Volcano weekly ledger., 1855-11-17
Mike Fink and the Bull


at him. The bull was vicious and had come
near killing two or three persons, consequent
ly Mike felt little "iubus" He didn't like
to call for help for he was naked, and the
nearest place from whence assistance could
arrive was the Westinghouse which was at
that time filed with worshippers, among
whom was the gal Mike was paying his de-
yours to-" So he lodged the bull as the an
imal came at him, and managed to catch him
by the tail. He was dragged round till near
ly dead, and when he thought he could hold
on no longer, he made up his mind to ''holler"
And now we will let him tell his own story
So, looking at the matter in all its bear
ings, | come to the conclusion that I'd better
let some one know whar | was. So | gin a
yell louder than a locomotive whistle, and it
warn't long before | seed the deacon's two
dogs comm down like as if they war see
ing which could get thar fust knowd who
they war arter ; they'd jne lhe bull against
me | was sartin, for they war orful wen0mous
and had a spite agin me- So, says l. old
brindle, as ridn is as cheap as walkin' on this
route, if you've no objections I'll just take
deck passage on that ar back O yourn So
| wasn't very long getting astride of him.
thar warnt nothin' human in that ar mir,
the sile flew so orfuly as the critter and |
rolled round the field; one dog on one side
and one on the other, tryin' to clynch my
feet. prayed and cusscd and cussed and
prayed until couldn't tell which | did at
last, and neither warn't of no use, they were
so orfully mixed up
Well, | reckon | rid about half an hour
this way, when brindle thought it were time
to stop to take in supply of wind and cool
off little. So when he got round to a tree
that stood thar he naturally halted. So, sez
|, old boy, yonll lose one passenger sartin.
So | jist clum up branch, kalkelatin' to
roost thar till | starved afore I'd be rid
round that ar way any longer war ma
king tracks for the top of the tree when
heard suthin' mailman orful buzzin' overhead
kinder looked up, and if thar warn't-
WELL thar's no use swearin'-but it war
the biggest hornets nest ever bilt You'll
gin in now, | reckon, Mike, cause thars
no help for you But an idea struck me
then that | stood heap better chance a
ridin' the bull than whar | was. Sez |, old
feller, if you'll hold on, I'll ride to the next
station any how, let that be whar it will
So just dropped aboard him agin, and
looked aloft to see what I'd gained by chang
in quarters, and gentlemen, I'm liar if
there wam't nigh half a bushel of the sting
|, in yarmints ready to pitch into me when the
word go" was gin Well, / reckon they
Got it, for all hands" started for our com
pany Some on em hit the dog, about a
quart hit me, and the rest charged on brin-
die.
, This time the dogs led off fust, dead bent
for the old deacon's, and as soon as old brin-
die and | could get under way We followed !;
and as | was only deck passenger, and had
nothin' to do with steerin' the craft | swarc,
if | had, we shouldn't have run the channel
/; any how But, as | said before, the dogs
took thelead, brinde and | next, and the
hornets drekly arter-the dogs yellin', brin-
die bellerin', and the hornets buzzin' and
stngin'.
) We'll, we had got about two hundred yards
from the house, and the deacon heard MS
come out | seen him hold up his hand and
turn white. reckoned he was prayn the
for he didn't expect to be called for so soon;
, and it warn't long, neither, aiore the whole
congregaton-men women and children
cum ont, and then all hands went to yellin'
None of em had the fust notion that brindle
and belonged to this world | just turned
my head and passed the hull congregation
3 see the run would be up soon, for brindle
coud't turn an inch from fence, and | went
ashore over the ole critters head, landing on
'other side, and lay there stunned
1t warn't long afore some Of 'em as was
not scared cum ruauin' to see whar | was,
for all hands kalkelated that the bull and /
belonged together But when brindle walk
ed off by himself they seed how it war, and
one of EN- said, "Mike Fnck has got the
wust of scrummage once in his life y
/ Gentlemen, from that day / dropped the
courtin' biziness, and never spoke to gal
since; and when my hunt is up ON this yearth
! there won't be any more FinkS, and its all
: OWN to Deacon Smiths Bull.
MADE Harry Yesterday, we met young
lady, who had just called on an elderly Wild
ow, who informed her that she was very hap
py, for an unexpected arrival of small sum
of money from her son, had enabled her to
render a still poorer widow than herself hap
by. She inquired how much she had receiv-
ed and was told five dollars. She then ask
ed how much she had bestowed upon her
poorer neighbor; the reply was, two dollars
; with which she had gone forth, with tears in
her eyes, to purchase few comforts for a
daughter who was dying of consumption
What luxury and how cheaply bought
But all this TO the miser is unintelligibe. -
Like the relish of olir>s, its requirement
would render a course of indoctrination ne
cessary, for which the mser has neither time
pflfn ion l,aL n.