Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1854-08-16
x U {G 0 r Q U S

GLORY & COLD WITTLEs.-London Po-
liccman: i hates a policeman's life, Sally
There amt no glory in it. l shall be off to
the Rooshin war;
Sally--'What, and leave meI
Il must, my dear, l hears my country's
voice a calm on me !
Sally What, an you'd give up all the
cold whites! =
All there you touched my feelings
No! second thoughts is best-guess l won't
90. The Rooshins is barbarians.'
A negro in Boston had a severe attack
Ct rheumatism, which finally settled in his
foot lie bathed it, and rubbed it and swath-
ed it, aud to no purpose. Finally, tearing
away the bandages, and shaking his fist at il,
exclaimed Ache away then old Teller, ache
away, l shant do muffin more for yer, dis
chile can stand it as long as you can, so ache
away
Jeoms, my son, keep away from the gals.
Ven you see one coming, dodge. Just such
a crittcr as that young 'un clenin' the door
on the other side Of the street, fooled your
daddy, Jenny. If it hadn't been for her,
you and your dad might have been in Cali
forny huntin' dimuns, my son.
My dear said an anxious father to his
bashful daughter, { | intend that you should
be married, but l do not intend that you
should throw yourself away on any of the
wild worthless boys Of the present day.
You must marry aman Of sober and mature
age-one who can charm you with wisdom
and good advice-rather than with person
al attractions. What do you think Of a fine
mature husband Of fifty 2
Tbe timid, meek, blue-eyed little daugh
tor looked into the mans face, with the
blightest possible touch of interest in her
voice, answered. i think two of twenty
five would be better, pa
When you are low spirited, and feel like
looking attho world through a smoked glass,
take to the country, instead Of the bottle.-
An hour With birds and mullen stalks, will
bring you around bottOr than q dollars
worth of brandy smashes.
Pickles says that when he sees a young
lady with a piece of court plaster on her
face, he takes it as a pretty good sign that
che wouldn't object to being courted in q
different way.
Young men will please take notice.
A Shity JUDGE.-A short time since
they had a queer case for n Circuit Judge
in the Western District Of Tennessee. LII
was a good lawyer, but cared nothing 70
appearance, and less for dress. The latte
was matter he knew nothing about, it be
rng left entirely TO Betty, his wife. Hi
Betty was absent from home, once when h
started around on the circuit, leaving tn
Judge to pack his clothes for the trip. II
did so, but instead Of finding his shirts,
very useful article inyented by mother Eve
he seized on a pile Of his wiEe's what-dC
you-callems, used for a like purpose.
learned brother who roomed with him, W;
much amused a few mornings afterward
at the queer appearance Of the Judge, notE
ing being in sight but his head, arms an
feet, his looks Of bewiherment, and his sot
voce reflections, which were, : Wonder Wh
on earth made Betty cat off my sleeves,
can't see 1t is probable he heard the re
son the next time he saw Betty, but not b
fore, as the Bar kept dark en- the matt
(to him) that round.
Don't strike, do be a clever man, on
said ragged little urchin, to a farmer W
had detected him stealing apples-'Po
aclever man once, for you never was.
How TO ENLIGHTEN nIM.-A bashful Yok
u~o paying hfo addresses TO u gay lOss of d
country, who had long despaired Of bringil
things to a crisis. Yokel called one da
when she was alone at home. After settlil
the merits Of the weather, Miss said, lookil
slyly into his face, / dreemed of you Ia
night
Did you? why, nowp
Yes, / dreamed you kissed met
Why, now! what did you dream yo
mother saidP
oh, I dreamed she tDasa't at homer
A light dawned on Yokel's intellect, q
directly something was heard to crack-p
haps YokePs whip and perhaps not; but
about a month more they were twain, dc.