Butte record., 1855-11-24

the usu, lrouod, and iph.cts upon them
the duties Of wife, those Ii tie chickering's
and discordant Earrings, which are now at
'tributed, and with great truth, to the
heads of families, would cease, and una
ninity of feeling prevail, for as some
body has said: "there is no disparity in
marriage Ike unsuitabiIity of mind and
purpose" That is 50. If the NAL
member of the hymeaial frm is of
mind to come home at a late hour of the
night, put his trowsers in bed, and hang
himself over the back IF chair, the fe-
male part of the institution nut be Of
the s'me mind, and permit Tim to do it.
If it is his purpose t, 60 into the crocke.
rv business and retail "lamily j9rs" il
must be hers likewise. Then would
their desires and wants become mutual
"a contamination devoutly to b. wished
then would the high pressure boat Of
time fl at them gently down life's great
current without surging. Then all
would be harmony, peace and piety.-
Nusty bachelors would be at . premium,
the connubial life would be sought for as
a double track to glory, over which we
could glide at 2.4o speo d, as smoothly
as an ice cream down an urchin's throat,
gently landing in the realms Of bliss,
amid tat babies, strawberry jim, otto Of
roses and buckwheat cakes.
But "there's no use o. talking" yon
might make a politician honest, Or flow
ers to grow on hand saw, but make
that compound essence Of all that IS pre-
c;ous, woman, rcnounce her whims, no,
never by Jingo. But that's not the
point; my object in Yet as Jeemes
Pipes used to say--by The way Jeem 5
was unexpectedly $ lied with fit the
other evening while at a concert-he Is
now conyalescent, however, which IS for
tunate as his attending physician pro-
nounced it a genn ne Bene tit contracted
for him by his lends, in consideration
Of his untimely deprivation OF valuable
consideration by he late failure Of a
bank speculation. The house was cram
med, as a tn key should be before
"ThanksgiyiDg''-but there was no ne
oessity for it, as the voice of the first
singing lady filled the house a voice Of
immense dimensions, though Of exquisite
tone and finish, as We say OF pianoforte,
and SO powerful well, yoke Of Bar
nuns stuffed elephants couldn't have
Judged it, But that is not the pom: :;
my object in thus-Uz "a how cold it
is ; if this weather predomina,es have
sneaking no,ion that [ shat reverse the
decision 50 recently but reluctantly made
by me. In Inc combined forts O.: the
poet and JingIes--
Breathos there a man with soul s. deal,
Who meier, in winter, to himself hath
said,
I'll no longer sleep alone, on a sing'e
bed
Kinked up Ike a Chinaman with the
cholic. reckon not Then where !;
O, where is the delectable young female
who is disposed to unite with me in
founding an association for the proper
Advancement Of the human family. Ugh
marry of course 1 will if it is only to
get a seIf-acting warming pan, fea her
bed generator Of heat. Where's the
gal3 Don't all yell at once She must
be like Paddy's dancing, strong, if not
handsome, of sound constitution, with
fall knowledge of cooking utensils and
meaning of the word oBEY, partial to ba>
bies, and willing to undertake the care Of
a large family. Come, scream out !;
who's afraid ; what though matri-money
Is hard currency, and woman bitter
pill to swallow. I'll gulp it if | can get
one that is sugar coated.
Yours. MatrimoniaIly Traqical,
july Jtngles.
But that is not the point, my object in
addressing you was to give the news Of
the day, items oflocal interest, views or
lginal and otherwise but the solemn
length to which l have been constrained
to proceed in my Introductory, forbids
the fulflment of my design.
If it is your pleasure that again ad-
dress you, shall be most happy. J. j.
The RaVel Troupe.
We see by the bay papers that this