The weekly Minnesotian. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn. Territory) 1852-1858, 1853-05-14
NUMBER 35..


the command of Capt. Lodwick, who. report
says. was zone Of 'em. gincrally spcakin,' in
those days. We can point out some dozen or
more such hard cases, who used to ssgp it"
here, in tue days whereof we write; aye, We
can point TO their tomb-stones now, too On
that trip all things conspired for good time
the liquor was good and plenty the cigars
were good the stories Were good--and every,
one was full of1hem. One of the crowd, who
couid get oil the former two faster than the lat
ter, soon had three sheets in the wind Some
ol thc boys found his hat-a straw hat-and
GREW 1t up about an inch. When our particu-,
Lar nero mad occasion to put it on. its no-po
propehsiticS were apparent even to his fuddlcd
brain. :" This is my hat-I know il nv tbe to-
Sacc0 stan on s> ahs lang Sjls ssMsaS US SH
crown; but the more he tried the more it
wouldn't go On. Il say, you, old Pulls, is this
my hat! and am Joe M.?'' was his running
inquiry of Dr.. ID. "Well. expect so you look
mortally like that same old chap" was the re-
ply; but what's the matter of Your head Joe!'
Pills had his cuc--''my conscience! it's as
big as half busheI." .'Oh nothing. nothing:
if I'm Joe NJ. that's my hat, and Fin going to
wear it, ID ii don't. Just you hold it up,
while take running dive at it, Deliber-
atcly laying off his coat, he took fair plunge
at the offending hat which the doctor adroitiv
turned so that the stiff straws would take n
good hold in his hair. Fire! murder! brim-
stone! hills a6oat and the rivers rising! /
say. Doctor, has my head sweled, or has that
cusscd hat shrunk?' "Your head is swellcd,
no mistake; get bucket of water and put
Your head in it; it will take the inflammation
out He did as directed and while he was
thus performing, the hat was united and re-
stored to its usual size. The water did take
the the INFLAMMATION out and put little inf0r-
nation i'll, and Of course the hat went on.--
- Don't that beat the ID. l say, Doctor,
maybe that last brandy smashcr mixed up the
champaign, and set it to work again; that's
what swelled my hcad-glad it didn't bust."-
Prairie du Chen Courier. ..
a FooL DECisloN.-A poor beggar III Paris,
being very hungry, stayed so long in a cooks
shop who was dishing up meat that his stOm-
ach was satisfied with only the smell thereof--
The choleric coyitous cook demanded of him
to pay Tor his breakfast. The poor man denied
it, and it was referred to the decision Of the
next man who should pass by. who chanccd to
be most notorious idiot. lie determined that
the poor mans money should be put betwixt
empty dishes, aud the cook recompensed by the
iingling, as he was satisfied with only the smell
of the cook S meat.-FuYcr.
1t is ill-manners to trouble people with talk
ing too much either of yourself or your affairs.
If you are full of Yourself consider that you.
or yonr affairs, are not So Interesting to other
people as to you.
When Sir William Hamilton announced to
the Royal Irish Academy his discovery of the
central sun-the star round which orr orb Of
day and his planetary attendants revoive-n
waggish member exclaimed " What our suns
sun! why, that must be grand sum-
HoRRoRs OF WAR.-A special committee ap-
pointed by the Board of New York Aldermen
to investigate the condition Of the New York
Volunteers who fought in Mexico, has made n
report. The regiment originally numbered
one thousand men, of whom only two hundred
and seventy survive sixty of whom reside in
New York About thirty need immediate aid,
A resolution was passed apprOpriating Sl,o00
for their relief. Over sixty of these volunteers
have died since returning from Mexico, half of
which have been buried at the private expense
of Lieut. Senior, who was an officer in the regi-
ment. Many are sick and suffering from the
climate of Mexico, and the history of this regi-
ment is sad commentary upon the horrors Of
war
To THE GIEIs-I1ere is paragraph of plain
talk to girls which is worth library of Young
Ladies' Friends or whatever may be the title Of
the wishywashy compends that are sold for the
benefit of that interesting portion of the COM
munity:
Men who are worth having want women for
wives. A bundle Of gew-gaws. bound with o
string of flats and quavers, sprinkled with CO.
lOgne, and set in a carmne saucer-this is no
help for man who expects to raise family OF
boys on veritable bread and meat. The piano
and lace frame are good in their places. and so
are ribbons, frills and tinseIs, but you cannot
make dinner of the former nor a bed-blanket of
the latter. And awful as the idea may seem to
you, both dinner and bcd-blanket are essential
to domestic happiness. Life has its realities as
well as fances; but you make it all matter
of decoration, remembering the tassels and cur
tains, but forgetting the bedstead. Suppose a
man of good sense, and, of course, Of good pros
poets, to be looking for wife, what chance
have you to be chosen? You may cap him, or
you may trap him, or catch him, but how much
better to make it an object for him to catch
you. Render yourself worth catching, and you
will need no shrewd mother or brothers to help
you find market"
A distinguished writer says There is but
one passage in the Bible where the girls are
commanded to kiss the men, and that is the
Golden Rule Whatsoever ye would that men
should do unto you, do ye even so unto them"
A quaint old gent, who is withal one of our
most active, stirring men, had a man at work
in his garden who was quite the reverse. Mr..
JONES'" said he to him one morning, 'did you
ever see snail p Certainly" said jones'
Then" said the old boy, "you must have met
him, for you never could overtake him.
ANOTHER COLLISION CAsE-ALMOsT The
Passenger trains Of the Michigan Southern and
Central Roads on their way in evening before
last, met at that same fatal crossing. The
Southern put on the brakes and stopped, so a
collision was avoided. The Southern road has
now issued orders to the Conductors and Engi-
neers of all trains, to come to dead stop at
the crossings. We hope to hear of like order
from the Michigan Central to-day.-Chteago
Tribune.
In an amount of sl,5OO despatched from this
city to Ireland, averaging contribution OF $50
per man, not over $50 of the sum named was
sent by persons of drinking habits. The state
ment carries moral with it by which many
NAV profit, viz: a drunken man has nothing to
give either to friend at home or abroad
Wheeling Times.
We find in the Syracuse Star tolerably rich
thing. In the State of Ohio there resided
family consisting of an old man by the name of
Beaver and his three sons, all of whom are hard
-bo bod offo lon< xboI - kbo