Plymouth banner. (Plymouth, Marshall County, Ind.) 1852-1855, 1854-03-23

Your name is Stubble worth, and you
are the bypocrite the Methodists have
sent here, eh2"
my name is Stubbleworth," he replied
meekly.
Didn't you know that my name was
Ned Forgeron, the blacksmith, what
whips every Methodist preacher tina,
goes through this gap?" was asked. with
ali audacious look; "and how dare you
come here?"
The preacher replied that he had heard
Forgeron's name. but presumed shat he
did not modest we'll bchav ed travellers.
You presume so? Xes. you are the
most presumptuous people. you Metho-
dists. lha:ever trod shoe-lea,her. anyhow.
Well. what will you do if don't whip
you this time, you beef headed disciple.
yon?"
Mr.. Stubbleworth protested his will
ingness to do anything reasonable 10
avoid such penance.
"Well, there's three things you have
to do. or I'll maui you into a Jelly. The
first is, you are 10 quit preaching: the
SC(Ouo Is, Ou iluSI NcdI HIS last VIII
and testament of Thomas Paine next to
your heart. read it every day. and believe
every word you read: and the third is,
you are 10 curse the Methodists in every
crowd you get into"
The preacher looked on during these
novel declarations without a line of his
face being moved. replied that the terms
were unreasonable, and he would not sub
nit to them.
well you have got a whaling to sub
nit to, then. I'll larrup you like blazes!
I'll tear you into doll rags, corner-ways,
Get down. you long-faccd hypocrits."
The preacher demonstrated, and Forge
ron walked up to his horse and threaten
ed TO tear him off if he did not dismount.
whereupon the worthy man made a virtue
of necessity. and dismounted.
Il have but one request TO make. nay
friend, that is. that you won't beat me
with this evercoat on. 1t was h present
from the ladies Of my last circuit, and |
do not wish to have it torn"
"Of with it. and that suddenly, you
basin-faced imp. you"
The Methodist preacher slowly drew
off his %overCoat, as the blacksmith con-
tiuued his TRADE Of abuse on himself and
his sect; and. as he Dire his right hand
from the sleeve. and threw the garment
behind him. he dealt Mr.. Forgeron a ire
mendous blow between his eyes, which
laid that person al full length on the
ground, with the testament Of Thomas
Paine beside him. The Rev. Mr.. Stub
blewsrth. with the tact of a connoiseur
in such matters. did not wait for his ad-
versary TO rise. but mounted him with
the quickness Of a cat, and bestowed
blows with a bouuteous hand, on the
stomach and face Of the blacksmith. CON
tlnuing his song where he had left off on
his arrival at the smithy-
Tongue cannot express the sweet com
fort and peace.
o. a soul in its earliest love-"
until Mr.. Forgeron. from having expert
enced first love-" or some other sensa-
tiOn equally new 20 him, responded lust
lily. "'nough! 'noughl take him off," But
fortunately, there was no one to perform
that kind Office. except the old roam. and
be munched bunch of grass. and looked
on as quietly as if his master was happy
at a camp meeting.
'.Now," said Mr.. Stubb,eworth, "ihere
are three things you must promise me be-
fore | let sou up"
"What are they7' asked Forgeron. ea
gerly.
"Tile first is that you will never modest
a Methodist preacher again"
Here Ned's pride rose and he hesitated;
and tine reverend gentleman, with his usu-
al benign smile OH his face, renewed hi,
blows and sung
"I rode on the sky, freely justified 4,
And the moon it was under my ieet."
This oriental language overcame the
blacksmith. Such bold figures. or some
thing else. caused him to sing out, well
I'll do it TIL do it,"
"You are getting on very WELL said
Mr.. Stubblewor,h; | think | can make n
decen, man Of you yet, and perhaps a
Ch4isliau."
Ned groaned.
"The second thing l require Of you is
to go TO Pumpkinville Creek meeting house
and hear me p. each tomorrow
Ned attempted to stammer some excuse
''I-I-that IS
When the divine resumed his devotional
hymn, and kept time with The music. stri-
king him over the face with the fieshy
part of The hand
"My soul mounted higher, in a chariot Of fire,
Nor did envy Elijah his seat"
Ned's promise of punctuality caused
the parsons exercise 10 cease, and the
words redolent of gorgeous imagery, died
away in echoes from the adjacent crags.
"Now, the third and last demand is per-
emp,ory." Ned was all attention to know
what was 10 come next. "You are to pro.
misc to seek religion, day and night, and
mover rest until you obtain it at the hands
Of a merciful rojeemer." The fall en- mar
looked a, tho declining sum-, and then at
the parson, and knew not what to say,
when the latter individual raised his voice
in song once more and Ned knew what
would come next.
ON do my BEST" he said in al humble
voice.
"Well, that's a man." said Mr.. Stubble-
worlh-"now get up and 60 down to the