Raftsman's journal. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, 1855-04-25

The pumpkins was chopped. And 'twant
the pumpkins neither that choked her. Twas
the tray-and the end ont is sticking out of
her mouth now
ugh! ugh! There goes my bread-tray. No
longer ago than yesterday 1 told you that the
COW would swallow that tray
THE DIFFERExCE.-Abla black man once came
TO Philadelphia, and attended church. lie
went into a good pew, and the next neighbor
asked the man who owned it, why he put a
niger into his pew ?''
sWhy, sir, he's Haytien.''
Cant help that-he's black -
.sWhy, sir, he's a correspondent Of mine.''
s.Can't help that-he's black!''
Giles worth million OF dollars
s.Introduce me.''
g..Hold yer tongue, Judy; yo kape up
such blathering wild yer potaty thar, that
cant hear meself think at all.'' 'sOch,' re-
torted Judy, 'an' it's yer purity self that kapes
up 4 deal Of dhrinlin' which l take to be your
thinlsin' it would be dale better for the gos-
soons and Ineself, who can't niYer git a taste
OF the craturc, so absorbed do ye become wild
it, that ye can't answer a question for fear iv
its chokin' ye.''
--<----s-ESe> ,-s-----
~Thc Panama Star in giving the incidents
Of the recent earthquake there, says: s'One
patriotic individual rushed to the consuI's res
idence and claimed the protection Of his flag.
In vain friend told him he would be no safer
there-that earthquakes respect no flag. s'I'H
be id fit shant ours, thought he replied.
of any earthquake dare touch the flag, the
whole Union would raise to put it down.
-~-ee1~----
CoAxING THE BEAR.-'.My love- said Mrs.
Foozle to her husband, sEoblige me with five
dollar note to-day, to purchase new dress
'sShan't do any such thing, Katc--you call
ed me a bear, yesterday
'Lor, love, that was nothing, meant that
you were fond of hugging.''
s.You little, have no FIVE, but here's
a ten."
Og-A farmers wife, in speaking Of the
sinartncss, aptness, and intelligence other son,
a lad six years of age, to lady acquaintance,
.:Ilc can read fuenuy in any part of the Bible,
repeat the whole catechism, and weed onions
as we'll as his fdther''-s.Yes, mother,'' added
the young hopeful, 'sand yesterday I licked
Ned Rawson, throwed the cat into the well and
stole old Hickley's gimlet.''
->--
% The following dialogue we overheard
the other day between two Juveniles:
- say, Bill, who do you go for, for Presi-
dent ?''
"Why, Sam Houston, Of course
ssWhat d 0 you go for him for? Did he ev-
er give a fellera cent to buy stick of candy2''
'sNo! bat he gave Santa Anna particular fits,
and he'll give old logy politicians blue blazes
ifthey don't get out of his way.''
-
w Bridget, where is Mr. Ludlow's boot
jack2
please marm-little William has got it in
the mudgutter playing ship with it!'
Tell him to bring it in instantly
He says he won't, marm-cause why it has
just started for Jersey with load of clam
Shells and a broken brick
u A newly married couple, some years
since, took mp their abode in place named
Poplar. At breakfast next morning the gen
tleman said to his lady, my dear, this is Pop
lar, and by putting in (you) it becomes pop
ular.' "And by putting as in it. promptly re-
piled the lady, it viii become populous!
0y ''Mary, where's the frying pan gone?''
''Jemmy'S got it, carting mud and clam-shells
up the alley, with the cat for horse.'' 'sThe
dear little fellow what genius he will make;
but go and get it. We're going, to have COM
pany, and must fry some fish for dinner''
10 'Biddy, has that surly fellow cleared off
the snow from the payementl'
'Yes-sir.'
Did he clear it off with alacrity, Biddya'
NO, sir; with shcUeI.' 5,t
10 There's woman at the bottom of ev-
cry mischief said Joe.
'Yes,' replied Charles, .when 1 used to get
into mischief, my mother was at the bottom of
me- t
u A Shirt made with the magnetic needle
and the thread of parsons discourse, will be
exhibited at the Worlds Fair, in Paris
--o>
10 Some slandering old bachelor says it is
much joy when You first get married. but it is
more jswy after q year or SO.