Richmond daily times. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1853, 1852-04-21


The streets CT Cambridge in blue cockade.
Here follows grand and solemn peroration,
such ss may often be heard in a court of Justice,
aud read in the s.Times."
Then comes a most graphic and dramatic exam
iration of witnesses Simon Trout, dissenting
minister and sehoolmaster, is examined by Mr..
Brother'um, and cross-examned by Mr.. Bore 'um
At FIRST Mr.. Trout wiU speak according to hear
say, what Cbubb told him, and Tench; there is
no keel ing him to what he himself heard and saw,
and Bother m and Bore'um wrangle over him
accordingly. At last, in the middle of much
rambling he swears point blank to the assault
committed by Gull, and then Bother'um, feeling
him to be dangerous witness, says:
Both. Come, Sir. we won't detan you. Gull,
You're sure, smote Gudgeon on the skull.
Trous He did
Bore. Stay, Mr.. What-dy e callem
You say you saw Gull bruise and maui
him
Tropt.Yes.
Bore. And you never go to dinners
"a. To feast with publieans and sinners
What! was the bludgeon pretty thick?
Trout. L can not say saw the stick.
Bore. Stay, Sir, think that you're teacher !
ind so forth; and, in dextrous cross examina-
ton, he EFFORTS the admission that there had
been some provocaton, and that it merged into a
regular fight. Then we have the medical wit
re s, DR.. Tench, surgeon andapothecary, admira-
lily technical, translating the commonest word
inc Latin
1.-THE fauces in a sad condition.
Between the mares no PARTITION
1.-The result of the two tweaks)
s'But both so joined into conjunction,
The olfaetores declined their function;
Some teeth were broke, and some were lost
The incisores suffered most
Much mischief done to the molares-
And what very strange affair is,
Not the least symptom could see
OF denies sapienti@.''
The Doctor is dismissed, and Farmer Chubb
appears, at first stolid, stupid witnesses, from
whom it is difficult TO extort a word, and who has
mind to break away:
ssMy lord, wishes to be going,
For tits a charming time for sowing"
Lent assizes, presume!
Both Stay, Mr.. Chubb; speak out, Sir, do
Did Gull beat Gudgeon2 Is that true?
Cha66. Beat him! He beat him black and blue.
! never seed prettier fight,
So full of malice like, and spite.
Bore. fight Ho! ho! the truths come out,
A fair set-to-a boxing bout?
Both. And this you positively swear?
Chubb. Ay, sure; why Simon Trout was there.
And then it appears that the schoolmaster had
done all he could to promote the ARRAY, and had
endeavored to pursuade Chubb to act as bottle
holder to one the parties. Chubb is dismissed.
and Bore'um makes most characteristic defence
cites half-a-dozen books-upon which Bother
'um cites somewhere about score; they hurl
argument against argument, case against, and
get into prodigious fury. Boreum VOWS
elf all that I've advanced this day
Be not good law, my lord, and sound
As eer was preached on legal ground,
Soon as to chambers [ return
All my black-letter books I'll burn
ssHold, hold,' (quoth Bother'um) ss'twould
be cruel
10 turn your fixtures into fuel
Those precious tones with cobwebs spread,
Which sleep peaceful Ger your head;
Ere yet that sentence is decreed 'em,
Do read'em, Master Bore'um, read 'em!''
After which piece of malice both parties sud-
denly cool down.
Both lovingly agreed at once to draw
A special case, and save the point in law,
That SO the battle, neither lost won,
Continued ended, and again begun,
Might still survive, and other suits succeed
For future heroes of the gown to lead,
And future bards in loftier verse to plead.
Although | am copying from the sixth edition,
this pleasant poem is now so scarce, that after
long search in London, I fairly gave up all hopes
of succee ding, and only obtained the volume at
Bath, the birth place of the author, who was the
son of Christopher Anstey, the well-known wri-
ter of the Bath Guide.
The law of this book is said to be excellent
1t is recorded of know not what great lumna-
~, that the only poem he ever read in the course
of his life was ssThe Pleader's Guide" and that
he had the triumph and satisfaction of discover
ing flaw therein.