Southern sentinel. [volume] (Plaquemine, Parish of Iberville [La.]) 1848-1858, 1851-11-15
Rakings of Fun.

RaklngS OF Fun.
WESTERN ETIQuETTE.-The Chicago (Ill)
Democrat says that the Yankee Traveller who
saw the live Hoosier has again written to his
mother, telling her his experience as follows:
Western people are death on etiquette. You
can't tell a man here that he lies, without fight
ing. A few dnys ago man was telling two
of his neighbors, in my hearing, pretty large
story.
"Stranger," says ], "that's whopper."
clay there, straRget," says he.
And in the twinkIing of an eye found N.Y.
self in the ditch, perfect quadruped.
Upon another occasion, says to a man l
never saw before, as a woman passed.
"That isn't specimen of your western wo-
men, is it? :"
"You are afraid of fever and ague, stranger,
amt you!" says he.
"Very much" says /.
"Well," replied he, "that lady is my wife,
and if you don't apologize in two minutes, by
the honor of a gentleman, swear that these
two pistols" which he held cooked in his hands,
"shall cure you of that disorder, entirely. So
don't fear, stranger"
So knelt down and politely apologzed.
l admire this western country much, but darn
me if can stand SO much etiquette; it always
takes me unawares.
An Englishman wishing to discover the re-
ligion Of an Irish guide, and not wishing to
put the question Of faith plump to him, in
quired-Paddy, what's your belef!" To
which Pat required-"Wisha, then upon my
sowl, yer honor, but am of my landlady's be-
lief" "What's that Paddy?' ''Och, and I'll
tell you; but owe her five half years rint, and
she believes that III never pay her, and upon
my sowl that's my believe too.'
A drunken man fell asleep by the roadside,
where pig found him and began to lick his
mouth "Who's kissing me now!" exclaimed
the drunkard what capital thing 1t is to be
in favor with the women!"
"Oh! my dear, how came you so wet" in
quired an affectionate mother of her son.
aWhy, ma, one Of the boys said darseat jump
into the creek, and by ginger, l tell you, l
amt to be dared"
A dandy with cigar in his mouth, entered
menagerie, when the proprietor requested
him to take the weed from his mouth, lest he
should teach the monkeys bad habits.
A Yankee pedlar with his cart, overtaking
another of his clan on the road was addressed
"Hallow, what do you carry!"
"Drugs and medicines" was the reply.
"Good," exclaimed the other, "you can 60
ahead; carry grave-stones.'
Aperson pointed outa man who had profu-
sion of rings on his finger, to cooper "Ah,
said the artisan, ut is sure sign of ,ceokness,
when so many hoops are used"
A Sufficient Ercuse.-A gentleman having
been lately called on to subscribe to a course
of lectures, declined, "because," said he, "my
wife gives me lecture every night for moth
ing"
Philosophers say that shutting the eyes
makes the sense Of hearing more acute. A
wag suggests that this accounts for the many
closed eyes which are seen in our churches
every Sunday.
There is sportsman in Michigan so lazy
| that he put one of his eyes out, the other day,
to save the trouble of winking when he takes
aim.
An Obtuse Boy.-"I say boy, stop that OK. ,
u haven't got no stopper, sir" swell, head
him, then" "He's already headed sir" Con-
found your impertinence! turn him then.'
sHe's right side out already, sir" "Speak te
him you rascal, you.' "Good morning Mr.
OK"
| A fellow who had been sentenced to siz
months imprisonment in ricketty old country
jail, for some irregularity made his escape. Or
being retaken he was asked why he broke jai
his reply was, 81 didn't break out, ! fell ou1
the id thing"
A fantastical preacher, quarrelled with {
friend on Christmas Ere. "IfI were Abel
said the parson, 81 would Cain YOU" So
don't care Adam for your religion-it is mere
job :"
The last story Of Barnum is, that he ha'
picked up in his travels a small pot of tar, sup
posed to have been left where the .]sraelite'
pitched their tents.
$50 here am, between two tailors," sale
beau at public table, where q couple O
young tailors were seated, who had just begun
business for themselves
"True," was the reply "we are new begin
ners, and can only afford one goose betweer
u.s."
There is class of people who ask you why
you don't come to their house, but never 50!
do.