Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1850-1854, 1854-06-02


'.l've been up long time, and renew
ed the fire twice, Mr.. Crosby" she re
marked. without looking up.
This was the 'Squire's fayourite saluta
ton when his wife happened to take al
} extra nap of five minutes.
The gentleman made no reply, for he
. understood what the remark meant with
out the aid of an interpreter. He pro-
ceeded to business with great alacrity
piling the books and papers upon chairs
arRl nearly spillng some oil by carrying
a lamp the wrong way, and, by allowing
the kettle to boil over, some five minutes
before he got ready to take it out, he
succeeded ingetting thecloth laid, though
in rather an awkward manner.
Il think should relish piece of beef
steak, Mr.. Crosby" remarked the lady in
the rocking-chair.
'Ah, then you shall have it," replied
the housekeepcr patronis:ngly, as
he busted himself with napkins, cups
saucers, plates, knives, forks, ect. He
tried to recollect how Mrs. Crosby ar
ranged them. but in spite of all his at
tempts, he could make no application to
that lady for advice; as she was apparent
ly absorbed in Der reading.
Adjoining to the kitchen, the squire
attended to the making of delicious cup
OF coffee" and had long struggle OF
beefsteak, which refused to broil 40 his
Satlsfaction.--When returning to the
dining room, after long absence, looking
heated and impatient, Mrs. Crosby re-
| l-,1 har kssa y hot hg
had been absent long enough to make a
bcefSteak."
This observation the squire remember
ed to have heard before, but did not make
it apparent. At length the coffee and
meat were brought in, and all things were
pronounced ready by the officiating mas
ter of ceremonies.
| Mrs. Crosby seated herself and began
to carve the squire took his place at the
head of the table, and proceeded to pour
out the coffee.
THE bread, Mr.. Crosby" suggested
the lady.
Bless me, forgot it y he exclaimed,
dropping the cotiee-pot, and jumping up
81 hastily that he came very near over
turning the table.
The bread was soon procured, cut in
slices varying in thickness from wafer
to junk Oh four inches.
"The butter, Mr.. Crosby" suggested
his companion, when he was again fairly
seated
Il declare what poor memory |
have gotw And setting down the cup
which he had taken up for the second
time, he started for the missing article.
Placing it in triumph beside his wile's
plate, he renewed his attempts at coffee
pouring, and this time was successful ;
but it must be confessed that he eyed
the dark-looking beverage with some un-
certainty as he passed it across the table.
"Muddy coffee again, Mr.. Crosby !" alb
ruptly said the lady.
The squire hadn't word of reply.
VERY smoky beefsteak, my dear what
have youdone to it?" she continued, push
ing large piece of the obnoxious article
on one side of her plate. You must be
extremely careless, orsuch things couldn' t
happen so often rs they do y
What a woman this is to remember,
to be sure! Anybody would suppose
that she had kept diary of my unlucky
observations for "A year. Why, she has
them all at her tongues end :" thought
the individual addressed, though he didn't
see fit to make any immediate rcioinder.
The squire had but little appetite; his
wife remarked the fact, and hoped that
the simple exercise of getting breakfast
had not taken it away, as one person who
should be nameless, was i'll the habit of
asserting.
The gentleman WINGED and prepared
himself generous slice Of bread and but
ter, which he proceeded to dispose of as
though he had lacked food for weeks.
| When the morning meal was conclud-
ed, Mrs. Crosby donned her bonnet and
shawl, and remarking that she would send
home the dinner left the house. Our he
TO was now alone, and could carry on OPP
eratons without an eyewitness; which
he observed, was much more pleasant"
"Now we'll consult the list" he added
aloud, and have things 90 on in regular
order. Here goes a: Get breakfast, clear
table, wash dishes, put closets in order,
wipe down shelves, clean knives, cleanse
sink, rub silver, black stove, keep fire at
tend to door bell, sweep hall, brush stairs,
sweep parlour, dining-roOm and kitchen,
dust furniture, trim lamps, do chamber
work. wash meat for oven, clean vegcta-
bles, stew cranberries, make pudding, and
entertain visitors, if they happen to call. s"
Bless me. is that all ?" cried our house
keeper. IL call that making a great fuss
about little matter. 1t sounds larger
than it really is think III clear the
table. to begin with as that is put down
next"
! So at it he went, knocking things hith
err and thither, at great hazard OF their
establishment. As the idea didn't occur
to him that he should carry waiter full
of articles at one time, he made a great
many journeys between the dining
and Kitchen which necessarily consumed
considerable time. The dlsh-washing
proved rather. an awkward affair, and
didn't progress so rapidly as he could have
wished. lie couldn't wipe the cups han
Oily, the saucers seemed bungling, and
the plates would slip back into the wa
ter; but after breaking a cut-glass tnm-
bier. (Which he felt certain of matching
the next day knocking large piece out
of platter. (Which he resolved to paste
together while dinner was cooking) and
cracking pet dish of his wife's, while
setting up pile of plates, the matter was
brought to close. The knife cleaning
was another thing altogether; there
wouldn't be any danger Of breakages, and
he could put 'em through" quick. But
the black spots were deeper set than he
imagined, and required the exhibition of
more elbow grease" than he had any
idea of. He contended longest with the
carving-knife, which, in consequence Of
being awkwardly handled, inflicted deep