Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1855-12-26
DVUIIU IIt norm,
Fer Cuba and for Oregon. ,

| ly- The only cure for love is a shilling
worth OF poison taken inwardly.
LEA woman, charged with being drunk
and dIsorderly, denied the latter charge, saw
ing that she was too drunk to be disorderIy.
Iy7 An acute Anglican angle tn at enables
you TO cross street so as not TO run against q
| creditor.
Eg The Salem Gazette says the following
notice may be seen at a blacksmithis shop in
Essex: mo hOsses shod on Sunday cent
| Sickness or Deth."
- Why is associating with bad cbaracto-s
NC getting leg crushed during the dog
uays because it is apt to lead to " mortif-
Eg@" Have you said your prayers, John ?''
prayers, and L the amens We agreed TO 40
IL, because 1t comes shorter"
lg The old gentleman who undertook 70
take the twist out of the Maelstrom, has gone
out West to whitewash the Rocky Mountains.
lie goes in for large jobs.
E UnpOpular-Quarrelsome women. rainy
days, and those dirty-faced boys who are con-
unuaily boring you about " that little bilI''
that you owe to Mr.. Grip.
[I5@ The chap who took the thread Of I;6.
to sew the rent of his house, has gone West,
and invented patent point for cross-eyed
lg7 Says the lovely Julia TO the begitchfnr
fanny, why Is new baby like cows taiIlS
Fanny blushed as she answered. 0because II
was never seen before"
Eg Ignorance and cruelty are as eloseIv
connected as Damon and Pythias. Who ever
saw a dog fighter who did not spell philosophy
with an "F!" We pause for a reply.
E The dentists generally have acknoWl
edged their business to be gum game mas
much as they are using gutta percha TO set
their artificial teeth in
Eg9A man who don't take newspaner is
not only poor but will always remain so. The
less men know, the less they earn Folks who
labor for seventy-fye cents day, always sign
their names with an Y.
E The last case Of Incidence is related IN
9heOi our exchanges, 1t Is that Of man named
John Hole, who was so lazy, that In writin,,
his name, he simply used the letter J. oni
then punched hole through the paper,
S"I understand your father is dead
said man to little boy, as he entered the
house. you re right now, old hoss, I" said he.
hes laid out in tOther room as cold as a
WEDGE"
UT A Western editor in speaking ofone of
the newly-elected Senators, says that his TO-
norance is SO dense, that the auger of common
sense will be longer in boring through il. than
1t would take boiled carrot to bore through
Mont Blanc.
II The individual who tried to clear HE
conscience with an egg, is now endeayoring IN
raise his spirits with yeast If he fails in
TINS, 1t rs his deliberate intention to blow out
his brains with a bellows, and sink calmly in
to the arms of a young lady.
I A certain newspaper in CleveIand
Ohio, having advertised that they would send
a copy of their paper gratis for one wear. To q
person who would send them a club often. re-
celyed the te'a-spOt Of clubs from a young lady
In the country.
Ia An Imaginative Irishman gave utter.
anGe 10 thls iamentation: " L returned to the
halls Of my fathers by night, gand | fund
them In ruins l eried aloud, NY fathers,
where are they and echo responded. is that
you, Patrick M'Glathery?'"
~ The Dutehman whose refused 10 take O
one dollar bill because it might be aI,HrfS
IRON ten, prefers stage travelling to rail-
road. The former, he says, rides him eight
him one. ON' i'Nss