The Minnesota pioneer. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn. Territory) 1849-1855, 1851-08-28
Odds and Ends.

"Cap,ain,' said rugged country urchn to
city dandy with u immense shirt collar, Can
tain, are you going 10 haul manure to day.
mo, You ragged rascal what makes you ask THAI
question: ''Why, kase you've got such a
lhunderin' big pau Of sidebearis up
MA" said an intelligent ,houghfui litiIe girl
of nine, 81 don't think Solomon was so rich us
they say he was" "N!y, my dear, what put
that into your head 90 asked the nstoui,hed
mother. ''Because The Bible says he slept with
his fathers, and think if he bad been very rich
he would have had ri'e 10 steep ptih.''
FoLLY.--To expect Il romantic Young girl to
love man whom every body speak, we'll Of
Get up a persecution, and her affections will
cling SO fast that dozen guardians can't bulge
them.
When your friends are laid up with the rheu-
niatism always press them to come and take
tea with you. While such acts of Kindness en-
tail no expense on your pociet-book, they pro
cure for you large reputation for sympaIh, and
worldly kindness. With proper Discrimination,
there is nothing that pays better than goodness
Of heart"
GIRLS AND MARE.-Two Young ladies' of
indianapolis, who belong 10 the bon-ton, were
cut riding in buggy 10y themselves, and after
driving through the various fashionable avenues,
they concluded TO try the plank road Well, to
The plank road they went, and while troitin.
hriskly along they were suddenly arrested by !,
toll-gate keeper, who demanded his toll. ''I,Cw
much Is III" asked the grls. ''For Il man and "a
horse" he replied. ''rt is fifty cenls.'' swell,
then. get out OF :he way, for dre girls and IA
mare! Get up Jenny and away they went,
leaving the man in mute establishment
We are told there is man in town who does
nothing all the tune and piles it up the next day
lie has . clerk TO keep rally.
ALuDIcRoUs MIsrAKE.-A gentleman ac-
customed TO the signature Of the firm in Which he
was partner, having Ia sign haplisnial register
of one Of hrs children, entered 1t as the svn Of
''Smiih, Jones & Coz
One "garden patch'' Of ours has been profa-
bic, very---ihis season. The bugs ate up the Gu
cumhers, the chickens ate uP the bugs the neigh
bors' cats ate up the chickens-and we are now
in search Of something that will eat the CATS Can
any Of agricultural friends aid us FL Anleri-
can Union.
Mrs. Darlington is of opinion that Mount Vesu-
vius should take Townsend parilla, to cure
itself Of eruptiOnsi The old lady thinks il ha $
been vomiting SO long nothing else would stay on
its stomach
The editor of the Burlington, Va Sentinel
the humorous SAKE, thus replies TO grunbins
subscriber:
"a free soil patron of the Sentinel
Politely bids Us send the Thing TO hell -
A timely hint. lis proper, we confess,
With change Of residence tic change tn a,ldre IS
1t shall be sent if Char0n's mail will let it, Il
Where the subscriber will be sure to get il 80
We heard, yesterday, of a man living on Little
Hooking, Oho. whose wife gave birth to two
children, his mare to two colts, and his COW ia
three calves all in one week! At las, dates. "A,
were alive and kicking Now, that's villa, ri.h,
be termed tolerably prolific family.
man down east thus POLITICALLY adyertscs his
truant wife: son the 9th of July on the nj. ht q
Monday, e!aped from her husband, The viii. o,
John Grundy. His grief for her absence each
day growing deeper, should any man find her he
begs him to-keep her"
A gentleman meeting one Of his friends who
was insovent, expressed great concern for his
embarrassment. "You are Mistaken my den,
SIR was the reply, go not it is my creditor,
who are embarrassed
The N. Y. Evening Post tell a good story Of +,
minister who got quite nc. on IA warm SUNDAY
He entered the pulpit and addressed the audience
as follows, as he wiped the Precipitation from, hi.
face:
.srhis Is damned hot morning.
The congregation stared and wonIe, ed-b.,
finally their good pastor went on, after C,rp;,o
himself with the hymn book, and concluded 10
fellows:
.'Such. my brethren, the startling lansuage
which met my ears as entered the holy temple
this morning. from one who, suppose has come
10 take part IN the solemn exercises appropriated
TO this place and this holy day." &C.