Richmond enquirer. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1815-1867, 1854-09-05
IL r. T. IL 4 * \ 4.
THE CHARM OF MANNER; OR, EAS
GRACE, AND COURTESY.
TO move with easy. though with measured pace,
AMi shvw NO pn.. n: s.,ll.v hmt thc Gracr.'

TO move viii. easy: though with meo.uEed pace,
Am.i show pn:i -; st'!y hut the grace
".su gently blending courtesy and ART.
Thai w.-doms lips seem formed oi irI"nd-APs heart
There is nothing 81 well calculated 10 touch ana
win. graceful manner. Ii serves 10 embc,iSh ami
beautify the outward man. and in some degree Ia
adorn aud dignity, not only the social but the intcec
tua character. What polish Is To the diamond
ncr is to the individual. 1t hc.htens the value and
the charm. One of manner. always quiet. grace
full and sc!fpusscsScdalway bland. courteous and
caplivatirg cannot fail 10 secure friends and make
favorable impression. What indeed 10 mere delight
rul in yolih than a manner which AT once ackuOw
lodges respect for age indicates modesty and iscre
ton and NJ the time is free from III" aw kw"rd
and uncOurh air, which too often dciaccS ana dsis
gurrs A polished manner is essential 10 every truS
Gentleman He must not only understand and be-
able 10 govern himself but he must appreciate ina
feelings the circumstances ami me position ni o'htI
Ii is moreover, quite an easy thsk 10 Dc aia"!r III"
courteous when once the habit is permitted Ia grow,
and thus becomes identified with character. In the
course of an address that was recently delivered q"
the Anniversary 0t the State Norma! Schoo! ni AIDA
n.y. DR.. Iorao Potter coa;enl"d that manner Should
be leading feature i'll education. lie described X ~
the "outward expression ot the mind, not merely o.
its knowledge strens,h st reason" but c" the dcIcr
tn which il had been softcned ani htinanl2Cd 10y
culture, and of the pom; which II occupied III
the scale between DnrbnrIsm and perfect cIvit
ZatOn." And this IL cmpha'Ica!!y true. fi""
often are We carried away by the force ." first i'm
prcssious 4 sing glc look will sometime ng'r III the
soul for years. We may have heard oi an Individual
again and again, have become familiar WIZ! MS h.hF
and character by letter or through The representations
of others and have thus formed sort ut Friendship
nr attachment. and vet much al this may be dlsslpa
ted at single interview through the influence o! all
awkward, m0l-aD,0p0E, uneasy and ungrH"ct"I man
ncr. Who cannot point on. some young Gentleman
of his acquaintaucc, who is prpctunIy blUmdering
into difficulties dilcmmHS. and awkward prccan!Gns.
simply in consequence "t nh ahrup bIuHue, uiGou'h
and iErccant He can neither STAND al clsr
..nl- .l4tr Am lt-
Zoo dcspc tn. tact that his heart may be good, his
mind NAV br well informed am! hI> acquaintance
with the world may bc comparatively e1'viSNc' II
il either his misfortune or his fault to be- nwk"HTa W
manner and this will often prove sluin"hN- h'"ln
in ., and especially among the inIi daughters q,
Eve who liz such matters observing, ~ cfii-
cal ind so saircal. THESE latter qualities are W"
arc aware, unjust and mmgencrouS under the crcnh.
stances for OF tic nrbcst hearts tial ,NcI "''
! mated the human frame Ia be found within hwk
ward forms and ussOcia Jl with uigaluly hgur"s B't
ter too have the principle than the llannrr-octtei
the heart within than the form without. N"Hcr'heIes''
both are desirable, and hence We argue III favor OF
manner that combines grace, courtesy ana sell
posstssou-onc that not only WINS respect p"i VIA.
uavs it-one that expresses by it, every movement
proper appreciation for the tas;" the iceiin?S' anu
even the prciuccs and passlUs al others. "!"' 'u'
.,unuc that il properly cultivated can admire III"
co,rs tI,. rud, and the voleu-thc clustering, III"
insolent the reckless and the bold Ih" Inanncr Is
in some sense the mirror "i the mind u pC'uic az"
represents the thoughts and cm"!!ohs wNih. IL hG'
Gates not only the condition oi the intellect o" ''e
sp,r of courtesy and proprCty. 1t IL, say" Df' ROT
Ter ..tlrouyh the manner more than almost III any
other way, that continually impress ana influence
| fsyorabv or uufavurablv. those who arr about
us We cunuot always be engaged III cAlit--
| sive action. But even when we are shvHt, even
| when we are no, in action. there II something
III our mir and manner, which expresses wlh' Is e'"
waited ~ what is low, what Is hunnc ana hri"ilah
or wha. is cuarsc and harsh" Let III not he insun-
.t.ll rfsiT.lln
nr. of Il ruicIrss heart or the OTvrii0wliIgS q; JOY
Gus spirit Still there is a wide GIhrrcice between
the hostarnus and the frank between the affected ana
the GENIAL between the heart that Is cultivate" a"n
| cyuts because il Is rough. Anrciar'h moreover,
should be carefully guarded against 1t Is an error "i
little minds Ii il weakness rather than polish
and YET il is too often mistaken by It"H" VIE" !"'S
in il for the latter. The carm al manner c"HS'S III
its simplicity its nnd grace. II not "'!E De-
comes but it adorns. II not only bcnuthcs, but 1t
,ubdurs and wins. Take two persons "r example
who are equal i'll other rcspccts i.et them D.. "'
similar positions in lie, equal III fortune CpuHI IA
good lo"k, and like i'll disposition. Hut let them Ill
fer broadly and distinctly in manner, mud the contrast
will strike every bcloldcr. There are indeed many
| who cannot enter room whcr" lIhit dozen i'iI-
viduaS male and female. ARE assembled without
| displaying some nwkwa:tnc>-, p"rl"'TatiiG som.
blunder, or uttcring miSmcd rrmhrk IN" dat
ticuy with most of such IL, that they ranh" com
mand or control themselves. They bccoine "Ncitcd
and confused, aud this excitement "i me lnihn "a
tend, tn the manner and the tongue, at,l induces :h'n
very often 10 render themselves ridiculous one" i"
such dilemma they 20 from bad TO worse, and III an
effort TO escape, they Only get themselves the
more involved. How important then, the STUDY
ui manner And yet it il me-, Icctcd, almost unl"r-
| sally, while some of our teachers are anything
bur models in ;his respect. The idea of e'-" and
grace in personal dcp"rtH"nt seems never t" have
entered their minds. They forget tint the nr"' I'M
preston is often made through the cy" and henc" an
awkward boy may be- ruined before he has mn orpor-
tunity to dis !ay his mental qualities According I"
IN old aphorism. 'manncr makrtli the man. w"
are not disposed to 20 ~ far but II Is quite certain
nevrr,hcl.s tha; an easy graceful polished manner
| has often been the pioneer Ia position, power asl
for,une.-I PH0d,lphid Ldg"r.