The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1853-02-05

'o'''r' Percei'e tnat IL Is NOT prerlSely
SNAPPED too short. madam, quite too short
not well finished off, bv anv means. And
what do You mean. madam bv having the
thing so much larger at one end than the 9th.
er Where, ask, is vour idea of symmetry D.?
BOUNDS, madam, if this is the bcs, Won can
do in that department, shall Law the mex,
MI self"
Mrs Bddn, with her claw in her eve
Please, couldn't help it. didn's mean To-"
Q. e. ESP. (molIifed) We'll. we'll, don
fret Your gizzard You're no chicken. mad
am to he 80 sensitive about tritle; onlv rr-
member my advice in future, and above all,
remember that the crowning virtue of hen
hood is disintrre>t-dncss
Mrs. B'day (meckly) "bave a worm,
DEAR"
y, e. Esp, (solcmnlv,) II will"
SCENE THIRD.
Mrs Bildv c. has been setting for three
weeks, O.C. Esq, appears in tho distance,
parting pifh one of his numerous female
friends; the tones of his voice fall family on
Mrs Bidly's ear.
q. e. Esq. And now. sweetest of hens,
farewell and NAV all the stars of heaven.
and all the saints of the BARNARD. meet to
register the LAY when your smile first dawn
ed upon nv dreary life, and made mt the
happlest of ROSTERS Farewell"
u I. wends his homeward way. Good
evening, Jack mons.rous fine hen, that
just been parting from her. Or, NAV be
YOU did not notice her points Quite fond
ofm', too assure YOU. Still in tears, YOU
will oi'Serve-ah"m. Cork-a-ioo,lr-loo,' :"
=. {. reaches the domestic nest.
Mrs B'idy, Qteebly.) "Oh, am SO glad to
have anybody speak to. | havnt stepped
oil the nest. nor seen creature since sunrise.
How do You do, nv dear, ANYTHING new
going on i'll the ward Z"
long pause o. {. E,1.. appears to lie
suddenly overwhelmed with depression and
silent gloom
Ms Diddy, What, the matter. sir"
Mrs Biddy gets tiisety on her nest oh
dear me. I'm 50 tired :"
Silence for half an hour.
Ms. 3. (in gentle desperation My dear,
d" You think You would mind lookin. TO the
nest minute, while ! run and pick little
bit Of something? hav'n, taken a mouthiu
tolay"
q. & Is? (sfartng up in ,loni't) NAL
am, have heard ari-ht: Do understand
that You have distinctly offered to shift upon
YOUR husband the little duties of tn. tomcstr
nest Do you mean 10 bc a hens right, hen,
madam Have | not again and arain I'M
pressed upon your mind, that female selfish
ness alone is at the bottom of these impiou.
doctrines? And what, on the contrary, ac-
cording to the decision OF all roostrr-kind.
should be the real pride and ambition of hem
hood? Dsintrrestedness; a true hen alorirs
in little crosses and trials: for without temp
tatIonS she perceIyes there can be no virtue
without trials. no patience; without atflirtion.
no resignation, which is ALWAYS so lovely in
the female character 4 true hen, situated
as YOU are, would not on!y rejoice that Prov
ldence had seen fit TO perfect her with trials,
but, with that beautiful selt-abneg gation VIII, h
tan never be too strcnuou,ly inculraicd bv
rooStcrkind, would set herself TO planning
new sacrifices; | say true hen in YOUR stu
alton, instead of sneaking from her little du-
ties, would conlriyc some plan OF only by
reaching out her head, and picking the earth
around herr for supplying her husband, little
wants"
Ms, Bdddy, (meckly) Have worm.
dear"
q. C. E<? (Solcmnly.) Il will"
0. C. Esq. Cn terrible voice, and walk
ing like Othrllo,) "Nantr, ma'lam behold W
Gns-rts his bill under his left wing, and pro-
duces a ROSTERS tail feathcr) "Do YOU rec
ocnlze that, maiam: DO YOU acknowledge
an acquaintance with the chicken hearted cat
lift who dropped il? Are YOU aware that
found it within three feet of the domestic
nest? ?"
Mrs Biddy, Qanguidly.) did you? !
didn't notice it."
O. C. Esq. Peace hen. and listen while
in calm but decisive terms strive to impress
upon YOUR mind the cnormitv of YOUR conlurt.
Has it not been decided, ask Won, calmly.
madam, has it no, been the opinion of rooster
kind for ages. and i. it not therefore unlena-
bic, that (after disintercsie,,ness) the one
thing neetl.ul to the female character is ex-
ce.sive mo,le>tv? 4 true hen Is 50 strictly
and severely virtuouS. that the slightest at
tempt at intimacy from one Of an improper
sex. though disguised beneath the specious
mask Of friendship, will excite in her breast
thu EXTREMIST aversion and horror On the
contrary, what do find to be the case in re-
gard to Yourself: Only yesterday, on re-
turning unexpectedly from little party, |
beheld YOU in animated conversation with NV
brother, IIca, ems madam. ain ! TO ir lonr-
cr the victim of such duplicity? NJ. sonnrr
would | sacrifice at once the domestic neat.
and fling thy liteless bolv-oh oh mise
ry! violence, revenge, 'Frailty thy name i,
bo,rn