davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15
ABSURDITIES OF LIFE.

Not to go to bed when you are sleepy, be-
cause it is not certain hour.
To stand in water up to your knees fish.
ing for trout when you can buy them in a
clean, dry market
Men committing suicide to get rid Of a
short life, and its evils, which must necessa-
rily terminate in a few years and thus enter
ing upon one which is to last forever, and
the evils Of which they do not take the
wisest method Of avoiding.
People Of exquisite sensibiity, who can.
not bear to see an animal put to death, show.
ing the utmost attention 10 the variety and
abundance of their tables
To buy horse of near relation, and
believe every word he says in praise of the
animal he is desirous to dispose Of
The perpetual struggle of affection to
pass for an oddity.
To send yonr son to travel into foreign
countries. ignorant of the history, constitu:
ton, manners, and language Of his own.
To call man hospitable who indulges
in vanity by displaying his service to his rich
neighbor frequently, but was never known
to give dinner to any one really in want
of it.
That any man should despair Of success
in the most foolish undertaking, in world
overstocked with fools.
Such man is in debt to you in large
sum of money, and has no means in posses
sion or in prospect of paying you-that it
may be utterly impossible for him to earn it
by his industry, you immure him in prison.
TO be passionate in your family, and ex-
pect them to be placid.
To pronounce those the most pious who
never absent themselves from church.
TO take offence at the address or carriage
of any man with whose mind and conduct
we are unacquain:ed.
To laugh at the appearance or manners
Of foreigners, to whom we must appear
equally ridiculous.
To occupy the attention Of. large com.
pany by the recital of an occurrence inter.
esting to yourself alone.
Not to wear great coat when your joints
are aching with rheumatism lest we should
be thought delicate.
The VALUE OF PoL1TENEss.-Mr. Butler,
of Providence, Rhode Island, a millionai' e
who died some six years ago, was 80 obi.
ging that he re.opened his store one night
solely to supply little girl with spool Of
thread which she wanted The incident be.
came known, (Mr. Butler was young man
at the time,) and the trading public wisely
thought that this accommodating spirit, as
shown in this trifing affair, and in the gene;
raj conduct of his business, deserved good
run of custom, which they gave, and placed
him on the track of high prosperity. He sub
soribed the sum of $4,000 towards found
ing a hospital for the insane in Rhode Island
through the benevolent persuasion OF Miss
DIX.
GREAT men never affect anything. 1t is
your three cent folks that put on airs, swell
and act the pomp. The difference between
the: two is as great as between barrel o1
| v;rra0ar and sr,Esnpepa disnositon
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15
| M(iisteAalnans 8eaail>g
WHAT, CONSTITUTES RICHES,

"To be ricbS;e said Mr.. Marcy, our worthy
the Secretary Of State, requires only salts.
factory condition of the mind. One man
may be rich with hundred dollars, while
another in the possession of millions, may
think himself poor; and as the necessities
of life are enjoyed by each, it is evident the
man who is the;best satisfied with his posses.
sions, is the richer"
To illustrate this idea, Mr.. Marcy related
the following anecdote:
"While was Governor of the State of
New York." said he, was called upon
one morning athy Office by rough speci.
men of backao oodsman who stalked in and
commenced. conversation by ilquiring il
this was Mr.. Msrcvi"
replied thai that was my name.
"Bill Marcy r. said he. nodded assent.
"Used to live in Southport, didn't yes"
answered in.the affirmative, and began
to feel little Curious to know who my visi.
tor was, and what be was driving at.
THAT'S whafl told 'em," cried the back.
woodsman, bringing his hand down on his
thigh with tremendous force; 81 told 'em
you was the same old Bill Marcy who used
TO live in Southport, bu. they wouldn't be.
lieve it, and I promised the next time came
to Albany to come and see you and find ont
for sartin. Why don't you know me, Bill z"
didn't exacsEli like to ignore his acquain.
tauce altogetherf but for the life of me I
couldn't recollect ever having seen him be.
fore, and so / replied that he had a familiar
countenance, bus that l was not able to call
him by name. :s
"My name issJack Smith" answered the
backwoodsman, and we used to 60 to
school together: thirty years ago in the little
red school.house in old Southport. Well,
times has changed since then. and you have
become great man and got rich, suppose"
shook my head and was going to con.
tradict that impression, when he broke in:
"Oh, yes, yonare; / know you are rich;
no use denying Is You was Controller for
for long timS and the next we heard
Of you, you wSre Governor. You must
have made heap Of money, and | am glad
Of it, glad to ssayou getting along so smart.
You was alwaySa smart lad at school, and
| knew you wOH[ come to something.
+ friI4Hkett iiilz oEiItE goodTwIsnes sna
opinion, but told him that political life did
not pay so well as,he imagined. "l sup.
pose" said |, fortune has smiled upon you
since you left Southport"
"Oh, yes" said he, " hain't got nothing
to complain Of; must say I've got along
right smart You see, shortly after you left
Southport, our whole family moved up into
Vermont, and put right into the woods, and
reckon our family cut down more trees and
cleared more land than any other in the
whole State"
"And SO you have made good thing Of
it. How much do :You consider yourself
worth y" asked, feeling little curious to
know what he considered a fortune, as he
seemed to be so we'll satisfied with his.
"Well," he replied, "I don't know ex.
actly how much am worth, but think"
Strengthening himself up, if all my debts
were paid, should be worth three hundred
dollars clean cash." And he was rich; for
he was satisfied.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15
GBoiite 4oetrp*
THE ORIGINAL YANKEE DOODLE.

It may be some of our readers have never 81
he words of the original Yankee Doodle, sung
Dur forefathers in the times which tried mems sor
Is the collector on newspaper said. We are
believe that it will prove interesting even to the
Who may have seen it in days gone by and theref'
'opy them.
YANKEE DOODLE.
Father and went down to camp,
Along with Captain Goodin;
And thar we seen the boys and gals,
AS thick as hasty pudding.
Corn-stalk twist your hair,
Cart wheels surround you;
Fiery dragons carry you of,
And mortal pests pound you.
There was General Washington.
And all the men about him
And they were so darnation proud,
They couldn't do without him;
Corn.stalks, &c.
lie had feather in his hat,
That looked so mighty sprucy;
IfPd had money I'd made swop,
And got it for our Jerusha.
Corn-stalks, SO.
He had ribbon around his waist,
That was 80 gay and shiney;
I swar wanted it mighty bad
To take to my Jemima.
Corn.stalks, &c.
And there they had big round thing,
Its head was made of leather;
They beat on it with two little sticks,
And called the men together.
Corn-stalks, &c.
And there they had little stick,
With FIVE or six holes bored in It:
1t played line so darnation tlick,
It scared me for mint.
Corn-stalks, &c.
And there they had an iron gen,
That roared like bull-and louder,
And every time it fired off,
II took horn Of powder.
Corn-stalks, &c.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15
BUILDING on THE SAND.

BUILDING on THE SAND.
'Tis well to WOO, tits we'll TO wed,
For so the world has done
Since myrtles grew, and roses blew,
And morning brought the sun.
But haye care ye young and fair
Be sure ye pledge with truth,
Be certain that your love will wear
Beyond the days Of youth.
For if ye give not heart for heart,
AS well as hand for hand.
You'll find you've played the unwise part,
And built upon the sand"
'Tis well 10 save, tits well to have
A goodly store Of gold,
And hold enough of the shining staff,
For charity is cold.
But place not all your hopes and trust
In what the deep mine brings;
We cannot live on yellow dust,
OHHlIASu Will Puie' uihSS'
And he who piles up wealth alone.
Will often have ro.stand
Beside his Golfer chest, and own
'Tis built upon the sand"
'Tis good TO speak in kindly guise,
And soothe where'er We can;
Fair speech should bind the human mind,
And love link man to man.
But stay not at gentle words,
Let deeds with language dwell,
The one who pities starving birds,
Should scatter crumbs as well.
The mercy that is warm and true,
Must lend helping hand;
For those who talk, yet fail to do,
But "build upon the sand"
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

"Ir is said" that mixture of half an
ounce of pulverized salpetre and hslf pint
of sweet oil is certain cure for the infiam.
mratory rheumatism. The mixture must be
applied externally to the part affected, and
a gentleman, who has witnessed its applica.
ton in a. number of instances; says that it
will infallibly effecta~ cure, and that right
speedily 50, -.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

ANOTHER OF WAsH1NeToS's SLAVES DIS.
covERED.-A writer in the Rochester Amer.
ican says that former slave of General
Washington, named Richard Stanup, or
Stanhope, lives at Urbana, Ohio, at the good
old age of one hundred and eight years.
He has in his possession the original papers
giving him his freedom, in General Wash.
ington's own handwriting, for which he has
refused quite sum of money. He had
rather part with his farm than his papers.
He owns about one hundred acres some
ten miles north Of the village of Urbana,
bong ght with money given him by bis illus:
trous master. He is now. living with his
sixth wife, and to all appearance, enjoying
life as well as the youngest.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

me nIuuey. r1an subsequently CzrTIed me
remainder to his brother and asked him what
it would be best for him to do in relation to
it. His brother counselled the honest course,
but before Hall could adopt it he was arres.
ted and held to answer for larceny. Upon
the trial it was not shown that he had appro.
priated dollar Of the amount to his own
use, but as he had neglected to take the
proper steps.to find an owner, he was oblig-
ed to suffer the consequences.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15
LOUISVILLE, August 7.

Lou1sv1LLE, August 7.
The RroTs AT LoUIsv1LLE.-The riots,
in this city were attended with many horri;
bic scenes and great loss Of life-no less
than twenty persons were killed and twelve
houses burnt. or the killed, three were.
l....oriSano 1r1d tho bainuCo pa.-auv-4,isiI
man, as before stated, was hung, and parts.
of bodies were drawn from <sthe ruins Of
burut buildings. Intense exeitssneBt and
great evaporation continues topsevail.
The returns FROM the State continue to.
lie favorable to the Americans, who have.
undoubtedly elected all their candidates,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

A TOAST BY :PR1NTER.-At the Frank.
lin festival, recently held in Lowell, the fol.
lowing sentiment was proposed, and most
heartily responded to by the company:
The Printer--the. master of all tradea;,T57 y
He beats the farmer with his FAST Hoe, the
carpenter with his rule, and 'thsahnssor' IN
setting up tall columns he ,sufpasses the
Lawyer and Doctor in attending to his case,
and beats the parson'in the mahagement OF
the Devil. -. - :. ...,.,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

New .GovERSon OF KANsAs.--Mr, .Daw.
son, the new Governor of Kansas, was an
effective member of the last Congress, and
voted for the Nebraska. Kansas bill. He is
also known as strenuous advocate of the
policy of giving homesteads to actual set.
tiers, and introduced a bill for that purpose
which passed the House of Representatives,
but failed to obtain the sanction of the
Senate,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

IL the Bible were a weekly journal, how
many communications; would it receive, sign.
ed /" A constant reader2"
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

| found mercy at the hands of Christ, and |
am not ashamed to confess him before the
world"
To try him still farther, six shillings were
then offered him for the Bible. "No;" said
he; for it has been my support all the way
from London; hungry and weary, often
have sat down by the wayside to read my
Bible, and have found refreshment from j"
Thus did he experience the consolation Of
the Psalmist, when he said, "Thy comforts
have refreshed my soul" He was then
asked. "What will you do when you get to
Liverpool, should your uncle refuse to take
you inf" The reply may excite blush in
many Christians: "My Bible tells me-"
said he, when my father and mother for.
sake me, then thei Lord will take me up"
The man could 60 no father, for the tears.
choked his utterance, and they both wept
together. They had in their pockets tickets
as rewards for their good conduct, from the
school to which they belonged, and thankful.
ness and humility were visible in all their
department.
At night, these two orphans, bending their
knees at the side of the bed, committed
themselves to the care of their Heavenly
Father-to Him whose ears are open to
the prayers of the poor and destitute; and
to Him who has said, "Call upon me in the
day of trouble; will deliver thee, and thou
shalt glorify me-" The next morning these
refreshed little wanderers arose early, dress
ed themselves for their journey, and set out
for the town of Liverpool; and may He who
hears the ravens when they cry, hear and
answer their petitions, guide them through
time, and bless them in eternity Christian
Index.
SwEAR1Na.-.The following good anecdote
is told of Henry Ward Beecher, by n New
York correspondent of the Newburyport
Herald:
One of the warmest SAbbaths of last sum-
mer after the usual preliminary services, he
arose to announce the subject of his morn
iag's discourse; and looking around upon
the large congregation, passed his right hand
across his forehead and through his hair, and
in cool and off:hand manner made The re.
mark-"lT IS D------D HoT!'
The congregation was startled into wake.
fulness; aud many just composing themselves
for good nap-for some will nap in church
even under such preaching as Henry Ward
acknowledgement their eyes in blank as
tonishment. After brief pause, the eccen.
trio divine went on TO say:
"Such is the expression which | heard
used by no less than fifteen persons, calling
themselves gentlemen of respectabiity, in
walking from my residence to church this
morning, and the majority Of those fifteen
teen persons are now within the sound Of
my voice. Who are ye that has not heard
the divine command" Swear not at all 2"
And he went on to give them such lesson
on profanity that few but him can give, and
which none who heard him will soon forget.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

THE Springfield Republican adds to the
story of the man, who when told by his
landlord that he couldn't leave his house
until be paid his bill, replied, "Good; just
put that in writing, make regular agree.
ment of it; I'll stay with you as long L
livew the following 1T must have been
tne same ,1nalyluuai wnu, tvu puur 10 gsr
married, was yet too susceptible to let the
girls alone; and of whom is told this cir.
cumstance. He was riding with one of the
fair sex call summers day." and acciden.
tally--men's arms awkard things, are ever
in the way--droppcd an arm around her
waist. No objection was made for while,
and the arm gradually relieved the side Of
the carriage Of the pressure upon it. But OF
sudden, whether from a late, recognition
of the improperly of the thing, or the sight
Of another beau coming, never was clearly
evident, the lady started with volcanic ener.
gy, and with flashing eye, exclaimed: "Mr.
=, | can support myself!' CaPital!' was
the reply, "you are just the girl I've been
looking for these five years-will you marry
me?"
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

.a-, ---.-->S>p--e.-----s.
THERE is. an institution in Havana sahed
the Penela, q sort :of Hospital, where hus.
bands have the power to confne thsir nsugh.
ty wives. The power is frequently exereis.
ed, the husband, during the absence of BIS
wife, paying the expenses: 49,. =.
-. -. TomAro PREsERyss.-Tske The round
yellow. variety as. soon as ripe, scah and
peel; thenito seven pounds ofssopstoes add
seven poundeof white,sagara aand es:thena
stand over night. Take the lltomasoesr ous
Of the sugar and boil the syrup, nfetaoyfng
the scum. Put in the fonaiSess AMI bod
gently fifteen Or Or? tweeniy ssiants renoSe
the fruit again aBa boil mill the syrup thick.
ems. Onscooliug, put hs fruit into jaEs and
pour the syrup over i, and ada few slices
Of lemon to each jar and yoH will have
something to the taste Of the Q !! mes. Z,
fastidious.. -. - - -. -. 10, 80
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

Rev. E. H. CHM1N; says "the imperial
gambler Of France won his throne with dice
made from the bones Of the great Napoleon,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

"DocroR, that ere rats bane Of yourn is
fust rate," said Yankee to village apoth.
ecary. -
"Knowa itp' said the pleased vender of
drugs. ."Don't keep anything but first rate
doctors stuff"
"And DOCTOR" said the joker coolly, "I
want to buy another pound Of ye." =
"Another pound"
ayes, gin that pound bought the other
day to a pesky mouse, and it made him
dreadful sick, and l am sure another pound
would kill him !"
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

SINGULAR EFFECTS OF LGHrN1G-A
man named Williamson, with four Of his
children, was prostrated by lightning in,
Taylor county, Virginia, on Friday Last,
The children Immediately recovered, whilst,
the parent lay apparently dead. -, .
He was struck on the right shoulder.
The lightning ran down his arm to bis, ,fuf.
gers, and down his right side, divided near
the hip, one part running across the abdo..
men, and down both thighs and legs to the.
toes, scorching all the hair of his body,
and burning the skin and flesh from the.
shoulder TO the toes. The right sleeve Of
the shirt. and the right side Of the shirt be-
dY, was torn all into small pieces. The
pants, though newly lined, were badly tern
in divers places. He had on strong psir
Of coarse boots; the left boot was badly
torn, and the right one was torn to piecer,
even bursting the very soles and ,hesk
asunder, drawing the large pegs with which
they were made. After passing through the
boots on either side of where bis feet stood,
the lightning struck in four places in the
ground, leaving holes resembling those
punched with hand.spike. Yet, strange
to tell, Mr.. Williamson still lives, and it Is
thought, will. recover. Mr.. w. was thorough.
ly dreuched by. the heavy rain, which fell;
while he was lying on the ground; and it.
was no doubt to- this circumstance, and not
to the camphor, that he owed the preserva,
ton of his life. = a,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

GREAT men never affect anything. 1t is
your three cent folks that put on airs, swell
and act the pomp. The difference between
the: two is as great as between barrel Of
vinegar and anangeps disposition.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

SALE OF FREE NEeRoEs.-On Monday
last, the first day Of the. July term of Fat.
quier County Court, two negro Wogaen> ubo;
had been freed about year ago, were sold
in compliance with previous order Of court
for remaining in the Commonwealth goa.
trary to law. - .
These negroes were emaneipaied by Tho,
will Of John EdmoDds, deed, formerly cf
Culpeper county, with the condition that
they should 6ra serve Joseph Horner, Of
Warrenton, for the term Of 20 years.. After
gaining their freedom they went to the Dis.
triot of Columbia. Having,become tired1e
the sweets of such freedom as they there
found, they voluntarily returned and. :ssksit
to be sold as slaves fos the privilege Of re;
manning in the Commonwealth -viginin,
Free Press. - 81 r.,:s..;;s.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

Music FROM THE Iron HORSE A Wor.
cester paper says that an enterprising me.
chauic of that town has made an invention
by which steam whistles can be made to
discourse sweet music-thus, says the az.
thority from which we quote, making those
nuisances quite as ornamental as useful
What an Improvement that will be when it
comes into general use For instance, sup.
pose we are young married man, (reqqi1es
some imagination we admit and have to
leave the endearments of home for business
elsewhere. We get into the cars feeling
dreadfully if not worse-the bell gives the
parting tinkle, the wheels .rumbled slowly
out of the depot, and at that moment the
whistle strikes up "Oh, Susannah2 don t
Won cry for me !-sbouldn't we be touched,
and vet consoleds Then further along, an
ipnoramus, as ignoramuses will, is seen
Walking on the track, and Immediately,
i" Get out Of the way, Old Dan Tucker
starts him off as promptly as the hiss Of a
rattlesuake, but still with an agreeable ex'
hilarstion. But dog has to be run over
the thing. is .inevitable---but there is some
consolation in sold Dog Tray" played as
complimentary requiem. When not other.
wise employed; didactie strains might be
given, as, "Wake up Jake!" the fire wants
poking"--or'the night train might soliloquize,
ave won't go home till morning" And
one instance more--the young married man,
so ingeniously supposed above, having got
through bis business, is returning--as the
cars begin to slacken their pace, what would
be more touehingly appropriate than Home
again, home again" played with forty
horse power pathosa Wehave said enough
hurry up the musical engines!
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15

HoME:srckNEss.-Mostalgia-said, to be,
the pse.disposing cause Of the greater part
Of the sickness among the allied ssdaas M
the Crimea. =! ,l:;y;t'.; n
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1855-08-15
PRIT AZ AN ARTICLE OF FOOD.

Were we Of the South, to cultivate and
use fruit.more as standard article Of food
instead of eating it ndiscriminately between
meals, we should be all healthier people
We consume too much meat at our meals,
neglecting the fruits which beneficient
Providence has blessed US with. Were we
to breakfast on milk or coffee, with figs and
nutmeg or christina melons, dine on such
meats as the taste. or purse will permit, with
vegetables to match, and a dessert of water
melon grapes, apples, pears, peaches, &C.,
and sup on cup of aromatic tea, with
strawberries and cream, we might dispense
with the pastry cook, and the Doctor, provi.
ded we would eat no fruit between meals.
1t is not little astonishing, that with the
immense amount of fruit produced at the
South, it does not diminish the consumption
Of meat and bread. There is no doubt but
that the summers of the South would be the
healthiest portion ofthe year, were we only to
use fruit as a necessary article offood. When
we say fruit, we do not mean the trash that
stand for weeks on the trucksters stalls Of
the cities; but that which is picked fresh,
every morning, from our own vines and trees
Most of our fruits abound in sugar, which is
nourishing, cooling and healthy. whilst the
meats consumed, abound in oil, which is
heating, stimulating, and predisposing to fe.
.vers. Some of the healthiest people in the
world live in the tropical regions, whose
breakfast consist Of oranges, pine apples,
figs or bananas-dinner of MELONS and raj.
sins-supper of dried fruits with tea or coffee.
They have learned to adapt their food to the
climate and the wise provisions ofProvidence,
and when we do the same, we shall be a
healthier people.-Soil OF the South.