Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1853-03-31
CHIPS AND CLIPPINGS.
IN Amusing Incident.

a u
miles from Grafton, and who for the sake Of con-
yenience we will call Bill I. and Joseph w met
one day last week for the purpose Of transactng
business. After leaving the office Of Mr.. Quill,
Bill says TO his companion, " should like lit
tie gin before going home, bat | suppose the ar
tcle Is not 10 be had in this place Joe, vino
lived in the vicinity, answered, think can
find some let us try" Accordingly they enter
ed the public house, but found 1t minus the land
lord. Bill saysto Joe, 4" You are acquainted here, !
look in the lock-up--the door Is open" Joe
looked about and found large jug, partly filed, |
hauled il out and took ont the stopper. Bill ap-
piled his nose to the jug and PRONOUNCED it rum.
Joe turned outa glass, and handed 1t TO Bill who
tasted aud turned it back. Joe then smells of
the "cri;ter" pronounces Il alcohol and proposes
to have drink. Both then took " good swign |
and slid out ofthc room quietly. On getting to the |
door, Joe coniectured there was turpentine
taste in his mouth, and he then recollecied that
the landlord kept jug Of Turning Fluid in the |
very place whore be found the one from which
thct had " imbibed" He Immediately informed |
BIZ of the fact What followed was rich. Bill, /
in the agony of his soul, cries, Where is the /
Doctor for Gods sake, where is the Doctor" /
Hold on says Joe, for heavens sake he
quiet; we have families, whose reputation is al |
stake. Ii we must die through our own folly, |
let US do it like men. and not disgrace our fam !
Hes But iill had too great a love of life to
think OF consequences, and started for help. Joe
seized him by The shoulder and held on, at the
sane time endeavoring to persuade him that they
had better die, carrying the secret To the grave
with them, than 70 have It made public by calling
IN the aid OF o physician at that time, suggesting
that they might live to reach Dr. G.. who could
use the stomach pump, and would keep their Sc
cret Upon this they both got into tbe sleigh and
started, and as they turned The corner, with the
horse upon the rum we heard Joe say. Should
4 ! i've through this III JONI the Sons. - Bciioics
Z Falls Standard
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,..-i a., 80 ID 80 :. t.. '.'-5
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stop. He let dy hs axe at Bruiu but &, missed, .
and Bruin To- turn JET ily az hm solomon then 1
seized a club and land blows upon his shaggy
adversary so heavily that il broke. and be began
to think that bee would have 20 knock under. Not
ihaWng the where wlthal 20 knock him with, he (
made use Of his fists expecting every moment
that he should be compelled TO cave 10. A /
dreadful hug followed. and the two rolled over
Hon the ground. ike couple OF wrestlers in a
rng Not liking to bear Il in this fashion, Sol
omjn, by desperate effort, got Bruin under
him. holding his head down, and sitting plump
Aastrde of the beast The latter. however soon
Began TO bear no. and all at once took 10 bis heels
Ike an Infatuated bull-Solomon all the while
4stride and compelhng the bear TO follow his
bWn nose, with as slight deviation Of his Jaws
from straight line as possible. On they drove
b. a furious the rider and the rdden-the
Former ondeayorng TO make a bride out of the
bears ears. and the bear striving as hard TO make
bite out of the mans urm. Solomon began to
Fear at the rate he was going, that his steed was
fast taking him 10 whole nest of bears. Mr.
Breeds son happened 10 oyertakc them on their
Tourney and settled all uncertainties by mmedi-
\ ttely knocking the bear IN the head with an axe
lMr. Reed cot some scratches in the scuiile and
pun It' ci,cuse 70 boot me" uy the way
S''''u uo"A 10y 'a'nls USE
A0t'' 'Ou''0'
Newspaper b. Lsucs. A contemporary laws
down the following pithy code of newspaper by
laws. They are the best We have seen drawn
up:-l Be brief This is the age of tclcgraphs
and stenogmphy. 2 BE- pointed. Don't write
a around a subject without hitting it 3 State
facts, but don't stop to moraiize. It's n drowsv
subject Let the reader do his own dreaming
4. Eschew prcfaces Plunge at once into your
subject like a swimmer into cold water >. If
YOU have written sentence that You think partl-
cnlarlY fine, draw your pen through it, A pet
child Is always the worst in the family. 6. Con-
dense. Make sure that you really have an idea,
and then record II IN the shortest possible terms
w want thoughts in their quinlesscnce Z.
When your article is completed. strike out nine
fenihs of your adectiues. The English Is a strong
language, bu, won't bear much Producing :.
Avoid all highhown language. The plainest
Ango-Saxon words are the best Never use
SUIT when legs will do as well. 9. Make your
sentences short. Every period is a milestone. at
- ine isaue' may nav ana resi- h'lnsen' ~
Ml',t iesloY' ION iel our ln1nnso lpl loon
- ue uaoNs % spIuoI "au u'u"neu ~ INA
- s.au 'uls'DAe uly On, lo' eeniUS' ''ougn
NC writes as e'aoo.ul} a. Napo,eoh
'O'""'"S' "''''' ''H''s"''"'
JIjqnor lar in S,ceden. In Sweden, whoov-
er is found drunk is fined, for the first offence,
81 for the second, So; for the third or fourth,
imprisonment is added to the fine, and deprived
Of the right Of voting at the elections, or holding
Office and exposure to the church on Sunday. n
ue SUM ss, ,uua' Is iouii couil'ig 'ie SANE
- no = il pa ii''I''is
sne Gor'uvs I'M ~ lru iSuos' II professor %
& "h.eb 49,, anu Il. - ous Oh
,'.,i :; fno1 =, Viii 49, e
,oN su''l - e'uol,u ,oI
49, y,' - d., bonoe'. 7, 80
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