davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08
A WHISPER TO GENTLEMAN.

Jupiter Ammon! don't l wish | was q
man, Just to show the masculines how to
play their part in the world little better!
In the first place, there amt mothers
son of you that has got as far as A B c.,
in the art of making love, land I've seen a
few abortions, in that way myself, as well
as the rest of our dear sisters.( What wo-
man wants to be told that her feet and
eyes are pretty or 'her form and smile
bewitchingn Just us if she didn't know
all her fine points, as soon as she is tall
enough to peep into looking glass!
No, you iueffable donkey, if you must
use the small coin of fattery to pay toll at
the bridge of her affection, let me whisper
secret in your long ears. Compliment
her upon some mental attractions, she
does not possess, (if You can find one and
don't wearc the knees of your pants thread
barn at her feet, trying to make her be-
lieve that she is your first love. We all
know that is among the first things that
were, after you were out of your jacket
and trowscrs.
What splendid husband (Fanny)
should make, to be sure, had Provi 'cnce
ordained it! Do YOU suppose whc,, the
mother of my glorious boys wanted IL six
pence to 6uv their shoe strings, I'd scrowl
ut her like a hyena, and pull my por; mo-
naie out ofmy pocket as if were pulling a
tooth! Do you suppose when her blue
eyes grew lusterlcss, and the rose ? sted
ON her fair check, trotting around the do
nestle tread-mill day after day, that I'd
come home at night, sulky and silent, and
smoke my cigar in her face till her eyes
where as red as rabbits or take myselfoff
to a club, or a game at nine pins, or any
other mame, and leave her to the eXhllar-
ting relaxation of darnin@ my stockings?
Do you suppose I'd trot along like a
loose poncv at her side in the street, and
leave her to keep up with me. or not, as
her strength would permit? Do you sup
pose I'd fly in passion, and utter words
10 crush the life from out her young heart,
and then insult her by offering her heal
ing plaster in the shape of Il new bon
net?
And don't you suppose when the ami
versarv of our wedding day come around,
III write dainty little note and leave on
her toilet table, and let her know l was
still a married lover?
Pshaw. I'm sick of you all! You don't
deserve the love ola generous, htgh-souled
womanl fyou want a housekeeper, hire
one and done with it. II you want wife
but you don't.
One woman will answer as we'll as anoth-
or TO sew on Your buttons, and straps: and
strings. and make your duddings, and--so
on, and so forth.
Do you suppose we have cultivated our
minds and improved the bright and glorl-
Gus gift of intellect TO the best of orr ca
pacity, to minister unto your physical
wants?-Not bit of it. When that's
over, we want something rational.
Do you ever think of that, you selfish
wretch when you sit with your feet upon
the mantle-Piece, reading the newspaper
all to yourself or sit from tea-time till ten
O'Clock, staring heTashes in the CRATE out
of countenance?
Lord Henry! If had such a block of n
husband, I'd scare up the ghost ola lover
somewhere if there is any wit in wo-
man.
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

A SrRAEsE, PrArns1E.--As few days
since, a lady Of our town narrated 70 Us
the following curious incident, which she
derived from q near relative the mother
of a bright little boy not year old
The child was, one day seated near the
edge Of the porch. a tablespoon with
which 70 amnse itself being placed in rs
hand.G asls.-,EregaIf y $50
After short time. tie mother happen
ed to look towards the babe, and percei.
we'd that il was. leaning over the porch,
and cautiously, extending the spoon 10.
wards the ground then suddenly With
drawing it with a hearty laugh. each
time that Il drew lis hand back. This
maneuvere the infant repeated frequent
ly; itsmother supposing Il 70 be playing
with kitten, paid no particular attention
TO It for the moment.
] st length, the child's frequent burst.
of laughter, and It's prolonged enjoyment
Of the sport in which it was engaged, in
, duced the mother to approach and lool
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

The WAR HoRsE IN BATrLE.-AmOng
the many and varied incidents of the bat
tie field not the least is the conduct OF
that noble animal the war-horse. Some.
on losing their riders, will still continue
their evolutions with the corps to which
they belong, or get a fresh rider, or ar
rested by the swift messenger of death.
Others plunge madly through the field,
treading down all before them, many
lying with their legs broken, unable TO
rise, and looking piteously for relief.-I
put several ofthese poor creatures out of
their misery by shooting them through
the head. There was one noble animal
resting on his launches, with his fore legs
extended, and his head erect, making re-
peated but Intellectual attempts to rise,
his hind legs were shattered by a cannon
ball; thinking to terminate his sufferings
more speedily, I placed the muzzle of my
piece close to his forehead and fired; L
was too close, however, the ball rebound
ed from the bone and wounded myselfin
the thigh slightly.
Another beautiful black horse, very
richly accoutred, was standing like stat
ue, and his late master, an officer of the
French cuirassiers, lying near him; we
wondered to see him so passive, and one
of our men mounted and urged him for
ward, when the first step was taken,
down came both together, the luckless RI
der measuring his length on the ground
amid the derisive shots of his comrads.-
On examination it was found that one ot
the fore legs of the horse had been bro
ken Just below the knee by (probably) a
.sDant earnan hall md ne he sto,5 ~,
there was no appearance of wound, nor
did any blood escape, though the part
was much swollen.
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

~The human heart is like feather
bed it must be roughly handled, well sha-
ken and exposed to variety of turns. to
prevent its becoming hard.
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08
AN ILLusrRAr1oN OF RUSSIAN JUSTICE

AN ILLUSTRATION OF RUSSIAN JUSTICE.
The following characteristic anecdote is
circulated in Russia by way of showing
the corruption of its public officers. A
poor man had obtained the loan of an old
horse from a wealthy friend of his, to fetch
wood from the forest. Having no ." x
ings" of any kind to attach Bucephalus
to his sleigh, he tied rope to his tai!
and thus made him drag the load. Alasl
the rope was stronger than the tail, for the
latter was torn out and left the peasant
overwhelmed with CONSERVATION. The
owner happening to come along. saw the
damage done to his horse, and at once
told the peasant to come with him before
the Judge. The road was bad, and night
set in before they had reached their des-
tination. They had, consequently, TO
stay at a road side inn, and the peasant,
as was his custom, laid down to sleep on
the top Of the stove. Dreams troubled
his sleep; he turned and fell, and happen
ing to have cradle stand near him, he
killed the child that slept in it. There
was bony muss. The father of the
child vowed to Join the other complainant
and bring a charge of murder against the
poor peasant. As day broke, they were
on their way.
'sI am sure to be found guilty." said the
poor wretch to himself, "and l may as
well die at once.'
No sooner thought than done. Pas
sing bridge. he leaped over the balus-
trade, in the hope of breaking his neck on
the hard ice below, but gentleman in a
sleigh happened to be passing beneath
the bridge at the same moment. and as
the peasant alighted on him. he died with
out uttering syllable. The son of the
deceased at once Joined the complainant
and they all walked on.
"Fate will not.have me die," said the
peasant, once more to himself, 'and as
seem to be invulnerable, must needs
try to kill the Judge if he decides against
me-
Placing huge stone in his handker-
chief, he went coolly on and soon stood
before the magistrate. Each in his turn,
the complainants make their charges, and
each time they cease speaking, the accu-
sed holds up his handkerchief in threat
ening manner to the Judge. The latter
parsonage mistaking this movement for
an attempt to enlist his sympathy by hol-
ding up to his view bag filed with sill
yer coin. gave the following We rdict:
I. The horse remains in the posse
session of the accused, until new tail
has grown out.
2. The accused has to live with the
wife of the complainant until she has
been delivered of male child by him to
make up for the deceased.
8. After the child is born. the accs-
sed is to take the place of the gentleman
T who was killed under the bridge, and
the SON of the deceased is to leap down
from the bridge upon him to cause his
death.
When the Judge afterwards sent his
servant TO collect the money of the aecu:
sed for the judicious sentence. he received
nothing but the handkerchief and 2
stone
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

L.
were more touched with an account OF
catastrophe, than on listening, q few days
since, to the relation Of The Circumstance
of Mr.. John Williams. of Coyington town
ship, Kentucky, installing his son for a
deer, and shooting him on the ilth ult
Mr.. Williams left his house in company
with Mr. Parry. for the purpose OF show
ing him the way through the woods 20
point for which Mr.. Parry had. started
and took with him a loaded gun. After
going about 4OOyards from his house, he
Thought he saw deer, aud taking close
aim, fired. His horror can be better ina-
gined than described, on hearing his lit
tie SON Isaac. fine boy about le years Of
aye. cry out, "a s'Fdtasr, lrhy did you shoot
gScg'' The father exclaimed to his CONE
panion, "ohl did ever a man shoot. his
boy before?" B 9th men ran tomect the
boy approaching them. about 90 yards
from the place where he was shot, lt
was observed that the bah had enterd the
back, near the shoulder blade. and pas.
sing through the body, passed out n little
on one side of the centre Of The BREAST
No hope was entertained that the boy
would live half an hour. Mr. Parry was
so confused and confounded. that he knew
little of what had passed and only recol-
lects that il was proposed TO- carry The
boy into the house, about 100 yards dis
tant, to which the little fellow objected,
and asked that he might lie down. With
his fathers coat for a bed, his request
was granted, when he cast an anxious
look at his frantic parent. and sailgf'F
ther, you will bury me on the farm, won't
you?" Immediately Mr.. Parry hastened
for physician, and on the way gave no.
tice to a neighbor, who hastened 70 the
spot, and carried the boy into the house
against his will. The physicion arrived,
and Believed the boy would not survive
through the night. He did ~ however,
and as late as one week after when we
last heard from him was doing we'll, the
physician and friends entertaining strong
hope that he would recover, having come
to the conclusion that the ball did not
touch a vital part The little fellow is
cheerful and patient, breaths well. has n
good appetite, and talks freely. No
doubt, many hearty prayer has been
offered up 60 Heaven for his recovery. -
Poor little fellow, may lhc be restored,
and yet be great blessing torhisd deeply
sorrowing parent. aRo no FoA ole
The lad was gathering chesnuls nthe
woods, the color of his clothes closely re-
sembled that Of deer, and the wristband
of one shirt sleeve projecting alittle be-
low the coat sleeve, the father mistoolsit
for the end of deer's tail; cwhiehli is fire.
qnently white, and fired. sa a83 Ioi
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

~In Great Britain, five hundred
millions of dollars have been invested in
railroads.
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

N The following stanzas were writ
ten by highly gifted young lady of New
York, during an absence from her home
to the Old Dominion. Are they not pret-
ty:
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

w Brigam Young. the Mormon. il is
said. has married his twenty-fourth wife.
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08
CLARKsBURG, WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER

and before morning had quite subdued
the cruel enemy, whose approach we had
viewed with such dread.
been placed, struck me more forcibly af-
ter it was past than at the time, and both
the girl and myself sank upon our knees
and lifted up our hearts in humble thanks
giving to that God who had saved us by
an act of his providence from an awful
and sudden death. When all hope from
human assistance was lost, his hand was
mercifully stretched forth, making his
strength more perfectly manifested in our
weakness
ssHe is their stay when earthly help is lost,
The light and anchor of the tempest tossed
There was one person, unknown to us,
blaze, and had even brought his canoe to
the landing. in the hope of getting us off,
This was on Irishpensioner named Dunn,
who had cleared few acres on his gov
eminent grant, and had built shanty on
the opposite shore of the lake.
The next evening brought the return
of my husband, who listened to the tale
of our escape with pale and disturbed
countenance, not little thankful to find
his wife and children still in the land OF
the living. For long time after the
burning of that fallow. it haunted me in
my dreams. would awake with a start.
imagining myself fighting with the
flames, and endeavoring to carry my lit
tie children through them to the top ot
the clearing, when invariably their gar
ments and my own took fire just as was
within reach of p ace of safety.
Roughiag it in the Bush.
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

HIf FIVE and a-half yar ds leake a
perch, how many will it take 10 make a
nike? 1 - M E-as
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

wA BRIEF L1rAHY-From all bores,
back -biters, inquisitive people, tell-tales,
and hollow hearted evil doers, deliver US.
From long -winded. prosy essays, har-
angues, and hail-storms, from igh winds
of adversely. and rich relations, deliver
u.s.
From whimsical wives, pet dogs. fash
ionable daughters, and 500 shaWls, de-
liver us.
From other peoples babies and their
mint sticks, from harrangues about smart
children and their eapers, deliver us.
From rheumatism and lumbago, quack
doctors and water-cure pills. and Pota-
tons, deliver us.
From smoky chimneys, scolding wives,
and wash days, deliver US.
From amatuer poets, and love sonnets,
dancing masters and fish hooks, deliver
us.
From politics in religion. and religion
in politics, deliver us.
Cooper's Clarksburg register. [volume] (Clarksburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1851-1861, 1852-12-08

From politics in religion. and religion
in politics, deliver US.
The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1852-05-05

SHERIFF'S SALR.-By virtue of writ Of
~ Fl. Fa. ct Lev Fa. issued from the court of
common pleas of Monroe county. Ohio, aud to me
directed, will offer for sale, at public outcry, at
the font door of the court house in the town of
Woodsfeld, in said county, OF
Tuesday. the LIST day Of June,
1852, between the hours of 10 O'Clock a m and
O'Clock p m on said day, the following described
tracts of land, situate in said county, to wit:
One hundred acres Of land in the north part Of
the north east quarter of section 80, township l.,
OF range 3.
Taken in execution and levied on as the prop
erty Of Richard Angus at the suit of the Trustees
of Section l6. Township |, Range3.
Apr 26 SO IL NJ MORROW, Sh'f
The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1852-05-05
Petition to Sell Lands.

Lawrence Shreiner, } Court of Common Pleas
Administrator of Eliza Of Monroe county, Ohio,
beth Shrener, Decd. Petition to sell lands
vs.. 2VmyO Emanuel LOntZ
mon Lontz, and the Ne unknown heirs and
unknown heirs Of Eli legal representatives, OF
zabeth Shreiner decd. Elizabeth Shreiner, de.
ceased, who are heirs and legal representatives of
Elizabeth Shreiner, deceased; you are hereby in
formed that on the first day Of May, A. D. 1852.
said Administrator filed his petition in the Court
of Common Pleas of Monroe county, Ohio, the
object aud prayer Of which petition is to obtain
an order al the next term of said court for the
sale Of the following described real estate, situate
in the county aforesaid, of which the said Eliza
beth Shreiuer, deceased, seized. to wit: Being
apart Of the south east quarter Of section No 8,
Of township No. s, of range No. 6, beginning
for the same at the south west corner of said sec.
tion; thence north one.fourth degree west, 100
perches; thence north SO and three. fourth de.
grees east sixty five perches an one tenth; thence
south one-iourlh degree east. l59 and six tenth
perches to the section line; thence with the sec.
ton line 65 and onetenth perches to the place of
beginning contsining 65 acres Of land more or
less LAWRENCE SHREINER, Admir-.
BY HOLLIsTER. OKEy g. HoLLIsrER,
his Attorneys.
The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1852-05-05

DOAD NOTlCE.-A petition will he pre-.
H sented to the Commissioners of Monroe
county. at their next June session, praying for
the location of county road commencing a, the
road leading from SummeIfed to Marietta, at the
north west corner OF Isaac Murrey's orchard;
thence to run the dearest and best route to inter.
sect the road leading from the w oodsfield road to
Stafford at or near a tobacco house on the land
of Andrew Barnett; thence with tie said road to
the Woodsield road at tobacco house; and also
to vacate so much Of the Summerfied and Mari.
eta road as lies between the Woodsfeld road and
the corner of Isaac Murrey's orchard in Franklin
township. A. PETITIONER
May 5, l652-pd.
The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1852-05-05

Ems that the Assessors have in which to
make the assessment win work moro dis
advantageously than the exemption. TO-
wards reducing the amount on the Dupli-
cate.
The great feature Of this law is that
which adds to the tax duplicate large
amounts Of bsnking and railroad capital,
and investments in stocks, bonds, &C.,
which were heretofore, suffered to escape
their fair share of taxation. The Gin
cinnati Nonpareil says:
"Many Of the hardships of the old law
have been remedied, and. an effort has
been made TO render the new law uniform
and equal throughout. Heretofore, an
individual was allowed to hold given
amount Of personal property exempt from
taxation only on condition that il consist
ed Of certain kinds Of property. fit did
not consist Of these, he was entitled TO no
exemption. The new law remedies this
inequality and injustice, as we have stated
above.
"The banker, the broker, the merchant,
and. the stock k,jobber, are each allowed by
the new law, an exemption of two hundred
dollars-but NO MORE. The same exemp.
ton, without increase or diminution, is
also extended to oil other individuals re-
gardless Of name or occupation"
II the law should work as its friends
think il will, we will be content; if not we
shall point out wherein, in our humble
judgment, it needs amendment Enough
for the present.
The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1852-05-05
MxAsTER com MissioNER's SALE -R

MX ASTER com MlSSlONEk'S . SALE = ny
IfH virtue Of D mandate 10 me directed from The
court of c. mnon pleas within and for the rou"ty
Of Monroe aid st ie Of OHIO, IN the case o. Danif
Clark administ, aIor td Samuel Bu-kirk. decreased.
vs. John Montgomery ri al VIII br thrTed fSr
SALE at pubic auy 'ioa, at the door oi the Court
Juse in said cnnhy on
1iWsd1y fhe It day 1T June.
next. betu cen thr bnuts OF 10 o clock m ard
o'clock % NJ, on said day. the following described
tact of land, situ to in said county, 20 wit:
Beginning nj the s0uth west corner oi section
six Of township three. in range four, thenre south
eighty eight aud beif degrees viii, the sec
tion line one hundred and twenty one and half
rods to post near the mill dam, thence north ten
and half degrees east Pievenrods 20 post. thence
north twenty degrees east nineteen rods tn white
ash stump thence north fniiy eight aud hall de-
grees east thirty seven and nine tenhs rods 10
post IL the bank, thence north Que aud hall de-
grers ca sixty. eight rods to post thence u. rth
fitty-nne degrees west twenty 1ne and iour iebths
rods 10 a post, thence north elghty'wo degrees
west fourteen rods to post, thence north eighty
seven degrees west twenty five rods 10 post,
thence north eighty-seven and bali degrees west
tbirytwo reds to post thence south s'xfy-six
degrees west twenty-sesen and seven ientls rods
TO n " Jter elm, thence south seventy four aud
half degrees west fortv.fve and three ientbs I"d5
to a post in Su,ish creek on the section line,
ihece south one degree west with the section line
one hundred and fifteen aud two tenths rods 10
the place Of beginning containing one hundred AID
nineteen acres aud seventy -hve perches, more or
less. Appraised at S22i7 331a.
VIM OKEY, Mas. Com.
AR 2s. 1859 S. 90 Men Com. Pleas.
The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1852-05-05

&HERlFF'S SALE-By virtue of 2 wri,s of
~ Fl. Fa. ct Lev. F'a. issued from the Court Of
Common Pleas OF Monroe county, Ohio, aud To
me directed, l will offer for sale, at public out
cry, in the town Of Clarington. in said county, on
Friday. the 2lsf day Of May, 1852.
between the hours OF 10 o Clock m, and clock
pm. OF SAID day, the following personal property:
One lot OF new barrels, supposed to be so; one
lot of hoop poles, supposed to be six thousand, and
two lots of cooper stuff, supposed TO be eight thou
sand pieces
Taken in execution and levied on as the proper
ty of A. w. BOughner ct al, at the suits oi David
Farrer and Hampton, Smith & Co..
Apr 2S 81 90 M. MORROW, Shf.
The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1852-05-05

ND DAD NOTlCE.-A petition will be pre-
Ho sented to the Commissioners Of Monroe
county. Ohio. at their next June session, praying
for the location of county road commencing at
the forks of the road, on lands of Stephen Brown,
in Malaga township, in this county. and south of
his house; thence the nearest aud best route across
Bakers Fork of Sunfish to the line between the
lands of David kirkbrde and Robert CIingsn;
thence south. with said line. to or near the SOU
west corner of said Kirkbrides farm; thence the
nearest and best route across Minors run to in-
tersect the State road running from Woodsfeld
to GAINESVILLE. between the north west corner OF
Johnston Leslie's tobacco patch Oh lands of Wm.
Rouse, and white oak tree standing few rods
south Of said corner; also that so much of the
road running from Abraham Lands to Woods
field as lies between said Lands house and the
south line OF said Kirkbrde . farm, be vacated,
April 90, 1852.
The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1852-05-05
NuAsTER COMMISSIONERS SALE BY

MHAsTER COMMISSIONERS SALE BY
lvl virtue OF a mandate to me directed from the
Court Of Common Pleas within and tor the coun.
ty of Monroe and state of Ohio. in the casa of
Merret and Lecklitei vs. John p. Ferrell ct Al I.
will be offered for sale at public auction, at tue
door OF the court house in said county, OH
Tuesday, the lsi day of June.
nex,, between the hours of 10 O'Clock m and I
O'Clock p m, on said day. the following described
tract Of land. situate in said county, to wit:
Lot No. " in the town Of Clarington, as NUN
bered on the plat of said town Appraised at
S433, 3,3315 WIN. OKEY, Mas. Cum.
Apr 26, 1852. 81 81 M,n Com. Pleas.