Richmond daily times. [volume] (Richmond [Va.]) 1850-1853, 1852-04-21
From Miss Mitford's Recollections.

| From Miss Mltlord's RecOllectOns.1
| J. ANSTEY.
Ny acquaintance with 1.-The pleaders Guide
commenced some fve-and-forty years ago, after
the following fashion:
1t had happened to me to make one of large
Christmas party in large country mansion, the
ladies whereof were assembled one morning dole
| fully enough in an elegant drawing-room. 1t was
what spo1tsmen are pleased to call ga fine open
dsy;" which, being interpreted according to the
feminine version, means every variety of bad
weather of which our climate is capable, except
ing frost. On the morning in question: it did not
absolutely rain, it only mizzled; but the clouds
hung over our heads in a leaden canopy, threat
ening down pour; and all the signs of the earth
testified to the foregone deluge that had already
confined us to the house until our patience was
worn to thread. Heavy drops fell from the
caves, the trees in the park were dripping from
every bough, the fallen leaves under the trees
dank with moisture, the grass as wet as if it grew
in ford, the gravel walks soft and plashy, the
carriage drives no better than mud. In short, it
was the very dismalest weather that ever answer
ed to the name of 'a fine open day." and cur
sportsmen accordingly had all sailed forth to en-
joy it, some to join Sir Johns hounds, some to a
great coursing meeting at Streatley.
AS we stood at the windows bemoaning orr
imprisonment, we saw that the drizzle was fast
settling into steady rain, and that there was no
more chance of ride on horseback, or drive in
an open carriage, than Of the exhilaratlng walk
which is the proper exercise of Christmas. All
the pets about the park sympathzed in our affiic-
TONS The deer dropped off to their closet covert;
the peacock, usually so stately and dignifed as he
| traled his spotted train after him, when he came
to the terrace to tap at the window for his dole
of CAKE actually sneaked away, when summon
ed, in pure shame at his dragged tail; the swans
looked wet through. The whole party seemed
chilled and dismal, and | was secretly meditating
a retreat to my mothers dressng-room, to enjoy
in quiet certain volume of ''Causes Celebles, "
which had distracted from the library for my
own private solace, when every body was startled
by proposal of the only gentleman left at home;
o Young barrster, who had had sufficient courage
to confess his indifference to field sports, and who
now, observing the ennui that seemed to have
seized upon the party, offered to use his best eff
forts to enliven us by reading aloud-by reading
law.book. Fancy the EXPLANATIONS at medi-
cine so singularly ill-adapted to the disease
For my own part | was not so much astonlshed.
suspected that the young gentleman had got
hold of another volume Of my dearly beloved
causes Celebres,' and was about to minister to
our discomfort by reading French Trial. But
the rest of the party laughed and exclaimed, and
were already so much aroused by the proposal,
that the cure might be said to be more than halt
accomplished, before our learned teacher opened
the pages of "The Pleader's Guide"
[ wish could communicate to my extracts the
zest that his selections derived from his admira-
BILE reading, and from the humorous manner in
which he expounded the mystery of the legal
phrases, which shall do my best to avoid, not
to overtask my readers ingenuity.
1t is an old lawyer instructing young one:
ssBut chiefly thou, dear Job, my friend,
My kinsman, to my verse attend;
| By education formed to shine
Conspicuous in the pleading line
For YOU, from five years old to twenty,
Were crammed with Latin words in plenty;
Were bound apprentice to the MUSES.,
And forced with hard words, blows, and bruises
To labor on poetic ground,
| Dactyls and spondees to confound;
And when become in ictions wise,
In Pagan histories and lies,
Were sent to dive at Granta's cells,
For truth in dialectic wells
There duly ound for four years more,
To ply the philosophic oar,
| Points metaphysical to moot,
Chop logic, wrangle, and dspute;
And now, by far the most ambitous1
Ofall the sons of BeIgersdicius;
| Present the law with all the knowledge
You gathered both at school and college,
Still bent on adding to your store
The graces of Pleader's lore,
And, better to improve your taste,
| Are by your parents fondness placed
Among the blest, the chosen few,
| (Blest, if their happiness they knew
Who, for three hundred guineas paid
To some great master of the trade,
Have, at his rooms, by special favor,
His leave to their best endeavor,
By drawing pleas from nine till four,
To earn him twice three hundred more;
And after dinner may repair
To foresaid rooms, and then and there
Have 'foresaid leave from five till ten,
To draw the aforesaid pleas again.
Then he favors his pupils with bit of his own
history, which seems to me capital
'sWhoe'er has drawn special plea,
Has heard of old Tom Tewksbury;
Deaf as post and thick mustard,
He aimed at wit, and bawled and clustered,
And died Ni5 priuS leader
That genius my special pleader.
That great mans office | attended,
By Hawk and Buzzard recommended;
Attorneys both of wondrous skill
To pluck the goose and drive the quill.
Three years l sat his smoky room in,
Pens, paper, pounce and ink consuming;
The fourth, when Essoign day begun,
joyful | hailed the suspicious sun,
Babe Tewksbury and clerk adieu;
"Purifcaton Eighty-two.
OF both | washed my hands; and though
With nothing for my cash to show
But precedents, serawled and blurred
Iscaree could read one single word,
Nor in my book of commonplace,
One feature of the law could trace,
Save Bu2zard's nose and visage thin
The Publication of the Virgin Mary is one of
the return days of Hilay Term.