New-York daily tribune. [volume] (New-York [N.Y.]) 1842-1866, 1855-08-07


Magistrate of the District was in state Of unusual
auieiude during the twenty four hours Immediately
preceding yesterday morning. There were compare
lively few instances Of drunkenness and rio;ing
and assault and battery cases, of which there Is
generally an overlooking abundance, were as scarce
"a frogs in January. Whether this remark able state
Of facts was attributable to some unbopedfOr improve
ment in the morals Of the community, or some une1-
pectod scarcity Of rum in that vicinity, q at present
fafbornless mystery Some few individuals however,
had lot tai On The moral epidemic had taken their
customary excess OF liquor and consequently de-
mended judicial attention.
MARY Brooks. although blessed with a oognomen
successive Of cold water and teetotaism proved false
10 the hopeful promise Of her name, and omitted the
AQUEOUS element entirely when she took in her evening
allowance or potabes. Mary has hitherto been re-
succnble, and kept her name out OF the papers ana
her pers0u out Of the Watch HOusebut on this mel
ancfoy occasion Mary forgot her responsibility,
Mary fel from grace May overlooked the possibility
Of official interference, Mary got very drunk and
sat down on the sidewalk, whence she refused 10
bu1re informing the officer in a low strain OF m.
elriaed music that She wouldn't 20 home till morn
." ing till daylight did appear The policeman d. Int
wait for daylight but took her under his protecting
care 10y mOonshine When the daylight finally dtd
aupear Mary was required TO pay ten dollars or retire
from public life for half score of days. Mary's bank
accOsnt exhibited a deficiency of specie. Mary re-
tired.
John Riddle of No. 2S3 MonrOe-st got some beeg a.
the Clinton GGrden some person 10 him unknown
pu; into said beer a gil Of brandy, which inebrated
ohn and he was found holding fast 70 tree-box IN
able from excessive fail cue other potent reason
TO continue his Journey. lie tried hard to beg off, but
the Judge was obdurate, and the individual OF the
Sphinx-lke appellatiOn ordered to disburse the
usual fire.
Peter Coyle coiled himself up en- the walk corner Of
Cannon and Rivington-ss., having first filed himself
full of beer. lie was uncoed, Strengthened ont taken
to the Station-House, tried found guilty, and sem
fenced.
Peter Mccain although taken out of the street as
yaerani. asserted that 10 has two hundred and fifty
dollars in the Chambers-st. Bank which he thought
be would lore ii he was sent up TO the leland. The
Judge however, having implicit confidence in the
sOlvency OF the Bank, thought that Peters money
would be forthcoming at the end of couple of months,
and accordingly sent him to ,he Isle o. Beauty for that
length Of time Peter left the Court devOuy praying
Tn in the interim between the present epoch and the
tmd set for his return, the Chambers-st. Bank may
keep it's gredit and may mt trust out his two hun lred
and fifty dollars into improper hands.
George Stonebreaker pitched into Pat Collins, aud
made severe ndentatiOns in his Uranium, beside CON-
shifting fearful ravages upon his cOuntenance. Pat.
objected 20 this kind Of stOne-breakng not consider
ing s fae proper subject for thu experiments of the
Infatuated rocksmasher and accordingly brought him
into Court. George gave bail 10 behave decently If
bis uncAristian name will let him.
Patrick Kelly-Was drunk and dsOrderly, but
Patrick was fortunate and eoi OFF with a reprimand.
Antony Lion, while III temporary state of inc
br,ty was attacked BY tnee Iish Indies upon whose
showed thai he was lamb, or a cow or jackass,
or in fact any thing but worthy owner Of his royal
name, for not only did he succumb 20 the conquering
Iettcoats, but lie arrested the ladies aforesaid and
brought them into Court They were however dis
charged
Jacob Brooks is the second rivulet whose meaoder-
ines are recorded in this mornings vertabe history;
Brooks being a srcamlet of literary run Of mind
aalr 70 Ia
enatched some odd volumes of ancient theological
works from a secondhand book-stail, with which he
inconmeny vanished round the corner; his perform
arce, however had not been without q witness;
star saw the hurried pathological Their, and imme-
diatClv gave chase tc0b ran fast but the officer had
the longest legs Jacob was, moreover slightly intox
ca'od aud 10 hton the ship began to cast away the
cargo, and dropped some OF the cabbagcd volumes
anon The nsestoIee; the NJ p. needed bot hut stead
y pursued he saw, the. poet says, books in the
running Brooks, sermons on stones, and gin in ev-
"erythiag 80 Jacob was finally oyerhaued and tue
Wholesale pla- iarism cost him his liberty
Here endcth the rst lesson, and the list Of ntoNica
ted worthless who let their buous propensities inter-
fore with their morals, and get them into trouble upon
questions of right and wrong, endeth with Jacob
Iroohs tie absconding tenant mentioned above.
A change comes o er the spirit OF our veracous
cords and we step up from the ridiculous 10 the sub
lmC-from plcbian petit larceny TO the spectacle
sentiment of jeslousythe highly aristocraiic passion
which makes the Curly-headed gentleman OF dark
COMPLEXION in the play rave around the stage like
n adman for hour and half, making faces at the
little boys in the pit, and sweating the venetian red off
bis face, and finally causes him 10 take advantage OF
his WIFE when she got her night dress on, and can
get up before the audience 10 run away, to stab her
with thing that looks like an oyster-lne, and then
finish himself of with a similar destructive weapon.
But Jealousy Is by no means confined 10 military
darkes who have white wives reaCherous friends aud
drunl en- ieuttnants but the present occasion II
found a rcsting place in a owlier east, and kicked
no considerable of muss between nan and his wife
who were both White-or would have been II their
faces had been washed.
Jack Maior-ueither naval nor military, notwith-
standing his namo-had long suspected his wife Ellen
of being too intimate terms with one Lambert Hop
kins who kept fish-sall IN the neighbOnng market
ambert had been an old beau of El'ens before the
marriage which made her Mrs.. Major but the happy
husband had hoped that all antenuphal preferences had
Died out since the publication Of the banns His eyes
had been gradually opened TO the nsdous advances OF
The man who dealt IN fishes he had on different occG
sious detected his wife IN the of privately enjoying
a soalhy crab. surrepiitious lobster or a guilty
shrimp; he had found ciandostine pOrges behind the
weshstand mysterious fishes under the bed, ineXpca
BILE smelts in the eoalcelar and had once seen with
his own ewes a furtve Goldfish IN the chimney; fried
cells, which were his particular abomnation were
much affected by his WIFE who seemed 20 possess uu-
c mmon facilities for procuring the snaky deicacy
his nosirs were perpeiuay offended with the fragrance
of fred Gels; fried ecs he could taste at dinner the
sayor remained in tie fIying-pan at morning, nor
was il absent from the potato kettle AZ night and he
averred that fond was his spouse Of this particular
dish tha; rather than 20 without it she would descend
into Ntsuvius with skillet and fry her ees in the
crater.
II was evident to Jack, from the constant
prevalence Of the products OF the watery ele-
men,s in Lis lardor economy, that some one
took especial pains TO crafty the piscatory PIE
diC cii0rs of his loving wife be suspected Lambert
Hopkins of presenting Der with these shy testimonials
Of his affection; he watched Lambert Hopkins, and
Lambert Hopkins proved to be the man; he saw
lambert come to his back door and give 70 his faith
less wife string OF ees which, in spite of their yer,
neular movements she concealed under her apron ana
made immediate preparations to fry he departed and