Muscatine journal. [volume] (Bloomington, Iowa) 1849-185?, 1853-11-11
Humorous,

ty girl, was taken out with considerable difficulty.
Woman is q beautiful flower, that can be told in
tie dark even by its (s)talk.
-Suggs inquired of the Snowman II his "tall
fowls were coch in Africa only Coch in China !'
An Affirmative given.
The man who "embraced a favorable opportunity -
embroidered by his success attempted to embrace an
cid maid, but was put hrs du combat and came off
with black eye.
Tho following is true copy of sign upon
an academy for teaching youth in of the Western
States
FREEMEs HucGs, SCHOOL TEACHERS.
Freeman teaches the boys and Hugs the girls.
We have ever found that blacksmiths ore,
mere or less given to rce Carpenters for the most
part speak plainly but they will cts when thsv ret
chance. Not unfrequently, they are borcs and Of
ten annoy one with their old sors.
Charley Grab took field to plant at halves.
At harvest time the owner for his share of the
produce but the wag told him very cooy that he was
sorry there was nothing for him, the land did not
half.
a waggish apprentice one day after dinner
stepped up to his master, and asked him what he val
ued bis services at per day.
"Why, about six cents" said his master.
"Then, said the boy, putting his hand into his
pocket and drawing out some coppers "here's three
cenis-l'm eff on q bender"
-DEFIMrIoHs NOT FOUND Ii THE DICTIONARY
l1cuf--S0metnlng swallowed by dog.
Betroth- Elizabeth in passion.
Mystic-A stick belonging to me.
Policy--I en- looking at Polly.
Mifnatched-A lady engaged to be married.
Noticed-A glass of punch without ice.
Punish-Some of the asove definitions.
-FIRsr AFTER Allan Irish gentleman hav-
ing party to NEST at tavern, exclaimed on arriv-
ing, finding the room empty
$50 am first after ALL"
Tbe waiter informed him that he was mistaken
that his friends had been there, hut were gone.
VERY we'll, replied the Hiberpiap "then 7 have
made 40 mistake for as they were all here before
me, purely was right in saying was first after ar
a BIBLICAL RsPUrArIos.-One of the Boston
Museums old and valued correspondents, Mr.. Lord.
who is now residing in llliRss, was short time since
riding from Jacksonville to PEORIA in that State and
a. be was passing small hut BY the roadside, he no.
ccd shaggy headed boy Of about eight years of age
with large eyes and hat dressed In worn out pair
of bis fathers trousers, trying to balance himself on
the splintsred top Of hickory stump.
More for the purpose Of breaking the monotony Of
riding all day without speaking, than to gain nfor-
nation, Mr. Lord reignsd his hsrse up 70 the fence
and exclaimed
"My little boy, can You tell me how far il Is to
Sangamon Bottom 20
The by poifei himself on one leg opened bis large
eyes to their largest extent, and replied:
"Bout six miles reckon
"po you live in that house?" inquired Mr.. Lord.
II reckon" was the reply.
~ yos en'oy yourselves out here In the woods 2"
"What ails your pants 2" say@ Lord.
tTore en-" was the laconic answer.
Finding that be had hold of genius that couldu I
be pumped Mr. Lord turned his head to depart but In
his turn was hailed BY the boy, who, in oomical,
half reluctant tone, exclaimed
"What mout your name b ."
"Lnd, was the reply.
The boy here grinned all over even to the wrinkles
in his fathers trosers, and seemed hardly able to
suppress broad snicker.
,'You seem pleased said Lord, "perhsps you new
Or heard the name before"
pop read about yow ?"
Lord put spurs to his horse, and says that even the
sacred thoughts 70 which the incident gave ro were
net sufficient TO keep him from snickering, through.
ont tie rest Of the Journey.
A Parody.
Oft in the Silly night,
When sumber's chain has bound me
feel the korrid bite
OF something crawling round me-
The FRANKS, the sprces, OF bugs and heas,