The Hillsdale standard. [volume] (Hillsdale, Mich.) 1851-1909, 1855-01-23
Doesticks on New Years in New York.
Seventy hundred and one, Narrog ST.

pcr was having u iuAutiouS ttic ou oodiu
Mississippi steamboat--said boat being
fast aground on a sand -bar-provisions all
gone-the captain, steward. and one of
the bar-keepers being occupied in playing
/" poker with the passengers at one end
Of the boat, while the more piously dis
posed were listening to the drawing tones
of nautical preacher, who was discours-
ing secondhand sactimony at the other
crew all on bender" I" in the engine
room, fremen all drunk on the boiler deck,
and aad everybody generally enjoying
themselves. M .de no calls, myself, ex-
cept at the bar, where wished myself so
many happy New Years, and so many
compliments of the season that slept
that night on pile of cotton wood. and
when | attained my stateroom, next day,
l found each berth occupied by saddle
colored fireman, both with their boots on /:
one with my Sunday coat under his head
for pillow, his hair decorated with sun
dry Jumps of stone coal, and his red fan
mel shirt ornamented with the contents of
a tar-bucket, and the carpenters glue pot.
Since that eventful time, have become a
solourner in town, and on the approach
of New Years, had felicitated myself on
the prospect Of seeing how New Yorkers
celebrate this universal holiday
Intended to call on nv friends, and
hoped, as the number Of my feminine ac-
Qnaintances in this immediate vicinity is
small, to get through in time to spend the
afternoon at my new boarding house,
where Mrs Griggs, my landlady, and her
two daughters were to receive calls, and
who had invited me to be present and see
"t the elephant" as far as the proceedings
of the day should disclose to an unsophis-
ticated eye. his mighty and magnificent
proportions
Early in the morning, died my incipient
but dilatory moustache into visibility,
dressed myself as fashionable as the re-
sources of my limited wardrobe would
permit, and, attended by my fast friend
Sande Goalie, started on a journey, in
tending to " fetch up" eventually at my
boarding house, (" stopping at all the in
termediate posts by the way. A word
about my now-for :he- -first-time alluded to
friend Sandie. l have become much at
tached to him, from his strong resem-
blance in habits TO the t" fat boy of the
Pickwick papers. He sleeps euerywherc-
in the omnibus, on the ferry boat, in the
store, at the Post-O Office, in church, at the
theatre, and even while walking along
Broadway. l have known him stop twen-
ty-one stages in the course of an after
Moons walk by nodding at the drivers
while he was enjoying perihatetic nap.
The first time l saw him | was the hum
bio instrument of preserving his valuable
existence. He had started to 60 to the
Post Office TO mail an important letter,
but had fallen asleep in Nassau street, and
the bill stickers had nearly overlaid him
with show-bills, announcing that at the
Bowery Theatre would be played the
drama of the +" Seven Sleepers," to be
followed by the song We're all Nod
ding the whole to conclude with the
farce Grip Van Winkle"-in fact he
sleeps every where, except at table-opens
his sleepy eyes to the prospect of some
thing good To eat, and his wakefulness will
be insured until the uttermost morsel is
entombed in those regions of unknown
capacity to which he diurhally sends such
astonishing quantities OF provisions. His
internal dimensions have long been fa-
vorite theme of speculation to his friends,
but alas the problem must ever set at
defiance all the ordinary rules ofmensura-
ton. He has occasional ftc of spasmodic
piety, and then tries to read his Bible, and
invariably goes to sleep and lets it fall into
the ashes--aEd verify beIve, that though
his eternal salvation depended upon his
reading three chapters ofthe Gospel with
out having fit of somnambuIism, he
would go fast asleep before he had occom-
plished three verses however hoped
that the usual excitement of the occasion,
and the sight OF refreshments might keep
him awake; and 50 we started Went
to the Smiths, Thompsons, Tompkins.
Greens, Browns, Virgins, Robinsons, &C.,
in all these places there was The same
performance. without change Of pro-
gramme, give the formula Enter,
speak to the lady of the house =" happy
New Year" complmen.s-happy returns
take glass of wine with the ladies'
another of brandy, or punch with the
father--nibble little cake--exit--to be
repeated "dd HJertun,.'' AT Jones' they
had, on side-table, plate under a pla-
card labelled "for the poor "--anG every
visitor was expected to dropin contribu-
ton. Some malicious person has recol-
lected tnat the Joneses did the same thing
last year, and bis inconvenient and libel
Gus memory has also recalled the circum-
stance that soon after New Years the two
daughters of Jones had new silk dresses,
and Mrs. j. rejoiced in a new cloak and
hat Of the richest style and he says that
Braglcy, the broker, told him that on the
Sd Of January last, Jones go. some tens
and twenties of him in exchange for
small money, and made him give him two
per cent. over because so much Of it was
silver change--and, in fact, he insinuates
that as the money was "for the poor,
Jones voted himself as poor as any body,
and kept the procceds-and fumor whis-
pers that the Joneses won't have hay so
many calls this year as last because their
friends object to being taxed to pay their
bills. IA y 4 ia. -,
AT Snooks' we found the doors closed,