Grand River times. [volume] (Grand Haven, Mich.) 1851-18??, 1853-03-16


Second: A retiring position, a delicate
shrinking from contact with the coarse and un-
sympathizng world, an exclusive indifference to
all without the sacred circle ofthe domestic nest.
On the contrary, find you gadding among the
other hens of the yard, making appointments,
sending invitations Again Task of you, madam,
is this true henhood? a5n
"Third Freedom from curiosity a true hen
never evinces the slightest interest in the affairs
of her neighbors, scarcely in her own; she new
er inquiries concerning the whereabouts or ac-
tons of her husband, being perfectly assured
that, wherever he be- and however appearances
at the time may seem to tell against him, he is
ever acting with view to the welfare of the do
mestic nest.
"On the contrary, what do find to be the
truth, in regard to yourself? Not a rooster
raises his voice within half mile of the yard,
but you are able to name him. not hen lays
an egg, but you begin to cacke."
Mrs. Biddy, (meekIy.) Tue laid an egg !!
cut, cut. cut, cut, cut-a-a-a-a. No, mean-yes,
sir, we've laid an egg"
0. c., Esq, with solemn animation.) You're
laid an egg! And pray, where is the thing !'-
Walks briskly to the nest, and takes a micro
scopic view of the object.]
Biddy. "Cut cut mean, will it do sir 2"
o. c., Esq, "Humph-well, yes; very fair,
considering though, now look more closely,
| perceive that it is not precisely shaped TOO
IL ebo al e.; eLoJ
of, by any means. And what do you mean mad
am, by having the thing so much larger at one
end than the other? Where, ask, is your idea
of symmetry Zounds madam, if this is the
best you can do in that department, shall lay
the next myself"
Biddy, with her claw in her eye) "Please, /
couldn't help it, didn't mean to-"
o. C., Esq, (molfed) "Wel, well don't fret
your gizzard. You're no chicken, madam, to be
so sensitive about trfe; only remember my
advice in future, and, above ALL recollect that
the crowning virtue of henhood is disinterested-
ness.
Mrs. Biddy, (meckly) "Have worm, dear!"
O. C. Esq, (solemnly) 81 WILL"
SCENE THIRD.
Mrs. Biddy e. has been setting for three
weeks. o. c., Esq, appears in the distance,
parting with one of his numerous female friends;
the tones of his voice fall family on Mrs. Biddys
ear.
o. c., Esq, And now, sweetest of hens fare
well and may all the stars of heaven, and all
the saints of the barn-yard, meet to register the
day when your smile first dawned upon my drea-
ry life, and made me the happiest of roosters.-
Farewell"
o. c., wends his homeward way. "Good eve-
ming, Jack; monstrous fine hen, that. Just been
parting from her. Or, may be you did not no.
tice her points. Quite fond of me, too, assure
you. Still in tears, you will observc--ahem
Cock-a-doodle-doo!"
o. c. reaches the domestic nest
Mrs. Biddy, (feebly) "Oh, I'm so glad to
have somebody to speak to. haven't stepped
off the nest, nor seen creature. since sunrise
How do you do, my dear? Anything new going
on in the yard?"
A long pause, o. c., Esq, appears to be sud-
denly overwhelmed with depression and silent
gloom.
Mrs. Biddy. "What's the matter, sir?'
&C. Esq, Gin terrible voice, and walking
like Othello) "Matter! madam, behold" T In.
serts his bill under his left wing, and produces
ROSTERS tail feather. Do you recognise that
madam? "Do you acknowledge an acquaint
ance with the chieken-hearted caitiff who drop
ped it?" Are you aware that found it within
three feet of the domestic nest 2"
Mrs. Biddy, (languidy) "Did you! didn'
notice it."
&C, Esq, "Peace, hen, ard listen while ir
calm but decisive terms strive to impress up
on your mind the enormity of your conduct
Has it not been decided, ask you, calmly, mad
am, has it not been the opinion of rooster-kint
for ages, and is it not therefore undeniabe, thai
(after disinterestedness) the one thing needfu
to the female character is excessive modesty 3
A true hen is so strictly and severely virtuous
that the slightest attempt at intimacy from one
Of an improper sex, though disguised beneath
the specious mask of friendship, will excite il
her breast the EXTREMIST aversion and horror
| On the contrarv what do find TO be the case