The Minnesotian. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn. Territory) 1851-1852, 1852-01-31


>~--~~~~~~~o-o--,----.-~-->--->
PUNcn's CRIMINAL CouRr.-Mr.
Punch sat for the purpose of trying Of
tenders, some of whom, when brought to
the bar of public opinion, OF once pleaded
guilty. The following are few Of the
delinquencies:
An unhappy youth was brought up
charged with maliciously cutting and
wounding the English language, by ask
ing, 'Of what sex is the National An
them?' and then replying, Masculine !;
because it's hymn (him.J Verdict,
Guilty. Sentence deferred.
A shabby-genteel looking person was
next charged with uttering the following
counterfeit joke:
What tree is it which is not affected
by the seasons, and brings forth neither
blossom nor fruit? The boot tree
After the jury had been absent for sew
eral hours, the foreman entered the Court,
declaring that there was no chance of
their agreeing in verdict. The Judge
told them that, under these circumstances,
they had better go home.
GALL FLESH is GRASS Bishop
Hughes, in sermon to his parshioners,
repeated the quotation that ''all flesh is
grass" The season was Lent, and few
days afterwards he encountered Terence
O'Collins, who appeared to have some
thing on his mind. 1.-The top of the
morning to your reverence" said Terence
-" did fairly understand your reverence
to say all fleshis grass on last Sunday"
"To be sure you did, replied the Bishop,
and you are heritic if you doubt it,
ooh, not the bit do doubt any thing
your reverence says" said the willy Ter
ence, 81 but if your reverence PLACES, /
wish to know whether in this Lent time
could not be after having small piece
of bate by way Of a salad !"-Marpe's
Magazine.
The TIES OF MARRIAGE.-Mr. Under
wood, the Senator who opposed the Kos
suth resolutions in the Senate, has a son
who married the sister of the Russian
Minister'S wife.
On Sunday evening last, Geo. w. Tag
gart' a worthy and whole souled ty 20,
jumped into the river at the imminent
peril OF his own life, and succeeded in
saving little girl about or 8 wears of
age who had fallen through the ice, near
the Newport side. After conducting her
to house near by, and ascertaining the
residence Of her parents in this city. he
started Tor her home for tho purpose of
informing them of her safety. After ar
irving there and imparting the informa-
ton, the only reply elected from the faith
er was, Well, was the little girl wet
much. MIR. T.. becoming Disguised with
such indifference left, leaving the parent
to seek his child at his convenience
Cincinnati .4Has.
SLEEpY.-A writer says that women
require more sleep than men, and farmers
less Than those engaged in almost any
other occupation. Editors, reporters, and
doctors need no sleep at all. LAWYERS
can sleep as much as they please. and
thus keep out of mischief. Clerpymen
can sleep twelve hours out of twentV-fou
and can put their parish to sleep once a
week.
we hear people necessarily growing
about the hard world they live in. They
have never seen better-we hope they
Will not see worse one. If the world
gives you hard knocks, buckle up and paw
down. Keep on the sunny side of crea-
ton and OF human nature, or you will see
the blankest waste ever heern tell on. %
Keep out of slough-holes and bad COM
pany, and work for an honest living, and
you will find that this world is considera-
bic Of place to be got up in six days.
Cayuga Chief
When travelling, put your watch and
wallet at night into one of your stockings,
and then place the stocking under your
head. You will not leave them behind
then, unless you have been accustomed to
go berefoot.
There are men, who by long CONSULTING
only their own inclination, have forgotten
that others have claim to the same de-
ference.
The first Boomer, Punch thinks, was
Joan of Arc, who wore short tunic, with
tights, and was otherwise clad in mail at
tire.
LOLA MoNrEs.-The seats in the
Broadway, upon the night of Lola Mon
tes' first appearance, were sold at auction
and commanded from TWENTY-FIVE cents to