The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1855-05-09
Noah B-was unfortunate enough in his

Noah B-was unfortunate enough IN his
old age to become addicted to rather strong
rotations. and when under the influence o.
spirits was more than usually religious. Now,
on Saturday afternoon, baking day, his wife,
who was a very industrious old lady, and IN
every Way a model housewife, asked Noah to
come into the yard and split some wood to
| heat the oven with. Noah concluded before
be set about it, to start off to the tavern and sim
| bibe,' whereby, of course, the baking was neg
/ lected. Coming back in short time, and
utterly oblivious of his good woman's request,
| he seated himself in the old chair. Noah was
very much attached to that old chair, for Ike
him, age had made it lettering in the legs and
somewhat weak in the back. Wife," said he,
| "wife, do you think the Lord in his goodness
(hic) kin send us into the fire everlasting!-
Mrs. B-this time made no answer. "Wife,
(hic do you think the Lord means (hic) to burn
US ali (hic) in fire everasting'?' This was
more than human patience could endure, and
she could not hold her tongue any longer; she'd
sneak out if she died for it: "No! yer old fool,
yeri not if he waits for you to split the wood!''
Dearest, l will build thee cot all covered
with ivy, in some secluded vale, close by a
purling brook, meandering over its pebbly
bottom, necessarily babblng, in duleet, tink
ling strains love, love, love- where the atmos
phere is redolent of soothing, spicy aromas,
that makes the eyes Ianguish, and the heart
dissolve in the liquid fire OF love; where the
baimy morning zephyrs sigh in the dense for
est's leafy maze, counting loves melody; and
where the tiny songsters that whirl in ethereal
space MARBLE nought but love. I will plant
thee garden of gorgeous loneliness, culled |
from natures most ardent designs, and sweet
smelling incense" -.a ....
"Dophy, dear, don't forget to leave patch
to plant cucumbers and inguns-they so
nice pickled.'
II man, according to law, would give an
other an orange, instead of saying Il give you
that orange which one would think would be
what is called in legal phraseologE, "an abso-
ute conveyance of all right and tile therein
the phrase would run thus:-''1 give you all
and singular my estate and interest, right, title
md claim, and advantage of and in that orange,
With all its rind, skin, juice and pulp and pips
Ill right and advantage therein, with full pow {
n TO bite, cut suck, or otherwise eat the same,
,r give the same away, as fully and etiectuaily ,
is |, the said 4. B., am now entitled to bite,
ut, suck, otherwise eat, the same orange, or t
i've the same away, with or without its rind. a
kin, juice, or pulp, and pips, anything hereto
ore or hereafter. or in any other deed or deeds,
instrument or instruments of what nature or a
ind soever to the contrary in anywise not p
with much to the same effect.
In a crowd. looking at the body of a man p'
illed on a railroad, fat Dutchman remark
d, In the midst of life We are in det.' 4 st
On of the Emerald isle standing by, answer "
i Of fDrh 1F
wed me two dollars &
A blind fiddler playing to company, and :
laying but scurviIy, the company laughed at
i'm; the boy who led him, perceiving 1t, said, -
Father, let us go-they do nothing but laugh W W
vou." "Hushr' said the father, 1--WE shall B.
ave the dimes presently, and then we'll laugh GO
them" 60
When you have read enough to have ac- CT
tired the habit of reading without suffering Ri
ur mind to wander, and when you can sue We
ssfully bring to bear upon your subject lat
eat share of previous knowledge, you may
en- read with rapidity; before that, as you o ou
We taken the wrong road, the faster you ne
oceed the more you will be sure to err.
"Why don't you hold up your head as / ev
?" asked an aristocratic lawyer of sterling
farmer. esquire said the farmer, look "
that field of grain. You see all the valua-
heads are bowed down, while those that
We nothing in them stand upright" The /
yer sloped. be
1t is aggravating TO see good looking man
estling with your wife in waltz, without
wing the privilege Of going up and tighten
his neckerchief.
A slave has but one master-the ambitious
n has as many masters as there are persons
ose aid may contribute TO his advancement.