New-York daily tribune. [volume] (New-York [N.Y.]) 1842-1866, 1855-07-31

volunteer few hints 10 aspiring authors touching tas
requisites Of the production.
Your hero and heorne are ready-msde 20 your
hands, they mast be an lrishman and a fanke, girl.
according to contract Take your Iishman, make
him ragged as can be decently done, piece Of
visible linen in the resr will please the galeresgirs
him club, let him enter with an Indian yell and
knock down every body-then let him get into gen.
temsns parlor and upset everything, then into the
csoekefy closet and break everything and then into
the kitchen and eat up everythipg-have him during
this last operation go the whole hog which elegant
expression YOU must pa, into the mouth Of your Yam.
kee girl somewhere in the plsy)-have bin get into
row with tie sery ants and knock down everybody
this will please the pitihen set him up in the middle
of the stage 10 tell unheardof lies Ia each Of the other
persons of the drama IN rotation, winking mean
while at the ladies' il the dress circe-this win pesse
the boxes. Get him drunk and hst him knock down
everybooy-get him sober and let him knock every
body 9own-give him dsnce and song with
whisky -botts accompaniment and have him ge, tpsy
and pucnacious between the verse;. Finale-mauy
your Yankee gaI to your Irishman and let him
knock everybody down-then get TIE curtain down as
soon as possible, which viii please everybody.
The rules for the management of your heroine are
lied or savage. and have her conduct herself on an
occasions as much like escaped lunatc as she
knows how. If you can introduce for your Milesisn
gentleman some Kind of wheelbarow hornppe, aud
have your American lady execute crutches dance,
sous and sing one two indecent songs all viii be
sure of double encore.
The other characters of your play are quite Toots-
ike" rot of the least consequence who do
sav anvtbnO .re not heard and N ose who dom are
on Is TO be knocked about by your Irshmsn and AFTER
having their and battered out of shape by
his on npotent shillash, have them pulled straight
again by the delcse digts of the "Yanke gal" BE
sure and keep of these perpetuay on the stage,
al let no one ese, by mistake say anything at
which the audience might laugh, else you may give
some other member Of the company shance to sp-
pear respectable, which would materially detract
from the brilancy of the Stars.
ANYTHING ike plot would of course be unnecessary
aud difficult TO manage II YOU can fad out before
hand exactly how many Supes your Hbernian de-
sres to knock down in the course of the piece, and
whether he wants fresh every time, il will mate
rally simplify your labors. Don't have yoar hero BY
his bunders break too much furniture destroy too
much china-be easy the crockery, and conciliate
the manager.
Bat seriously Messeurs Managers, for the honor OF
the PLAYERS at let's have more of this. Your in
fuence on the future fortunes Of the Drama is great
use it to prune from lis body these unhealthy pars
sites. Give us no more Irish monsrostes, OF
Yankee" barbarisms for be assured that the think
ing sensible part Of your audiences crave such
senseess exfravagances but that every person whose
taste is worth consulting or whose opinion is worth
mindng, viii be far better pleased with better things.