Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1852-1859, 1853-06-23
ODDITIES.

Pretty THouoHrs.-What is crime2s a wretch
ed vagabond travelling from place to place in
fruitless endeavor TO escape from justice, who is
constantly engaged in ho, pursuit; Toe for virtue
and happiness, though at times the companionof
poor innocence, whichis too often made 10 suffer
for the guilty.
What is thought? A fountain from which
flows all good md evilintentions--a mental anid,
electrical IN the force and rapldity OF movements,
silently flowing unseen within its secret avenue;
yet is the controlling power of all animated ma
tuIe, and the chief handspring oil all our actions
WHAT'S happiness2 A butterfly that roves from
flower to flower in the vast garden OF existence,
and which is eagerly pursued by the vain multi
tude in hope of obtaining the prizes yet il contin-
ually eludes their grasp.
What is fashion2 a beautiful envelope for
mortality, presenting glittering and polished ex-
terror, the appearance of which gives no certa
indication oil the real value OF whatis contained
therein.
What is wit? sparkling beverage that is
highly exhilarating and agreeable when partaken
at the expense of Others; but when used at our
own cost it becomes bitter and unpleasant
What is knowledge? key that unravels all
mysteries, which unlocks the entrance, and dis
covers new, unseen, and untrodden paths in the
hitherto unexplored field of science and litera-
ture.
What is fear9 frightful substance to the re-
ally guilty, but vain and harmless shadow 10 the
conscientious, honest, and upright.
What is Joy? The honey of existence really
beneficial and agreeable when partaken of in
moderation, but highly injurious when used TO ex-
cess.
ANIHAuouRAL SpEEcH.-The Southern Literary
Messenger gives the speech of q Warden of prls-
on or penitentary in the District of Columbia,
who invited his friends to witness his installation
into office. The prisoners having been drawn up
into line, the new Warden delivered himself
Observation-Disclosures No. said he, you're
not gentlemen. Fellow citizens-hem!-Convic
| l have just been appointed by the President oil
these United States, Warden of this Penitentiary.
Now, wish TO say to you, that it is my design TO
have everything conducted here in the most Order
ly manner, and would like you to distinctly un-
derstand that the first rascal of you that makes a
fuss shaH be kicked out Of the establishment-he
shan't stay here at all"
| Quick REPARTEE.-The following anocdote
of Gov. Morris is related by correspondent OF the
N. Y. Tribune:
He had a high respect for Bishop Moore, as man
noted for the purity his character, but not less
for the retiring modesy of his disposition, and the
| general favor in which he was held. AS the story
ran: A dinner was given by some one of Governor
Morris friends when he was about departing fol
Europe. Bishop Moore and his wife were of the
party. Among other things that passed in CONVEX
saion, Mr.. Morris observed that he had made his
will in prospect of going abroad, and, turning &c
Bishop Moore, said to him:
| "My reverend friend, have bequeathed TO you
my whole stock OF impudence."
| Bishop Moore replied:
| .sSir, you are not only very kind, but very gen.
erous; you have left by far the largest portion
| of your estate"
Mrs. Moore Immediately added:
"My dear, you have come into the possession o
your inheritance very soon."
GIRLs.-Holmes in one of his poems, says in {
parenthetical way