Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1852-03-05

The Men with Tails.
Modern science has brought to light many things
which in former times would have been regarded as
apochryphal. Geology has proved the existence at
remote period of very different order of ami
mails from those which now inhabit the earth; and
although among the fossil remains of organic life
there is nothing approaching to the present form of
man. it does not necessarily follow that humanity
had not contemperaneous existence with those ex-
tnct animals since in the revolution of countless
ages the form might have been very much modified
by circumstances, so much so indeed as to destroy
its apparent identity. We know that erudite
and philosophical Scotchman Lord Monboddo, has
gravely promulgated the theory that man, in COM
mon with other animals, orig inally gifted with
that graceful and convenient appendage-a tail, and
that it has only been by his artificial habits OF fe
sitting on cane bottomed chairs, hard benches and
so-forth together with the extravagant and unwhoe
some habit of wearing clothes that he has lost that
badge of his primitive dignity and innocence, which
has literally been away-rubbed off--stumped
and deteriorated, until now, only its rudimental por
ton be found 10 the small bonJ continuation of
the spinal column which may be noticed in the hu-
man skeleton. That Lord Monboddo right in
his theory of tails is proved by the discoveries of
cent travellers. who have found in the interior of
Africa tribe of primitive with tails, who have
preserved that inestimabe ornament which we, by
carelessness and the neglect of due precaution,
have lost These men sit on benches with holes in
them and thus avoid that attriton which has proved
fatal to the member among our more degenerate IA
ces. Indeed, there can be no doubt that these men
approach most nearly the primitive type to which
no oroH 5. hot
since we find the ghost of Hamlets father threaten.
ing to sunfold a tail ;" which must have been some
tail, to produce the effect with which Hamlet is
threatened on its exposure.
Demosthemes was almost q finished orator. and
laid great and merited stress upon action action ~
We can in conceive the effect produced
by his gestures-the authoritative nod of his head
the imprisoned, the appealing, the spirit stirring
tones of his voice, the motion of his hands, now
raised in supplication to the Gods-now extended in
exhortation entreaty to the people All this we
can conceive, but who can estimate the power he
might have exerted could he have brought to his
sistaace the impressive sweep of good stout four
foot long tail-now curling and quivering with ex-
element; anon moving in gentle undulation, speak
ing only of tranquility and peace. Just observe q
dog. What eloquence of gesture can surpass the
motions of his caudal appendage. What emotion Of
the canine soul cannot thereby find expression
We repeat it; Demosthenes almost finished
orator. If he had only possessed long switch tail
he would have been perfect.
Talking of tails reminds of the legend of the
Kilkenny cats, wherein it is related how the heroic
and belligerent animals in question
Fit and fit
Scratch'd and bit,
/ Squaid and spit,
until they didn't leave bit of their two several and
respective carcasses but piece of one ail-a dread
full warning and useful lesson, to be conued ovel
by the Herald man should he ever again feel like
calling the inhaotant of the burnt district ugly
Let him think of the Kilkenny cats and reflect upo-
the uselessness of running down each others per
sonal appearance Kilkenny mouser until nothing
will be left of beauty but tale that has beer
told. On the contrary, why not puff each other up
or if we must abuse somebody let turn Upon tn
e benedicts whose market is made-put it to frienc
Loring for instance, and all the rest of them Fo
our part, we think the Herald man is right good
looking man. After that he ought to stretch tn
truth for US little, we have made strong pull 70
: him.