Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1855-09-27
Doesncks, Instigated by DamphoOl and the
Devil, Joins the Know-Nothings.

Knowing more about selling groceries than
about politics or religion, but was scared 10
death by Damphool and Others of his kin and
name; told me if didn't join the Know Moth.
ings Id burst up, be broiIed on gridrons by
the Catholics; also, that The Irish burned ma
tives, then fricsseed them as choice foreign
lunch; didn't like 10 be burnt or frcaseed;
told them I'D join.
Started at 10 o'clock at night, went down
town, then up town; met watchman; Dam
phool and be turned round three times, then
stood on one leg; Damphool then said-"Ilo-
rum Scorum;" watchman said, 'Highcatalarum,
go ahead; 'Damphool said wachman was one
Of 'em. Went through seven back streets,
then along cross street 10 near where we start
ed; divided down celler steps door; Dsmphool
whoo whooed like on owl three times, knock.
ed door nine times; somebody inside SQualled
like tom cat twice, knocked door three times,
door opened; dark as Egypt; tied handker.
chief over my eyes; another door opened, rat
ling OF chains and strong smell of supher;
thought my time had come, and tried 10 pray,
couldn't think Of anything but "now lay me
down 10 sleep" They led me in, threw me
down on all fourS, hit me nine cracks with q
paddle on unmentionable place, stuck two pins
in the same, blated like billygOat, then gen
e!al cateTwauling by the whole cOmpany.-
Raised me up and took Off handkerchief, saw
large crowd with FOOLS caps on, big ears stick
ing up. Big picture hanging on the wall,
Christ cruc6ed; underneath in large letters
the words, "the work OF CathoIicS;" thought
before twas the Jews, wasn't certain now;
Damphool led me up 10 the man with biggest
ears of any, behind table; made me kneel
down; man with the biggest ears said, "You
| colo La, toIJ II 4 20
thing; don't know what did swear, was SO
scared. Man with big ears told NE wcS a
member of the transient and honorable order OF
Know Nothings made him bow, told him
was much obIeeged, and took seat. Song by
the whole house:
"POSsum up gum stump,
RaccOon in q hOller." &c.
After the song, The man with the big ears OF
fered up q short prayer, that "the land nigh
be delivered from the Pope, the devil, and from
furriners in general" 10 which some sait
amen, some bravo, and few encore. Mar
with big ears then stated that the business TO
that night was to decide upon candidate TO
Congress; said "they had nine hundred mem
berS, and they were nine hundred and twent,
, seven candidates. Didn't know how it was
diLn't it; but one Thing he knowed
he wern't going to give up his claim, wished
l lie might be tetotally eXfuncticated if he did,
Several with smaller ears then said, "then
was exactly their sentiments" but thought
, little delay wouldn't hurt; better count nose
! first.
Meeting then broke up; went home and sen
; to an apothecary for Jew David'S Hebrew pIaS
: ter; couldn't set down for three days; effect
o of paddle.
Damphool called to see me; talked politics
told him should vote for Stevens. He said
y shouldn't; had sworn not to-; told him l.
quit; said if did I'd lose my custom; X N
u wouldn't trade with me; called me "trai'o
perjurer," and all that. Don't know what t
II do; reckon l'll have 10 stick to 'em.