The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1855-02-14


Then unused upon the adage
Till my wisdom was perplexed,
And wondered, as the churchman
Dwell upon his holy text,
Which of all who heard his lesson
Should require the service next
Whose will be the next occasion
For the flowers, the feast, the wine?
Thine, perchance, my dearest lady,
Or, who knows?-it may be mine
What if t were--forgive the fancy
What if It were-both mine and thine?
1T is often said that no kind of sense is 5
rare as common sense; and this is true, sin
ply because common sense is attainabe by
far more, and is q natural gift far less, tina
most other traits Of character. Common sens
is the application of thoughtto common things
and it is rare, because most persons viii No
exercise thought about common things.
some important affair occurs, people try the
to think, but to very little purpose; because
not having exercised their powers on small
things, their powers lack the development ne
cessary for great ones Hence, thoughtles
people, when forced to act in an affair Of i'm
portance, blunder through it with no mort
chance Of doing as they should, than ont
would have Of hitting a small or distant mari
at shooting match, if previous practice had
not given the power Of hitting objects that are
large and near.
An instance Of elegant pronunciation, illus
trated by human sentiment, was given ii
the national house of representatives few
days since. An Indian appropriation bill was
under discussion, when the delegate from Ore
gon undertook to enlighten the house ssMr.
speaker saidihe, ataint no use trying to civil
ize the Indians Of Oregon. They care moth
ing about treaties. They'll rob and murder
whenever they can get chance. The only
way to treat the critters is to scalp em''
An Indian had gone to Albany one cold
winters day, and got very drunk. On his
way home, he became completely overcome,
lay down, and was frozen to death. His tribe
was at that time much disposed to initiate the
habits of white men, and accordingly held an.
inquest over the dead body. After a long
powwow, they finally agreed 10 the verdict,
that the deceased came to his death "by mix
ing too much water in his whiskey, which had
frozen in him and killed him.
Against SANDER there is no defence. He'll
cannot boast so foul an end, nor man deplore
SO foul foe. 1t stabs with a word, with
nod, with shrug, with a look, with smile |
1t is pestilence walking in darkness, spreading
contagion far and wide, which the most weary
traveller cannot avoid. 1t is the heart-search-
ing dagger Of the assassin. It is the poisoned
arrow whose wound is incurable. It is as
mortal as the sting Of the most deadly asp;
murder is its employment, innocence its prey,
and ruin its sport.
Progress is the benefcent law Of the race
We cannot be circumscrbed within the range
of our fathers ideas, any more than we can
y1ca tbair did ;r,,,l,,,,
the race can not be confined within the swad-
ding bands of the infancy. In the end, too,
we may add, the party Of progress is sure
to triumph. More or less rapidly, the new opin-
ION supplants the old. Conservative age dies,
hopeful youth succeeds to its powers. 4
Local politics run high in the western coun-
try. A candidate for county clerk in Texas
offered to register marriages for nothing. His [
opponent, undismayed, promised to do the
same and throw cradle in.
A friend relates the following A mile or
two from town, be met boy on horseback J ]
crying with cold, s.Why don't you get down
and lead him? that's the way to keep warm rs :
mo, said the boy, it's BIB borrowed boss, g
and I'll ride him if freeze"
DR.. Casin having heard the famous Thos. J
Fuller repeat some verses on scolding wife Y
was 50 delighted with them as to request a n |;
copy. There is no necessity for that" said
Fuller, "as you have got the original, :
Can you tell me, asked pundit, "why a n
conumdrum that nobody can guests like a
ghest?' Shall tell you now, or next mont? o. e
Now if you please .sWell, sir, sooner Or
later every one must give it up Ir
A lawyer having some legal business to Nj
transact with "a widow lady, took occasion to e e
inquire her age. The matron, who had Ionp
since dotted the widows weeds, attempted to
ook prim and much younger than she really Ell
vas, as she replied e
Thirty five years, sir.
Then turning TO the daughter, he said
May be 50 bold, miss, as to inquire your
Ige9''
Certainly. I am little past thirty two, e
most three years younger than mother !,
Voltaire's definition Of a physician is: Gan 81
Unfortunate gentleman, expected every day to 9
erform miracle; namely, to reconcile health L
With intemperace." pt
II does not require much to create panic ar
he first suspension Of the bank Of England
'as caused in this way: An old woman was 70
I'M over in Threadneedle street, London, and ~
ad her leg broke. The accident happened
lst in front of the bank, and large crowd II
Don collected. A person passing inquired =
hat was the matter. A wag in the crowd - -
,plied, they were making run upon the bank. as.
his was soon reported, and the crowd rush in
to have their notes redeemed, and in "a
ours the institution was obliged to close its II
oors. I
A western exchange says that the prettiest IL f,s
ay Of dunnng ever devised, was lately prac- ~ -
ed in that vicinity. A very pretty young r.
oman accosted a debtor thus, husband has i
ade me present Of that little bill You owe al;
M u
The South American officials are curious ISM
t. When government or army officer is a ass
trusted with public money, he sets to gam Pie Pie
ing with the first individual that will crafty bic
M. When one has lost all his money, the 10
her spends all the winnings with bis money
becoming helplessly drunk; thus they pay G.
t once for two great pleasures. Let these ~
aniards alone for extracting the very largest swe
lount of fun from the smallest amount Of wv
,ney. NJ,
"The Evansville Indiana Journal says that sale
old gentleman, aged sixty-fye years, was groe
srried few days ago, in Knox county. In