Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1853-03-16
washing Sheep.
A LAUG ABLE STORY

The following story is decidedly rich If any
one has read it before, let him read it and laugh
again.
(" A year or two since, when the subject of tenn
perance was being freely discussed, the citizens
of little town in the western part of Massachu-
sets called meeting to talk over the matter.
There had never been temperance society in
that place. but after some little discussion, it was
voted to form one. They drew up pledge of to-
tai abstinence, and agreed that if any member of
the society broke it, he should be turned out.
Before the pledge was accepted, Deacon F. a.
rose and said he had one objection to it; he-thot
that Thanksgiving ought to be free for the mem
bers to take something, he could relish his din
ner much better at this festival if he took glass
of wine.
Mr.. L. thought that the pledge was not perfect.
He didn't care about Thanksgiving, but his fami-
y always made great account of Christmas, and
couldi't think of sitting down to dinner then with
out something to drink. He was willing to give
it up on all other days, and, in fact, that the
only time when he cared anything about it.
Mr.. B. next arose, and said he agreed with the
other speakers, except tho time. He did not think
much of Thanksgiving or Christmas, though he
liked little any time. There was one day, how
ever, when he must have it, and that was the
Fourth OF July. He always calculated to have a
"reg'ar drink" ON that occasion, and he wouldn't
sign the pledge if it prevented him from celebrat
ing Independence
Squire S., an old farmer followed Mr.. 3. He
was not in the habit of taking any thing often,
but must have some when he washed his sheep
Why. he considered it dangerous for him to keep
his hands in cold water, without something to
keep him warm inside.
After some consideration it concluded that
each member of the society should take his own
occasion to drink-Deacon F. on Thanksgiving,
Mr.. L. on Christmas, etc. The pledge was sign
ed by large number, and the society adjourned
in lourshing condition, after voting that it shod
be the duty of the members to watch each other
to see that they did not break the pledge.
The next morning Dea. F. walked into his
next neghbor's yard, who, by the way, was Squire
S., the sheep man, wondering, as it was bitter
cold morning, whether S. was up yet. He met
his neighbor coming out of the house, and to his
surprise, gloriously drunk, or to use a modern
phrase, Nburning very beautiful kiln
"Why, Squire s.!' exclaimed the astonished
Deacon, 'swhat does this mean, sir! You have
broken the pledge, and disgraced the society and
the temperance cause"
Not-hie-as you knows on-hic-Deacon,"
said S. 6. havn't-hic-brok the-he-pledge
Deacon
s'Certainly you have, sir, and shall report you
to the society. You agreed not to drink except
when you washed sheep. You cant make me
think you are going to wash sheep such cold
morning as this"
"F-follow me-hic-Deacon."
Squire S. started for the barn, and the Deacon
following. On entering the door, the Deacon
saw a large wash tub standing on the floor, with
an old ram ted to it, the poor animal shaking
dreadfully with the cold, and bleating pitifully.
Hic-there, D-d-deacon,'' said S., pointing to
the sheep, with air of triumph, 8. that old-hic
ram has b-been washed s-six times this-hic-
morning, and I-hic-aint done-hic-with him
-hic-yet.'
1t is hardly necessary to add, that the Deacon
mizzled.'