The Opelousas patriot. [volume] (Opelousas, Parish of St. Landry, La.) 1855-1863, 1855-11-10
THE PATRIOT.
,tfclAl JOURNAL OF the pAssA Of SAINT LANDRY
Bidtly nIaloney's Cat.
from the San Francisco Wide West

The cabin"
aCsst her ont, thin, an don't be botherin
me about the baste."
nFsix, an I've been shrivin' to do TINT
same for the matther of tin mints past but
she's list beyant my rache, behint the big rid
cbist in the corner. Will yez be after helpin
me dbriye her out, Mat
"To be sure will, bad luck to the consate
sbe has for me house show her to me, Biddy,
till tache her the rispict that's due a man in
his own house-to be takin' possession widout
as much as by yer lave, the thafe O. the world !"
Now Mat had special antipathy.for cats.
and never let pass an opportunity to kill one.
This he resolved to do in the present case, and
instantly formed plan for the purpose. Per
ceiying but one mode of egress for the animal.
he says to Biddy-
Have yes iver male bag in the house, mo
darlint2"
"Divil n wan is there, Mat Yez Tux it TO
the mill wild yez to bring home chips wild, this
mornin."
"Faix, an I did. and there it is yit, thin.
Well have yez nothing at all in the house that
will tie up like bag, Biddy?"
"Troth, an have Mat; there's me Sunday
pftticoat- t-ye can dhraw the strings close at tile
ton an sure it will do bether nor lettin the cat
be LAWN yez."
"Biddy, darlint. vez jewel to be thinkin'
O that same be afther bringin' it to me-"
Biddy brought the garment, and when the
strings were drawn close it made very good
substitute for the meal bag, and Mat declared
twas " Elegant"
So holding it close against the edge of the
chest be took look behind and saw q pair of
hr;pht ovoe o,1o ripp of hin,
"An' is it there ye are, ye divil? Be out o.
that now bad luck to ali yer kin, We thayin'
vagabone ye. Bedad an We won't lave me
house at ali wild perlite akin, Yer silewill vii
bates pigs intirely Biddy, have ycz any
hot wather in the house?"
"Yis, I've plinty, Mat the tay kettles
fall Of it."
"Be afthcr castin' the matthcr Of quart
thin behint the chist till I say how the shay
dvil likes it."
"Hould i'm close, Mat; here goes the
wnther"
Dash went the water and out jumped the
animal into Mats trap.
Arrah, be the hewly poker I have i'm in,
Biddy," says Pat, drawing close the folds of
the garment; now bad cess to yez. yc thafe,
its nine lives ye have is it? Be after akin
me forgiveness for the thavin' ye have been
doin' in me house, for I'm thinkin' the nine
lives ye have won't save ye now any way.
Biddy saize hoult of the poker an whin iii
shoulder the haythen yell beat the daylights
out of 'im."
Mat threw the bundle over his shoulder, and
told Biddy to play "St. Patrick's day in the
morning on it. Biddy struck about three
notes Of that popular Irish air, and suddenly
stopPea exclaiming-
What smils SO quare, Mat? It's takin'
me birth away wild the power NV it. Och
murther, Mat, shure an ye have the diyil in
the sack"
"Bate the ould haythes, thin yez ill niver
have better chance. Bate the horns off i'm
iather i'm like blazes, me darlint!"
Augh," says Biddy, i" I'm faintin' wild the
power Nv i'm. Cast i'm off yez, Mat"
"Howly st. Pather j" says Mat, throwing
down the sack. "Biddy, the baste is a pole
satl Lave the house, or yez ill be kilt in
trely. Murther an turf how the haythen
smills! Och, Biddy Maloney, purity kittle
Nv fish yez made Nv it, to be shure, to be mis-
taking that little divil for harmless cat"
:" Mat, for the love NV God, if yez be con-
vanient to the door, be afther opening it, for
I'm narely choked wild i'm. Och, Biddy Ma
!oney, bad luck to yez for lawn ould Ireland,
10 90 murthered in this way! Howly Mary
purtrict me! Mat I'm clane kilt intirely
take me out NV this |"
Mat drew her out of doors, and then broke
!or the pump like quarter-horse, closely fol-
lowed by Biddy.
\, "Shure, that little villain bates the divil in
urely he's ruined me house an kilt Biddy,
an put me out O. consate wild meself for
month to come. Och, the desaivin' vagabone,
oad luck to 'im," and Mat plunged his head
INTO the horse-trough up to his shoulders.
yet out o. that, Mat, I'm narely blind"
and ;Biddy went under water. "Och, the
murtherln' baste," says Biddy, sputtering the
wa!sr out Of her mouth, tine best petticoat is
spout intirely. Mat Maloney, divil trap will
= Ner help yez sit for a cat agin."
Don't throuble yersilf, Mistress Maloney,
yeve played the divil as it is. Niver fear me
aSlnn q ha'porth O. yer assistance. It's
oathral fool ye are to be takin' baste Nv
pole-cat fur house cat
Mat and Biddy went cautiously back to the
caoln from which the offensive quadruped had
@ken his departure. Things were turned out |
o doors, Biddy's petticoat buried, the bed,
welcn fortunately escaped, moved to near
helghbor's, the stove moved outside and for a
week they kept house out of doors, by which |
nme, by dint of scrubbing, washing and airing.
.ne house was rendered once more habitable, but
q neither Mat nor Biddy have forgotten the
strange cat"
Judge W., who still occupies an honorable
position upon the supreme bench at Michigan,
could, if he chose, tell some good stories of his
sariy Jurisprudence in the interior of the State