Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1855-02-21
EVERY MAN his owN LAWYER.
An Amusing Sketch.

= II AMO3AAS ShcICn'
No one who may have any enjoyment
in rich humor will begrudge The space oc.
aupied by the report of the following trial.
We think that MIR. Arlington should leave
The toll gat" of the Mongasp, Fores!burg
and Port Jeryis Plank Road to take cale
Of itself, ahd turn his attention to law
lie is certainly something in law fight,
as well as in handling 'dornicks.' This
amusing case was tried at the recent term
of the Orange County Court, and we find
it reported in the Newburg Telegraph:
The people ugunst James Arlington.
District Attorney for People; Prisoner
in Person.
This was enc of the most amusing tri
ais ever witnessed by bench or jury in
this county. The prisoner was indicted
FOR an assault and battery upon man by
the name of Dodler. It seems that a
plank road had just been laid in the town
Of MinisiUk, running through the land of
said Dodder, and tina! Arlington is the
gatherer, and that the gate-house is
built upon or adjoining the lands of Dod-
der. The other facts appear in evdcnce.
The cause was duly opened by The Dis.
! d
noticed The defendant sitting within the
oar, with penc in hand, ready to take
down evidence, without any cono,A,E.
Have you NJ coansei, Mr.. Ailinaton?"
inquired The Judge.
''No sir''
There are plenty Of gcntlenon around
YOU who would be willing to assist you"
"Well, your Honor, have feed one
and engaged another, and they both turn
"p missing, and therefore have conclu-
ded 20 Try the case myself"
Very well, sir''
| The District Attorney, after stating the
case to the jury, called the complainant,
Mr.. Dodder, upon the stand, who testified
as fellows:
know the defendant; he is neighbor
of mine. l was driving his cows off my
land when he came out upon the road and
stoned me. He sent as many as a dozen
at me, and The last one struck me upon
the back Of the neck. 1t hurt me consid
rrably; no! very badly, however, as the
rim Of my hat hung down, and it and thc
coat collar prevented.
"Eou can examine him now, Mr.. Al
linylo0," said the District Attorney.
MI eyes were now !urned upon the de-
i"ndant. There he sat, busily engaged
in taking notes, little short, red headed
\ ankee, With his feet resting on the low
er round Of the chair, and his body bent
forward At an a%glr OF 45 degrees. At
that remark lie snapped his head back like
a blade to jack knife, and in q shrilI,
loud voice he commenced
"Have yOu been on coed terms with
the de(eudant-I mean me, Mr.. Dodder. -
Dodder hcsitated
"COme. Mr., Dodde7, have We been on
good terms %
II can't say" renled Dcdder
"WelI, recclect Mr.. Dcdde,, that You
must say
Say yes Or no" interposod his honor
eyes or no." responded the defendant
II cant say that We are on speaking
;erms," answered Dodder.
"WeIl. NJ. DoIder. you say that
struck you with stone. Will you please
stete to the jury whether it vas the frsl
stone that struck you ~
"No sir"
"D;d it not 90 fifteen feet to the risht?'
About that"
i EN cti, was i; the second ~
"No sir"
Did nos that go three feet over your
head %
Yes sir"
"Were you not running after, my COW
With stick sharpened At one end ? ana
lid YOU not knock her down and was i
no; because you would not stop that sen
the other stone'a you -
"Well sir, l must explain"
"None of your rigmaroIss here, Mr.
Dodder: No explanations. sir-yes or no
SIR
II can't answer"
no?"
cit wasn't stake, it was a stick
Eyes, two and half inches at the but
and twelve feet long"
: "NO sir, one inch across and taperiuy
7 to the end"
'You knocked the COW down. did'r
81 struck at her-can't say .truo