Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1854-04-08
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INDIANA GlRLs.-We find the follow
inc in an exchange, which proves thas
some of the girls in lloosierdom are as
sharp as there is any need for. Two
Young ladies' of Indianapolis, who, Blythe
by. belonging 10 the bon ton, were ont
riding in a buggy by themselves, and af-
ter driving through the various lashona-
BILE avenues, they concluded TO try the
plank road. Well, 10 the plank road they
went, aud while troting briskIy along.
they were suddenly arrested by 4 oII-gaie
keeper, who demanded his toll. "How
much is il p asked the girls. For a
man and q horse" he replied, "it is fifty
cents" "Well, then, GET out OF the way
for we are girls and mare! Get up,
Jenny and away they went, leaving The
man il mute astonishment.
A newspaper may be destroyed atnight.
1t NAV light a Segar; il may curl Iady'S
hair. Oh only think of that, girls. An
EDITORS thoughts completely, sweetly, eX-
'quislrvev wreathed in your rich resses,
and-yes nesting down with You in
your midnight sumbers, gently to guard
and peacefully keep watch over your
happy dreams.
A Young lady in Boston recently faint
ed on entering a room where stood Ou-
reau without drawers.
SPuNKY.-The girls Of Northampton
have been sending bachelor boquets ct
tansey and wormwood. He says he don't
care he had rather smell them than mat
rimony.
The modern way of asking for mar.
riage license, is to say Clerk, give me
an order for a woman
There is a man in Troy so mean that
he wishes his landlord to reduce the price
of board because he has had two teeth
extracted.
NEGRO CoLLoQUY.-'IIuIlow, Bill jon
sing, heard the news ? said Sam jenkins
while seated on the side sunny of Cath
arine Market, day or two since.
What news!' Than.
Whew lie jist larned that my old
friend Mss Zuri Kuoprumiee is gwlnc
to be divorced, Bill.
WHO from p
can't tell 'xactly Bill.
why 2 Than.
Neber ask her, Bill.
A Western paper says:-"When you
see a girl so lazy that she can't sweep
( her own seven-by-nine chamber, and then
goes TO a shindy and dances all nigh; with
the power of locomotive, make up your
mind that she is "got up" on bad prlncl-
| pies. The sooner you take your hat and
depart, the better. Such sor! Of calico
has been the ruin Of many man."
CHANCE OF GETTING MARRIED.-Fan-
ny Fern says she is ready to jump at the
first offer of marriage, and presents her
qualifications as follows:
81 have very black eyes and hair, and
am very petite. ! am as sensitive as the
'Mimosa,' spirited as an eagle. and
unalnable as chain lightning. Can make
pudding or write newspaper squib, cut
a caper, and crowd more happiness or
misery into len minutes than any Fanny
that was ever christened."
Fanny says the n. Y. Mirror, has been
twice married and only quite recently nm
married So if any enterprising bachelor
editor has a fancy for pressed Fern
Leaves" here's fine opening for him.
Mrs. Nicely bought warming pan the
other day. When she came home she
found Bridget, the servant girl, cooking
glddle cakes in il. This IS the same
young lady who was sent TO the dry good
store for bed comforter, and returned
with one of the clerks.
Is itno little singular that The letters
that spell DEBT, the initials Of Tie sen
lence Dun Every Body Twice : and the
letters which spell credit, are the Initials
ofthe sentence, Call Regularly Every
Day--l'Il Trust
'Mr. SchooImasier, do you know alge-
braH a A'gebra No, bul know his
father, Colonel Bray, and the girls, too
This IS cousin 10 the man who didn't
know mathematics, bat knew jim Maties
like book.
DONE stand there loaGng.' said pro-
fessor al Union to. three students, standing
where they shoulhnh. Were not. Loaf
mg. SAID Nal. there are only three Of US,
and it takes 'isGUen 10 make logf'
You are a coward, saida Iow London
er To poor couniryman, who had Felnsed
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