Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1852-11-11
Tyranny Of the Petticonts.
BY FANNY FERN.

1--WE males swagger, talk of our supe-
riority, but only the savage has practical
dominion over the weaker SEX, simply
because he bangs his refractory, female in
lorIly style! We don't beat our women,
and are, therefore, slaves; we are forced
to knock under. because we hare fastidi-
Gus notions of knocking them DOWN.
This may be quite correct; only state
the fact without commentary. Unbeaten
woman is tyrant. A little blond cfea.
tire with fair eyes. fragile figure, whom
you could crush in your manly, grasp,
somehow or other you find yourself trein-
bling before her, as before a crowned po-
ten,ate. She bends you to her purpose,
TO her caprlces; " you quail not before
her anger, she rushes into hysterics!--
What is helpless, and above..all, clubless
man to do! Be meek and acquiescen,.'
O course; no other way, my dear sir,
if you want your shirts made to suit you,
your old pants resurreclionized, your
dinner kept hot, or any other little accom-
modatIon, (when you are in hurry and
can't stop TO discuss matters. "Clu5-
less man" like that, Id like to know
il they don't ai,oays resort to ARMS,
when they intend to subdue US! mere
ly ask for Information, as am an old
maid myself! Now. there is no use try.
ing to DRIVE any of the female gender,
I'm one of the sisters. and feel myself
qualified to stake the floor," Mr.. CHAIR
man) There's no use of making such
bnngling piece of work of matrimony.
Were Ia man, Id engage to manage any
wife you can bring along. Between you
and l, I'd should keep the bits and reins
on. of slightly but I'd do it.! She should
be as doci.e as kitten, and believe her.
self master of the house too! Oh pooh!
you don't understand the philosophy of
the lhing-'tisnt every man that has
call to be a husband! Do you suppose
if you feed and clolhe woman, and keep
her warm, that's the end of the chapter!
Pshaw; imagine me to be TOM Fern!
When | came home from the office,
should take a microscopic view Of my
dear FanDy's face, 10 see which way the
wind blew. Ii she looked dull, from the
thousand petty annoyances of housekeep-
ing, | should just put my arms around her
blessed little neck (never minding collars
and fixins,) and tell her didn't care "a
damaged cigar whether had favorite
pudding or not, if she only ioUed NEE
Woudn', she brighten up. hey! Doyou
suppose I'd 60 staving up and down the
room like hyena, and knock over her
work basket, and tread on the baby, and
break the bell wire, and scowl until I
looked like one of those "gutla percha''
phizes! Nosir! Then I'd kiss her. and
tell her to keep up her spirits till came
home at night, and we'd have an early
tea, and hear Tommy say his prayers,
and GO to- (well DARsEN'T say it;)
but I'd take her there!
Well, sir, the consequence would be
she would see was the same fascinating
Tom who begged her on my marrow
bones, on moonlight evenings, 'to make
me the happiest of men" and there isn't
one woman in thousand Created that
way) that wouldn'i love. till you
were as happy as fly in molasses cup!
As to meek man, defend me from Bet
,ys IN corduroys! I'D prefer to endure
the changing of refractory famale!"-
I'd rather be UNDER a tyr0,at than oyER
a Noses!- Olive Branch.