The Nevada Democrat., 1856-10-22
WHOLE NO. 159.
One who died without Living.

NJ. Paul Legrand died at Dion, in Burgundy,
at the age of seventy-one, leaving the follow
ing memoir, whereby he proves that he has not
lived:
All that is suffering, sorrow, ennui, despair,
desire, regret, should be deducted from life,s be-
cause we should ourselves have deducted it had
heaven permitted. When three years old l was
weaned; at six could speak but badly; at seven
| split my skull; at nine was cured. | must
therefore extract nine years from my existence;
for surely to drink nurses sour milk, not to
speak, or badly, to split ones SKULL is not liv-
ing At the age of nine began my studles.-
Owing to my cracked skull, my head was hard
one, and proved stubborn to tuition. l re-
quired two years. labor to spell the alphabet.
l was indebted to letter z alone four score hun
dred lashes; the other twenty-three letters made
a complete martyr of me. AT the age of twelve
l could read, but my body was mangled with the
alphabet sears. An attempt was made to teach
me Latin, and l lost my French in the expert
ment At fifteen knew nothing at all, and
forced diet of bread and water had reduced me
to the condition of a skeleton. Six years more
had therefore to be deducted At sixteen my
father made me a notary's clerk. There COM
menced new species of martyrdom. | got up
at six, swept the office, lighted the stove, was
drubbed by the taller clerks, and my father
overwhelmed with complaints against me, de-
prived me of my dinner. This sort of life led
for five years. aud from life l will positively de-
duct them. At twenty my father, quite disgust
ed with his son, put me on board ship at Cher
bourg / washed the deck, Aept up the top
mast, mended the sails, and received thirty
lashes day on my back. This was endured for
four years. At twenty-four my father made me
haberdasher. / married Mademeiselle Ursule
DesVeusins, turner's daughter. Her portion
consisted of thirty thousand livres, mortgaged
upon a sugar estate in st. Domingo. The day
after the wedding / found out that my wife had
wooden leg, made by father-in-law, the turn
er. The poor woman made thousand apollo
gies for her infrmity, and pardoned her out of
regard to her marriage portion. The st. Do
mingo blacks rose against the whites and burnt
the marriage portion, and the wooden leg was
left to me. At thirty lost my wife in eonse-
quence of scrofulous disease in her real leg.
| spent six years of marriage repenting every
minute. What folly committed in taking that
leg! l therefore deduct these six years from
my life. Having, as everybody else, slept a
third part of my life, deduct "a years of sleep,
and am now below the right reckoning, for l
was a great sleeper. A year lost, adding min
ute to minute, in searching for the keys of my
desk, which was continually mislaying. Does
one live when he looks for key? Three years
lost in having myself shaved and powdered, &c.
Five years lost in suffering toothache, two infa-
nations of the chest, with relapses and conva-
lescence Three years lost in saying, whats
o'clock ~ 1--WE have bad weather to-day" show
do you do? chow is your lady?" II have
bad cold, !" Marlborough sen va-t-en guerre-
what mud in the street-what winter this
year ~ Six months lost in having the mud
brushed off one, and six in brushing ones hat
One year of endurance of the entire acts of the
theater. One year lost in listening to the mod
ern dramas, the chefd' oeuvre of genius not under
stood One year lost in complaining of salt
and tasteless soups, of outlets too much or too
undone of Indigestion or hard eggs. Total II
years, beg leave to declare that in giving up
the ghost do not give up any thing worth
keeping.