Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1854-09-27
MISCELLANY Y
From the Albion.
The Landlord and HIS Guests.

About sixty years ago. two Englishmen one day
arrived at Andernach. They went to an obscure
inn, kept by man named Du Long. They de-
sired to have his best apartments, spent a great
deal of money, relished the produce ofhis wretch
ed kitchen. and thought his addlterated wine
perfectly genuine. From day to day Du Long
supposed they would continue their journey, and
proceed to the capital; for, that they had come
merely to see Aldernach, was an idea too absurd
to enter anybody's head.
But, SO far from continuing their journey, and
proceeding 10 the capital, they did not even in
spect what was worth seeing at Andernach; for,
except going out now and then to shoot snipes,
they kept close at home, eating, drinking, and do
"They may be SPIES" thought the host, cor
runaways, or fools. No matter, what is that to
me? They pay honestly"
When he was sitting in an evening over pint
with his neighhor and relation, the grocer, they
used to rack their brains about the mysterious
guests.
"They are SPIES" said the grocer; ''one of
them squirts with his left eye."
ga man may squint without being spy" re-
oined the host 81 should take them for runaways,
for they read all my newspapers, for the sake OF
the advertisements"
His kusman then, assured him that all Eng
lishmen spent at least twelfth part OF their lives
in reading newspapers. The conclusion to which
they generally came was, that as the said foreign
ers were apparently neither spies nor runaways,
they conld not possibly be anything else than
fools.
Here the matter Tested. In this opinion DU
Long was still more confirmed, WHEN, at the end
Of few weeks, one Of his guests, an elderly man,
thus addressed HIM
Landlord" ;" said he,''we like your house and
if you will acquiesce in certain whlm. 1t is prob
able that we might continue for long time tc
spend our money with you"
"lour honours have only to give your COM
mands; an nnkeeper is, by profession, the slave
of all the whms that throng 10 him from all the
four quarters Of the globe"
'.You have, 10 be sure,n continued the English
man, chad prodigiously large beast painted on
your sign but your house is only ny among
inns it scarcely contains three tolerable rooms.
and unfortunately they look into the street. We
are fond of rest; we want to sleep. Your watch
man has very loud voice, and the coaches roll
the whole night along the street, SO as to make
the windows rattle. We wake every quarter ol
an hour to curse them, and fall asleep again TO be
awakened in another quarter of an hour. You
must admit, my dear fellow, this is enough to de-
stroy our health and exhaust our patience"
The host shrugged his shoulders. "How car
it be helped 2"
every easily y" replied the stranger; elf yor
are not afraid Of little expense; in which We
will 90 halves, without requiring at our departure
the smallest compensation"
Du Long, whose barren field had, since the ar
rival of the Englishmen, been daily fertillzed witt
shower Of guineas, promised TO do all that lay II
his power to satisfy his worthy guests; but hc
could not help the rattng of the coaches and bel
lowing of the watchmen
"Nether is it necessary" answered the stran
ger. "Behiud your house you have little gar
den, though YOU are no lover of gardening fol
except little parsley for your soups, observe
nothing in it but nettes. The old garden wall
too, IN spite of its thickness. is just ready to um
BILE. Suppose you were TO make use of this space
to run up little building, sort of pleasure house
even lift were to contain no more than couple o.
rooms 1t might be supported by the old wall, by
wkch means considerable part of the expense
would be spared, and the wall itself would be
propped up. AS just now mentioned for the
sake of quiet lodging, we would wlllingly de-
fray one-half Of the costs, and when we IIe gone,
the building will be yours. You will then have
an additional couple of convenient rooms to be let
If, on the other hand, you object to the proposal
We must leave YOU"
The host, however, had not the leas! objection,
though he thought within himself, "My klns-
man and was right enough in concluding that
these people were FOOLS"
He Immediately sent for brcklayer the place
was examined, and the Engshmen described
what they should like to have done. Jolsts and
bricks were quickly brought; three light wal'
were run up, the old garden wall formed the
fourth, from which sloped half roof; SO that the
whole looked more like wood house than habl-
tation but the strangers were satisfied, and Du
Long laughed in his sleeve.
Two months thus passed in mutual content the
golden spring flowed abundantly, though the VINE
grew worse and worse every day. The two
Englishmen very seldom quilted their lodging,
where they ate, drank and read the newspapers.
The only thing that surprised the landlord oil The
Golden Elephant was, that for the sake OF nOctur-
nal repose, they had built house for themselves,
and that now he very often perceived light the
whole Night through in their apartments
He once conjectured they might be colners but
as all the money they spent passed through his
hands, and their guineas, after most careful ex-
animation, were aiwass found to be good, his kins
man and he had again no other alternative than TO
set them down for fools.
One fine day in autumn, he saw them 60 out
with their guns slung over their shoulders. They
told him they were going to take the diversion of
snipe-shooting, and took leave of him for three
days, The three days passed and so did the
fourth, but the strangers did not make their appear
ance
On the fifth, Du Long shook his head on the
sixth his kinsman began TO shake his also; Gu
the seventh this suspicious circumstance was
communicated 10 the police; and on the eighth
the deserted habitaiion was broken open with all
| The formalities of law On the table was found
| 4 billet the contents of which were follows:
| "Dcdr Landlord MOT long since, we were
30 fortunate as to discover, in chest of old
parchments, deeds that proved that one of our an
cesiors formerly possessed at Andernach large
house. on the site of which three houses stand at
presont. yours Is one of the three. Whenour an
cestvr was obliged to flee he buried his gold and
silver at the foot of a thick wall which is still in
existence. Among lis papers we found one
which afforded satisfactory Information respecting
the situation of the building.
"We Immediately repaired TO Andernach, and
luckily found public house on the spot so inter
estinr TO us +; we took lodgings init examined
everything, and concerted measures to take pos
session of our lawful inheritance without exciting
notice. In what manner we removed all obsta
ces is well known to you.
"The great hole, and the empty iron chest,
which YOU will find under the wall in our cham
ber, are proofs that we have been successful
We make you present of the chest and advise
you to fill up the hole, and TO give yourself no
farther trouble about US all inquiries will be in
vain as the names we went by were only assumed
Farewell"
The landlord of the Golden Elephant stood
stock still, and with open mouth His kinsman
came both looked at the hole, and at the empty
chest and then at one another, and both agreed