Democrat and sentinel. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1853-1866, 1855-03-29
An Election Speech.

= LADIES AND GENTLEMEN / rise--but
there's no use telling you that-yoq know I'm
up well as do I'm modest man-yery
but I've never lost picayune by it in my
life because its scarce commodity among
candidates. / thought / would mention it, for
fear if 1 didn't you would never be lucky in
finding it out. - a
Candidates generally considered as
nuisanees- but they are not; they are the poll
test men in the world, shake you BY the hand,
and ask how's your family, what's the pros
pect for crops. &c I'm the politest man in
the State. I'm not only the poltest man, but
the best electioneerer-yo ought to see me
shaking hands with all the yariations-the
pump-handle and the pendulum, the cross-cut
and wiggie-waggle understand the SCIENCE
perfectly If any of the country candidates
wish instructions, let them come 10 me-
Fellow citizens: | was born-if L had not
been wouldn't have been a candidate-but
| was going to tell you where. 1t was not in
the Mississippi, but twas on the north side of
the negro line; yet that is not compliment,
as the negroes are mostly born in the same
side Istarted In the world as poor as church
mouse, yet came honestly by my poverty,
for inherited it and If did start poor, no
man can say but that I've held my own pretty
well.
Candidates generally ask You if you think
they are qualified, &c Now don't ask your
thoughts-I ask your votes. Why, there's
nothing to think of except to watch that Swans
name is not on your ticket if it is. think to
scratch it off and put mine on. I'm certain.
I'm competent-for who ought to knoW better
than do? Nobody
win allow that Swan is the best auditor.
that is till Pm elected Then perhaps it is
not proper for me to say any thing more. Yet.
as an honest man, I'm bound to say that its
grievous sin to hide anything from my fell
low-citizens. Therefore say it's my private
opinion, publicly expressed. that III make the
best auditor ever in the United States.
'Tls not for honor wish to be auditor for,
in my own county / was offered an Office, that
was all honor-coroner- which respectfully
declined The auditors Office is worth some
SIS, 900 year, and am in for IT like a thou
sand of brick. To show my goodness of heart
| I'll make this offer to my competitor. am
sure of being elected, and he viii lose some
thing by the canFsss therefore / am willing
to divide equally with him, and make those
two offers: I'll take the salary and he may
have the honor ; or he may have the honor,
and II take the salary. In the way of honors
haye received enough to satisfy me for life.
| went out to Mexico. eat pork and beans.
slept in the rain and mud, ndswallowed every
thing except live Mexicans When l was
ordered to =. CO." went; = charge" charged;
and break for the chapparral.' you had bet
ter believe beat quarter nag in doing my
duty --s st as siz,x 80 q
My competitor, Swan, is bird of golden
plumage, who has been swimming for the last
four years in the auditors pond at So, 900
year I am for rotation. want to rotate
him out, and to rotate myself in There's
plenty of room for him out side of that pond.
therefore pop IN your votes for me-Pll Pop
him out, andpop myself IN. -. ~L VIZ -
/ am for a division of labor. Swan says
he has to work all the time with his nose down
upon the public grind-stone: -Four years
must have ground it to point Poor fellow.
the public ought not TO insist on having the
handle of his mug ground clean off. / have
leather l rush to the post of duty / offer
stone Fellow-cltixens, grind away, till |
heller e,,uf. and thatll be some time first.
Times most out Well, i like to forget to
tell you my name. It's Daniel--(for short.
Dan; not handsome name, for my parents
were poor people. who lived where the quality
appropriated all the nice names; therefore
they had to take what was left and divide
around among us-but it's as handsome as !
am)-R. Russell Remember every one Of
you, that it's not Swan
am sure to be elected; so one and all,
great and small. short and tan, when you come
down to jackson, after the election, stop at
the auditors of6ce-the latch-stFing hangs
out-enter without knocking, lake of your
things, and make yourself at home