Democrat and sentinel. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1853-1866, 1854-07-13
JnigrGllurlfnu5.
III a rr i a q e.

II arri ag e.
Upon no subject is SO much good advice
given as upon that of matrimony, yet every
one knows how seldom such good advice is
listened to. 1t is not in all circumstances
that people can listen to reason, and it is very
certain that people in love seldom do listen to
| reason. It is also q truth, scarcely to be
/ questioned, that, with the circumstances of
falling in love, reason has almost nothing at
all to do. Taste, perhaps, has something to
do with It, and temperament good deal; but
discornment is for the most part at fault upon
such occasions, and Judgment is not called
upon to act This is very serious matter,
and must be admitted 70 be so when we come
to consider the very important engagements
to which mere personal attachments give rise.
Doctor johnson, while stating that is not dis
covered that life das anything more to be de-
sired than prudent and YirtuoUs marriage, OBJ
serves that there is nothing with so much Sc
duces reason from vigilance as the thought of
passing life with an amiable woman: and he
warns the gentleman whom he addresses that
love and marriage are very different states;
and that those who are to suffer often for the
sake of one another soon lose that Tenderness
of look and that benevolence of mind which
arose from the participation Of unnlingled
pleasure and Successive amusement.
The pleasantest part of mans life (says
Addison) is generally that which passed in
courtship, provided his passion be sincere, and
the party beloved be kind, with discretion.
Love, desire, hope, and all the pleasing emo
tons of the soule rise in the pursuit.
The hope, then, is more pleasing than the
possession of that which has been hoped for,
but that which is most curious in our consti-
tuition is, that this sort oC hope is ready to
spring up afresh in spite of known realities
which fight against it. When Johnson heard
of man who was going to marry a second
time he said it was the triumph Of hope over
experience. Seldom has commonplace mat
ter been resolved into happier abstraction
The continental tendency Of hope to tri-
umph over experience IN such cases is not
enough considerably those vehement reformers
of the institutions Of society who desire to ia
cilitatc the process of divorce, and, in short,
to enable people to separate when they find
they Go not live happily together, with as much
facility as they could unite, when they believ-
ed that union would insure heir happiness. If
any such facility were admitted, which it could
not be without setting aside altogether the re-
igious character of marriage, it would be found
that the hope of forming new ties more agree
able than the ould would ever be rising up,
in spite ofexperience. and that Inconsistency
would be promoted without promoting aappi-
ness. In this case, as in thousands ofothers,
the philosophy of bearing the ills we have,
rather than flying to others, that we know
not of, in practically the best for us; and the
greater liberty of divorce would turn out to be
only greater burthen.
To return to Addison. Seeing that court
ship is 50 pleasant, he wisely advices that it
should be Of long continuance. This is
point upon which doctors differ. Doctor Ad-
olson, however, expressly says, that those mar
riages generally abound most with love and
constancy that are preceded by a long court
ship The passion should strike roof, and
gather strength before marriage be grated
on it. a long course of hopes and expecta-
tons fixes the ideas in our minds, and habitua-
tes us to fondness of the person beloved
Wordsworth supplies charming illustration
of love Of this kind
|.Thcre was youth, whom l had loved 50 long,
That when I loved him not l cannot say:
Mid the green mountains many a thoughtless song
We two had sung like gladstone birds in May
When we began to tire of childish play,
We seemed still more and more TO prize each other,
We talked of marriage and our marriage day
And | in truth did love him as brother,
For never could hope to meet with such another"
The most serious point of all in welded
union Addison Just touches upon, and pursues
the point no further; feeling, perhaps, that it
was better to suggest it to reflective minds
than to dwell upon it in a familiar essay.
'sThere is nothing of so great Importance to
u.s." he says, 'sas the coed qualities of one to
whom we join ourselves for life; they do not
only make our present state agreeable, but Of
ten determine our happiness to all eternity.