The Gonzales inquirer. [volume] (Gonzales, Tex.) 1853-current, 1854-04-01
A Landlord and his Crowd Sold.
AN OLD BUT Coop SronY.

Christopher Scriggins, the hero of our sio-
ry, ba genuine full blooded Yankee, aud no
mistake, and is famous for his Yankee
Tricks"
AS Chris, as he is generally called, was on
"tour"a few miles north Of this city, he
CHANGED to spy country tavern, and as the
dark mantles Of evening were being drawn
about the earth, an idea popped into his head,
suggesting the practicability of seeking u rest
ing place for the night. Without giving the
subject second thought, our hero found him.
sell, (or rather was found ) at the bar of the
aforesaid tavern, ordering the various luxuries
generally found at like places, and after coolly
devouring pretty considerable share Of the
same, concluded that he would abscond to the
second story and turn in for the night.
After having abscondcd, the Landlord and
his crowd" were very busy discussing the top
les of the day, and after while, accidentally
Of coursc,) the subject Of "Yankees" and
yankee Tricks" was brought up, and all
parties entered into the discussion with un.
common cagerness.
After deciding the very important question,
all hands were satisfied TINT the landlord was
right in his conjcctures, and rs n natural con-
sequence, all TUX n smile" at his expense,
after which the landlord informed them that
there was a "genuine Yankee" md if possible
he would have trick out of him before he
LEFT.
Accordingly, next morning the landlord md
company were ready to snap at the Yankee as
soon as he could make his appearance After
partaking Of "hasty plate Of soup" etc,
Christopher, with an air peculiar to his coun-
trymen, strollcd into tho bar.room, and was
about to pay his bill and depart, when tho
landlord, slapping him on the shoulder, thus
addressed him.
"If | should judge from appearance,
Should say you were Yankee; could or
would you oblige US with trick or twog"
" Have dun such things aforc, but dunno as
kud now tho"
"Oh do, do" exclaimed the anxious crowd,
"come, give us good trick, and we will set.
tie your bill for YOU"
This was a poser. Yankee consented to try
bis hand
Z" Landlord" says he, '"spose YOU have
some darncd good Ticker in these parts?"
Yes" says the landlord "got two casks of
the best wine that the country ever behcld. in
my cellar"
"You don't say SOP Wall come along all
You that want TO SEQ miricle performed" !"
and down they all went into the cellar, and
the casks were pointed out.
"Now," says Christopher, taking good
sized gimlet out of his vest pocket, :" kin
lasscs out of t'other."
"Do it, said tho crowd, and you can take
our heads for foot balls"
Thcreupon Yankee proceeded to bore hole
in one end OF the pipe, and requested the land
lord to cover it with his thumb, He did SO,
and soon a hole was bored in the other end
Christopher kept on "phiz" much resem.
bling that of an old deacon, during tho opera.
ton, and requested the landlord to reach over
and stop the other hole, while as he expressed
II, he could find something to put the darned
stuff into.
OF course the landlord complied sith the
request, while Yankee sloped
The landlords back began to ache-soon his
restrained patience began to break forth IN
curses on the whole Yankee nation, and as the
joke got around, the walls of the old cellar
rang with deafening roar. AT last by
promise to wet the whistle" Of the company,
and cancel Yankees bill, he was released from
his ,back.aching position, and has never since
wished to see "a trick OF tn" performed by
Yankee Doodle.