Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1855-11-14
Eating Oysters.

| 1t was only few evenings ago, that hap
psnsd 10 be sitting at a side table in RS eating
saloon, in This place, indulglng in few fried
before going to bed. The oysters were particu
lary fine, and should have engrossed all my at
tenion; but visions of doctors and dyspepsl;
,could intrude themselves upon me.
| The opening of the dsor disturbed my not very
pleasant reveries, and when | raised my head. my
eyes fell upon a rather strange looking specimen
OF humanity. He evidently belonged to thai
class of persons called Yankees-not. a genuine
Yankee, such as come from Vermont State, and
are notorious for their wooden nutmeg propensl,
ties; not that kind Here we apply the term
yankee to hose individuals who coms down the
river semi annually with lumber,
Well, as soon as he entered, he walked, OF
rather ounged, up to the counter, behind which
r. was standing, and after watching his motions
for a moment or two, broke out with
Il say, captain, they look plump; s'pose you
open us few ra,r.'
A plate was put before htm, and R. commeuc-
ed serving them out pretty rapidly, as thought,
but not fast enough for the impatient river man.
The oysters hardly touched the plate before the
Yankee would hook it up with his fork, and gulp
il down at one swallow, and then he would -four
ish his fork befnre r ,'s face, aud cry
Hurry up the cakes! Wake up, old man =
&C., until r., whe had always prided himself on
his dexterity in uncasing the sea toads,' became
quite excited. At last, in reply to some cutting
Joke of the Yankee, R. said, in no very gentle
tone
Look here, friend, you seem to pride yourself
on being fast eater Now I'll bet you S20 |
can open oysters faster than you can pick up and
swallow them, and not half try
81 don't like TO be blufed off in that way, stran-
GER said the Yankee but you are lseth!e a.
head of my pile. S'pose you make it SlO, and
swan if | don't take you, ard give yov five Tor a
starter.'
This was agreed to, and both parties pulled out
their money, and deposited it in my hands.
After all was fixed, r. deliberately opened the
five he was to start with, and then rolling his
sleeves up to his elbows, called out to the YAM
kee, who was standing, fork in hand, and anx-
iously awaiting the commencement
'Now for it,
The words had hardly left his mouth before he
had added another to the plate, and then sec
ond, and third, following each other In quick
succession.
The Yankee was not idle all this time, but had
Oc6H SIUWlHS llcuI away ut io'o '""s "S-'
ed soon to empty the plate before him. X. was
beginning to look blank. and was just thinking
that he was going 10 give up and acknowledge
the corn,' when, suddenly, by dexterous twlIch,
he threw one out on the bar counter
Yankee stopped moment to cry FOUL, bnt
seeing that one had been gained on him by his
hesitation, swallowed it, dust and all. The next
went clear over the counter on the floor, and the
next, ,and the next.
The Yankee evidently began to see the game,
for instead of losing time expostulatlng, he weat
scrambling over the floor alter the oysters, which
now flew 10 all curners of the room, only waiting
to give them wipe on the sleeve of his coat be-
fore engulphing them.
Thus we were kept in doubt which would beat.
until R. capped the climax by making one alight
accidentally, of course-rigM in the spit bor.
The astonished man gazed for a moment at the
oyster, as it lay, halfilnbedded IN the dirty saw
dust, and then dropping his fork, made straight
coat tail out of a side door.
AS the door closed upon him, all hands joined
in hearty laugh at the expense of the vanquish-
ed hero, in which RS voice was most conSplcu-
Gus but woful change came over his counte-
nance as he examined the stakes which just
handed him. You may Judge how the laugh
turned, when he exclaimed, in voice moi unlike
the rumbling of distaut thunder
Counterfeit, sure's your born.'