The Rutland herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1850-1852, 1852-01-22
From the Flag Of Oar Union.
TRvlNC CASE.
BY MRS. L. wELLM0NT.

Jubilee times ~ consult with his .
attorney concerning the laws Of d.
vorce. 1t is thought he finds them
more s,rinsen: than he anticipated.
He was driven to this expedient at
the suggestion Of female friend who /
has n,erposed her mcddlesomc pro-
pensitics between the aforesaid Mr..
Scratch and wife. 1t appears Scratch
was married more ,hlv year ago to
a city osistccr.s ~, Ssaf. hscn the
pride of her wealthy parents upwards
of twenty summers had coquettcd
at New York, and danced the polka
at Saratoga; hal stood on Table
Rock few days before it submerged
and at the time Of her engagement
with Phineas Scratch. Esq, was m
dcrgoing the process OF Irritation with
Don Jose, now banishcd by the ioray'
20 the mines for ten years Of his soil
tary life.
Mr., Scratch can bring sufficient
witnesses to prove that he has in all
respects deported himself as kind,
loving, iorsiviLs and forgetting mar.
ricd man. His purse was always
hung outside his pocket, and its con.
tents been most freely expended.
The main difficulty seems to lay in the
discovery that Scratch made o blund-
er in marrying. lie supposed his
wife to be an angel, and she proves to
be woman.
Soon after their marriage Mrs.
Scratch prodoscd trip to Europe.
Her husband assented and after his
adorable 'sposa' had consulted with
Partisan milincrs and London dress.
makers to her hearts content, she de-
clared her willingness to return with.
ou: sight at St. Peters, or sail up-
on the Rhine thus showing her love
Of the frivolous overwhelming. the
love of the sublime.
Mr.. Scratch had no sooner taken
his American residence and issued
cards for his first levee. before Mrs.
Scratch complained of confined
quarters and proposed taking her
summer residence at some watcring
place. Since then she has become a
perfect belle. Her first coquet seem
Ell to be the favor of a young srri4
in the medical faculty, aud under re
tcnce of a singular hangnail on the
little finger of the left hand, Mr.
Scratch was obliged to pay for medl
cal advice upwards Of two hundred
dollars.
All this he has born with lamb,likc
resignation. lie has never crosse,
his wife in a single particular. Jus
before the Jubilee, however, lie di'
speak. Then he expressed desir
to open his metropolitan rcsidenc
and invite a few of his select countr,
friends. illuminate at evening. an
end the festivities in a manner suite
to the August occasion. The simpl
annunciativn Of this fact threw hi
wife off her guard. She ravcd lik
, q lioness. Did he suppose that sh
was going to soil her best DRAWN
, rooms to please the blue noses " Q
that she was going to give the use {
her best chambers to country cousin
who were boorish enough to sleep i
6 barns =
, Scratch did not urge the matter
His Monogahela whisky reposed j
1 its casks, his pale sherry lay still j
the quarter cask, his MADEIRA an
e. IIock we're cncirclcl with cobwebs
! and Scratch felt like one Of the ii
G vited guests
;. Worse than all his wife kept I'll
=, keys
If Lopez had dreaded a contest .
I as much as our friend Scratch, Il
d never would have thought Of posse
+, ing Cuba. Somebody told him a Il
!. vorcc might be obtained but thi
t was a female friend who had an ey
y TO becoming his housekeepcr.
Unquestionably enough has heC
u done but how can it be proved y B
;, sides. who wants to tell what they .
know
=. The attorney advised Scratch
return to his wife, concilirate her co
% fdence, agree upon some terms am
Is cably, and make the best Of bad jo
% Scratch paid ten dollars for the az
n vice. wiped his eyes with an Ell
:. broidcred handkerchief, aud adde
;, with dolorous sigh, but I'm a.ra
,e she'll pick ny eyes out
The last telegraphic account T
ii ports the matter all settled :
Scratch holds the reins while h!s la,
y aud Spanish gentleman sits ny
the back seat. She eats boiled Gu
tard with a silver fork, while Scrat
se uses a spoon. The Spanish gent
er man has a heavy brust under the CHI
and huge whiskers : Scratch has
ID smooth face and shayes clean. The
Iq. are only outside differences, thin
Of wei :ktier consequences we lass