Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1853-03-17
Amt UNITY On MAIAIslosy Il

5,# 7 H. II
Nav nfls, said Aunt Helty. put dew
yaar emhf4tdeIY and 5NhFstvd work, do
something senslhlsii and stop building air
castles and talking "a. lovers aud hpneyr
maens = makes me SICK it's perfectly en-
llmonlat~ Love Is . farce -matfimony ia
humbug husbands are dpmestio N apolepns,
heroes, Alexanders, signing for otherIhearts
70 conquer after they are. sure Of yours ~
The holeymeon is as short lived as luqiferf
match after that you may wear your we'd
ding dresssat the wash tub, and your night
cap to meeting, aud your husband wouldn't
know it, You may pick up your own peck
ct handkerchief, help yourself to a. chair,
aud split your gown across the back reach.
ing over the table to get piece Of butter, .
while lie is laying iii his breakfast as if il
was the last meal be should eat iifthe
world; when be gets through he will aid
your digestion. twhile YOU are slipping your
irsi cup of coffee) by inauiring what you'll
have foridnner, whethertheI Geld lamb was
all ate yesterday if the charcoal is all out.
and what you gave for the last tea you
bought Thon he gets up from the table,
lights his cigar with the lasnrevening's pa
per that you have not haH chauce to
read; gives two or three whiffs Of smoke,
sure to give you head ache ,f9E the after
noon. and just as his cont tasSs vanishing
through tho door, apologies Tor NOT doing
"that errandp for yop yesterday thinks il
doubtful if he can to1day-aso pressed With
business" Hear of him $tl clock, taking
ice cream with ssome ladies at Vinton's,
while you are at homo new lining Liscoat
sleeves. Children by the ears all day, cant
get out to take the air$ feel us crazy al d fy
in drum; husband COMES home at night,
mods a chow dye do, Fan boxes Charley's
ears. stands little Fanny1in the corner, sits
down in the easiest chair in the warmest
corner, put his feet up oyerltbe crate shut-
ting out all the fire, while the babys little
pug nose grows blue with the cold 4; reads
the newspaper all 10 himself, solaees his in
ncr man withia hos cupiof TED and lust a.
you are laboring under the hallucination
that ho win ask youfto taxi . moutLful of
fresh air with him. lie puts ion his dressing
gown and slippers, and begins to reckon up
the family expeGses!l after which lie lies
down on the sofa, and You keep time with
yeur needle, while be snbres till O'clock
Next morning ask him to leave yous'a lit.
re money he looks IatEou ash if to % sure
that you are in your right mind, draws !,
.sl8n iohg enough ana strong enough s0fln-
Hate pair OF bellows, and asks you Rt.what
do you want with il, and III half 81 dsllar
, wou'tao GraciousIki k AS if thosellittic
shoes, and stockings and petticoats could
be had for half dollar Oh. pirlsiI set
your affections Oh cats, poodles. parrtks. or
laP dogs hut let nlatrlmony nlone4I Its
tie hardest WY on eartll1of getting kyins
lyon never know wLenyour work isIdons
UP THINK of cary ing eiglt Of nipeEcLil.
dren through the measles, chicken pox lra.b.
tnilt1fs, and scarlet ieyeirl some Of en- twice
over II ibabds my headache To think IF III
On you may sefnpj AID ave, AndtNisi,
anu turn, and dig aud delye,ahd eeenbmiss.
ASti BIS aud your husband viii natyy :.
gam and taltp What you have saved III dsss.
Ms seeena- Wifi Will, adj she'll lals Ysay
portrait far iifebeaFd hut what's ,hsf usa
Of talklHgl .lIll wafraht every aIa az yaniil
Wy III tie first ehaupa You Get thesest
sort II hpWllehmpnt ahnlt ii sunehuw. I
wish ono half DC the world warns fools and
tolhsF half idiots Idoss OH, dear