The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1855-07-25

tally of this young lady the moment I stril
up the Last Rose of Summer"
Istruck up, but the window remained close
The boys smiled.
''Oh!'' said I, stthat's nothing; it would n
be in good taste to open the window on tt
first air"
1 next struck up on "Old Robin GRAY,
Still the window remained closed. The bo7
snickered, and felt somewhat fiat.
''Once more boys said I, land she mus
GOMEZ
struck up again-"My love is like the red
red rose.' Still there was no demonstration
"Boys,' said [, "she's humbug. Let u
sing Home sweet Home and if that dom
bring her, we will give her up
We struck up, and as we finished the las
line the window was raised
THAT'S the ticket, boys" said I, II knew
We could fetch her."
4 But instead of the beautiful young lady il
turned out to be the old quaker, in his night
cap and dressing gown.
'SFriend," said he, "thee was singing of thy
sweet homeland if recoIlect right, thee said
there is no place like home,-why don't thee
60 to thy home? Thee is not wanted here
thee or any of thy party. Farewell!''
A gentleman played off a rich Joke on his
better half the other day. Being something
of an epicure, he took it into his head that he
should like to have first rate dinner. So he
addressed her note politely informing her
that "a gentleman of her acquaintance-an old
and true friend, would dine with her that day.''
AS soon as she received it all hands went to
work to get every thing in order. Precisely at
II O'Clock she was prepared to receive her
guest. The house was as clean as new pin;
sumptuous dinner was on the table, and she
was arrayed in her best attire A very gentle
knock was heard and she started with palp
tating heart to the door. She thought it must
be an old friend-perhaps brother from the
place whence they once moved. On opening
the door she saw her husband with smilinS
countenance.
"Why, my DEAR" says she, in an anxious
tone, .'where is the gentleman of whom you
spoke in your note?''
why" replied her husband, com placently,
'here he isl
'You said gentleman of my acquaintance,
IN old and true friend, would dine with US TO- {
lay
"Well," said he, good humoredly, "am l y
lot a gentleman of your acquaintance, an old !
nd true friend?'' d
"oh?' she cried, distressingly, sis there no. -
ody but you?" tp
W. al
"Well, declare this is too bad" said his
lie, IN an angry tone.
The husband laughed immoderately-his o. o.
etter-half said she felt like giving him real @
'ngue- lashing-but finally they sat down to-
ether, and for once he had good dinner with W
ut having company. til
A gentleman on a visit to Washington one -
ay, very coolly opened the door of the senate an
1amber, and was about to pass in, when the h
oor-keeper asked
care you privileged member?' be
"What do you mean by that" asked the art arr
ranger. pc
The reply was pa
"a governor, an ex-member of congress, or
foreign Minister
The stranger replied that he was minister sta SIT;
IRON what court OF country, if you please"
ked the official -
Very gravely pointing up he said,
"From heaven, si-."
10 this the door-keeper waggishly remark r.
with bow +
"Thls government at present holds no inter- ton
urse with that foreign power''
a clergyman OF country village desired snd
clerk to give notice that there would be no TAI
vice IN the afternoon, as he was going "to dri r
lcate for another clergyman" The Clerk. awl
soon as the sermon was ended, rose I'D with use
due solemnlty, and called out Il am desired wh'
give notice that there will be no seryice this con
ernoon, as Mr. Lis going fishing with t;on
other clergyman" Mr. LOT course cor CON-
ted the awkward yet amusing blunder. kin,
The Say brook Conn Mirror makes griey- auie
complaints of the postmaster at that Dlace lacu
uses him OF carelessness, unpoteness want il is
accommodation, and other uaam;ab1ities the
winds up by saying that he seems to be duce
PRESSED with the idea that he owns the whole fogs
IL '0nAi'h leIce oy the tain
the ]
, n'altieu lady, who was very fond of her high
oanu' Notwithstanding his extreme ugli- e G;
5 OF person, once said to very witty &C. the
"That do you think! my husband n as.
gone and laid out fifty dollars for LARGE 'as Jo
nkey, on purpose to please me-" s.T6e Jam
il'tle man., cried the other; "well, it is CESS.
like him!'' '' ~ 10 G. H
lady making inquiries of boy about his E Rsis
En- an incorporate man, who had been sick ton,
some tlme, asked whether he had regain an,
lis appetite: "No, ma am," says the bow or
exactly: his annette l. vos- H. o1y' berts
Kettle is as good as ever" o ~snn
conversation is the great book of the world 3.
caches the use of all the other books, and Adol
ming is almost useless without r. ond 1e.o. Rams
Its charms. Conversation brings natures OF ct Q,
1t INTO practice, and gives it a proper fin gene
- unsu
lom' you recollect old Dido, that Virgil ieets
k,o,n H. o'i-"hy! Don subje
INV vas Always iona OF duckS!'- cure
, what makes you think sop "Why, fly. II
he say 'tDido ct dux9,, To,, sloa - wick
There is man in our neighborhood, ''says ' M
whose ears are so long that etor,
SEES them in hot weather to fan himself Shire,
convenient. Wonder how thew would Jy4
ate IN rainy weather? Ger
G o not read books alone, but men. and he IA
ful to read myself Don't live IN hone R
your arms folded fortune smiles on those ll1
ron up their sleeves, and put their shout w pa.II
to the Wheel '''0N'' De- pei
'zness and debt are very near relatives: going
they do not go hand in hand. i is NOT goods