Muscatine journal. [volume] (Bloomington, Iowa) 1849-185?, 1854-03-03

nunkOTUuS Variety.
Tho man who I" took walk % has brought 4,
back again.
Why Is lodging on the ground floor degra.
dation7 Because it ID a-tasement.
-Panch says that Adam had one great advantage
over all other married couples an advantage which
has been lost to US with Paradse-he had no ohu.in-
laU.
The same old lady, who, on moonshiny even
Tag, remarked that Z" it was as light as cork" in
describing hard swearing the other day. said 'tbo
man swore hard as a rock"
An Irishman. fresh from the Sod, and anxious
stead; itstung him, when Pat cried cut,
"Houly Moses how hot its little fut isl"
-"Ab, Doctaw, does the csoleraw awfect the
higher awdow?" asked an exquisite Of q celebrated
pbysi'ian in New Orleans. "No," replied the M. D
"but it's death on fools, and you'd better leave tho
city Immediately"
-"Cesar, what am become of dat darkey what
stole do tallow?" "He has been taken ND on an At.
hdaVit and carried up to de Sperm Court to have it
tried. "on an aft iavit, C@nr?" "Yes, seed de
handle myself, did,
a young lady, at breakfast, q. kcd gentleman
to hand her the hen fruit" pointing to plate of
eggs. The gentleman suggested Shanghai berries
a. q more fastidious term.
-HISrIya ON FAcrs-T Two Irishmen were in
prison--oae for stealing COW, the other watch.
Nike" said tina w-steslsr, one day, 60 what
o'clock is it?"
"och, Pat, haven my oatch handy-but I think
it's about milking time"
Pat felt could.
- wag was one day speaking of couple Of his
acqusintances who had gone West where newcomers
were usually afflicted with the sgue, and said he.
"Neither of these two men will be afflicted, "Wbv
nose' inquired bystander. "Bscause," was the re-
Ply "one OF them is too lazy to shake and the other
won t shake unless be gets paid for itl''
-QussrroN FOB LAwYERs.-snooks wants To
know If, when "distance lends eschantmsat to thu
VIEW, and the view refuses 70 return IT, there Is any
legal remedy Nhour own private opinion that in
such case, distance would have but poor sbov.
-BARBERous.-At recent strike of BARRIERS in
the cityof Portland, Of the speakers closed most
pathetic harangue with the following appropriate out
burst s+.....g8
g. Then fx our scale Of prices.
5s And let the tidings roll ~
- I'LL due return from labor
81 Shall spread from polk to pole.
g. Nor bAD.-In the N Y. Independent Va fad
the following from mother:-s.But did never ,.l,
you what time had with my little Joe,~ mNo
what was III" "Why, was showing him picturs
of the martys thrown to the lions and was tall,r.
very solsmnly to him, trying to make him feel vh.t
tsrribe thing 1t was. ma l. said he. all A. ono.
oh, ma! JUS look at that poor little line vav beb;nd
there, he won't get any!'"
-HoRs OF TIE UHGoDLY.-A reverend gentleman
being invited by . ysung friend to take . priy.,.
drink, agreed to dispose of lemonade. Bv soma mi.
take be drank his friends whisky punch, and The
young man informed him that he had taken the vron.
horn The minister smiled agreeably, and remarked
"Ah, my young friend, she horn Of the unrodlv hi,
be put down."
A Dntchman's Letter.
The following letter was written By Q German in
Lancaster county, Pa, whs visited Isws last .umm.,
10 an acquaintance in Linn county, in relation 70
'ome land. We publish It vu6atim ct Muatxm. !.
will DO seen that he adopts the original method Of d.
ng 1t ct tho place to which it is directed and Of ,o,
ns the name of the person to whom it is addressed:
isway Lima Co December tn II-1s53
NY Dear friend tax my opertunity to inform
'ou that am well at present times and I va, thsv
.oie time we'll since went from you and bops dsss
ne lines du ind you in the state Of iowsy in good
'elth and wish You at pesent times and you vour |
amaly and friend and tell you that An :, hon |
loM about little over two menth and tell You An
FELL pieast With my rase or travelling and hat ssan
nucn they last somer and com bon safe and thinE
gsiDg out to prepared ilinsys and ma be To xo,,
gan tell you this hat no liant yet In ioway but
mink git som liant In illinoys ioway one Of them
latss git som liant before year i, rcung il can
y hsith and is every sings rite with me. tell y"p
nat have liant in Io.sy but I hat NON now tell
% bat sean sum land that hat suts me good than
We the ortsr to R.gor for aadsr entsrI that ia.
re me and till he 60 fore andsr that land !
v ban huPer an very glat that was they're and
an your rish liant and in tho poor country ,ran
en- 1t was ander 30 be wrote to mo now bat no Ind
cir and so you must excuse me for INV noor
ing and spelling Give me q snssr. ps''
ksamstown post Office Lancaster Co Pc
little about market-wseds u 81 45 rye as co,,
Iugn