Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1855-06-06
For the Register
Obituary Notice.


Thursday. May Gath. 1855. the notorious,
political woodworking SAM" for
merly of Massachusetts. but more recent
ly, resident of this State, in the 18th
year Of his age.
The death of this remarkable individu-
al, though daily expected for the last three
months. has cast a deep gloom over his
friends and relatives, unen!vened by the
hope that his "like will ever be seen
again" Though the precise time of his
birth is unknown, and his parentage is
doubtful, yet from the most reliable infor-
nation that has reached US, he is sup>
posed to have been born at Exeter Hall
in London, whence, about the aye of man
hood, he inmigrated to the land of wood
en- uutmegs and horn gun flinIs," short
time before the war OF 1919. He is sup>
posed to be a lineal descendant OF the cele-
brated Benedict Arnold, and the natural
son Of the President Of the Hartford Con
vention, and Il cou-in german to the re-
nOwned "FRED DOUGLAS, REV. THOMAS
JAMES, ABBY KELLY, Henry WILSON," &c.
The deceased, in his lifetime, did not dis
grace his illusIrious ancestry, for he main
tanned and cherished to his last breath,
wv PlSS huu III " VIC 44U'1OIt NOt
zen ion. Early last autumn, he removed
tO the "OId Dominion" where he at once
collected aruund him all the elements OF
treason to her cherished institutions, and
became red-mUuthed, Boosting politi~
clan. and n noisy champion of the Protes-
:ant religion; which last position was very
singular, neither he. nor any of his nu-
merous family, had ever before exhibited
any such eccentricity; for it is we'll known
that they had e1punged from their deca-
logue the third, as we'll as the ninth COM
mandment.
Shortly after his arrival in Virginia,
"SAM" began to exhibit symptoms of the
disease which ultimately proved fatal
A severe attack OF FLArVLENcY, supposed
10 have been caused by swallowing the
aOindy articles and editorials. published in
the Richmond Wing" American Or
gen." and Cincinnati Times" was in a
great measure relieved by prescription
written by one Henry Il. Wise.
After this, SANS" health seemed toll.
erably re-established, until the sitting of
the late " Winchester ConventiCn."-
Shortly after the adjOurnment of that bo-
dy, he was again attacked with the same
, disease. which had now assumed chron
ic form, and otherwise Increased in MAJ
Lightly; and it soon became apparent thai
unless the initiation OF the OLD GENTLEMAN
could be promptly arrested, he MUST BURST!
To avert this calamity, every effort was
put forth by his friends, and with what Ell
feet the sequel will show.
Early on the morning Of the Gath OF
May, 1855, he called for his family and
his friends for the last lime, TO come to his
relief,
AND his ENEMIES CANE ALSO
During the whole night previous. he had
been restless and delIrious; muttering bro.
ken and incoherent sentences, few oil
which could De understood, but occasion.
ally were heard the names of "F- l-o-u.r>
n-o-y ]" B-e~a- lie !" "P-a-t-t-o-n l''-
uttering the last t,oo names, he shuddered
horribly. groaning 20! OIL! Hill! OIL"
About nine o'clock in the morning, SANS
friends and relatives began to assemble.
momentary JOY seemed to re>animate
the counLenance of the sufferer. By this
time the town was filled with the enemies
Of his race, who seemed to have lost all
regard Tor his distressing situation; for in
the streets, and al certain place, quite
| AIN0' no ~ ing SOuCuI Cdll6u Ln6 4 OtES,
they necessarily cried out, "W1sE Me-
CoMAs ! and BooocK !" This cry dis
tressed him greatly, and although his
friends at once stopped his ears with pies
ces Of the American Crusader" and Gin
cinnati Times" yet he still Leard it sound
ing as his deuth k1eI
About noon on that day, it became ap-
parent TO all that ''SAM'' could survive
but few hours. A wonderful change
now took place. His body, which had
been swollen to prodigious dimensions,
suddenly began 10 shrink-his rotundity
vanished-his comeliness departed-his
features became sharpened and horribly
distorted, so that his FRIENDS fed in, dis
gust, and be was left alone, 10 the ten
der mercies of the wicked" Democrats
His struggles now became. terrifc-for he
died hard. His enemies now gathered
around him-he was last sinking-hls
struggles became weaker-his voice faint
er. until it was no longer heard. AS the
sun went down, the cry of "WIsE. Nc
CoMAs and BocooK." was hushed.-
SAN again opened his eyes. but seeing
none but enemies, he instantly closed
Them, drew up his feet in the bed, straight
ened them out again. groaned heavily,
and gave up the ghost. j. B. ~,
Estate Agent for The Supreme Order of
the Star Spangled Banner"
P. S--"SAM's" obsequies will be per-
formed at the STATE HOUSE in Richmond,
Va. on The LIST day OF January. 1856. at
which time his WILL will be opened. The
friends and relatives of the deceased are
respectfully requested to attend his fune-
raj. Papers friendly TO the deceased. will
please copy. j. B. W., &c.
DA man by the nams of Pratt from Boston,
was run over by the cars and killed, four miles