Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1855-01-04
GALLIPOLIs. OHIO. JANUARY 4.-Is55

mand the father come--interesting con.
versation-old man in trouble-lost all
his money betting on q horse race; and
had Just pawned his coat and spare
shirt TO get money to-set himself up in
business again, as pop corn merchant
I-(Dsmphool sunk down exhausted,
and borrowed the brandy bottle. Dis
consulate widow gets a communication
from her husband that he is a great deal
happier now than formerly-don't want
to come back to her-no thank you
would rather not. Old maid inquiries il
husbands are plenty-to her great Joy
is informed that the prospect is good.
Little boy asks if when he gets into the
other world he can have long tail coat
mother tells him to shut up-small
boy whimpers, and says that he always
has worn a short jacket, and he expects
when he gets to Heaven, he'll be bob
tail Angel.
Damphool's attention to the bottle
has treasured his spirits, he is easily
affected by brandy-one glass makes
him want to treat all his friends-when
he has two bumpers in he owns great
deal of real estate, and glass No. 8
makes him rich enough to buy the Gus
tom House, and he now ventures an
other inquiry of his relative, who shuts
him up, by telling him as soon as he
gets sober enough to tell Maiden Lane
from lighthouse, to go home and go to
bed.
Went at it myself; inquired all sorts
of things from all kinds of spirits,
"black spirits and white, red spirits and
grey" Result as follows: By means
of thumps, knocks, raps and spiritual
kicks, l learned that Samson and Her
cules have gone into partnership in the
millinery business, julius Cesar is ped
ling apples and molasses candy. Tom
Paine and Jack Shepard keep billiard
table. Noah is running canal boat.
Xerxes and Othello are driving opposi-
ton stages. George Sd has set up
caravan, and is waiting impatiently for
Barnum and Kossuth to come and go
halves. Dow, Junior, is boss of
Methodist camp meeting. Napoleon
spends most of his time playing penny
"ante" with the three graces. Benedict
Arnold has opened large bier saloon,
and left vacancy for S. A. Douglass,
(white man. John Bunyan is clown
in circus. John Calvin, DR.. Johnson,
Syksey, Plutarch, Rob Roy, Davy
Jones, Gen. Jackson, and Damphoors
grandfather, are about establishing a
travelling theatre, having borrowed the
capital, 1.-TWO per cent. month )-they
open with, "How to pay the Rent
DR.. johnson in fancy dance; to con-
clude with Widows Victim" the prin-
cipal part by Mr.. Pickwick. Jo Smith
has bought out the Devil. and is going
to convert Tophet into Mormon Para
disc. Shakespeare has progressed in his
new play as far as the fourth act, where
he has got the hero seven miles and
half up in a balloon, while the disconso-
late heroine is hanging by her hair to
limb over precipice; question is how
the heroic lover shall get down and res
cue his lady-love before her hair breaks,
or her head pulls of.
Spirits now began to come without in
vitation like Paddles to wake. Soul
of an Alderman called for clam soup
and bread and butter. Ghost of a |
newsboy sung out for the Evening Post.
All that was left of Bowery fireman
wanted to know if Forty had got her
butt fixed, and new inch and half
nozzle. Ghost of Marmion wanted a
dish of soft crabs, and called out after
the old fashion. to charge it to Stanley.
Medium had by this time lost all control
over her ghostly company. Spirits of
walters, soldiers, tailors, (Damphool
trembled, babies. saloon keepers, dan
GERS, actors, widows, circus riders, in
fact all varieties of obstreperous spirits,
began to play the devil with things gen.
orally; the dining table jumped up,
turned two somersets, and landed with
one leg in the widows lap. one in Dam
ohool's mouth, and the other two on the
'OSS Vi Tic sduCIHOulOuS iOOhluB lnul-
yiduals opposite; the washstand ex-
libited strong symptoms of desire to
lance the Jenny Lind Polka on Bull
Doggie's head; the bookcase beat time
with extraordinary vigor, and made
aces at the company generally; our
Walking canes and umbrellas promen-
Ided round the room in couples, without
he slightest regard to corns, or other
,eddal vegetables; while the bedstead in
he corner was extemporizing comic
ong, with vigorous accompaniment
IN the soap dish, the was bowl, and
'ther bed room crockery.
Bull Dogge here madea rush at the
loor, and dashed wildly down Broad
way, pursued, as he AYERS to this day,
'y the spirit of an Irishman with a
a handsaw. and ghostly
Concluding / had seen
enough, l took Damphool, and B. DIS {
bottle, (empty, or he would never have I
eft it, and went home, satisfied that
there are more things in heaven and
.arth than are dreamed Of" except by |
ying ''msdiuns," so-cslled: who, too {
azy TO work; and too cowardly to get {