Burlington free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1827-1865, 1855-06-15
MISCELLANY.
What n pair OF AndirOns cost.

Peter, said my uncle. knocking the ashes
from his pipe, and laying it on the corner of
the shelf, and then fixing his eyes on the
andirons. Peter, those andirons cost me
one thousand dollars =
Dear me y exclaimed my aunt
'Oh, father = cried the girls.
Impossible y said I.
True, every word true One thousand
did | say l-yes--two thousand-full two
thousand dollars :,
WE'LL well, said my aunt, folding up her
knitting for the night, | should like to know
what you are thinking about
My uncle bent forward, and planting his
hands firmly on his parted kness, and with a
deliberate air, which showed no doubt Of his
being able to prove his assertion, he began -
Well. you see, great many years ago,
we had pair of common old androns. Your
cousin Lefty says one day Father don't
you think these old andirons are getting too
shabby . Shabby or not, thought they
would hold the wood up as nicely us if they
were made of gold. Soon after that, Peter
continued my uncle. your aunt took it
up
There it goes, interrupted my aunt,
you can't get along without dragging
me in
Your aunt took it up, Peter, and she said,
and they were no better off than we were -
And she said Lefty and her sister Jane were
Just getting old enough to see company, and
the stingy looking andirons might hurt their
market. knew that women will have their
own way, and there is no use in objecting
and so | got the andirons.
The price ofthem was four dollars and a
half
'Ah, that's more like it., cried my aunt ;
thought you said $4,000 .
My dear, | wish you would not interrupt
me. Four and a half. Well, the first night
after we had got them a. we all sat by the
warm fire talking over the matter, Lefty
called my attcrtion to the hearth, the stones
of which were cracked and uneven. The
hearth was entirely out of keeping with the
new andirons, and | thought might as well
have it replaced first as last. The next day
mason was sent for to examine it. He came
in my absence, and when | returned home,
your aunt and cousin all beset me at once to
have marble slab, and they put their heads
together
La me = exclaimed my aunt, there was
no putting heads together about it, The
hearth was a real worn out thing, not fit for
a pig pen.
They put their heads together, Peter, as
was saying, and continued till got Il mar
BILE hearth, which cost me twenty dollars at
least. Then | thought ! was done with
expenses, but was wrong. Soon began to
hear sly hints thrown out about the brick
work around the fire place not correspond
ing with the hearth | stood out a moment
or two against your aunt and the girls but
they at length got the better of me, and
was forced to have marble instead of brick. -
and then the old wooden mantel piece was
SO out Of the character that it was necessary
to have marble one The cost of all this
was nearly one hundred dollars. And now
that the spirit of improvement had got a
start, there was no stopping. The new mar
BILE mantle put to shame the old white-washed
walls, and they must be painted, of course,
and to prepare them for paint sundry repairs
were necessary. When this was going on
your aunt and the girls appeared to be quite
satisfied, and when it was done, they had nc
iIea that the old paror could be made tc
look SO spruce. But this was only a short
respite. The old rag carpet began to raise
dust, and found there would be NJ
peace
Now, my dear = SAID the old lady, with
pleasant smile, accompanied with partia
rotation of the head
Now, father . exclaimed the girls
Till | got new carpet That, again
.hamed the old furniture, and it had to b.
turned out and replaced with new. Now
Peter, count, my lad-twenty dollars for th
hearth, and one hundred and thirty for tn
mantel- piece and repairs. What does tina
make =
One hundred and fifty, uncle
Well, fifty for paper and paint =
Two hundred
Then fifty for carpet, and one hundre
at last for furniture
'Ahem There's that clock, too, and til
blinds-ffty more
Ny aunt and cousin wnked at each othel
Now continued my uncle, SO much fo
this one room. No sooner was the room fir
ishcd than the complaint came from all quai
ters about the dining-room and entry Lon
before this ! had surrendered at discretion
, and handed in my submission, The dining
I room cost two hundred more. What do,
that count, Peter '
Eight hundred, uncle.
Then the chambers-at least four hundrC
to make them chime with the down stairs. '
Twelve hundred
Tho outside of the house had to be repai
ed and painted, Of course. And two hundrt
for that y
Fourteen hundred
Then there must be piazza in front
that cost two hundred,
Sixteen hundred
Here aunt began to yawn, Lefty to pol
the fire and Jane to twirl over the leaves
a book
\ new carriage came next, Petor tn
cost two hundred dollars
l.. Eighteen hundred dollars
c Then there was a lawn to be laid out al
neatly fenced-a servant to be hired-parti
J. given occasionally-bonnets and dresses
+ double the former cost, and hundred 9th
d little expenses in keeping with the new ord
!. Of things. Yes, Peter, was entirely with
bounds when said two thousand dollars
n The opposition was silent. My aunt inu
diately rose and guessed it was bedtime.
was left alone with my uncle, who was u
inclined to drop the subject. lie was p'
seyeriug man, and never gave up what
undertook, till he had done the work Tho
oughly. So he brought out his books a
accounts, and set about making an exa
estimate of the expenses. lie kept me
:" till after midnight, before he got throug
in His conclusion was, that the pair of andiro
cost him tNyantv-I,ur hnn1rnt md GI