Martinsburg gazette. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1833-1855, 1852-04-28

so you set there all day and cut peices
from tie newspapers; should like that, 1t Is
so much like patch work
Yes madam, we excissorize some, though
we are obliged to weave considerable cloth
ourselves Suppose you occupy our chair,
and give the public your ideas Of editing the
paper.
Me? goodness wouldn't sit down here
where everybody is writing, alone, for the
world: writing makes person SO cross. Be-
sides, your table is all ink, it would soil my
new dress; why cont you have nice ma
hogany table and nice white curtains at the
window What makes you bang up these
dusty papers in the room? If | was obliged
to stay here, the floor should be washed and
carpet laid dowE, it must be dreadful to
live in such a manner.
%, those are our files /; we couldn't dis
pense with them very well and as for carpet,
we fear it would frighten away our custom
ers.'
Dear me, the gentlemen are so careless
about everything nice that | don't think they
are comfortable unless their rooms are Uttered
up. Did you write all these sheets to-day 7
Certainly and are not through yet 2
Why it takes me whole day to compose
and copy letter. l hope you don't scrawl
and blot SO when you write to the ladies' p
we never had the pleasure madam
No, you don't write for them or you
would not print such dry stuff as you do.
Don't put anything more about Oregon or
Congress in the paper, will you--it is SO dull
But what are those men doing in the other
room with their sleeves rolled up and ma
king motions as though they were going to
6ght somebody
Those are cur compositors setting type,
you see they have stick in one hand. and
they place the type in with the other
i don't see any stick, unless you call the
pieces Of iron; what names you have. al
ways thought stick was to walk with
well ours make the words walk. these
little boxes that we call cases. contain the
letters, and the printers put them together
into words and sentences by the aid Of that
little piece If iron you spoke of
We'll, declare! Doctors and lawyers
knew had hard cases, but never knew that
printers had before
Certainly, madam they sometimes are
foul cases and hard cases too, but what can
be expected of those who lead life of dew
lis :?
why, do they I'm sorry to hear it.
Do tell me what that man is filling that
trough with water for
He is going to wet paper, you know
% yes. l thought you sprinkled papers
and ironed them to make them look smooth !;
and | suppose this great gallows looking
machine is your mangle.,
That's the Press, madam, and this handle
here is the Archimedean lever which moves
the world. just notice its power, you per-
ceive it a broken lever
why in the world don't you hive it men,
ded The men are always so slack; but
what are these that resemble picture frames
What are you going to do with those slips
of printed paper
These are proofs, and we are obliged to
read them; won't you sit down and help
u.s.
No indeed L cant bear to read any
kind of proof. unless sometimes in trials for
promise. don't believe the ladies would
make very good printers
Those are what we term galleys
you have galleys, hey! didn't know
that printers we're SO much like Romans be-
FORE
Lock yonder--what is that boy doing?
oh, he is distributing handful of i'
Il shouldn't think handful ofpie would
be much among so many
Pardon us, madam, but we think they
would. Their slender fingers would be the
very thing for handhng small caps, nonpa-
reil, agate, pearl and minion /; they might dc
we'll even with long primer
'Pshaw. don't mention it. never could
bear the name Of long primer since ma used
20 make me learn the cateehism out of it
Oh good gracious. If / havn't spoiled my
gloves by touching some of your old type
What an awful thing it would be to get your
ink on my hands Good morning.
-----~~~><S< 
>~>~ -