Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1855-02-15
VARIETY.


.Sae the CAPTURE Of shark which had been
~ orfue round the feet for some time
EAShas do you think we found in him ?
sHarnum's Life, says Wood, At Gnat.
brain.
why 80
Because the public swallowed il, and !
thought a shark might
WEEK says William, perhaps DO might,
Efut hG didn't Guess again.
Lots of ladies' bonnetd
sAnd whyf
because I have not seen bonnet on
iadys head for six months
THE audience reared, and The play went
on.-.Psst.
HrWhen Mr. L--was discharged from
the PASTORAL care or his church, an old lady,
who was very fond Of hiia, in attempting to
offericensolation, addressed him as follows
tAh. Mr. e., they may aaywhat they
viii. Abnt / think as always Ad l think
you good man rot equal to Christ, but
fully edual 10 Antiohrist
ns-lMy lave says Mrs. FopEie to her
J husband, icblige mo with five pound note
70 day, to purchase new dress
sShanH do any such thing, Agnes you
called mo bear yesterday.
Tor, love, that was nothing ] meant BY
ii chat you were fond Of hugglng
lyon litsle--YI have no 6yebut here's
aten'
rs-A friend Of ours recentlypurchased
al interest in township down east, on the
Recommendation thai the land was never
.kco..in a. ka afTncted by drought u
On visiting the locality, be found it'Was
covered by alarge pond Of water
Io returned BY the first train, and swears
eternal snmily 10 all land net affected by,
droughfs II
GEsal goods those down east lowlands y
n n1-sLia said Mrs Brown so the saddler,
iyou must ha, travelled great deal, Did
You ever see the Iron Mounlngs3
Yes, marin, said he, qnietly, and lived
! fer many years amongthe Brass Mounting
Dear me ! what's sight you mast ha gone
through with
n1s-sWhas IS me nRsusy st..- ~ EIl>
rirl9' asked clergyman !.
new Mexico was the reply.
me- no I meant what is thefusure con-
Aiti6n Of Young men aud womenP
WINS replied the girl, hesitatingly, !
suppcse they are % get married
F,-Mr. Whiteside, the barrister, cross
.xnrn;n;ng 4 witness, 10. Dublin, somewhat
,ndelv asked him'if he'h been before
puhlio court !.
Va, said no, Il was fined for an assault
Al barrister so annoyed me oy cross examl
nation, that / knocked him down when We
came out Of court
Mh-sPomp, was sd ever drunk 2
Ma I was intoxicated wild ardent spirits
.naa And dats ,nuft for dis darkey. Dc
T,ord hress you, Caesar, my head felt as # !
a. q clubhouse all do niggers 10 de worlC
appeared 10 Be- splitting wood in it.
sirs-Ceuncellor Rudd, Of tho Irish bar
80 eaually remarkable for his. love OF whis
,nd tha diney colsr of his lipe0i
NV dear Dick, said C6rfan'to him, en'
. 80 Won canI think how puzzled weare t
knpu where you buy all your dingJ shirts.
nr.O. na,' said juvenile to an elderly
dame, sthere goespa with yoke q steers Z
FHusk. nv child, said the mother, 1t !
yety vulgar 10 say 90, you should say, pal
8. NJ gentlemen COWS attached 70 = hooer
slsigha
Ts-Wa have friend, six footer, VII
"a lpromenadilg on public occasion wit
magnificent woman we are tho observe
al all Observers, said the genieman les
rsnlied the LADY, i've ara two brilliant stays
,Put the stars together responded the gel
MIaman. and What brilliant sun (sea) th'
they would naaker
s. ma,one Of Pixies nobfemen intends q
diving for patent fer . machine which
~. when wound up and set in motion, WI
ohase ! hog over ten acre lot, catch, yol
ana ring him, OF by q slight change OF gea
~ Il viii chop him into sausages, work 3
hrIstles into shoe brushes and manufactu
his tail into cork screws,
n-s-sNo Admittance The surest way
III 4 hrixats apartment, whether in aprir
Ing ofire, cotton factory, Or sausage sh'
With visitors, Is 70 place over the door p
sard, bearing the inscription, no adm ,n
sanee.a No person ever read that prom
zion over an entrance without instantly
~ attacked 81 an ungOvernabie desire
rash right in.
rrp~lAt length said az unfortunate N
~ hsa been ruined b. vsxatious lawsuits
10 1srvth / have feand happiness, for
-, csa Ia Neeessity--and that is the o.
shing know Of which has no Law
rrIs il no. reasonable % suppose I
Ei vken 8 Young lady offers to hem can't
hauakerehiefs fol rich bachelor, She me
8 sew il order that she mag reap
IA new style Of bonnet Is 70 be pro
IA among the spring fashions Il cons
H I cabbage leaf trimmed with radishes
Decidedly vcfnal-isn't il
rz-Any fool can ride quiet animal-
Il 4 when the Nag7of Life jibs and cuts
rough. that We End out who is the real ho
man
srs-Taere Is too much truth IN the
lerine wv here money i, there i the
II. snd where none is, there be is twice o.
IA bashful printer refused situa
IL 4 printing Office where females we're
ploys1. sayipg that be never set up vii
eitl - bis life.
Where thsre'is no hope, there cal
10 sndeavOr
NrThe man whose mind was unhin
~ 81 afflicted dispensatlon, has had the
6calty fspsised By ! blacksmith