Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1853-04-09
MlseeIIameouo sfsatter.
MATRIMONY;
OR A BACHELOR IN A DILEMMA.

A correspondent, who describes himself
as can Old Bachelor" and who appears TO
be somewhat nervous on the subject ofMAT-
RIMoNY, aSkes for few hints or Suggts ions
in relation to courtship. He says that he
desires TO change his condition, but that be
has SO long lived life OF single blessednesS,
that he feels awkward and uncomfortable in
the society OF ladies, and is constantly ap-
prehensive lest he should commit some mis-
take. He has dicovered, moreover, that he
has made one sad error, in having post poned
the most important act of his life till so late
a perod-for he now perceves that the
chances dre decidedly against him. In
other words, he is puzzled to distinguish
the real from the artificial, and isannoyed,
lest in his efforts TO obtain wife at his time
Of life, he shall secure the hand but not the
hear-or that the marriage on the part OF
the lady shall be one of convenience, and
with the object Of obtaining an establish
ment, rather than one OF feeling or affection.
Our correspondent is evidently in diem
ma. His case, moreover, is by no means
rare ; it is one Of many Of like character.
He describes himself as in the neighborhood
of fifty, and yet not more than forty five by
appearance, or in comparison with men
generally OF that age. Nevertheless he
hopes or expects TO get a wife who "is
twenty or thereabouts"- quote his own
language. This seems TO US a very extrav-
agant expectation, and one that is neither
sensible nor natural. Let the case be rever-
sed, and our bachelor will at once see his
true position. He desires young lady OF
twenty to marry man OF fifty, or one
who is thirty yeats her senior! Now let
us suppose that he were twenty, and that a
lady-love Of fifty should present herself -
What would be his indignation True,
there may he some disparity, and in favor
OF the former, but il should not be beyond
ten years at the utmost. The laws of nature,
as well as of good taste, revolt at farther
difference, and matches that exhibit great
er, are seldom harmonious or happy.
No wonder that our correspondent find,
it difficult 10 get along with the gentler SEX
with such views and expectations TO regu-
late his conduct. No wonder that he oc.
casionally finds younger society preferred
to his, although he may possess advantages
Of position and wealth. There are merce-
nary parents who are willing to sacrifice
their children upon the alter of Mammon
and who regard any match as good one
that secures nourishng establishment, M
matter what the relative ages OF the parte
but alas for the victim wife. Alas fo
the young creature who is bound for life Il
an old man, comparatively speaking, or Il
one who must soon become ole, and who
finding no kindred sympathy or association
in her liege-lord and legal partner, is indu
ced by the necessities Of the case to flute
in the fashionable world, to seek new eX
citements for her thoughts and feelings, an
to be subjected to the most fearful tempta
tions. Early marriages are advisable in tn
: great multitude OF cases, and especiall
where the husband is OF settled character
and actively and prosperouSly engaged i
f some regular occupation. This regularit
of occupation should be the first object {
y every sensible young man, of all, indeed
: who desire 10 maintain an independent pc
sition. Any other policy is franght with
!. thousand vicissitudes. Some formal profe
sion or calling, some regular avocaiion, b
which the time, the thoughts and the enc
gies may be actively and. .proftaby emplo,
: ed, is in country like this, absolutely e
sential TO good character, to correct habit
to social position, and 10 worldly prosperit
And then-matrimony as it seems 10 us,
the next important step. 1t gives us ne
life, fresh existence in the partner of OF
:, choice, and il also imparts a new incenti'
;. to industry an ambition. ]. elevates us
Ct our own esteem, makes us feel that we a
D. responsible, not only for our own destin
but for that of another being, who has CO
fded all that is valuable upon earth, to o
:. care and keeping. II is, it is true, {
= ,e source of anxiety bu! it is also the founta
of many new blessings. How lonely, he
desolate, how petulant in most cases, is
old bachelor Ifpoor, he is too often ne
= lected and deserted-if rich he may be G
. o. Wed, but there is no heart that will look
to and love him-there are no eyes thatw
watch patiently for his comins-there is