The Shasta courier., 1854-01-07

es aud paw-paws, my heads worse compuatica-
ted then crazy monkeys, and my idears spi,
round like frotil in a glass OF ginger pop. | took
Kesiah round to the patent, oouble-acting water
ram, aud going To show her where, If you' I,
turn one spisot. the water would fly out. and il
you'd turn another it wouldn't; but in the bus.
tie turned the wrong jigser-I guess it was
some Duichman's beer BARREL and didn't see
the mistake till the poor girl was nearly drown
ed.
We passed on TO the self adjusting apple but.
ter bier, and sot down to let the beer dry; but
the fellow at the masheen let the string slip and
before we could jump back, the wheels threw
about half barrel of the sass over u.s. Ke-
siah said that clapped her climax. | know'd
nothin bout her climax. but know'd it kept
me from meetn with the committee on beans
Cne of the most natural curiosities on the
ground was the ''calf with two legs" They
charged dime to look at the one under the
curtain; but l thought there were enough out
side TO be seen free.
The "Nincompoop Cordial seemed to attract
a great deal of attention. 1t was intended for
persons afflicted with the simples, and weak
ness or stiffness on the top OF the head. The
agent had numerous certificates showing that
persons badly added could pass for sensible at
least ten minutes alter each dose. One weak
brother" had overloaded his stomach, and inn
aglned himself new machine for running the
thing into the ground.' 1t took . to hold him :
The "Nincompoop Cordial " took the premium
"a pair OF leather specs, warranted not to cut
in the eye
While l was scraping off the appe-sass, it
was discovered that one of the premium rolls Of
butter had disappeared and some knowing
looking individual ventured the opinion that il
had been taken off by the man who had been
round Offering to remove grease spots"
member of the swell head club promptly ham
ded the fellow bright button for the informa-
shun.
Jeemes got down on what looked likely lit
tie box, to eat a bite but it was some new con-
trapton of blasted beehive. The child had
just kivered the opening, and Sary had to slash
around ight lively to knock the bees off. AS il
is, the coat tails all stuck together, and the
child looks like fright.
The stocks and cattle and other agricultural
implements is very lively. One horse said to
be as gentle as a ram. kicked my new hat clear
across the ring, while was feeling his windy
gals. And | seed another animal they called
the Sheep-o-ass-a-muss-an onnatural curiosity
on four legs. Sometimes it makes strange
noise. and at other times it didn't. His owner
said he had him sixteen years, and expected to
have him sixteen years longer if he didn't die.
He was hall sheep. half ass, and half asleep.
But the band is playing Hail Columbus, and
Pm too excited to write any more There's
fellow here making money selling bugs He
says they are indispensable in every family, and
help to keep up helthy cirkelation and excite
the nervous system. Some men have got rich
just by one of these bugs. Mr. Barnum, he says,
is one of 'em; but l don't know him. He says
the man that invented Radaways Ready Re
lief" and the "All Hcalin' Apple Sass" each
had one of en-. They hum ID little tune called
- The fools is not all dead yet" Every body
is buying one. He calls EN- hnm-bugs
But hers The omnibus for the Fcnix House,
and l must Stop. Yours truly,
PHILAXDFR GUMP.