The Planters' banner. [volume] (Franklin, Attakapas Co., Lou.) 1849-1872, 1853-12-01
From the New York Dutchman.l
Look Out for Mock Auctions.


use the popular phrase among auction
eers, "enormous sacrifices" were be
made, peremptory sales of valuable
household and other goods" wee TO
take place, and all articles mentioned
in the catalogue are to be sold without
reserve to the highest bidder" SC, &c.
And at such times, too, I used no un-
frequently to indulge in purchases,
and iiI.which, | confess, | was often
victimized. Indeed at one period of
my life, it was almost a passion with
mo to attend all tho auction sales that
l conveniently could and invest all the
loose funds in my possession, in the
purchase of articles that | never re-
quired, nor ever afterwards used. In
short, was not at all unlike BILLY
Simpkins, of Connecticut. Billy It's
an sold joke" but rather good) vas
constantly numbering up his premises
with what his good wife used to tenn
trash.
Every week, cart was certain TO
back up before the door. loaded with
dilapidated furniture-old stoves-door-
less and legless-baskets of unmatched
and broken crockery, old picture frames,
chairs, &C., &C., which Billy would IN
form his wife he had bought for tri1e
at auction. AT last the wife got angry
told Billy not to bring another a1c-
ton bought article in the house-if he
did, threatened to send them all back.
Billy didn't heed her-in fact, he
couldn't, he "was SO used to it." He
continued TO attend auctions, and of
course purchase. His house became
so numbered up with trash, that his
wife and family could scarcely move
about; SO what does the old lady do
one day, but load up cart, "full as it
could hold" with the said trash, and off
TO auction sends it, with the exclama-
ton
"There, | guess Pm rid Of some of
the pesky trash i''
But the next day the good lady had
evidence that she was mistaken, for
what did astonish her eyes but cart
backing up to her door, loaded with the
very articles that she had sent to auc-
tion the day previous. Billy had pop
ped in at the auction. and bought them
all up without any knowledge that he
had ever before seen them, much less
owning them! A good joke, wasn't 1t !
Well, as | said before, was at one
time almost as bad as my friend Billy.
Buying goods at auction was almost a
passion with me. But finally recover
ed from it, and to my recovery am in
debted to what once saw in an auc-
ton room.
One day while sauntering down town,
my ears were attracted by the familiar
cry.
"'N a-half! IN a-half! IN a-half!-
Five dollars IN a-haIf! are you all
done 2"
In popped, of course. Just as en-.
tered, a little dapper-looking, trimme ed
and starched up gent, handed me
catalogue, which informed me that
among variety of other things,
"choice collection of oil paintings,
some of which were supposed to be
productions of the old masters, belong
ing 10 a gentleman who was about
leaving the city for Europe, were to be
sold"
Gentlemen" said the auctioneer,
" what's bid for this beautiful rosewood
table? Am offered ten dollars p
TEMP said rather faint voice.
"Ten dollars am only offered. Ten
-twelve-twelve N a-half-'n a-half"
Put up the pictures," suggested
one of the crowd.
"The paintings will be sold al twelve
Twelve and a-half dollars
Is only offered for this beautiful rose
wood table-Twelve N a-half-'n a.
half-and while the auctioneer was
. going on" | took look at the oil
paintings. am a great admirer Of
he fine arts, and flatter myself, some
hing of critic. Therefore | expected
| rare treat when / was ushered into a
back room, where | was told the pic
ures were on exhibition; but | was
sadly disappointed. Instead Of seeing
What expected-a fine collection of
I'D pictures, probably the property of
ome millionaire, who was induced to
,art with them on account of his de-
,arture for Europe, as | inferred from
what the catalogue said-I could dis
over nothing but dozen or SO highly |
:olored landscape and other pictures
With immensely blue skies, green lakes
nd very green hills and pastures-in
gilded frames and two or
hree rather large, defaced and worn
ut pictures, that looked as if they had
one service on pole in front Of some
ountry inn for centuries.
There were several in the room ex-
the rare productions among
be most attentive was a rather fine
boxing, genteelly dressed middle aged
who with gold framed eye
lass was examining minutely one of
he oldest and most Unlocking pictures,
a my estimation, of the whole coIIec-
ion.
A short distance from him-and with
4 hearing-were two other individuals
Tho appeared TO be equally, interested
4 the same picture. They were both
oung men-well dressed, cleanly
haYed, and had "natty appearance. !
ays one of the two, pointing with his
ane to the picture