Plymouth advertiser. [volume] (Plymouth, Ohio) 1853-1988, 1855-08-18


keep that which have committed unto
him against that day
Ride on a Cow.
During the Revolutionary War when
corps of the American Army were en-
campcd near the borough oi Elizabeth
town, in New Jersey-an officer who was
rather more a devotee Of Venus than OF
Mars, paid his addresses to lady Of dis
tinction, whom he was in the habit Of Wis
iting nightly, in the cultivation of those
kindly feelings which love so cordially in
spires. On a discovery of the cause of
/ the repeated absence Of the officer, and Of
the place where his interview with his
dulcinea were had, some waggish friends
resolved to play off handsome trick at
his expense, which should deter him from
his amorous visits. The officer, it ap-
pears, rode very small horse of the pony
kind, which he always left united, with
the bride reins over his neck, near the
door, in order to mount and ride off with
out delay, when the business of counting
and kissing was over; and the horse re-
manned until backed by the owner, with
out attempting to change his position.
Cn a certain very dark night, when the
officer had, as usual, gone to pay his de-
voirs to the object of his affections, and
was enjoying the approving smiles of the
lovely fair-one, his waggish companions
went privately to the door of the house
where the officer was, took the bride and
; saddle from the horse, which they sent
, quietly away, placed the former on the
, tail, and the latter on the back of q very
ruminatire old COW, with the crupper
over the horns, who stood peacefully
; chewing her cud, near the spot. Imme-
: diatcly thereafter, they retired some dis
tance from the house, and separating,
raised the loud alarm that the enemy had
: landed, and were marching in full force
0 into the village. On hearing the voice Of
1 alarm, the people ran ont greatly excited
: and CONSERVATION entering every dwelling
= found its unwelcome way speedily into the
r household temple where our official hero
= was worshiping. Taking counsel from
/, his fears. and snatching hasty kiss he
f started from the lady's chamber. and rush
|. ing rapidly down stairs, shot out Of doors
i with the velocity Of musket ball, an(
# owing to the darkness, not seeing the in
= teresting change in the conformation o
= his nag, mounted hastily upon the saddle
e with his back towards the head Of tn
d COW, and plunging his sharp spurs deepl.
r, into her side, caused her to bawl out witt
= excessive pain, and she darted off in gal
liant style, and in her best gallop made to
,, wards the camp. The officer still plyin;
n his trusty spurs and whip to the skin ant
l. bones of the suffering old animal. an
l. with all his wine and love on board-fnd
Is ing himself hurried rapidly backwards
desrte all his efforts to advance an
rs hearing The repeated Rawlings of the tor
" tured and frightened beast, he imagine
er that he was carried off by magic, an
l. roared out most Justify that the old Mic
I'd had got him-was carried in this state {
e. perturbation into the very alignment {
e. the camp. The courageous sentine
of hearing the noise, and imagining NJ doub
10 that Hannibal and his oxen were comm,
is discharged their pieces and hed--tf
y. drum beat to arms the officers left the
quarters and cried turn out turn out
ID with all the strength Of their lungs. III
he soldiers started from their sleep as if
en- ghost had crossed their dreams-and Il
he whole body running, half naked togethc
re- formed as quickly as possible, in galla'
I dishabille, prepared to repel the terrib
n invader When 10 ! the ludicrous sigl
er soon presented itself to their eyes, Of Il
is. gallant officer, mounted on an old COY
X with his face towards her tail, and this a.
M, pcnlage sticking straight out behind h
el- tongue hanging out-her sides CORY vii
it the grievous digging of the spurs, ar
ell himself, owing to his excessive fear, a
ny most deprived of reason, and hall petl
nd fled with horror. A loud and gcner
NV roar of laughter broke from the assen
ed bled band, at the rider and the steed-tl
whole corps gave him three hearty cheer
of, as he boltel into the camp, and he W
If seized and carried to his quarters in Il
an umph, there to dream of loves metamo
Mt, phoses, backward rides, sternway advan
las es, alarms Of invasion, and thereby
in garnish his mind with the materials {
OF writing splendid treatise on Cow Ri
DIV ing.