Monongalia mirror. [volume] (Morgantown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1855, 1852-09-18

Wood is the thing. after al"
as the man with the wooden leg saiu
when the mad dog bit it.
why is beautiful lady's foot
| like romantic tale Of olden tlmess
Because it is an interesting legend.
Why is four quart jug likoa
lady's side.saddlc? Because it holds
a gallon.
ITO support shirt collars during
ho. weather, a genius down East has
invented set Of pullies which pass
over the cars.
You Sal, what's O'Clock, and
where's the chicken pie"
"It's eight, sir"
! ....A Western Editor says, that in
the town where his paper is published
"a rattlesnake was killed few days
apo by man with thirteen rattles."
....A Yankee down East has made
tho discovery, that a window glazed
with old hats is sure indication that
the occupants have seen rum bottle
....A barrel of liquor was seizcd
in Portland, last week, marked prime
pork 1t is supposed to DO porto"
of the striped pig"
Mrs. Par,ington asks, very in
lignantly, if the bills before Congress
are no, counterfeit, why there should
be such difficulty in passing them!
Say, Jack, can you tell US what
| is tho best thing to hold two pieces
of rope togcthcr'" IL guess hH0t'
I-Lanteru.
Ono Of the most trying scenes
in the life of All editor is being i'm
prisoned for debt, and the comPos'tors
outside calling for "Morc copy
Why is man with scolding
wife like London in the seventeenth
ceuturyl
He is afflicted with great plague.
DR.. Francis says if young people
would avoid 2alpitation Of the heart
they must give up hugging aud kiss
ing.
" Let her rip'
....A Western Editor speaks of
the circumstance of bird building
its nest upon ledge over the door OF
doctors office, as an attempt to rear
its young in the very jaws Of death.
.... The Ohio Statesman says Gen.
Pierce was soldier in the war of
1912. AS he was ,hon but cightyea
old. he must have been attached to tho
iJant.ry.
49," "Tom." said a man tho other
day, 81 think it highly dangerous TO
keep tho bills of small! banks on hand
nowadays" "Tim," s1id the other,
81 find it far more difficult than dam
gerous."
....A merchant, who died suldeH-
ly, left in his desk letter written to
one Of his correspondents. His clerk,
a sou of Erin, seeing it necessary to
send the letter, wrote ut the bottom:
"since writing the above have died"
Nothing was so much dreaded
in our school.boy days US to bc pun
ishcd by sitting between two girls
All, the fnrce Of education In after
years we learn to submit TO such things
without shedding tear.
Why is n blacksmith like conn
terioiter? Because lie makeS living
by .torgiag. Take your foo, of that.
~ Yes, and why is blacksmith
very immoral7 Because he makes
eiccs und stcels good many things.
1.-The owners of the Henry Clay
have requested the public to suspend
their opinion fur few tays. Wo
suggest that the public had lctter
wsprna Me omSrs for haD an hour
This would be very satisfactory TO all.
allow rapidly they build hous-
cs now" said Cornelius to un old ac-
quaintunrc, as lie pointed TO neat
two.s,o,y house; they commenced
that building only last week, aud they
are already putting in the Egdts."-
=" Yes replied the tiicnd, "und neat
week they will PIT in the HrCr."
80. A dentist presented bill for
tho tcmth time To Il rich shiulli,m-
|" l, strikes me, said the laiicr, ",hut
this is II lrc,iy roand bill. Eyes"