform you that we
are awl well. and hope you are enjoyln the
same blessin. am sorry 10 hear you have
been on another drunken spree
tStopr shouted the attentive listener stop
1 say. That ERE letters for me; so here's
your FIVE cents, and fork that 'ere document
oveI!'
And amid general laugh OF the bystanders,
he vanished.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
Every HOuse has its skel. TON.

How vaiious are the modes by which men
seek 10 plant their gardens Of earthly delight!
One expects his i'll the abundance of his
wealth. No sooner, however, has he gone
through the labor of accommodating it than his
constitution is wasted, and he finds his grave
in place of the Eden upon which his fancy had
so longIuu riot. Another hopes for his gar
den amid the distinctions Of intellectual pre-
eminence, for which he feels himself endowed
by nature, and 10 acquire which he spends
wears OF laborous study, till at length he rules
the empire Of mind with undisputed sway
But is his garden without a sepulchre ?-noth-
ing 10 disturb his repoSe nothing 10 remind
him that he was not born for this world, bat
for eternity? Alas, have seen an end Of
all perfection. He that increaseth knowledge
increaseth sorrow. "Lo'' says Solomon, '1
am come 10 great estate, and have gotten me
more wisdom than all they thst have been be-
fore me in jerusalem: Yes, my heart b d
great experience Of wisdom and knowledge,
and gave my heart to know wisdom, and to
know folly and madness. | perceived that
this, also, is vexation of spirit; for in much
wisdom there is much grief" The young
have the fond anticipationS, Of which nothing
can cure them but the rugged realities of an
| embittered experience, or the vision Of then
Sepu!chre in their flowery field OF real or i'm
agiuary delights. An article appeared some
years ago, entitled "a House with Skele-
ton," detailing The ssofy of q funIily deemed o
mode of happiness above all others in Venice,
till, upon inquiry the wife took one who was
curious to pfy into the secrets Of her bliss into
an upper room and exposed 10 view the ghust'
ly skeleton Of her iormer lover, whom hei
husband had killed out of revenge and Dre.
served his body in that form 10 rebuke hel
wandering affections. Thus every house ha.
its skeleton, every garden its sepuchra.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
Reautifnl and True.

In late article in Frazier's Magazine, this
brief but beautiful passage occurs:
Education does not commence with the
alphabet. II begins with mothers look
with fathers smile of appreciation or sign Of
reproof-wIth sisters gentle pressure Of the
hand, OF brother's noble act os forbearance
with BIRDS nest admired, but not touched
with creeping ants, and almost imperceptible
emments-with humming bees and glass bee.
hives with pleasant walks in shady lanes
and with thoughts directed in sweet md kind
ly tones, and words 10 mature TO acts Of be-
nevolence, to deeds Of virtue, and 10 the sense
of all good--to God himself"
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
1eer Employment,

We hes ffetty good one The other day,
which Va t'i'k merits wider circulation
than h ha. fet. The story runs that some
honest lttt% 19osier went into fancy store in
CiAcinna[ 't'1nnt OF situation.
The pfor. I.5f or head clerk was sitting in
the coun tom, with his feet comfortably
cooked o. The table, and contemplating
human % ough the soflening influence Of
Our I'7| friend addressed him modestly,
!. ssf)o j. M hand about your establish.
81 <'f ske1 M indifferenily, but seeing
d. /. 3 a q have some fun out
Of him. 50 ke snsweTed very briskly, al the
same lime pGlliug out large and costly hand
kerchiet and blowing his nose on il.
"Yes, siri what sort of situation do you
wanti"
"Well," said the Hoosier, tT'm not partic-
ular Pm out OF work, and almost any
thing'll do mt for a while"
eyes, well, can give you situation, If il
will suit you" and he made another deposit
in the handkerchief.
"Whst is il? What is to be done, and
what do you.give?" inquired the other.
"Wen,n was the answer, 81 want hands tc
chew rags into paper. and ifyou are willing ia
set in, you may begin at cnce."
"Good as the wheat" exclaimed the HooS-
ier, "hand over your rags"
"Here,' was the rejoinder, "take this hand.
terchief and commence with it,"
Hoosier saw the ''se!l," and quietly putting
the handkerchief lnt) his pocket, remarked a'
he turned 10 60 out:
"When Iget il che,oed, stranger, FH Jetei
il back k!m-IhdianapoH jour nal.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

uTSmlh and Brown, running opposite ways
round corner, struck each other.
"0h, dear |" said Smith, show you made
my head ring" "&s t
"Thats sign it's hollow" said B.
"Didn't yours ring" said Smith.
"No"
"Thars sign it's cracked"
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
portifal.
COME TO ME IN DREAMS.
by O D. PRENTICE.


Come TO me IN beautiful dreams, love,
oh come tame oft,
When the light wings of sleep,
On my bosom lies soft,
oh come when the sea,
In the moons gentle light,
Beats low on the ear,
Like the pulse of the night
When the sky aud the wave,
- Wear their lo7eIieN blue,
Wheuthc dew'aoh Tie ilower
And the star'son the dew.
Come in beautiful dreams, love.
Oh! come and we'll stray,
Where the whole year is crowned
With the blossoms of May
Where each sound is as sweet
AS the COO of a dove,
Aud the gales are as soft
AS the breathing Of love;
Where the beams kiss the waves
And the waves kiss the beach,
And our warm lips may catch
The sweet lesson they teach.
Come in beautiful dreams. love,
Oh come aud well fly,
Like two winged spirits
OF love through the sky!
With hand claspcd in hand
On our dream wings we'll 90.
Where the starlight and moonlight
Are blending their glow:
Aud on bright clouds we'll linger
Through long dreary hours,
Till loves angels envy
The heaven of ours.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

AwFULLY IN LovE.-A New England chap
went 10 California sometime ago and left his
gal behind. The George Law brought her
his first letter, which is actually said 10 CON-
prise one hundred and forty six closely writ
ten pages Of letter paper.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

GT"No one would take you for what you
are," said an old fashioned gentleman, a day
or two ago, 10 a dandy, who had more hair
than brains. f
"Why Z" was Immediately asked.
"Because they can't see your ears"
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

1--WE once heard rich man say, who was
badly injured by being run over
r'Itisn't the accident tbatI MUD; but the
idea Of being run over by an internal swill
cart, makes me mad..,
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

MA notorousy mean man having offended
a down-east yankee, was addressed by the
latter in long TRADE which concluded in The
following caustrc terms:
"Your little soul would have as much pay
in mustard pot, as pickerel in lake Erie,
and would rattle like kernel Of corn in q
harm TT
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

THE LAST INvENTioN.--The New Orleans
Su,, tells Of machine which hos been inven
led "out South" which enables man 10 te II
when he is getting too drunk 10 walk. II is
called fuddleomster, and gives timely warm
ing by hitting a fellow suddenly under the
short ribs the moment be has got enough.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

n1J The meanest man in the world lives in
West Troy. In helping him out OF the river
once, a man tore the collar OF his coat. The
next day hesued him for assault and battery.
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

rrGamboge, Interested in debate, asked
an ". G. il he had spoutedS
"Nol' replied the indignant honorable; al
get what money want OF the Sergeant.at-
Arms, without resoting TO pawlbtokers."
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21
Chr geHUlrat.

S publishedeyeTy Thursday ncrnini in.hf ID
Masonic Hail, second story OF the brick build
Rg west ofC. Vanauslal & Cos store, Main
Street, Eaton, Ohio, at the followingTa,es;
$3.50 peraAnum, in advance.
800: il mol paid within the year, and
$3.50 afteTthe year has expired.
GrThese rates will be rigidly enforced.
Nopaper discontinued until allarrearagessre
paid unless atthe option ofthe publisher.
D'No communication inserted, unless ac-
coDpanied by responsible name,
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

uJ"I say, Bill, Jim's Gagged for stealing a
horse"
"Sa,ved him right. Why didn't he buy
one and not pay for it, like any other gentle
mani" .l
Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1856-02-21

"soMEruN6 ElsE."-The Lynn News tells
good story Of two boys, one of whom was
Boosting of the beauties of his fathers house
'Ios got q cupola," said he, "and lis 60
ing 70 have something else"
"What is :" asked his interested compa-
MON.
"Why, Iheard father tell mother this NOR
ming, that IFS going to have mortgage on
III P'