The southern press. [volume] (Washington City [i.e. Washington, D.C.]) 1850-1852, 1852-07-01
Popping the Question.

| The following is the confession" of an old
bachelor, who describes himself as being now
so dried up that he is little better than a mum
my, and expects some of these days to be blown
away into dust He advises all young men to
get married, and tells them how to manage the
'courting' The old fellow speaks like one who
knows, though be has a touch of the crab apple
in him; perhaps he got Tilted when young, not
withstanding he pretended TO have been so au
fait
Now, gentlemen, this going counting is
nothing to be afraid of if, like me, one under
stands hoy. to do it. don't mean TO boast,
but-the fact was-n my young days [ was up
to thing or two. In the first place give out
you are marrying man. 1t will smooth diff
cultes wonderfully. Brothers will invite Won
to dinner-mammas ask their daughters to sing
your favore songs your opinion will be asked
on al points, and if the family have a country
seat, you can go there every Saturday night and
stay till Monday, the summer through, without
spending a sumarchee. You've no idea, sir.
what All easy thing love making becomes under
such circumstances. a walk by moon. light
chance meeting, at early morning, in the garden;
or summer afternoon together in the alcoye.
does the business. To tell the truth, never
came so near going on a yo' age as when | spent
a week in The country wit a bridesmaid had
%2't6isae d t TO sc and one dy if II hadn't been
that the old gentleman W. e from the nap and
threw up the parlor wind just as got his
daughters hand in mine, ne question would
have popped ITSELF
"You stare, but | repeat. Il would have popped
Itself. The fact is-between ourselves, these
things become astonishingly natural after ALL
quite as " one was brought mp tothem from a
child. Don't trouble yourself about how you
look, or what you shall cay The best thing Won
can do is not TO think Of the matter at all. but
make plunge at once, and then the business il
soon over. There are thousand WAYS 10 pop
the question, ne there are a thousand WAYS 20
make love. Some do il with easy mpudence;
some choke for words and stick fast; some de
liver set speech and look for a clean spot on
The carpet TO 90 down on their knees: and come
glide into il gradually Ike a hawk narrowing
his gyrations before he stoops, the poor cirl
sitting beside him all the time, Der heart hutter
ing in her bodice like frightened bird. I've
heard Of onefw0 poor sinners who popped the
question in the street. There's only one way
more certain to insure a refusal. and that Is 10
propose by letter. woman-let her love Won
a. she will--'- always frightened when she comes
seriouslyt 90 think OF leaving her parents 10 trust
her all TO an entire stranger and n you give her
time TO think OF these matters coolly, ten to one
she'll give you denial. I'm an old man and
have seen the word. and LEI me tell YOU. the
girl who would yield in tears, on a moonlight
evening, would write a civil refusal or equiyocal
answer the next morning after breakfast. AID
then what fool lover makes Of himself on
paper. ! read some letters The other day; the
Gods forgive me for writing such.
Its mistake, sir, in these matters 70 lend
a helping band all they ask il 10 be let alone
and II there are any meddhng youngsters about,
have them put 70 bed, or drowned, Il don't
matter which, 80 they are ont Of The way. Only
give 10 lovers fair play, kick your matchmaking
aunts TO the deuce, and-my lite on 1.-THE
most demure will find way Of being under
stood, even If, like old Sir Isaac Newton, they
haye 10 make love with their feet II may come
rather odd at first, but they will sit looking into
each others eyes until by and bye, their baa5.
will some how steal into each other, and so
getting cozier and cozier, the question, when
they least expect 4 will pop ont, like cork
from champagne bottle. II will pop itself