Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1855-08-18


ances, look as if they might be something
when finished. One is intended as no.
tel. There are also three printing OIL
ces, or three newspapers, (the population
not over 600.) There is no doubt that
these papers are supported by the aboIl-
tonists of the East. as the editors have
the appearance of Being Ied at the public
expense. To conclude with this, town
lots sell for $500. There were about
dozen Yankees who started this town or
city, as it is called, with the intention OF
making their fortunes. II yet remains Ia
be seen how they will succeed. The
three newspapers in the place are only IN
tended 10 stir up the feelings of The public
against the slave States, and also 10 puff
up their city lots which are at present
.hot-beads for disease. In fact, the whole
affair at the present time is not fit for a
white man to show his head in.
MARRIED OR SINGLE.-How is it that
girls can always tell a married man from
a single one. the fact is indisputabIe.--
The philosophy Of is beyond our ken
| Blackwood says, "that the fact Of matIi-
mony or bachelorship is written IegibIy in
mans appearance that no ingenuity can
conceal it. Everywhere, there is some
ineXplcable instincts that tell us whether
an individual (whoSe name, fortune and
circumstances arc totally uuknowu) be or
not a married man. Whether is a certain
subdued look, such as that, which charac-
terizes the lions in meuagarie, and dis
tinguishes them from the lords of the des-
ert, we cannot tell; but that the truth is so,
we positively affirm"
! THE OLD MAID PoPLARs.-'The Poplar is
said 10 have been imported from iombardy
| byChancelLor Livingston. In newspaper
slip now before us, taken from, we know
not where, it is said that this gentleman
greatly pleased with a tree so common to
| Italy, so unknown then at home, be proc
ured a supply of poplar, brought them to
This country, and cultivated them for
time with great success: but, alas! he had
dlsregarded the laws of nature--unCons-
ciously separalingthe male and female ire.
es, and because the ocean flowed between
them, the female, which had come TO Am
erica, plned for It's mate, and could no lon.
ger be perfected or perpetuated. Therefore
il is, that all the poplars we see in our
country are shriveIed, withered and soured
First class Of geography, come up and
let's see what you know, Bill Toots, what
is cape'
a thing that mother wears across her
shouIdcrs.'
What is a plaiu?'
"A tool used by carpenters for smoothing
off boards
what is a DESERT?
Goodies after dinner
'That'II do, Bill, I'll give you goodies
after school
young lady recently from boarding
school, being asked at table if she would
take some more cabbage replied:
"By no means, astronomical
safety admonishes me that have arrived
at the ultimate Of culinary degIulilion con-
sistent with the code of EscuIapIus.
Punch savs-"A man who goes TO church
to chew tobacco and spit on the floor, ought
10 be taken by the head and heels and
scrubbed upon the soied spot until il is
made clean"
A country editor thinks that Columbus
is not entitled 10 much credit for discover
ing America, as the country IS so large he
could not well have missed il.
1t is supposed bv Dr.. Francis hat the
first person that had the itch was the Dew
thence the tile "'The old Scratch.
A man named Suckucy, living in tie
Naumee county. conceived the strange
whim of calling his children /, 2, 3, and
so on. The last we had heard Of hln.he
had reached the number Q. Nine SiIckuey
IS the name Of the last child.
An editor SAYS that lrleni Of his car
rics his sense OF honor so far, as TO spend
all his time in perfect ldlenc~s, because he
does not even Ike to LaEc aduaHiGge Of
lime.
The following toast was recently given
4 'ssuickcn" young mn: The ladies'.
May We kiss the girl, We please, AMI
please the girl, We Kiss.
FlDGErTY.-Woacn Al all ,rucs-Hhen
they are young. because they fear uev
Will be Old maids. and Whon iHry are old