The weekly Minnesotian. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn. Territory) 1852-1858, 1852-11-20


excitement in steamboat race, as venerable
Friend of Rhode Island did, on the occasion of
o race between two cOntendng steamers, on
one occasion, in Long Island Sound. The
boats had been running with no visible advant-
age on either for great distance. and groups
of excited persons were on the deck, discussing
their several chances of triumph, and many APP
pealed to the Friend in question:
Don't you think we've gained on her in
coming the last forty miles!''
eyes" replied the Quaker, with impurtable
gravity, Il should say, from present appearan-
ces, that she had"
"Do you? Well. Mr.. Brown. how much
should you think we have gained upon her ?"
81 may be mistaken" replied our Friend
for have small gifts at correctly calculating
differences of distance but | should think in
the last fifty miles we had gained on her about
half an inch"'
He was too "close" an observer to be both
cred with any further questioning from the ex-
cited bystanders.
An ENGLISH TRAVELLER IN AMERIcA-A cit:-
zen recently returned from London, tells, with
much humor. of some cquivOque that mingled
In conversation he had with an English officer,
who, unknown to him, had served in Packen-
hams army.
"You have been, then, in America"
"For very short time, and it is long ago."
"Were you ever in New Orleans?'
"Not exactly in it-although once very near
It."
Sand did you not visit the City?'
"No they would not let ME-"
"Not let you, why how and when, could that
be!v
% 1t was in 1914, and there was large party
Of US, too, that intended to eat our Christmas
dinner in the city; but though we were very
warmly received. we could not accomplish our
wishes. So we turned around and went to Mo-
hIa D1s,, l,,& al. Al
time, we did not find travelling in Alabama very
tempting. so all concluded to return and, on
the LIST of April, 1915. we left for hOme-the day
selected for embarkatOn forming an appropriate
finish to our FOOLS errand.' Here sudden
spasm Of recollection struck the inquirer with
the force of galvanic battery.-.N: O. Della.
The day after the loss of the Atlantic, an in
dividual at Detroit whose wife was On board
and supposed to have been drowned, exhibited
very extraordinary manifestations of grief
somewhat to the surprise of his neighbors. who
never suspected him of being q fond husband
While he was thus bosterously bewailing his
loss, boy arrived in haste from the Telegraph
Office. A wag stopped the lad. "Is'nt Mr.
-. in here!'' asked the latter. "Yes." Il
have despatch for him. his wife is saved."-
"Ah, we'll. said the wag, don't tell hm--the
poor fellow feels badly enough already
lawyer somewhat disguised at seeing a
couple of Irishmen looking at six sided build
ing which he had constructed. lifted up the win
dow. put his head out, and addressed them:
"What do you stand there for like pack of
blockheads gazing at my office-do you take it
for a chuch?" "Faiy," answered one of them.
~ was thinkin' so till saw the devil poke his
head out of the windy"
A western farmer being obliged to sell a yoke
OF oxen to pay his hired man, told him he could
not keen him any LONGER
"Why!' said the man, "Ill stay and take
some OF your cows in place of money!"
But what shall do said the farmer, ':when
my cows and oxen are all gomez"
a.. "Why, you can then work for me, and get
them back"
Mrs. Darlington once invited an aged clergy
man to take tea with her. On opening the
sugar bowl. she discovered deceased mouse
on the premises. In the excitement and phren-
zy OF the moment, she seized large lump of
sugar and flung it behind the hack log. while
she carefully deposited the mouse in the old
gentlemans cup He discovered the mistake
as soon as he began to stir the sugar.
"'Tis strange" muttered young man. as he
staggered home from supper party, .'how evil
communications corrupt good manners.
have been surrounded by tumblers all the eve.
ming, and now I'm a tumbler myself
green 'un, (says the Memphis Whig,) who
had never before seen q steamboat. fell through
the hatchway down into the hold of the Winfield
Scott, and being unhurt. loudly expressed his
surprise-"Well, if the darned thing amt hol-
ler!'
-, western editor thinks that Hiram Powers.
the sculptor, is swindler, because he chiselIed
nm unfortunate Greek girl out of block OF
marble.
a true picture of despair is a pig reaching
through hole in the garden fence to get at .
cabbage that lies few inches beyond his nose
We want some money Will our friends have
the Kindness to remember us !-Teruant Paper
So do we. Will our creditors have the kind
ness to forget us ?-Boston Post
Alas! it is our sad fortune to be forgotten
where we would be remembered. and remem
bered where we would be forgotten.-Spring
field Post.
Mother" said a little fellow the other day
us there any harm in breaking egg shells!'
Certainly not, my dear, but why do you ask?'
"Canse dropped the baslsed just now and Sc.
what mess am in with the yelk!''
we learn that there is anything but dry time,
In bangor Me-, Just now. A friend who has lust
come from there tells us that man NAV cal
tor pranuy ana water as loud as he pieases
y. my vi 'ne crack houses, in that city, and ge,
An excited young gentleman, to show b;s :,
gility, jumped from the express train going a,
the rate offorty miles an hour. on the Fitcbbnro
road, a day or two ago, and the last seen Of hin
be was doing '.fip-faps' at seventeen revoln
tions minute, while the air was chock full q
dickey-strings, gaiter boots, hair and torn lin
men.
An elderly maiden lady writes to friend:-
A widower with ten children has proposed, ant
! have accepted him. This is about the number
should have been entitled to, i'll had beer
married at the proper time"