The daily dispatch. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1884, 1852-04-15
MAX sToLPRIAU.
A TALE OF BAsHFULNEss.

TALE OF BAsHFULNEss
There is ceriain misfortune in the world
not usually enumerated in the list of common
misf0nunes, but which, nevertheless, ought to
be. | afford living illustration Of my asser-
ton.
Ny father, God rest his soul, sent me dill
gently to school; there | gained some knowl-
edge, although our city schools at that period
were none of the best. 8
Every one said: Max has talent, but he is
shy and awkward. cannot adapt himself to the
why's of the world, is unacquainted with the
usages of society, and never knows what to do
with his hands and feet; otherwise he is good
and clever fellow enough.
Such was the general opinion Of me. Reader,
do you perceive my failing My worldly edu-
cation was defective. DiIigent at school and
10 the worship; l was uncleanly ana egligent
of my attire; was civil, obliging, and honest,
but bashful withal, so that 1 ran off when un-
known persons approached; my eyes never
knew where to look for resting place when
addressed by stranger, and called on to meet
a lady with civility and politeness, | became
rooted to the spot, speechless and stiff as a
ramrod.
Enough:-politeness and ease Of manner, as
they are called, are concerns no less pertain
ing to life's comfort, than bread and potatoes
or glass of wine.
Many young gentlemen, as have often OBJ
served, are greatly wanting in these respects.
Many one in going into society is sadly at a
loss how to dispose of their extremiiies, and
would, one can easily perceive, have much
rather have left them at home. Many such an
unfortunate knows mol where to, quarter his
hands, thrusting them at one moment into his
waist-coat, at another into his breeches pockets,
then in despair raising the one or the other to
his occiput, there to scratch by way of variety.
Among other i'll luck entailed by my awk-
wardness, may be reckoned that of being still
a bachelor, of having reached my fifty -second
year without being blessed with wife.
No sooner was my old Aunt dead, and her
sole heir, thereby rendered comparatively
affluent, than |, then in my tiirtieth year, was
led to seek the hand of young lady, who,
TO other qualifications, added beauty, virtue,
amiability, and wealih besides. s
l was pleased with pretty Barbara; matters
were quickly arranged. and nothing remained
but to cultivate the acquaintance. l was ac-
cordingly to meet her at the house of her
cousin, and an invitation to dine was forwarded
TO me. E.L atss sa W
Oflarge parties / had perfect horror, my
education made me shy and tmid. but then
whatwill not man do TO secure the favor Of
pretty Bail bafa? So put on my best Sunday
suit, white silk stockings, bran new hair-bag
In word, | made myself as smart as BRIDE
groom. .gi
On reaching the door of the cousins house,,
however, my heart began to thump against my
ribs us though had a smithy within my beast.
H"If could only feel assured there will not be
a party, though l would to Heaven it was
over" Fortunately found the cousin alone
making up an account in his study. "You
are somewhat late. friend Stolpriau," said he.
made twenty inciinations right and LETT, and
laughed in perfect agony 10 look agreeable,
for The fear OF meeting large party engrossed
every thought
for some sand. Anxious to be Of service, !
rushed forward, seized, as i'll luck would have
il, the inkstand instead OF the sand box, and
poured a whole stream of the best writing finid
over the ne atty kept ledger. thought should
Immediately faint from sheer fright, and IN my
confusion hurriedly diew forth my snow-while
handkerchief to wipe it up.
With an exclamation of"What on earth are
you doing there, friend Stolpriaui" my enter
iainer smiIingIy inteTposed, and pushing ma
and my black and white kerchief gently aside,
quickly put things to rights, tnen led the way
to the apartment where the company were as.
sembled. followed, but with troubled spi.
rt. and on looking down was horrifed TO ob.
serve an ink blot as large as forin on my left
white stocking. "Help me, Heavens" men
tally groaned, "what will the company
Think,
The room door is opened. !. awkward,
block headed booby that was, thinking %
show myself light and graceful, as well as
clever and gallant, sprang forward. bowIng
right and left, scrapiDg frat With one loot. then
with the other in oil directions. and perceivIng
female domestic just before, who was 10 the
act Of dishing up pie, dashing my head with
such force into her back - 10 send the pie
ayine out OF the dish on the door, and so with
comnli,nenis. and ducking aud bowing blindly,
advanced. ii felt 40 though | were in the bat.
IL. and about 10 rush on the encmy's guns,
Whatcivil things were said on The part Of The
company know not; 40 yet had not the
courage to look up, but cOnlinued like one
r,oesessed, b0wing and scrspiHg, calculating
ayour humble servant,n 10 ell directions, until
cut short by 4 fresh mishap.
/ had 10 fact reached The pie, which still isy
there, for the servant had NOT suihciently re-
covered from her fright and loss cf breath. ant
stood staring ~ the masser.piec< Of cooktuf
dashed % pisees on the door, without an s6os
10 remove il. sssss.. .ss sf l 81 (
An al once, while engaged ID making
fsesh inclination. my unIusiunats len loot van
| desed iato. thespassTy. !. lsAw ndNhiuk. or 81
| had become dark befofe ~ eYeex QisUuee
| fully, bul naturally ehoueh, ny foot cid lfoq
under me; ID an instant peraoqot and polleice
| halun-s wers Lost. and doWn csne ueaeos
| iug ny uhoIo iensth. .inef epe ~ eesens g
] ~ door. Il ~ ~ elall nla1n q 6olee ~ y