Martinsburg gazette. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1833-1855, 1854-05-03
III! auO Eanlor.

hutHoHibufjAiy, dDH MAKO thH Vi NDab Jb-
are reading, because By aud b, shant pat
no confidence into you" Ike looked asio-
i.hea. ''lt's 80 il the paper here replied
he, giving emphasis 70 lis remark By liftiag
up tie lii Of The table and slamn,iug It dogu
as lie read the sentence sgain, They must
be ostficbes TO do IT, continued she "tlIat
caa digest board rails and window glass
wonder how long il would take them to ii
gest the new statue Of Frankliu that they're
sgoipg to bnilt. or the big one Of General
Washington in the state house. Or Eve IL
the city hall yard. don't tclicye they can
do IT, Unless the statues are mate Of
gingerbread or sugar said Ike. breaking is
upon Ter darkness with grin like Sunlight
through chink 10 the brosdside of barn,
..aud il them's en-. should like to be com
missionary too. Tho old lady rested bere
ike traveller on rock BY the wayside. and
felt assured that if the boy was right She
was at and took severe pull at the rappee
and Ike turned over to read about ar. Ba
ker's fancy checg lates - Boston Pgst
p<,- Hear bi,r, Isaac, said i'rs PaFt;sg-
ton, ia the gallery Of the House Of Represee.
tatigcs, as sIr. Wiggia was speakt,g upon
the new bill be had just introduced. look !
Sb CsItJ JsstNi aHt ittHttHbtI 10 ibI WIN 1
even he raises his haad, depend upon II there's /
something in II. How graceful lie is. and /
what beautiful attitudes he takes wonder
IT be ever bad to 90 down onto tho sea shore
and gil his mouth full Of paving stones ms
that man did that you was reading about the
other day. Oh it's rich privilege. Isaac
and a benefit for you to come here and listen
to such defamation. Profit by it. my dear
bay, and you IN time will be perfect ora.otio.
perhaps be preacher and marry folks
And have some wedding cake said Ike.
returning froni an earnest co temptation Of
THE Goldfish that hangs before the Speaker.
aud Frightening up as the rich plum cake and ;
its white frosting stole across bis vision, and i
be hastily threw ball Of paper under the 4
seat that had been destined for another di-
restion. The speaker raped on tho desk. !
aa1 a minute afterwards black bonnet was Q
seen going down the gallery stairs - Boston
Post.
gxy~'Where is your house !? asked tray.
eer in the depths Of Que Of tie old solemn
wildernesses' Of the Great West.
House II amt got no house
well, whore 90 you live?
Il live in the oods--sleep on the Great
Government Purchase, eat raw bear and wild :
turkey and drirk out OF the Mississippi !
And he added: !,
1T is getting too thick with folks about
here. You're the second man have seen Q
within the last mouth and hear there's a Il
whole family como in about fifty miles down Z
the river. I'm going to pu: out iuto the Ii
woods again"
BEay-A lady went into a grocery, lately, m
and asked for some self raising -four The
clerk, for the moment was green Irishman,
who, opening barrel showed her some Of The
ordinary superine That is not what want,
said the lady, with some pique. i want self
raising -four oh, said Pat with prompt. n
tudc, % divil bit will ye fnd fault with lis (
not rising the Who'll. bar ell went up this G
morning from niue to eleven dollars aud if 4
that don't suit, you are hard to plaze, intirc ?,
ly' The lady disappeared in huff.
rsSy@We remember being at conference
once in Yankee Land, when one OF !
the doaeons came around asking the people
ii they wanted salvation. Near me eat !.
butchers boy Of nineteen years old about as !
amenable to salvation, as lamb ia bis hand :
would have been to mercy. .
do you want salvation ? said the Deacon. n
looking into his brutal face il
No, darn you-l watt Sal Skinner, and a
tho sexton won't let me take her out I'LL meet Y
ing's over Then was the time We roared
ryr- Don't lay in that postus, dear said
Mrs. partington to her nephew, who was
stretched upon a sofa, with lis heels foot
or two higher than bis head Don't lay SO !
raise yourself up and put this pillow under !
you ! knew youug man once who had
suggestion OF the brain in consequence Of
laying so--his brains all run down iato his e
head aud with this admoaitiou she left him
to bis nap in the little back sitting room.
lsSg- Hear one Of our tripod brethren out
10 Ioosicrdom
oh for tongue to speak the doom
The wretch deserves, 80 boasily vile
As 10 sneak iato printers room.
When the EDITORS out, and steal the very
Best of the exchange papers off the file
gxD-At depot, few days ago, said the
Groton Mercury We noticed fellow seated
near the door OF ore of the ladies' apartments.
with few pounds Of hair surrounding bis
mouth, a little boy, passed the room with
bis parents, ON seeng the object exclaimed.
'Oh mother, just see that man 10Th cat
in his mouth
'Arrah now. Jamie said Que lrishman 10
anosher, as they stood gazing upon The foua-
TAIN on Boston Common, sure. what Is il
makes the wather squirt up SO. do you know Z?
'Aisy now, Pat, and don't be after expos.
ing yer ignorance aud want Of siusc, was the
reply; Everybody knows il goes BY .team ?
BGy--A clergyman lately illustrated the he
cessity of corporeal punishment for the cor
rection Of Juvenile depravity with the remark
that the child, when once started In course
Of evil conduct, was like locomotive on the
wrong track lit takes the sriteh to get uoG'
DsB~ \ college student, being examined in
Locke where he speaks of our relation TO the
Deity, was asked. what relations do we most