Squatter sovereign., 1855-10-23

The Judge here became indignant. and
demanded if he had friend to become
bail for him. to which query the prisoner
hiccuped out:
IN never. never find q better frisnd
than old dog Tray" tft
Judge-Can't take him, hos not respon-
sibie.
Prsoner-sI give thee I'll. cam no
Juilge-I, won'tdc, sir; shall fine you
ten dollars.
q Prisoner-Thas's the way the money
goes "Pop goes the weasel -
Indignant ofiicer-Ifl pop you over the
head, presently.
Prisoner-W Whiskey IN the Jug.
Officer-Y QUILL be there, too, presently.
.Iudge-If you can't pay you mus. go 10
jail.
Prisouer-'Give me cot in the valley
I love-
Judge-very well. sir, III do it
Tomts, ten days.
Prisoner-.I dream't that dweIt in
marble halls
The Judge directed the officer to remove
him; bat he insisted on first singing "Mol-
ly put the kettle on" and afterward on re-
lating in appropriately melancholy verse.
the lamentable history of ''Vilhkins and
his Dinall.'' He progressed in this latter
history SO far as to inform the audience
that she was IAN unkimmon nice young
gal" when the officer unceremoniously
walked him off. He paused on the thresh-
hold and took of his hat. Every one sup
posed some eontrfte speech was to follow
this act Of penitence.; but il such was his
original intention he changed his mind,
and Mr.. G. Percy Delaney Blotb made
his exit from the court room with the re-
mark, at once appropriate, explanatory.
elegant, consistent. harmonious and intel
ligible, "Rlnctum too raj loorn lido
--~p~----
G6S We met a friend the other dav
who is troubled with slight impediment
in his speech, and finds it especially diff
cult to pronounce any word beginning with
the letter "r.'
"Well," said he, grasping our hand,
"they have had another wiot on the Brant.
ford woad''
"A wliat'" asked we.
"Why. wiot.''
""And pray. what is wiot GO
'Why, don't you know what wiot iss
lis wiot. wunpus.
''I don't understand you now
"Why," exclaimed he, 81 mean wiot
"a wumpus-a wow"
40, you mean they had riot, rum
ru,, row, on the Brantford road. Yes.
yes-we had heard OF that. Good bye.-
E8- The editsr OF the American Me.
chsnic has encountered trials unknown TO
ordinary men. Hearken unto his wall
ings -
lowing tc the facts, that otlr paper ma
ker disappointed us. the mails failing de-
prived Us of our exchanges. a Dutch pedIar
stole our scissors, the rats eat up orr nas,e
and the devils went to the circus, while the
editor was home tending babies, Our paper
is unavoidably delayed beyond the proper
period Of publication IS
zs5.#
"a A little girl at school read t!,us:-
"Tbe widow lived on small ..Iinbaey,'
left her By relative"
"What did you call tha. word?" said the
teacher; "the word is"lega.y." not "limb-
acy."
"But, Miss Johnson" !" said the little girl,
"Pa says must say limb, not leg"
~ A lad came in great haste into a
Drug store the oEher merning, and half cut
OF breath exclaimed s.=
Mother thent me down TO the hoiheca-
~ pop to get ihimble full Of pallegoric.
Bulbs as thick as the dickenth, and not
exthpected to live from one end to the
other" t...
g~ An old lady VINO did not know
whether her plantation was IN Virginia or
North Carolina. found, when the line was
drawn. that she was a resident of the
former. xs
WALL" said she, 81 an. glad don't
live in North Carolina. il was always such
sickly state
I Not long since two sailors passing
by a iailor's shop, observed tailor at work
IN his waiscoat patched with different col
ors of cloth, when one Of the tars cried out
TO The other
"Look ye, Jack. did you srer see so
many soris of cabbage grow on enc stump
before r
re- When is a wine merchant Ike =