The Cadiz Democratic sentinel. [volume] (Cadiz, Ohio) 1854-1864, 1854-08-23
INITIATING OUTSIDER
BY JACK HUMPHREYS,

BY JACK HUMPHREYS.
All creation and the balance of mankind
were, early one morning aroused from the
dulness usually pervading the pious, prim,
and peaceable town of East Nutmeg, by the
cry of
"What is it all about?' "Rhen did they
Gomez" GLOW many are they?' "What do
they look like?" "Did you see 'em?" care
they human crtters?' "What are they
going to do?"
"Who?" "What?"
"The Known Nothingsp'
"kno@ -Nothing?" says native.
"Know-Nothin3."
"Well, I'd give pence to know ICON.
tlnued the native, what in sin is't all
about?"
80, you haven't seen em?'says Jolly,
round visaged, bright eyed Individual, who
with other strangers, and natives of East
Nutmeg, were gathered in knot about the
depot, discussing the topic which had in
single night came, saw, and took the town.
"Hav'nt seen them?"
"Seen who?" says the native.
"The Know Nothings."
"Know- -Nothings! Wal. l kinder callate
| hav, few"
go, you are one of EN-. eh?'
''Look here, squire, if yeou don't want
to be squattin crosslegged in yon heap o
sand, | cal'late you'd better not say my ed,
ecatlon has been neglected in any sich
way"
"Not at all, my dear sir, only predicted
that you We're a--that is, hang it mean
do you know what's out?'
"Yees; I'll tell you what's out, squire,
Good; what is itp'
ga wilt agin Josh Pruden for breakin,
the Sabbath all tew flinders, playin' keards
in Deacon Dink e's barn.
"PshawP' said the jolly man, "I don't
mean that sort of work, l suppose you are
like the rest of these Know NotLings, too sly,
eh--to be caught 90
esquire, do you chaw?"
"Yes,' said the jolly looking man.
"Hand us yeour tobacco then"
Yes, | DON'T chaw."
"Git eout!' gettin' kinder sharp set too,
l catlate. Now lok a. here. squire, l gin
tew expect yeour from New York;"
"l lexpect you're correct in your remarks" !"
"Wall, knew yeou was; can tell yeour
ellers mile off; eyes, can by kingdom.
Now, l caP.ate there's somethin' goin' on,
that's fact-all fredust raow Areound this
yer taown, this mornin', beout somethin
feller ever hearn'
"Ah, that's what was coming at. Now
they say you've got up new invention--a
new-fangled society, or new order, party,
or sect, or something that's bound to get
Christendom in an uproar; how is it?''
"Eh, yes; when they goin' to begin it,
squlre?"
80, you git out, sly dog, air,t you one Of
emp
"What! them fellows that's goin' to raise
sin, and break things?"
al don't know; | only ask you," contin-
ued the squire, 81 only ask for information
you see
"Wall, naow, look a'here, feller never
made much by dod roLted ignorance in this
land of universal liberty and gineral edica-
ton; and feller hates to come right daown
and confess he don't know nothin," that's
fact; but, square, We got to acknowledge
the corn, a and it's no use talkin," but
darn my buttons to apple sass, ef wunt,
as poor fellow as be, gin jist ten shilings
and upwards to know what's kinder busted
lraound hers"
"Would you?"
"Wouldn't |? By golly, squire, guess
yeour the critter can jist tell all about it,"
"I'm Just the man that cam
| tpnu 1yanu haI Gr.,n l,pr.Ir.,o
let's hear all about it?'
"His-s-h,' said the humorous man,
"his-s-h! Ive been sounding you"
"Yeou don't say so?" echoes the citizen
Of Nu meg.
eyes. SIR; we have to be cautious"
"Eh, yes" sbstractedly responds the
Nutmeger.
Cant sneak out to everybody"
$50"
i eyes, sir; now l know you're a good
egg"
| "Aiggs?"
Good egg--sound to the corer'
"Saoand? wouldn't wonder, never ailin'
butonce in my hull life; than Ihad the darn
dest scratchin' time yeou ever did see,
reckon. Ever had the itch, squire?"
Never, thank You.'
30, not at all, squire, you are quite wei.
come, as Uncle Nat said, when he shot the
Ingin."
"Well, sir, now III give you in whis
per, an idea what's up; and il you love your
country"
"Me?'
"rhe land Of the free, and the home Of
the braveP'
4 "Grea-a-t Fourth cf Julyl pitch in big
licks. square
''Our own dear NATIVE landt'
/ "That's the gingerl so i, squire" says
Nutmeg.
i "Well, sir, now you just follow me over
I'tn the hotell, 80; now take chair Here