The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1854-08-09
4. Rich LStter.

a, Rich Lottex. S -
Tho following description of visit to
the Ohio State Agricultural Fair. last fall,
we find in the Portsmouth, Tribune. 1t is
one Of The best,things Of the kind we have
read for long time. a real .laugh and
grow tat yarn"-and though somewhat
outo OF date at tlis time, has lost nothing
" age. Read il:
OHIO STATE FAIR, DAYroN,2
September 1, 1853.
MIsTER Tribune. IIANNAs AND CLIP.
,FEas--Dedr Sirs: We are hefs on tho at:
fair grounds. all well and hartsome, close
to the Double Cilinder Batering Ram on
one side, and the Patent Cement Man and
Perpetual Squirtin' Jenny on tother, with
wimmen gigglin', chickens CROWN babies
cfyin'. and policemen oussin', all round
us--hopin you enjoy the same blessing
AS the Soiota was going out yesterday,
M. Taylor the gen,lemanly clerk, saw US
on tho Springville landing, and very per-
litely, stopped the engine. and reversed the
biIers, till we got in. Next morning we
was at Cfncinnaty and in few minutes
was transported 10 the cars. The oars is
. great sight. Imagine all the one story
houses in Portsmouth, tied together. and
!. behind them fastened all the stables and
apigpens--and then people at all the wind
cows, and team running off with all the
whole procession, and you win know . lit
Ne how they look, s.st
- While the Captain on the platform was
: s1oreWins his wheel, and the iron horses
blpwed their noses few times to get
good Start, / tried to get some gingerbread
for Jeemess But Just as handed over
my.quarter. and the boy reached over the
refreshments, the oars started. perlitely
ssked the little spider legged conductor at
the wheel, II he wouldn't stop and let me
reetify; but he only unscrewed and went
olIthe faster. saying he guessed had been
takin, too much Of the ..recti6sd" already.
Nj. Hannss. my blood billed, and If it
hsdn't been that the striped painted serpent
had to DO all the scrswin' tor the whole
train ID keep the oars from runnin' off the
track / d = knocked him off the macheen.
My wife and Sarah, my nephew, was
tboth afraid I'd break the car or tear my
cl6fhss.
- Al xsny ahsy stopped 70 eat q bite and
schengs bilers, and hadn't got down more
sehan three or four cups, when seed a
st1an q 1be head Of the table dishing out
S63ne kind Of gravy or soup. So thinks
ssgsl l, thai sthe esouperintendenta and he's
the man 20 tell Of concernin. the striped
panied cuss While the wimmen go: on
10 the,car. and the crowd hustled. 1 slip
ped up TO the soup man and told him how
I'd been treated. He seemed like 3 clav-
sst 9ellef. and the mora said. and the
mad9cr got. The better he seemed 40 feel.
Says hs. sit shall al be right,.' and says
j. aLslss drink" We'd just turned round
toths bar md, ,litted ths glasses, when. as
I said, 5sHere'1 luck 10 the railroad
{ soup s.some one hollsfsd out "All
rfbbardl" and away went the train swifter
3h9n hungry hound goes to dinner. "All
zohpard 3ays /, it they re not all aboard
Nh Philander Gump is badly perforated
anvhow
s s kpowed ii vas plan Of the striped
panfsdsyillsin to leaye mo, and determin.
ed long .lsgsa and Millin' deposition
,auds doslnny good. 10 overtake him. His
sp&seuh was up, and 30 was my dahder; and
] felt as though had little locomotive IN
e{hh le9 81 my pantaloons. Iran, Hemp.
cd, scrqtchedt gravel; elongated and ex-
tenuafed; dissipated space, eloped, till
natuxe did by me like panorama painted
on Hrhtning.., But it wouldn't do. I've
seen lhs day when I could have passed
him, 6e{oss Rsry . yictory, but ever since
aksn a. Eriesipesr has sillfsnsd my jints
Sarah, 6nd Jsames, and kesiah, waved
shsif hsndkerchisfs and hollered, Come
en-, Phil,p but laid down ndrolled over
and sweat, and swore more nor Genera
: washington 10 Flanders. The last thin
Il ese was the striped pants fadin' in tn
dTstanee,aansil the cfitter's legs looked lik
esMe grset snakes.
nj. Hsnnas, was so sizzin' hot If +
been dipped in the Ohio River, I'd 9 take
fsho "chili of tho water from Pittsbur
20 Padacah; The very rail sills smoke
where I touched 'em. and my pulse bes
like 3bs lit hammer in rolling mill. 3,
the two o'clock train took me on. and
sfSdnd the rsst Of the Gump family At III
,Fepix House. They said the clerk tol
hem al tie rooms was full, but they coul
have one long enough TO change in. s
they've been changin' ever since. an
Kssiah said she was bound to change q
nlto bus, what she would keep the room
sRaileS, we've seen all sorts Of sights, an
Ihearn al kinds Of sounds. I'd to Il
you hall, but between drinkin' beer an
Congress water, and Cinonade and Sod
walsr. and satin' cakes and herrin' ar
i6rRekers and apples and peaches and pa'
paws, my head . worse computicated tha
= crazy monkey,s. and my idears spi
round like ffoth in . glass Of ginger po
I took Kes5ah round to the patent doubl
a aciinR waterman, and was going to sho
.hsfs whore. il you'd turn one spigot, Il
water would fly out, and il you turn anot
ss Il wouldn't, but in the hustle turn'
The. wrong gigger; guess II was the Dutc
mans besr barrel, and / did not see I
mislakstill the poor girl browne
We pssssd on 10 the self.sdiusting APT
butter biler, and sot down to let the be
ssyssbut she fellow ~ the macheen let
string alp, and before ws could jump bae
Ahs whesls threw about barrel Of o
over ne. Kesish said that capped !
climax, | know'd no,hin,. Shout her clim,
but Lknoy'd iskep me from meesin' "
siko comlnitiao on beans.