Smyrna times., 1855-08-29
Living by Ones Wit.

; Nine persons sailed from Basle down the
Rhine. A Jew, who wished to 90 to Schalam-
: pi, was allowed to come on board and Journey
with them on condition that he would conduct
himself with propriety, and give the captain
: eighteen kreutzers for his passage.
Now, it is true, something jingled in the
Jews pocket when he struck his hands against
it; but the only money there was therein was
a twelve kreutzer piece, for the other was
brass button. Notwithstanding this he accept
ed the offer with gratitude; for he thought to
himself, 4" something may be earned even upon
the water. There is many a man who has
grown rich upon the Rhine"
During the first part of the voyage, the pas
sengers were very talkative and merry, and the
Jew, with his wallet under his arm-for he did
not lay it aside-was the object of much mrth
and mOckery, as alas! is often the case with
those of his nation. But as the vessel sailed
onward, and passed Huntington and st. Veit
the passengers, one after the other, grew silent
and gazed down the river. until one spoke out
"Come, Jew. do you know any pastime that
Twill amuSe US! Your fathers must have con-
trived many one during their long stay in the
| Wilderness
"Now is the time," thought the Jew, "to
shear my sheeP!' And he proposed that they
should sit round in a circle, and PROFOUND very
curious questions to each other, and he, with
their permission, would sit down with them
Those who could not answer the questions
should pay the one who propounded them a
twelve-kreutzer piece; and those who answer
ed them pertinently, should receive twelve
kreutzer piece.
| The proposal pleased the company, and.
hoping to divert themselves with Jews wit or
stupidity, each one asked at randem whatever
entered his head.
Thus for example, the first one asked:
How many sotl-boilcd cggs.could the giant
Goliall cat upon an empty stomach"
| All said that ii was impossible to answer that
question, and the others paid him twelve kreut-
zers.
/ But the Jew said, One; for he who has
eaten one egg cannot eat second sone on an
empty stomach" And the others paid him
twelve kreutzers.
The second thought, wait Jew, and will
try you out of the New Testament, and l think
shall win my piece.
"Why did the Apostle Paul write the second
epistle to the Corinthians -
The Jew said; Because he was not in
Corinth, otherwise he would have spoken to
them" So he won another twelve kreutzer
piece.
When the third saw the Jew was so we'll
versed in the Bible, he tried him in u different
why.
/ "Who prolongs his work to as great length
as possible, aud yet completes it in timer"
"The rope-maker, if he is Industrious" said
the Jew.
In the meanwhile they drew near to a vii
lage, and one said to the other, "That is Bam-
lach." Then the fourth asked, ain what
month do the people of Bamlach eat the
least %
The Jew said, "In February, for that has
only twenty-eight days"
The fifth said, "There are two natural bro
theirs, and still only one of them is my uncle"
The Jew said, "The uncle is your fathers
brother, and your father is not your uncle"
A fish now jumped out of the water, and the
sixth asked, " What fish have their eyes near
est together !"
The Jew said, " The smallest"
The seventh asked, How can a man ride
from Base to Berne, in the shade, in the sum-
mer time, when the sun shines!'
The Jew said, "When he comes to a place
where there is no shade, he must dismeunt and
go on foot.''
The eight asked, 8, When man rides in the
winter time from Berne to Basle, and has for
gotten his gloves, how must he manage so that
) his hands shall not freezef'
! The Jew said, ''TIe must make fists out of
them"
The ninth was the last This one asked,
" How can five persons divide five eggs so that
: each man shall receive one, and still one re-
main in the dish !' -#
J The Jew said, The last must take the dish
with the egg, and can let 1t lay there as long as
he pleases." s....
But now it came to his turn, and he deter.
T mined to make a good sweep After many
9 preliminary compliments he asked, with an ali
u Of mischievous friendliness, " How can a mar
fry two tronts in three pans, so that a trout may
lay in each pant" 1.,' .''' . -.
: No one could answer this, and one after the
: other gave him twelve kreutzer piece slo.s
: But when the ninth desired that he should
answer il hirpself he frankly, acknowledges
4 that ho4 knew, not how the trout could be frieC
= in such wHye adi 5uoaza-Tdi ait'nT 1eeg.
I, I. DaTheh it was maintained that this was unfail
! in the Jew, but he strongly affirmed that ther!
= = was provision for it'i6the agreement, saw,
tlialt tllt hss Who could not answer the question:
should pay the kreutzers, aud he fulfilled th'
/. agreemAlt by paying ~ sum ou he ninth o