Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1852-08-12

CURED Cara
/ Now, if Tom had been put on bis oath he
could no more have answered correctly. IA
regard to the appearance Of che weather.
i than the man in the moon, end not half Al
much, for it is fair 10 suppose that if there
be man in the moon. he isnot addicted Il
| the practice Of drinking, and therefore,
| keeps bright look out on things below.
He replied guardedly-s Pom my. word /
don't'know, but I'll look and, feeling M
way to the winHow, he threw aside the cur.
tains. and bSr of pale starlight threw Il.
self Immediately on his Wife's face. Clear
as crystal, you perceive, dear'-and down
went the curtain again
Clara was very thoughtful aud affection.
| ate, and suggested that If the~curtain was
kept up be could see his WY better about
| the room. - 4
No, no, dear replied Ton, very Slowly.
as before; Eve heard that Starlight produ.
ces lunacy after midnight he was about to
say, but caught himself dexterously, consid-
ering his situation-'an that's dreadful,
you know
Tom made several stumbles after this, and
presently his wife caught Whit Of the
cloves
Good gracious, Tom, how long you are,
and how dreadfuliy you smell Of cloves
Eng said Tom, starting-G l-ovesn
Yes, cloves ANY one would think YOU i
been embalmed like mummy
This made him twiteh aud go wool gath
ering
Phew you're regularly scented with
them. Where have you been to-night?'
Tom was thrown entirely off his guard :;
his brain rambled, and, without the remotest
idea of what he was saying replied
W.w.why -hic = Clara, dear, the fact is
have just been on tittte mp 10 Tie Eaa H.
dies, and irsiks q aoas there jctt oeer a spice
cor p
This told.a tale Clara Immediately sat
up in bed and she'd tears. The cat was out
OF the bag, and We SHOULD not be surprised
but that Caudle lecture as long as a char.
ity sermon was the consequence of poor
Toms unfortunate slip Of the tongue. He
has never touched cloves fro~-~-rN'pt day to
this, aud it is probable, ere long, NJ Mil a.
void the bottle entirely, his wife insisting
that every one that drinks must eooner or
later keep company with subterraneous
person, distinguished from the rest Of man
kind by remarkable species Of tail and a
cloven' foot this latter adornment would
keep Tom out of his road, if nothing else
succeeded. Most decidedly
THE FRESHMAN AND THEgDEAcoN.
a few months ago, as Deacon Ingalls,, of Swamp
scot, x l., was travelling through the western part
OF the State OF New York he Tell in with an irish
man who had lately arrived in this country, and
was in quest Of brother that came before him ard
settled in some Of the digsings in that vicinity
Pat was a strong athletic MANI a true
Catholic. and had naual. sAaIa -tLA IA-;---e
Sabbath morning that brother Ingalls, met
Pat, who inquired for the nearest road to
the church. 4
ingalls, was a good pious man He told
Pat he was going to church himself, and in
yited his new made acquaintance to accom-
pany him thither, his place of destination
being small Methodist meeting house near
by There was great revival there at that
time, and one of the deacoEs, {who, by the
way, was very small in stature,) invited
brother T. to take seat jim his pew. He
accepted the invitation and walked in, fol
lowed by Pat, who looked in vain to find
the altar. &C After he was seated he
turned to brother l., andin whisper which
could be heard all around inquired
''Sure, and isn't this hereto churcil2'f
"tIush?' said ingalls,, IF you speak
loud word they will put you out.
J.Divil word will | speak at all, replied
Pat
The meeting was opened with prayer by
the pastor Pat was cycling him very
closely, when presently an old gentleman
who was standing in the pew directly in
front Of Pat, shouted glory" "Ilis-st, we
clear, deyil,'' rejoined Pat, with lis loud
whisper, which was heard by the minister,
sbe dacent and don't make blackguard Of
yourself"
The parsons grew more and more feryent
in their devotions, Presently the deacon
uttered an inaudiblc groan "HisIst, .ye
blaekguard, have We no dacency at all, at
all ?H- said Pat, at the same moment giving
the deacon punch in the ribs, which caused
him to lose His equilibrium. The minister
stopped, and extending his hand IN sup
plieating manner, said, Brethren, We can
not be disturbed in this way, will some one
be kind enough to put that man out R"
Eyes, your reverence" shouted Pat, II
will"
And suiting the action to the weld, he
colard the deacon, and to the horror and
astonishmtnt of the pastor, brother ingalls,
and the whole congregation, he dragged him
through the aisle, and with tremendous
kick, a postsriori, as the logicians say, he
landed him in the yestibule of the church.
VALUE or MONEY.
If you want to learn the value Of money,
says the Knickerboeker, go and labor for a
day or two as a hod carrier, beneath the
scorching rays of summer sun This is an
excellent idea, and if many of our young
gentlemen had to earn their dollars in that
way, how much less dissipation and crime
| We would witness every, day. So of our
fashionable ladies, if they, like some Of the
4 poor seamstresses Of our large cities. had tc
earn their dollars BY making shirts at ten
1 cant an;aaa how mueh lose 6narx rva,,lJ -