The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1855-11-10
FEsNNlNEANS: or sLc,c;,c. md p.vr.
Ec~Iuca Nv .SOs,u PhUuix.

OF which 1t is impossible to cheat or deceive.
FtsaENlNEANt or Sketches and Eur.
tr>T"cs ey SOsin PhGmix.'
Tins rare and most amusing volume is in
the press Of Mcssrs Appleton 4 Company,
awaiting early publication. \ more complete
master of that species of wholesome satire
which is best conveyed by a drxtcrous use of
the broad burlcsqne, We have very seldom, if
ever, encountered. We proceed to give a
few specimens from the copy now in the
hands OF the printers. lie is acting as the
f"'7"-fcn'"S OF the proprietor and editor of
'he sac Di,qp (Iu|;fmniu) XruN, Hon.
jud ,e j. Jud>on Amcs. who is compelled to
be absent IN his official capacity. On taking
his temporary seat in the chair editorial, and
in the first number of the paper under his
management, he saws:
1t will be perceived that have not avail
ed myself OF the editorial pri, iege OF using
the plural moan in speaking OF myself This
Is SIMPLY bccaUs" ! consider 1t a ridirulou, af-
tcct,tIon. am a lone. lorn man. unnar-
rcd, (Ihe Lord bc praised for His infinite
mercy j and though blessed with a con,umjnc
appetite. which causes the Keepers OF the
house where board to trrmh, do not
think have tape worm therefore have
10 ocain to call myself We: and shalt .,y
no means tall INTO that editorial absurditv.'
Bat 1t seems, from the following, that he
dol Use the editorial plural noun, and in the
conduct of the Journal under his charge 50
compromised the Judge as a politician and
consistent editor that lumors became rife
that when the latter returned TO his po>t
there would bc trouble. The, were not with
out foundation, As witness the following:
! P"h!ic anxiety had been excited TO the
highest pitch To witness the result OF the meet
iIII ictWccn Us. n..,. -. g.. . . ~
that the Judge would whip US the moment
he arrived but although thought "A con
ilrt probable. We had never been very san
gene a. 10 lis terminating III this manner.
'Coollv we gaz,d from he window OF the
office upon thr New Town road We dcs-
cried a cloud o! dust in the distance: hich a.
love 1t waved a whip-la>h: ard we said ]:
The Judge comcth, and his speed is like
unto that of .Jchu the SON of Nlln>ni, for he
lrl,c,h tnriou>Iv
'Caimly We seated ourselves in our arm
char. and continued our labors upon our
magnificent Pictorial. Anon a s,cp-a
Mnrg >tcp-wa> heard upon the stair, and
the .Iai e stood before us
H. ~harc and rc-tur, r,ror,'v eminent. >.oo,;
Ike a over: hu' hi face deep sears OF
Thunder 'iJ lrcnrhc'!. and care >:.t on hi> l:dci
cheek hut under hr"w> "i !aunt,r>> cu,rlr, and
con>l,cratr pride, waiting revenge
We rose. and with an unialterinr voice.
SAID Well, Judge, how do Won ,!o:' H..
made no reply but commenced taking Oft
his coat.
! We removed ours also our cravat.
Inc sixth and last round is described hv
the prr>>man and comu">itor> as having been
f'arfulv scientific We held the ..Judce
down over the press bv our nose, which we
had inserted between his teeth for that pur
pose. ard white our hal: was employed in
holding one of his hands, held the other in
my left. and with the sheep '>-toot brandi>h-
ed above our head, shouted to him: Say
Waldo
Never" he gaspcd.
90 my, Higl'r,' he would have muttcrcl
l'u' that "A" 'drIedu up. ere the word uttered
At !hIS moment we discovered that we
had been aborIno under a misunderstand-
ing. and through the amicable Intervention
of the prcS>man, who thru,ta roller between
our faces. (Which gave the whole affair a
i, \ ,
tipallv settled on the most amicabIe
terms, without prejudice to the honor of ci-
ther party
We write this while sitting without any
outer clothing except our left stocking, and
the rim OF our hat encircing our neck like a
ruff OF the Elizsbethan era; that article
of dress having been knocked over our head
at An early stage of the proceedings, and the
crown subsequently torn off: while the
Judge is Sopping his eve with cold water in
the next room. a small tov standing beside
the sufferer holding basin, and glancino
with interest over the advertisements in the
second page Of the form, fair copy of which
was struck off upon the back of his shirt,
at the time We held him over the press
In his valcdictory. the ex-etlitor saws:
during the period in which | have had
control over the Uernld, ! have endeavered
to do my best TO amuSe and interest its rea-
ders. II have given offence TO anv persons
bv the tone Of my remarks. assure them
that it has been quite unintcntional and to
prove that bear no malice. | hereby ACCEPT
their apologies. Certainly 10 one can COM
PLAIN Of a lack of versatility in the last six
numbers. Commenting as an independent
journal, have gradually passed through all
The stages of incipient Whiegery. decided
Conservatism d,gniied Reclamation, budding
Democracy, and rampant Radicalism. and
now close the series with an entirely litera-
ry number.
And that literary number was the follow /
ing 'Niusrafed San D;ego Hrald,' a most
telling satire upon the first species Of illus
trated sheets which we're got out made up
of old English wood-cuts, of all kinds and
descriptions, the text adjoining which was
often crowded with the most ridiculous blum
ders We have seldom met with ANYTHING
so broadly Mrleccue ard utterly lauchable.