Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1854-12-01
"Doesticks" on Candidates
and Lection in New York.


Mr.. q. X. Philander Doesticks, in the
Detroit Advertiser. thus Describes tho mali
sc,,;ons rocos..r,, g, ho ,.,,,,.,
9 :, " "'''''0 i0' VI
nee III I've" ork'
"No one is eligible to the Office Of May
OF OF 'ne Guy unless ne mas forged dram
,.'a soe Wv ,nomey y" ~ snu On az east
10 get The insurance. Candidates for Alder
men qualify Themselves by CARVING re.
yolver, getting beastly drunk, and stabbino
policeman or two before they get sober
/ The Common Councilmen must drink with
the Short Rows. pivo prizes IN the Firemen's
Target excursion. carry a sine shot in his
pocket and have n t,ersonal interest in n
/ Peter Funk auction shop. A Police Justice
must gamble little cte,t , consido,ai,i,
/ he rood deal and oct dr,nk ,clear ,bron,,h.
everv Safurdov nig5, 4. r. ho can roaA 49,,
words and write his own name. il Is oenet.
nllv M sorious ohicction. bnt tho Kno,v
No,binps will no, permit even this on The
,leo ,Lst ,he sc,.,,,, ~ Loo i; 'c 60,
crioin. A man who can pick n nnckct sci.
entlfcally viii make a GOOD constable A..
n:rants To minor offices are classified occor-
/ dino to desert. but no ono Who has not n,
/ least committed motif larceny i nlIoved a
place an anv reoi,lar ,icto, A. c,r a.
of more innortence should say from, yrb.t
can iudge. that mo- moncan over he elected
/ Govefnor of the state nnless In, ;s ,,niIty ~
n successful BURGLARY co4,,rii.o,s1 ,;i,
midnight MURDER
''as %" ~ i-e0'iDh
at one oil the ward polls
inspector, who was friend Of whiskey
man, received his ballot. PADDY Ind slip
ped in two others with his left hand, while
his right was on the box taking the oath.l-
/ Ills kind friends took him by turns into
eighteen different wards, IN every one OF
which he deposited whiskey vote, and
swore At IN; after the polls were closed and
he couldn't vote any more, they sent him 20
the station house for being drunk and dis
orderly Eated with their success IN th,s
instance the b'hoys now brought up newly
imported Duichman, who could only grin i'd
ioilcally and say faw' Inspector said I:
Are you voter Aaw. Are yod TWEEN
I iy-one years old " 'Yaw.' DO you live IN
The city : 'law.' Here one Of Nogg's
friends culpably lnterposed, evidently with
The desire OF rdicullng the august proceed
lngs, and asked, Have you got thirty one
wives another man asked u he had his
nat inll OF sour kfout--and a third was anN-
ious to be informed II he could stand upon
his head and smoke pipe, aud balance a
potato kettle on hls heels; TO all of which
he placidly responded, Naw.' Inspector
hurried % the rescue, and put the test ques
ton; DO you vote for Hogs, and ceiv-
ing the same compliment Naw,' he took his
vote and showed HIM aside. al sorts Of odd
customers came up TO deposit their ballots,
but 1t Is a remarkable fact that if they
wanted TO vote for Bogrs- Scrogs or Noggs
or, in fact, amy one but Hoggs. they were
sure to be crowded, showed and hustled, uni
generally lcf1 the room with bloody noses.
and their ballots still in their hands. Fun
grew fast and furious whiskcy man ahead,
bnt wanted tremendous majority the pau
per forces of Wards Island, visiting the city
for that occasion only, came up and voted.
Almost time 20 close the polls. but the In.
spe.tor kent the box open twenty minutes
after shutdown TO receive the votes of sixteen
promiscuous rascals. who had b,en hrbrrs
corDns ed from the 'mnbs particularly for
this occasion only. aud who voted every man
for Horrs.
Polls closed intense excitement; hon.
fires built; souibs, rockets. GUNS and CHI
pese crackers. liquor scarce. the candidates
having cut off the supplv as soon A. the vof
inc was over crowd sat down in bar rooms
and enrioe housos. and crowned about the
secret rooms to get dispatches about twelve
o'clock they bepan 10 come II was soon
evident that Noegs was beaten; Bogrs was
distance1. and Scroyrs was nowhere n was
Horps everywhere nogqs in The street;
Horgs in the tavern: Hoggs az the bonfire .