The southern press. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1850-1852, 1852-07-01
Popping the Question.

Inc following Is The "cOnfesslOn OF an Old
bachelor, who describes himself as being now
so dried up, that he is little better than a mum
my, and expects some of these days to be blown
away into dust. He advises all young men to
get married, and tells them how to manage the
'courting.' The old fellow speaks like one who
knows, though he has a touch of the crab apple
in him !; perhaps he got Tilted when young, not
withstanding he pretended to have been 50 au
fat.
"Now, gentlemen, this going counting is
nothing to be afraid Of if, like me, one under
stands how to do it. | don't mean to boast,
but--the fact was--n my young days was up
to thing or two. In the first place give ont
You are marrying man. 1t will smooth diff
cultes wonderfully. Brothers will invite you
to dinner--mammas ask their daughters to sing
your favorite songs your opinion will be asked
on all points, and if the family have country
seat you can go there every Saturday night and
stay till Monday, the summer through, without
spending sumarchee. You've no idea, sir,
what an easy thing love making becomes under
such circumstances. A walk by moon. light;
chance meeting, at early morning, in the garden;
or a summer afternoon together in the alcove
does the business. TO tell the truth, | never
came so near going on voyage as when spent
a week in the country with bridesmaid had
waited on; there was perfect paradise There
We used to sit; and one day, if it hadn't been
that the old gentleman woke from the nap and
threw up the parlor window just as got his
daughters hand in mine, the question would
have popped itself
"You stare, but repeat, it would have popped
itself. The fact is--between ourselves, these
things become astonishingy natural after all
quite as if one was brought up to them from
child. Don't trouble yourself about how you
look, or what you shall cay the best thing YOU
can do is not to think Of the matter at all, but
make plunge at once, and then the business is
soon over. There are thousand ways to pop
the question, as there are thousand ways to
make love. Some do it with easy mpudence;
some choke for words and stick fast: some de
liver set speech and look for clean spot on
the carpet to 90 down on their knees; and some
glide into it gradually like hawk narrowing
his gyrations before he stoops, the poor GIRL
sitting beside him all the time, her heart flutter
ing in her bodice like frightened bird I've
heard of one two poor sinners who popped the
question in the street. There's only one way
more certain to insure a refusal and that is to
propose by letter. a woman-let her love you
she willis always frightened when she comes
seriously to think of leaving her parents to trust
her all TO an enure stranger, and II you give her
time to think of these matters coolly, ten to one
she'll give you denial. Pm an old man and
have seen the world, and let me tell you, the
girl who would yield in tears on moonlight
evening, would write civil refusal or equivocal
answer the next morning after breakfast. And
then what a fool lover makes of himself on
paper. read some letters the other day; the
Gods forgive me for writing such.
It's mistake, sir, in these matters to lend
helping hand all they ask is to be let alone ;
and if there are any meddling youngsters about,
have them put to bed, or drowned it don't
matter which, so they are out of the way. Only
give to lovers fair play, kick your matchmaking
aunts to the deuce, and-my life on 1.-THE
most demure will find way of being under
stood, even it, like old Sir Isaac Newton, they
have'to make love with their feet. 1t may come
rather odd at first, but they will sit looking into
each others eyes until by and bye their hands
will some how steal into each other, and so
getting cozier and cozer, the question, when
they least expect it, will pop out, like cork
from champagne bottle. 1t will pop ITSELF"