Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1853-07-20
8 q & q s.

u
How TO GET AN OFFIcE.-'Smoker,' in s.
the Comedy of Office Hunting" now being =
published in the Washington City Cotton 9
Plant gives the following recipe which D
will prove Of Importance to all hungry pa Il
triots /: { In fact women is the best maneu- n
yre after all. Take three pounds of petit q
coats, four smiles, two tear drops, with gam.
mon at discretion stir briskly and apply "
while warm to the blind side of a secretary,
and you have a never failing prescription for .
getting an office !
Ignorance il a great substitute for pare 8
poric; show us a blockhead, and we will show I.
YOU a man who who can sleep twelve hours :
out of a dozen. Before you can make men
wake(ul, you must make them intelligent. If
we owned the fee simple of a railroad, we
would consider no person BIT for a switch ter
der who didn't take four daily papers and a
weekly.
The happiest man in this world is said TO
be a nigger at a dance In our opinion
this rule is too limited. A 'nigger' is not or
ly happy at a dance, but in every other pc.
sition. A darkey may be poor, but he is
never low spirited. Whatever he earns he
invests in fun and deviltry. Give him dol
lar, and in less than an hour he will lay seven
shilings of it out in yellow neck.ties or a
cracked violin. There is a something in the
African that sheds trouble as a duck will wa
ter. Who ever knew a 'collud pussun' to
commit suiside2 The negroi is strongly civ.
en- to love aud jealousy; but he has no taste
for arsenic. lie may lose his all by betting
against a roulette, but he don't6nd relief for
his despair as white folks do, by resorting to
charcoal fumes or a new bed cord, but by
visiting de fair SEX and participating in the
may influence Of de occiputal conyolutions
of der clarinett.'
Paddy. attending a Broadbrim' conven-
ton for the first time, was much astonished
and puzzled withal at the manner of wor-
ship. Having been told that the brethren
spake even as they were moved by the spir-
it, he watched the proceedings with ~increas-
ing disgust for their { haythen way of wor-
ship till one Quaker arose and commenced
solemnly-
Brethren, l have married.
The divil ye hev! interrupted Pat.
The quaker sat down in confusion, butthe
spirit moving Pat RIO further, the young man
mustered courage and broke ground again
Brethren | have married a daughter o.
the Lord
The Givil We hev that ? said Pat, bui
it'll be a long while before liver yell see yeI
faLher-in-law.'
The piano Is the uUUuUr . os~-~~-
no sooner a young lady goes near one in SO
ciety, than she is Immediately seized with
very bad cold-she is. This is true only Q
those %spinters who don't know how to behav
themsel,es in company, and allow petty prid
to usurp the place of common sense anC
good. breeding. 1t was a good advice that
mother gave to her daughter: Emily
when in company you are asked to play
make no half way work of it, but politel
show your readiness to oblige. This wi
win for you golden favors from all presen
even although you do not perform so we'll a
YOU would wish. Besides, everybody is nj
a Judge of music Good advice truly. Th;
mother had seen the world. All piano
spiusters and singers should have it printe
aud pinned irrevocably tight to the bosom
their chemisetts
A dabbler ia literature, who prided hin
sclfupon his knowledge, came across a younl
stcr sitting on the bank Of a mill pond, an!
ling for sinners, and thus addressed him ::
'Adolescens, art thou eneeayoring to enti'
the inny race to engulf into their dentic
lated mouths u barbed hook, upon who
point is Fixed a dainty allurement? Nc
said the boy I'm fishing
A Kentucky traveller, dining at a lar
hotel in Albany, was annoyed by the sho
ing off of some of the members of Assel
bly,, who kept calling each other from tn,
respective counties, after this fashion: " |
thank the gentleman from Oneida &
&c. Whereupon the Kentuckian said to
huge darkey waiter, I'll thank the gent
man from Africa for a slice of ham, L
cooled off the fashion in double quick tu
A MOURNING WIDow.-Some one, W
has beer. rambling lately in the State
Maine, found or an old tomb stone in a
mote country church yard of that State, I
following affectionate inscription - Sacr
to the memory Of James III. Random, W
died August the sixth, 1900. His wild
who mourns as one that may be comfort,
aged only twenty-four, and possessing e
ry qualification of a good wife, lives at -
street in this village.
A young lady in Tennessee, when kiss
says, you thief, you, put that right b
where you got 1t.
A Pennsylvania damscl, having subj
ted to the same operation, backs right
and says, you scamp, you, do that agai
you dare
Ma, how high you reckon | ann
We'll, l don't know, spnny-how h
are yOuF
.iycll, Pm ten feet three inches, or Il
feet ten inches, I acnt know whish.
sSre tal-ain, I'"a~