American telegraph. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1851-1851, 1851-07-28
The Epistles or Peter Partinxto tr.
No. 4.
Communicated to the Am. Telegraph by JOINS, esd
OWL Hollow, VA, July rs. 1851.


OWL Hollow, Va, July rs, 1851.
MY DEAR SAM: Circumstances does heap
in these queer times to bring folks into public
notice, and notice gnerally that when they is
fetched in they does great many things to
keep 'emselves always before the people, which
however amt always in good taste. Howsoever,
win venture to have my name in print, even
If have to take it thar myself, in order that
the good folks of all the world and the rest of
mankind may know who is, and what is, and
how far to be 'blieyed is. My sanity old
mother, who is smarter than old Solomon his
self, and whose sayings is better knowed by
everybody that am part Of the Proverbs, said
to me 'tother night, "Peter, why amt you
writing for the papers, and raising yourself to
be clerk in one Of Uncle Sans government
shops, like other people of sense ?" Well, says
l, lor me, mother, that are the smartest hint
you ever give me in your life, and as Tiker Bray
said, "Score me down-Pm jest thar" So,
Sam, you see, as Unkle Tony Weller used to
say, "the consequence Of that manuver'' in
mother are this production, las No. ~ which,
if you has any regard for my fortune in arter
days, you will have shining in print very sud-
IDENTIFY. Well then, by way of wedging in some
thing as commencement, let me say that news
is as skase here as hen-eggs in Stafford, and all
that we does git is ginerally concerning your
folks in Washington. l reckon, then, l might
afford to send leetle Of that back, in order
that it may be divided 'mongst them people in
your city who didn't get any of it before it was
sOnt away
'Blieve me when I tell you, that it was hearn
here yesterday that great changes is about to
take place in Washington very soon, and that
the United States is going to do without any
Capitol arter the first Of next Jenuary. In
order to fix matters accordin', tits said all the
furniture in the White-house is to be sold, and
Mr.. Fillmore and his family is going to travel;
Mr.. Webster is going to spend his summers In
Massachusetts, and his winters with Queen Vic
in. England DR.. Corwin is going to Mexico to
buy claims against this Government, and to visit
DIR. Gardner, if he is there, to learn how to pro-
coed in the biziness; Mr.. Graham is going
North to superintend the building of the STEINER
Coon" which is going to run on Salt river in
1852; Mr.. Conrad is going to stay here to keep
Col. Talcott from having any more shells and
shots made, even for home consumption Mr..
Stuart is going to spend part of his time here,
attending to his dependents" and tother part
in Richmond to make speeches, and cabbage q
little more thunder from John Minor Bolts !;
Mr.. Crittenden is going to stay in Kentucky to
keep the Locos down, and Mr. Hall is going to
Buffalo to learn speech-making. Well, raley this
will be working them public servants too hard,
accordin' to the pay they git from the United
States-it is jest outrageous, and we the people
ought to take the matter in our hands and keep
the poor fellows from doing that kind of work.
Mother says she 'magins that we will do it in
go, and l spect we will
1t greaved us all very much here to hear that
a man named Mr. Commentator is telling tales
out of school bout Mr.. Stuart and Mr.. Hall,
both of who is too CRATE to have every bad
thing insinuated bout 'em. Now eff Mr.. Stuart
didn't tell raal straight tale in Richmond, its
nothing to nobody, for he's A SECITERRY in
Washington, and big man in Virginny, where
in 1850 he got at least half as many votes for
seat in the Virginia Convention to make new
Constitution as the little men did who run gainst
him, which showed the big Seciterry that he
had more of that thar thing he calls "merrit"
than his nabers could preciate.
Well as / is alluded to Judge Hall, l cant
help telling you my feelins when l hearn that
the CRATE Postmaster General has been going in
his shirt sleeves ever since the "Auggerration
Ball." as you. folks calls it, on account of Mr..
Farnham's losing his coat for him that night,
and then not axing pardon and buying him
another one All, Mr.. Farnham, you is bad
man. | find that must fetch my embarrassing
pistle to an eend. You must rite soon and give
us the newes bout things in general. l will
rite agin soon. Yours tell deth,
PETER HARRINGTON, JR.
To SAML. JONES, esq, Washington.