Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1852-04-09
Penalties.

that of going to law-the certainty of losing your suit
and having 10 pay for it.
The penalty of marrying is a mother-ln.law
The penalty of remaining single, is having no one
"who cares button" for you, as is abundany proved
by the state of your shirt.
The penalty of thin shoes, is cold.
The penalty of pretty cook, is an empty larder.
The penalty of stopping in Paris, is being shot
The penalty of tight boots, is corns.
The penalty of having haunch of venison sent to
YOU, is inviting dozen friends 10 come and eat it.
The penalty of popularity, is envy.
The penalty of baby, is sleepless nights.
The penalty of interfering between man and wife, is
abuse frequently accompanied with blows from both.
The penalty of godfather, is silver knife, fork
and spoon.
The penalty OF kissing baby, is half crown Give
shillings. if you are liberal,) TO the nurse.
The penalty of public dinner is bad wine
The penalty of legacy, a fortune, is the sudden
discovery of host of poor relations you dreampt
of, and number OF debts you had quite forgotten.
The penalty of lending. is-wth book UNI
brela, the certain loss OF it with your to bill,
the sure payment of it and with horse, the lamest
chance of ever seeing him back again sound.-Puneh
the Spirit Rappngs, we learn that in country village,
not fifty miles from Cincinnati, poor fellow had lost
his tavorte dog. He enquired for Towser, and the
raps came.
Man.-"Is your spirit happy''
Dog.-"Yes.''
Man." Are there any coons there -
Dog.-"Yes, but they are twice the size they are in
your country and can't catch them
This is said to have actually taken place. We have
1t on the best authority.
WONDERFUL PHENoMENoN.-An acquaintance of
ours purchased box of segars, a few weeks SINCE
warranted first quality. After smoking half dozen,
he became convinced that the filling composed of
other material than tobacco new idea seized
him; so taking small quantity of rich earth he filled
flower pot and planted one, and then patiently await
I'd foro foTu toH no half hu1c
peared, and al the end of two weeks fine head of
cabbage was grown ever appeared in Quincy mar
ket. The cabbage will be exhibition at the next
meeting of the Massachusetts State Agricultural Soci-
ey.-BoSton 1imtS.
SCHOOL, Room TIME.-There are generally but two
ages in life of perfect loneliness and freshness-tkat
of the young child and Of the young woman; and
between them the features are stretcned and pulled
about by the hand OF nature with a seeming caprice
which torbds any very positive judgement as to the
result But these the rghtful years for such mys-
ferrous mani pulatons, and while they going on,
there is always hope of change for the better
There chance of the planest face of this Pc
Rod becoming interesting than of the thoroughly form
ed beauty remaining The lanky, dingy, odd
looking girl, shall be progressing to style of beauty
which will never decline, while the finished wax doll
OF fourteen, of whom so much expected. has long
been coarse, pudding faced, withered. For the
has treasured up her inheritance for the age when she
needs ii most, and the other squandered it early
Quarterly Rerier.
A YANKEE ON VEsUv1us "A correspondent of the
Boston Transcript writing from Naples, thus describes
an amusing interview with live Yankee
Tie other dav, on reaching the top of Vesuvus, |
deserted man sitting asrde block of lava. don't
know why, but marked him at once for one of my
countrymen AS advanced towards him. ! could not
help noticing the cool manner in which he and Vesu-
wins were taking morning smoke together. His long
nine was out like bowsprit, and he took the whole
affair as calmly one would look upon kitchen fire
AT home. AS soon as came up with him, he bawled
out: Hallo, Stranger pretty considerable lot of lava
round here Any down below? Ye han't
tuckered aout, be yep On my asking him if he had
looked into the crater, he replied: 6 Yaas but
burnt the faigs of nay trowsers though, tell yew"-
He turned ont TO be man from N. England, who came
up here from Marseles TO see the Volcano
A THRUST AT GENERAL SCoTT-The last number
OF the American Wing Review, periodical of vast
influence with the party whose principles advocates.
puts two-edged sword between the ribs of General
Scott, in the following truly scientific style. It says
that soldier he has the universal confidence of
the country. His political principles sound but
we much question his qualifications and capacity for
the station TO which some of his admirers would ee-
vate him." The writer then gives him another touch
OF attery, and concludes in reference 10 his Pesiden-
tal aspirations, by remarkHg that "the exigences of
the times require ADLER hands and wider views.''
The YOU'VE WrE's RESPONSE Why art thou
sad, my love. to-day what grief is frownng DER
thy heart? Why dost thou droop and turn away, and
why do tears unbdden start. When first | wooed
thee in thine isle-thy Erin, emerald of the deep
saw thee sweetest, only smile, thought that
thou coulJst weep. The sun of summer lights the
earth. the zephyrs kiss is the cheek; and nature
calls thee back TO mrh then be not prythee, love,
weak. While thus spoke, my bosoms queen, one
l. aeep fond glance upon stealing, exclaimed, Be-
Jaoers' but you're green! It's onions sure I'm after
peeling.
GA certain celebrated medical lecturer in Pennsyl-
wanna, was showing his class the advantage of VAGINA
'ion over incubation in preventing small pox-an adj
vantage evident that the State had legisated the
SUBJECT making it an imprsoning offence for one to
lhocuate person. II wouldn't be so hard. gentle
men," said the professor. elf they put the man you
lhocuated in Jail for. in few days he arould break
our! AT this, the students themselves broke out
FRENCH TEMPERANcE.-It may appear strange that
III country where wine is almost common bever-
age, drunkenness is rare, but such appears to be the
act We can rely the statement of Thurlow " eed,
eGltor OF the Albany Evening Journal Writing from
N'ce under date of January 10th, he thus speaks OF
NE absence of drunkenness among the French people.
where wine is freely used:
crossing France in one direction, from Bouogne
10 Nee, we have travelled 800 miles pleasantly
ana quietly as you travel along the Valley of the Con.
"ectcut river. have not seen, through all the
SeS and towns, the slightest disorder i'll will
NOT have !, in all these places, during five weeks.
seen i've drunken persons. Indeed | cannot remem-
utr out one decided And yet every body drinks
Noroo IL L