The Athens post. [volume] (Athens, Tenn.) 1848-1917, 1854-05-26
SOCIETY AND POLITICS AT WASH.
INGTON,

SOCIETY AND POLITICS AT WASH.
INGTON.
The New York Herald has SPICY CORES.
pondent ut Washington, writing under the
above caption. We copy one Of his articles
below:
WASHINGTON, D. c., April 81, 1854.
To the Editor of the Herald.
Consider the wheels of the federal govern.
ment as having stopped from this moment. |
am going, and tomorrow morning, at 6
o'clock, / shall be-gone. l have hardly u
moment left to write you letter announcing
nv departure. will narrate briefly the i'm
portant causes that have led me to take so
important step.
| had retired to bed about ten o'clock, and
had been asleep for nearly, if NJ. over, two
hours, when was aroused from lay slumbers
by startling rap at my door, rvas repeat
cd again and again. arose secured n
Colts pistol, which was preser d me some
time ago by Col. Dickerson, wha. he wished
to secure my mid in getting Cbis Patent bill
renewed by Congress. cOc~<S eace pistol,
and sung out, "Who Is there Z" -......
"Me," said one voice.
"Me," replied another voice.
"That's two mes; and if you don't tell your
names, will fire through the pannels Of the
door rs sure us my name is Sam Green"
"Murder! Hold on. Don't. It's ls-
Pierce and Forncy," said voice.
"It's u.s." said voice No. 2.
at once opened the door, let the parties
in, and fired up spermaceti with lucifer.-
~ hat tbn 10 ni,tp
"Oh! Sam," said the President, tive have
savcd-its no use trying any more" And
he took seat.
sits precisely and exactly So" said Forney.
"Tcll Sam what it is" he continued.
"Sam," said the President, "l'll come dow
as the coon said to Captain Scott. Don't fire
any more. Will you save me, Forney and
the countryw
"Yes, Sam. The President has spoke it
out. Are you willing to save US and our be.
loved country :" asked Forney.
"UpOn my word, Mr.. President, the hour is
midnight; this visit is unexpected; but wait
until get on my pants, and then can talk
to you freely. Shirt-tail conversations with
Presidents amt agreeable to my feelings"
"Certainly; put on the unmentiOnables,"
said the President.
"D0n't mention 'cm," said FOrney.
lighted another candle, dressed myself,
took u look ut my visitcrs, to see if they were
unusually wincy, and then observed, snow,
Mr.. President, let me know what can do
more for YOU"
"Onc would think you had done quite
enough, SAM" said tho President.
"Quitc enough" said Forney.
"l'll do anything for you, Mr. President"
was my dignied reply to what regarded as
Il slight Percy sarcasm.
"Sam, you must 90 away; you can save me
and the administration; Forncy and me are
perfectly agreed about it. want you to leave
on important business for the government,
and Forncy has consented that you shall go
on foreign mission"
"That's the talk" said FOrney.
'''ro France!" asked.
: '-Oh no, that plaos is kept in reserve for
Mr.. Bennett, whenever we can coax that old
crab, Marcy, into the nomination."
"Just so, Mr.. President" said Forney.
"Whcn do you want me to go!" | asked.
swell, Sam, VIC are in a fix. Nebraska is
all smashed and gone to the Old Scratch.-
The Black Warrior and Cuba matters have
fzzled, and We didn't get Cutting shot The
patent and railroad land scheme for plundcr
arc laid high on the shelf in Congress, and
our Gadsden treaty has completed our present
catalogue of miserable failures. The Cabinet
is disorganized, and only Forney and myself
are Il unit. Marcy is jealous of Gushing, and
Caleb despises Marcy; jeff Davis don't care u
damn for either nor me, and now, Sam, you
must 20 away to Mexico. You can tell Santa
Anna just how am situated; and when you
leave Mexico, you can 60 tOCuba, and have u
talk with Pezuea. Then you may come back
here; and meanwhile won't move peg until
you have looked up settlement in Mexico
and Cuba" observed the President, while tears
of anxiety were rolling down his cheek.
"The President has expressed my ideas us
well as could have done them myself" said
Forney, using his pocket handkerchief freely.
lcried, too-Icoudn't help ito see these
poor fellows in such n fix. What could do? ?
agreed to 60. "But about my instructions?'
said /.
"Oh, I'll write 'em--no Mr.. Ward this time,
Sam; honor bright" said the President.
"Honor bright. always" said the faithful
Forncy.
Sand when nm to start!
"To.night, If you can," said the President.
ssExactly, tonight" chimed in Forney.
"Oh, no, Mr.. President, must drop note
to Mr.. Bennett; can't leave without writing
a line"
swell, then, make it short" said the Presi.
dent.
"Very Short" said Forney.
81 am agreed" said |. "And when am to
finger tho outfit! :"
an arrange that, with my instructions, to.
morrow afternoon" said the President.
"To.mOrrow afternoon, as the President
says" said Forpcy.
'But there is another little job want you
10 do, at the same time," said the President.
ayes" said Forney. with deep sigh, and
his two hands to the very bottom
Of his pOcket-"anothe very important little
Job"
"What is that" said |, as l was brushing
up my hair.
.Did YOU ever hear Of the famous Morgan
and the anti. .Masons!" said the President.
"Yes," said Forney, ibid you ever hear of
Morgan, who was abducted, or disappeared
entirely, one fine evening! Thurlow Weed,
of New York, knows all about that business,
and how to shave off mans whlskers, too.
81 guess have heard of that coon" said l.
u had an uncle, old Lemuel Green, who knew
a man who kissed woman who lived at YAK
Orchard creek, and who made the lather to
shave Morgan"
.WelI, said the President, "when you 60
off to Mexico, ! want you to invite old Tom
Benton and John Wheeler, of New York, to
60 with you" >.
"Oh, yes. oh, yes!" said Forney, his knees
knocking together; 'you must invite Benton
and Wheeler to 60 with you, by all means
81 don't want you exactly to carry them oil
Us Morgan was" said the President.
uNot ax,ctlv. |. said Forney; shut as near rs