Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1855-05-17
For the Eaton Democrat.
Leaves from an Anohorite's Portfolio,
'HERMITAGE," March ~.
All tho worlds n Stage,

LEAF-NUMBER ONE
'H~EaMTAGE,' March 10.
All the worlds a Stage,
And all the men and women truly players 81,
as yoa like IL
Travelling through the Mississippi valley, stop
ped at Lebanon. dusty in the extreme lace very
black, from Locomotive SCOT, hands greasy, az
mosphcre like carbonic smoke in q Juhk-bettlt
cOrked, intellectual faculties developed IN O
cloud of miasmatic eflvuia-brushed NJ. a little,
tried to get on a pair of No, l2's but couldn't
tried 1875 aud succeeded, walked out TO view
the city proper. Saw a small gruHtGr unccremo'
niOusly roofing near the door OF a fashionable
residence, carried in my hand a small walking
appendagc to a gentleunn's wardrobe. thought
to use it on the beast-but didn't, Met q young
gent with gutta- percla unmentionables on, very
light, he bowed TO a passing Minerva, straps
broke, causing q reccdence from the extremities
to the centre, the udicrOusness Of the scene re-
minded me fOrcibly Of the history OF creation
before fr-leayes were invented. Saw something
living on the ground near the scene OF disaster,
picked it up. found it to be a green berage sun
bennett, rather worse for the wear, thought we Il
return for supper, arrived at Hotel, lounged care
lessly in an armchair, picked up the Register,
and enjoyed an unexpected treat IN hlefoglylni-
cal literature. Supper over, went to the POST
office, came to the conclusion that q "hnoW
Nothing society would flourish in the vic'nity'
Stepped into n fashionable saloon, got two glass
cS Of Lager Beer for five cents, witnessed q Spe-
cimcn Of german gymaGSticS-ior nothing; he-
turning came to the conclusion, there had been Il
public vendue of Old Bachelors, as we saw forty
Old Maids, some younger some older,
Each Juggling q Bachelor home on her shoulder
A little further on saw 1.-The ELEPHANT" ell
body, and no tail at-all-a-mOSt," got SkeCred,
run oil, fell over a pot Of kT0ut in the neighbor-
hnnl nf tln Dnet-nnrrn gppr nod nv CiIn9 started
up, saw a Hcbe, met q grey headed old gentle
man, asked him if her eyes were not made OF In
dian Ink, and her lips Of rose leaves. got an an
swc in the affirmative, thought | saw mOlusSes
III her cheeks, felt Q twitching under my lett vest
pocket, like the safety valve Of an atmospheric
Engine. Heard somebody singing 18Th starry
Hours so Lone felt like a petriiied Apollo. look
ed up at the stars, thought them queer looking
candles. that burned so long without shutting,
wondered if the world revolyed on an a~Xletree,
and what it was made of, whether it was white
oak Or hickory. Attended the Incorporation
Mceting," would advise the city Fathers to turn
their attention to the study Of Gcopanies, was
struck with the olOQuepce ofan NJ. d., from tone
OF his closing remarks, cameto the conclusion he
must be 4 liberal aud high-minded gentleman,
thought it time 10 retire, arrived at our room,
ordered fire and lights, lit my pipe. and could
trace in the curling smoke the slyph-like form OF
my Iebc. her head was like unto a purcupine,
her body like a dutch sign at a saint Louis
Drinking House. and her foot, oh, exquisite,
like an anvil, thought he was nm angel but
couldn't see the wings. tried to catch her in my
arms. but shc-yamousod-fcli asleep under the
excitement, dreamed | was SUSPENDED by tho
heels in a pork-hOusc. and she tempting nc with
n broi'ed tcnGcr-loin. felt very comfortable jul
at that time. started, woke W, heard a noise
near my window. intended for suu-ri sc. got up
tsIul tnCpd II - hoard an imitation of ''Jim