The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1855-04-26
CIVILITY.
The Social end tho Business Han.
"a kindly air-a gentlemanly bow.
And all the forms of sweet civiliiy."

erb, "fne words butter no parsnips,' . they
frequently, nay, almost invariably, have
kindly effect, and influence the mind as
we'll as the heart. Nevertheless, there
arc certain persons who 90 through the
world, as if determined never to utter a
civil phrase, never to do civil turn
They are naturally rough, harsh, pccvish,
and dissatisfied, and even when appealed
to in matters of business, they will indulge
in such a spirit and assume such an air.
as to make the intercourse cold, formal
and rcpulsiye \ sad mistake in every
point of view. All Of US are more or less
dependent upon cigility. 1t softcns and
Sweetens the intercourse between man and
man,-it breaks doBnbarriers and impc-
dimepts that would otherwise exist, it ap-
peals to the higher and more refined quail
tiles of nature, and it bcspeaks not only
intelligence and polish, but clearncss Of
head and goodness of heart. y man of
the world, one who has travelled, or en-
joyed the advantages of a through cduca-
ton, and especially gentleman, is rare
( ly uncivil To be so, is to be rude, dis
courteous, and insulting. Nothing indeed
is more agreeable, nothing more fascina-
ting, and nothing better calculated to Sc
cure an easy path in life or society, whcth
er in the social or the business world than
an uwavering civility. 1t touches many
a heart, it impresses many a mind, it re-
moves many an. obstacle, and while it is
calculated to crafty the thousands, it can
offend none.
! The man Of finished manners and ele-
CANT taste, of cultivated mind and gentle
manly instincs, is civil, not to the million
aire, the banker, and the merchant, but
to the mechanic and day-laborer and G.
ven the beggar who knocks at the door
He respects himself, and hence he res
poets the feelings of others. He looks
for kindness and goodwill at the hands
of his fellow-creatures and be manifests
these qualities himself. lie may have
his errors and infrmities, his prejudces
and his passions, his follies and his excite
ments. But, at all times and occasions,
his language and his manners arc civil, or
if having unWittingly committed an Of
fence against propriety, he is the first to
apologize, and make the Gnc72tlc hOn0ra-
JIe. A notable illustration of this fact
occurred short time since Two gentle
men, intimate friends, who had engaged
in an argument, gradually warmed, and
became excited, and in the heat of mo-
ment both forgot the lessons and practices
Of propriety by which their conduct is
generally governed. A harsh phrase was
uttered by one, and replied to with equal
severity by the other, until for brief
time, they seemed like enemies rather
( than friends, and were about to proceed
to blows. But both apparently recovered
themselves at the same instant immedi-
ately took back everything unkind that
had been uttered, apologized to each 9TH
er and to ali that were present, in a gen.
erous and gentlemanly strain, and thus
all was we'll again. The system of civil
ity in which they were educated, and to
which, for years, they have been accus-
toned, was found to be far more potent
than any tempory cbuliton of passion,
and thus its manifestation at a critical
moment, was every way commendable and
gratifying. The habit of incivility, if it
had been INDUCED and become fixed with
either of the individuals alluded to would
no doubt have led to the most unpleasant
consequences. It is bad enough to meet
with rough and frctful spirit in the ev-
cry day affairs of life but to have such
direct antagonist in an argument, and
tc
painful to one whose feelings are manly
and generous, and whose temper is kind
lv and courteous. A few days since, a
/ Western merchant visited Philadelphia,
for the purpose of securing a stock of We
ry valuable goods. He had travelled a
long distance, had suffered considerably
from illness and was rather rough in his
appearance but not so in his language
or manner. He stepped into one of
our leading houses, and saw one of the
principals, to whom he addressed few
common place questions connected with
business affairs generally. 1t so hap
pened that the other was engaged with
another customer, and was, to all appear.
ances, somewhat out of temper. Certain
it is, that his replies were abrupt, indie
corous and uDcvil; so much so, that the
Western merchant, who knew and appre-
ciated his position, felt annoyed and woun.
ded, and promptly withdrew. He imme-
diately crossed over the street to another
house in the same line. and before he left
made purchases to the extent of twenty
thousand dollars. The fact was after
wards discovered by the unoivil dealer,
that he had offended one of the most in
fuential customers to Philadelphia. But
we need not multiply illustrations. They
will be found hourly in almost every walk
Of life. The inexperienced and inflated
and the pampcred are, too often, among
the unciyil. 1t frequently occurs that
worthless adventurer is elevated by some
extraordinary turn of fortune, into post
of profit and power, when intoxicated by
his new position, he forgets all his ante
cedents, and violates all the propricties
and courtosies of life. He thus renders
himself at once an object of contempt and
derisioD, and although ho may play the
| desnot and tho boor for a short time, he is