Meigs County telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy [Ohio]) 1848-1859, 1853-12-20
HUMOROUS SELECTIONS.
Fun in california.
TERMs OF suRscRIPFIoN.

and thalwas nopsuspected Of ever being in
clined TO fun. The ediior's name is j.
,yndson Ames. county Judge and amoderale
man, sLalely--before The eleclon--he took
iIipio his head 10 60 on tour 10 another
paTl Of The Sta,e. TO electioneer probably for
The democratic Bigler, and entrusted The
Herald during his absence TO the charge of
John Phoenix, Esq, agenlleman of.ha. lk,
known in this vicinity by the name Of Der
by; ,9g.i .ss, ..t.. ,......
~ BIZ. the Judge had forgotten 10 enquire
into The nature Of Mr.. Phoenix's politics,
and the frsl thing the new editor did was ID
change the political character Of the Herald
By running up The Wing flag, bearing the
name of William Walda for Governor =
The Judges CONSERVATION NAV be fancied.
He Immediately wrote back lrller 10 Phoe.
nix. telling him 10 bring The Herald back to
its allegiance; whereupon Phoenix declares
his democracy, tha, his support of Waldo
was a misluke, and asks forgiveness, avow.
ing himself ready to embrace democracy
with ardor, slap her on The back, and de.
'clare himself in favoro( erecting a statue Of
Andrew Jackson on the plaza
Whatever is, is right (says. Phoenix,)
as the old gentleman swee,Iy remarked
when he chopped off1he end Of his nose
with razor, in The endeavor 10 kill fly
thai had lilihereon when he was shaving
applies the remark 10 the election of Bigler.
and adds--Ii this election should, however
indirecdv. cause San Diego to assume It's
proper position as The first commercial city
Of California, Isshall reverence the name OF
John Bigler forever, and | will bes'ow that
ahonored appeIlaiion uponmy youngest child.
and have it engraved upon a piece Of leaih-
or or other suitable material. and suspend it
upon the tender Infants neck. unul such
dine as he shall be old enough TO learn and
love the vir,uesof his honored god.sre.
Mr.. Phoenix in his arm chair writes an
eloquen, valedictory on retiring from the ed.
i,or. ship. He says: .- gH.., ls
'TE DEUM LAUDAMus Judge Ames has
returned With The completion of this ar.
,icle. our labors are ended; and. wipng my
pen on my coai.lail. and placing il behind
my sinister ear with graceful bow and a
bland smile for my honorpd admirers. and a
wink Of intense meaning for myenemes.
shall abdica,e with dignity the armchair
10 It's legitimate proprietor. BY the way,
This arm chair is bu, pleasant fclion Of
.Bos,on's'-lhe only sea, in the Herald Of
fee. being an empty nail key which | have
occupied while wri,ing my leaders upon an
inverted sugar box. that answers the purpose
Of table, But such is life. Dvesled Of
its poetry andromance, the obiecls Of our
bighes, admiration become more and morp
common places. like,he Herald's chair and
table. MANI ideas which we have learned
10 reverence from the poetry Of imagination as
tables become old sugar boxes on close
inspection and more intimate acquain.
iance.'
IF he has given offense TO any one,
he is ready TO accep, their apologies He
says: g
,Commencing as an independent journal.
] have gradually passed through all the sta.
ges orincipen, Whigery, decided conserva.
ism. digni6ed recanIa,ion, budding democ.
racy and rampsnt radicalism. and | now
close the series with an entirely literary
number. in which have carefully ubstained
fromthe mention Of Bado and Wiglpr, mean
Wagler and BildO, no-never mind-as
Toodes SAYS: havn'i mentioned any of EN-.
but been careful 10 preserve a perfect armed
,neutralitv.'
The description of the arrival home oil
Judge Ames after all ,he trouble Phoe.
nix hal caused him, is very rich. He says
'CooIlv we gazed from the window Of lhe
office upon The new town road. we deserted
q cloud of duS, in the distance, far above il
waved whip lash. and we said Boston
. .cometh. and 'his driving is like tina, o
Jehu the son Of Nimshi, for he driye,h furi.
ously.' -t.8 .lA
Calmly we seated ourselves in the arm
chair, and continued our labors Anon q
step, heavy step, was heard upon the
stairs, and Boston stood before us. Ir
shape and gesture proudly eminent, stool
like lower ....... 3. but his face deep scar
ofihunder had inlrenched, and care sat on hi
faded cheek; but under brows of daunlles
courage and considerale pride. waling re
revenge We rose. and with an unfaIter
ing voice said, We'll Judge, how do you do.
He made no reply, but commenced takin,
off his coat. We removed ours, ais,
our cravat. ~ tt.J .9~e ~
,aA s~s EEA
The SIKH un1 last rounds describe
by the pressman and composi,ors as fear
fnlly scientific We held Boston dow
over the press by our nose (which we ha
inserted between his teeth for that purpose,
and while our hair was employed in hnldin
one of his hands, we held The other in ou
left. and with the Sleeps foot brandshe
above our head, shouted 10 him, Say Waldo
neverl he gasped-
oh my Big--ler, he would have muttered,
But that he dried up ere the word was uttered.
Al this moment we discovered lha, we ha
been laboring under misunderstanding
and through ihe amicable intervention Of III
pressman, who ,trus, the roller between o
faces. (Which gave The whole affair vpr
diffefeni complexion) the matter was fna
iy sanled on the most friendly terms, IAN
without prejudice 10 The honor of either pa
w. We write this while sitting wilho
any clothing, excep. our LEFT stocking, ar
the rim olour hal encircline onr neck III
rpffofthe ElizabeIhan era,--lhal ariic
OF dress having been knocked over our hei
during an early sage d The proceedings. al
uhe crown subsequently Torn off while {,
\ a. -