, 1853-06-18

There are no songs comparable to the
songs of Zion, no Oralions equal to those Of
the Prophets, aud no politics like those
which the Scriptures teach.
A stupid boy is not improved by whip
ping, although Miss Leslic gives full direc-
lions how to whip sillybub.'
The reply Of an enlightened Mahomedan
10 missionary, is characteristic Of the race
of Moslems -" Your religion" said he,
"gives me three Gods and oncwife; mine
gives me three wives and one God; / pre-
fer my own"
Honor and riches are the two wheels up
on which the whole world is moved these
are the two springs Of our discomfort.
He only is q great man who can neglect
the applause OF the multitude, and enjoy
himself Independent Of its favor.
The nearest way to honor is for man so
to live that he may be found TO be that in
truth he would be thought to be.
I. A prince ought more 10 fear those whom
he hath advanced, that those he hath op.
pressed for the one hath the means to do
mischief, but the other hath not the power.
John was thought to be very stupid. He
was sent TO tho mill one day, and the miller
said, John, some people say you are fool,
now tell me what you do know and what
you don't know" " WELL" replied John,
al know miller'S hogs are fat" "Yes,
that's well, John; now what don't you
know 7" al don't know whose corn fats
'em."
Theodore Parker says =" 1t is better to
throw guard about the baby's cradle, than
10 sing psalm at bad mans death-bed =,
better to have care while the bud is burst
ing 10 the sun, than when the head has
scorched the heart Of the unguardcd bo-
son.
A CLEVER BoY.-'Papa, Pve been see
ing cook make bread: and can YOU tell me
why dough resembles the sun p sThe sun
Freddy ? Yes, pa" No, | cannot.'
Freddy with great glec), because when
itrises 1t is light"
MELANCHOLY REFLEcTioN.-What a
pity it is summer is so short Before you
know it, lovers become deacons, and romps
grandmothers /
A barber, who was in the habit of stun
ming bis customers ears by the rapidity of
his tongue, asked an individual one day how
be wished his beard to be cut. Without
saying single word,' replied he.
Papa, what is that picture over the man
tie piece . The vain father answered, 'why
that's papa's arms, my darlingp 'Then
why don't you have your legs put up too p
was the reply.
john said the schoolmastcr, 'you will
soon be man, and will have to do business,
what do you suppose you will do when you
have TO write letters, unless you learn to
spell better Q 'Oh, Sir replied John, Il
shall put easy words in thcm.'
A maiden lady suspecting her female ser
want was RECALLING her beau upon the cold
mutton Of the larder, called Betty, and in
quired whether she did not hear some one
speaking with her down stairs ooh, no,
ma'am,' replied the girl, it was only me
singing psalm p You may amuse FOUR
self, Betty,' replied the maiden, with
psalms, but let's have no hims, Betty. n
have great objection to hims.' Betty curt
sled, withdrew, and took the hint.
Use not evasIons when called upon TO dbI
q good thing, nor excuses when you are re-
preached for doing bad one.
A gentleman in one of the steamboats,
asked the steward, when ho-came 10 collect
the passagemoney Us. each for the best
cabin, il there was no danger of being
blown up! The steward promptly replied,
mo, Sir, not the least We cannot afford to
blow up at these low prices.'
Colonel Christie, an Irish officer, who
served with considerable credit in America,
had the misfortune to be severely wounlcd.
AS he lay on the ground, an unfortunate
soldier, who was near him and was badly
wounded, made terrible bowling at which
Christie exclaimed-" What do you make
such noise fort Do you think nobody is
killed but yourself;
pO~ Miss Pomclly says the first time a.
coal sleeve encirclcd her waist, she was in
a pavilion built of ranbows, The window
sills of which were composed Of FoleanI
haIps. 81
DR.. R maintained that poverty was
n virtue" That was making a vi;tuc Of.
nccessitv,' soid hvstlnder.