Worcester daily spy. [volume] (Worcester [Mass.]) 1850-1888, 1854-04-04
Price Two Cents


Pun-gent Paragraphs
The RICHEST JOKE OF THE SEAsoN.--Ihe
wag of the Boston Post says, with inimitable
gravity, in relation to the recent election IN
that State i" The democrats of New Hamp-
shire achieved victory of which they have
reason to feel proud. &c. There is no paper
in New England that approaches the Post in
these little touches Of caustic huinor- Clinton
Co,Gam.
A CONSCIENTIOUS YouTH,- Mr., mayn't
lick some of that ere molasses \" asked nice
lad, Just from the s'rural DISTRICTS Of q mer-
chant on Long Wharf, the other day, WIG
was experimenting the landing OF cargo of
molasses.
YES, lick and be darned,'' replied the
owner abruptly. f%2fA
{" 1 won't now, returned the youth, I" kos
you swore. oness.e.
AN INGENIOUS M1xD.-~," At 8 trial for
murder in Waukesha, Wisconsin, a witness
on the stand, giving in his testimony as to
when and where his line of boats run, and at
what times, between Milwaukee,, Chicago,
Sheboygan, etc., one of the jury asked him
what time the boat left for sheboygan when
the judge asked the juryman his object for
asking the question. He replied that he
wanted to go to Sheboygan in a few days.,
and thought it good opportunity to find out!%
There was " model juror for you
"DRoP CANA few days since John
Van Buren, was dining at the White House,
when the President asked him what would be
the result if the Nebraska Bill passed. He
said t f4
81 think it will be dropped after a little
while asf ss,,
"Will there be much excitement about il %
81 think not--a good deal Of deep feeling,
but not much excitement $500
"Will the people move for repeal Y'Iss4 C5s.l
"No. 1t would take II years to change the
Senate. They can't wait for that. They viii
drop the Law as they did the Compromise Of
1S50-es especially the Fugitive Act" AHa ~
q" But hoe DO the people & drop things Of
this kind
/" They drop them by dropping all the men
who are connected with them.
If Prince John is not prophet, what's
he I 1ata s
WIrAr Will YOU TAKE 49," In one Of the
neighboring villages in the Hooser State as,
we gather from a note to the editor, not
many miles from the banks of the Ohio, lives
Judge b an eccentric character, who is
ever ready to accommodate himself or others as
occasion may offer. Being invited by a party
of friends whom he CHANGED to meet while,
passing q grocery, tone OII0OSe ESTABLISHMENTS
peculiar to small towns, where tar, treacle
and testaments, and other creature comforts
are sold by the small, , to step in and take a.
little something for his stomach's sake, he
readily consented; and although the variety
of liquors was by no means as extensive as
may be found in the more fashionable resorts
of your great metropolis, yet the freedom Of (.
choice was as readily granted; and the ques-
ton was proposed Judge b, what will
you take? The judge, after carefully survey
ing the stock in trade, for few minutes, re-
Piled believe aciH take a naackerel, which,
receiving he politely wished his friends
pleasant time over their tFed eye, and retired.
He was n asked to take anything after
that J "
CELESTIAL STABLEs.-Elder P, who
whilom preached in a certain town of this
"ked ntry,' was SO notorious for his queer
phrases and odd comparisons, that it finally be-
hoved the ''deacons'' to demonstrate with him.
The elder admitted the justice of the charge
brought against him; promised to amend his
speech heneeforward; and hoped that his fall
ings, grieyous though they were, would not be-
the cause of any diminution in their brotherfy
regard for him. ''For, brethren said he, eve
always hare hitched horses SO far, and [ hope
we may hitch horses hereafter in the stables
of eternal gloryl"