Raftsman's journal. [volume] (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, 1854-12-06

Poor Dennis having concluded the recital
| of his misfortunes, wiped his eyes, which had
| filled with tears, and then proceeded to the
| performance of his duties.
-e~---
THE YANKEE IN Halliburton tells a capi-
| tai story of 'sThe Yankee in the Internal Re-
gions." His description Of some of the char
acters he found ssdown below" is laughable
in the extreme. Nebuchadnezzar, the King
of the jews he describes as good at ';all fours, "
and particularly expert in the preparation of
..salad.'' The introduction of the Yankee to
his internal majesty is peculiar.
aHow dye do folks, said the stranger, puff
| fling away at long segar SIS the boss devil at
hum'''
| His majesty looked sulphur and saltpetrc
at the intruder.
| 'Reptile' he exclaimed in voice of thun-
| der, that rumbled and reverberated in the
| depths of . pit without bottom 'who are you
that dare intrude upon our sacred privacy?''
sWhew' said the stranger, don't tear your
shirt! why what on earth is the use Of going
off half cooked in that way! Why do you jump
afore you're spirred, their amt such an al
OCCaSIOH iOI Ou ~ get cuE 80
awful riz, jist as if you was going to burst
your biler,-Seein' that your climates rather
of the warmest, it would only be doin' the
civil thing if you jist said, Mister toe the
mark, and take your bitters.''
s.Worm hence to your appointed place in
the yawning gulf! there in the hottest fame
"WeH, 1 guess notr drawlcd out the man,
~ oh
ticket, Mister, from the agent, and l don't
choose berth SO nigh the injine!"
~An Irishman going to market met far
mer with an owl.
.:Say, misther, wha'll You take for your big
eyed turkeys
sIt isan owl, ye baist,' replied the aston
ished farmer.
."Deyil bit do I care whether it's ould or
young, price the bird, We spalpeen."
--s~e->---
a CAUSE FOR EF.-First tJuveni1e.-sSay
Billy, where did you get that cigar?''
Second Juvenile.-.Why, you see, dad came
home to dinner little swipeseu, and stole it
out of his hat.''
First Juvenile.-( (Admiringly. .>-.Oh, amt
you one of 'em! wish my dad would come
home so too; but, (sorrowfully) then he don't
smoke, and l have to pick up old sogcrs.'
~.Twins, by the powers - cried the hor-
ror struck Irishman, as the nurse approached,
bearing new pledge Of affection from his
faithful helpmate.
Twins, h'iny,' cried the nurse; faith, Muir
dock, and its the blessed whiskey that makes
you see double this morningi''
W.Col. W. is fine looking man, amt her
said friend of ours the other day.
Yes replied another, Il was taken for him
| once.'
| you! why you are as ugly as sinI'
Il don't care for that; was taken for him
l endorsed his note and was taken for him by
| the Sheriff.
| Bg Julius, why didn't you oblong your stay
| at de spring
.Kase, Mr.. Snow, dey charge too much'
sHow am dat, Julius n
sWhy de landlord charge dis colored indi-
widual with stealin' de spoons.'
U person pointing out man who had a
profusion of rings on his fingers, to a cooper.
.Ah,' said the artizan, .It's sure sign of
weakness when so many hoops are used
~True glory consists in doing what de-
serves to be written; in writing what deserves
to be read, and SO living as to make the world