Squatter sovereign., 1855-03-06
Milstellaneoas,
MARRYING A COUNT.
BY KATE SUTHERLAND.

"Is any body dead9"
"Yes. Somebody dies every Sec
ond.
$50 they say. But don't mean that.
What are you looking SO solemn
about?"
81 am not aware that I look so very
solemn"
"You do then as solemn as the grave"
"Then must be grave subject" The
young man affected to smile.
'You smile like deaths head, Abel
What is the matter?
Abel Lee took his interrogator by the
arm, and drew him aside. When they
were a little apart from the gay company,
he said in a low voice
"You told me that month ago.
'sShe is here to night"
$50 See"
Sand is as cold to me as an icicle."
"For very plain reason"
eyes too plain"
"Whiskers and moustaches are driving
all before them. The man is nothing now;
hair is every thing. Glover will carry off
the prize unless you can hit upon some
plan to win back the favor of Miss Ara
bella. You must come forward with high
er attractions than this rival can bring"
Lee drew his fingers involuntarily over
his soomth lip and chin, movement which
his friend observed and comprehended.
"Before the hair can grow, Arabella
will be won," he said.
"Do you think l would make a fool Of
myself?"
"Fool of YOURSELF! What do you mean
by that? You say you love Arabella Jones.
If you wish to win her, you must make
yourself attractive, yon have only to culti-
vate whiskers, mustaChes and an i'm
perial, and present a more Iuxuriant
crop than Glover. The whole matter is
very simple, and comprised in nutshell.
The only difficulty in the way is the loss of
time consequent upon the raising of this
hairy crop.
1t is plain, in fact, that you must take
shorter way; you must purchase what you
havn't time to grow. Hide yourself for
week or two and then make your appear
ance with enough hair upon your face to
conceal one-half or two-thirds of your fea-
lures, and your way to the heart Of Miss
Jones is direct
81 feel too serious on the subject to make
it matter Of jesting," said Lee, not by any
means relishing the levity of his friend.
''But, my dear sir" urged the friend,
81 propose is your only chance. Glover
will have it all his own way, if you do not
take some means to head him off: The
matter is plain enough. In the days of
chivalry knight would do almost any un-
reasonable thing-enter upon almost any
mad adventure-to secure the favor of his
lady love; and will you hesitate when moth
ing of more importance than the donning
of false whiskers and moustaches is con-
cerned2 You don't deserve to be thought
of by Miss JONES'
"Jest away, Marston, if it is so pleas
ant to you,' remarked Lee, with slightly
offended air.
"No, but my dear fellow, am in ear
nest 1 really wish to serve you. Still,
if the only plan at all likely to succeed is
SO repugnant to your feelings, you must
let the whole matter go. Depend upon it
there is no other chance for you with the
lady,"
'Then she must go. would not make
fool of myself for the Queen of Sheba.
A man who sacrifices his own self-respect
in order to secure the love of woman be-
comes unworthy of her love-"
"Well said, Abel Lee! That is the sem
timent of right mind, and proves to me
that Arabella Jones is unworthy of you.-
Let her 60 to.the whiskers, and do you
try to find some one who has soul enough
to love the man."
The young men separated, to mingle
with the company. Marston could not
help noticing Miss Arabella Jones more
particularly than before, and perceived she
was coldly polite to all the young men who
ventured to approach her, but warm and
smiling as June morning to an individ-
ual named Glover, who had been abroad,
and returned home rich In hairy honors, if
in nothing else. The manners of this
Glover distinguished him as much as his
appearance.
ssTo think that woman could be at
tracted by thing like thatr' he said to
himself, a little pettishly, as he saw the
alacrity with which Arabella seized the Of
fered arm Of Glover to accompany him to
the supper table.
Marston was fellow of good deal of
humor and relished practical joking rather
more than was consistent with the COM
fort of other people. We cannot commend
him for this trait of character. But it was
one of his faults, and all men have their
failings. 1t would have given him great
pleasure, could he have induced Abel Lee
to set up rivalry in the moustaches and
whisker line; but Able had too much good
sense for that, and Marston, be it said to
his credit, was rejoiced to find that he had.
Still the idea having once entered his head,
ne could not drive it away. He had a
most unconquerable desire to see some one
start an opposition to Glover and was half
tempted to do it himself, for the mere fun
of the thing. But this was rather more
troI,bie than he yz-ished IN taEe