The Nevada journal., 1855-09-14
How the Boys ANNOYED a Dutchman.


called for, and Immediately both Barney and
fAichael responded. Both were boys about
thirteen years Of age, and both were Irish as
their patronymics would indicate, Barney had
! a|squnt eye and head which the irreyerent
youth OF America are accustomed to speak OF
as a "brick top His clothes were not alto
gether the style which would be pronounced au
fd,t by Broadway leader of the fashion. The
truth is that Barney had only one purpose in
view IN jumping into the said garments, which
purpose was not to create a sensation by either
the accuracy OF his form and to keep out the
cold at such times as the clerk of the weather
IS induced to fetch up cheated terms all stand
ing and gives us a specimen Of the temperature
which Is supposed to pervade the vicinity of
"Symmes' hole" Michael's appearance has
been very wells stated in our description of
Barney, except that Michael in all the partic.
ulars was a little more So.
Barney and Michael looked at the Judge
with eyes all agog wondering what next was to
take place.
''N here are the witncsses?" asked the Judge.
Il am de witness, said a voice outside of the
bar, and the speaker made his approach toward
the Judge. He was small man. compound of
gamboSe and chalk--the gamboge predomi-
mating. He was yellow. faced had yellow
hair, and was dressed in fyellow clothes. He
was favored with a dwarfed moustache
composed of twenty.eight yellow hairs and an
nclpient beard made of about seventy-fve
yellow hairs and turned out in the shape of a
triangle the base of Which was formed on the
point where the chin begins to retreat, and
the apex of which reached the middle of the
under lip.
Sir said the judge to the picturesque in
dlyidual, "these boys, Barney and Michael are
charged with disorderly conduct. What DO
you know about it ?"
'know 2" responded the yellow man, 81
knows all apout dem. Dey is de worst poys
as runs III the sthreets. Dey comes around to
mine Grocery koople O times de oder night
and ven | vas not looking dey ketch nv cat
by de dails ties wire crackers to de cats dali.
sets dem off and trows de cat in mine grocery
De cat runs all around on de counters, over in
to de parrels, tumbles over ebery dings dat is
in the way, and gets all de dngs sphltter
sphlatter mixed up togedder Ven | look for
mine cats about an hour, finds him rolled all
up all in a box of green beas nit all de hair
purned off from de pehind side fon his pqdy.
"When did the boys do this?" asked the
Judge.
Last Saturday night will be two weeks"
Well, that was some time ago Why did
you not have them arrested before?"
1t vas anodef ding for vat | had dem ar
resht by de coenstople. Two tree DAYS after
dat comes down shtares to open de door for
dc shtore. DE key vas in de door in de in,
side, and durns dem around to unlock dem.
and Just den hears Something's shoot off on
de oder side fom de door, | runs up shtairs.
for Ginks some teller wants to shoot me- and
| sends mine wife out to de odor door t see
who was dere. She says to me dat dere vas
no peoples dere, and so l goes down again to
unlock de door. durns de key quick as can
ven pop! crack. shoot. hears de noise again
1t fright me SO dat | falls over and pulls de
door by me. Ven | finds I vas not hurt
looks in de lock and finds some pieces of pa.
per dat vich you make dc little wife wire crack
ers-dat you call de-"
The Jndge suggested "torpedoes
Eyes, resumed the witness, "dorbedoes.'
''How do you know that these boys put tor
pedoes into your doorlock?'' inquired the
Judge.
81 know so veil as wants to know dat it vas
dem, replied the witness emphatically
Did You see them or has any dy else seen
them do it?' was the next question.
mo, did not see dem, but | know it was
dem; l can shwear dat it vas desc boys"
Your oath will not be regarded as of much
value under these circumstances. Have they
done anything else?'
" es, dey have done enough to send dem to
de State Brison. Ven l go out for minute
dey durns de spiggot for de lagerbier and vine
ger barrels and 1t all runs out on the floors
Dey calls me NIGHTS Cum Arouse old Sour
krout, sprech Deutsch;' dey finds dead rats and
trows dem on my awning, we're dey lay till we
shmell dem SO strong; dey brings parber's
pole and sets dem up by my grocery, and on de
bole vas bainted shaving done here, and de
beeples, ven dey see de sign dey laughs and say
good and it makes all de folks dnl dat cheat
dem; dey durn my boxes into the shtreet."
as that all?' asked the Judge.
"Mein Got is dat not enough?" asked wit
ness dispairingly.
Certainly it is, if you can swear that YOU
saw the boys do it, responded the Magistrate
81 can swear dey do it, but cannot shwear
see dem"
GLOW do you know them?"
"All the beeples say dey is de f3ers'
well. you must either bring some positive
proof Or | shall have TO discharge the bows"
"Nell, don't konw as | cai'do land the
yellow man left the Court disgusted with
American rules of evidence.
The Judge addressed the boys in the follow
ing language:
"You have escaped this time by the skin of
your teeth You are bad boys-l know you
are--whether you are the ones who troubled
the Dutchman or not. He was probably right
IN supposing you to be the author of his diff
cutles but he had no positive proof which
would warrant me in convcting you Of the
oftense charged. Now, if 1 let you of this
time will you cease prosecuting the proprictors
OF corner groceries in the future 2
Yes, Sir replied both of the boys, meekly.
Now go home. This is the first time have
seen you here-if | see you here again, LII send
you both to the House Of Refuge"
Yes, Sir" was the response, and the ofiea.
ders left the room.---.N. Y. Tribune.
The cradle is woHsans ballot-box.. So
says Lucy Stone. Some OF them put in two