The Athens post. [volume] (Athens, Tenn.) 1848-1917, 1854-03-10
DICK TROT AND HIS YANKEE CLOCK.

DICK TROT AND HIS YANKEE CLOCK
"Well, sir" said Dick to me one day
sabout five years or better ago'I bought q
wooden clock from Yankee pedlar, named
Tom Jones, who used to travel through this
country, dropping one Mt almost every house,
twas the last one lie had, and paid him fif.
teen dollars for it. She was perfect gocr
of clock, and then such beauty! Her little,
squatty, dumpy fgur', dressed out in her
painted case, just filled my eye exactly to a
goats heel. sot her on this shelf, so might
alters see her. Her little penjum would swing
back ards and forards, dickin' at proper
rate. Thar she'd roll it, beckin' day after
day, and week after week, dead bent on
keepin' up with the sun, and determined that
nary tmepiecc in the settlement should ge,
ahead Of her. Shed dig Mt the hours, reve,
stoppin' to catch breath, but jist fire away in
admirable style. I'd wind her up o'nights
and then 60 to bed, putin every confidence
in her, and bein' perfectly satisfied that she'd
do her, duty faithfully, although | wasn't
watchin' her; wouldn't allow the sun to be
up before she'd put her hand to the hour
for sunrise. And then sir, when I'd be rest
less and couldn't sleep, or when ! was sick,
then what company she was to me! To be
shure, she couldn't talk 10 me--jist call me
by name-thats all. Though sometimes she
sed Dick" SO plain, I'd look up to her, and al-
most expect her to lead off a regular built
chat. Well, sir, she continued to do so for
five years, and WAS my hearts delight In
fact, may say that she hilt on longer than
that, but twas about that time she began
monstrously to exemble old Dave Wilson's
wife-you know how she was9'
"Can't say ! do exactly"
"Why, sir, | thought you knowd.-Old
Dave used to say that his wife was char
min cretur; one of the best of women: that
he didn't believe from old mother Eve down
to the present generation, better woman
never throwcd a pettcoat over her head.
TO be sure, he said, she ha6 her ways. (iere
Dick snuffled in imitation of old Dave, whom
knew very wcll.) She would have her
ways, and such ways she did have We'll,
sir, my clock got to be the same way. Some
of her works got out of fix, and for spite, she
done jst rs she blamed pleased. Strike! yes
sir, she did, like all dignation! She'd take n
notion to bugle of sometimes, and she'd
ring in on them wires one hundred and fifty
times. At first Twas tickled at it, and would
set and laugh Mt her for bein' such fool as
to be cuttn' up the cxtrays, what didn't hurt
nobody but herself. But at last begun to
get tafod OF sicn ioolcry. II seemed to mo
whenever l had tough job before me, and
wanted to study it out, or whenever | was
right sleepy, then she'd pick her chance to
come them big ticks. Iput up with it long
time; didn't do nothn' to her-and thort by
lettin' her have her fun out, she might get
tired of it herself after while. But she
didn't she still hilt on stontcr an ever. On
last Sat'dy went up here to muster, and, rs
| alters have done on such occasions, tuck
rather too much of the tech.me.lightly-
When | got hum, thort the best place for
me was in bed, SO to sleep off the boozy,
pulls off and gets in bed; but no sooner did
my head tech the pller than up starts the
clock-ch.r-ing determined to put stop
to any such capers that night. ! got up,
loaded my old musket, tuck cheer, and sot
down right afore her.
'Now, old LADY, scz ], yer arter the old
spite game again are ye! Jest go on ef ye
like it; but dar' to strike hundred this time,
and ding me Of ye don't ketchit! My threats
didn't skcer her one bit; she strucL away,
'peared like iveier than ever. She went so
pcarty, she soon got up to nincty-ninety.
One--t W o-thrce-four-fve- see
ye gwyin' it, scz I, and cocks the old mus
kct-ch-r.r-ring-l puts it to my shoulder
chr-r-r-ring-I takes my sight-chr-r-r-ring
Il lays my finger on the trigger-ch-r-r-ring,
sez she; stouter an ever, and starting with
another ch.r-r-whcn flames away, and in
half secin' finds myself flat on my back, in
the middle of the floor.
As picked myself up, heard the old lady
still goin' it; and darn me il she didn't strike
fifty times more, altho' twenty-five buckshot
took effect among her countenance, and both
her hands taken smooth off. Ihain't wound
her up sence: for with the pluck she's 60,
there'a no known what she might do if she
had chance. She's without exception the
best game I ever seed
MoRAL.-Although it may be well to 'tak'
time by the forelock,' yet it would be bette
not to do so rashly.