Fremont journal. [volume] (Fremont, Sandusky County [Ohio]) 1853-1866, 1855-12-14
A Rich Lecture on Astronomy.

Ethan Spike, Esq, of Hornby, Me-, writes
the following letter to the Portland Trans
cript and Eclectic, descriptive of matters
and things in that part of the country. Our
readers will enjoy his amusing report Of the
lecture on Astronomy:
MISTER EDITER Perhaps in letterery
pint of view aour town hant been so forrer-
ed as she ortcr. While Polly-ticks and the
millingtary interest has been carrid furder
perhaps than in any other place on the airth
yet excepting my own case, litteratoor hasn't
gone beyond coarse hand writing on the
single rule of three. Ferlosofy has been
quoted in this market below pork syence
hasn't compared with Syder, string beans
has generally sot higher than stronemy, let
ters led trigernometry and punkins ahead Of
poetry Naow, haowsever. the table is
turned bottom side under. Syenee is ris!
We've got a Lie-see-um! The cry Of
Letters begun, the tree of nollidge has
has sprouted, interlect biles over matter
that ere interlect which has bin dormouse
is now reused like a sleeply lion gittin away
from Jordan.
The fust lectur of the season was gin last
night by James Peabody, who's bin one
quarter to an academary.
General lsubjek-STRoNoMY
Partickele- ditto-CoMCs.
haint time to gin you more'n digestive
or fac-smilar of the lecter:
Jemes begun by observing that eff any
body supposed fhat the stars warent heap
bigger than they looked, they mas almighty
behind hand. Why, sez he, there's that lee
tie sinner called Satan, says he, don't look
bigger than tater, and yet accoring to
Herklysf-who knows the heavenly body
iist as well as l know father-tis sumwat
larger than the hull of Oxford! An the
leetelest star you could pick aout, is as big
as a cart wheel. At this pint Dea. Elder
berry ris an said this wus going too fur twas
regular blasfeeme contrary to scripture an
agin common sens. Then he tuck his hat
an cleared, fust spittin aout his terbaker cud
as a testimony agin the doctrine.
After speaking of the milky-way-which
he said was longer than the Cumberland OF
Oxford Canawl-an themoon, which the on
larned considered to be a green cheese, but
which science demonstrated to be a jacker-
lantern on a large scale, the lecture procee,
dcd to pertickeler part of his su6jeck.
CoMICT OR BLAzN STARS.
Comics, says Jemes,-savs he-are of two
kinds, the Tame and the Wild. The fust
is peaceable tother aint. The fust one Is
made of old moon as aint fit forservice, and
is called by the oneddikated shootin stars,
but we of the school call en- metres. This
difference led the speaker to remark that
larnin is everythin.
The wild kind, sez Jemes, Is different
crittur: bein composed of nebulous matter,
hyfolution gass, oxside of cast iron, an salts
of harmonic, makes it highly salvage and
onsartan They fust appeared about Deu-
teronomy or perhaps little later in the
year six, and was eiskivered spontaneously
from Portland Observators and Pompev's
pillow in Rooshy. They are, pesky thing,
says he, oilers gittin up wars, hurricanes and
airthquaknes, &c Oneasy and restless,
travlin about faster than a rale-rode, but nev-
er reachin anywheres in. pertickeler Kin
der dominated Peter Riggs. Mighty on
sartain, they ar-can't be depended on
Father Miller engaged one to do perticke-
Ter job in '43, but it probably got better
terms somewhercs else, an that ere job re-
mains ondone to this day.
But now, says, Jemes, we come to con-
slider their tails. Them, says he, is raal nu-
merous. Talk about the moons 'wonderous
taleP Why the tales of all the PLANES in
the cinderal heavingS wouldn't make one for
fust rate wild comic! Longer than the
manetic paragraph and wider than Sebago
pond, they stretches aout over the universl
kanerpy in the unlimited nugacity of either
now sweepin' down among the elongate
concavities of diurnal convexities and agin
sorein upwards till lost in the CRATE hyperi-
on!
Jemes was so used up by this peoration
that he had to be eurried hom on cheer
This morning, however, he was we'll as
could be expected, and eff convalescence
don't set in he'll be about in day or two.
ETHAN SPIKE.