Meigs County telegraph. [volume] (Pomeroy [Ohio]) 1848-1859, 1853-04-19
Foua Hrony sh;rt collars are an the

ing has proved very profitable to the
linen and starch trade. Short-necked
people, in order to keep pace with
the spirit Of improvement, should get
their ears moved up little higher
To MAKE A NIeHTMARE.-Just be-
fore going to bed, eat two pigs feet
and fried pie. In less than an hour
you will see snake larger than
hawser, devouring six blue eyed child
rem, who have just escaped from mon
ster with sorrel eyes and red-hot
evercoat.
A celebrated remedy is thus pufed:
A customer called to-day to say
that his wife accidently dropped lit
tie of your celebrated hair oil on her
entry floor last night, and this morn
ing she discovered splendid hair mat
in the entry.
TAKE IT CooL--"Your house is on
fire sir" said q stranger, rushing into
the parlor of a sober citizen.
"Well, sir" was the reply Of the lat
ter, "to what cause am l indebted for
the extraordinary interest which you
take in the affairs of my house?"
A fellow having spite against a
sausage maker, rushed into his shop
when crowded with customers, threw a
large dead cat on the counter, and said,
chat makes nineteen; we'll settle when
your not 50 busy and made his exit.
He was of course, soon followed by the
amateurs, empty handed
Weak doses of wash-board are now
recommended by physicians for ladies'
who complain of dyspepsia, Young
men troubled in the same way can be
ured by strong preparation Of wood
saw.
Miss BURDETT CoUTs, the wealthiest
heiress in the world, has been chosen
a Fellow Of the Geological Society of
London" She is, probably, the only
lady to whom respectful letter could
be addressed, commencing "My dear
fellow"
An exchange paper says, the most
digni6ed, glorious, and lovely work Of
nature, is woman, the next man, then
Berkshire pigs.
A sharp Attorney asked a little boy
who was testifying, if he knew what
would become of him if he told a lie
The lad answered with simplicity,
eyes sir-I suppose I shall be sent
where all lawyers go, when l die.
Timon says that when men marry
nowadays, they get more whalebone
than woman, and more coffee bags than
tin. About these days Timon should
avoid broom-handles.
1t is not always a mark of franknesG
to possess an open countenance. Al
alligator is deceitful creature, and yet
he presents an open countenance wher
he is in the very act Of "taking yor
in."
"Youhavn'topenedyo your mouth dur
ing the whole session." complained
member Of the Massachusetts Legisla
ture, to a Representative from tn
same town. oh, yes, I have,' was tn
reply; 81 yawned through the whole o
your speech on the liquor bill
A CURIOUS FAcT.-A modern phi
losopher, taking the motion of tn
earth on its axis at:seventeen mile
second, says, that if you take o.
yourhat in the streetto bow to a frien(
you 60 seventeen miles bareheadet
without taking cold.
A man whom DR.. johnson once rt
proved for following a useless and d.
morlizing business, said, in e1cus,
"you know, Doctor that I must live.
This brave old hater of everythin
mean and hateful, cody replied, tn;
"he did not see the least necessity
that"
A CAUTIOUS FELLow.-A few day
ago, in Berwick, Me-, a good homes
looking country fellow was looking ;
the telegraph wires with astonishmen
A passer-by asked him what he though
Of it. "Waal, I don't know exactly
replied the fellow, "but l am sure the
won't get me to ride on the darne
thing-them thar wires and pos
would tear my breeches all to pieces
The New Orleans Picayune relat
an anecdote Of a man in that city, wh
being seized with dangerous symptom
was advised to take an ounce of branC
a dow hut not havinor scales IN whif