Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-08-04
The borrowed CaIC.


his experience in cOurting:
"The only objection ever made to me
in this ere country, as 4 legislator, was
made bv the wlmmin, cause | war bach
ci0r, and never told you aIo'c why re-
maiued in i state Of number one. No tel
Ter stays single premedila,ed,and,ln in course
a hansum lclIer like me, who all the gals
declar to be as entcin' as ajay-blrd, WASH I
goin' to stay alone if he could help It. !
did see a creatur once named SoIy Mason,
up the Cumberland, nigh unto Nashville,
Tennessee, that took an orful hankcrn
arter. and | sot into lookm' anxious arer
matrimony, an Gin TO 90 reglar TO meet
in, and tuck tn dressin' tremengcous hnl-
fled, Jest tn see if | could win her good
opinion. She did re, To look at me kind
O shy, Jest as boss does at sumthin he's
scared at, when, ar.er champin al dis
tance for a while, | sidLed up to her and
/ blurted out few words about the sarmn;
she says YES but cuSs me if | know
whether that wur the right answer or not,
and I'm thnkin she didn't know nuther.
Well, we larled and talked lee!le all the
way long TO her daddy's, and thar give
her the best bend had in me, and raised
my bran new hat as peert and perIlie as \
minister, lookin' all the time so enucIn
that set the gal trembln'. Her old dad
dy had powerful numerous Iotol healthy
inlggers, and lived right jiniu my place,
while on the other side lived Jake SIM.
sons, a sneakin', cute varmint, who war
wusSer than a miser for sIingIncss, and no
sooner did this cusscd sarpint see ne
slidin' up to Sofy, than he went TO slick
in up, too, and sot himself to work TO cut
me out. That al wur n struggle ekIl to
the battle of Orleans. Furst sum ne"
| fix ND O. Jakc's would take her eye, and
then I'd sport sumlhin that wonId outshme
/ him, until at last Jake gin in tryn' 10 out
dress me, and sot thinkin' of sumthin else.
| Our farms were Jest the same number OF
acres, and we both owned three nlggers
apiece. Jake knew that Sofy and her dad
kept sharp look out for the main chance
so he thort he'd clear me out by buyn'
another niger; but loIIered suit, and
bought one the day after he go; his, so ne
had no advantage thar; he then got COW,
and so aid |, and jest about then both OF
our purses gin out. This put Jake to his
wits eend, and | war wunderin' what
in the yearlh he would try next. We
stood so, hip and thigh, for a bout two
weeks, both on us talkn sweet TO Soiy,
whenever we could get her alone. |
thorl seed that Jake, the sneakin' cuss,
wur gitin mile ahead o me cause his
longe was so 'lIey; however, | didn't let
on, but kept top eye on him. One Sun
day mornln | wur IillIe late TO mcetln',
and when got thar the lusl lhing ! seed
var Jake sittln close bang up agin SoIy
m he same pew with her daddy. billed
awhile with wrath, and then turned sour.
couidlasle myself. Thar they war,sing-
in hims out'n the same book. Jehemny,
lelIcrs, | war SO enormous mad that the
new silk handkerchief round my neck lost
lis color. Artcr meclin' war out, they
walked linked arms, smilln' an Iookln
as pleased as a young couple at their first
christnin' and Soly turned her cold shonI-
der 10 me so orful that ! wlIted down an
Gin right up slraight,-Jake had her; thar
war no dsputin' it. headed ii towards
home, with my hands so fur in my lrous-
crs pocket as | could put 'cm, swearln
all the way that she wur the last one lbaI
would ever git a chance 10 riIe up my
feelns. Passin' by Jake's plantation, ]
looked over the fence, and thar stood an
explanation, of the matter, right iacln the
road, whar every one PasSIn' could see II
Ills cOnsarncd cow wda tied to 4 stake
in the garden, with most PromIsn' cdy
alongside Of hfr.
The calf Just soured my mi!k,and made
Sofy think that GtIlcr who WIS always
gettin' ahead like Jake, wur night smart
chance for a lively husband. I shout OF
laughter here drowned Sugar voice. ~
soon as silence was restored, he added ~
a solemn voice, with one eye shut and his
forefnger pointed at bis auditory What.
was a cussed sight wusser than ms gel
tin Sofy, was the fact that ac borTo~eI .
the cnf the night alore Of Dick Harley !
After the varmint got Sofy hllchcd, he F..
told tie Joke all over the settlement, and
the bows never seed ne afterwards that
ihev didn't t-a-h at me for Ieun' a cali
cut me out Of a gals affection. I'd shot.
Jake, but thort u "ur free county,
the gal had a righ! ~ chcose, without be-
n made a wlddoer; 20 jest sold oul and
travelled. I've always Ihou since then.
boys, wim.uH WIZ good deaf like lex,
er-ef YOU love 'em too hatd, they're
sure 10 throw yon some way
4 weaA.mindrL lady says i anything
viii make wuml~ swPar, i : striking
her foot against lie rocacr of rocking