Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1854-01-12

BE CAREFUL TO WHOM YOU TALK
Two young LADIES' were once singing a
duet in concer,.room. A stranger who
had heard better performances, turned 10
his neighbor, saying; docs no, the lady
in white sing wretchedly!"
Excuse me. Sir" replied he; 81
hardly feel at liberty 20 express my sen,
tmenis, being no. impartial in the case;
il is my sister,"
IL beg your pardon, sir" answered
the stranger in much confusion, / mean,
the lady in blue"
"You are perfectly right there" re
piled the neighbor; IL have often told
her SO myself; j, is my wife,
FAMILIAR ANSWER Eddy was up
for exhibition one afternoon, and was
being ca,echised before his admi.ing
friends. "Who was put into the iiery
furnace?" asked his father. "Shedlach,
Meshach and Abednego." "Who pul
them in!' Eddy's face frightened this
time. and with all the holiness Of one
who was sure he was right, he cried ou,
-"LiIle Johnny Green!"
t. When Pa, Hogan first arrived in
this country, he was told by some Yam.
kee, that many things in this country
were larger than in Ireland-,he rivers,
lakes. &c. Soon after Pat arrived at a
field where donkey was feeding. and
seeing The animal cock up pair of long
ears. Pat exclaimed TO his companion,
"Och. Teddy, m" boy, look! look! Och,
iabers what rabbit"
u Dean Swift. observing nothing on
the liable but rabbits. dish for which he
had grea, aversion, pronounced grace
in the following novel manner:
rabbits young and rabbits old:
Rabbits hot and rabbits cold;
Rabbits roast snd rabbits boiled;
Rabbits fried and rabbits broiled;
! Rabbits tender and rabbits tough;
God be prais d, we've rabbits enough!
A WrNEss. years ago a
witness was examined before a Judge,
in case of slander. who told him to -
peat the precise words. The witne5|
hesi,ated until he rlveted ahe attention oil
the whole court upon him; then fixing
his eyes earnestly on the judge bssan:--
MAY it please your honor, you lie and
steal, and get your living by stealingr
The face Of the Judge Redeemed and he
Immediately exclaimed, "Tura to the
jury sir!"
DIn certain village lived very
hones. farmer, who, having number o.
men hoeing the field. went to see how
his work went on. Finding one Of them
sitting still, he reproved him for idlenes.
The man answered II thirst for the
spirit "Grog. you mean suppose :
said the farmer; "but If the Bible ,eache.
you TO thirst for the spirit, j. says .ho'
every one that thirs,elh.'"
.Vonce, ven vas court mine Cater
inc, lrvas 60 on mine fed to- hoe mine
| potatoes corn. Veil den sees mine
Cairine coming der eoad, so / dihks
give her boo. 20 | climbs up tree. and
shust as vas going to boo her. l fall,
on der hemlock fence. and sticks a pune
kno. hole lE mine pansaloons, and Cat
arine vas laff and make me more shame
dan sheep mil one tam tief on his psei
-true rs pork. I"
n An ecisor some where in the west
has become so hollow from depending
on The printing business alone for bread
that he proposes 70 sell himself TO som,
gentleman. 70 be used as astoye-pipe.
Y Breaches there iAsn with soul .,
dead-who never 10 himself hath said-
will my county paper ,ake-bo,h 70
ny. ous, and family . snksf if escl
t1kara Il m - reQse1- neses ~
fkey he pxlpt1f. 9 a ----.-.--