davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16
ReverIe Of the man who dIdnT Wanl
10 be Rich.

Whals The use Of being nehi 10 particular
what's the use Of geuing richl Ny wife, she
says 70 me every lime get 10 work on a good
job. Jim, Why don't you Try TO lay up liille
money! says she. And then | Try to dislil 10.
10 her mind The evils OF riches. There was
poor Mr. Astor, worked hard 70 'cumUlaIe prop.
cry, hnd When he bad piled up a loI Of il he
was PesIered 10 dealh 10 take keer Of I. Theu
'here was poor rich Mr. McDonogh, in Louisi.
aua. nigh sbnUt slarVed himself, and onl, had
onesuI Of clothes, lor Ihe sake Of buying ell
the land that iined hlm. reckon I've ct and
drunk about ten times as much good stuff as Mr..
McDonogh did in bis life. With all his properly.
live kinder independent like. Nobody asks
me 10 endorse notes or go bail Tor any body
No tenth cousin comes 10 my house visilin, ex.
Pec.ing 10 live like fgh,in cocks at my expense.
No body asks me for a thousand dollars for
kossboot. No body asks me for money for
party purposes. 10 fact. get treated at other
peoples expense-every lection. And now
what's the use OF my wOrklC and scrubbin
around year in year out just TO 'cumulale few
hundred thousand dOllarsl My wife would
like TO have me TO do il. ! know, so that she
might dress in silks; but caliker is good enough
for any woman. enjoy myself just as much
as Il was rich. Your rich men 90 10 great
expense and much trouble to keep their coach .
es and great lazy fellows 10 drive 'em. but when
want to ride up to the south end, or 10 any
part Of the city, just beckons with my finger
and four horse team and coach haul up TO The
curb stone, and am Of-only a foUrpence 10
pay. No, no! you don't catch Jim Ferguson
beIn one Of the Rich men Of Massachusetts,
no howl They ainI good members ofsoeieIy,
they aint. Cause whyl They buy their liquor
by the demijnhn and drink it a, home and their
ainI no public spirit about that. That don't
help landlords and saloon keepers to pay rent
don't help along the 'chnery of society. LIS
liable 10 raiss a breeze in the family circle, as
| know by experience, for if carry home even
pint bottle Mrs. F. raises blow that almost
takes my hair off. lfIfoowed the example OF
The rich men should lead pretty life with
Mrs. F. In fact, rich men are humbug, and
money isa humbag, so guess III carry this
quarter to some grocery and invest it where
thieves can't break through and steal it. As
long as | carry il about I'm liable 10 have my
pocket picked. but when I've drunk it up no.
body can cheat me ou, Of il-lhaIs Fact
b .... .. ... Boston Museum.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

HEARING WITH THg TEETH.-Thal faculty
which we call "hearng" can be as well con.
veyed 70 The mind by means OF .he teeth as the
ear. Curious as this assertion may appear, iI
is easy to prove Iby the following simple ex.
pertinent: ,-r
Lay watch ona table, 81 lass side downwards;
then stand so far from il that you cannot in the
ordinary way hear the ticking. Now place
one end of small dead sick (say six feet long,
upon the back Of the watch, and grip the teeth
TO the other; with The fingers close each ear 10
exclude all external noise; the beat Of the watch
will then be as audible as If placed against The
ear. All other sounds can be conveyed in the
same manner, no matter how long the stick is;
for instance, if one end is placed upon the pi-
ano forte in the siuing room facing the garden,
and tho stick is thirty or forty feet long extend.
ing TO the farther end of a lawn or walki now
if the instrument is ever so lightly played, "Ihe
tune, will be Instantly distinguished by any
person applying their teeth 10 The opposite end
Of the stick.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16
Mr.. Clay and the Goat.

Almost everybody in Washington City re-.
members an old he goat which formerly inhab.
tied MAYORS stable OH Pennsylvania Avenue.
This animal was, 10 all probability, the most in.
dependent citizen Of the metropolis; he belong
ed to no party, Ihough he frequently gave pas
scngrrs striking proofs Of his adhesion to The
leveing' principle ; for whenever person
stopped anywhere in his vicirHge, Billy was
sure TO make al him. horns and ALL. The boys
took deligh, in irlatng this long bearded genIle-
man, and frequently so annoyed him that he
would make against lamp-poSls and trees to
their great amusement
One day the Luminary Of the West, Henry
Clay, was passing along the Avenue. and seeing
the boys intent on worrying Billy into fever,
expostulated with them on their cruelty. The
boys listened in silent awe to The eloquent ap.
peal Of the great statesman but il was all Che
rokee 10 Billy, who-Ihe ungrateful scamp J.
Urose majesIically on his hinder legs, and made
desperate plunge at his friend and advocate
Mr.. Clay. although he had not slain a Mexi.
can proved himself 100 much for his honored
assaant he seized hold Of both horns Of the
dilemma, and then was the tug of WARRIOR
Creek had met Greek. The struggle was long
and doubtful.
Hahr exclaimed the statesman, | have
got you fast, you rascal! III teach you better
manners but boys continued he, turning TO
the laughing urchins, what shall | do now y
'Why, trip up his feet, Mr.. Clay said they.
Mr.. Clay did as he was told, and, aher many
severe efforts, brought Billy down on his side.
Here he lnoked at the boys imPloringly. SEEM
ing to say never was in such fix before.
The cpmba,ants were nearly exhausted I;
goaly had the advantage, for he was ginning
breath all the while that the statesman was
losing il.
Boys exclaimed he. putting and blowing,
This is rather an awkward business. What am
10 do now T. ID
'Why-dont you kDowi' said liule fellow,
making preparations TO run as he SPOKE All
you've got 10 do is TO lie. go and run like blOzes i
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

OF laborer trimming irees, lately, on the
banks oc Neponset river, Dorchestir, Mass,
saw snake concealing itseIf in heap of stones
er disappear at the same point his curiosity
was aroused he commenced digging, and dug
out Of space a feet in diameter, and u feeE
in depth, ell snakes, ranging from to Is,
inches in length. and embracing ali the difier-.
en-. species common TO the viciAisy, except he
rauesnake. When found mos, Of them were
torpid, but soon gave evidence Of locomotive
power. Sometimes they were found singIy = and
sometimes IN banches Of hall dozen. The
black, green, striped and brown, and the adder,
were Gound in the most aliecIionale embrace
ERchangs.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16
Coins md Currency.

A very interesting report on The subject oil
Coins and Currency was presented 10 the Sen
ate of The United States on Monday from the
Commi,tee on Finance by Mr.. Hunter, Of Vir.
ginia. A bill accom- panied the report providing
for dimnulion Of the quantity of silver in the
half dollars and coins ofsmaller denominations
10 the amount Of 6.9t per cent. The object of
this provision is to cause the retention in the
country OF silver coins in Sufficient quantities
for The smaller transactions Of business. But
inasmuch as, in the opinion Of the Commftee,
no new relation has arisen between the market
values of gold and silver respectively TO an ex
Ieut that promises to be permanent. and il is
therefore deemed inexpedent at present to dis
turb The existing law establishing their relation
one 10 another. the bill now reported has TWO
Iimi.a,ions-frst, to make the new silver coin
age legal tender for sums under five dollars
only; and secondly, 10 limit the coinage uot ac-,
cording 10 lhe demands Of fdepositors Of bullion
bu, according 20 the direction Of The Secretary
Of The Treasury. The simple object Of this
pan Of ihe bill is to provide sufficency OF
small change and keep il in The country. & .1
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

REMEDY FOR ToorHAcHE Mr.. James Beas.
ton Of Airdrie, says, Z" Gum Copal. when dis
solved in chloroform, forms an excellent COM
pouud for siuffing The holes Of decayed teesh.-
have used il very frequently, and the benefits
which my patients have derived from i, have
been truly astonishing. The application is sim!
pie and easy. clean out the hole, aud MOST
en- Iule cotton with the SOLUTION 1 introduce
this into the decayed par, and Ia all instances
,he relief has been almost instantaneous. The
cloroform removes the pain, and The gum eepaI
resis.s the action Of the saliva, and as the aPPi
cation is so agreeable, those who may labor un'
der this dreadful malady would do well TO make
trial of H." 's' '"''o + - sa + r
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

TON CoKwrN AND THE STAGE DRIvER.-Gov.
Corwin on his way 10 Washington in the stage
some years ago, dropped bis hat ouI of the stage
window as the hat fell, he called out fot The
driver to stop, but the stage went on 10 the wa
tering place, some miles, at a rapid rate. When
the stage stopped, COrwin jumped out bare.
headed, stepped up 10 The driver, who vas a large
powerful man, laid his hand upon his shoulder,
and remarked - You refused to stop the stage
when my hat fell of, and now you have to take
a Ihrashng before yol leave here The dri-
yer turned his head. and provokingly remark
ed - That is a game that Two can play aI.'-
COrwn's reply was just what might be expected
from him. Smiling in the face Of the driver,
aud bowling with one Of bis peculiar bows, he
replied - Thank you, sir thank you sir;
thai idea had never occurred to me ! and turn
ing round, stepped into The stage, and closed The
door. The new driver took his seat and the
stage drove on.-OhiO Slate JoUrnql. +.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

SHEER AT GENERAL ScoTT.-lI seems as il the
Locofoco editors are determined TO persecu,e
Gen. Scott into prominent position as a Pres.
ideDlial candidate;-when they will assuredIy
blackguard him into the Executive chair. You
might as we'll expect ''the SOW that was wash
ed" to refrain from walIowing, in The FIRST in.
vliHg slough or gutter offered her. as to look
for fair and decent treatment. from the Loeofo.
CO press, Of an old and faithful public servant.
whether soldier or statesman, If he vas also q
Whig. Thus. the Cleveland PIaindeaIer sneers
al Gen. Scou as old Fuss and Feathers" and
offensively AYERS thai Old Chips "vaniIy" is
equaicd BY his "Iomloolery," &C., &c.
ChilticOihe Ga9ekfe.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16
A RenrIIesS Bar.


Under the Prince President the costumes of
the Fr5nch people are partially regulated
The Paris correspondent of The Missouri Re.
publican writes: H.
You will have seen that the lawyers have all
been ordered to cut off their boards aad mousta.
ches. This was terrible cause Of grief to ma.
nv of the gentlemen of the bar, particularly
some Of The younger ones. Ii was only few
days before the decree came out, that a lady
friend was laughing and telling me how happy
her son, young law student, of twenIy.Ihree,
was that his beard was beginning to grow, al-
Ter he had almost despared of having this or.
nament to his face; aud now tho poor fellow is
in despair because he has been obliged 10 cut
away The young crop he was cherishng so ten.
derlv. heard Of another young lawyer who
adored his lltIle curling mousIache, and who
could no. mako up his mind to part with it for
ever. Accordingly, The morning after The new
law had been communicated 10 the bar, tho
Young man appeared in court, his lip still
adorned with PETS The Judge (rowned, looked
at him s.ernly, and then said: ''Sir, are you
not aware Of The new law respecting beards!'
"Yes, SIR" "Why then have you not shaved
,o,. uaper lip?" 81 have shaved it sir
:,yo, ave shaved it, sir, what s that then |
sce on vou,. FACET The young man raised
his hand and enhera'ely taking off the nous.
,acbe said: 81 did net know, yer honor, lha!
false mous.aches were also forbidden and had
n mil made 10 resemble as much as possible
those Ihad lost. hope may 6c 2lso"ea 70
retain Them" The air Of sincerity VIII wn'c1
his was said left no doubts on the mlnos 9,
those who heard him, that the poor youth hao
aEy idea tha. he had made mistake. The
Judge laughed, the jury laughed, and it was
some moments before the business OF the court
could be proceeded with; but the young lawyer
was made 10 understand that hair Of every
description was from this time forward on 'ne
faces Of the members ofthe legal professions an
nhnrninaiion in the eyes Of The law. --Ia-- ~
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

HAVE SsRPENrs -TAsTEl-Some naiurAlists
have surmised lha. serpents have no sense of
taste, because the boa. constructor in the Z1oIog
caI Gardens swallowed his blanket. Chemis.
try may. however, assist US in solving the mvs-
terry, and induce US to draw quite an opposite
conclusion from the curious circumstances al
uded to. May not the mistake of the serpent
be attributed to The marvellous acuteness Of
his taste? Take this reason: All vegetable sub
stances contain starch, all animal substances
contain ammonia; now it is most probable that
the snake detected the animal quality-the am
monia-in The wool OF The blanket, and he,
therefore, naturally enough inferred that his
bed was something suitable 10 his digestive or
gaus. |. is certain that he committed an error
OF judgement, but that error may be iraceable
10 .he sub,ity Of his taste rather than 10 his
ob,useness, We throw out this suggestion as
specimen, If nothing better, Of what con.raFdc1o,
ry inrerences may be drawn from single lacs'
and as hint of how much caution is necessary
in arriving at absolute opinions, even when 1he
evidence is apparently most unmIstakappIte'
balu e6l r.ai Chambers Journal.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

Men and women Of an Eneeuaih sge, Who
have never put their heads into the yoke maui-
monial. are generally subleet 70 fePFoach from
others fer their icsocsied disposition and condi-
ton arising, doubtless from lhe enormous oPin.
ion that all who desIe double blessednsss nav
lind IL. or at least ma, double themselves "for
heHsr or worse." Nos his very easy 10 show
that "od maids" and ''old bachelors" are Hs-
GssSary evils ~ may paris OF the world, aud that
wilh The most hearty Disposition oa The pau Of
everybody TO se,de 70 The S.uIe Of MaIrinony.
iG would be impossible 10 arcOmm0dats all wilh-
out IN iniraenOn Of 'he lavs agaipst bigany,
and an inconveuiens disarangemenI Of domes-
tic concerns.
For instance 70 Lowell. Massachusetts.
there are ilUsire housaHd manageable aBd IN
married "girls," ard not half thai number OF
"boss" in the same condition. How, We ask.
in the name Of goodness can al those interest
ing females expect 70 fad mates for themselves.
individually and severslly, 10 such sraFciIy OF
mssculinnyi The thing is more impossible
Than the quadralSre OF the circle, and large
minority Of least Of those twelve lhousand swegt
creatures are inevitably doomed 10 become "old
maids" They all, however. be sOlacsd With
the reflection that il was by no fault Of iheirs'.
but ol that iaexorable fate wbich cast their lot
among such an iusudi;isul quantity Of "mals
matter"
The last census Of Iowa shows that Ihere are
Ten thousand more manageable and unmarried
men than women OF like description 10 that
STATE Who that is acquainted with this la
menlable fact can have the hean 10 upbraid any
bachelor from IOpa for lack Of mahliness.
patriotism, or respect for the eleventh com.
mandment. merely because Of his bachelorship
Cersiuy none. The search for wife in Iowa,
or for a husband 10 Lowell, must be prosecuted
under difficulties, which, if overcome, will con-
sttuIe a reliable certificate Of The courage, en-.
eTgy and perseverance, Of the person who s1r-
mounts them. That similar difficulties exist in
other States and cities we have no reason 10
doubt, bat much reason to deplore.
The distribution Of the proceeds OF the pub.
lie lands may have greatly advanced the inIeIA
lecIual and moral condiIioa Of the rising gener-
alton in several Of the States, and the statesman
who devised lhe scheme and brought il into
practical operation, may deserve we'll Of his
country, and may be remembered and honoFed
for ages to come. But how much more will
that man enhance the happiness Of this and all
succeeding geDeFalioHs-how much higher will
his name stahd on the scroll; OF fame, who shall
devise plan for The equal distribution, accord
ing to sex, Of the proceeds" Of the nursery,
among all the communities Of the world -
Here is magnificent idea for our modern ere
formers" We hope il will engage their imme.
diaIe attention, and that they will agitate the re-
form Of which we have merely given them a
hint. until sold maids and "oId bachelor
shall cease 10 be NECESSARY evils"
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

SNAKE BRA Dutchwoman thus pa,het.
cally describes the effect of "a snake bits upon
her husband:- y, u.. ..a- .-s t...
Poor Hans. he bit himself nit shnalIlerake
and vas sick in his bed for six long weeks in de
mum. Of August, and all de dime he gay water!
water! and he did not eat noting tilI he gom.
blamed Of peing Peuer, so ash he could stand
upon his elbow and eat liule lea," ....
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

ETERNITY. western clergyman, in one Of
his sermons, exclaimed TO his hearers; 'EIer'
nifty! why don't you know The meaning Of that
wordl nor neither, hardly. Ills for ever, and
five or six centuries top that. You might
place a row of figures from here to sunset, and
cypher them up, and it would not begin to tell
how many ages long eternity is. Why, my
friends. afIef millions and lrilons Of years have
rolled into eternity, i. would be a hundred
thousand years until breakfast
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

Every POntif' mat ever existed f.
Led a life that was free from all faint;
Though his acts have been shame(ully twisted
Alexander me Sirih was a saint:
You mus, hold him completely exempted.
From the charges of which we've all learnt
To poison he never attempted,
SauonnOId never was burnt
..'. III.
Persecution by Empty Prelenees- . g..
An objection 10 Rome has been made:
But 10 facl there were no Abgenses,
And no Simon D'Mondorts crusade, D..
John Huss, so continually quoted,
And Jerome of Prague, are myth,
Al The Council Of Constance devoted
To the fsggots, no moro than John Smith.
,..-.........-.... ". ..-.r..,
In Spain there was no lnQuislIion, .g .
0'Whaiever deceivers may say, a H..
CT@ould soon have mel the PoPe's Prohb'ion,)
No such thing as an Auto fe. ..
81. Barholomew's slaughter, notorious
d, A. you fancy IL, never occurred,
That twas praised 'aRdOPproved by the glorious
Thirteenth Gregory 's-smply absurd.
a.r .s. W r....
You have heard Of inuendo,
That 10 England a statute was passed,
Called De heretico comburendo,"
But lhis.ib is as great as the last. ..H
OH the Church woud have never consented
To have such a law made in her name.
And LEI her stray sheep.be tormenIed,
To death Of slow anguish by flame.
VI.
Mary nevery burnt Bishops-the arson
Is fudge, by the wicked or mad
Why such conduct. both Pope and PoPe's Pnrson
Would have surely condemned if she had |;
'Tis cram TO say Cranmer was manyr'd,
Nor did Ridley nor LaIimer fall
Whereas Guy Fawkes was hang'd, drawn and
-.sl r quartered -#
Absolutely for nothing at all.
VII.
But be,hink you, good Catholic lOymen,
Whilst historians our credence obtain,
English Proleslants cannot say Amen
To your Ponlff's preIensons to reigui
And will ever resist his intrusion,
No offence, mind, whatever to you,
Till convinced Of The utter delusion
OF believing that History true.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

PENNsYLvANA--WH STATE CONVENTION,
The Wing State Convention Of Pennsylvaia,
me. at Ilauisburgh on the 25gh, and was iargly
attended. Hon JEssUP presided. General ScorT
was declared ihe faVori.s candidate for the Pres.
idepcy, by a vote of lis to s. Pennsylvania like
Ohio, is almost unanin1ous in its preference for
Scott 1' ~ 90" '-1' ''' O'' ~"
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

G1rA pickering couple, residing near Man.
chester, England, were recently overheard in
high controversy, and repeatant Benedic' ex.
claimed: al am determined 10 have one qule,
week with lhee T.. But how will thou gelil g.
said his spouse, with that reiIeralion which some
married ladies provokingly practice. "lfl
keep thee one week alier thou art Dead" was
the lender reieinder. 9pag4 zee ..iR aa HH
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

The New York Tribune has been prohibited
by ,ha. ''murderous usurper," Louis Napoleon,
from circulating in France. Greeley takes the
matter quite coolIy. lie says: 1--WE can only
say that, by telling the truth about him and his
dongs, we have done or best TO deserve such
treatment al his hands"
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

subssribess. shO a. nss ~ il,s.a see, -
the contrary. are considered wishing % s0Atinue
their subscriptions.
their papers, the publisher may eontinuas 10 ssn6
them uHiil ID suearages ere paid. .aalIia.r.
3. n subscribers neglect or refuse to take theif
papers from the Offices 10 which they are sent, theY
are held responsible tili they have settled their
bills, and ordered their Pspsf diseoutinusd.
4 II Subscribers remove is other places vithsat
notifying tis publishsf, and The papeF e Dot sent
TO lormer directions they are held responsible.
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

GA man with red face, and looking ra,h-
er shabby, called at house in the country on
Sunday, and asked for drink Of cider. The
good lady of the house reiused, telling him that
She would not. He urged, telling her that she
had better, for some persons had entertained an.
gels unawares. Yes" said she ." know that,
but angels dom. go about drinking cider on Sun.
day." sf hsr
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

The MoTHER.-It has been truly said, |" Ths
first being that rushes to The recollection Of q
soldier or sailor, in his heaH's difficulty. is his
mother. She clngs 70 his memory and afIee-
lion 10 ,he midst of all the forgetluIDess and
hardihood induced by rowing life. The last
message hedlesyes is for her, his last whisper
brea.hes her name. The mother. as she insiiIs
The lesson Of piety and flal obedience iDtoI,he
heart Of her infant son, should always feel that
her labor is not in vain. She may drop into
the grave, but she has 1eft behind her influence
that will work for her. The bow is bsokea, but
the arrow is sned and will do iis olSee." 80
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

II INSTRUMENTATION OF nREAMs.-To dream OF a
miIls,one round your neck is q sign Of what
YOU may expect ifyou get an exravagan' wle'
To see apples, you may reasonably expect 10
find oears, To dream thar you are lame =
token that you will gel inlo O7hobble. Nv hen
a Young lady dreams Of coffin, i be.okerns
aha, she should Instantly discontinue laclng her
s,ays tigh,ly. aud alwaysgq warmly and ahlskt'
Iv shod in wet weather., II. you dream Of a
clock, /, is a4oken that you will gain credit
ina, is tick. To dream Of a FIRE is a sign that
If YOU are wise, you will sec that The lights are
ou, before you golo bed. To dream that your
nose is red at the tip is an inlmalion lllat YOU
Ind better leave of brandy and water. II
Ldvean &c walkiug ba,e,footed denotes journey
,ha, you will make.boullrss,qqs'a oa a5cs gsa
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16

To kill a miser, tell him his son is betting on
the rouleue. To bring him 10 life again, leIl him
that coffns have riE - ea
Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1852-04-16
COnundrumnl.

If LOUIS NAP (as folks decIare) i
I'd On bayonets nov is sitting, a1.
Why is he like the great MAGYAR .
''i'o Who's ever at him hi,'iugl s7.
10 Cause one is still a Hungry man,
Whatever food he gets; ,d
WhilstA'oIher eat whate'ar he can,
Must always be sharp sci. a "a