The Minnesotian. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn. Territory) 1851-1852, 1851-10-15
Determined to Marry.

| Determined to Marry.
The following is the conclusion of the
confession of lady, who was drcadrully
afraid of becoming an old maid, and who
was determined to marry at al! hazards
She had been maneuvering for husband
until her thirty-sixth year, ready and will
ling-anXious, even-to marry any body
or any body who would "pop the ques-
tion,' and arriving sometimes at the very
borders of the state of matrimony, when
she says:
! "My sisters, be it remembered, were
older than l. They, too, were single
But they had lived more domestic lives
than |, had read fewer works of fiction.
had been cultivating their own natures,
and seeking to make every body around
them happy. And every body revcrenced
them, and loved to look upon their open,
pleasant countenance-1 mean every body
worth pleasing ng-and they were very hap
ipy.
At last our good parents died, and left
each Of us little Independence. Within
a year | was married.
Twas married for my money. That was
ten years ago, and they have been ten
years Of purgatory.
l have had bad luck as wife, for my
husband and have scarcely one taste in
common. He wishes to live in the coun-
try, which hate. l like the thermometer
at seventy-tive degrees, which he hates.
He likes to have the children brought up
at home instead Of at school, which hate
| like music and want to go to concerts,
which he hates. He likes roast pork,
which ! hate and l like minced veal,
which he hates. There is but one thing
which we both like, and that is what we
can't both have, though we are always
trying for 1.-THE last word.
have had bad luck as mother; two
such huge, selfish, passionate, unmanage-
able boys never tormented feeble woman
since boys began. l wish had called
them both Cain. At this moment they
have just qiarreled over their marbles
Mortimer has torn off Orville's collar, and
Orvile has applied his colt like heels to
Mortimcr's ribs; while the baby Zcnobia.
in my lap, who never sleeps more than
half an hour at time, and cries all the
time she is awake, has been reused by
their din to scream in chorus.
have had bad luck as housckeepcr,
for I never kept houscmaid more than
three weeks. And as to cooks, look back
bewildercd on the long phantasmagoria of
faces fitting stormily through my kitchen,
as a mariner remembers rapid succession
Of thunder gusts and hurricanes in the
Gulf of Mexico. My new housewife
bounced ont Of the room yesterday, flirt-
ing her dustcr, and muttcring, real old
maid after all! y Just because showed her
table on which could write SLUT with
my finger in the dust
never see my plump, happy sisters,
and then glance in the mirror at my own
cadaverous, long, doleful visagc, without
wishing myself an old maid. do it eve
ry day of my life.
Yet half of my sex marry as did; not
for love, but for fear fear of dying old
maids.
They have their reward. And those
whose idle tongues create this mischiev-
GUS fear, and thus make SO much domestic
misery, nave lnclr responsibility.
DOMESTIC NIoBEs.-"I cannot endure
tears. Some think they are lovely in
women, and compare her to flower dew
bcsprent; but confess, never could see
the charm. Give me smiles-wreathed
smiles; the only tear l like to see in a
woman's eye is the single pearl of charity
that hangs on the fringed lid at the sight
of misery. That would kiss away but
the fearful fount Of passion may be closed
for me forever. A woman cries for grief,
spite, or anger. l confess that to me a
dry pocket-handkerchief is preferable to
wet one. Anger and spite annoy me,
and grief irritatcs me, even when | would
console. Give me the woman who smiles
when one is sad-a human sunbeam glan-
cling into and irradiating the darker
corners of the breast. As for even
tears of joy, not to speak of the vagaries
of Mysteries, they are my abomination. In
fact, woman does not melt me with
tears, although she may fascinate with her
smiles. hate crying woman."