The Hillsdale standard. [volume] (Hillsdale, Mich.) 1851-1909, 1853-05-03
THRAsH1Ne THE WRONG MAN.
BY YANKEE sILsBEE.

1anKce pcuers, from time lmmemorial, have
heon famous for "doing others" and being
though in the long run, they may como right
side up, yet once in while the force of cir
cumstances so corners them that they arc o.
bliged to cry peccari!
Il tho course of human events" 10 find a
new style antpodean with the Flood, or CO.
temporary with the time of George Washing
tsn-there happened to be pedler ofthe Old
Bay State, by the name of Ike Jewell, who one
day picked up his traps and started off for the
South, along the line Of the Mississippi, in Or
der to dispense patents for various inventions
from tooth pick to tanning mill. and at
last brought up at the little village of Helena
in the State of Arkansas. Now il happened
that on the very day that Mr.. Jewell arrived in
town, fellow had been arrested for negro ste
alng, and placed in the old log Jail, prepara-
tory to receiving the penalty of fifty lashes for
tho offence. The Jail being insecure, there be-
ing no parole a la horse guards to protect it,
and the prisoner having tinge of Jack Shcp-
pard blood in his veins managed to escape, and
of course few by night after the manner of the
witches in Mcbeth. The consequence, was
that when the sheriff went the next morning,
in all the dignity and pride, TO administer the
punishment, he was surprised and indignant to
find his man non est inrentus!
his lips and looking poignards at the under
sherff-a carroty headed deputy, with pump
kin colored beard of weeks growth "We
must set spies about for him, and have him re-
apprehended.'
Scouts were Immediately dispatched on all
sides, all of whom had seen the man on trial
and knew his face. and as the sheriffs indigni-
ty was hugely "riz," their orders were uncom-
promisingly stringent.
stringent. Now, il happened from some strange
and unfortunate circumstance, that the newly
arrived Yankee peder was the vory image
the regular "Corsicau- u-brother"-the "Samese
Twin Of the fugitive culprit. and as he was
buttering at breakfast the next morning largo
strong man with an official grin, tapped him
gently on the shoulder.
swell" said the Yankee, "whats the row
meow. ehi"
"Want you mister" was the brief reply.
"Yees-due you, want me? s'pose you've
hearn Of my having cum tue teown with my ev-
erlastin' and all-snortin' inventions. You're
wide awake see, for cunning afore any one
else."
"Curse your inventions" said tho official
''The sheriff wants to see you immediately
You thought to escape did vou:"
"Sherif escape! Luke a'here, critter, what
on arth due you mcan?'
"Mean for you tn come along with me with
out another word" And so saying be dragged
the pedler out Of the room.
On the way he learned the circumstances of
the arrest, and though he protested and sworo
that he was not the man. the likeness was too
strong, for belief. The Sheriff advised him for
the good of his country and the honor of his
friends IL he had any not to to tell such dread
ful lies,' but quietly submit TO tho punish
ment."
The consequence was he was tied TO tho
whipping post, and the sperif prepared 20 rem
der in the dreariest mannor. tho inflicton.
"Now. before begin, old fellow" said the
sheriff, what have you got to say for your
self"
"Oh. nothn' in particular" said the peder.
laughing, with a meaning cnrve of his lip
''ony ef you can afford to pay for luxuries, mis-
ter. 20 ahead!
The sheriff, not comprehcnding tho drift of
this business like observation, applied the
scourge, and at every cut. the Yankee laughed
with immoderate glee. Lash succeeded lash
and still he laughed. "and still the wonder
grew" When the fftieth lash had boon well
laid on, as parting salute, tho sheriff in food
of wonderment, threw down the whip, and
asked him the reason OF his Uiirth.
"I am regularly dumbfounded," said hc.--
"What in the devils name makes you laugh
so?"
'Laugh! Why. who could help it? Tn
laughin' teu think how you've been sucked in
on this operaton-T ai,.t the mani"
| lie said this 40 meainingy, that the sheriff be-
gan to think thero must be intake some-
where. The Yankee continued:
SIT strikes me that business in my line is go-
ing tue be rather dull in this town. and If there's
any law tue be had. Ill speculate on this lick
ing and see if l can't turn il to some account.
I'm always open for trade, mister; ii you wish
to compromiso-for remembef, ycr're licked
the prong man"