Weekly national intelligencer. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1841-1869, 1853-07-02
BORES IN SOCIETY.

or al the bores with whom society is afflicted none is
pestilentia than the mantle fellow who is al
not satisfied with being uncomfortable himself but he
seeks to spread shade Of discomfort all around him. If
he would be content TO confne his mutterings and
murings to himself, and maintain strict secuson
he might be pardoned and pted; but when he thrusts
his grievances upon society he then becomes, Dog
berry eoquenty observes, most toerable and be
endured"
The sour is always sour the milk of human kind
in his breast is curded there is in the
acid principle of his composition; nature has given him
qadHt sne Of lemon juice but has forgotten the
charne ingredient lie is from the rising of the sun
the going down of the in sunshine and moonlight
twilight and gas-light When he wakes in the morning
he grumbles because il is time get up his coffee is al
ways hot cold his and steak either over
done underdone he finds nothing satisfactory in the
morning papers he is always the opposition let what
party be in government When he goes out he in
varaby grumbles at the weather if it is little COOL he
calls II Arctic weather If 1t is mild he compares il to the
tropics if il dTzze he declares it rains pchforks and
O gentle breeze is hurricane.
Those who assume a mournful and sad air though they
differ somewhat from the man. are much after the
school, that the weeping philosopher is gene
rally mourning for himself lie will never set out upon
journey without first terrifying himself by bringing
mind all the horrible steamboat accidents aud
tragedies and dismal robberes and murders of travellers
that have occurred within the last half century He will
thus be prepared "sup full of horrors the road"
when the engine whistles approaching crossing he
will Immediately feel certain of coming collision and
will screw his body into all Of impossible shapes
to meet; while the ordinary signal of the engineers bell
on board the boat will instantly suggest the explosion Of
the boiler and the destruction Of all the passengers The
porter who takes his capebog will bear the aspect Of
highway robber and the pretty waiting maid at the hotel
she hands him his sugar for the coffee will be taken
Lucrea Borga in disguise, serving him with alopahic
doses Of arsenic corrosive sublimate
The laughing philosopher is the very antipodes of both
Of the specimens referred to- He enjoys every thing
he goes along he makes fun Of every little mistake he
encounters on fe's pilgrimage and tumble in a stage-
COACH or slip from rail- regarded q matter Of
course lis how Of spirits sackens till the tide Of
life has ceased to ebb hence he always appears years
younger han he actually IS. His hair never turns gray
at least to do his step never loses its
elasticity he trips through life gaily and unconcern-
eddy as he walks through quadre and succeeds not
only in making himself but every around him happy
and the pursuit happiness is the main object Of life
his philosophy, beyond doubt, is the only true one
/" They pass best the world" said Queen Elizabeth
who trip over il quickly for it is but bog-f we STOP
We sink lh-G tsasoa's PictoriaL