True American. [volume] (Steubenville [Ohio]) 1855-1861, 1855-10-31
AN EDITOR DREAMING ON WED
DING CAKE.

low-shut our eyes sweetIy as an infant,
blessed with an easy conscience.-soon
snored prodigiousIy. The god of dreams
gently touched US, and 10 in fancy we
were married Never was little editor
so happy 1t was my love- dearest,
sweetest ringing in our ears every mo-
ment. Oh that the dream had broken
off here. But no, some evil genius put
it into The head of our ducky to have
pudding for dinner, just to please her lord.
In a hungry dream we saldown to din
ner. Well the pudding moment arrived
and huge slice almos'enough to obscure
from sight the plate before US.
MY dear said we, fondly. did you
make this 2
Yes, love, amt it nice ?
'Glorious-Ihe best bread pudding l ever
tasted in my life
Plum pudding, ducky,' suggested my
wife.
0, no, dearest bread pudding, always
was fond of 'em.'
Call that bread pudding 2 exclaimed my
wife, while her lip curled slightly with
contempt.
Certainly, my dear-reckon I've had
enough at the Sherwood house 10 know
bread pudding my love, by all means
Husband, this is really too bad; plum
pudding is twice as hard 10 make as breat
pudding and more expensive, and is {
great deal better. say this isplum.pud.
ding, sir and my wile's brow flashed
with excitement,
MY love, my sweet, my dear love,
exclaimed we, soothingly, do not get an
cry, I'm sure it is very good if it is bread
pudding
you mean, low wrelch,' replied my
wife in higher tone, you know It's plum
pudding
Then, ma'am, it is so meanly put to-
gether and so badly burned, that the de-
vii himself wouldn't know it. tell you
madam, most distinctly and emphaticaIy
and | will not be conlradcied, that it is
bread pudding, and the meanest kind at
that
At is plum pudding shrieked my wife,
as she hurled glass of caret in my face
the glass itself tapping The claret from my
nose.'
Bread puddingl' grasped we, pluck to
the last, and grasping roasted chicken by
the left leg
Plum pudding!' rose above the din, as
| had distinct perception of feeling two
plates smash across my head.
Bread pudding ! we groaned in rage
as the chicken left our hand, and flying
with swift wing across The table, landed
in madam's bosom.
Plum pudding' resounded the war
cry from the enemy, as the gravy dish
took us where we has been depositng the
first part of our dinner, and plate Of beets
landed upon our white vest.
Bread pudding forever! shouted we in
defiance, lodging The soup tureen and fall
ling beneath its contents.
plum puddng!' yelled the amiable
spouse, as noticing our misfortune, she
determined to keep us down by piling
upon our head the dishes with no gentle
hand. Then in rapid succession follow
ed the wal cries, plum pudding! she
shrieked with every dish.
Bread pudding! in smothered tones
came up from the pile in reply. Then
it was plum pudding in rapid succession,
the last cry growing feebler, till just as !
can just distinctly recollect, it had grown
to whisper. Plum pudding! resoun,
ding like thunder, followed by tremen-
dous crash, as my wife leaped upon the
pile with her delicate feet, and commen-
ced jumping up and down--when, thank
Heaven, we awoke and thus saved our
life. We shall never dream on wedding
cake again-That's the moral.