The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1855-12-19
An Illinois farmer, writing to Chicago pa.


per about the expenses Of settler, says, sthis
living will vary. according to tie size Of his
family, and their propensity TO crafty pride,
which is always an expensive article in new
country The good farmer might have add
ed that pride was an expensive article any
where. Certainly, if it is 50 costly an affair on
a prairie farm il is none the less costly III our
great Atlantic cities, which are full of the ruin
caused BY pride, Thousands are annually beg
CARED, and tens of thousands straitened in cir
cumstances by this same pride.
1t is pride that makes the father dress his
daughters beyond his means. Its pride that
induces the mother to do the kitchen work, that
Mary Ann may sit in the parlor and practise
music. Il is pride that leads families to live in
houses finer than they can afford, to give snowy
parties, to waste the surplus Of their income in
q summer excursion It is pride that has
French mirrors. French laees, French china,
French kuickkIackeries of every sort. tits
pride, in short, that is at the root of half the
extravaganza Of the age. Truly did the wise
man say, pride goeth before destruction -
Embarrassment and ruin are what pride costs.
I Two preachers were recently in the same
! pulpitin Georgia. While one was preaching,
| he happened to say, s.When Abraham built
the ark. /" The one behind him strove to cor
rect bis bluzlder by saying out loud, Abraham
warnt thar" But the speaker pushed on,
needless of the interruption, and only took oc
casion shortly to repeat, still more decidedly,
| Il say, when Abraham built the ark. ''And
| say" cried out the other, abraham warn't |
thar" The preacher was too hard to be beat
en- down Id this way, and addressing the peo- !
pie, exclaimed with great indignation, Il say /
Abraham was thar or thar abouts.'
Professor Hannibals last lecture is upon
electricity As usual be begins at the be-
ginning. He says-sDe fuss question ak
am, what am electricity ?'-and [ answer my
self, like dc EXC il de hills, No body knows
Some say dat electricity am de tightening of
human thought, and OATS jist about as clear
as dey deal it out to us, ignorant darkies.' But
conclusive; 'sposen you see silver dollar lay
face, whar somebody drop it, would you stand
and consider long before you pick it up? Your I
sourcastic smile answers, No Well, den,
what makes you grab it up and drop it in your :
pocket, as if it was bot, and makes you turn de .
fust corner you come to? Why, electricity.
# kno anything bout it,
y a gentlemen asked friend, in a knowing !
manner-"Ptay sir, did you ever see a cat a
fish9'
No, SIR was the response 'but have
seen rope walk Sc
Wonder if he ever saw horse fly? II II
'Bil did you ever go to sea?'' bj
Il guess / did. Last year, for instance, l of
vent to see redheaded gal; but l only call af
ID once" a
.Why SOP - 5n.- al; an
Cause her brother had an unpleasant habit -"
{ throwing bootjacks at people, or
bob, have you settled that affair with Mi.
impkins yeti" ! Y
'.Yes, he kicked me off the stoop last week, =,
nd since then he has stopped bothering me.'' an
Bob's ideas of 'bothering" are certainly We St
original
"Well, Jane, this is queer worldr' said sp
ra sposa to his wife, at breakfast the other r
orning GA nest of women philosophers -.
I'VE just spnlngup.
Indeed said Jane, land what do they pr;
,ld?''
The strangest thing in nature said he on
heir tongues!'' full
Exit Shocks, in hurry, pursued by the res
cam mug. co
A mlsdemeanor case was tried before the o 1,I
unity court Of Augusta, lately, which attract the
considerable attention. 1t was an indict-
ent for trespass Of sundry young gentlemen, ma
I serenade to a young married couple DIP
he jury brought in a verdict of only one cent Of,
images! h.
mir. SNOWFALL, | want to ask YOU one uues-
N dis ebenin." I
"Well, succeed dem
Suppose you go to de tabbern to get din
+, and don't hab muffin on the table but a big IT
ct, what would you say?" i
Il glib dat up afore you az it. What should and
u say" ian "a =
Ivy ny, unacr de circumstances % de case, Wa
should say dat beets all" A.
A modest young gentleman at a dinner par A..
put the following conundrun: T Tp:
''Why are most people who eat turkies like N"'
bies?'' -" Cor
No reply. The modest man blushed and San
'uld have backed out, but finally gave the y,
,son: NO o
because 'hev are iona OF lhe breast. oftE
Two middle aged ladies tainted; the remains No,
the young man were carried out by the coro- 7
t, and three married ladies clapped their its,
ndkerchiefs to their mouths in convulsion- ao "
thache. ners
The kissing stories, of which we have recent l.
given several seem to beget more. A gen SAM
man in Richmond, Va, writes to us that in -
beautiful village of Lexington, in the val
Of Virginia, young gent having devoted 80
nself to the special entertainment of com
~ of pretty girls for whole evening, de- 4
nded payment in kisses, when one of them ess
family replied: Certainly, sir, present your -.
>, viii
----o-~11~@---o1,L~,-- con-
The Great Red River Remedy! sty
TETHIFTGF be 0
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