Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1853-05-05

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nc1ical studies. applied 10 an old gentleman
tsknor whether BIS neighbsrhoOd would be
an eIieiSle situation for physician. Why
replied the cid man, what can yen do
WHY, sir, can feel pulse and discover
frsn Il what disease the patient is subject
q.
Here, then. feel mine said the old man,
stretching out his arm.
yen are troubled With the headache said
che physician. after very sagscious lock.
Never had il in my life sir said the old
gentleman.
This vas poser. "A profound silence
snsued
4 suppose you think me a fool said the
physician, retiring
tAh, yeu know what ] think, but you
don't know What feel
K1r In old Vermont, SEINE time past,
liysd queer old man named Fuller. He
had lost part Of his palate and was rare
specimen. He owned q mill, the water TO
which was brought for some way through
wooden fume. One morning an apprentice
Informed him that tho fume was full Of
suckefs. FuIler posted himself at tsmouth,
placing against il large basket to catch
I the suckers in, while the boy went to the
other cndlte hoist the gate. There came a
crush Of many waters" carrying Fuller and
basket over the overshet wheel and thirty
fact below. All dripping, and scrambling
out, SCATTERING, ayoa may think am an old
idiot, but / amt qdite such dar61d fool
thatI can't SEQ through that joke
II advise you net to get married, said
middle aged man to one that was about to
be married .For,ff you want to be happy.
let the women alone; / was married about
ten years, and saw but two happy days dur
ing that tims-onc was when got my wife,
and the ether whenshe died.
Don't care fer that, said the other, Il
mean e hare one happy day then, at any
rate
HAn freshman lest his hat in a we'll,
and was lot down ID a bucket TO- recover it.
The we'll being extremely deep, his courage
failed him before be reached the water. In
vain did be call to those above him they
lsns deaf sar 10 all he sAid, all :. lAst quits
il despait, he beloved out, 'BeSt Patrick,
IL you don't be afther drawing me up, sure
re cut he rope
M Dr. Young, Of Birmington, having
ons~day forgotteDSto bury the corpse Of n
disssntet, vas accused Of ncglectihg the flu.
nsrallin eensequence Of the creed professed
by the departed.
Il have heard, friend II Dung, said Qua
her, to tie reverend gentleman, that thor
would'st ret bury Mr.. -, because he was
Of the dissenters.
you are misinformcd,' replied the doctor,
q should like to bury them all
M Al good old lady was asked what bu-
1siness her husband fsAowed before they
we're married what business y said she,
aWAy he was sailor A sailor p respon-
dsd the inquirer, Yes, SAILOR, said the
coed LADY, she rotcef a boat across tie Her
rimack Riper more than dozen times
yearr
10 a husband and wife, travelling
through the woods in haste, met with mel.
aneholy accident, which is recorded in the
following felieitsus strain
And while re,resting through the woods,
Add through the tangled fern,
He tore bis mustn't mention ems,
And had to put on hern.
M A correspondent Of the Spirit Of the
Times says, he saw coekney tother day,
who after dilating upon the superiority Of
EnsHsh over our poultry, said that he was
shastpnisbsd ha. the DISQUALIFICATION Of
hignbranos displayed by the Hamerican
people in the raising Of ems
nF A little boy asked bis mother how
many gods there we're
AJsunger brother answered.
why, one, to Be sure
'Bht how do you know thata inquired
the CHER
Because, answered the younger, God
flls every place, SO there is no room fer any
other.
Hf TON, vets monomany n
why, you see, Dick, when poor fellow
steals, It's called larceny ! but when it's
rich I'm, the jury says it's smonomany,' and
thsy ean't 'elP Il, that's It, -..
- 1learned young lady, the other e.
vsning, astonished company by asking for
shs lean Of diminutive, argenteous, trunca.
led cone, convex on its summit. and semi
peEfsratea With Symmetrical indentations.p
She wanted thimble.
~ Show rs nice, yirtuous. resy-cheek. |
q. eAeFry-lipped young maiden, and we viii |
sasu you the tallest kind Of making love-
There e something 50 cnticing. 50 entrauc:
ing ~ the feminine gender. that We are Il,
rsslstibly led to love the fascinating ores.
snrssa any hsw. Its So
- Caa : man be considered a loose
ningl wv
WIN ssus Of cur uunerehs friend. olae;
date1 The question Is ahead Of our inc
Z - Men dying, make their wiils-bul
Escape : word g sad
Why shsuld they make uhal ali ,be;, l;...
The gentle danes htys had avs
~ Al elegy in p.per, upop !, Ii
.Ie1y Nhs had besn thrice married. sad lse
thirteen ckildren, begins 's''
.Adisus sweet maid
~ a man vent hon, tbs o,her ev..;..
n14 fs1ld : nsW AID somsuhat Original :
taeAne.l % biz vifsss piano Il was nut ~
n 10 Sheriff
- Eyes are The electric telegraph of
ne ke.rt, they vii Send : message a1T a..
$3.50. . langs.ge enly kns1n e tie two
1ir|1 uko eorrespold
~ a Isty given y i.tils says she new,
81 a1lt1ing olly 70 txs classes Of pso6,}s
~-t1s1e Eht al, and those uht ds6t
That's the end Of ny tall a a. |
Ilr1'l nd Vim b TUNED d ) freq !