The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1853-08-24
Sam Slick Again.

Sam Slick Again.
There is to be another series of Judge
Haliburton's famous sSam Slick" This
new wrinkle seems to be series Of adyen-
lures in search Of wife, which cannot fail
to bring out his peculiarities to very strik-
ing advantage. From his s'Introductory
Letter." dated "Slickville, April, 1852
we gather his general
TRAVELLING NOTIONS.
"My rule is to let every one skin his own
foxes. 1t aint worth while to ryle if you
can help it, especially at things you can I
alter or cure. Grumblin' and growlin'
along the road, fndin' fault with this. and
scoldin' at that is poor way TO travel. 1t
makes toll of a pleasure.
"Now, an Englishman goes through the
Journey Of life like bear with sore head,
as cross as Old Scratch himself. The
roads are bad, the horses bad, the inns
bad, and the bill extortionate. He can't
eat home made bread, the eggs aint poach-
ed right. the ham is hard. and he hates pork
as bad as a Jew. The veal is staggerin'
bad, and mutton rank or poor, the tea is
nothin' but chopped hay and water; cot
ton sheets, though they be white and clean,
only fit for summer house cloths; he can't
stand taller candle-the smell pysens
him. A wood fire puts his eyes out, roasts
one side of him while the other is raw and
cold. Even the gals amt pretty; if they
blush when he stares at them, he says its
bad sign-,hey know too much; and if
they don't, he says they are forrard and
impedent; but he goes right off into fit
at seein' me turn an egg into wine glass.
When see him in one o. them ere tam
trums, twichin' Of his face and jerkin
about Of his limbs arter that fashion, like
one possessed by ST. Vitus' dance, / call
for my horse, and say to the gentleman
that keeps the inn, Friend says I, 'get
some help, and hold the poor misfortunate
strangers head, arms and legs down so
he can't hurt himself; clap piece OF wood
across his mouth to keep him from bitin ,
Of his tongue, give him large dose Of
spirits OF turpentine. and put him to bed.
That's all that can be done for him, for he
is incurabls. Good mornins. and | makes
tracks. Such critter as that returns home
commonly with no more knowledge aud
manners than when he set out. The i'm.
agination has a shadop as ,oezI as The body,
that keeps Just little ahead of you, or
foliows close behind your heels; 1t aoont do
to let it frighten you. Blue-nose is nearly
as bad and ugly in his ways as John Bull.
Zone Of them said to me onct down to
Nova Scotia: 7 s'.
"Oh. Mr. Slick, aint il dreadful journey.
in here in the spring. There is noihin'
but veal, veal, veal, for everlastingly TO eat.
am ac,illy starved to death.
"Seis |, Friend, SO was l at first; / ca,
Of so many calves one spring, | was ac-
tually ashamed TO look q COW in the face
for six months; but at last found there
was more ways Of dressin' veal than one,
and more things 10 be had to eat II you
know'd what to ask for. Folks always
give me the best they have, and when that's
the case | always say, them that aint con.
tent with the best that can be got had bet.
ter 60 without, for there is no compulsion
in it. Grmmbln' spiles the relish and
hurts the digestion. Tell you what friend:
The bee though he finds euery rose has a
thorn. comes back loaded Nth honey from
his ram6les; and aohy shOuzda't other tour.
lists do the same? That's the way TO shor-
travlin' pleasant
"Cheap ,alkin'. Mr.. Slick,'' said he,
"but amt used to it; and if / once reach
my comfortable home, catch me leavin' i,
again for such an ou,landish place as this.
am halt frozen to death with the cold''
"Well," says I (for knew more of him
than he dreamed of,) '.it is cold that's a
fact; and it's lucky for you. you have a
comfortable home-though have known
many mans house made too hot for him
sometimes afore now. For my part I'd
as leaf travel as stay at home with scold-
in wife, cryin' children, and smoky
chimney"
''If you'd seed the puzzled look he
gave to my innocent face. 'twould have
done you good. 1t was just as much as
to say: Confound them random shots. |
VOW you hit me that time, though you
didn't take aim.'' Them's the sort of fel-
lers that makes the greatest fuss at hotels
always. If trauclers hare to put up with
a good deal sometimes, so haze innkeepers
too, that's a fact.
"a nigger, now, is a pattern man. He
sings bits Of songs, or plays on the Jews
harp, or whistles all the way, throws stones
at the birds, mocks the squirrels chirrupin'
out Of fright at his black face; and when
the little dogs rush out Of the houses and
bark at him as he passes along, he stops,
bow.wow at them, and chases them home
again, and then roars out larfin till the
woods fairly ring with his merry yagh.
yagh, yagh.
"At night, the way he tucks in his sup.
per is caution to boa-constructor, for
it would give him the dyspepsy.
"Free quarters are pleasant things for
them who haint got nothin' to pay with, so
next day he oversleeps himself on pur.
pose, and instead Of finding fault with his
accommodation, finds fanl! with his own
feet, and pretends for to limp. and the
children won't let him go. Afore dinner,
says he: "Mlssis, lend me the axe. please,
! till chop you up q lovely lotof fire. wood,
and split enough kindlin' stuff to heat the
oven for week." and the way he makes
chips fly aint no matter.
..Then he turns to and piles it up in the
porch snug, and fetches in great big
backlog the chimney place will hardly