The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1854-09-07

""Se' 0eSlHs Win IoIIy, ana ends Win
repentance.
Expectation takes up more Joy in trust
than irultlon can discharge.
Punctuality is the soul of business,
therefore punctuality cannot be inmate
rial.
The obstinate woman gets TO sea in q
band -.s
The patient woman roasts an OK with q
burning glass. . ,.
The vulgar woman is spider attempt
ing to spin silk.
The cautious woman writes her prom
ise on slate.
Modesty conciliates and subdues oppo-
si!ion courage defes and oyercomes it.
Acts oflove and kindness naturally con-
ciilate esteem.
Next TO being a great poet, is the pow
er Of understanding one. se-a
The envious woman kills herself in en-
dcayoring to lace tighter than her neigh
bors.
Cato said che best way to keep good
acts in the memory is to refresh them with
new
Why should money not be called blunt?
Because man can cut dash with it.
Why is pretty young widow like corn
in scarce time? Because she ought to
be husbanded.
When a wife kisses her husband, and
looks unutterable affection at hin, she 10
in want Of twenty spot
A French author says when I lost my
wife every family in town offered me an
other; but when l lost my horse, no one
offered to make it good
By taking revenge, man is but even
with his enemy bat in passing it over he
is superior.
We often forgive those that have lnjuT.
ed US, but we can never pardon those that
we have injured.
The mother who saw another baby
pretlier than her own has been sent to the
lunatic Asylum. ... s
Don't despair. Ifyou slip down. just
get up. a stout heart is as sure to fnat-
ly weather the gale as pretty girl is to
bring down the man Of her choice.
We never read of United Irish Socie-
| ty, but we are led inyoluntarily to think Of
the famous legend of the Kilkenny cats.
| The best life-preserver in this world is
marriage certificate. One-half the
rheumatism in the markets. onl Y vice, as
suming the shape of canes and crutches.
The man with the scratched face thinks
there is another way Of deciding that
question.
He who learns and makes no use Of his
learning, is beast of burden with load
of books. $50.
A newspaper is the life-preserver that
rescues those who would otherwise sink
into oblivion.
Millions of blades of grass make a
meadow, and millions ofmillions of grains
of sand make mountain; the ocean is
made up of drops of water, and life OF
minutes. ...t "a
| A gawky looking, stage struck Hoosier
went to see some theatrical managers and
solicited an engagement. What roll do
you prefer, my friend p said the manager.
wal, 'Squar,' said the would-be western
Roscus, Il aint partial to rolls, no how
corn dodgers is my favorite.' r"
| An inquisitive priest having asked a
young female her name, while in the con-
fessional, she replied, with as much Wit as
modesty, Father, my name is not a SIM
Very low neck dresses are rarely asso-
ciated with high morals. Calico will
please make mem.
Well said his honor to negro who
had been hauled up for stealing. a pullet,
what have you to say for yourself?-
Muffin but dis, boss l was crazy as q
bedbug ven stole dat ar pullet, cos l
might have stole de big rooster, and 4 neb-
er done it, Dat shows 'clusively dat ]
was under 'leerim tremdis. M
Sir said one of two antagonists, with
great dignity to the other, during a dis.
pute which had not been confined TO
words, you have called me scoundrel
and liar, you have spit in my face, you
have struck me twice ; hope you will not
carry this any farther, for if you do you
will arouse the sleeping lion in my breast,
and cannot tell what may be the conss-