Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1854-06-07

BY QUIZ.
hn, bound the state of Matrimony!"

"Jon0S DounQ tne state OF Matrln0ny!'
"The State of matrimony is bounded on the
North by Solicitude, on the East by Double
trouble, on the South by Sore shins, and on the
West by Vexation." 'rr.o s,.,---& ..r .r r.
"What are its chief productsl'' %. g.. .
"Peevish babies, scolding wives, henpecked
husbands, smoked coffee, burnt ham and sour
pies" POI. sl. "a .a' a.r-..t. .r .. .....0...-.
"What is said of its climate!' , a..
sit has a vacant temperature than that oil state
in existence In that portion any other Of it called
healthy-the atmosphere laden with the sweets
of the flow ers Hymen. In some parts the inhab.
itants experience freezingly cold reception
when they expect most warmth and in some 9TH
er parts there to all the burning senation of the
torrid zone. Sometimes fellows house in the
state of matrimony gets too hot to hold him, and
strange to say he travels with all speed not to-
but from the poles. where cold is generally sup
posed to exist"
"Sarah, has John give correct outline of the
State of matrimony" .... ..a
Can't say sir; never was in that State
Bill Simpkns gave me an invitation the other
day to travel in it with him, and when / return
will answer the question"
swell, Sarah, as you seem to be ignorant in
Geography, will examine you in Grammer.-
Take the sentence, Marriage is civil contract.
Parse MARRIAGE"
"Marriage is noun, because it's name. And
though Shakespeare asks what's in name and
says that rose by any other name would smell
as sweet, yet marriage being noun, and there
fore name, shows that by the rule established
by the bard Of Abon has at least one exception
For marriage certainly is Of very great impor'
tunce, and being noun, and therefore name
Ergo there is something in name. ''... .
"Good!-NVell, what is the case of murriage!'
"Dont know sr."'
"Decline it and see."
"Don't feel at liberty to decline marriage after
having made Bill the promise have. Had rath-
er conjugate."
Jane, can you tell Sarah in what case mar
riage isl" - 'r' . .[
''Yes sir it is very common case, and l
wouldn care if it was u little commoner. And
| 'spose Sarah won't be married week before
it's in the printers case" .-t ....... .'.,
''Can you decline marriage!" -.... .. .
Jane bushes extremity and answers:
"Had rather not sir" ...
''Weli Sarah, what person is narriagc!"
':Second person, sir, because the person you
speak to is the one that is going to marry"
'Wlat number is marriage!" ..
"Piural number now sir, because Bill and are
two at the present time. When the person ties
knot, marriage will then be singular, because the
bible says they twain shall be one flesh"
"What gender is marriages." .s-.
Common gender because either male or fe-
male may get married. .rls. Oh. ..5..... ..
"Does marriage govern any thing or does it
agree with something" % -u ...... .-....5a
"Both, SIR. 1t governs mankind and woman
kind, and as to agreeing, it agrees with the world
and all the rest of mankind" a-. ...."..
nj "Give your rule" .... r..... ar... ....,
"My rule is that Bill shan't grumble if buy
tw silk dresses year, and he shan't have but one
teaspoontul of sugar to two cups of coffee" II.
'tPeter, parse civil" ....... ....... ..-.
"Civil, suppose, would generally be called an
adjective; but would call it an interjection to
express my surprise that it should be applied to
the noun contract in opposition with marriage.
Guess you'd think SO too If you were over to our
house to see how the old man larrupS the old lady
when he tight ."'s
SIN what degree is civil" .'H
"Cvil as applied to marriage in the above sem
tence is of all three degrees Of Comparison. For
marriage produces in one instance tho positive,
in another the comparative, in third the super.
latve!"
Positive, comparative and superlative whdt''
;'Why you see when man marries one thou
sand thuts in the positive degree Of luck; when
man marries ten thousand that's in the compar-
tive, and when he marries fifty-thousand or over
hats in the superlative."
t. "It seems TO me, Peter your ideas are far
fetched. But you are genius notwithstanding
you are little scattering. Take your seat and
recite the balance of your lesson tomorrow"
I it+ rE'5' ------------ - ----- -----.'' '' r.".
A REMARKABLE CHARAcTER.-New York pos
sesses many remarkable characters-remarkable
for very diverse reasons, but generally for their
eccentricity..t We have one in mind-a Madame
Del, who is now probably sixty years old. and
lives apparently in extreme destitution, in the
garret of the house she o,0ns. She pays taxes on
$i4,ooo gof real estate, and $l,loo of personal
property, and owns banking and railroad stock to
to the amount of some thing like $4,000. In
the street, her appearance is we'll calculated to
excite commisseration. Indeed some kind heart
ed Individual, a few days ago, benevolently offer
ed her one cent as gratuity, The insult, how
ever, was resented, as become her insulted honor.
Dimminltive in stature and decrepid, her head
is covered with hood, slouched and almost per.
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