The Empire County argus., 1854-12-09
DOesticks goes to see the Tragedian.

NEW YORK, SEVEN HUNDRED AND ONE, NARROW ST.
have always had passion for theatricals, and
was at one time of my varegated existence much
more intimately connected with the stage than at
present-and reaching the city, felt, of course
great desire to behold again the theatre, with all
its brilliant ascinations-he light, the music, the
varied scenery, comprising gardens, chambers, cot
tages, mountains "cloud-capped towers and gorge
Gus palaces" har-rooms, churches, huts and novels
to look again upon the glass jewels the tinseed
robes of mimic royalty, the pasteboard banquets,
and moasses wine, and all the glory, pride, pomp,
circumstance" and humbug, which | once knew
so WELL" "et quorum magma pars fui."
So with my trusty friends, Damphool and Bull
Dogge wended my way to the Metropolitan The
atre No. |, to see and hear the distinguished Mr..
Rantanrave Hellitisplit, the notorious American
tragedian, in his great original, unapproachable,
inconcevable, inexplcable incomprehensible part
of "What bore O, the last of the Vollypogs"
The house was full, and what spectacle for
modest young man! The front rows of the dress
circle being occupied almost exclusively by ladies
undressed in the latest fashion, appeared perfect
sea of bosom.
AS the modcsty of the third tier ladies did not
permit them to vie in this respect with their more
fashionable sisters, they had stad away, to enter
tain some audience not so refined, whose less cul-
waited taste would not require so complete an ex-
posure of the-ip fact, as Micawber would remark,
the maternal fount. There were several babies in
the crowd who, evidently hungry, kept up con-
slant wailing-poor things! really pitied them
but presume they were ignorant of the sin of
covetousness, and only wanted what they thought
they had right to; they had not yet learned, as
ace had, that, although they might see, they must
''touch not taste not handle not" 1t was bad
enough to starve them, but to tantalize them in
this manner was really barbaric.
And opera glasses, too were continually at them,
by people who, impelled by laudable curiosity,
were anxious to see all that could be seen. DAM
phool says that when you see woman with one of
these implements you may be sure she wants to be
looked at-and called my attention, to the confr-
matory fact that all the ladies with the finest busts
and the best developed forms, wore their dresses
the lowest in the neck, and sported the largest
opera glasses) (Bull Dogge asserts that they were
invented by the author of Staring made Easy
and "a Treatise on the use of the Globes')
By-and-bye, after a of tramping by the
intelligent audience, which seemed by its measured
regularity to intimate that they had learned the
motion in treadmll the bell jingled, and the men,
bers of the orchestra entered, one by one.
| After the audience had endured the prolonged
tuning of the Instruments conducted in masterly
manner by the leader of the band, the music got a
good ready for fair start, and at the word 'go''
they went could not critically analyze the up
roar, but it seemed to be composed of these ele-
ments a predominance of drum and cymbals-
sprinkling of trombone-a small quantity of oboe,
and great deal of fiddle. The tumult was direc-
ted by the leader, who waved his fiddle over his
head, jumped up and down upon his seat kicked
up his heels dsarranged his shirt collar threw his
arms widely about, stamped, made faces, and con-
Quoted himself as if he dancing frantic horn
pipe, for the qualification of the crazy whims of an
audience of Bedamites
At length the curtain went up two men came
on and said something, then two others came on
and did something-then the scene changed and
some others came on and listened to a shabby-look
ing general who seemed to be their-magnus Apollo"
and who certainly was very longwinded
Nothing decisive, however, came to pass until the
longexpected entrance of the great Hetisplit him
self eventuated | must confess that was awed
by the terrific yet serene majesty of his appear
ance. When | saw the tragic codfshy expression
of his eyes, was surprised when | observed the
hexibty of his capacious mouth, opening and shut
ting like a dying mudsucker, | was amazed
When my eye turned to his fingers which worked
and clutched, us if feeling for coppers in dark
closet was wonder-stricken--bu when my atten-
tion called to the magnitude of his legs was
fairly electrified with admiration, and could not
forbear asking Bull Dogge if those calves were
pabe of locomotion.