Columbia gazette., 1854-03-04
MISCELLANY.
W AKING THE PIPER:
OR, HEADS IN THE WALL.

Sir Jonah Darlington, in his Person
al Sketches, gives the following account
of most amusing occurrence, which
took place at his brothers cottage, du-
ringa carousal of jolly Irishmen. It
particularly rich.
eve had intended to surprise my
brother; but had not calculated On the
scene was to witness. On driving to
the cottage-door | found it open, while
a dozen dogs, of different descriptions,
showed to receive US not in the most po-
lite manner. My servants whip, how
ever, soon sent them about their busi-
ness, and [ ventured in the parlor to sec
what cheer. 1t was about ten in the
morning: the room was strewed with
empty bottles-some broken-some in
terspcrsed with glasses, plates, dishes,
knives, spoons, Sc, all glorious confu-
sion. Here and there were heaps of
bones, relics Of the former days enter
tainment, which the dogs, seizing their
opportunity, had picked.-Three or
four of the Bacclanalians lay fast asleep
upon chairs-one or two others on the
floor, among whom piper lay on his
back, apparently dead, with table-cloth
spread over him, and surrounded by
four or five candles, burnt to the sock
cts; his chantcr and bags were laid sci
entifcally across his body, his nose made
ample amends for the silence of his
drone. Joe Kelley and Mr.. Peter
Alley we're fast asleep in their chairs,
close to the wall.
Had [ never viewed such scene be-
fore it would have terrified me; but it
was nothing more that the ordinary Gus
tom which we called aoakimg the 7iper,
when he had get too drunk to make any
more music.
No servant was to be seen, man or
woman. / went to the stables, wherein
| found three Or four more Of the goodly
company, who had just been able to
reach their horses, but we're seized by
Morpheus before they could mount them,
and SO lay in the hangers awaiting a
more favorable opportunity Returning
hence to the cottage, | found my broth
er also asleep on the only bed which it
then afforded. he had no occasion to put
on his clothes, since he had never taken
them off.
next walked Dan Tryon wood-ran-
ger of Lord Ashbrook, who had acted
as maitred' hotel in making the ar
rangements, and providing a horse load
of game to ell up the banquet. then
inspected the parlor, and insisted on
breakfast. Dan Tryon set to work: an
old woman was called in from an adioin-
ing cabin, the windows were opened the
room cleared, the floor swept, the relics
removed, and the fire lighted in the
kitchen. The piper was taken away
'sc.aeless but my brother would not suf-
fer either Joe o. Alley to he disturbed
till breakfast was ready. No time was
lost; and after very brief interval, we
had before US abundance of fine eggs
and milk fresh from the cow, with bran
dy, sugar, and nutmeg in plenty; large
LOAF, fresh butter, cold round of beef,
which had not been produced on the
previous day, red herrings, and bowl
dish of potatoes roasted on the turf ash
es; in addition to which, ale, whiskey,
and port, made up the refreshments.
All being duly in order, we at length
awakened Joe Kelley, and Peter Alley,
his neighbor: they had slept soundly,
though with no other pillow than the
wall; and my brother announced break
fast with an view halloa!
The twain Immediately started and
reared in unison with their host tremen-
dously! it was however, in very differ
ent tone from the view holloa, and per-
petuated much longer.
"come, boys" says French, giving
Joe pull-"come!," :
"Oh. muyder." says Joe, ~ cant.''