davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
437.
IThe seienee Of Dunning.

Il say, Jacques, this dunning is easily re-
duced TO a science and art. A Soot.maker
desired me to collect a bill of twenty dollars
against Clergyman, the Rev. Mr.. Truesdel;
you know him Jacquess A man of talent
great talent, virtue-pariicular friend of
mine. Went 10 see him-couldnt pay
Called the next day on his pretty wiie-6-
nest eye in New York--got OH the lender
eide OF her; she promised 10 make her hus-
band pay--called the next day; would not
see me. Went 10 church eaily-like going
to church. Truesdell was to preach ; got
seat in The FIRST pew, right straight in trout OF
The pulpit. Sat quiet through prayers, ill
Iruesaell got up in the. pulpit to preach, then
didntl lean forward and rest my elbows OH
Tire front OF the pew, and hold my chih with
both hands, and didn't ! fix my eyes upon
him-never stirred Them once-Iooked
right straight into the very middle of his
forehead, like tine Masnetzers do. No
preaching that day. No preaching at all;
tired TO do it, but kept my eye on him, and
ne did not know what he was driving at
Everybody said II was the shortest sermon
they ever heard. People went away--I
went and thanked him for such a good ser.
mon. Didn't he turn red and pale he an
sweTed as quiet as lamb !; then asked in
wh'speb what time he would see me 10.
morrow-'o o'clock says he, and away
went. Called this morning, JUST as the clock
was striking nine; came 10 The door him.
SELL looked doleful, as though he was going
to the burial service. Iput the bill into his
hand, he put the money into mine, put the
other on my shoulder, God bless you, nv
son. said he,-'Amenp !. cried !. Great
county, this, fine preachcrs-fne preachers.n
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
Fashions of the Day,

Our scissors have provided us with two
notes upon the fashions of the day; one on
church going the other on party making.
The church of course must take the prece-
dence:
"Well, Laura, give me short sketch Of
the sermon. Where was the text w -
.tOlA i don't know. Il NJ have forgotten
but weald you believe it, MRS. v. wore that
bonnet of hers. couldn't keep my eyes
off it all the meeting time; and Miss T;
wore a new shawl that must have cost fifty
dollars. Iwonder her folks do not see the
folly of such extravaganza, and there was
Miss S. with her pelisse--i,'s astonishing
what want of taste some folks exhibit"
"Well, if you've forgotten the sermon,
you have no. the audience; but which
preacher did you prefer-this one, or Mr..
APP
ooh, Mr.. A. he is so handsome and SO
graceful what an eye. and what fine set
of teeth he has.o
And for fashionable party, we believe
the following recipe will be found all-suffi.
cient:-
'Take all the ladies and gentlemen you
can get, place them ina room with slow
fire, stir them well, have ready a piano
forte, harp, handful of books or prints,
put them in from time to time, when the
mixture begins 10 settle, sweeten it with po-
liteness or wit, if You have it--if not, fiat
terry will do as well; ard is very cheap.
When all have stewed together for two or
three hours, put in one or two turkeys,
some tongues, sliced beef or ham, taits,
cakes, and sweetmeats, and some bottles of
wine-the more you put in the better, anG
the more substantial your rout will be.
"N. B. Fill your room quite full, and lei
the scum run off ITSELF
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
widows Tactics in Astoria.

In Astcna we saw one day, when there
was quite crowd at the encampment sew
erai squaws, all dressed in their best attire.
These were all more than usually attentive
10 their personal appearance. The princi-
pal among them was widow, whose lime
of mourning for the death of her husband
had just expired.-Her object was 10 notify
her friends that size was ready to receive the
addresses of any one who was in want OF a
wife. To give such notification was, found
Chinooks The widow was of masculine
make, and what we woald call ouxom
dame. She was attended by seven others,
of small stature in comparison, who were
her Maids, and all evidently accompanied
her to do honor the on occasion. Every half
hour they would arrange themselves in a
row, and the widow at their head, affecting
modest downcast look, would commence
chaunt, informing the byslanders that her
period of mourning was out that she had
forgotten her deceased husband given her
grief 20 the winds, and was now ready TO
espouse another. This chaHnt was accom-.
panied by small movement oi the feet and
body, which, with the gutteral song and con-
sequent excitement of such an exhibition,
caused she fair ones to wax so warm that
the perspra,ion rolled down their painted
cheeks; this, with the crimson flush, oil
tended 10 add brilliancy to their dark eyes, as
they were now and then cast around upon
the multitude Of Indians, who seemed all
admiration.-I did not ascertain whether the
fair one succeeded in winning a second hus-
band, but am satisfied that her exerions
were such as ought 10 have obtained her
one.-U S. Exploring Expedition.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
A Hypothetical Case,

Some years ago, an awkward chap ir
western New-York who obtaided his liveli
hood by forgery, in blacksmith's shop, hr.
ed horse one day, te carry load O
wrought nails TO the next towa, few miles
distant. Through hrs own tskvardaess
and that Of tpe horse, and by e nl,sc. }ex
erliops of ,hetwo, a very pretlk .Gaias trs,phe
was brought about. While descending a
steep hill, the smith gave his animal few
extra cuts, thinking to accelerate his speed
in place where gravitation seconded the
motion of the whip, but the steed stumbled,
fouudefing into the ditch, and kicked--ihe
bucket. The blacksmith, upon turning The
body over, discovered that the anatomical
harmony Of The beasts neck was destroyed,
that the bone was dislocated beyond the
bone.setter's arr, and that in fact, the 'hoss"
was dead.
With rueful countenanoe, he repaired 10
the owner of the nag, and asked what mus.
be done!
The reply WINS "you must pay for the
horse"
The blacksmith demurred, went to con suit
a lawyer
The lawyer happened to he away from
home, but his wife, prone to mischevons
fun, thought she saw in the client food for a
little sport, and inviting him 10 enter the
house, remarked that she sometimes gave
legal advice In her husbands. absence, and
requested him 10 state his case.
'Very WELL" said the blacksmith, sealing
himself, leisurely, "I'll 'spose case"
"lf you please-that will do es well as 10
state your own" said the handsome a,tor.
ney.
swell yer see it's jest like this. Sposin
you war an cd hoss-an' should drive yer
--drive yer to mill. And sposn l should
cut yer up the leasiest mite on the flank, aid
you should rare up and kick ul,, and break
the breechin', and finally, yer should foil in :
TO the ditch, and break yer cussed neck
who'd pay for ye 2 would 81 asked the ex-
cited Vulcan, in voice Of thunder. ''No !
I'd be hammered into horse shoe nails, and
drove into the devils cloven foo. I'd pay The
fust red cent w
BY this time the volunteer counsellor had
retrea,ed TO the doc, of the apartment, and
after informing her client with courtesy
that his was plain case, and he need not
fear an actior for damages, she disappeared,
resolving never again to give legal advice to
her husbands customers.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
The Flight Of Time.

In reference to the flight of time, DR..
Spring once closed discourse in the follow.
ng graphic Language:
"I shall never address this audience a.
gain l shall never again meet them sbut at
the bar OF God. That interview seems in
deed far distant. But it will be soon as time
with his eagle wings, shall have finished tho
little remnant of his short career. ssAlter
death, the Judgment We die; but inter.
vening ages pass rapidly over those who
sleep in 'he dust. There is no dial plate
there on which 10 count the hours of time.
No longer is it told days, months, or years;
for The planets which mark these periods are
hniden from tHeir sight. Itssfiight Is no lon
ger noted by events perceived by The senses:
ior the ear is deaf and the eye is closed.
The business of life, which wakes at each
morning and ceases every night goes on a.
bove them; but 10 them all is silent and un-
seen. The greetings Of joy, and the voice
OF grief, the revolution Of empires and the
lapse of ages, send no sound within that mar.
row cell. Generation after generation are
brought and laid by their side the inscrip-
tion upon their monumental marble tells the
centuries that have passed away but TO the
sleeping dead The long intervals is unobset-
ved.-Like dream of the night, with the
quickness Of thought, the mind ranges limo
and space almost without a limit; there is
but momen, between the hour when the
eye is closed in the grave, when it wakes in
judgment aJ
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
Graves in the Sea.

The sea is the largest of cemeiries, and
its slumberers sleep without monument.
All other graveyards, in other lands, show
some symbol of distinction between the
great and the small, the rich and the poor !;
but in that ocean cemetry the king and the
clown, the prince and the peasant, are alike
undistingulshed The same waves roll over
all-the requiem by the minstrelsy of tho
ocean is sung 10 their honor. Over their re-
mains the same storm beats, and the same
sun shines and there unmarked, the weak
and the powerful, the plumed and the un.
honored, will sleep, until awakened by the
trump, when the sea will give up its dead
1 thought of sailing over the slumbering,
but devoted Goodman, who, after his brief
but brilliant career, perished in the President
--over the laughter.loving Power, who went
down in the same i'll. faied vessel, we may
have passed. In tLat cemeiry sleeps the
accomplished and pious Fisher; but where
he and thousands of others of the noble
spirits Of the earth lie, no one but God
knowest. No marble rises 10 point out
where there ashes are gathered, or where
the lover of the good and wise can 60 and
shed the tears of sympaihy-Who can tell
where lie the tens Of thousands of Africas
sons who perished in the middle passage 2
Yet the cemetry hath ornaments OF Jeho-
yah. Never can forget the days and
nights as passed over the roblest of the
cemetry without single human monument
Giles.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
Anew Way to Pop ,As Question.

tSally," said green youth, in a venera.
bic white hat and grey pants, through which
his legs projected half foot, perhaps more
n-"Sally, before we go into this 'ere Muse
nm 10 see the Enchanted Horse, I want to
ak you soipstbin." r
aWeli, Ichabod, what is II !"
ssWhy, you see this 'ere business is gwine
10 cost . hull quarter piece, and can't af-
ford to spend 90 much, for nuthin. Now, Ell
yo a'ltsay you'll have me, defn'd of don't
pay the hull ont myself. l willp'
Sally made non commiial reply, which
Ichsbpd inisrpseied to suit himself, and he
stfode mp two steps 2. time, and paid the
whole onsh a.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
Bnt lis all delusion .
The Church and the Tavern.

TOOK passage Ior Amertca an the goou
ship Providence, and l,nded at New York
in June l794. was then in my twenty
second gear. When The ship cast off from
the wharf, in Scotland, and swung around
with the breeze, my father stood upon the
shore. He waved last adieu, and exclaim-
ed, eRemember the Sabbath day!n l ar
rived atNew York on Saturday, and, the
next day being the Sabbath, al nine O'Clock,
A. NJ, three young men of our company
called at my lodgings. Ee
"Where are you going to-dayw they in
quired.
2 "To the church. replied.
awe have been ten weeks ut sea; our
health requires exercise. Let us walk out
to-day, and go to church next Sabbath"
they replied.
Said !, "You can go where you please,
but l'lI 60 10 church; the last words head
from my father were. Remember the Sab.
bafh day, and, had 1 mo respect for the
Fourth COMMANDMENT I have not yet for
gotten his last advice.n
They went TO the fields u went 10 the
church they spent forty or fifly cents in the
tavern; pun penny in the plate, in the
morning, afternoon, and night service total
three pence. They continued going into the
country, and IN process OF time the landla.
dy's daughter, and the landlady's niece
would join their company. Then each
couple hired a gig at two dollars day;
wine, cake, and ice cream on the road, fifty
cents each lime dine al Jamaica, Que dol
lar each. They got home at eight o'clock,
P. NJ, half drunk, and, having been caught
in thunder shower, their coats, hats, and
mantles were damaged !ifty per cent. They
arose the next morning al nine O'Clock, with
core heads, sore hearts, muddy boots, and
angry consciences, besides twelve dollars
lighter than when they started. l went 10
church, rose at five o'clock in the morning ;
head sound, heart light, bones refreshed,
conscience quiet, and commence the labors
Of the week in peace and plenty. They
were all mechanics-some OF them could
earn twelve dollars week. My business,
that of wrought nail maker, was poor the
cut nail machines had just gone into opera
ton which cut down my wages TO sha-
wing. With close application, could only
earn 6ve dollars and fifty cents per week
Never mind, the end Of the year, my
neutrality-suspicious. mad fine coats,
fine hats, powdered heads, and ruffled
shirts; but had one hundred hard dollars
piled in the corner of my chest. Having
lived fast, they died early. Nearly forty
winters are past, and forty summers ended,
since the last was laid in the Pote's, or some
oiher field while /, having received from
my Maker good constitution, (and COM
mon sense 10 take care Of it,) am as sound
in mind, body, and spirit, as was on this
day SO years ago, when first set my foot on
shore at Governors wharf, New York. Be-
. sides, ii is fact (ior which my family can
youch,) I,haye been only one day confined
90 the house by sickness, during all hat pe-
sioa.
Now, Mr. Printer, dare say you think,
with me, that the church on the Sabbath is
better than the tavern and the fields for the
iaboring man.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
The Last Appendix ,o'sYankee Doodle"

d. a il u
YANKEE DoopLg sent 10 Town
His goods for exhibition;
+ Everybody ran him down. ai @]f"
And laughed at his position:
They thought him all the world behind;
A goney, muf, or noodle
Laugh on, good people-never mind
Says quiet YANKEE DOODLE.
Chorus.--YANKEE DOODLE, SC.
YANKEE DoopLE had craft
A rather tidy clipper,
And he challenged, while they laughed,
The Bri.ishers TO whip her.
Their whole yacht-squadron she ouisped,
And that on their own water;
Oh all the lot she went ahead,
And they came nowhere arter.
Chortss-YANkEE Doodle, &c.
Ger Panama there was a scheme
Long talk'd Of 10 pursue a
Short route-which many thought Dream
By Lake Nicaragn.
JOHN BULL discussed the plan on foot,
With slow irresoluiion,
While YANKEE DOODLE went and put
II into execution
Chorus-YANKEE DoopLE, &c.
A steamer Of the COLLINS line,
YANKEE DoopLE's notion,
Has also quickest Gu, the brine
Across the Atlantic Ocean.
And British agents, noways slow
Her merits 10 discover,
Have been and bought her--iust 10 tow
fhe CUNARD packets over.
ChoruS.-YANKEE DOODLE, Sc.
Your gunsmiihs Of their skill may crack,
But that again don't mention
tguess that CoIT's revolvers whack
Their very first invention.
BY YANKEE DooDLE, too, you're beat
Downright in Agriculture,
With his machine tor reaping wheat,
Chaw'd up as by vullure.
Chorus-fANKEE Doodle, &c.
You also fancied, in your pride,
Which truly is iarnation,
Them British locks of your'n defied
The rosues of all creation;
But CHUBB's & BRHMAH's HoBBs has picked
And you must now be viewed all
AS having been completely licked
BY glorious YANKEE DOODLE.
Chorus.-YANKEE DooDLE, Sc.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
Gov. Johnston's sinking Fund.

II has been asceuainei that Gov. john
ston's sinking fund is situated in his right
breeches pocket, (the left one contains the
unsigned bill OF last session,) and that in.
addition TO the thirty dollars he received fef
travelling fees, and slSl SO for sixteen days
survives before he was Governor, it has re-.
Gently been considerable increased by
draughts from the State treasury for salary in
adpance.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

A Cold FiRE.-one cold night a jolly old
fellow who had partaken rather freely of flip
1.-THE tavern, started for home in a sleigh,
and on The way wasupset and left by the
side of the road. Some persons passing the
same way short timaafter, discovered, the
old fallow TO sitting posture, holding his
feet up to the moon, calculating 10 some in.
visible person "John, pile on the wood, Its a
Numbering cold nightp
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
!, COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA, THURSDAY, OCTOBER 9. 1851

misery or murder, how many children would
have been saved from the alms-houses, or
from growing up TO infamy, how many
wives and children would have been saved
from the anguish Of brutal blows, had wo.
men been endowed with The right of suff'
rage upon this question alone, only twenty
years aoo1
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
steaiisgs.

When Wings talk about Locofoco plum.
ders; they should Try not TO think of The thir-
ty dollars travelling fees, and the sI3I SO
for sixteen days services, fiched from the
Treasury by Gov. Johnston, without the
shadow Of law or equity in his favor.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

u A country clergyman, being opposed
TO the use of the bass-viol in church service,
was overruled by the congregation. The
first Sunday it was brought iuio use, he an.
nounced the psalm as follows :-''To praise
God, we will now fiddle The 46th psalm.
second part, short metre p
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

II He that thinks he sees another's
estate in pack of carJs, or box and dice,
and ventures his own in pursuit of it, should
not repine if he finds himself beggar in
the end @ l
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

TROUBLE OF HATING Hannah More said
10 Horace Walpole :--''lf wanted to pun
ish anenemy; il should be by fastening on
him the trouble of constantly hating some
bodY.n
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

n A lady upon taking up Shelly's nov
ell, "The Last Man." threw it down very
suddenly, exclaiming, "The last man! Bless
me if such thing ever was TO happen,
what would become of the women pt
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
THE STAR OF TIE NORTH
IL published euery Thursday Morning, by
80 r.. WEAVER, 81

OFFFCE--Up stairs in the NeD Brick building
on the south side Of Main street, third
square bslow Market.
TERMs Two Dollars per annum, if paid
within six months from the time of subscri
bing; two dollars and fifty cents if not paid
within the year. No subscription received
for a less period than six months no discon.
tinuance permitted until all arrearages are
paid, unless at the option Of the editors.
ADVERTISEMENTS not exceeding one square
win be inserted three times for one dollar, and
twenty-five cents for each additionl inser.
sion. a liberal discount ,ciH be made to those
who advertise By the gear.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09


Musical CATEcHIsm.-We find the follow.
ing afoat IN the papers
"What is a slur ~
"Alinost any remark one singer makes
bout another"
"What is rest ?"
tGoing out of the choir TO eat some re-
freshments during sermon time"
"Wh at is called singing with an under
standing o."
Marking time on the floor with your
footn
"What is staccaio movement ?"
Leaving the choir in huff, because one
is dissatisfied with the leader."
"What is swell2" pa
IA professor of music who pretends TO
know everything about the science, while
he cannot conceal his ignorance"
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

NATURE AND CosIoM.--Nature makes US
poor only when we want necessaries, but
custom gives the name Of poverty TO the
want Of superauilies.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

II Alexander Gum was discharged fiom
the Custom Court at Edinburg, for mall
practice. The entry in the books stands
thus '-A Gum was discharged for making
fasse report"
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

RELIGION OF HYPocRrTE--There are two
sides to every thing except the religion of q
hypocritet and that is ell outside.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

Rich AND Poon. LIVERY man is rich or
poor, according 20 the proportion between
bis desires and eDjoyments. I.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

w There is modest young lady in N.
York, who views objects with glasses, SO
that she may not see them with the naked
eva
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

AZ "Hiram, did you ever take an eme-
tic W
eyes, once, and blow me if it didn't
make me sick.n -
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

II A gentleman, looking at his watch
after midnight, cried--"lfs to morrow NOR
ming must bid you goodnight"
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

~ Slanderers are like flies that leap over
all mans good parts, TO light upon his sores.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09
! [oRIGlNAL.
TO THE MEMORY OF LUCY.

And has she gonea My eyes
Behold the record of the tomb -
And yet, cannot think il so.
Fen now, methinks see her face,
As II appeared in days gone by,
Radiant with smiles.
And hark that voice. 'tis hers -
hear il now as Ihave heard
1t oft before $50 sweet and gentle
That it seems more like the
Whispering of Angels, than Of
Human tongues.
But lis all delusion
She has gone Too pure 20 sojourn here,
She has been taken 10 the no ne
OF her Father, whore now she dwells,
In joys unspeakable.
We mourn but It's not right,
Z For what is loss 10 us, is gain TO her.
LUAP.
scHooLcRArr, Michigan, Sept, "a, ISL.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

If "runnins after :be women" be injuri-
GUS to health, how comes ii that physicians
last SO I? Please answer by return of mail.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

A late traveller, liz speaking of Egypt, says
Der products consist of wheat, flies, and sore
eyed children. So much for her crops. In
remarkiug on her commerce, he observes
that her imports are made up Of underdone
Englishmcn In pursuit of the pyfamids--
while her exports consist of the 81 me Eng
lishmen "done brown" and fleeing from
beggars ane bed-bubs. Nice country that.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

Ayoung gentleman who has just married
little understood beauty, says she would
have beer taller, but she is made of such
precious materials, that Nature could not af-
ford it. How full of sugar the honeymoon
makes one, don't it' A year from now
he'll be swearing about the house, because
his Sd fool OF wife has been cleaning
the cook-stove with his best shoe.brush.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

.R WIsrEa is fast approaching.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

For some complaints, a little good luck is
the best medicine in the world. Low spir.
its take their rise not SO often from burst
ing heart as from a collapsed pocket-b
We once knew map to be saved from SUI
eide by just raising his wages shilling
day.
The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-10-09

T Amaoitia est semplterna,.