Eastern times. [volume] (Bath, Me.) 1846-1857, 1854-07-13


short and crusty for courteous host.
Won't you pass the biscuit to Mrs. Meek
lie, husband!' said Mrs. Somes, with he
sweetest smile, albeit not very sweet at that
Mr. Somes did pass the biscuit to Mrs
Meeklie, and she took one; but when he pas
them to Mr.. Meeklie, he smilingly declined
No thank you, Mr. Somes l never ea
hot bread. 1t does not agree with me, sait
he.
Mrs. Somes passed the cold bread, think
ing all the time how very uncivil it was in
the parson to refuse the hot bissait she had
taken SO much pains to prepare.
But MIR. Meeklie was very respectful to his
stomach, for he found when insuted and i'm
posed upon, that it was tyrannical and disa-
greeable, and he paid more Difference to his
digestive organs than he did to the feelings OF
his vain parishioners
My biscuit are not very nice / did not
have as good luck as | generally do sug-
gested Mrs. Somes, as Mrs. Meeklie took a
second cake.
Better 7 interposed Mr.. Somes
The lady looked at him with very evident
marks of displeasure.
They are very nice, said the parsons
wife,
Take little more of this ounce preserve
Miss Meeklie. | dare say it is not so nice as
your mother makes; but the truth is
1t has stood too long, interrupted Mr.
Somes. 'The jar has not been opened since
you were here last fall
Mrs. Somes looked daggers but the par
son very considerably asked Mr.. Somes
whether he had done planting, just at that
moment, and her anger evaporated without
any unpleasant effects
Husband, won't you pass that cake to Mr.
Meeklie!'
Thank you, Mrs. Somes, l never eat cake
Your bread is very good will thank you
for some more
Really, Mr.. Meeklie, you will take some
of this cake 1t is not rich, there is very
little butter in it,
Not any, thank you; never eat cake,
unless it is something very simple such as
gingerbread, or molasses cake
What a calamity -Four kinds of cake and
the parsOn won't touch one of them.
But you will take some of these jumbles
made them on purpose for you
That's a fact, Mr.. Meeklie, added Mr..
Somes, nAsliciousl}.
lie would further have added that his wife
never made pies and cake for her own family !;
but he was afraid Of frightening the parson.
You must excuse me. / doubt not they
are very nice; but have to be very careful
Mrs. Meeklie and her two grown up daugh-
tiers were more courteous, and each nbbled a
small bit of the rich pound cake, but they
seemed to do it against their conscience and
againt their better judgment.
The truth was they felt embarrassed by the
extraordinary display Mrs. Somes had made
They did not feel at home. The whole affair
was too set and artificial to be enjoyed, and at
an early hour the whole party withdrew, men,
tally determined to make it long time before
they took tea with Mrs. Somes again.
Wife, where is the piece of meat | sent
home for dinner!' asked Farmer Somes, as
he and the boys came in for their MONDAY
meal, on the day following the tea party.
The farmer glanced enquiringly at the ta-
bic which was spread before him. lnvolun-
tarily his nasal organ contracted longitudinal
ly it would not be polite to say he turned
up his nose,' though such was the fact, be-
yond the possibility of denial.
Farmer Somes was not, in any sense, an
epicure. He liked a plain, substantial diet,
that (which was good and enough of it, as
he forcbly expressed his ideas of table econo-
my.
Lest the reader should suppose he was one
of those grouts, ill-natured feeders, who
would grumble at the ambrosial and the nee
tar of the gods, we deem it necessary to par
who placed four kinds of cake before company
Certainly there was variety enough to sat
isfy the most tickle taste. On broken plate
the best dishes were religiously reserved to
the use of company-was the half of one sau-
sage and two-ihirds of another making one
sausage and One-sixth, all told. They were
partially imbedded in a petrifed sea of sus-
picious looking fat, and altogether, the aspect
of the dish was singularly forbidding.
On white plate, with long black fracture
extending quite across it, lay in an aggregat-
ed mass, three dozen baked beans, and an in
hnltessimal fragment of pork rind. This was
an antiquity. Farmer Somes and the boys
had very distinct remembrance of having
seen this dish every day for fortnight, prov
ing that Mrs. Somes was not only one of the
most economical, but one of the most obstinate
DANES in the world. The farmer and the
boys had virtually said they would not eat
those same beans; and Mrs. Somes virtually
said they should.
On worn-out blue plate, superannuated,
and 'nicked' in thousand places, were four
pork bones, looking as though they had been
Preyed upon by that army of mice which
Whittington's cat destroyed. These bones
had seen service during the last twelve days
The joint, ofwhich they were the disintegrat-
ed members, had graced the table just fort
nipht hefora