Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1852-11-03

Now you that was cut out for man, bu
so villainously spoiled in making up, III at
tend to your case.
For what end did you burst upon tho
worlds door aud rush i'm uncallcd, like {;
man chased by mad bull, what good dc
you expect to be$tow upon your fellow man
some useful invention, some heroic act, some
great discovery, or even one solitary remark
No: those who look for anything good Of
useful from You will be just as badly foolct
as the man who caught the skunk, thinking
it was Il kitten; or the woman when she
nadc greens out of gunpowder tea.
You know where the ncatest, tightcst
pants can be bought on "tick," but YOU
don't know where the next useful lecture is
TO be delivered; You know the fashionable
color of 1; vest, but you never studied the
gorgeous llucs of rainbow, unless it was 10
wish for a piece to make Il cravat of; you
know how a fool feels in full dress, but you
don't know how man feels who cats the
bread honestly earned by the sweat Of his
brow; you know how monkey looks, for
you see one every day twenty times, in your
laudlady's looking. glass, but you don't know
how Il man feels after doing good action /;
you don't go where that sight is to be seen.
Oh, you wasp.wasted, catfish moutlicd,
babboon shouldered, calliper legged, goose.
eyed, shecp.faccd, bewhiskcred dronc in the
worlds beehive what are you good for |!
Nothing but to cheat your tailor, neatly lisp
l,y note Il line from some milk and water
poets scntimcntality, eat oysters very grave.
Iy, smoke cigars azily, make silly girls act
the fool most sl,ameiuliy. say, does your
mother know you're out, poor useless toad |!
! ann afraid that you have no mother nor
; never had
You are of no more use in this world than
Il time-piccc in Il beavcr.dam, or hair
mattress ina hoypcn. You GIl no larger
space in the worlds eye than the toc.nal Of
Il musquito would in market house, or a
stnmp-tail dog in all out Of door: you are us
little thought of as the fellow who knocked
his grand.motl,cr's last tooth down her
throat, and is for your brains, ten thousand
such could be preserved in drop Of brandy
aud have as much sraronm as a tadpolc in
Lake Superior! and rs for your ideas, you
have but one, and that is stamped on your
leadcn skulls in letters an inch deep, that
tgilors and females were made to be gulled
by you, and that all may envy your appear.
ance. Poor useless tobacco worm you are
aue / taHch Tine 90, start, buy aioddy
on tick from some good naturcd landlord,
and cat lunch until you arc rs ight rs Il
drum, sneak to bed and think of nothing un.
til YOU fall asleep, TO dream Of apes, pants,
straps and tailor's bills, not to awake until
tho dinner bell calls you to eat again.
How many harmless, shallow mortals of
another order 60 skulking about Oh the sur
face of the worlds great waters without an
aim, and without motive, guided by chance,
whim or impulse, like mrllowbug in biz
eddy under shady willow, until they #rc
swallowed up by the greedy bass Of death,
and The first thing they know, they know
nothing! When | see one of these al.
ways think, poor bug, your mother don't
know you're out.
How many silly ones neglect their busi.
ness aud get after some foolish pleasure and
chase it like Il boy after Il butterfly, until they
wear ont their constitution, beating the
ground in the vain hope of catching the
phantom, aud finally iall into some hidden
pit, covered with flowers, to rise no more !
| then think, poor fool, your mother don't
know YOU are out-and you won't be out
soon again.
When sec a young man step into the
skia' Of dissipation and start down the stream
of pleasure, using tue oars Of imprudcnce,
while folly holds the helm, passing the
shores Of propricty faster than Il streak of
lightning could pass a sick crow, and is at
last drawn over the falls of total destruc
ton, and dashed into as many atoms as a
drop of water from four story roof, then
ask of myself, for can't ask Of him, did his
! mother know hc was out! When see a
hoy leaving the prison door aftcra long and
dreary confinement, with pale face and
withercd hands, his step weak and totteling,
and skukiug along, dodging all he meets
like a guilty thing, shutting his eyes from the
usual glare of daylight, cut off from the
society of his fellow beings for some trivial
offence committed in the thoughtlcssncss of
erring boyhood, when if mild treatment had
been resorted to and the crime buried in ST.
lence, and inducement held out to him to
think well of himself perhaps that boy
might have been saved from treadng the
slippery road of viIIainy. say, when see
this, think of the grey haired mother at
home, the scading tears Of misery chasing
each other of her high check bones, and hcl
bony hands shaking with ague and sorrow
for her only hope, her son, while her boiled
eyes rests on nothing; | say to myself, poor
suffering woman, you don't know he is out
yes, he is out of Jail, out of money, out O.
friends, out of credit, and out upon tho
world scoundrcl for the rest Of his days al
for the commission and punishment of {
boyisl, crime. SO the world goes, and so i
will continue to 60 until it runs down, and
begin to tlink that but few of our mother!
know we are out. We will be dismissed.
"WmAr are you writing there, my boy 2
asked a fond parent, the other day, of hi
hopeful son and heir, shaver about tel
years or over.
My composition thir"
"What is the subject!"
"TI,e higher law, thir," replied the youth
full Parkerte. "But, really, shall be uu
able to concentrate my ideas, and give then
logical relation, if am TO be constant.
iutcrrupted in this manner by irrcvalen