Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1855-05-16
Formal InYitatiOMs.

Vivier, the celebrated aud witty artist, passed
recently some time at Paris, on his return from
his summer travels. He had hardly arrived
when he was invited to dine with Mons ",
the musical amateur and rich capitalist. After
the repast, the master and mistress OF the house
said to their agreeable guest, ''We hope that we
shall have you often to dine with us your plate
will always be ready"
"Always ?" said Yivier. ''that is in the fash
onable sense Of the word"
s'By no means We are not persons OF such
hollow politeneSs. You know how much we
love artists, and you in particular. Our home Is
yours. Come and dine with us whenever you
please. We should be glad if it were every
dayn
sin earnest ?"
"Cerlainly, we should be delighted"
"Ah, well; since you are so cordial, promise
you will do my best to be agreeable"
"Ye shall depend upon seeing YOU"
The next day, at six o'clock, Vivier presented
himself
You see," said he, ,E'that have taken your in
yitaton literally. have come TO dine"
"Ah it is very kind of you!-it is very char
ming" said his host. to whom his arrival ap-
peared very piguant and quite original.
The dinner was very gay, and the artist, on
taking leave. received many compliments.
The next day, as they were about 10 SIT down
to the table Vivier again appeared.
"Here am, exact, punctual and faithful tony
promise. But it is singular" he continued, hX-
ing penetrating and quizzical look upon the ia
ces of his hosts-"it is singular!-you appear
surprised-did you not expect me ?'
ooh! certainly, you give US much pleasure"
the Amphtryon and his wife replied with u tcrc-
ed smile.
$50 much the better"
Vivier sat down, was in his happiest vein,
played the agreeable TO all the family, and seem
ed quite unconscious that he had all the burthen
Of the entertaining, and that except few mono
syllabes, the conversation was reduced to a mere
monologue.
On the fourth day, at 6 o'clock precisely, the
obstinate guest once more presented hlmself.-
This time codness aud constraint were very per-
ceptibe and Fivier spoke of
The mistress of the house replied stffly: "lt
is only because we feared you would not fare well,
we have so poor dinner to-day"
81 thought you expected me, but it is OF no
consequence. am not difficult. | wish only
the pleasure of your society,""
He seated himself with perfect composure, ate
heartily then turning 10 Madame with compli-
mentary air, he said:
..What could you mean? This dinner is quite
as good as the others. Excellent fare upon my
word | should desire nothing better"
The next day-it was the fifth-Viver arrv-
ed as usual. The porter met him at the door
" Monsieur X--is not at home. lie dimes down
town to-day"
"Ah! very we'll But forgot my great coat
Yesterday. must ask the servant for it," and
| = H., al eI,olI nd ba ctair
he knocked The door was opened-unsuspect-
ed apparition.
"Your porter is a simpleton," said Vivier, gal
lly. "He pretended that you had gone out. |
knew that he was mistaken But what long ia
ces! What sombre and melancholy air Has
anything happened Any accident, any misior-
tune? Tell Inc. that | may offer my sympa-
thies"
All dinner time, the witty artist continued and
redoubled his entreaties that the supposed mis&r-
tune might be confided to him. lie complained
of their reserve, and indulged himself in all sorts
of conjectureS and questions.
"Have you lost money in speculatlons! missed
al inheritance? heard bad music? received VS.
liz from troublesome bore2 Have you been
wounded in your affections in your fortune? in
your ambition
Then at the desert, bursting into fit oflaugh-
ter:
.sI know what is the matter, and what trou-
bes you 1t is your Invitation, so cordially made,
and 50 literally accepted. thought that would
make the trial, suspecting that you would not en-
dure me long. To day you shut the door against
me, and tomorrow, if | should return, you would
throw me out of the window. But you will not
catch me here. wish you good evening"
IYGEyIous.-Ouy landlords are getting mighty
particular about their tenants, as we'll as their
rents If body has half dozen children, and
of course more need of house than if he had none
at all, he is very coolly told he cannot have the
premises.
''Have you children MADAME" inquired one OF
these sharpers, of lady in modest black who was
looking at one of his houses just finished and III
perfect order.
YES" said the gentle mother, 81 have seven,
sill, but tkey are al IN tie church gard" A sigh
and the dew of tear gave impressiveness to the
painful remark, and without farther parley the
bargain was closed Her little flock were wait
inc for her in the church yardearound the corner,
and were delighted to hear that she had found a
SNUG house so speedily. The landlord says he
shall never trust woman ia black after this.
|
INTENSE HEArIN -Messrs. Joseph
StllinC s. Co., of Adelaide. South Australia, in
their circular for the overland mail, ay:-"Durins
the last seven days the continuance Of hot weather
has been unparalleled since the establishment o
the coloay; ia this period, the thermometer has
constantly ranged night and dag, in the shade
from so to l20 degrees, according TO situation
and from $50 TO $50 degrees in the sun. Many
cases of sunstroke have occurred in the neghbor
hood, death being the result in some instances
Apples are also being exhibited as having been
roasted on the trees from the fierce rays of the
sun as perfectly as Though they had been In a
furnace"
TAXING A Landlord AT HIS WoRD.-We
have heard of cool things, but never anything
cooler than the following The landlord OF a ho-
iel at Whitehall called q boarder to him one day
and said Look o. here / want you to pay your
board bill, and YOU must. I've asked you for ii
often enough and tell you now, that you don't
leave my house ill you pay it," Good" said
his lodger; '.ust put that IN writing makea reg
ular agreement of i; ; Pl stay with you as long as
live! e!"-Knickerbsck -uagasine.
Novel BUT Coon REASON FOE DECLINING A
CHALLENGE.--Th New York Times States that
on Tuesday flare up occurred in Brooklyn
which resulted in Col. Jack, a lawyer, chaleng-
ing proieSSlonal OrOtler, named ScnoORtnaker,
and that the latter declined accepting the invita-
tion, "unless The Colonel nould tatten himself up
sWficcientiyt TO be q mark to shoot al" Col. j
has not yet indicated his intention to accede to the
request.
PoNPEY's Plea Two darkles in conversa-
ton. -Sam-You'll get it for hooking dat tur-
key last night. MasSa knows it," Pompey-
l''I did mt hook it. Warn't de turkey massa's
Well Amt massa's? Well, | eat de tur.