davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1853-12-17
IMPORTANT FROM MEXICO

Santa Annd Assuming the Imperial Purple.
New Orleans, Dec. IO-The Picayune
learns from private but reliable source,
'ha' everything was prepared in Mexico for
the declaration Of the empire, and that Santa
Anna would assume the title Of .His lmpeti-
al Majesty" on the l2ih Of December.
Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1853-12-17

The Aggregate Salaries of 703 clerks in
Washington, ia said 10 be 1894, 400.
Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1853-12-17
GREAT FIREIN NEW YORK.

The establishment Of Messrs. Harper & Broth.
ers and other Buildings destroycd-Los,
sl,ooO,ooo.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
A country schoolnsster in the neie hbor

country schoolmaster in the neishbor-
hood of Cuckney, the other day, after Civ.
ing one Of his pupils sound drubbing for
speaking bad grammar, sent him to the 9th.
er end of the school room to inform anoth.
er boy that he wished to speak to him ant
at the same time promising to repeat tn.
dose if he spoke TO him ungramma,lcally
the youngster being quite satisfied with
wha. he had got, determined 10 be exact
and thus addressed his fellow pupil:
There is a substantive, of the masculine
gender, singular number, nomitive case, anc
in an angry mood, tha. sits perched upo!
an eminence al the other end of the room
wishes to ar,icua,e few sentences to you in
The present tense"
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

Mr.. Redblossom drank rather more than
his usual allowance Of hot rum and wafer,
one cold night last week j; the consequence
Of which was, he gave his wife rather con-
fused account Of his conduct, on his return
home. ''Yo see, MIR. Smiths grocery store
invited me 10 60 and drink uncle Sam-and
you see, the weather was very dry-apd J
was very sloppy-so | said ! didn't mind
punching one drink-snd i''s queer how my
head wen. into the punch though. The way
home was so dizzy that slipped upon
liuIe dog-lhe corner of the street Bit me
and an cid gentleman with cropped ears and
brass collar on his neck said he belonged
to the dog-you unders'and-ic-,hat is,
don't know nothing more about i,H'
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
.Mechanics, Mrentors and Manu- facturers
$50. IN SPLENDID PRIZES. $50.

.Mechanics, Inrentors and .Manuf ufacturers.
$3.50. IN SPLENDID PRIZES. $3.50.
VOLUME TX Of the SCIENTIFIC AMERIc AN
' commences on the 18th of September. 1t is
chiefly devoted to the advancement of the inter-
ests of .nechantcs InrentorS, .HanutacturerS, and
Farmers, by the diffusion Of useful knowledge up
on these important branches. 1t is edited by men
practically skilled in the arts and sciences, and is
widely regarded as a sound and able Journal
Nearly all the VALUABLE PATENTS which issue
weekly from the PATENT OFFICE are lILUsTRA-
TED WITH ENGRAvINGs, and the CLAIMS of all the
PATENTS are published in its columns thus max
ing the paper perfect SCIENTIFIC AND MEcHANI-
CAL ENCYCLOPEDIA for future as well as present
reference. The SCIENTIFIC AMERICAN is very
extensively circulated-its circulation in the last
Volume exceeding Is, 600 copies per week. 1t is
in form for binding; each volume contains sereral
hundred Engrarings and over four hundred pages of
reading NATTER with an index. The practical re-
ceipts alone are worth to any family much more
than the subscription price.
| The Publishers offer the following valuable
prizes for the largest list of subecrbers sent in by
the 1st January next 500 will be given for the
largest list; SIS for the second $50 for the third
S45 for the fourth; $40 for the 5th; S35 for the
9th; $40 for the 7h; S25 for the 9Th; $40 for the
9th; SIS for the 10th; $40 for the 11th; and s.
| for the 18th. The cash will be paid to the order
of the successful competitor, Immediately after
January lst, 1854.
months, 81; five copies six months, 81; ten copies
six months, 50; ten copies II months, SIS; fifteer
copies twelve months, S22; twenty copies twelve
months, S2S in advance.
Southern and Western money taken for sub
scrptions.
| Letters should be directed, post paid, to MUM
| & Co., Fulton street, N. Y. au25.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

PLAIN PEoPLE.-Plain men, may, even
ugly lllIe fellows. have met with tolerable
success among the fair. Wilkes challenge
TO Lord Townsend is we'll known; "Your
lotdship is one Of the handsomes! men in
the kingdom, and | am the ugliest; yet i've
me but half an hours start, and | will enter
the lists against you, with any woman you
choose to name, because YOU will omit al
lenions, on accouu. Of your fine exterior.
which shall double on account of my plain
one!" He used to say that j, took him hall
an hour just to talk away his face. He
was SO exceedingly ugly, ,hs, lottery, Of
fee keeper once offered him ten guineas not
to pass his window whilst the tickets were
drawing, for fear Of his bringing ill luck up
on the house.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

GooD.-A reckless fellow, of some s,rag-
Cling abilities, one who could not appreci-
ate or had not been ,augh, real nobility OF
feeling, once delivered himself freely and Of
fensvely OF his socalled Independent sen.i-
ments, at scholastic table a. which sat ma
ny who were his superiors in every respect
He was especially rabid against discipline
He had his way for awhile; bu. finally one
of The elder and ADLER men ut whom he had
been talking, turned quietly to him, and said
I"I am not surprised. sir, that discipline seems
useless and oppressive TO you. 1t its disci.
pline ,hs, makes the scholar i. is discipline
tha, makes the gentleman; end it Is the
want of discipline tina, has made you-wha
you are" Such as be was are 100 easily
to be found.-.N Y Cour.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

THE FIRE E-EATERs.-About the year 1777
the Fire. eaters were in great repute in Ire
land. No young fellow could finish his
education till ba had exchanged shots with
some of bis acquain,ances. The first two
questions always asked as TO young mems
respecIabilisy and qualifications, particular
y when he proposes for lady-wife, were,
"What family is he Of :'-"Did he ever
blaze 20
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

BACHELORS IDEA.-The editor Of The
Hagerslown .Ne,cs, himself an old bachelor,
says: IN No,hng can prevent an increase OF
bachelorism save an amendmen, in the mode
of educating woman. When they learn
common sense instead of broken French.
when they learn some nseful employments
instead OF beating the piano, when they
learn to prefer honest industry to silly cox
combry, and when men find that woman
is a helpInate instead of burden, then we
may expect 10 find fewer bachelors-no
ill then"
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

A MODEL HUsDAND.-Governor Morgan,
if we may judge by The testimony sfforded
by the treatment of his wife, must have
been the 'moJel husband" He was no,
one of your modern skinfin!s, who cut of
a wife's inheritance if she happen to marry
again-not he! Quite the contrary. 10
his will, made short time before his death
after settling upon his wife liberal allow
ance, he says :-"And in case my wife
should marry, give her six hundred dol
lars more per annum, to de!ray the increas-
ed expenditure which may attend the con-
necion.''
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
ONE HAPPY HEART.-Have you made

ONE HAPPY HEART.-Have you made
one happy heart to-day? Envied privilege
How calmly you can seek your pillow
how sweelly sleep! Ia all this world there
is nothing so sweet as giving comfort to the
disressed,as getting sun ray into g loomy
heart. Children Of sorrow meets us wher-
ever we turn there is no moment that tears
are not shed, end sighs uttered. Yet how
many of those tears, those sighs are caused
by our own thoughllessness! How many
a daughter wrings the very soul of a fond
mother by acts Of unkiudness and ingratI-
tude: How many husbands, by one little
word, make whole day Of sad hours and
nnkind thoughts How many wives, by an
cry recriminations, estrange and embitler
their loving hearts How many brothers
and sisters meet but to vex and iniure each
other making wounds tha. no human heart
can heal! All! if each one worked upon
this maxim day by day-"s,rive to make
some heart happy"- jealousy, revenge, mad
ness, hate, with their kindred evil associate
would forever leave the earth Our minds
would be SO occupied in contemplation of
adding TO the pleasures of others, that there
would be no room fol the ugly fiends of dis
cord. Try it, ye disconten,ed, forever
grumbling devotees of sorrow, self-caused !;
it will make that little par. Of The world in
which you move as fair as Eden.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
VALUABLE TRACT OF LAND IN
CHARLES COUNTY FOR SALE.

TyHE undersigned will sell valuable tract CT
L Land in Charles County, Maryland, situated
on the PatuXent River, about one mile from the
village of Benedict, name unknown, containing
about
$50 ACRES,
more or less. formerly belonging to William c..
Dyer, and adjoins the lands of Col. John d. Bow
ling and others. This land is very valuable, as
much so perhaps as any in the State, and is adapt
ed to the usual crops Of Tobacco, Corn, Wheat,
&C. This land is well IiMBERED with yalua-
BILE Chestnut and other growth, and is ,veH aratered
there being an abundance Of water in every
field The neghborhood is desirable one-con-
venient to the post-ot.ce, churches, and schools.
The improvements consist Of a good
DWELLLN'G HOUSE,
=11sa.G.:sss Kitchen, Corn Houses, Stables,
LiIEa III ~ IN and other out-houses, and two
EEzs==-S=-zzsszs good Barns.
This land is very convenient to the steamboat
landing and other vessels, not being more than
mile of, which renders the shipping of crops
small matter compared with others less elgibIy
situated, the purchaser will have the privilege Of
seeding grain this fail. Possession given on the
first of January, 1854.
If this land is not sold at private sale before
TUESDAY, THE Cru DAY OF DECEMBER NEXT,
it will that day be offered at public sale, if fair
if not, on the next fair day thereafter, at - o.
clock, \. VI.
For terms, &C., apply to either
JAMES C. DYER,
JOHN G.. SUMMERS,
JOHN Ii. GWYNN.
SeDtcmher Is 1S53-tf
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
A CARD.

UENRY w. TOMLIN would respectfully
IL state to his friends that he has located him
self with Messrs. YERBY, TEBBS & YERBY,
Corner 7th st. and Pennsylvania Avenue, WASH
INGToN. d. c., where will always be fonnd large
and well assorted stock of DRY GOODS, well
adapted to the wants of the farmer and planter and
also great variety of fine DRESS GOODS, suit
able to the wants Of the ladies: and will be pleased
at all times to see his friends at his place OF
business and pledges himself to use his utmost ex-
ertions to give all entire satisfaction who may IA
vor him with their patronage.
Washington, Sept. 90, lS53-3m.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

CoNcLuslvE.-A schoolmaster, who bad
an in,olerab!e habit of talking 10 himself
when alone, was asked by neighbor what
motive he could have in talking TO himself
Jonathan replied that he had two good and
substantial reasons: in the first place, he
ked to talk to sensible man in The mex.
place. he liked to hear a man Of sense talk.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
P o E II r Y.
THE LIFE GAUGE.

They who ere measure life by years,
With false or thoughtless tongues
Some hearts grow old before their time
Others are always young!
'Tis not the number Of the lines
On Iife's fast filling page;
'I'is not the pulses added throbs
Dead, even while they hive!
Others, all spirit, heart and sense .
Theirs the mysterious power
To live, in thrills of joy or wo,
a tWelvemonth in an hour
Seize, then, the minutes as they pass
The woof of Life is Thought!
Warm up the coiors, let them glow,
BY fires Of fancy fraught.
Live to some purpose-make thy life
A gift of use to thee ;
a joy, good, golden hope,
A heavenly argosy.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

FOURTH OF MARcH.-Uhy Selected
Do our readers generally know why she
Fourth of March was chosen as the day oI
the Inauguration Of the Presiden. of The U.
nited States !? Ii was selected because the
fourth of March in every year, commencing
from the frs. Inauguration cannot come on
Sunday for at less, three hundred years.
The fact shows the great regard which
the trainers of our government had for the
Sabbath. They arranged the matter ST
wisely that the performance of the ceremo.
MES of the Inauguration will not fall on /
Sunday for three hundred years.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
DR.. F. OFFERMAN,
SUR GEO.N DE.NTI.S I

ID ESPECTFULLY informs the citizens OF
~ Charles county that he has taken rooms at
Mr.. D. MIDDLEToN's HOTEL, in Port Tobacco,
where he is prepared to perform all operations on
the mouth in the Dental line
Warranted TO please in Extracting. Filling, Cur
ing Scurvy, Inserting Teeth the pivot, or plate
work on the new patent suction principle.
DR.. F. 0. will wait on all those who prefer it at
their residences. 1t would be we'll to secure his
services early. Charges moderate.
sep l-tf
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

THEY HAVE Us!-At the late women's
rights convention, resolution was reported
and laid over for the Next meeting, that if
justice was moi fully done to the ladies, and
soon, that they acould stop the population Of
The country! "Angels and ministers of grace,
defend u.s." They'll have US there!
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

DERFUMERY, Combs, Brushes, Fancy Goods
l. &c. Lubin's genuine Extracts all varieties
Powder Pufls, double and single
Phicombe, Ok Marrow, &c.
Razor Stfops, four sided and others
Gman's Hair Dye
Lows genuine brown Windsor Soap; Lubin's and
French Toilet Powder; Porte Monaes, variety
Pocket, Dressing, and Fine Tooth Combs Teeth
Brushes an assortment; Wax Vestas and Tapers
Rousel's, Jules Haules Shaving Cream Military
and other Shaving Soaps; English Honey Soap
Hair Brushes, various patterns; Hair and Cloth
Brushes; German and other Colognes, just re-
ceived, and for sale by HENRY PEEL, Druggist
corner King and Fairfax streets, Alexandria, Va
sep Is.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

A celebrated topper, intending to 60 TO a
masked ball, consulted an acquaintance in
what character he shonld disguise himself.
go sober, and your most intimate ac-
quan,ance will not know you," replied his
friend
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

"ENRY PEEL, wholesale and retail Drug
L gist, corner of King and Fairfax street, ALEX
ANDRIA, Va, is now receiving his Fall supply of
DRUGS AND MEDICINES,
Glassware, Chemicals, Dye Stufs Combs, Brush
es, Paints, Oils, Coors, Fancy Articles Popular
Patent Medicines, &c, &c , the whole of which
has been selected with great personal care from
first hands. He solicits call and examination of
stock and prices by those purchasing in this mar
ket. All goods will be carefully packed and for
warded promptly. sep Is
A l. e
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY,
BY +. WELLS, JR.
EDITOR AND PRIET o X {.
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION.

For one year, if paid within six months, $3.50
'' 6 ifnot paid within six months, 200
ADvERTIsEMENTs.-S per square for two inser-
tlons-l2 lines of small type or IA of large type
constituting square-and 25 cents for every sub
sequent insertion. IF the number Of insertions be
not marked on the advertisement it will be pub
lshed until forbid, and charged accordingly.
liberal deduction will be made to those who ad-
vertise by the year.
Communications addressed to this Office must be
POST
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

Punch sa.s, an astronomer being aske ed
what The use of The eclipse was, replied
Oh, don, know, gives the sun time for
reflection.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

From lhe time when rulers were thought
demi- gods, there has been gradual decline
in mems estimate Of their power; this de-
cline is still in progress, and has still far to
o.-WeStminster Reuiew.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

There is 8 man in town so willy that his
wife manufactures all The butter that the
family uses from the cream Of bis Jokes.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

A lady gwen to ta,.le says she never tell:
anything only to two classes of people
those who ask her, and those who don't
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

VALUABLE LAND FOR SALE.
TENHE subscribers will sell valuable FARM,
4 situated in Piscataway District, Prince
Georges County, Maryland, about four or five
miles from Alexandria and about ten miles fron,
Washington city, lying on ''Tinker's Run, call
ed "Stone Hill, formerly belonging to William
T.. Dyer, and containing about
400 ACRES,
more or less and adjoins the lands of Col. R. L.
Jenkins, Walter A. Edeen and John Hunter,
Esqrs. This land is well adapted to the growth
Of Tobacco, Corn and Wheat. and the crops usu-
ally grown in this section OF country. The i'm
provements consist Of good
r ro9.., DUELLLNG HOUSE.,
-. s. Stable, and other out houses
sz9 zz I'm There is cn this Tract about 20
--S-== Acres Of valuable ITOOD Land,
perhaps the largest and most valuable in the
neighborhood.
This land is situated in healthy neighborhood
about three miles from PiscataWay, and convent
ent to the churches of the different denominations,
and also convenient to the post Office and school
o:~c.'ti:2 f.rclzS9 aa--n -,.i-iI-r.-ac
seeding grain this fall, if desired.
If this land is not disposed of before
SATURDAY, THE SD DAY OF DECEMBER NEXT,
it will that day be offered at public sale, on the
premises at IL O'Clock, A. NJ, if fair, if not, on
the following Monday. Possession given on the
first of January, 1854.
Tor terms, &C., persons will please call on
either JAMES c.. DYER.
JOHN G.. SUMMERS,
JOHN II. GWYNN.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

I. is only great souls tha, know how
much glory there is in being good.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
FOR SALE OR RENT.

INHE subscriber offers for sale or rent, the
l. TAVERN and LOT in Bryantown, owned
by him. There is a very fine Meadow attached
which will yield an abundance of hay for the use
of the Tavern. 1t has also fine Garden and al
necessary out buildings.
There will be comfortable buildings ready by
the 1st January next, for Tailor, Shoemaker, anc
Blacksmith, with the requisite out buildings.
For terms apply early to
sep S-tf WALTER F. BOARMAN.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
HILLTOP FOR RENT.

TNHE subscriber wishes to rent, the ensuing year
Il 1854 the DWELLING house, STORE house and
GRANARY, with all the other buildings attached
The Store is well known to be of the oldest
and best stands in the county for doing mercan-
tile business. There is u well of excellent water
in its yard. For further information apply to the
subscriber, living near fhe premises.
Sep 29-tf ]. ]. STONE.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

IHE RIFLE.-Many persone who are very
expert in the use of the rifle know nothing
of The principle on which it operates, and
would be at loss if asked why grooved
barrel throws ball truer than smooth
bore. The reasons are these:
In the first place, no bullet is or can be
cast perfectly spherical. One side is alway s
heavier than the other, and the ball therefore
swerves from the right line Of prcac,ion.-
However hard i, may be 10 prove this theo-
relically, practice demonstrates it. The same
smooth bores, immoveably fixed, twice load
ed with the same charge, of the same pow
der, and with the balls cast in the same
mould, will not plan. them both on the same
spot, a. the same distance. The rifle bar
rel is female screw, which gives the tight
ly driven ball rotary motion, so lha. if the
bullet, or rather the slug, swerves with one
twist of the screw, another revolution COR
reefs the error.
There are but three motions in a rifle
uaIr-uro SUurgus vr~orus-r -rt'o-"rrrur
The downward, caused by the power of gra-
Why. A rifle of thirty to the pound drops
its ball about foot in hundred yards
Rifles are sighted therefore to meet this de-
Walton. On leaving the barrel the ball moves
above the line of sight, continually falling
in parabolical curve, Till it inlersecls it,
The poin. of intersection is called the point
blank.
Who invented the rifle is not known. Its
principle was known TO The North Ameri.
can Indians before the discovery Of the con-
.inent. Their arrows are feathered spirally
and move precisely in The manner of a rifle
ball.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

DORT WlNE-A superior article in bottles for
Il invalids WIN. FERGUSON.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06
FOR BALTIMORE & WASHINGTON.
~ cSS<S!
s.5tsGsge s.txssGg
THE STEINER OSCEOL.

WILL, on the 18th September, commence run
w ming regularly between the above places,
leaving Washington every Sunday at o'clock,
A. M. Returning, leave Baltimore every Tuesday
at O'Clock, p NJ She will touch regularly going
and returning at Cone River, Leonard Town, and
ST. Mary's River, and at the usual landings Oh the
Potomac for signals or to land.
Passage and Freight at the usual rate.
sep l5-tf JAMES MITCHELL.
Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1853-10-06

WHAT THE "SKEETER" SLID TO THE
SLEEPY GENTLEMAN. - Hum-m - hum,
shut your eyes, sir. the noise you hear, is
nonght bu! flies, sir, whim- -m-w-h-i-m
don't be scared, sir; 60 to sleep, your sheet
are aired, sir Hum m - a-h-y-m-n it is
Pm singing, IFS music in your ears is ring
ing; won't sting you, sting you, Sitting;
I'd scorn 10 do so mean thing. A h-u-m-
bug j! is not me that bites. Take care!
don't slap never figlhs. Slap! whang!
take care! you nearly bit me. 'Twas me my
friend, sha. Bit ye. There! again it comes
10 blows; you fool, ] didn't touch your
nose. What in The worlds the use of slap
mapping! Ah-e-m- !-m-m, don't be alarm
ed, you really ought to be quite charmed.
Hum m-m, hum don't play the boy, mere
ly sung your lullaby. A whang, again.
There, there you GO. No use! you can'l
bite ME, you know. Now 60 to Sleep
Ala !! you're going. Now for feast, old
chap; 60 in. All right! he's gone I'll
have my gil. Say, old sleepy, here's my
BILL.