Muscatine journal. [volume] (Bloomington, Iowa) 1849-185?, 1854-04-15
Humorous Variety,

Mayor Saith, of Boston, in answer to a congratu
latory speech from some of his constituents few day
since, announced his intention to "make everybody
comfortable The Mayor is yet novice evidently
or he would hardly promise so much as it was
with a certain Yumbo, "down souf" lot of ''nigs'
camped down on the cabin floor, with their feet to
wards the fire. at the invitation OF the occupant who
wished to ''make everybody comfortable and who
himselfformed one of the group. Before long, Yum
1 DO partially raised himself and seeing number o.
heels very close to the e,nbers, eiaculated,-
| "Phew--ow! wot dat smell so? Somebody hec
u-nngm
! Receiving no answer, he again reposed, but soor
| springng up, again, said to his neighbor,
"You, Jake, dat you heel Somebody heel burn
| ing, shuah y
Jake denying the scorch a general investigation
followed, when Yumbo, in passing his hand over hi:
own heel peeled Off quite sheet of cracking" and
| exclaimed
Dress de Lord arter dis cherry mig look arter h,
sef l'is ole darkey amt a gwine TO cook he OWE
shins any more-make odder folks comfable, shuah.'
Clinton Conr0nf
hanging by lamp-post Look ERE didn't you
know that you'd no right to go by me that way 2"
'Why not, my friend ?? asked the person addressed,
who recognized in the tight 'un an old acquant
ance,
Because Qlc) it's agn the law
against what law ~
"Why, you used to know Bill Prown, when he was
(hc) highly different fellow to what he is now-and
"A Lady Kontributer' sends us zone of INV
points," with permission to publish it, Like most OF
ladies' poetry, it has something to do with 'ove and
the bhoys, though our Lady KoEtriblter' seems to
resd every near vegetable garden-at least her po-
i'm would indicate such residence
Only hear one strain from this votress Of love ard
succotash:
The corn is mp an CROWN fast,
My iuv to you will ever last:
The beans is yaller an Citing ripe
Du come TO see me every night.
The man who plays at once on the horn Of
fame and the horn of dilemma, got his first i,lea Of
music ON hearing haycock crow while he was tying
knot in cord OF wood.
Billions and rsalit-tant feyers ought ALWAYS
10 trouble people who forget to pay the printer
WHAT'S whisky bringing? ?" inq fred dealer in
that article. 80
Bringing men to the gallows,r was the reply.
The last instance of modesty Il that of a lady
who refused to wear watch in her bosom because it
had hands on it,
Why is thief called jail-bird Ans. Because
When is the soup likely to run out of the saucepan
When there is a leek in it.
- Sammy my son, how many weeks belong to
the year," "Forty-six, sir.n why, Sammy. how do
yous make that out ~ 'The other six are Ienf';-
Mother, put that boy to bed. He's getting too for
ard
a hbASoN FUR NoISf FRAY MA worthy phy 81
cian OF Baltimore, amember OF the society OF Friends
mas fayorite negro coachman. who happens to lie
Methodist. Mt only is .Samr Methodist but he i,
also as bright and shining high. in the Church as /,
possible for such piece of ebony to be- You know
l presume, how the blacks conduct their deyotions -
Well sam was in the habit of selecting his master.
Kitchen as the scene of the devotions which he led
ana thesa religious services were not conducted en-
tlrely on plan which Quaker would altogether an
prove. The doctor however is famous for his good
nature and he endared the boisterous piety of his
servant and his friends with wonderful equanimity
one hgh. however, they had been unusually power
ter gentle rsproof. So the meeting over, the zeal
Gus Gus coacliman was summoned before his MASTER
Sam, said the old gentleman, "why docs thee make
80 much noise in prayer Doesn't thee know thai
lhe Almighty in not lar off, but nigh unto thee
neither IS his car deaf, thatt cannot hear He can
ie'r thee rs well when thee whispers as when thee
oars. "Massa Do'tor," replied Sam, full of conf |
ence In his superior theological lore lyon isn't read
e ptuie wild no kind tention" .'How so, sam .
WY, you dont forgot pears to me, how it says dar
f@e.tf be thy nAme!n The Doctor gave Sam up In
spar for there was no answering that '.argumel.