The south-western. [volume] (Shreveport, La.) 1852-1870, 1854-12-13
Meena Din1ity.

| Meena Dimity
Fashion is arbitrary, we all know What il
was that originally gave Sassafras street the
right to despise Pepperidge street. the oldes
iubabitant Of the village of Slimford could MOI
positively say. The courthouse and Jail were
in Sassafras street, but the orthodox church and
female seminary were in Pepperidge street
Two directors of the Slimford bank lived in
Sassafras street-two in Pepperidge street
The Diaper family lived in Sassafras street.
the Dimity family in Pepperidge street, and the
fathers Of the Diaper girls and the Dimity girls
were worth about the same money, and had
both made it in the lumber line. There was
no difference to speak of in their respective
modes ofliving-nonein in the family grave-stones
or church powers. Yet deny it who liked, the
Diapers were the arlstocracy of Slimford.
1t may be prejudice, but l am inclined to
think there is always something in nose. Il
am about to mention trihe, but trifes are the
beginning of most things, and would account
for the pride paramount of the Diapers, if it is
any way possible.) The most stylish of the
Miss apers-HarrietD Diaper-had nose like
his grace the duke of Wellington. Neither her
father nor mother had such a feature, but there
was foreign umbrella in the family, with ex-
actly the same shaped nose on the ivory handle.
Old Diaper had once kept a tavern, and he had
taken this umbrella from a stranger for nights
lodging. But that is neither here nor there
To the nose of Harriet Diaper, resistlessly and
instinctly, the Dimity girls had knocked under
at school. There was authority in it, for the
American eagle had such nose, and the duke
of Wellington had such nose, and when, to
these two warike instances, was added the nose
Of Harriet Diaper, the tri pod stood firm. Am
visionary in believing that the authority intro
duced into that village by foreigners umbrella
ESQ unaccountable is fate!) gave the dynasty to
the Diapers? ',0
Ihave mentioned but two families-one in
each of the two principal streets of Slimford
Having little story to tell, cannot afford to
distract my narrative with unnecessary 'asides,
and must not only omit all description of the
other Sassafrasers and Pepperidgers, but Imust
leave to your imagination several Miss Diapers
and several Miss Dimitys. Harriet Diaper and
Meena Dmity being the two exclusive objects
of my hero's Sunday and evening attention.
For eleven months in the year, the loves of
the ladies of Slimford were presided over by in
digenuous cupids. Brown Crash and the other
boys of the village had the Diapers and the
Dimitys for that respectable period to them
selves. The remaining month, when their sun
of favor was ecipsed, was during the falling of
the leaf, when tire drummers came up to dun.
The tonnsh clerks of the dry goods merchants
were too much for the provincials. Brown Crash
knocked under and sulked-owing, as he said,
to the melancholy depression accompanying
the fall of the deciduous vegetation-b but have
not yet introduced you to my hero.
Brswn Crash was the Slimford stage agent.
He was the son of retired watch maker, and
had been laughed at in his boyhood for what
they called his stairs.'' He loved, even as a
lad, to be at the tavern when the stage came in
illness he pulled off his cap, cas- soon after the
"whoa-hup'' as was necessary-and no sooner
and asked the ladies if they would "alight
and take dinner" with q seductive smile that
began, as the landlord said, ''to pay" Hence
his promotion. At sixteen, he was nominated
stage-agent and thence-forward was the most
conspicuous man in the villagc-for man. he
was, if speech and gait go for any thing.
But we must minister moment to the readers
inner sense, for we do not write altogether for
Slimford comprehension. Brown Crash had
something in his composition "above the vul-
gar" Ifmen's qualities were mixed like salads,
and were giving "recipe for Brown Crash
es," in Mrs. Glass style, should say his two
principal ingrediments were a dictionary and a
Shanghai cock-for his language was as ornate
as his style of ambulation was deliberate and
imposing. What Brown Crash would have been
born right honorable, 1leave with the smaller
Diapers and Dimitys) to the readers fancy. Ny
object is to show what be was, minus patrician
nurture and Raluation. Words, with Brown
Crash, were susceptible of being dirtied by use
He liked clean towel-he preferred an un-
used phrase. But here stopped his peculiarities
Below the epidermis he was like other men-
subject to like tastes and passions. And if he
expressed his loves and hates with grandilo-
quent imagery, they were the honest loves and
hates of weekday world, no finer nor flimser
for their bedecked plumage.
TO use his own phrase, Brown trequented
but two ladies in Slimford, Miss Harrier Diaper,
and Miss Meena Dimity. The first we have de-
scribed in describing her nose, for her remain
der was comparatively inconsiderable. The
latter was "a love-" and, of course, had nothing
PAL tlClildI dDOut iICI. kouC was q Ao1ii
ing till lighted. She was a mantle-notbing,
exceptas worn by the owner. She was mirror
blank and unconscious till something came to
be reflected She was any thing, loved-un-
loved. nothing And this Git is our opinion,
after half a life is the most delicious adorable
variety of woman that has yet been spared to
us from the museum of specimen angels. A
remark of Brown Crashs, by the way ,ofwhich
he may as we'll have the credit
Now Mr.. Crash had an ambitious weakness
for the best society, and he liked to appear in
innate with the Diapers Butin Meena Dlmity
there was secret charm, which made him wish
she was an ever be -handed-out lady stage
passenger. He could have given her hand,
and brought in her umbrella and bandbo1, all
day long. In his hours of pride, he thought
of the Dapers-in his hours of affection, of
Meena Dimity. But the Diapers looked down
upon the Dimitys, and to play his card delicate
Iy between Harriet and Meena took all the dl-
plomacy of Brown Crash. The unconscious
Meena would walk up Sassafras street, when
she had his arm, and the scornful Harriet would
be there, with her nose over the front gate, to