The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1855-04-25

a man who marries rich wife must expec
occasionally to have it flung in his teeth. W
have heard report, however, which we thin
must have silenced such threats. A gentle
nan who had the misfortune to marry for
tune was once exhibiting the fine points of hi
horse to friend
.My horse, if you please said the wife
emy money bought that horse
Eyes, madam" replied the husband, with
bow, land your money bought me. =
/ A passenger on board of one of our rail
roads the other day, when accosted for tht
amount of his fare, replied that he had nothing
with him except one large bill which he fearec
the conductor would be unable to change. The
latter thinking from the mans general appear
ance that he could not be very flush, replied
that change would be given for any bill be
could produce, whereupon the suspicious look
ing customer handed out an enormous circus
bill. The conductor as in duty bound present
ed him a check and affectionately enioined
him to guard against all personal injury dur
ing the trip. Columbus Statesman.
/ At camp-meeting, last summer, not more
| than fifteen hundred miles from Boston, the
trumpet had called the congregation together,
| but a crowd of oilers and rowdies stood out
side the range of seats and would not come in.
The presiding elder invited them twice with no
effect. Then, after singing hymn, he turned
to the crowd and said-"As many of you as
hav mt got the itch or small pox, or any other
cutaneous disease, we shall be glad to have
come forward. All others will remain out
side" No one was left out.
Francois de Montmorency, more commonly
known under the name of Bouttevile was one
of the most noted duellsts of his time. Hav
ing incurred the displeasure of Louis XIII. by
his hand in the death of Busy D Ambrose, he
was arrested as he was quitting France. He
was tried and condemned to death, May 2lst
1927, and executed the following day at the
place de Greve, with great military pomp. He
was exceedingly anxious to preserve his nous
taches. The bishop Of Nantes, who attended
the doomed man, observed to him, ooh! my
son, you must not dwell on worldly matters Do
you think still of life?'' II think only of my
moustaches-the very finest in France" re-
piled the penitent .--.-.
Rogues in rags are kept in countenance by
rogues in ruffles.
The preacher that warns up his hearers
with words that burn, has been consulted with T
by the deacons upon the propriety Of having
no fire in the church for the balance Of the
season. =5-z .-.r .z=
How is it that girls can tell married man
from single one? The fact is indisputable.
Some malicious person asserts that the let
ers NJ; D., which are placed after physicians
names, signify "Money Down."
At the printers festival in Lowell, the fol-
owing definitions were given: True progress;
absorption in advance. Old fogyism-owing
printers BILL ..........T.-
The lady who tried to read by the light of
ther days, subsequently took camphcne
amp.
The strongest kind of a hnt-A young lady
skiing gentleman to see if one of her rings :
7ould go on his little finger. I
"Have you any fish in your bag?' asked g
arson of a fisherman, who was returning home. 9
Eyes, a good ELL was the slippery reply. =
The people of Palmer have voted to abolish ri
eir liquor agency, because, says the Journal, "
some of their liquor would not burn, some ID
ould freeze, and it was limited strongly that -,
me would eat holes through horse blanket as
ID take the hair from the ANIMAL NJ