Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-08-11
Gaaatr,g GIurka6lua Arslater
rnE 7CRYsTAL nAsKEr.
by MAJOR JosHPn JoNEs. I

flood, leads to glorious fortin' but which
if it ketches a Teller in the ebb, plays the
mischief with him. Well Mr.. Shake
speare was a filosifer and knowd heap
about human natur' and wouldn't be |
afraid to venture something, if / was q
bettin man, on the fact that thar amt
real hopeless, confirmed old bachelor in
the world that haint experienced the truth
Of his remark. Their amt one of 'em but
can look back and pint out the time he
missed the 6gger, and can tell you the
very circumstances that knocked all ms
fat in the fire. The catastrofy of Bill
Hickson's love affair was very remark
able one, and must tell my readers about
it. .a a..' ~ e4idl !
Their was great excitement in Pine
vile. The ladys was gwine to have a
fair, fair to raise money to help to build
new church. 1t was the fust thing of
the kind that ever tuck place in Pineville,
and of course it produced a sensation.-
For more'n u month the gals in town had
been bizzy with their needles, and the
niggers was to be seen running from house
toulouse with patterns and little bundles
of things, and all the remnants of silk and
little ribbons had been bought out of the
stores to make tineries for the cumin' fair.
The whole business was under the mana
cement of old Mrs. Rogers, who made it a
pint TO keep every thing as secret as pos:
sible, till the night when the fair was to
be open to the public. Some of the boys
was monstrously put too to make out
what the fair meant, but it was generally
understood that it was to be very splen-
dcd affair, and everybody was to pay q
quarter of dollar to sec it, and no gen
tleman wasn't expected to come to it
thout bringing lady and pocket full
of money.
AT length the suspicious night arrived,
aud the fair with all its brilliant array of
fancy fixins, bust upon the bewildered
sense of the astonished Pinevilians. The
old church was in blaze of taller candles.
The walls was all hung round with green
bushes, and flowers, and on little tables
all round the room was displayed all sorts
OF tneries and gigamarees, more'n any
body know'd what to do with. At every
table was young lady dressed as killing
rs she could be, so that nobody could re-
fuse to buy any thing she offered 'cm,
without ever thinking of the price. Eve
1ybody in town was thar and the prettycst
gals had just as much as they could do TO
wait OH the gentlemen, selling 'em every
thing from pair ofbaby stockings to cup
OF coffee swectcncd with their own fingers
or love letter from their sweet-hearts,
what they had in little post office in
one cornor of'thc room.
Bill Hickson was thar of course, splur-
gin round with Tibitha Turner, bv-
In everything that she tuck fancy to-
Bill was one of the stingiest fellers in the
world, and was just the man to sell his
heart and soul for plantation and nir-
gers, and old Mrs. Turner was as rich as
cream, he was dead after her daughter
Iloltha, All the gals in town knowd
how Bill had courted all tho rich gals in
the county, and they hadn't much mercy
on him in the price, whenever Tabtha
wanted any thing at their tables. 1t was
like pulling the fellers eye teeth every
time they made him shell out dollar,
but that was the only revenge they could
have.
Tabitha had n good deal moro dollars
than she had sense, and was Just silly
enutt to make Bill buy all the baby toys
there was in the room and by the time
the TAR was near over she had bled him
pretty freely, 1t went monstrous hard,
but there was no SIGH thing as backing
out If he expected to get her fortin, which
was the main chance with him.
Bout two o'clock Bill proposed to 60
home, but Tabitha wanted to see it out.
Bout this time old Mr.. Montgomery went
up into the pulpit and told the company
that, on the part of the ladies who had
gin the fair, he thanked them very much
for their liberal patronage, and as Their
was few things left, he would offer 'em
at auction to close tho consarn. He said
he hoped the gentlemen present would
stay and bid for the articles.
All the plumber was gathered up from
the tables and carried to tho old gentle
man, who begun crying 'cm off at the
crowd who had all gathered round the
pulpit, each gal to the arm of gentle
man.
Bill stuck monstrous close 10 Tibtha,
for fear some other chap mought git to
buy sumthing for her, or what would be
worse, to go homo with her.
Mr.. Montgomery went on crying off
doll babys, and pin-cusions, and work
bags, and watch-papers, and baby clothes
and all sorts of things, till bimeby he
come to basket what took Miss Tabitha's
fancy monstrous.
All, ladys and gentlemen" scs Mr..
Montgomery, "here's a gem How
much for this butiful chrischial basket I?
Just look at tF' SEES he holding it up to
the light what made it shine like dimonds
IN all the colors of the rainbow.
Oh, my ses Miss Tabitha, "what
a beautiful thing Now you must buy
that forme Mr., Hiokson."
-" Jest look at it lodys and gentlemen"
SEES Mr., Montgomery, 7.''NN
cob, dear" ses Tabitha. "Wont
you buy that for me Mr., Hickson ?" 7
"To be sure Wilt scs Bill.
7" How much for this butiful basket.