davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19
The VentrilCquist'S Goats.

Some years ago there was young man
living in Savannah, by the name of Mich
OILS. He was a clerk in large store
1t happened that a travelling yentriloquist
visited Savannah, and so interested Mich
OILS, that he engaged with him to 60 around
the country together.
In the course of time the young man
eclipsed his master. He displayed most
astonishing powers, and caused great ex-
citement wherever he appeared.
1t was after he became famous and
wealthy, that he visited tailor's shop in
Savannah, to order new coat. The
knight Of the shears was happy to receive
the order from so distinguished custom
er, and assured the ventriloquist that the
garment should be an exact fit.
Now Nichols had remarkable chest.
He could initiate his lungs as to increase
the circumference of his body eleven inch
es.
A week passed, and the humorist wait
ed upon the tailor, in company with a
friend, to take the new coat. Upon put
ting it on, it lacked about foot of CON-
ing together The tailor was thunder
struck. There was the measurment-
the figures his own. How could he have
made such disgraceful blunder! With
numberless apologies, he begged to be al
lowed to measure again, and make a Sec
ond coat.
When it was done, Nichols came in
with his friend again, to see how it would
fit.
The tailor handed the garment to him
remarking that there was no mistake this
time-he would find it a complete fit
Would he? He put it on, and Tapped it
around him like a blanket! 1t was as
much too large as the first was too small.
He tossed it off. The tailor struck his
hand upon his head, and cried, 81 am
out of my senses !" He threw his book
and his shears across the room, and was
about to dash out of the shop, when Mich
OILS said, cOOlly, Here, let me try on the
first coat you made for me-"
The tailor, amazed, handed it to him.
It buttoned exactly over genteel waist.
" And now, suppose | try on the large
coat again"
He did; and it was none too large to
button over his body, which swelled up
like an alderman's.
think" said Nichols, oil take both
of these coats" and he handed some bank
notes to the bewildered tailor, who after
his singular customer had departed, final
ly concluded that he must have measured
over his enormous lungs, inflated to their
utmost, for the second coat, and for the
first one, when his chest was contracted
to its smallest capacity. The tailor, at
the last accounts, was telling the story to
every new customer.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19
THE JEFFERsONEAN.
The Hearts Lament.

BY MRS. A. L. RUTER DUFOUR.
know thou wilt forget me,
For that proud soul of thine
Turns coldly from the passionate
And ardent love of mine.
1t may be that thou deemestit
A light and simple thing
To strike with bold and nervous arm
The hearts lone, mystic string.
Thou wilt not deign to hear the strain
Thy own dear hand hath woke,
1t matters not, if ne'er TO thee
Its trembling echoes broke.
/ know, ay well, thou wilt forget
ever dreamed of thee,
Thou lowest not, thou carest not
My fettered soul to free.
The gay and gifted crowd thee round,
The beautiful are thine,
Then how canst thou, oh lofty one,
Kneel at lowly shrine!
ask it not; oh never more
My souls cry shalt thou hear
My heart shall learn in betterness
To hide its love so dear.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19
VOL. Is.
Published by Theodore Schoch.

TERMS-Two dollars per annnum In advance-Two
dollars and quarter, half yearyand If not paId be-
fore the end of the year Two dollars and half Those
who receive their papers by carrier stage drivers
employed by the proprietor, viii be charged 81 -
ee ntS, per year, extra.
No papers ditconnued until all arrearages are paid
except at the option OF the Editor.
~ Advertisements not exceeding one square (slX-
teen inesl will be inserted three weeks for one dollar
and twenty cents for every subsequent insertion
The Charge for one and three insertions the SAME
A liberal discount made TO yearly advertisers
p Allletters addressed to the Editor must be post
ppd.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

1t is said tEat if you gently tickle
bull frog on the back of the head with
feather, he vii! sit and cry ike child.
1t is stated that Horace Greely, of thg
New York Tribune, has recently paid be-
tween 500 and $780, principal and COM
pound interest Of a debt Of less than 500,
which his poor father owed when be died
as Amherst many years ago,
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

EG~ A husband and wife, travelling
through the woods in haste, met with a
melancholy accident which is recorded in
the following felicitous strain:
And while retreating through the woods,
And through the tangled fern,
He tore his muslin 't-mention- ems,
And had to put on hern!
OEJ-Cato Smith, aged 70 years, the veal
thiest colored man in Chester county, Pa,
committed suicide few days ago; $1,000
were foude in his pocket
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19
AN ORIENTAL PARADISE.

AN ORIENTAL PARADISE.
A Persian heaven is easy made,
IT'S but black eyes and Lemonade.
Boston Transcript.
A CELESTIAL PARADISE.
A Chinese heaven, of course, would be
A heap of fat and cup of tea.
Lynn News.
AN ENGLISH PARADISE.
An Englishman's heaven would be, in chief
A rosy cheek and piece Of beef
Vor Populi.
YANKEES PARADISE.
A Yankee heaven is different life,
4 soft pine board and sharp jack-knife.
Sunday Morning Nems.
AN AMERICAN PARADISE.
The Yankees place of heaven and rest,
Is found little further West.
(LOndon Times.
4 DUTCHMANs PARADISE.
The heaven of hans, without doubt,
Hath walls and floors of sour-krout.
AN IRIsHMAN's PARADISE.
Where's heaven for Pat but in the tater,
In Biddy, piggy and the cratur!
(Schenectady Reflector.
A PRINTERS PARADISE.
The Printers heaven is a very queer place
No hetI-no pi-.fat matter, = EN- brace.
Louisville Democrat
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A rural visitor, describing the many
strange and wonderful things he saw in
New York, winds up by saying: =" We
saw the Astor House, the Metropolitan,
and other hotels, and were troubled to
know where the money came from to build
them; we paid our bills, and felt relieved
on that point"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A Negroes Prayer.-An old negro, return
ing one night from dancing frolic, when
crossing the river, lost both oars. and came
near being swamped. Determined to DO
what he had never done before, he dropped
on his knees and exclaimed, ooh MasSa, Lord
if eber gwine to help old Ira, now is de time
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

Old DR.. Hunter used to say, when he could
not discover the cause of a mans sickness,
" Wen try this, and Wen try that. Well
shoot into the tree, and if any thing falls,
well and good" "Aye," replied Nag, 81
fear this is too commonly the case, and in
your shooting into the tree, the frs! thing
that generally falls, is the patient"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A sentimental chap IN Rhode Island
intends to petition Congress, at its next
session, for an appropriation to improve
the channels of affection, SO that hence
forth the course of true love may run
smooth
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

"PATCH UPON PATCH."-We find the
following complicated piece Of patchwork
in the last number Of TIE Prairie d5e
CHien Courier =
"MARR1ED.-At Patch Grove, on the
24th ult., by Daniel Andrews, Esq. Mr.:
Reed Patch to Miss Harriet NJ Patch, all
of Patch Grove"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

An old paper has this, " \ very devoUt
fellow, not being able to please bis nice
piety in his prayers, used only TO repeat
the alphabet, and then add, 'Oh Lord
God put these letters into words, and
these words into sentences; that they
may be for my real good
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

An avaricious person, vino keptp very
scanty table, dining one Saturday with his
son at an ordinary in Cambridge, whispered
in his ear" Tom, you must eatfor TO-DAY and
Tomorrow" 90 yes" retorted the half
starved lad, "But ha'nt eaten for yesterday
and the day before yet, father"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

4 Neag de,inkb.-An odd genius as
cribed the very cold weather #e had win
ter before last to the fact that Sir John
Franklin went through the Northwest
Passage and forgot to shut the door af-
ter him.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

Here is a demonstration of the goa
head-ativeness Of this age =
MABRIED-In Canton, Maine Februa-
ry 20, by E. G. Harlow, Esq, after
courtship of eighteen minutes, Calvin Sim
mons, Esq, to Miss Cynthia G. West all
of Canton.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

are not so meritorious, The last number OF
Zion's Herald contains the following new
version entitled
The BleSt Ones at Home.
Away on the banks of lIfe'S bright river,
Far, far away
There will my heart be turning ever,
There's where the blest ones stay;
All through this vale of sin and sorrow
Sadly roam,
Still longing for the dawn of the morrow
And for the blest ones at home.
All without is dark and dreary,
Every where | roam,
o, brothers. how the heart grows weary,
Signing for the blest ones at home.
Through all earth's sunny scenes l wandered
In youths gay morn;
How many precious hours I've squandered,
How many mercies scorned,
When seeking sins delusive pleasures,
Wretched was l,
But now my heart has found treasure
There with the blest ones on high.
All without is dark, &c.
One hour there is forever bringing
Memories of love;
Twas when my sighs were changed to singing
OF the blest home above;
When shall see my Saviour reigning
On his white throne!
When will be hushed my hearts complaining
There with the best ones at home!
All till then is dark and dreary
Every where | roam,
o, brothers, how the heart grows weary
Longing for the blest ones at home.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A mountain Of marble has been discovered
in the great Salt Lake Valley, of almost eve.
~ color, containing slabs Of every size.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

The area drained by the Mississippi
River, is about ,226,OOO miles.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A young clergyman having the misfortune
to bury five wives, being in company with a
number ofladies, was severely rallied by them
upon the circumstance. At last one of them
rather impertinently put the question to him,
How he managed to have such good luck.
Why, Madam says the other, knew
they could not lire without contradiction,
therefore let them go Their own way
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A native ofIiibernia, relating to his friend
the dangers and difficulties he had undergone
both by sea and land, speaks thus to him
with great seriousness:-l believe in my soul
John, that l have suffered every thing that
man fears but death; and expect, if shall
live, to suffer that also.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

At tea-party, where some Cantabs hap
pened TO be present, after the dish had been
handed round, the lady, who was presiding
over the tea equipage, 'hoped the tea was
good Very good, indeed, madam was the
general reply, till it came to the turn of one
of the Cantabs to speak, who between truth
and politeness, shrewdly observed-'That the
tea is eGcelLent, but the uqter is smoky.'
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

Baldus, very eminent lawyer of the 14th
century, and Menochius, who wrote on legal
in the 10Th century, both lay it
down as clear law, that ."ifi it be proved that
a certain mans head has been cut off, vio-
lent presumption will follow from thence,
that that man IS Dead"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

At the siege Of Yorktown, two blacks were
placed as sentinels together. When the re-
lief came, the corporal found both in the same
position he left them: on demanding of the
one sitting why he did notrise, he answered,
{" believe Massa, Use wounded, and guess
Cuffee dead; hant poke dis good while" On
examination Cuffee was really dead; and Sam
bo had the bones of his arm and leg SO badly
fractured as to render amputation absolutely
necessary. When the poor fellow was in
formed Of it, he replied, "Well Massa, take
um Off" After the operation was performed
the surgeons began TO condole with him upon
his misfortune, when he exckimed, "Neber
mind, Massa, tank God, got noder leg and
noder arm for um yet"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

Two men, in dispute, redected upon each
others veracity One of them replied, that
he was never whipt but once by his father,
and that was for telling the truth. believe
then (retorted the other) "the truth was
whipt out of you. for you never have spoken
it since"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A Clergyman who is in the habit etpreach-
ing in different parts of the country, was not
long since at an inn, where he observed a
horse Jockey trying to take in simple gen.
tleman, by imposing upon him broken wlnded
horse for a sound one. The Parson knew the
bad character of the Jockey, and taxing the
gentleman aside told him to be cautious OF
the person he was dealing with. Inc gen.
tleman finally declined the purchase and the
Jockey, quite nettled, observed-'FarSon' 1
had much rather hear you PREACH than see
you privately interfere in bargains between
man and man, in this way 'Well, FePlled
the Parson) if you had been where you ought
have been, last Sunday, you might have heard
me preach Where was that, inquired the
Jockey. In the State Prison, returned the
clergyman.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A scotchman in New-Hampshlre being
sick, was called upon by clergyman, who
conversed with him upon his religious con-
Germs. Said the minister, DO you repent of
all your sins7 Do you repent of Adams first
SIM! 'Adom' Adom!' said the sick scotch
man, d never knew the m0h'
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

AN EDITORS PARADISE.
4 home that's void Of every evil,
With regular mails and a smiling ID
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

The Duke of Orleans when Regent of
France, was solicited by severel noblemen to
pardon a man who had been convicted of
murder, and who had been pardoned for COM
mitting two other offences, replied, | will
pardon him, at your request but take notice,
and keep this in your memory, that l will
certainly pardon the mun, whoever he may
be, that kills either Of yoa"
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

Cards, Circulars, Bill Heads, Notes Blank Receipts
Justices Legal and other Blanks, Pamphlets. &c
printed with neatnesS and despatch, on reasonable
terms,
At THE OEFTCF OF
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A Persian heaven is easy made,
IT'S but black eyes and Lemonade.
Boston Transcript.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19
JOB PRINTING.
FANCY PRIIYIPTIT9,

Having general assortment of large. elegant plain
and ornamental Type, we are prepared
to execute every descriptlono
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

GTThe melody Old Folks at Home,
has become very popular, but the words
are not so meritorious. The last number Of
Zion's Herald contains the following new
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

The Printers heaven is very queer place,
No heA-no pi-.fat matter, 2 EN- brace.
Louisville Democrat.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19

A Chinese heaven, of course, would be
a heap of fat and a cup of tea.
Lynn NewS.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, 1853-05-19
AN ENGLISH PARADISE.

An Englishman's heaven would be, in chief
A rosy cheek and piece Of beef
VOr POpuk.
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10

II The New Orleans correspondent Of
the Nashville Union, relates the follow.
characteristic anecdote of Lola Non,ez,
who is now turning the hearts of the
gallant denizens of the Southern metrop-
oils:
While she was at Charlesto tou a "Cod.
6shy' Planter not loathing like Byron
that slow vice curiosity" desired to visit
her. Ten o'clock the following morn.
ing was SET apart for his reception and
surprise! Lola at that hour sat semi dis.
abille in her drawing room--her legs
cooked upon the centre table beside a
glass Of bsandy-ochat; clenched by her
pearly teeth, between two rosy lips was
a genuine Havana-in Danseuse "medit-
alton fancy free," no doubt thinking OF
her first step in life's ladder. while the
fagrant blne smoke was puffed away in
wrea,hs, curling to the ceiling-just then
the Planter was announced. Confident
ly and anxiously he advanced a Few
steps-Lola gave him look-and asked
do you see me sir!
Phnter-Yes! yes s-hem!
Lola We'll, then! You have seen the
Elephant and can GO!
The Planter drew back in surprise and
vamoused sansceremony with less
"noise' than confusion"
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10
$500 PER ANNUM, In ADVANCE.

CUR, drawing knife, chisel, gimblet, spade.
&c.-with a few nails. | have but one
more piece of advice to give, in this
article to future immigrants, and that is
TO start early! Whatever else YOU do,
or omit to do, do, not fail to heed this
advice. If you start early you will be
quite sure to get through, though you
should have much i'll luck. But if you
start late you will have i'll luck, and per.
haps not set through at all! or if you do.
without your stock--your teams and
wagons--dessitute, detected; sick, worn
out and discouraged! And in this con.
di.ion you will be forced to seek home,
employ ment and bread, in a new coun.
try and land of strangers! If, there.
fore, you can cross the Missouri river as
early as The middle of April. do SO. Ii
you cannot cross before the middle of
May do not come at all. But go into
one Of the cabins, iC the vicinity of
kanesville, recently deserted by the
Mormons, and go 10 work and raise
crop. You will then be on hand TO start
with fresh teams, early in the spring
BE assured that the journey is too long
TO be made in one season, unless i, be
commenced very early in the season.
In the meantime, those who read what
have written, may be anxious to know
how aT pleased with Oregon. For
the qualification Of all such | will here
simply add that | do not, as yet, regre,
starting to Oregon. am at present sat
istied that came. How the case may
stand with me years hence, cannot, of
course, now tell. But perceive no rea
son now 10 induce the supposilion that
shall ever regret having come to this new
Pacific home.
But can exclaim, with thousands,
tha, had the overland journey to this
country again to perform, should know
hoW to come! As very much depends
upon The possession Of this knowledge,
have no other motive than the good of
those who may succeed me, in underta-
king to write upon this subJSc,.
| am truly
Your friend,
#.E DELAZON SMITH.
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10
DR.. j. Williamson,

"AVING PERMANENTLY located IN Ot-
Ii tumwa, would respectfully tender
his professional services to the Town and
vicinity.
Having the advantages of full collegi-
ate education in all the departments OF
Medicine, and some years experience in
practice, he hopes to prove himself worthy
Of liberal patronage.
Office and residence on Main Street, one
door above the old post-office stand
Jan. 18th, lS53.yl
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10

Love OF THE observation-disclosures
have much nicsr sense of the beauti
ful than men. They are by far the sa
fer umpires in matters of propriety and
grace. A mere schoolgirl will be think,
ing and writing about the beauty of birds
and flowers, while her brother is rob
bing the nests and destroying the flow.
ers. Herein is great natural law. the
sexes have each their relative excellen-
cies and DEFICIENCIES, in the harmonious
nnion Of which lies all the wealth OF do.
mestic happiness.
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10
Knic XIX nae ks.


Ever ranging, constant changing.
Sometimes pleasing, sometimes teasing,
Sometimes coaxing, sometimes hoaxing,
No expressing how much distressing,
Little knowing. little sewing,
Little walking, greatly talking,
Mischief making, promise breaking,
Duty shirking, hating working,
Novel reading, dainty feeding.
Idle dreaming, sudden screaming,
Lap-dos doating, Byron quoting,
Piano playing. gems displaying,
Body bracing, tightly lacing,
Over sleeping, often weeping,
Dandy loving, white kid glowing,
Ever sighing, almost dying
What blessed wives to cheer mems lives!
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10
MEDICAL NOTICE.

Y,HE UNDERSIGNED takes this meth
i cd Of informing the citizens OF Ottum-
wa and vicinity that he has located himself
permanently and will practice in all the va
rioss branches of medicine. He solicits a
share Of public patronage, and hopes by
his long experience to give entire satlsfac-
tion to those ,who may employ him. BY
unremitting study and attention to this
great science he. hopes to render himself
useful to the community in which n re-
sides. Office at the Drug Store.
A. ID. v. HUEVAL, M. ID.
Ottumwa, March q, lS52.n
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10
MISCELLANY.
From the Muscatine Journal.
TO E.-..-..

oh! tell me not of the future bright,
That yet shall be happy and gay,
For now my soul is dark as night,
Within no cheering ray:
Then say not there's joy in store
For me--ah, no! never more!
For life to me is weary dream,
Fraught with sadness and sorrow;
Still no vision does it seem,
For it ends not with the morrow:
Then say not there's joy in store
For me-ah, no! never more!
Then cheer me not with loving smile,
Nor words SO gently spoken;
Smiles and words cannot beguile
My heart so sadly broken:
Then say not there's JOY in store
For me--ah, no. never more!
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10

~A Yankee has invented new
and cheap plan for boarding. One of the
boarders mesmerizes the rest and then
eats hearty meal, the mesmerized be-
ing satisfied from sympathy.
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10

S"Massa says you must sartin pay
the bill to-day" said negro TO New
Orleans shop keeper.
"Why, he isn't afraid I'm going to run
away, is he!" was The reply.
Not 'zac.ly dat; but look here" said
the daskey, slyly and mysleriously.
'Ee's gwine to run away himself, and
darefore he wants to make a big raise.
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10
j. ID. Devin,
Il TORNE EY AT La w /.
OTTUMwA, IOWA.

UTfUMWAs IUWAs
nv I'LL practice in the Courts Of the
w River counties and in the Sapreme
Court.
Having the appointment of NorARY Pun
Lie, he will always be supplied with Blank
Deeds, Mortgages, Deeds of Trust, &C.,
and give prompt attention to CoEvEYAa-
clHG, EXAMINATION OF TITLES, &c.
Particular attention given to securing
and collecting debts. SALE and LOCATION
Of WARRANTS & PURCHASE and SALE OF
RsAL EsYATz. July 4th 1881.
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10

D'"A new society, says an exchange
paper, ais in process of formation. to be
called the Total Abstinence from Phys
ic Society whose motto is to be Boef,
Water, and Benevolence."
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10

THE REMEDY.-"Oh! Doctor" said
an elderly lady recently TO DIR. h
the celebrated bone-set,er. in describing
the effects of diseased spine, IL can
neither lay nor ses."
"Iu that case," replied he, II should
recommend the propriety of roosiing." |"
Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1853-03-10

DA barber desired a groggy custom.
er of his, one Sunday morning, whose
breath smelt If alcohol "to keep his
mouth shut or the establishment might
get indicted for keeping run, hole open
on SUNDAY.