Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1853-07-27
JOKER'S BUGET.
Mapping"

i
We had sweet dream the other night,
.s.-e When all around was still |
We dreamed we saw host of folks
Pay up their printers bill
0tr"I think our church will last good many
years yet,v said waggish deacon to his minister
II see the sleepers are very sound"
. esF Foote, being scolded by a lady, said, ri
have heard of tartar and birthstone, you are the |
cream of one and the flower Of the other"
or What kind of pigs cannot be driven? Pigs
that are lead.
GF The great race between the nightmare and
the clothes-horse came off yesterday. The man
who entered the mare wasn't wide awake-so the
horse. being up and dressed, took the prize. "
or Rum is like death-it levels all distinctions.
An Alderman with "brick in his hat would as
soon fraternize with chimney sweep as foreign
envoy.
nr One of Jacobs horse pistols had two colts
the other day. They will be exhibited at the
Worlds Fair.
Or Speaking of the death of an aged man, one
of the papers says, che retained remarkable pos
session of all his mental faculties down to within
few miles of his residence 70
0FAn English traveller reports that Yam
kee would separate from his wife if she neglected
to give him molasses to eat with his pork.
or FEphraim says courting is done on printing
principles there being good deal of the hand
press work about it.
..HrA fellow in Iowa jumped SO high the other
day, that he says he the dog star wag his tall
rfts g.. - ( Z.
feaTIf woman don't want her hair to fall out,
she should Be careful not to ssfall out with her
husband more especially ifhe wears red hair, and
Keeps possession Of sanguinary temperament.
n1T Among the curosities. which will be ex-
hibited at the worlds fair is leather watch, the
production of our friend Jacobs. The main
spring is India rubber, while the works are com
posed of gutta percha The whole is woundu up by
two boys and abed-wrench, Sim is evidently a
genius.
.fsT A friend of ours placed and eggplant un-
der a goose the other day, and hatched out twelve
Shanghas and top-not. Whether this will lead
to any revolution in the poultry market is yet to
be seen.
GrThe man that undertook to wrestle with a
gallon ofrum, met with most signal defeat
throw somerset. IT.
Ger"Ifsh wasn't for hope the heart would
break az. Mrs Perkins said when she buried her
seventh husband and looked anxiously among
the crowd for another.
eF The best cure for melancholy is anger
We once knew fellow who was saved from sui
eide by just pulling his nose.
or When the Princess Helena was born, ii
was told to the Princess Royal that she had got q
young sister.
eoh, that is delightful" cried the little innocent
royalist. "Do let me 60 and tell mammal"
GA country editor drops the disinterested
observation:-"Bles are they who do not ad-
vertise, for they will rarely be troubled with GUS
toner's
DrT.Oh mother,' said little child, "Mr. S
does love aunt Lucy-he sits by her---he whis-
pers to her, and he hugs her. "Why, Edward
your aunt don't suffer that, does she!' "Sufe'
that! No mother, she loves it." -.1n4.
t1sFA short man became attached to IA very
tall woman and somebody said he had fallen in
love with her
ssDo you call that falling in love9' said an old
bachelor. t.It is more like climbing up to it,
eGT. A singular old gentleman conceived him
self overcharged in surgeons BILL and sent word
rtRe serVantof the practitioner to his master,
"That for medicine he would, but as for his visits
he would return them.'
! & r
:0F A farmer who recently had his butter sez-
dby the clerk of the market for short weight,
gave us reason that the cow from which the
butter was made was subject to cramp, and that
caused the butter to shrink in weight.
GA wag on reading that in certain engage
ment Dey and two Knights were killed, remark
ed that was what he called killing time with {
vengeance.
lT They have rather steep prices on the 18th
mus. A friend writes to US from Gorgona, that he
paid two dollars for sleeping four hours on mat
trass stuffed with corn cobs and broken bottles
He would have done better, we think, at the mex
swamp.
The people of Peru are so indolent tina
they open pea pods with an oyster knife. Il
driving horses they always have two men to eac
qdadruped-one to hold the reins, and one to hol
Ter sWhoa."