Plymouth advertiser. [volume] (Plymouth, Ohio) 1853-1988, 1854-08-05
Tyranny Of the Petticoats,
BY FANNY FERN.


ave males swagger and talk of Our su-
periority, but only the savage has practical
dominion over "weak sex, 'smply because
he bangs his refractory female in lordly
style! We don't beat our women, and are,
therefore, slaves: we are forced to knock
under, because we have fastidious notions
of knocking them down! This may be
quite correct; Ionly state the fact without
commentary. Unheaen women is ty-
rant. A little blood creature with fair
eyes, fragile figure, whom you could crush
in your manly grasp, somehow or other
you find yourself trembling before het /, as
before crowned potenta,e. She bends
you to her purpose, to her caprices; if you
gyaif not before her anger, she rushes into
Mysteries What is helpless, and above
all, clubless man to do. BE meek and
acquiescent"
OF coarse no other way my dear sir,
if you want your shirts made to sui. you,
your old pants resurrectionized, your din
ner kept hot, or any other little accom-
mediation, (when you are in hurry and
can't stop 10 discuss maters.) "Clu5less
mani" | like thai; I'd like 10 know if
they don't always resort to ARMS when
they intend TO subdue us2 | merely ask
for information, as om nm old maid my
SELF Now there is no use trying to drive
any of the female gender, I'm one ofthe
sisters, and fell myself qualified to take
the foor,' Mr.. Chairman) There's no
necessity of making suck bungling piece
of work of matrimony. Were l a man,
III engage TO manage any wife you'd bring
along. Between you and |, | should
keep the bits and reins out Of sight y but
I'd do it! She should be as docile as a
kitten, and believe herself master of the
house, too! Oh, pooh you don't under
stand the philosophy Of The thing It's nj
every man that has call to be husband
DO you suppose if you feed and clothe 4
wonan, and keep her warm, that's the end
of the chapter? Pshaw : imagine me to be
TOM Fern
When | came home from the Office, |
ehnnld take microscopic view of my
dear fanny's face, TO sea which way the
wind blew. If she looked dull from the
thousand petty annoyances Of housekeep
ing, l should just put my arms around
her blessed little neck, (never minding
collar and fxings,) and tell her didn't
care a damaged cigar whether 1 had my
favorite pudding or not, if she only loved
me. Wouldn't she brighten up, hey
Do you suppose I'd go staving up and
down the room like hyena, and knock
over her woIk-basket, and tread on the
baby, and break the bell>wire. and scowl
till looked like one of those gu>ta percha
phizes. No, sir! Then I'd kiss her,
and 'ell her to keep up her spirits till !
came homo at night, and we'd have an
early tea, and hear little Tommy Say his
r. prayers. and go to-(well darsen't Soy
il; Ouri-d take neI rtIUIv:
Well, sir, the consequence would be
she would see was the same fascinating
Tom who begged her on my marrow bones
on moonlight evenings, 'to make me the
happest Of men, and there isn't one wo
man in thousand Created that way )that
wouldn't love till you were as hap
py as fly in molasses cup AS to {
meek man, defend me from Bettys in cor
duroys! I'D prefer to endure the bang
ing of a refractory female!' I'd rathe
be under tyrant than OVER Moses