Daily American organ. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1856, 1855-06-04
From the London Punch, May 10.
Punch on the British Army Officer

"f we are nali ashamed 10 auVort 70 the manBnaH
sarcasms Of the plsbeians who have the imperti
nence to suggeat that soldiers of the class which
produces such men as those honorable and gallant
members of Parliament who SO nobly chastsed the
libellous Layard are mere drawing-room- warriors,
and that their military zeal ia all aectation But
as the immortal Milton expresses 1t, Mark, now,
how plain tale shall put them down." The modes.
ty Tor which the soldier Of fashion is remarkable
would be offended, did we alude personally to the
honorable and gallant members who most promi.
nently figured upon the occasion in question.
But, as Herodotus remarks, noscitur sociis,
and we are sure that we shall risk of wound
ing the delicacy Of the Norths, Pees, Knoxes, and
other military ornaments of our Senate, If from tho
records Of the services of the class of whom they
illustrious types we extract few details in or
der to confute the ignorant malice ofther detract
ora. From amongst the number Of gallant officers
who have distinguished themselves by services
which notone oftheir plebeian and pothouse assail
ants would haye known how to render, we take some
names at random, for, light where we will, we find
courage, chivalry, and devotion. Captain Outlaw
happened to be the first whom we recall, and we
mention him before his superiors in rank to show
how base and mean is the accusation that merit Is
not appreciated by the aristocracy, and those Who
like ourselves, humby represent them.
Captain Outlaws services date as far back as the
Tamburinia affair, when that gallant officer went
into the opera pit without orders, (being on the
zee list occupied place in front OF the trenches,
rather benches, and kept up most damaging
fire of Yah-yahs against every foreigner who dared
to present himself, until physical exhaustion made
it necessary for him to retire and recruit himself
with pale ale. He then undauntedly returned to
the attack, and haying purchased pint of nuts
in the Haymarket, continued to throw shells
against the curtain Of the fortress until officer
of the A division, approaching his character, re-
moved him to station where his peculiar talents
were better placed. For this exploit Captain Cuff
faw received the order Of the Fine Of Forty Bob.
Another Of the gallant men of the same admira-
BILE class, Colonel Spooney, distinguished himself
during the arduous Jenny Lind campaign, when
he took some boxes at less sacrifice than any Of
fcer in her Msjesty's service, besides once, on a
wet opera night, mounting the box OF a carriage,
AMI cutting out and cutting in, after style which,
though ignorantly censured at the time by those
who are afraid Of any spirited course of action,
opened communication between the Dowager
Lady Slobgollion then besieged by lnkmen) and
her servants, including oysters and madeira, into
herself, at an earlier date than she had expected
For this he was rewarded with a clasp Of the hand
by her grateful ladyship
OF the services Of Colonel Boke Il Is needless
to speak. He was intrusted by friend with the
difficult duty of conveying note to an heiress who
sat IN the centre Of the stalls on crowded night,
and who was guarded by two vigant sentinels in
the form of aunts The adroit stratagem by which
he contrived TO effect this, (by making his way to
one Of the aunts stalls, claiming it as his own,
30 irchng his pockets for his ticket and creating
confusion, in the midst Of which he managed TO
stoop and squeeze up the note into the young la
dy's pocket handkerchief) is matter Of history at
HETEROGENEOUS. He occupied stall under the
late Duke Of Wellington, whose attention, when
In his box the Colonel more than once attracted,
but the Iron Dukes habitual reserve prevented
his taking any particular notice Of the young Of
fcer.
He was also engaged in several actions and in
one Of them, at the suit Of landlady, he lost all
his baggage, and two guns, double-barrels, but he
speedily recovered his loss by his skilful manage
ment Of canon, lat billiards. by which, and
bold stroke over bridge, he completely defeated
the enemy. Lastly, We have TO mention Captain
White Choker, officer Of true British mould, and
well known as a stormer, having stormed at his
servant every morning for thirty years, until that
mental declared he could no longer face such
storming party. When Mr. Hope, NJ p, could
not find his carriage one night, Captain Choker led
the forlorn hope to the very place where It was.
At the siege Of Badsjoz, at the Surrey Zoology
cal Gardens he lost the sight Of one eye, through
some dust getting intoit but from this he recoy-
cred rapidly, but only to lose the pocket handkcr-
chief with which he had wiped il out He was
never actually engaged with the French, but has
often fought cocks, which are the Gallo symbol,
and those who have observed the extreme fastid
BUSINESS with which he selects his dentrfces, II
stupid, would not again assert that he smelt
powder in anger. Such are the men who are ridi-
culed and despised by plcbeian press and public
for their exertions In putting down the Ninevah
nuisance
NKw STYLE OF BABY.-The police, a few days
siuce visited certain house in this city, under the
expectation of finding some liqnors " intended for
sale" Everything, however, appeared quiet and
home.lke. The "spirits," If about were invisi-