The Sumter banner. [volume] (Sumterville, S.C.) 1846-1855, 1853-04-19
FANNY 3FERN.

FANNY FERN. 5i8f
AN UNEAsr PRnD1cAhEsT.-yYesss
were the witness of "a ludieYeus ;ne;.s
dent which occurred in this cityy.,s33 IS
few days since, for relating which Ws &
crave the indulgence of the gentleman
directly concerned-deeming it too
good joke to be lost. & 4, ~ ,ss q
While sitting at our desk, md Ia.
boring assiduously, with pen, scissors
and paste, to make out a, readable pa
per tor our patrons, We were suddenly
Enlightened from our propriety,n by
the hasty entrance of gentleman,
exclaiming, "For Gods sake, help me m,
to see what's the matter! Pve gotsoIne
dreadful thing scorpion or tarantnla
in the leg ofmy pantaloons! Quick
-quick-quick--help me!n
We instantly rose from our chair,
half frightened ourselves. Our friend
had broken in SO suddenly and unex. !
pectedly upon us, and was so wonder
fully agitated that we knew not wleth.
er he was indeed IN his senses or NOT.
We looked at him with sort of sur
prise mixed with dread, and hardly
knew whether to speak with, or
seize and confine him for mailman j
The latter we came near attempting.
There he stood, quivering and pale,
with one hand tightly grasped upon q
part of his pantaloons just in the hol.
low of the knee. ,.f
"What's the matter?" asked we,
at last. s,.,
"Ihe matter!' he exclaimed; ooh.
help me! I've got something here,
which inst ran up my leg! Some in.
fernal scorpion or lizard, / expect! Oh.
these pants without straps! I'll nev.
or wear another pair open at theS
bottom as long as live. All! j
feel it again"
"Feel what?" we inquired, standing
at the same time, ut "a respectful dis.
tance from the gentleman; for we had Z
just been reading our Corpus Christi
correspondents letter about snakes, liz.
ards, and tarantulas, and began to inn.
agine some deadly insect or reptile in
the leg of our friends unmentionables,
as they are sometimes called. Il i5a
81 don't know what it is,m answered
the gentleman; ''help me to see what IL
is. was just passing that pile Of
rubbish there, in front Of your Of:
fee, and felt it dart up my leg as
quick as lightning"-and he 'clencEed
his fist more tightly. Hit had been
the neck of an anaconda, he would
have squeezed it to o jelly.
By this time two or three of the
newsboy had come in; the clerks and
packing boys hearing the outcry, stop.
ped working, and editors all hands
stood around the sufferer with looks Of
mingled sympathy and alarm. Ri
'Bring a chair, Fritz" said we,s
sand let the gentleman be seated
':Oh ] can't sit" said the gentIemaas
81 can't bend my knee!-if l dois5
will bite or sting me; no, can't sit..'s
"Certainly You earn Sit" said We;
"keep your leg straight out, and
we'll see what it is you have got
"Well, let me give it one more hard
squeeze; I'll crush it to denth,n said
he, and again he put the force. ofan
iron vice upon the thing. If it had
any life left, by this last effort muss
have killed it," He then cautiously
seated himself holding out his leg as
stiff and straight as poker. "A sharp
knife was procured; the, pants were
cut open carefully, making hole large
enough to admit hand; the gentleman
put on thick glove, and slowly in
serted his hand, but he discovered
nothing. We were all looking on jim
almost breathless silence to see the
monstrous thing-whatcyer it might
be; each ready TO scampers out of.
harms way should it be alive; when
suddenly the gentleman became, if
possible, more agitated than ever. I.
''By heavens!" he exclaimed, sits
inside my drawers. It's alive, too, /
feel t!--quick!-give me the knife a..
gain!" Another incisen WAS made
in went the gcntleman's gleved hand
once more, and 10! cut came--k;s
'cite's stocking!
How the stocking ever got there sse'
are unable to say; bas there it GER.
taifly was; and such laugh as fol-
lowed, we haven't heard for many
day. Our friend, we know, has
told the joke himselG, and inust paf-
don us for doing se.--Though this
is all about q sfoesia.g, w,s assure our