The weekly Minnesotian., 1853-01-08
THE MINNESOTIAN.
The First CroxS Word,

"lou seem happy. Annette, always. have
never been in house where the husband and
wife seemed more so.''
"Well done, Kate" said Mrs. Huntingdon
laughing, ''yOu have used the word seem only
twice in that short sentence. And now you
nave begging way about you, as if you were
really in earnest to hear something about mar.
ried life before taking the fatal STEP 1t is well
Harry is not here to see the look of sadness in
the eye of his bride elect He might fancy her
heart was full of misgivings, instead of wedding
finery.n
Don't laugh at me, Annette; talk with me
as you used to do. 1 love Henry, you know
and yet have many misgvings about married
life. see SO few who are really happy in this
relatiOn-I mean happy as l should wish to be-
You seem to come nearer to it than any one
else. Do you ever"
Quarrel? No, not often now. We had oul
breaking in. l believe it must come to all
sooner or later"
"Do tell Inc all about it, will you, Annette?"
eyes, if you are very desirous of it. You
may learn something from it,"
IL was romantic girl, as you we'll know
Kate. Some few friends had, whom loved
dearly but these friendships did not quite sat
lsfy my heart. Something more it craved
hardly knew what, until loved my husband
when we were first married, l used sometimes
to ask myself: Now, do l find in this life all
which expected to find? Am as happy as !
thought should be? My heart has always re-
sponded yes, and more so. With us the romance
of married life, if may call it so held on long
time: For my part, was conscious of pleas
urable excitement of feeling when we were to-
gether. l enjoyed walking and riding alone
with him. The brightest hours of the day were
| those in which we sat down alone together to
talk or toread. For a long time / felt gentle
restraint in his presence. liked to be becon1-
ingly dressed. When dull, | made an effort to
be sociable and cheerful if he was present. l
had great fear of getting into the way of sit
ting down stupidity with my husband or of hav-
ing nothing to talk about but the children and
the butchers bill. made a business of remenl-
bering every pleasant thing which | read OR
heard or thought, to tell him, and when all
these subjects were exhausted, we each of us
had a hobby we could ride, so that we were
never silent for want of something to say
Thus we lived for year or two. was very
happy. think people were often surprised to
see us continue to enjoy each others society
with so much Zest
But there was this about it. AS yet had
nothing to try me. We were boarding. l had
no care, and his tenderness and interest was u
sovereign panacea for the little ails and rough
ness which must fall to us in our best estate
This could not last forever, however. He be-
came more and more occupied in his business,
and | at length had house and baby to look
after. Then, for the first time, our mutual for
bearance was put to the test Hitherto, we had
been devoted to each other; now the real cares
of life pressed upon us so as often to really alb
sorb our energies. | was the first to feel the
change. 1t seemed to me as if something was
OvershadOwing u.s. Sometimes l would get
sentimental, and think he did not love me as he
once did. As look back now, am convinced
| that here was my first tcrOng STEP Indulgence
in these moods weakened my resolution. II
was an injustice to him, of which ought not tc
have been guilty. 1t left me too with wound
ed feeling, as ifI had been wronged. which be.
gan to affect my spirits
Once, had for some time carried about this
little sore spot in my heart. kept the matter
all to myself, for l was in part ashamed, and in
part too proud to speak Of it. Here was anoth-
er wrong step. There is no security of happi-
ness in married life but in the most perfect con-
fidence.
There came q season of damp, chilly weather
One morning got up feeling very irritable.
had taken cold my head ached and my baby
had been worrisome during the night In my
kitchen | had cross, ignorant servant girl
and on this particular morning she had done
her very worst for breakfast. The beef steak
was burned to a cindcr; the eggs were like
fee, which was our mainstay, was execrable.-
My husband was very patient with all this until
it came to the coffee, and this upset him. He
put his cup down, and said in a half veXed tone,
Il do wish we could ever have any good coffee.
Annette, why cannot you have it made as my
mother does?"
This was the drop too much for me, and l
boiled over. "YOu never think anything on
our table fit to he eaten," said 1, and almost
started at the sound of my own voice-'.yOu
had better live at home if you are not satisfied,
or else provide me with decent servants.
cannot do everything-take care of my baby all
night, and get the breakfast tOo'
Il did not know before that was so very un-
reasonable" said he in tone of injured feeling.
He sat few minutes then rose, left his untast-
ed breakfast, put on his hat and went off.
When heard the door shut behind him, all
my temper left me. Invent to my room, locked
myself in, sat down and cried like child
This was the first cross word had ever spoken
to my husband. 1t seemed to me as if some
sudden calamity had befallen u.s. l worked
myself up to such pitch of feeling, that
walked about the room wringing my hands.
80, it is all over with u.s." thought l :; I've
shall never be happy again in this world. =
This thought made me unspeakably miserable.
l felt as if a black pail had fallen around me,
and in the future there was only blank
darkness. In my misery l sought to comfort
myself by blaming him. ale need not have
spoken SO to me, at any rate" said |, out loud
"he might have seen how felt; it was too
much for any one to bear. 1t really was not
one bit kind in him. 1t is plain enough that he
does not care for my comfort as he once did,
Then, to be always telling me what nice things
his mother cooks, when he knows / am trying
to do my very best to learn to please him! 1t
is really too badr'
don't look so dreadfully sober, Kate. Ny
baby cried just here, and had to run before l
was through with my catalogue of grievances,
yet / had gone far enough to get well on the
wrong track again. l began to calm myself
with the reflection that if there had been great
wrong done, | was not the only one to blame
for it. was dreadful sorry that had spoken
cross to him, but thought he ought to be sorry
too. Before my baby had finished crying,
came to the conclusion that would not exhibit
signs of repentance until saw some in him.
So bathed my face that no traces of tears
might remain, dressed myselfwit unusual care,
and went down to old Bridget, to give some
very particular directions about the dinner.