The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1855-08-29
A Little too Punctual.
BY THE OLD 'UN.

The hour was approaching for the de-
parture of the New Haven steamboat
from her birth at New York, and the
usual crowd of passengers, newsboy's
fruit venders, cabmen and deck loafers,
were assembled on and about the boat.
We were gazing at the motley group,
from the foot of the promenade deck
stairs, when our attention was attracted
by the singular action of a tall brown
Yankee, in an immense wool hat, choco-
late colored coat and pantaloons and a
fancy vest. He stood near the star board
paddle box, and scrutinized sharply every
female who came on board, every now
and then consulting an enormous silver
bulls eye watch, which he raised from the
depths of capacious fob, by means of a
powerful steel chain. After mounting
guard in this manner, he dashed furious
ly down the gang plank and up the wharf,
re-appeared on board almost instanta-
neously, with flushed face, expressing
the most intense anxiety. This series of
operations he performed several times,
after which he rushed about the boat,
wildly and hopelessly calculating:
whats time er day? Wonder if my
repeater's fast? Whar's the cap'n? Whar's
the steward !? Whar's the mate? Whar's
the boss that owns this ship?
whats the matter, sir," we ventured
to ask him when he stood still for mo-
ment.
"Hain't seen nothin' of gal in blue
sun bonnet with a white Canton Grape
shawl, (cost $l5,) pink gown and brown
boots, hey? come aboard while I was
lookin' for the cap'n at the pint end of the
ship-have ye? hey?"
"No such person has come aboard"
"Tormented lightning! she's my s0!ten'
he screamed: married yesterday. All
her trunks and mine are aboard, under a
pile of baggage as tail as a Connecticut
steeple. The darn'd black niggar says
he can't land it out, and won't leave my
baggage anyhow. My wife-only think
of twas to have come aboard at hall
past 4, and here it is almost 5. What's
become of her? She can't have eloped
You don't think she's been abducted, dc
ye mister? Oh! Pm ravin distracted
What are they ringing that bell for? Ii
the ship afre!p
"It is the signal for departure-the
first bell. The second will be rung in
four minutes" T"
/ "Thunder! you don't say SO! Whar's
the cap'n 2"
"That gentleman in the blue coat"
The Yankee darted to the captain and
said:
"Cap'n stop the ship for ten minutes
won't ye? 8
"Can't do it, sir.''
"But We must tell you. I1lpay yor
for it. How much will ye taxi"
"I could not do it."
"Cap'n I'll give ye tew dollars" gasp
ed the Yankee.
The Captain shook his head.
"I'll give you five dollars and a half
and half and halfl-and half!-
and half !" he kept repeating, dancing
about in his agony, like mad jackass OF
hot iron plate.
/ "The boat starts at FIVE precisely" sale
the captain shortly turning away.
go! You Sunny hearted heathen!'
murmured the Yankee, almost bursting
into tears. "Partin' man and wife, ant
, we just one day married"
At this moment the huge paddle wheel
began to paw the water, and the walkin!
beam descended heavily, shaking the hug
fabric to her center All who were no
gong to New Haven went ashore. Th
hands began to haul in the gang plank
the fasts are already cast loose.
"Leggo that plank % roared the yam
kee, collaring one of the hands. "Drol
it like hot potato, or I'll heave ye int
the dock /"
"Yo-yo!' shouted the men in choru
as they heaved on the gangway.
} "Shut up you braying donkies!" yelle,
the maddened Yankee, cor there'll be al
ugly spot of work" ".
But the plank was got aboard, and tn
l boat plashed past the pier. s4 sa
In an instant the Yankee pulled off hi
; coat, flung his hat beside it on deck, an,
: rushed wildly to the guard.
: "Are you drunk or crazy?" cried
: passenger, siezing him. asa
> "I'm goin' to fling myself into the doe
l and swim ashore" cried the Yankee.
mustn't leave Sairy Ann alone in Ne,
{ York city. You may divide the baggag
t among you. Let me go! I can swim.
/ He struggled SO furiously that the con
sequences of his rashness might have bee
fatal, had not sudden apparition chang
, ed his purpose. A very pretty youn'
woman in blue bonnet, white Canto
g Grape shawl, pink dress and brown boots
came towards him.
: The big brown Yankee gave one sten
e torian shout of "Sairy Ami" clasped he
in his arms, in spite Of her struggling
S and kissed her heartily, right before a
+ the passengers. -
"Where did you come from ?" be in
e quired. stfe - ~
From the ladies' cabin,v answered tn