Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1852-10-27
A DOSE.
OR, WHAT DID sHETAKE.
pY T. HOOD.

aEllen. my DEAR said Mr.. Burrsge, you have
been out.''
sWelI, know have
"To the Kings hcad!'' 81
aNo, John, no, But no matter, John. You'll
be troubled no more with my drinking" "
ssWhy what do you meant"
81 mean what say, John," replied the wife,
looking very serious, and speaking very solemnly
and deliberately, and with d strong emphasis on
every word. You--will- be- roubled--no-
more-with-my-drink 4 have took it at
last'' s - $50
81 knew it, exclaimed the wretched husband,
desperately tossing his aloft as when all is
lost. 81 knew it.'s and leaving one coat flap in
the hands of his wife, who vainly attempted to de-
tain him. he rushed from the room, sprang down
three stairs at time, ran along the passage. and,
without his hat or stick, dashed out of the street
door, sweeping from the step two ragged little
girls, quarter loaf, "a basin of teacle, and
baby But he never stopped to see if the children
were hurt, or even to see if the infant dripped
with gore or molasses. Away he ran like rab-1
id dog, straight forward down the street, heed
less alike Of porterss load, and butchers trays.
seDo that again. growled bill-poster as he re-
covered the pole and board which had been
knocked from his shoulder.
'sMind where you're going bawled a hawker,
as he picked up his scattered wares, while a dan
fly, suddenly thrust into a KENNEL launched after
the runner of one of those verbal missives, which
are said to return, like the boomerang to those
who launched them. - ,ss
But on, ON scampered the teetotaler, needless
of all impediments: on he secured, like the Cam
lila, to the shop numbered 240. with the red blue
and green bottles in the window-the chemist the
druggist-into which he darted, and ran up to a
little man at the desk, with barely breath enough
left to gasp out. &
asMy wife poison-pum g
vegetable or rmineraIl' l'' inquired the surgeon.
apothecary, with the utmost professional cool
ness.'
aBoth, all sorts, laudanum, arsenic, exalic acid,
corrosive sublimate, and" the speaker was
about to add pine apple rum among the poisons,
when. the doctor stopped him with the astonished
exclamation.
aNoi'
But remembering the symptoms over \, ,ght, The
dream, that she had turned all sorts of colors, like
rainbow,and had swollen almost big as a
house.
"There is not moment to lose,' said the doc
tor, and accordingly clapped on his hat, and arm
ing himself with the necessary apparatus sort
of elephantic syringe, with very long trunk
he set off on trot, guided BY the teetotaler, to
unpoison the i1I-fated bachanalian, Mrs. Burrage.
Now, when the teetotaler, with the medical
man at his heels, arrived at his own house, Mrs.
Burrage was still in her bedroom, which was a
great convenience, for before she could account
for the intrusion of a strange may, even with
out knowing how it was done --she found herself
seated in tho easy chair; and as she attempted to
expostulate. she found herself choking with the
tube Of something which was neither maccaroni
nor stick liquoric.
To account for this preeipitancy, the exagera-
ted representation Of her husband must be borne
in mind; and if his wife did not exhibit all the
dolphin-hke colors that he had described; if she
was not quite SO blue, green, yellow or black as
he had painted her, the apothecary made sure she
would soon be, and consequently went to work
without delay, as delays were SO dangerous.
Mrs. Burrage, however, was not a woman to
submit quietly to disagreeable operation against
her own consent; and SO with a vigorous kick
and push at the same time, she connived to rid
herself at once Of the doctor and his instrument,
and indignantly demanded to know the meaning
of this assault upon her.
at is to ssve your life, your precious life, Ell
len, said the teetotaler hurriedly but seriously
ssIt,s to empty the stomach, ma 'am,'' said the
doctor.
aEmpty fiddle retorted Mrs: B. Who'll
would have added astick,' but the doctor, watch
ing his opportunity, had dexterously popped the
tube again into her mouth, not, however, without
a fresh scufHe with the patient.
aFor the Lords sake, Ellen continued the
husband, edo, do, pray do sit quiet"
.Pon-wob-wobble, hub-bub-buble,a said Ell
len, attempting in vain to speak with another ppe
in her mouth beside her wind pipe,
aHaye the goodness ma'am, to be composed,
implored the doctor.
II won. :, shouted Mrs. Burrage, having again
released herself from the instrument by a desper-
ate struggle. .sWhat am to be pumped out for. .
40, Ellen, Ellen, YOU know what you have
taken.''
Corrosive salts an narcotics, . put in the doc
tor.
ssArsenic and corrosive sublimity," said the tee
totaler.
@Oxalic acid and tincture Of opium" added the :
DOCTOR
aFly water and laurul water" said Mrs. Bur-
rage.
s.Vitriol, prusaic acid, and aquaefortis" contin-
ned the druggist.
I've taken no such things said the refractory
patient.
.afh Ellen vn1, know what You said,