The Sumter banner. [volume] (Sumterville, S.C.) 1846-1855, 1854-02-01
Predictions fon. the Wear
1884.

SeD4e
This year will be famous for thou.
sand wonderful things. From Janu.
ary to December, the days will consist
Of twenty, four hours each, and there
will be such number of cclipses, that
manywisc people will he in the
dark. There will be fogs in Maine,
fires ut Constantinople, and lack
of brains in many fools head.
South America, this year, will not
extend beyond Cape Horn; and the
North Pole will be exactly in ninety
degrees of latitude. Those who lose
money will look sad, and those who
are in want Of cash when they bor-
row, Will want it more when they
come to pay.
Wisdom will cry aloud but few will
regard it. There will be long speech
es in Congress, but for all that, Lake
Superior will not be upset.
Quadrupeds, this year, will 60 upon
four legs, pretty generally; and cows
horns will be crooked. The fate of
lottery tickets will be dubious; but
whether there bea general European
war, or not, mortal wounds will be
apt to kill. and he that is sick with
old age, will have u disease harder to
cure than the mumps or chin.cough.
The celestial aspects indicate that
political parties will not agree for some
time to come; but whoever is Presi-
dent, water will run down hill and
ducks will waddlc as here ofore.
Cabbages, this year, will be rather
round than three-cornered, and carrots
will be decidedly red. Goals will be
as black as ever; cats will love fish, but
hate to wet their feet, and all on ac-
count of klinkcrtuc's comet.
The world, this year, will turn up
side down, but not in consequence of
the Governors inauguration. The crop
of hay will depend upon the wcath
or, but whether it rains or not, there
will be plenty of sand ut Cape Cod.
Whoever sells his house to buy
moonshine will hardly get his moneys
worth. Whoever runs to catch the
rainbow, will get out Of breath for his
pains. For all that, eastern lands may
be had for the buying.
Locomotives and auctioneer's ton
CUES will run fast. There will be NOR
tai war between cats and rats, rs well
Us between aldermen and roast tur-
keys. People will talk about TIC
end Of the world. but it is ten to one
that the solar system will not run a.
gainst the dog star between now and
next December.
Sca.serpcnts, this year will be
hard to catch, and non, but ~ conjuror
Will bc able TO get quart into pin1
pot. Those who have wooden legs
will suffer little when they freeze their
toes. Wigs arc expected to be fash
lonabie among the bald, but blind
folks will have some difficulty in sec
ing.
Divers steamboats, will blow up
this year. Apples will ripen abou,
October, sooner or later; but that is
all ono, provided we have cider enough.
FOXES will pay particular attention
to poultry; there Will be very few ull
birds ta'irn with cIa!, and Wild geese
VIII not lay tame r!sss.
Bat, most OF all. there vii! prevail
this Year horrible epidemic. w,lsc
,han ne cholera, small rox. or plague,
TO- wni,h there VIII bc 10 c,re. The
i'"!iaiS cali it poco dInuro; the Ger
mans, 'lir~ geld: the French Juuie Il ur
gent in this country, it goes under va
'ouH "lneiia'i"nS, but it is most com.
m""ly known by the Lathe of emp
y pockets. s.--IHe Cynon Plant.