Eaton Democrat. [volume] (Eaton, Ohio) 1843-1856, 1855-11-22
Misrelloncolls
THE PREACHER AND THE GAMBLER.
Putting the Saddle on the Wrong Horse.

Persons OF very antagoniStc portions of so.
ciely are frequently thrown into intimate as.
sociaiion with each other, as "DebriS Data"
very Justly observes, while travelling on The
steamers of The Southern and Western waters
Not long since a number Of gamblers and Two
or three clergymen happened 10 be passengers rs
on board the General Pike Steamer, bound on
trip from Cincinnati to New Orleans. The
company Of The cabin, from whatever cause,
extra morality or otherwise, did not seem in
clined 10 participate in the paStime of gaming
as is quite usual on majority of these river
cIan.
Several days accordingly passed and moi n
symptom Of card or gambling had been oh
served. At length a gambler-Seemingly an
unSophistlcated grrenhorr in the ways Of FASH
ioDable or polite society, although wild reck-
less, dare devil sort Of hati customer Of o
back woodsman, began 20 grow weary of the
tedum OF the passage, and become impa ient
to realize his travelling expenses, by viclm-
zing some Of the "verdanl" ones of the mot.
ley crowd.
Tapping one of The preachers alluded TO on
the back, in familiar sort Of q way, he thus
accosted him
az say, stranger, dull music here aboard
Suppose we take drink, and get little life
'mongst US :"
Excuse me, my friend, I never indulge in
tlat way"
"Oo.h! you don't, eh? Tee. .totsller,
p'rOps y Well lers have hand OF cards
lhen?"
'''There again Pm at fault. do not know
one card from another"
"By the ramping old sarpin, that's quare
But come my young hearty, and I'll Show you
all abou. 'em."
"I'd rather not, sir, il YOU please"
"Fre and birthstone Can't we get up
some devliry or mother I'm sick ont, po-
kin round this 'ere way. Wonder if there
uin't some cold hoss'' aboard that'll give US
''preochY" That sly old coon over there looks
like one on 'em gospel shop critters. S'pose
we ak him 10 gin US SaTmint Id like al.
mighty bad 10 hear parsOn snort, or listen 10
reg'lar Fourth O. July Grafton by some reg
lar ring-taiied roarer by the living jingo
wOuld.'
"That gentleman over there, who CLOCKS
like a sly coon," as you say, is Methodist
preacher, and think il quite likely he will
feel disposed to accommodate you with ser
mon. if you. d like 10 hear one"
"ln course would. You know him, don't
you Well, then, iist git him TO gin the
whole sugar billn' on us a blalheTgasterng
blowout, will yer III hold his hat and
take up the collection, dod rot me if DON'T"
"'ll speak with the clergyman, and Try and
prevail on him 10 give US short lecture for our
edifcation."
He accordingl, passed over 10 his friend OF
the white cTavat, who sat in the 10 dies sa
loon, conyeTsing with Sonie ladies', and stated
ihe wishes Of the gambler Returning how
ever, he remarked that The preacher was az
fecled with quinsy sore ih.oa, and felt un-
able to preach or lecture al that time.
"0h, h--ll, got the qunSy? The ID he
has Well, Pm bound TO have a trfle OF
sport somehow or 'nother-if don't I'll split
oil up into big chunks Of fence railing, will.
But soy, my young buckeye saping, you're
not bashfnl are you ! SpoSe you try and give
us smart sprinkng OF your own jabber jaw9
You look kind o. college lalned, anyhow, my
young hickory-n nut with the bark on
"My good friend, should attempt 10 preach
would endeavor TO make you feel little un,
easy in your boots, and might offend you, sir"
"You would, ehY No' as you knows on,
Ireckon. Pm not bulldog of that breed,
Dir. Devil bit on'l--no stree, old hoSs -
You are jist The chap for my money, you are !
Here, get up on this whisky barrel, and give
us big strsak Of he'll furious birthstone. Stir
up these old ironsides ; make reg'lar qua.
king among the dry bones put in the tommy.
hawk licks, and come the negro compmeeting
touch over 'em, will yerl This 'ere old rev.
olutionary cock has got psalm book, knows
for seed him readin' something about ''li
tie clear" in spell ago. can sing myself
like young jack.ass in q corncrib, II you'll
only give the lines ont. By goIly, Pm great
on sucking sugor eggs, anyhow. And mind
you, nabur, make an almighty screamin par,-
er. Blow hard, and strike out yer wind as
hard as yer can, and make 'em believe pack
OF hungry young prairie wolves are coming,
with big chunk o. thunder and lightning,
and tall billing Of tearing earthquake. BY
the gracious Moses on Mount 6inah, we'll
have rsmbunctious sport, shan't we, my Ju-
lius-C s-Cicero-Nspoleon Bonoparie- Cornelius
Grippa Joe Smith, the Mormon Robin Hood,
and al them ere fellows ehawed up into one
big tobacco quida"
Tie gsmblef assisted The preacher to arrange
hr the sermon, borrowed the hymn beck, and