Thibodaux minerva. [volume] (Thibodaux, La.) 18??-1858, 1854-04-22
Hain't been Stealing Nothing.


A rich incident occurred q short time since in
.,e If the Country Courts in Vermont, which
70 consider too good to be lost.
MANY of the jury, together with the Judge
.nd LAWYERS were intending to participate in q
sslebrstion of society in which they were
,~smbers, and were, consequently, in their an
-;etv to close the term, rushing cases through
nth all despatch that honor and justice would
Athalf-past IL o'clock one day, an intermis-
.;on of half an hour for dinner was granted,
With strict injunction from the judge that all
hands must be back punctually at one o'clock,
To commence new case of larceny.
The dinners that day were swallowed with
greater rapidly than usual, and as the clock
Struck one, the officers of the law rushed into
court like chickens into meal trough.
While they were eating their dinners, how
ever, a young man from the kedntry," being
somewhat anxious to see the manner in which
Justice was melted out, walked into the court
room, and as he afterwards expressed himself,
took squirt at all the seats, and seem there
was no one in the incest one, with railin' all
around it, thought he'd make sure on it, fore
the fellers got back from dinner"
In five minutes after, the crowd entered the
room. the judge raped the desk with the but
end of his jack knife, and with digni6ed frown
cried:
"Silence n the COURT"
"Silence n the court" repeated the broad
shouldered constable leaning on the railing in
front of his honor, Immediately resuming the
occupation of picking his teeth with pin.
"Silence n the court" echoed the squeaking
voice Of small red headed constable near the
Nd fhn 1utt aEnrc commanded elbow.
ing the crowd right and left, to let them know
that he was around. r
GAN ready?" said the Judge. " -.-
sAn ready" replied the attorney.
"Command the prisoner to stand up" says
the Judge, f" while the indictments being read. y
The broad-shouldered constable now walked
to the prisoners box during the apparent mo-
mentary absence of the sheriff, placed his hand
on the shoulder of the young man, and ex-
claimed:
"Stand up!'
"What fur!" said the astonished young
farmer.
"To hear the charge read" exclaimed the
constable.
avail, l guess kin hear what's goin' on
without standin', as well as the rest ON 'em, was
the reply.
ISLAND up" roared the Judge in burst of pas
sion-he has just bitten his tongue while pick
ing his teeth-"young man, stand up or the
consequence be upon your own head"
The victim came up on his feet as if under
the influence Of galvanic battery, and looking
around the court room and noticing that all
eyes were upon him, with an expression about
as affectionate as that of q rabid man towards q
bowl of water, he hung his head in confusion
and notification, and was nearly deaf to the
80 81 h,,&h hoI hoO ySH yVfrk1
of the long, complicated, tangled sentences to
learn that he was charged with stealing or en-
bezzling, or cheating or differing some house or
somebody, and he couldn't tell exactly which.
"What does he say to the charge? Guilty or
not guilty !" inquired the judge, peering over
his spectacles with look cold enough to freeze
mans blood. sGuilty Of not guilty!" st-
The young man ventured to look up in hopes
to find sympathsing eye, but all were cold and
unfriendly, and he again gazed on the saw
busted aoor, and trembled with confusion.
"Guilty or not guilty." again vociferated
the Judge, in tone that plainly denoted i'm
patience to proceed with the case.
The broad shouldered constable, being rather
humane man, now stepped up to the prisoner
and exclaimed n. g,- VI
"You had better say mot guilty of course!
II YOU say guilty you don't stand no chance,
this term, that's sure! and If you say not
guilty. and wish, at any future state Of the
case, to change your plea to guilty. You can
do it without injury to yourself! therefore, l
advise you to say not guilty. and stick to it as
long as there is any chance"
Jonathan's feelings had been simmering some
time, but now they actually boiled over, and
with look Of innocent but determined resolu-
ton, he swung his arms about his head, and
exclaimed
"What in all natur' are yeou fellers tryin'
to dew? haint been stealin' nathin'! hahn
sws r. 59
Inst at this moment the front door opened,
end the sheriff, with the genuine prisoner walked
into the room and proceeded at once to the box.
The court in moment saw its mistake, and
tried to choke down its effect with frown, but
it was no 90. The crowd bust forth in horse
laugh that fairly made the windows rattle, and
the young man left the room, exclaiming, as he
went out of the door 81
II know'd all the time hadn't stole nothin'. y
sax,s sst n Literary Ausesns.