Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1852-04-16
The Eaelelor,s E1are.vel, to his co,s,1,an,ons.


The Bachelors Farewell to his Companions.
FELLOW WANDERERS Il am resolved TO marry
enthusiastically confirmed in my resolution. To
all bachelors. old, young, and middle aged, thereof
say, IN the words OF Burke, when he left the oppoS
tion,-" Gentlemen, quit the camp - Icannot, how
ever, take leave of my half brother bacheors, with
out expressing my regret-for what not for leaving
now, but for not having left before this the society of
set of fellows hardly 10 be tolerated in any civilized
country but have been duped, deluded imposed up
on beyond measure of compass | would not have
malned longer in the camp with such craven heart
ed corps.-such an undiscpGnad, weak, Irregular
dull soldlery; fellows who are bankrups in purse in
wit, in reputation But what could be expected froa
a class of beings" stale, fat and Improbable" as
old bachelors genera ly are?
Felton, dndereTS, you may call my sudden meta
morphosis new or old light,-a reformation a con-
version, whim. or what you please for am resov-
ed to wed and it he not The march of mind believe
it will, 10 me, be the march of comfort.
am resolved 10 retire from The noise and confusion
from the folly and prohigacy of bacheorship 10 the
peaceful haven OF matilmony. | shall dissolve part
nershjp with the late extensive irm,'' which Join
cd unsolicited, and leave without regret The ladies
will applaud the detection. for this eTp0se will strength
their artillery against the already prescribed race of
old bachelors Mothers will read these observations
to their daughters, and daughters for themselves
Nay, every old maid in the country will. with gree
dy ear, devour up my dscourse. 1t will strengthen
Thus having secured the ladies, care not what be-
comes OF the gentlemen more especially the bachelor
part OF them 1t may be inquired, what evil Lave you
done me brother bachelors? What good have you ev-
er done me, by chance design? Have you not
taught me to smoke 10 take snuff, to drink wine all
which henceforih renounce, because am to get mar
ried Have you not entced 10 make bets, play cards.
and keep late hoH.s? all of which | shall now for
swear because have resolved to wed. Have YOU not
solicited me to join club after club, attend routs,
balls, taverns to jaunt here and there, dissipate my
time, money, and mind 10 no purpose all which res
ouely give up from this day and for this simple rea
son; because | have resolved 10 get married.
Over and above these weighty charges, have not
been literally pesed by your acquaintance for the last
thirty years? Are not the generality of old musty
bachelors parcel OF scarecrows, calling themselves
ones friends, while they the greatest enemies 10
his repose and happiness? One bachelor borrows mo-
ney OF me which he never intends TO pay another
liclts to be introduced 10 my tailor, who measures
him, and leaves measureess in regret, for have 10
pay the bill another pretends 10 be excellent Judge
in wines, and tastes away occasional bottle of my
best Then comes in horde of bachelors on Sun
day, and. as am famed for having good legs-of NUT
ton, they soon leave for me-not a leg TO stand =
Roast and boiled disappear with greater ceIerty than
the locomotive engines on the railway They are
flock of devourng locuss. Egypt never more
plagued Than have been {; but il is over the swal
lows of summer will soon disappear in winter;
one of those old bachelors shall enter my threshold
when | am married. Prince Henry never LETT his dis
soute companions with more satisfaction than leave
you; for you have Bardo phs, Pins, and many Pons
among you. Indeed, may say with that royal reni-
tent
Presume not that am the thing was;
For you all must know so shall the world perceive
That have turned away my former self;
So will those that keep company.
You tell me all nations struggling bard for lib
eriv, AMI that should retain mine; but say again
that am struggling TO lose my liberty, for have
found it to be the most calling servitude you tell me
&C the cap of liberty is the only coronet " but tell you
again, have not foundt a golden dadem' The cap
of liberty has imprisoned me TOO long.-conined me
among you in moral Base incarceratel, cramped
checked worse than Sterne's starting in the Gaze,
can't get out can't get out' But shall get out of
clutches, what the fruits OF
this liberty An aching head, sunken eye, hag-
gard, ovehangng eyebrows, feversh pulse, and pale
cheeks, some of the =" glorious advantages" of a |
bachelors liberty. Delusvc baubIe ! whole nations
have been destroyed by thy syren voice. no wonder
individuals should listen to your Gecoying bIandish-
ments am glad have screwed up my courage 70 |
the sticking point" and resolved at all hazards to get
married. I will be a Benedct let lhorns come if they |
will, "that is part of wifes dowTy,' as Shaks |
peare has it. | could then laugh at my quondam
for their longer than those OF
Bottom in the play
Take single figure from yonder group of misera,
bic old bachelors the niggard infuse his
tea. counting every leaf lest he should MAKE it too
strong for his shattered but all the sugar of
the West Indies will not sweeten the cup socially: it
wants the fair hand of to mix it, and her bright
eve to beam upon souls when drink it. Her
smile enhances every meal, her soft voice sweetens
every raugh; bu the cold, phlegmatic bachelor. the
lonely stingy. snarng, dwelling. reveling, wander
ing bachelor lives without aim. and dies unregrettel
He cannot sweeen the social meal, cherish the droop-
Jog heart or be soothed with children's innocent pratt
lie. For he is g. full of noise and fury, signifylng
nothing"
I may mention here, that since my " Defence of
Widows" in the Albion of the 25th OF October last
have been favored with several communications from
ha; class of fair readers; and take this opportunity of
their kindness One lady sent
Christmas cake; another thanked me. and said, that
one who so ardently defended the widows would he
able 10 project orphans,'-bu upon this bint
spake - third invited me TO her house, where
introduced half dozen more lively, lovely. in
eresting widows,--creatuFes whose smiles would
chase away the gloom OF care from the brow Of The
most ascetlc anch1rte and fourth sent very
nice cheese from Somerseishire. Bless their little
hearts. Yet, this defence reused the anger OF
fair correspondent Maria whose neat and pthy de-
fence of the old ssterhood did her much credit. Ii
this meets her pretty eye hope she will again trace
the fair paper with her fairer hand.
And now, hoary headed bachelors-ye hoard of jo- |
cund lrlers-ye insufferable hahi OF sef-deeeivng.
procrasnating sophiss, 'Eho must not aspire even 10