New Orleans daily crescent. [volume] ([New Orleans, La.]) 1851-1866, 1853-05-16

4 "A uallatln street poIltlclan, lmbiblng small
beer, lunching when invited, and pronouncin
glowing eulogies on yourself and all democrati
creation.
CHARACTER AND QUALIFICATIONS.
My friend Peter Mc5regory (who has neve
asked more than $500 for his valuable aid t.
our party shall satisfy you by the following
| I, Peter McGregory, hereby certify upon m,
word of honor as gentleman, that well know
John Brown-that his character is as good as i
ought to be--that it was he who put in twent,
nice votes ION the sly, and with no unneeessar,
J delay in waiting for citizenship for HILBERT
} that there is no danger of his character bein,
injured by anything, present or to come; tina
he cannot be bought for any unreasonable o
insignificant consideration; and that he is de
cidedly in favor of the party in power, an
always has been. l further certify, in the mat
ter Of QUALIFICATIONS, that he can do as mucl
as the majority of applicants for office can, viz
sign his name legibly to the i.onthly pay roll
| Duly sworn to, by my honor as a gentleman
May 10th, 1858, (Anno Domini, not Anti Demo
| crat) PETER MCGREGORY
The above, l hope, will be entirelySatisfactory
l must frankly state that l have found tn
larger number of landladies obnoxious to my sen
sitiye feelings as a gentleman, and rather dis
posed to annoy me about small pecuniary mat
tiers, which your appointment of me will, my
dear and Hon. Sir, enable me to quidate-ulti
mately. My last landlady for some time faithful
ly obeyed the Scriptural injunction to sc Watcl
and pray" wide documents), but has unfortu.
nately lost grace by losing her temper and, sud
denly and in the most impolite manner, dismiss
ing me from her house. She thought she had
(poor, misguided soul y watched me and prayed
for funds long enough.
Now, how to answer the question of s'resi
dence" puzzles me- Residence - implies some.
thing permanent, place to which man may &c
back and sit down again, whenever he chooses
| am too progressive to remain long in one place
and being of the fast &c Young America" order,
object to everything standing, except standing
accounts. | make it a rule Il made rules, like
yourself, for my governmental, metime since) to
keep ahead of my landladies and their accounts
At present, | reside promiscuously among my
accommodating friends, who are scattered all
over town, and to the care of any Of whom you
can address me a letter. | breakfast dine and
sup at the Shades, st. Louis, Veranda, St
Charles, City Hotel, Gem, or Woods, according
to the appearance of things or persons, at IL,
A. NJ, of every day Some nights, when no
friend is convenient or inviting, having fancy
for observation, l quietly perambulate the
streets. and could, therefore, afford you much
local information of curious character.
CITY, DISTRICT AND STREET.
All over the city--confned to no &c district"
because metropolitan; and in no particular
street, because, Mr.. Hon. s. w Downs, 1, indie
pendently advise you as friend, that you might
engage in some larger, better, more decent, re-
spectacle. and gentlemanly business, than
hunting up my number on street, to
poke your handsomely sharpened and elongated
nose into my kitchen, chuckle my kitchen SER
wants under the chin, pump my family secrets
out of their good humored confidence, learn
whether had chop or steak for breakfast, ask
if had paid my baker and butcher, etc. Come,
Mr.. Hon. S. W. Downs, |, John Brown, think
you may be clever enough to be Collector and
give me an office, but l do not think you have
my particular business to know exactly where
people live, unless, like some scantily clothed
country schoolmaster, you wish to board around,
free, gratis, for nothing If you
'eally want a dinner, have a cousin Ga poor
leyil of a whig) who keeps house, and who will
oan me his establishment for the occasion.
VIII you dine with me the day after you ap-
Joint me- (N.B. 1t is not true, as maliciously
'eported, that sleep without sheets, between
blankets, and wear dickey)
You urge upon applicants not to be " in a
urry." Of course, they should not &c all speak
t once" Note me, and mark how deliberate
am, Why, my dear sir, am the most patient
IAN alive. | will give you an illustration Just
II the fun of the thing, and for a small pecu-
larry consideration, I engaged with the wax
CURE man at Commercial Hall Skupinsky
he Philadelphia murdererl had had his head |
ccidentaly knocked off, and by particular re- |
nest | occupied his place for the balance of the |
Tening. in motionless dignity, and to the great |
eight OF large and intelligent throng of COM
etely humbugged visitors Now, did you ever /
,ar of more extraordinary case of composure
Id patience OF course, you cannot suspect,
ter this explanation, that am " in a hurry"
Your organ says that you have 6 found it ex- |
dient to adopt certain rules for the conven-
nee of all parties" This announcement was
lite unnecessary. You and |, both, know that
u, long since, adopted "certain rules for the
nvenence of all parties" Qrefer to your
lion and Compromise speeches, the nice little
Is you paid for their circulation, to their in
1veniently contradictory antecedents and to
} miserable ingratitude of "a Legislature,
gely wing, in failing to re- elect you to the U S.
late) Certain rules . were not, then,
or the convenience of all parties at least,
wings did not find them convenient OIL
Irse, you will now make a magnificent display
he generosity you and your friends solicited,
keeping some cheaply salaried wings in the
stom- house. And, always, remembering TO
Ike room for |,
Your Most Humble Servant,
and Faithful Friend,
JOIN Brown,
No, on - street,
New Orleans, La.