Muscatine journal. [volume] (Bloomington, Iowa) 1849-185?, 1854-03-31
Humorous Variety.

-"My lad, |" said lady to boy who was carry
ing al empty mailbag, care you mail boy? 2" "Yor
DON'T think Use a female boy, dus yer"
"A story is going the rounds of party of la
washed from their cheeks. A lady at our elbow
thinks the color Of some of the gentlemen's noses
would not be washed out by waterspout!
Old Downs says that they have are flies in Calfornis
large that they them to cook by. They set the
kettles on their hinder legs which bent for the
urpose like pothooks. Great country that.
-B,ing pursued by a constable, thief took
refuge on stump in swamp, and pulled up tho rail
after him on which he went out. The constable
made the following return: "Sightsble-eonversabl
mon est coms-at-able-in swanpum-up stumpum
-railo.'
-"Have you seen Bill this evening ?" asked q
wag of another. "Bill who p "Bill Nebraska-the
fellow wot got Douglas on bis back, trying to put
him in the White House." "Nop' "well, he's in
the Houss-let,s see him-thsy say he il a. black
thunder I"
A little fellow, from four to ave years old,
having perforated the knee Of his trowssrs in
tenssly pleased with Q patch his grand-mam had
applied. He would sit and case upon it in state Of
remarkable admiration; and in one Of these moods
"Grasd-m. must put on. on t'other knes, and tro
behind, like Eddy Smiths"
a young blood over in Hoosierdom, wishing to
get chance to tell of the fair what be thought
Of her. deunsd his best looks, and addressed her in this
W16: nave tno exquisite pleasure OF
ing the wheel Of conversation round the axeree OF
ysur undertaking few minutes this evening"
The young lady tainted.
-PalLosoPaY.-"First GLASS in natural philoso-
ply, stand up. Whats attraction"
Pleas e. 81. hn0wi the lock that sus-eysd gal
"Right Nov tell me what inertia ISL"
"Inertia, cir, ID desire to remain whore you
feeling pieos Of calico experiences when leaning
against canary -celorsd vest"
no1lt h nAvk al
-MAcaIHs POETRY Tho author Of the follow
ing lines ID said to be distant relative to Alexander
Smith, tho post. His name il probably John. He Is
in fair way TO become - celebrated n Alexander
Abigail Brown,
With bran new gown,
Went down to see her sister;
when Jonathan Lse,
A brisk as hsa,
Jumped right up and kissed her.
- Mrs. Matilda Mugs has put fresh single At
her shop door in one Of the western cities with this
NorIs.-I ar got sum nu articles for sail suoA ss
kracksrs, HANDLES kauphy kups sorsen and menny
other artik'ss tn numerous TO msnshun swl ceiling
cheep.
P.s.-Beens bort here bye the kwort or booshel.
o-NEeRo CoLLooUY.-"Hullow, BILL onsing. heard
tie nsws1" said Sam Jenkins, while seated on the
sunny side Of Catharins Market, day or two since.
"What news, THANH"
"Whew! Iss jnt learned that my old friend
Bill"
"Who from, Than Z"
al cant tell, xackly, BILL
"Why, Tham?"
"Neber ask her, Bill.''
The ST. Louis Herald says that the following
CURED At the Museum in that city :,-Conspieuous
among the sudiescs country born love swain and
his intended. Whenever the dialogue the stage
turned upon love or marriage, ths verdapt Ad mis-
borrowed series Of most energetic hugs upon his E.
quay s6.ctiouate mistress which attracted not oni
universal attention but mpeded the progress OF the
corps diplomatique, WIN at times we're unable to
tinue from the laughter excited by the
During the progress Of thi, very peasant hut
too public pastime, wag seated beside the brd, that
wss to Be, attached to her back placard that
her seat. LABELLED IN largo letters. Taken" The
bnnt Of laughter that ensued vas universal upon
which the s6sctonats psir dartsd down stairs amid
asstsnipg cheers