The primitive Republican., 1852-06-17
Editor Z PropzistOT.
The Knowing Man

r
A mighty knowing man was Caleb PagoS
who kept the grocery At the fork Of the road
near WOodchuck Creek, Scragg Hollow, %
the village Of HoTnvii3e. No occurrence has
ever taken place, Of all tire particulars oe
which Caleb did not possess 3 thorough
knowledge in the minutest detail. All mat
ters IN the perspective were anticipated, dis
cussed, arranged and satisfactorily disposed
OF by Caleb long before they took place. rs
neighbOr rushed into the store 70 eommU-
nieate what be believed 70 be q very recent
piece Of news, he would have The coneeit 4.
ken. outQf him BY being tod by Caleb that
he '.ilad heard II week Sgo." Events Of
the past, present, and future, were all the
same to him; his ubiquitous knowledge
grasped aad covered them ALTO him ths9
were allssstale news. -
: 4 small bet was made one evening between
81 Stevens and Joe Stebbias. 81 bet that
Joe couldn't nOn-pIus Caleb With Sny piece
Of intelligence, real or imaginary. Joe @took
all saeh bets as that" The following eve.
ming, 81 and Joe, accompanied by two or
three more Of the "bOys" of the village, who
were to ''help the thing along" and Sfll i6,'
proceeded to Caleb's store. After being
comfortably seated here aid there, on bar.
rels, boxes, etc., 81 opeaed the evenings q.
musements by asking, in q manner that in.
dicated he was continuing conversation
commenced before they entered the store--r.
$50 yOu say, Joe that they caught him
last night?"
"Yes about seventeen minutes past eight. %
"Weli, Joe, how far up the creek is it?"
"On careful consideration, should say
it was about three miles, or three miles and
quarter, or perhaps half, up the said
creek"
Caleb, who had not lost word Of the con.
versation, dropped his Eugar-scOOp with as
constituent and opened his ears, for the boys
were talking about matter in which he Wa5
not posted up." The conversation contin-
ued.
"Well," says 81, ''that couldn'thave been
far from Deacon HuntsP P
"Jest So" answered Joe, ''it was about
eighty rods from Deacon Hunts hog-pen, il
slanchwise direction"
"Did you, hear, Joe ?" asked 81, with .
face as solid as gravestones," I hearn tell
that they got nigh upon sixty bar'ls ofile." I"
The wags observed that Caleb was getting
exceedingly uneasy, and ''pilled it on"
"Well, Silas, the insect was about eighty.
two feet long, and tWenty-eight feet odd il.
ches broad, and thick in proportion"
81 thought, Joe, that there was two on
'em, but they only caught the he one." :,
At this point in the dialogue, Caleb BE-
came SO desperately excited that he could
contain himself ne longer, and snappishly de.
manded to know ''what'n thunder they were
talking abOut?"
"Why," said Joe, With well-feigued aston.
ishment, "dOn't you know about their catch.
ing that are"
THAT are Whasr peevishIy snarIsd Ca.
leb. :.
"Why that are sChGIe !" seriously an.
swered Joe Stebbins.
4 ga achale" exclaimed the beWildered
h Caleb; "have they caught . whale up the
: creek Z"
|. "They ha4n't caught anything else" said
the impeFtdfbable Joe. =
"And how much lie did they Eetp inqiE
ed Caleb, as he recovered his wits. !,
"Ninety-two bar'ls replied Joe, forgetting
the amount be had previously mentioned.
c "Well," said Caleb, With slow deliberA
i tioh, aud satisfied look, "T am glad the,
l. caught the s0hale, JoT Iheard tbey aOsrs ar
n ter him P'
h Joe paid the bet.