Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1854-01-12
XARIETY.

And tire otbeT points above ik4
---..lsss-sssn
VARIETY. H
ExeoylSc rae P.fiitsOx "A nsiaistsl was
one Sabbath day examining the S9rday
school ia catechism before the congregation
The usuli question was put to the frsEIgiri,
a strapper. about thirteen years of agkl
was publican, in waiting on eustonAis =
.What Is your ramep said the parsonaI No
reply. .Wbst is year name 2 he repsited.
ina more peremptory manner 'NSRe Of
yourfan Nj Minister said the girl You
know nv name we'll enough Don't yHa say
when YOU come to~our house on Right -
Bet. bring me somemore ale2i Thecon
grsgation forgetting the siEredness. al the
place. we're ia board grin, and the PhFson
looked daggers. N HI
BaBlEs.-It strikes Us there,are meHd 6bs
told about babies thar anything elscil the
worli We all say that they are sEe#. yet
everybody knows that they are sour; Me all
saw they are lovely, yet nine babies III ten
have no more pTetension to beauty siau
pup.aog we praise their expfessiveIbyes,
yet all babies squint;; We call them olives,
though one Of them makes moro noisa than
colony of screcch owls.
~ The fellow who wrots this has left
kamschatks The women were afttF him.
With bToomsticks
~ a FORMAL old gentleman, finding his
horse uneasy under the saddle, slightI aud
called 10 his servant in the following nah
uer:
{ Tom, take of the saddle which Nippon
my bay horse, and lay il upon the gFpandi
then take the saddle. from thy gray Horse,
and put it upon my bag horse lastly, put
the other saddle upon the gray horseI
: The fellow gaped all the while, and at
last cried ont
Z. Lackaday, sir, oeuld you not have said
at ence, change tho saddles 2
10 Poetry reveals to US the loyeliHtss Of
nature brings back the freshness Of youth
fulfeeline. reyiyes the relish Of simpleIpleas
ures, keeps uuquenched the enthusiasm
which warmed the spring time of our being
refines youthful love, Strengthens ourEinter-
est in human nature, BY vivid deline9tisns
oGi3 tsP5sIsss sBa yqftsat ffiattstEfiais and
tCkaapEag.
nfThe individual who perpetratbh the
following choice stanza was geniusIan
lance of towards the setting sun. Hear
him
Men scorn TO kiss among themselves,
Il And scarce viii kiss brother;
Women of wat 10 kiss so bad,
They smack and kiss each other
). IRA country poet has addressed TIE fol
lowing lines so Laura"
Chen eharns q yourn mus, soon decay Il
With all the Joys that youth has brung;
For beauty quickly fades away II
Thpn6go il. lady. while you're young
nrAn old woman Observing sailSt 60.
ing hy~hcr door, aud supposing il to be her
son Billy, cried out to him, Billy. where is
my COW gone ? The sailorreplied in con
tempta6as manner, gene to the ID for
what know
We'll, as ysu are going that away, said
the old lady, I wish youweuld just let down
the bars II
.H-The following dialogue between two
negroes, was overheard BY friend oil burs
IN philadelphia Cesar, wot him call aab2
why, Massa Sip, unlike too much driRkee,
um think ub youg gal till um head 20 nauud
like um big wheel; den him make dam feel
ofhimself'
~ aahs.aSt, 'aue eis Iiiouy
some eueumbers
No, my child replied the lady.
why notli asked the girl
because should hate to be seen dafry-
ing them home, when every body knows they
are only a ecat apiece
:, n-A commissioner said to an insaaFent
debtor Pray, sir how could you wilfnlly, !
aud with your eyes open, contract such
I nun Der Of debts, With nomeans to pay theml' |
Sir, said the insslvent, i never wilfully /
, contracted debts, have done my best 70
enlarge them .Ei-
~ J constable pursued thief, Mhe |
took refuge oa a stump in = sramp land /
pulled the rail after him on which be went /
out The constable made the following re-
turn
sSightable -eonTersable-I9a est come |
at .able-in sRampum-u stampum-ftilo'
4-s Jane, VIA. letter in the alphabet |
do you like best ,, Well. don't like to /
say. Mr Saobbs.' Pooh nensense Tel |
right ous, Jane; which letter d. yoi. like |
best Well. lblushing and dropping her
:eyes,l ike Ubest'
-s Was Mr~Broxu very PECULIAR |
snaa when hs lived in your town III L |
should think he vas, replied the gentle 1
nan, as many persons endesvored tSlprs-
want his leaving, several constable followed /
hin for some distance
GrThs last do story is from Palette.
vile, Arkansas, where farmers doe k.s
bssa detected ia gsing to the heg.pea| and t
biting one Of the hogs sill be gets up. when
Archie hes down Ia the warm place and
es TO sleep
10y Boston paper thinks that steIline
minister's coat while preaching, anil the
sexsoa's hat while waiting upsn ! strIbeer
into church, is running rasealiiy int5 he
gfcnnd
Hon. II. A. Wise has recentlrEh.r.
risd. TO orr dear bachelor friends k6ll
sbtltins between two opinions. w SAY.
so and DO IKE Wiser
urSomebo1} asks, is il lawfsl to Hang
clothes On Nssoa and Dixou's line p Just
.s la8fal Is planting beans around she B6rtk
20 "a, going b draw his t.aa inc .
knss. q ths yoans by said . he hynsno-