davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27
New Years Gifts,

It's frequently asked what may gen.
tleman most properly offer 10 4 lady as a
holiday gift, and what may lady receive
without being supposed TO encourage a
gentleman's addresses! A good authori-
ty on the subject gives the following
answer:
When a pleasant visiting acquaintance
only is 10 be acknowledged, the gift should
never be expensive, at least, apparently
so, Jewclry, except in the family or
where an engagement is acknowledged, is
out of taste, and many ladies would not
accept it. No article of dress, as a scarf,
shawl or lace, should be offered. New
books, particularly Of engravlngs; new
music; fine single engraving; a hot house
boquet; a fan, a fanciful box of Paris
gloves, if the lady has pretty hand, and
you can manage to learn her number; or
of bon b0ns, if she is not above sugar
plums; portfolio or writing stand, if she
dabbles in literature; and, what would be
still more acceptable 10 many a years
subscription 10 some literary journal are
still suitable.
We cannot too highly censure the
practice so many young girls have of
throwing out hints Or expectations of a
gift before their gentlemen visitors. Many
are thus made to feel obliged to purchase
and offer what they cannot afford, from
a feeling Of false shame. We know of
welI-bred women, on the contrary, who
make it rule never TO accept any other
than the least triAe from any gentlemen
out OF the family circle.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

MoDERATE DEsIREs.-A nice young
army ofIicer,no in CoDslantinople, writes
to his cousin in London, that the conclu-
ding line Of Payne's popular ballad,
"lhere's no place like home,' is decided
Iy more poelical than true. "COnstanIi-
nople, (he writes is the place. Here,
for the paltry sum Of R500 sterling year,
a man of moderate desires may 1--we like q
prince--commodious habilation--the best
of wine--the most glorious tobacco
three beautiful wives, and no going Ia
church." A soldiers paradise--Iruly.
Ii needs nothing but his bishops blessing
to render il perfect.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27
AGEN T S.
poetital.
THE HEART OF MAN.
BY FINLEY JOHNSON.


Tie heart Of man looks up TO God,
When wrapp'd in Sorrows nighg
When sad and lone it bends beneath
Times ever wasting blight;
And upward still i: ever looks,
When sunk in deep despair,
For well it knows that in that hour
1t needs a Fathers care,
The heart of man looks up 10 God,
When fierce the lightnings fash;
When on the wild and stormy deep
The wild waves madly dash,-
For well man knows that Gods right arm
Extendeth o'er the shore;
While in the thunier's voice he speaks,
Aud makes the whirlwind's roar.
The sorrowing heart looks up to Goo,
When all it loved is dead
When friends before the last of death
Have terror stricken fled
And when we follow to the tomb
The forms Of those we love,
The heart looks up with trustfulneSs
To him who fult2 above.
The heart Of man looks up on high,
When in His temple fair,
The joys of Heaven come down 10 him,
To chase away despair;
Wien all is bliss-o: when indeed
lie bends beneath the rod,
The heart, the sorrowing heart looks up,
And owns there is God.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27
Speech of Mr.. Zachariah spicer.

On me QueStluu y w HlCu Gil lSS lHe
greatest amount of happiness, the bach
elor or the married man.
Mr.. President and Gentlemen-I rise
TO advocate the cause of the married man.
And why should not! claim to know
something about the institution, | do.
Will any gentleman pretend to say | do
not! Let him accompany me home. Let
him confront him with my wife and sew
enteen children, and decide.
High as the Rocky Mountains tower
above the Mississippi Valley, does the
character of the married man tower above
that of bachelor. What is a bachelor?
What was Adam before he got acquainted
with Eve! What but q poor, shi(lless,
helpless, insignificant creature? No more
10 be compared with his after-self, than a
mIll-dam to the great roaring cataract of
Niagara. Applause.
Gentlemen, there was a time, blush
TO say it, when too was bachelor; and
a more miserable creature you would
hardly expect TO find. Every day | tolled
hard; at night came home to my COM
fortress garret-no carpet,Lo Gre, no moth
ing. Everything was in clatter, and in
the words of the poet,
Confusion was monarch Of all he surveyed"
Here lay pair OF pants, there dirty
pair Of boots, there play bill, and here
dirty pile of clothes. What wonder
that | took refuge at the gaming table and
bar-room. ifound it wvud never logon
tlemen, and in lucky moment | vowed
to reform. Scarcely had the promise
passed my. lips, when knock was heard
at the door, and in came Susan SimpEins
after my dirty clothes.
Mr.. Spicer,' says she, I've washed
Cor you six months, and havn't seen the
first red cent in the way of payment.
Now Id like to know what you are go
ing to do about il?'
i felt in my pocket-book. There was
nothing in it, and knew it we'll enough.
Miss SimPkins,' said !, sit is no use
Of deny ing it. havn't got the pewter,
and | wish for your sake had
FThere,' said she promptly, Il don't
wash another rag for you
eSlop,' said /. Susan, will do what
| can for you. Silver and gold have |
none; but if my heart and hand will do,
they are at your service
Are you in earnest said she, looking
a little suspicious.
Never more so,' says |.
he So n q
no prospect of getting my pay any other
way, guess I'll take you up at your Of
far
Enough said. We were married in a
week; and what's more, we haVn't repent
ed it. No more antics for me, gentlemen.
live in a good house, and have somebody
TO mend my clothes. When was poor
miserable bachelor, gentlemen, | used TO
be as thin as a weasel. Now | am plump
as porker.
In conclusion, gentlemen, if you want
TO be poor, ragged devil, without coat
to your back, or shoe 10 your foot; if
you wan, TO grow old before your time,
and as uncomIortabIy, generally, as a
hedgehog rolled up the wrong way |
advise YOU TO remain bachelor; but if you
want to live decenly and respectfully, get
married. I've got ten daughters, gentle
men, Cover powering applause, and you
may have your pick.
MIR. Spicer sal down amid long contin-
ued plaudils. The generous proposal
with which he concluded, secured him
five sons-in.law.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27
Hard of Hearinc--A Love story.


A Young Jonathan once coUr'ed The
daughter of an Old man that lived down
east, who rrote,sed To he deficient in hea-
ring. but lorsooth, was more cautious than
limited in hearing, as the sequel shows.
1t was stormy night in the ides OF
March, il | mistake not, when lightning,
and the loud peaIs of thunder answered
thunder, that Jonathan sat by lhe old
mans hreside, discussing with the oil
lady (his intended mother-n-law) on the
expediency of asking the old mans per-
mission 10 marry SAL Jonathan had re-
solved to pop it to the old man the next
day. The night passed, and by the dawn
of another day the old man was found in
his barn lot feeding. Jonathan then rose
from his bed early in the morning, sped
the old man feeding his pigs, and resolved
to ask him for Sal.
Scarce had a minute elapsed, after JON
athan made his resolution, ere he bid the
old man ''good morning" Now Jona-
lhan'S heart beat, now lie scratched his
head, and ever anon gave birth 10 PEN
sive yawn. Jonathan declared that he d
as lief take 80 stripes as TO ask the old
man; but said he, aloud to himself
however, here goes it, faint heart never
won a fair ga," and addressed the old
man thus
4 say, Old man, l want TO marry your
daughter
Old Man.-'You want to borrow my
halter, would loan it to YOU, jonathan,
bat my son has taken it and gone TO the
mill
Jonathan-(Putting his mouth close 10
the old mans ear, and speaking in dea-
Gening voice. I've goItive hundred pounds
of money =
Old Man.-S,epping back as if greatly
alarmed, and exclaimed in a voice OF sur
prise, you have got five hundred pounds
of honey What in Ihe mischief can
YOU do with so much honey, Jonathan.
Why its more than the waote neghbor-
hood has use for
Jonaihan-(Not yet the victim Of des-
pair, and putting his mouth to the old
mans ear, bawled out I've got gold
Old Nlan.-'So have jonathan, and it
is The worst cold ever Ii d in my life. ,
SO saying he sneezed wash up
BY this time the old lady came up, and
having observed Jonahans unfortunate
luck, she put her mouth 10 the old mans
ear, and screamed like wounded Yahoo.
Daddy, say, Daddy--you don't un-
dersland, he wants 10 marry your daugh.
tei.'
Old Man.--I told him our halter was
gone
Old Lady.-'Why Daddy, you don't
understand-he's got goId--he's rich ?
Old Man.--'IIe'sg got cold and the itch,
ell ! What is he doing here with the
Itch, eh = So saying, the old man aim
ed blow at Jonalhan's head with his
walking cane, bal happily for Jonathan,
he lodged it.
Nor did the rage Of the old man stop
at this, but with an angry counlenance he
made after Jonathan, who took TO his
heels; nor did Jouathan's luck stop here,
he had not got out of the barn yard, nor
far from the old man, who run him close
race, ere Jonathan stumped his toe, and
fell TO the ground, and before The old man
could take up he stumbled over iona
than and fell sprawling in mud hole.
Jonathan sprung to his heels, and with
the speed of John GiIpin cleared himself.
And poor Sal she died nun-never had
husband.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

A DISHONEST DoG.--The Fall River
Monitor relates the following dog story
showing that remarkable brules as well as
wonderful men sometimes apply their
superior talents to the worst of purposes ::
A family residing in the southern part
of the city, are the owners of large and
faithful watch dog. The little daughter
being very anxious TO possess set of
furs, the other day commenced teasing
her mother very earnestly to procure her
some. While doing so, the sagacious
dog stood near eyeing them very in
tenily, apparently understanding the
meaning of the conversation. Watching
an opportunity he left the house soon af-
ter. and made his way directly TO one of
orr fur storas. AMI seizing one Of these
articles which was displayed at the door
for sale. he made of with 1t. He direct
ed his course homeward, and being PuF-
sned the fur was taken from him just as
he reached the steps ofhis masle's resi-
/ dence.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

Uncle Josh SAYS the colder the wealth
er, the closer muslin de laiue hugs up to
cashmere and broadcloth. With the
thermometer at zero, calico's attachment:
to corduroy is only equealIed by the aiiec-
ton that is said 10 subsist between death
and deceased coIored gentleman. In
hot weather, calico runs away from you
like so much perspiralion.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

PAT's SPEEcH.-'0ch, jamie, did ye
niver hear Nv my great speech afOre the
Hibernian Society?
No Pat, how should for shuIe
was not on the ground
We'll jamie, you see was called up
on by the HIbernian Society for speech;
and, be jabers, rose with the enthusias-
tic cheers OF thousands, with my heart
overaowing with gratitude, and my eyes
filled with tears, and divil word did /
spaker
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

The Louisville Times in an exQuisitely
humorous tone says: The objections
which some ladies' pretend 10 have To
whiskers all arise from envy. They
can't have any. They would II They
could, but the fact is, the continual mouon
of the lower Jaw Is fatal TO Iiieir growth.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27
Dress of Circassian Women.

With respect TO the state-dress OF the
women, blue silk is the fayorite material
for the robe, which is generally braided
with gold or silver, and confined to the
waist by girdle similarly ornamented,
fastened with large silver or gold clasp;
and if to this we add a light shawl of
some gay color, partly arranged as tur-
ban, and partly falling in graceful icIds
over the neck and shoulders, with thl2
muslin veil, sufficiently large 10 envelop
the entire figure, we have the gala cos
tume of one of the daughters of Circassia.
The reader may imagine the effect OF
such lovely apparition, attended. like
Diana, by iavori,e dog, in the midst OF
The charming scenery OF that romantic
land. If the fair VISION should chance
TO sttrac, the admiring glances OF gallant
knight in search of a wife, he can always
tell by the color of her trowsers, whether
the wesrer be maid, wife, or widow
virgin white being worn by the young
olris; red by her who has assumed the
dnt;es Of a matron; and blue by the hap
less dame who mourns the death OF her
lord In everything else their dress Is
similar. except that the hair OF the young
DANES, instead of falling on the neck anu
shoulders like that of the married women
is arranged in ;h,ck plat behind con
fined a, the end by silver eo'o'
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

Somebody says that out west they fph,
with clubs as big as dogs body, One
chap out there laughs 10 loud that on one
OCCASION shock his ears off.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

A Tale of the Past--lhose H'auo
bustles and coffee bags.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

The brokers Of Washington are said 10
be paving 60 cents on the dollar for Sell
len. Wilhers & Co.'S pretty Little ''Promi-
;es 10 pay"
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

The entire know-Noihing ticket was
elected al Covinglou, KY, on the 9th b.
q large majority.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

Wrong--to snore in church OF h' yO''
dad when he is down.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

The year 1865, will be very even.ful
one--to every old maid who gets mar
ried
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27
TERMS 8l THE REGISTER

The SnsPuERDsrows REGISTER is published
weekly al - year, positively TO be paid before
The year expires. No paper discontinued Tex
cept at the option Of the editor) until all ar
rearages are paid up. Single copies q cents a
ADyERrIsEMENrs Of one square or less 'V
cents for the first insertion and % cents for eac
insertion Observation-Disclosures ones IN the same
proportion. Advertisements not marked Ior dI!
specified time are continued till forbid ana CIat,
gcd accordingly. A deduction made 10 tnoS0
who advertise by the year. ,,.
Letters or Communications to the hdl'or' up,
on which there is postage, unless they con'a'" in
money, should be postpaid TO insure a''eh'iO"'
AGENTS.
WM. II. PEAKE, Sun Iron Buildings balI-
more; G. PIERcE, Philadelphia '. D. FALMhN'
New York.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

Some cOveious wretch has stolen a pour
mans horse, cart aud Cye.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

The Worm that never dies N -
fsciion iha. you have cheated Inc f''n'
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

Tbe true picture of despair is pig
reaching through hole in the fence to get
at cabbage lying only a few inches BE-
vond his nose.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

Shocking ZINES - as he old wOma'
said when tie nghlning knocked her o,tI
lac WasbJUh.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

A medical writer speak oi two old
IL aids, $50 dry they rnfted ? The tel.
low out TO be indicted.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

The onion y! IS SAID, destroys the al
tractjve body OF the magnet. Il has .he
same effect with young ladies'.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

Which sffor.s eln lie most ssusisc
ton, 10 hear herself praised, Or ano.he
young un run down
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

Short calls are the best" as the Ay
sald when he lH on a hotsIove.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-01-27

| Never ask fal woman to team on Jour
The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1855-06-08
views from Venezuein.


GENERAL OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES OF AN INVASION
FROM NEW GRANADA-PREPARATIoSs FOE DE-
FESCE-FINANoIAL DIFFICULTIES ADJOURNMENT
OF CONGRESS- MINISTER TO wAsaMGTON-rHE
AYES ISLAND DIFFICULTY-CLAIMS OF VENEZUELA
--MARXETs.
By the brig Cuba arrived yesterday from Laguyra,
have received advices up to May rs.
We learn that all was quiet, though apprshensions
entertained by the that invasion Of
the province Of Maracaibo by New Granada might &C.
cur and troops pressed into the service to protect
the province in case Of any outbreak
The countrywas sunk into deplorable state Of bank
rupcy by the late admins tration under its imbeclle
President, but the present Ministry determined
TO exricate the country from its present difficulties
The American Minister, the Hon Charles Eames, is
proceeding satisfactorily in the duties of the legation
His duties likely to be ariuous for some time to
come 10 the prosecution of Amer lean claims for spola
The Congress had adjourned without adopting any i'm
portant aaures except the conddng the President
dictaion powers
American produce was in abundance, aud country
produce scarce and high Five Spanish vessels arrived
in the month Of Msy from Spain with -four. Thus
Spain mpeting with the American farmers in their
great staple, and -four was reduced 50 psr Dbl
Colonel Das chief of the Venezuelan navy, came pas
sepger In the brig Cuba, as q commissioner rom hie
government to settle the question and the Isle of
Fifty men had been pressed into the service and
10 have sailed in Of war; the Goth for the
Isles of AYES, additional force TO protect the
island Venezuela claims this valuable island by right
Of conquest from the original Inhabitants the BIRDS
and having planted their standard upon its soil In the
face OF the Yankees, who anxious to rob the
bircs Of their previous deposits that they omitted 20
ment Colonel Dias will prose 10 Washington, with
view to the recognition Of this newly acquired Tertiary
The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1855-06-08
Marine Affairs.

ANOTHER STEAMER FOR LIvERPooL.-The screw steamer
Star Of the South for years employed in the South
trade and recently running between this port and
Aspnwal is advertised to leave here the goth inst
for Liverpool.
THE Loss OF THE BARK HELEN PORTER Captain Porter
and crew. of the bark Helen Porter before reported lost
at Cape Hattera arrived yesterday evening" in the
schooner Entire from Cape Hatterss. Captain Porter
gives the following account of the loss Of his vessel
On the morning of 3oth, spoke an English brig bound
south who gave tie bearings of Cape Hatteras light
N. N E. distance sixteen miles, shaped my course &C
cordpgly, and east until judged Cape
Hatteras light to be bearing wss distance thirty five
miles. Sounded at and found bottom. At eight
p NJ. the ship kept an N. E. course, with
strong wind from and thick weather, and at nine
p. Nj. saw breakers ahead The helm was put down to
bring the ship around the off shore tack but she
missed stays and fell of before the wind and every
effort made to her around but before we sue.
ceeded the bark struck violently the bottom and m
mediatsly erited towards the breakers. We got our
long boat out and with great difficulty succeeded in
pulling OF shore. The next morning spoke the brig
Fornsx We stood in towards the breakers with our
bost in the hope Of efectng landing, but a. IA. sea
broke on the bar with much violence, were obliged
10 pull OF shore hoping to get tas of by pasux
vessel In this we di appointed, and as night was
mirg and having been laboripg sixteen hours at
the cars and the rain every moment increasing we re-
solved TO pull in towards the breakers and TO land At
ting off inside of the bar and With
flag directed with great sulty and danger to the
shore And we all feel grateful for the inter position Of
hind Providence in reecuipg from n watery grave
when death seemed inevitable The place where the
vessel struck Cape Hatteras Inlet bar had not
had observation since leaving Cape Florida as the
weather had been very thick and stormy.
M. o. PORTER,
late Master bark Helen Porter
The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1855-06-08


PHMApELPHIA STOCK BOARD.
PHILADELPHIA June Z, 1856.
Money plenty Stocks steady. Reading, 46x; Norris
Canal 14x Long island Railroad, 1871; Pennsylvania
Railroad, 4s3<; Pennsyivania State Fives, SO
BALTIMoRE CATTLE MARKET.
Ge BALTIMORE, June Z, 1856
FIVE nun0rcd heef cattle offered to-day, and
slight decline submitted TO- S-ls- neAu ~ ~ q
$lI Is net hogs and in demand Sales at 81 rs
q IS per hundred.
BUFFALO, June 7-6P.M
Flour-The market Ia dull and favors buyers. The
demand to-day has been very light and the sales
not over00 bbls at 81 50 50 for good brands Wis
contip and $40 IL $40 % for fancy Michigan. Wheat
inactive-buyers holding of. Sales 600 bushels red
Wisconsin 81 15 Corn lower Supply good and demand
limited. Sales 90 600 bushels at SIC $50. Oats-no
sales Pork in good request Sales SEQ bbls At SIS so
$40 for clear mess Whiskey two cents lower-supply
good Sales rs bbls at 34c Canal Heights not
fIm-oats &c., and corn 13h lac. to New York.
Receipts for the "a hours ending to-day-Aour,
1917 bbIs; whest; corn 13. OLA bills OATS none.
ALBANY, June T-12:30 p. NJ,
1t has been raining here all the morning. There has
been nothing done in four Corn-Sales 600 bushels
yellow round by railroad At 81 o. and 500 bushels
Western mixed at 81 05 We have sales of wheat
cats to report
O5wEGo June 7--6 80 P. NJ
Flour Sales to-day, 1000 bbls at 50 SO $40 so for
common to extra State. Wheat dull sales SEQ bushels
at So 0s for upper Lake and 80 80 for white Michigan
and Canadian. Corn dull at &c. 99c. The receipts
have been small to day that they not worth tee.
graphing. 1t has rained very heavily all day.
The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1855-06-08
The Chamber OF Commerce.

The Chamber Of Commerce heIda meetiog In the Mer-
chants Bank yesterday On taking the CHAIR the Pre-
tdent p Perit presented his acknowledgements to
the board for his reelection He remarked that the re-
presentations and actions Of the Chamber of Commerce
had always been favorably received blythe State and
National Legislatures, and BY the community at large
during all the long term Of its existence since the year
176s. He thought that this fact should appeal as a
stimusnt 10 the members Of the Chamber to maintain
that influence by prompt and cient action on the i'm.
portsLt subjects continually claiming their attention.
The only business OF importance that up for con-
alteration that embodied In a communi ,ation re-
ceived from Hon. Mr. Merritt Of Quebec in relation to
the reciprocity treaty Mr. Merritt recommends to the
Chamber Of Commerce the necessity of urging upon our
next Congress- the matter of extending the principle of
reciprocity to all articles produced by Canada and the
United States The communication referred to the
Special Committee upon the Reciprocity Treaty, which
was appointed 10 January last.