Loudon free press. (Loudon, Tenn.) 1852-1855, 1853-04-15
How're GET RID OF BoRs.-The very s;pbt

How TO GET RID OF A BoRE.-The very sight
of W1NCHELL upon our streets, reminds us of
an incident which happened but year or two
ago. Winchell was reclining on his couch in
the globe Hotel, Syracuse on a summers after
noon, perusing one of James latest novels,
when drawing down-eastren voice was heard
in the hall, in a dialogue with an Irish cham
bermaid, who was busily engaged in hopping
the floor, and serenading the Comedian with
"Up slips Gineral Bonapart, and tuck me be
the hand" saying:
Yankee.-Whar bouts is Wiuchells room
gal?
Chambermaid.-Yell find him in number II,
the deur is bit open, We sec singing, "How
duz ould Ireland, and how duz it stand" Gel
Enter down-easter into WIS room-stands
and whistles anything but tune, gazes at the
redundant humorist from head to foot aud final
ly opens after this fashions:
Xankee.--Pick up considerable money a.
round ha?
Winchell.-(feigning Deafness What kind
of hay? Go down the office to Mr.. Marsh-it
is marsh hay you've got to sell?
Yankee-(perplexed.) Bin in this bisness
long?
Winch.-There's Misses Long somewhere
in town, takes in white-washing, don't she.
Yankee-Ain't you Winchell, that 1 have
heard stories about?
Winch.-About one story higher, third story
is about one story higher.
Yankee.-Je-ru-salem 1 guess l must be
in the wrong room, 10 Thom-sin, you know
him don't you?
Winch.-No, don't chew; but see you do,
by the way you flood the carpet.
Yankee.--(completely dumb founded.) l
calculate I've barked up the wrong tree, here
GALL look here
Cham.-Who had been listening very aten-
lively to the interesting dialogue. What is it
you are after?
Yankee.-Didn't you say number fourteen?
Cham.-Sure l can't find you wild ears: l
said number fftain. You'll mind that it's him
by the way he'll spake Frinch, jst for fun like.
Yankee.-Yes, that's the critter, 10 Thorn
sin used 20 tell about his cutting up dog in Sche-
nactady in the Collectors office on the canal
Yankee tries the door of No Is, in which
Miscah Hauser the celebrated violinist was
domiciled, and who was just commencing to
dress for dinner. Hearing his door appealed
to with sundry unusual kicks, he opened it an
inch, and to his horror, in bolted the aforsaide
intruder, Sdls ceremOnic; and sits upon the bed
whereon are spread sundry shirts, cravats, jew
elry. &c.
Yankee.-Gosh, old fellow, l got you at last;
slip on your rags and lets go and take horn.
| got more'n three dollars any how to spend be-
fore | go hum.
Hauser-Vous av some bisness wis me-
Vous vo vex I am Jaime, in hishablle.
Yankee.-Never mind the bill, I'll treat;
come down. 10 Thomsin used to tell me about
you in Schenectady.
Hauser.-(in rage.) Allez! Alezl Vons AL
lez, sacracausille.
Yankee.-Exactlv, on the canal, in the Col
lector's Office, there's where he knew you; whoop
got you at you at last old boss. He said you'd
begin to cut up dog.
Hauser.-Old boss! cut up the dog, that is
not my professin Cut up Won dog diable, l am
sair Mons. Hauser.
Yankee.-Yes, you are boss sir. Now
give us that Dutch story and III treat
Hauscr rings the bell in a violent manner.
Enter Bar keeper.-Did you ring sir
Hauser.-Certhinmen | ring; take dis man
away, 10, l am no acquaintance wis him; he
come in, he sit down upon de bed, he soil over
de bed, he mon shirt spoil mon cravat, mon
chepeau, everything, see! see!
Yankee Taking another roll.) You'll dew
to travel, gosh How du you put that hair
on tew your upper lip?
Bar Keeper-You are mistaken in the room.
Winchell is in No. IA.
Yankee.-That are gall said No. Is. Say
gall.
Cham.--(Sings.) IT'S poor distressed Ma
ton as ever yet was seen, for they're hanging
men and wimmen for the wearing of the green.
Bar Keeper-Mary, come here minute.
Faat'ud l be doing there.
Yankee.-Did'nt you say No. Is.
Cham.-Sare, / tauld zee number IA; / am
not after fndin' We wild ears. Tbin slips Cine
raj Bonapart,' goes off singing.
Bar Keeper.-I guess you've seen the ele-
plant, anyhow.
Yankee.-Tve seed lot of dar., skunks, ex-
it down-c astar grumbling.
The scene closes with an explanation betw-
teen Mr.. Hauser and Winchel to the amuse-
ment of both.