Daily evening star. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1852-1854, 1854-03-10
DAILY EVENING STAR.
PEREGR1NA ON THE BLooMERs.

e'SS' l. ocoSi Noo lWo StouI SSuutIuell talh'
ing very energe,ically. The Nebraska bill
| said to myself As they had got quit,
near, one of them struck a cane agains
the pavement and exclaimed, Il tell YOU
Sir, its the women-it's s the women 90
Oh. oh said l to myself as I looked
after him: what's the matter, old Bach
elor !? You got up wrong foot foremos
this morning! Your shirt had only on,
button on it, and you had cold break
fast. Where did you spend last evening
Did the Fox women cheat you out of 8
dollar Z or did the pretty widow say
" No" Did some lady coax half a
dollar for the Orphan Asylum or have
you been looking at Mrs. Stoves angelic
daguerreotype at Whitehurst' There
has been thunder and lightning some.
where among your moral elements tc
turn your milk Of human kindness into
clabber. On he went, humping with
his stick, and abusing the women and
on went determined to think the matter
over conscientiously. What in the name
of wonder has possessed the women now
a-days!
pSiSoho Nouio dhSWSl tfllS IutS-
ton at oEce, by saying the old boy has
possessed them. But this answer is about
as big as piece Of chalk. There is some
particular tcrOng somewhere, orwe would
never hear of so many rights. There is
some Eve abroad in the world, and she
has had talk with the serpent. He
has waited his poison into the golden
ringlets that adorn her fair head, and
the winds are waiting this poison among
the nations. An ill-wind has blown
the most Of it to the United States.
They say that only Time, the healer, can
extract this poison, but 1 wish it could
be done more expeditiously, or | wish |
had lived in the last century before the
feminines got in such musS.
Father Peter. how they do 90 ON !,
here, too, on the banks of the Potomac.
Spirit of Washington / deemed thy ling
erings would preserve from isms, and
ations, and Ologies, the shores of the
river in which George used to 20 swim.
ming, whenever his mother would let
him, and where the immortal father Of
his country and the digrified Martha used
to take their evening walk to insure di-
gestion.
Short-sighted Peregrina that was !.
For in the very streets Of the city, found
ed by "the first in the hearts of his coun-
trymen," Boomers walk unmoiested.
Here, too, in our halls are woman s rights
advocated-while spiritual rappers de-
lude, and-rise up from your graves, We
women of the revolution in the reporters
gallery of the Capitol itself woman is
sealed among the grosSer sex, reporting
for woman rights paper and-strong
minded feminines sit in the galleries of
the legislative halls vowing by the ghost
Of. Semeramis and by Bloody Mary, that
by 1860, in the very seats where are now
ensconced the portly corporeals of grave
and reverend seignors, the Bloomer cos
tune will recline, encasing within its
arrangements hearts deter
mined to break down the barriers be.
tween man and woman.
Well, let them do it, if they can, so as
| am out of the way when that time ar
rives. If 1 am alive then, | shall do
something desperate and deciSive-take
strychnine-expatriate myself-or get
married to a bachelor. am disguised
six years beforehand. Will nothing sat-
isfy the women! What do they want
Dc they not have the best seats in church
es and in omnibuses Are they not
helped first at table, and always put far
theSt off from the boiler Oh steamt bats
Are they not invariably fed before the
other animals at suppers: and don't the
lords always give them the path in muddy
weather, and take the cutters for them
selves ! Do they not get the nice warm
seats by the fire In winter, and the cool
breezy places by the window in summer
Can't they 60 to parties, and dinners.
and wear flowers and laees, and rouge as
much as they like! Did you ever hear
of husband (American) that did not of
fer up his life a daily sacrifice to his wife.
to make her time pass pleasantly! Is it
not the invariable rule for wives lin the
United States) to keep the money? Is
there wife in this free and blessed land
who cares fig what her husband says
or a husband who dares say his soul is
his own. except when he is at a secret
meeting of the west end Club Oh, |
am in a complete perspiration when |
think of the unreasonableness of the wo-
men No wonder that asthmatic bach
elor thumped his stick so hard on the ave-
nue., when he said "It's the women, sir,
it's the women -- ea .fr
One thing, gentlemen, l propose: this
pantaloon business will never prosper.
A young, pert girl, looks well enough in
Turkish trousers; but think of an old
lady of seventy, with null muslin cap
aid spectacles, the crimped ruffies sur
mounted by jaunty Bloomer hat and
and a pair of trousers on, fast
ened about her ancles Think of a lot
of them assembled at meeting at the |
Orphan Asylum in boots and short |
jackets! Fancy the ladies at a sewing |
society equipped in buff waistcoats and
short breeches Gentlemen, I have
allowed myself to become excited. Il
must retire to my room and lie down. |
All! l am thankful am not Bloomer. |
1t must be so uncomfortable to take a |
nap after dinner in pants. Skirts forever,
gentlemen of the Star! -...a5 |
l hope, then, it may not be nay fate to |
See Bloomerism prevail. If, however,
the strong-minded should carry the day.
and our fates, gentlemen, be reversed i
should l, by the revulsions of time, be-
come the editor Of the Evening Star. and