The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1855-11-15


suit was, that l soon found Peter kne'
actually nothing beyond the simple us
of the shovel. With that instrument
was truly dexterious. Horses he coul
neither feed, clean nor manage. L
plouging he was positively SO awkwar,
that, instead of guiding firmly the handle
of the plow, he pushed them forward will
all his strength, trotting along all th
time by the side of the furrow; and, in
stead of cutting his furrow slices straigh
and of an even depth, he ran them il
and out in the crookedest way imagina
BILE, while the depth of plowing undulat
ed from two to eight inches.
These experiments convince me of Pc
ter's incapacity, so, from thencefortb,
kept him employed at ditching, or in the
garden, or in performing light Offices fo,
the household.
One day, having occasion to get tc
town, 1 called him to me.
Peter" said l, II think my carriage
runs heavily. 1t wants greasing Can
you do it,"
"Sure, sir" said he, "what'ud I be
good for if couldn't! Is it erase a car.
riage? Faith, that's asy enough any way"
Easy as it is, Peter. I am half afraid
to trust you to do it. You make SO many
blunders. Perhaps, after all, had bet
ter 60 with you and see it DONE"
Oh,wirra, ,wirra! did I iver hear the like
o that! What 'ud you. be goin' forl
Sure | know"
"Ah, but Peter, recollect what you
said about the ploughing"
"Begorra!" said Peter, nothing abash-
ed, "It's all the fault of the plouchs in
this country any how. Them's the con.
trairiest things that liver broke poor
divils back; an that's no lie."
"And the horses too, Peter, that you
knew SO much about"
"It's Ameriky bastes they are," said
Peter, "would yer honor understand l.
rish, at first, if ye wint across in the Ould
eountry?"
I shook my head.
"Sure, thin, that's the way it was"
said Peter, triumphantly. "If real
gintleman, like yer honor, could mt und.
therstand Irish, is it brute bastc that
has the farming to know it before tache
him!"
"Well, well; but about the carriage"
"Bedad ye needn't trouble yourself a.
bout it at all There's mighty little diff
fer in the carriages, I see, ali the wurld
over"
''Be careful, then, Peter; and grease it
we'll, do you hear?"
"Faix, I'll do that same thing. I'll be
plazing yer honor this time, any way"
An hour passed, and I waited impati-
emily for the carriage. Once or twice I
saw Peter pass the window with the slush
basket in his hand, and l began to won
der what took him to the kitchen so often.
At length hailed him, to know if the ve-
hicle was not almost ready,
"Ayeh" said Peter, "would ye have me
spoil purity piece of work! It's little them
naygurs know about grasing anything,
the haythens!'
"But you are SO long, Peter, 1 had bet
ter come and see about it myself"
FAX! an there's no need. Yer honor
shall have it fornist the dure in no time"
"Well make haste, then, for 1 am in
hurry"
1t might have been fifteen minutes af-
ter this that Peter knocked at the door.
"Will | put the horse in sir?"
Certainly, if you can. Is the carriage
ready?"
"Och, sure but it's beauty? Would
your honor come and look at it,"
"Draw it out, l will be there directly"
Peter went of, and was in the act of
finging open the doors of the carriage
house as | approached.
"There, sir" said he, pointing to the
carriage in evident admiration. "Did
yer honor iver see the like O. thatl"
why what on earth have you done to
"Grascd it, sure, Elegantly! Bedad,
but it takes the shine, anyhow!"
| never felt SO angry in all my life;
and yet, the whole affair, combined with
Peters conscious Importance as if he
prided himself in having done q good
thing, was SO ludricious that 1 soon be-
came undetermined whether to laugh or
storm.
There stood my new carriage creased
al over with slush, or what is commonly
called in the country soap fat; not only
he leather curtains, but the top, the body
5he running gears, and even the shafts
and swingletree, literally one shining
mass of unsavory grease. And there
stood Peter, with his hat cooked know
ngly on one side of his head, his arms
nkimbo, and bis eyes travelling from mine
% his work, with look of the most in
,ense satisfaction. The axles we're left
Peter Mulroony never creased car
'iage for me after that day.
Thrilling Adventure with Lion.