Daily American organ. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1856, 1855-08-18
CITY INTELLIGENCE.


last night OF this splendid troupe. Their choice
entertainments no less than their g,nllemanly
bearing, recommend them alike 10 liberal p tron-
age. But Ii Is no use 10 say that since they need
no notice or commentator from u.s. Everybody
goes that has quarter, and stands any chance Of
getting in.
Give them one more "bumper at parting"
We understand that they appear in Baltimore
next week, and will there be party to en-
tertanment gotten up for the charitable intention
OF aiding the distressed community of Norfolk and
Portsmouth. Let il be remembered, also, that
the talented and interesting Wells children viii
also appear.
DEPARTMENT NEws--ExrRA.--By special dis.
pensation and purely out of favor to the Aneri-
can Organ, we have obtained, in advance of all
other papers, the following rules and regulations
which now have obtained in the Treasury Depart
ment
First, that every claimant hereafter appearing
before this Department. and every officer of what
ever grade, whose accounts audited through
any Of the bureaus thereof, shall be presumed TO
be afascal until proved to be otherwise and all
good citizens civil and military, are requested to
aid the department in carrying out so very praise
worthy an end.
Second, it Is beheld that employees OF the De-
partmenf formerly called accountants then clerks,
and formerly In virtue Of their oaths to support
the Constitution, &c. considered to be responsible
agents, are hereafter to be considered mere auto
nations or TOOLS fit only to do the bidding of their
masters, and are hereafter to be denominated
hands" helps" or "slews," as may please the
fancy Of the aforesaid masters, coming from North
or South.
Third, that in view of the utter ncapacity
OF the head of the Department, all power in
all the premises (saye the new-wing foundation
now in the hands of Irish) shall be vested in one
P. @. Mogul, who shall hold in his individual hands
the meat and bread of every poor clerk who shall
be suspected Of having any will opinion Of his
own; and who SHALL moreover, have such COM
maiid Of their persons to shift them from one
Office to another, without the slightest regard to
their fitness or the exigencies Of the public SER
vice--just as gamester would shuttle pack of
cards--always provided knave of dark suit
shall be on top.
Fourth, it is ordered that no greater expedition
shall be used in the settlement of public business
than sufficient 10 justify flaming report of pro.
greas in some newspaper that wants an item very
much, 1.-THE american Organ for instance,) the
policy Of which It is hoped will be manifest to every
one concerned since, when " Sam" shall sweep out
the Augean stable, year after next, there will be
mo more work for old uncle Ned, unless accounts
are go complicated that we alone can unrave them.
Fifth, 1t is ordered and adjudged that Congress
IL an aas to suppose that it has any authority
away public money unless on previous consuta-
ton with the aforesaid Mogul; and that until next
March twelve month he shall be the sole judge Of
the law, the equity, the justice and the expedency
of any act involving money coming from that g sec
ond class" authority.
Sixth ordered, That hereafter, in view of the many
private axes to grind" on the part of Secretary,
first, second and third assistants, which precludes
to great extent, the possibility Of attending TO
the cases Of repentant frighted or purchased
Know-Nothing recruits to party and to church,
there shall be known and recognised, two new Off
GERS to be called the "Confessor General" and
"Denouncer Extraordinary" who, between the two
shall "spot" "haul up and receive the "expe-
renee" "abjuration,' &c., Of the aforesaid poor
devils, and publish them--provided that this CON
Tossing and the publication shall be done for the
honor of the thing and further, that the De-
nouncer shall not receive more than 5000 additional
salary.
Seventh, that Mr. Sockdologer shall have every
attention possible in going round, and SHALL under
no circumstances, be subjected to the usual compli-
ment Of being kicked out by the messengers.
sAsIrARY--Another correspondent has sent MS
the following, on the subject Of alleys:
".A twenty foot alley in the rear is the boast
of many who have city lots for sale but twenty
foot alley in the rear is the greatest of all abom
nations if not attended to in the most rigid manner
Take walk due castwsrdIy for the distance Of
two blocks from Seventh street, between Pennsy
vania avenue and the canal or go into the alley in
the rear of the Baptist Church fronting on Tenth
street. between and 7, and then judge whether
twenty feet alleys may not be the most f'rtid Of
all alleys"
OF these particular alleys we have no further
knowledge than conveyed in the above, But
we DO know of Others in various sections OF the
city. Now that the yellow fever is in the vicinity
and that cholera may be regarded as an ever
present evil, too much cannot be taken in
having the streets and alleys clean.
We have commissioners paid well for that pur-
pose, who, as far as we know, attend to their bu-
siness very well. But We do submit that, how.
ever faithful, they cannot do everything, and at
once.
they need the cooperation of every citizen /;
and, really, any man who would subject himself 10
the danger Of disease, simply because a commits
sioner is paid for keeping his premises clean, de-
serves to be sick. If cleanliness is akin to God
liness," let persons consider il in Christian as
well as practical point Of view.
"GALLows LIrERArURE"-" Monsieur Tonson
come again. Thomas Phillips, who was yester-
day In limbo for being drunk in the street, was
In the pen this morning for the same offence,
notwithstanding his promises to leave the city in
the first boat lie said he took one single drink
10 steady his lerves, which drink solitary and
alone," put Thomss's "bal in notion" lie plead
hard for his " libeithy," but the Captain was in
exorable. A happy and novel thought strikes him.
II might succeed. A contract with the penslty
all on one aide. Captain, IL you let me off this
time, and ever come back, you may hit me thir.
ty-nine lashes on my naked back" Agreed and
Tom moseyed.
Alas, that we have not public whipping post.
The chief of police would take most Of the bust.
ness from the criminal court, and save the govern
ment thousands.
Rotginger Wnkleman and another law breaker,
whose name could neither be spelled nor read by
himself or anybody elsa pair hunting in cou-
plesn for Know Nothings ii may he, were furnish
cd with lodgings.
John Clark, boy Of eleven, vagrnnt, hard sent
down.
Eugene Lutheran, aged twenty-five, drunk aS
usual sobered. Samuel Westoott, do. do. Thos.
Clark, alias Sutton, hailing from Virginia, alias
somewhere else, for stealing; case not concluded
when we left. Besides, sundry colored boys, more
or less hardened in yilany whose presence in the
guard-house illustrates, more forcibly than words
possibly could the necessity for the machine above
alluded to- rs well as more stringent laws for the