Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1853-09-22
AlisrcIIancous.
Aunt Becky, the Ailiug Woman,


The following article Is capital descrip-
ton of class who are always ailing aud
always dociorng
Becky Ssson was an invalid by profess
sion. She was one Of those people who ZEN
Ioy miserable health" II we might trust
her own account IN the matter she had
every variety of disease Galen ever dreamt
Of Not neigbbor could have the head
ache, rheumatism. or dyspepsia, the back
ache or the gout, but Aunt Becky knew all
abou, It she was troubled IN JUS, the same
way herself The Oldest nhabiant new
er remembered The time that Becky Ssson
was well she was never remembered to
have been even better. Some uncharita-
bic people would hint, 10 spite OF her " p-
sc dixit," that she was well enough, If she
would but think so, and let alone DOCTOR
ing.
Let alone doctoring For such "a mag
unanimous selEdenlal, Aunt Becky had no
disposition. Years before ! was ushered
into this mortal world, the habit had be-
come life settlement. Her ailments were
her property; her peculiar requisites; her
outfit for the voyage of life. Her eyes
turned inward, searching for aches, pains.
cramps, and stitches No pointer was ever
better on a scent than Aunt Becky she
was forever nosIng around for some new
disorder to make capital Of; wi en- found.
she was perfectly certain that was what was
the matter with her. Sic had passed thro'
all the premontory symptoms, and was al
ready possessed of every legitimate ache
aud pain lad down IN the books. With
scrupuous care and nice accuracy, she
watched for further Developments.
Becky Ssson would have been a rare
catch. had she lived in this age of the pa
thes." She could tell how many times she
had coughed. winked, or sneezed during
each twenty-ionr hours like watchdog
she slept with one eye open, lest something
should escape her. But she lived when her
" enjoyment " of miserable health cost her
something, and she believed, too, ia treat
ing a case actively. OIL and SIENNA had
10 her ulfaclorIes, the ordor of sweet
smelling SAVIOR, aud rhubarb, quinine, aud
salts were as familiar TO her as her daily
food
Not a doctor within twenty miles ride
but that knew Becky SIssou for an NJ ID
affixed to persons name possessed to Aunt
Becky peculiar Specification. |, was a
mystic symbol, a sign for her to reverence,
aud stralghtway her poor body that "lyIng
IN hospital" that "house of refuge" for the
whole category OF " Ills that flesh is heir 10, !"
was offered up ireewill offering 10 the yills
of wrath, powders and lotions, blisters and
poullces. Yet some medical men did hint
in private, that brown bread pills suited
Becky Sisson best She knew which doc
tor had the sharpest lancets, and who drove
the fastest horses She could tell a sulky
a mile off, aud had even been known 10
make her manaefs to Ps,r Of saddle
bags"
No one knew exactly Becky Sisson's
age that was forbidden subject, point
about which she was nervous yet, if one
might Judge from what she had passed
through" we might safely conclude that
Melhusaleh's hour-gass had fallen as an
heirloom to the Sisson's family, for the par
,icular benefit of such of It's members as
"enioyed" miserable health Becky Sisson
nigh, have been pretty in her youth; she
might have been fair when she was baby /;
bu, as remember her, her complexion was
sort of compound ei cheese and putty,
the result of bile aud opium The long
habi, Of complaint had given an angular
expression to her whole face, her lips we're
drawn down at the corners, as though The
weight of the tales of woe which they had
reclted had been too much FOR them. Her
voice, too, had that nasal twang significant
of those people who enjoy miserable
health" half draw, half whine like crack
ed bassoon.
Many time has some one of US children
been called from our first nap 10 run for the
doctor, "Tell him TO come quick, for
cant live So" was ever her parting inIunc-
ton; aud yet she must have surprised her
self, for she did live so. Just so, for full
twenty years. To see Aunt Becky undress-
ed, one would supposed she had served in
the old French war, aud in the Revolution
beside, for her whole frame, the A." house she
Hved an" was scanned, SCARED, and indenl'
ed into as many lines and angles as school
map; indeed, il was as atlas 10 Aunt Becky