Washington telegraph., 1851-06-25

Same lean, bald cli1--a lonely patcn OF ground,
I'm amidst the waters--some poor isle
suhsre summerblooms were never known 10 smile,
~. -. ,rs.s 10 weld their verdure ye. around
TIT barren spot the dimpIiag surges tbrong,
S.%asr;ug il with their low and paintive song,
.nd .clnspng the deserted cast away
. most strict embrace-and all along
r. T., naruu rendering freely its array
~ ~ ,rsas sured she'll ard coral. Thus we may
~. love in faithful woman: Oft among
ans rudest shocks of life's wide she shares
M.n,s lot and more than half the burden bears,
arousd whose path are flowers strewn by her ten--
der care
NEWSPAPER COLLECTING.
Written for South Carolina paper,
h,t suited to most meridians.
envy dear SRI have just returned
from tour through tins State, and pro-
ceed to furnish you with all accoun; of
NV abors and their success. Ihave been
zone for three months, and assure you,
in all sincerity; that l am fully satisfied
Won furnished me a list of one hundred
and seventeen owing subscribers, as you
will recollect / have called upon one
hundred and four of them, and have the
honor of paying over to your order three
dollars and twelve and half cents, being
the amount to which you are entitled
return you the list numbered l to 1T,
and now give reply TO each.
No. lis a munster. He saws, in the
first place, he never got one half of the
numbers, IA lie according to the account
of the Postmaster) and in the next place
your loker's column was too scurrilious.
lie caut think of aiding to sustain a
paper that advertises horse races aud
gander pulings. Besides he knows from
the tone of your editorials that you drink.
and paying you would only be the means
of your ending yoar days in the kennel.
He wonders at your impudence IN sending
him his bill after publishing the account
of the great prize fight between Left
Handed Smoke and Battering Bill. He
wants nothing more to do with you
never wants 10 hear from you again.
No 2-Is in Jail for debt. He has not
seen a half a dollar for year. Saws
he would pay with the utmost cheerful
ness, If he only had the money. but he
had TO borrow shirt to put on last Sun
day. Admires your paper wonderfully.
aud hopes you will continue sending il to
him. He wishes you TO take bold stand
in favor of the abolition of imprisonment
for debt. as he thinks it would ne very
popular move with gentlemen in his situa-
ton. If you send him any more papers
he hopes you will see that the postage
is paid, as otherwise he will be unable
TO enjoy your lucubrations.
No SIS young doctor. Says your
paper is beneath the notice Of gentle
man. Wouldn't give a - for a cart
load OF them. Says you inserted an article
rejecting on the profession. Onlv wishes
he could catch You here-would make
you smell -. Is going to persuade
everybody that takes your paper to stop
it. Curs'J your bill, and says you may
collect it the hest way you can.
No. As an old maid. Says you are
always taking aiug at single ladies of
an uncertain age Wouldn't pay you if
she was rolling in wealth, and you hadn't
as much casn as would buy you crust
of bread. Sent all the papers she had
back month ago. and says. that now
she sent them back, she don't owe you
anything. Says she is even with you,
aud intends TO keep SO until the day of
Judgment. Asked me not to forget TO
tel you that you are no gentleman, or
YOU wouldn't undertake to slander large
aud respectable caS of the female popu-
lation of the country,
No. 5-Is a gambler-a sporting gen..
ho <,I. u
out last week at the races. Couldn't ac-
comodate his grandmother with half
dime if she was starving Likes your
paper tolerably- would like it better if
you would publish more races and would
give an account of cock
fight. Likes the description of the prize
fight amazingly-iI redeemed a multitude
OF your faults Hopes you won't think
hard of him for not paying you now-but
has got prospect of soon having some
loose change, as he is after rich young
greenhorn who arrived here last week
Will pay your bill ont of the piuckings.
No. 6-ls an old jrnnkard. Hasn't
got anything aud never expects TO have.
Gathered up all the papers that he had
and sold them for half piut of rum to
the doggery keeper to wrap groceries it.
Wished you would send him a pile, as
they cost him no postage, his brother-in-
law being postmaster and permitting hi....
TO take Out his papers Tor nolhlng.-
Winkssui at me when | presented your
pill. and inquired if wasn't distant re-
iatou of the man that buted she ball off
the bridge.
No. Us magistrate. Swore he
never owed you cent, and told me l
was low rascal fos trying to swindle
him in such barefaced manner. Ad-
vsed me TO make tracks In little less
than no time. or he would get warrant
against me as common cheat, and have