The weekly Lancaster gazette. (Lancaster, Ohio) 1852-1855, 1854-03-23
wednesday Even'g March %, Iss4


VRoIErA HAIR SFLirrfHo Shows UP.-
Mr.. CAMPBELL. Of Ohio, is one sfths keen.
est members in Congress, and although a
Wing. the Democratic Washington cores
P~ondent Of the Cineinaati E4qulrer, thus
pleasantly and truthlully writes OF him;
Now and than the doings Of the House
are robbed Of their usual monotony and be.
come amusing. inslructing and lively. The
other day that branch was no little indebt.
ed, for a ehaDge in its sleepy mood, 10 Mr..
Campbell, Of your adjoining district. Camp.
bell, by the way, whatever we NAV say Of
his politics, is one Of the most actiy e, i1fiu.
entail, working and popular members that
the great West has on the floor. A debate
had sprung up on a bill to mako a grant of
lands TO one Of the Western States to aid in
the construction Of Railroads. One or two
Of the Virginia delegation opposed il on con.
Stitationai grounds, alleging that Congress
had no right TO donate lands to the States
&c. Campbell pitched into him, about alb
Observation-Disclosures abstractions"-cal-
ling up to their recollection TINT bur a brief
period had elapsed since hey had voted to
give TO all the States, where thew live. all
the wet or swamp lands in their limits. by
which act many Of the States obtained large
amounts Of the finest lands in their limits.
That was constitutional with them, because
the lands were toe!; this was unconstitutional
because the lands are dry. or Mr.. Bayly,
one Of the hair splitters, he said:
"He deemed it sxpedient for Congress to
grant the lands because they were wet, and
generated disease. All new lands generate
disease. Whenever, then, the surveyor
might have a shake ofthe ague, it would be
constitutional to make the grant! These
wet lands, sir. were the property Of the Gov
eminent. and far, very far, from being WORTH
less. In Illinois they got nearly two mil.
hons Of acres, principally wet prairies-
highly valuable for stock farms"
Then he presented the constitutional fea-
ture in more general terms, after. this style:
confess | cannot appreciate very highly
this constitutional hair splitting-this net or
dry standard Of construction. II reminds
me ofa way we had of settling disputes in
my school-boy days. When about to en-
gage in a game of "bandy, I" or "town ball.
two boys acted as captains. In making
choice of their parties, one spit upon a chip
and tossed it up. If the wet side came up
permost, he had first choice, and il the dry
one the point was settled against him. II
seems that this is about the way to decide a
constitutional question, arising on a bill to
grant lands. Virginia splits on a chip, and
losses it up and takes ground accordingly.
Laughter. The whole thing is a game OF
"wet and dry" laughter. 1t saves much
wear and tear of intellect. But it is not
the only case in which these statesmen
construs the Constitution on the "wst or
dry" principle. [Rcnswed laughter They
tell US now the Missouri compromise line
10 Unconstitutional; tour years ago they
tried to extend it beyond the Rocky Noun
tains. If they could only stretch it out SO
as to dip the western end of it into the salt
water of the Pacific, and make it a
little 'cst, that would remedy all constitutions
al defects. Renewed laughter,
Mr.. Bayly couldn't get over this, it was
too dry a joke.