Western Reserve chronicle. [volume] (Warren, Ohio) 1855-1921, 1855-06-06
W. R. CHEEsE-A COLLECTOR SOLD.


is no more useful class of community in
existence than collectors. They regu-
late trade and traffic, and establish an
equilibrium in innumerable legers, eth
er by "cash," or ''pro6t and loss" that
makes or breaks the reputation of humid
reds who venture into the tribulations,
troubles and yicissitudes of active life
Yet the generality of collectors are most
unwelcome visitors at any time, especial
ly when there is sc stringency in the
money Market" or a collapsed porte
moHnaie slowed away in the breeches
pocket of miserable debtor, while an
elongated bill is unceremoniously thrust
before his optics. We do not, however,
intend turning essayist on the delicate
subject of collecting.
We have friend-Ben we call him
for the sake of brevity. He is one of
those good natured, easy, afable collect
ors, who, when he presents bill, does
it with an unctious suavity that makes it
pleasure to one possessed of a plethor-
ic wallet, to pay, or sends thrill of re-
morse of conscience to another who finds
he can't discover "nary red," and,
therefore, compelled to exhibit his la
bilities as exceeding his assets FIVE hund-
red per cent Ben has recently under
taken a portion of the heavy contract of
collecting delinquent taxes, for the bene-
fit of Hamilton County, and the Treasu-
rer in particular This branch of busi.
ness is peculiar in its nature, and requires
those of Herculean force, vim and vine.
gar, to succeed. The various collectors
have their accounts and bills arranged in
alphabetical order, each one taking so
many letters of the alphabet, with the
list of the corresponding names of the
delinquents. 1t fell to the lot of our
friend Ben to have all the "C's" come
under his special jurisdiction. The list
of 90 C's" delinquents are rather exten'
sive, and it required, on the part of Ben,
unusual tact and ingenuity to post him.
self Familiarity with the names, places of
business, and residences of his multifa
rious creditors, scattered throughout
the corporate limits of the city. BY
night he would scrutinize closely the Di-
rectory and by day examine with mi
nuteness the signs, dOor-plates, and at
the same time, making comparisons with
his bills.
During his travels yesterday, through
one of our principal business thorough
fares, his attention was attracted to gilt
lettered sign over store door, with "W.
R. Cheese" standing out in bold relief
on it. Ben halted, and exclaimed to a
friend who accompanied him, ''I've got
bill against that fellow, [ think, " and
forthwith he stalked into the establish
ment. He drew from his pocket huge
package of bills, and as the proprietor
thinking him a customer) advanced
toward him, Ben, without looking up,
and fumbling over his bills, remarked,
/ SIS Mr.. Cheese in ?''
"Cheese," said the stOre-keeper
s'Who's Mr.. Cheese 90
"Why, W. R. Cheese, the man who
keeps this store" replied Ben. "His
name is on the door there
Nv. R. Cheese be id" answered
the man. "That means Western Reserve
Cheese"
Ben caved in. Without uttering a
word, he slowly replaced his bills, and
gracefullyietired. On reaching hiscOm-
panion at the door. he gravely remark
ed j: ''Pll 'C sharper next time. GIN.
Enquirer.