The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1853-02-02

WnCneSter s Writings. Oul SOOH IOunu one
awful draw back in his philosophy. For
though he met one OF my strongest objec-
tons to the old Book--eternal punish
ment--yethe forcibly taught that vice and
virtue would be rewarded in eternity-lhat
the wicked would suffer the mos, excruciat-
ing pains Tor thousands OF years. while the
virtuous by repentance and faith would
secure an immediate entrance into life
eternal This last was in accordance with
the teachings of the Book. never was in
favor of suffering, nor did | wish so cir
cuitous route TO The regions of bliss; nor
was | convinced that place where the
vile, the base, the contaminated Of every
age. land and nation were confined, for
crimes that infihite mercy, eternal justice.
nor diving love. could move them TO aban-
don, would be very suitable place Of re-
form. | had observed in some of my cas-.
ual reading that there was but one name
given under heaven, or among men that
could atone for sin, and through faith in
that name alone salvation could be obtain
ed. was opposed 10 all suffering and
what was seeking was a safe passage to
regions Of eternal happiness, without the
pain of repentance and the modification
of selI.denial. But after all my researches
could find no system or book that could
still the vibrations Of this uneasy pendu-
lum, but much to accelerate its motion.
For though ] sought with an earnest de.
sire TO believe the doctrines of universal
ism. yet could not believe that the impure
and unholy, dying with oaths and bias
phemy on their tongues. and often with
hands stained with blood, were fit subjects
for the regions of infinite purity; nor that
the compassionate God himself would
award the same heaven OF rest to the cruel.
the murderous, that the benevolent, the
holy. the generous benefactors of mankind
should inherit. This appeared too prepos.
terous for any sane PERSONS faith; and |
was well assured that none believed or
tried to propagate this system, but those
who were themselves most deeply sunk in
crime.
Thus finding every refuge fail, and a
thorn in every flower Of earth, and drop
Of poison in every cup Of mortal joy, my
existence became my greatest curse. |
literally loa,hed life. The heaven seemed
clothed with sackcolh. and the earth GOV.
cred with impenetrable gloom. Nor is
this an overdrawn picture; for solemnly
declare that l'know OF no language sufi-
cien,ly forcibe to portray the feeling Of
despair, that took possession of my bosom.
That too, in the morning Of life. when all
should have been sunshine about my path.
| can recollect when for years, there was
scarcely "a single oasis to be found in all
my mental desert This | endured all
alone, for the father who had daily read
portion of the old Book around the family
altar, was reposing in the tomb; and how
could | bear to divulge the deep skeptcism
and painful reasonings of my dark spirits
to that mother who had taught me TO lisp
the name OF Jesus in prayer; and who, so
far as | knew, "had never had an unbe-
lieving doubt" being early and soemnly
imbued with the spirit of meekness and
piety--indeed this Book furnished her code
OF law, and my actions were always tested
by it, and found good only when they COR
responded with its precepts; SO that was
mostly found minusin this respect. There
was nothing dreaded more than the ap
plication made of its mos, pungent truths,
when felt guilty Of the alleged crime.
For so perfectly conversant did she ap.
pear with this volume. that she could find
some portion for every fault and failure.
So that when the active principle became
little silent she would set il in motion
most rapidly, so that had neither rest nor
peace. This, however. | managed to keep
to myself, as did not want my mother TO
know how seriously the old volume effect.
ed my mind.
But will no, delan the reader with any
further rehersal Of my accumulated woes
that augmented yearly, that often drove
me in the silent watches OF the night to
the grave of my father, to pour out the
bitterness of gtef alone. But will briefly
state, that alter trying every means that
art could devise, and every stratagem that
the enemy OF souls could suggest, grew
weary of all these ptifu subteriuges, and
then, and not ill then, turned my feet to
the law and testimony of God as clearly
revealed in that old Book; there found
what to me seemed altogether inexplicable:
That God could be just and the justfier Of
the ungodly This one truth, was of in.
6nitely more value to me than all had
ever heard or known before. "God so
loved the world that he gave his only be.
gotten son to die, that whosoever believeth
on him, might not perish, but have eternal
lile." This truth believed, relied upon,
broke my shackles, unbound my chain,
and set mo free. Thank God the star OF
hope then rose. trust never TO set. until
lost in the full blaze of an eternal sun.
Years have fed. since this happy occur.
renee took place; yet the scene, the place,
is still as vividly bright, as green, in my
memory as the events of yesterday. Yes.
far more so. felt then. that was mex.