The Jackson standard. [volume] (Jackson C.H., Ohio) 1847-1888, 1854-10-12
TAXING YEIINGs CooLE.Y.

TAXING YEIINGS COOLEY.
You are an Internal scoundrel !. said
ferce-lookiDg gentleman, the other day,
coming up with great wrath to Il Yankee
who was standing quietly on the sidewalk,
you are an internal scoundrel sir p
That's news to me, returned the Yam
kec quietly.
News you scqandrcl do YOU call it
news
Entirely So
you need not tlink 10 pair it off 50
easy. Isoy you arc an internal scoua-
drel, and III prove it =
1 beg you will not--I shouldn't Ike
much to be proven an Internal scouudrel!
No, | dare say !ou would mt; but an
swer ne immediately--did you or did you
not say in the presence Of certain ladies'
of nay acquaintance, that was a.
Calf! Oh, no, Sir--:he truth is not to
be spoken at all times
The truth " do you mean to call me a
calf sir =
%, no, sir--I call YOU no'hing.'
Its well you DO for if you had pre-
Sumed 10 call me a.
a mani should have been grossly
mistaken
DO YOU mean to say that am not a
man
'Ihatdcpends principally upon circum.
stances.
What circumstances =
If ! was called as cyidenc in court
of justice, should be bound to speak the
truth
And would you say that I was not a
man, hey Do you see that cowskiuP
Yes, and have seen it with surprise,
ever since you came up.
with surprise Why, do yousurpose
that | am such coward that ! dare not
undertake to use the article when it is De.
manded
Shall tell you what thought
do tiff you dare
4 thought to myself, what use has Z
calf for a cowskin.
you distinctly call me calf, then, dc
you!'
If YOU please to insist upon it, YOU
may
You hear that gentlemen speaking to
the by-stalders, you hear the insult
What shall | do with the internal scoun.
drel ?
Dress him! dress him = exclaimed
twenty voices or more with shouts o
laughter.
That III do at once, then turning tc
the Yankee again, he cried out, fercely
Come one step this way, you rascal. anC
III fog you within an inch of your very
life J
i We no OCCASION
You're coward J!
| Not on your word
'l'm liar, then, am : ...
Just as you please.
Do you hear that, gentlemen =
'Ay,' was the response, you can hell
logglng him now
oh, Heaven grant me patience F.! | J
fly out of my skin :
It'll be SO much better for your pock
ets-calt skins are in good demand.
Il shall burstP
Not here in the street, beg you
would be quite disgusting.
'Gentlemen, can any longer help fog
giug him :
Not if YOU are able, was the reply
At him r. .t...
Thus provoked thus stirred up and en-
couruged, the fierce gentleman went light
ening like at the Yankee. And before h
) could strike blow, he found himself dis
armed Of his cowskin, and lying on hi
back under spout of neighborln
pump, whittier the Yankee had carrie
him 10 cool his rage and before he coul
: recover from his astonshment at sue
unexpected handling he was as wet as
, drowned rat, from cataract Of waite
= which his antagonist literally pumped W
on him. His courage by this time, lik
that ofthe valient Bob Acres, oozed out {
the palm of his hands; and he declared
as he arose and went dipping away frol
the pump, that he would never trust
! q quiet appearances again and the o.
Harry himself might undertake to GOV
hide a cool YANKEE, for all Of him.
A A