The Cedar County advertiser. [volume] (Tipton, Iowa) 1853-1856, 1854-04-29

DraWing.

Cabman with balky horse BE you
de mans as teaches to draw III six easy
lessons
Artist am, sir; what's tina, to your
Cabman-Vell, ish try dis tree weeks
more harder as nothing, for to make dis
animal draw, and he gets all avile no bet
ter as he vas. Vat pay you, Ell!
Nor IN THE PAssroRr.-Hall, in his Gland
Of the Forum and the Vatican,o states that
lady arrived az Nap es with an infant who had
been born on the voyage. The officisls would
not allow them to land, because 1.-The infant
was not In the passport"
INT The man who borro wed trouble has re-
turned il without any expression of thanks
The man who cracked joke,' has sent it to
be repaired
The young man who 'entsr tanned an idea
has sent in his bill.
reotype takenY"
"No, my child, guess it isn't worth while"
"Well, then, you may let me have tooth
pulled; never go anywhere
ca A boy who was sent to enquire how an
old lady named Wilkins was in health, said to
her servant, 'sMssus wants to know how old
Missus Wilkins is to-day?" to which he SER
want replied, She is just seventy four to-day"
G. In certain churchyard in the State os
New York, the following lines were written on
grave rail:
"Rsmember me as You pass by:
As you are now so once was II;
As am now, so you must be,
Therefore prepare to follow me-"
Underneath this inscription, some one wrote
in blue paint:
oTo follow you I'm not content,
Unless I kuc,y which vnn
e. Every one has admired parthenia's def
inition OF Love, to Ingomar:
sWhat Love is, if thou wouid'st be tau ht,
Thy heart must teach alone
Two souls with but single thought,
Two hearts that beat as ones
Some profane cynic, having no fear Of Cupid
before his eyes, has sent US the following vii
famous parody:
Love is nightmare with one foot:
Two children with one bun:
Two turnips with single RI OF
Two cabbage heads as one!
PRIcfoes They do have some smart girls
"a the Buckeye State. Here is one of them
a conductor on the road from Cincinnati to
Hamilton saw q nice little girl in the cars,
winch be supposed come under the rate OF half
price Tor children, ant returned her half the
amount rendered, with remark 70 this effect:
"naf fare, ha, ha. Why. do yon take me
foY q girl 7'i
very much.'
"w4, then, i'll do, am married; and that
amt ALL have got baby six IN onths old"
"Excuse me, madam; but il strikes me that,
Shs!evsr Imay be to day you are full up with
the time table, if not inst little ahead. I'll
take full fare, and no charge for the baby"
= Bancroft, in his eulogy on Gen Jack
son, says. sshe never died but, when Deith
eane, the old h"ro showed him aside, and esca-
ped into glory"
FALLAcY or AN On AXIOM To say, as
different as chalk is from cheese When we
cansider cheese is made of milk, and milk is
= ade OF chalk there is not such difference af-
ter ALL Boston Post.
- "How do you feel with such a shocking
looking coat on % said a young clerk, with
N ore presentions than brains, one morning. Il
with one eye half closed as L taxing aim al ms
victim-"f feel. young man, as if had a coat
n which had been paid fora luxury OF feel
ing which think you will never experience"
% Young ladies nowadays, when
they are preparing for a walk, ought not
g keep their lovers waiting as long as
they used to do. for now they have only
TO put their bonnets halt on.
Still LArEa-One of the managers
# the Poultry Show, having been at the
Fair all the day, Strengthened up on end
IN the morning as the day broke and Ia
King himself for Shanghai, began crow
ing. He did not discover his mistake
until friend in another bed knocked him
Oft his perch with boot.-Nats Reg.
%-A negro returning one night
from dancing frolic, when crossing the
river, lost both oars, and came near be-
ing swatnped. Determined TO do what
he had never done before. he dropped
down upon his knees and exclaimed,
"Oh, Massa, Lord If cher gwine 10
help old Ira, now am de time +"