Gallipolis journal. [volume] (Gallipolis, Ohio) 1837-1919, 1852-04-22

Igraceiui, as well as ClcVeI anu gdl
lant, sprang forward, bowing righ
and left, scraping first with one foo
then with the other in all directions
and perceiving a female domestic
Just before, who was in the act o
dishing up a pie, dashing my heaC
with such force into he,- back as tC
send the pie flying out OF the dist
on the floor, and SO with compli
ments, and dpcking and bowling
blindIy, advanced, felt as though
were in the battle, and about 10 rush
on the enemy's guns.
What civil things were said on the
part of the company | knew not; as
yet had not the courage to look up
but continued like one possessed
bowling and scraping, and enjacula.
ting "your humble servant" in all
directions, until cut short by fresh
mishap.
l had in fact reached the pie, which
still lay there, for the servant had
not sufficiently recovered from her
fright and loss OF breath, and stood
stareing at the masterpiece of cook
ing dashed 10 pieces on the floor,
without an effort TO remove il.
All at once, while engaged in
making a fresh inclination, my un.
fortunate left foot wandered into the
pastry. saw nothing, for all had
become dark before my eyes. Dis
gracefully but naturally enough, my
foot slid from under me, in an instant
personal ond political balance were
lost and down | came, measuring
my whole length, just five feet seven,
on the floor, TO the no small alarm Of
some, the irrepressible laughter Of
others, OF the large and worshiPlul
company there assembled.
In falling broke down two chairs,
which | had seized hold of in order
to save myself, together with a
young and pretty female who in all
probability was at that moment about
to seat herself, but with a speed
equal to that Of her chair, came
rolling on the floor beside me-
Gracious heavensl it was Barbara.
A terrible clamor arose, and as |
lay there | roared Justify too, seeing
in addition to myself and the two
chairs a lady stretched out on the
floor, | felt pursuaded that shock
of earthquake must have taken
place. To my great relief J soon
discovered that no earthquake had
caused this melancholy fall, but as
already narrated, only veal pastry.
We got up. The cousin treated
the whole affair as an excellent joke,
but | could have wept, nay, died,
with shame and vexation | went
TO the mantel-piece without one
word of apology, but as all were
laughing and giggling around !
laughed too, and threw from time TO
time stolen glances at the cause OF
my misfortune.
At last we took our places at the
table.
The cousin was so gallant rs TO
place me next to Barbara. | had
rather have been situated near a
volcano than at the side of the amia-
bic and pretty creature. felt most
extraordinary sensations while thus
in juxtaposition with my future bride.
or the assembled guests | ventured
only TO take rapid glance at inter
va!s.
Soup was served round. Barbara
offered ne some-but how could |
accept itl She herself was yet un-
provided. Compliments were ex-
changed, and | already foresaw that
some new evil would arise out Of
these civilities. Hence | became
more and more pressing, and looking
into the face OF my
charmer forgot the plate altogether.
The consequence was that | poured
the burning soup into Barbara's lap
and over her clothes, and endeavor-
ing hastily to withdraw it sent the
remainder into my own lap, deluging
alike my garments and my finger
napkin; it was a fraternal division.
remember all as though it was but
yesterday. 1t was crab soup.
The charming Barbara left the
table. | slammered out sundry
apologies. The guests endeavored
TO console me, and a fresh plate was
handed to me. Meanwhile my
pantaloons were streaming from an
inundation. Barbara was obliged 10
change her dress. She soon returned
and | endeavored again and again TO
excuse myself as we'll as | could.
On perceiving that she had smiled
graciously felt somewhat reassured,
and began to brush the cold perspira-
tion from my face, of course not with
my hand, but with my pocket ker-
chief.
Alas, amidst the accumulated dis
asters that had since occurred, had |
clean forgotten the ink business. In
drying off the perspirntion | rubbed