The Ohio union. [volume] (Ashland, Ohio) 1849-1854, 1853-08-24

the cornield fence, meditating on the
course OF his TUE love- that was running
just as Shakespeare always said it did
rather rOughiy. "lf Su&sy Peabody has
taken a shine 10 that gawky, long shanked,
staMmeria', shy %crilleI, Gusset, just cause
he's a city Teller. she amt the gall | took
her for, that's sartin. No! its, the old folks
darn their ugly pieteFs. Old Mrs. Pea.
body was alters a dreadful high falutis crit
Ter, full of big notions, and the old. mans
soft head, is driven about by his wife just
as our old one eyed rooster is drove about
by our c%antankerous Dorkin' hen. But
il don't spite his fun, then my name si#'t
Jonathan. I'm going down TO the city by
the railroad next week, and when ] come
back, wake snakes, that all"
The above ~sollogny may serve TO give
the reader some slight idea Of the "lay of
the land" in the pleasant village where the
speaker resided.
Mr.. Jonathan Doubikins was a young
farmer, we'll to do in the world, and look
ing out for a wife, and had been paying his
addresses 10 Miss Susan Peabody of that
ilk, with a fair prospect Of success, when a
city acquaintance of The Peabody's, one
Mr.. Cornelius Gusset, who kept a retail
dry goods shop in Hanover street, Boston,
had suddenly made his appearance in The
field and had commenced the SCOUTING OUT
game. Dlzzled with The prospects OF be-
coming a gentleman's wife, pestered by
the opportunities of her mamma, the will
2ge beauty had begun to waTcyr when her
old lover determined on last bold stroke
to foil his rival. He went 10 the city and
returned; Of his business there, he said
no'bing, not even TO a pumping maiden
aunt who lighthouse for him. He went
not near the Peabody's bu, labored in his
casnield and garden, patiently awaiting
the result of his Vaccinations.
The next day, Mr.. Gusset vas sitting
with the old folks and their ''darter," in
the room OF the Peabody mansion, chat
Ting away as pleasantly as may be, when
The door opened, and in rushed a furious
Irish woman.
"ls it here ye are, Misther C~crnelius!"
she screamed, addressing the astoHshed
Gusset. Come out of that, before ! fetch
ye, ye spalpeen! is that what ye promised
me afore the prsste, ye haythen nager!-
Cummin' away from me and the childer,
lorsakin, yer lawful welded wife, and
runnin' after the Yankee girls ye infdel!''
"Woman, there must be some mistake
here slammered Gusset, taken all abaek,
by The charge.
"Divela BIZ of a mistake, ye sarpint.-
Oh! warraL wirral! was il for the like of ye,
| sacked little Dinnis Mccarthy, who
loved the ground | ihrod on, and all bekase
you promised 10 make a lady ov me, ye
durty thafe Of the worruld. Will ys cum
along to the railroad station, where | lf
little Patrick because he was sick wild the
small pox 10 cum any Further or will W
wait I'LL drag YET"
"Go--go-along,' gasped Gusseti "go.'-
and Ill follow YOU"
He thought ii best 10 temporize.
81 give ye tin minni,s," said The virago.
"If ye amt there, it's me cousin, Mr.
Thaddy Mulgruddery, will be after ye, yt
thaiG" And away went this unbidder
guest
Mr.. Gurset was yeicugnged' in siammer
ing out a denial of all knowledge of the
virago, when the parlor door opened ant
a little black eyed, Ratchet faced woman
IN a flashy silk gown and'a cap with many
ribbons pephed on the topof her head in
vaded the ssnciiiy Of the PaHor.
ais he b re!" she cried, in a decided
French accent. Then she added with a
scream, "Ah!-mon dieuI 10 uoifa! Here
he is. Traiire monsterd Vat for yol
run away from me! Dis two or tree year
| never see you, nevairr and my hear
broke YER bad entirely"
"Who are you'll" cried Gnsset his eve
starting out Of hishead, and shivering from
head to foot.
'.He asks who I am! o, Iadiesi 0tyo,
yer respectable old gentilhommel hear va
he ask! Who am |! Fortified! | am you
vife!"
~ never see you 'fore-so held me, Bob,'
cried Gusset, energetically.
Don't YOU swear!" said deacon Pea
body. "Ei you do I'll kick you, into fit
by golly. | won't have no profane o
vulgar language in my house,"
10, bless YOU! bless you rtspec,abl
old man; dell him he must come viz me-
Dell him,I hev spoke do re constable
Dell h~im-!"sob' interrupted her utter
ance.
ATS a pesky bad business" sal
the deacon, chatting with unwonled ire.-
"Gussei, you're a r~ascal!'
"Tske care, Peabody, take csre!" sal
the unfortunate shopkeeper.
al remarked you was a rascal, Gusse
You have gone and married Two wive
and that ere's fat burglary, i'll kno'
anything bout revised Statutes"
Two wivesl" shrieked the French W,
man:
"Now you clear out Of my house, {
away to the railroad station, and clear o
into, Boston, l wont have nolhin' more
do with YOU"
"Bu, deacon. harme."
"i don'i wan, TO hear you; ye ssrpin,
r cried the descous stopping his ears wi
his hands. "Marfyin't two wives, and col
in cour,in, a third! Go'long!- leave II
housed"
|, Even Mrs. Peabody, who was inclin
, to put in a word for the culprii, was
fenced. Susan turned from him in horr
and in utter despair, he fed to the IA
Al -. -.a.n. ko,l,, n..s,,SAI.Nl ehu alan