Kenosha telegraph. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1850-1854, 1851-08-29
VOL. XII-NO. 10.


weeks since was poked out of very comfortable
office up the river, has betaken himself to Bangor
while 10 recover the wound inflicted upon his
feelings by our unpnncipled and immolating ad-
minstration.
Change of air must have had instant effect NJ
on his spirits, from Galena he writes us q very
amusing letter, which amongst other things tells
OF desperate quarrel that took place on board a
boat between real dandy tourist and real live
Yankee settler.
The latter tread upon the toes of the former,
whefeupon the former threatened to kick out of
the cabin the latter.
You'll kick me out of the cabng?'
'Yes sir, I'll kick you out of this cabin
you'll kick me, Mr. Hitchcock out of this cab
ingr
Yes sir, I'll kick you Mr. Hitchcock said the
dandy.
well, | guess said the yankee, very coolly,
after being satisfied that it was himself that was
in such imminent peril of assault" guess since
you talk, you never heard me tell about old Brad
ley and my mare there tn hump
No, nor do wish To-
well, guess it won't set you back much, any
how, as kicking is generally best to be consider
ed on
You see, old Bradley is one of these sancti-
monius, long faced hypocrits, who puts on a re-
ligious suit every Sabbath morning, and with
good deal of screwing, manages to keep il on till
after church in the afternoon. Well he had an
old roam mare that would jump over any sixteen
rail fence in Illinois, and open any barn door that
had mt paddock on it. Two o. three times
found her in my stable and told Bradley about
1t, and he was very sorry-an unruly animal
would watch her, and hull lot of such things,
all said in serious manner with face twice as
long as old Deacon Fara's on Sabbath day.
knew all the time he was lying, and so
watched him and his old roam tn, and for three
nights regular, old roam cum to my stable about
bedtime, and just about daylight old Bradley
would cum, bride her and ride off. then Just
took my mare down to the blacksmith shop and
had some shoes made with corks ABOUT four inch
es long and had EN- nailed on her hind feet
Your heels, mister, amt nothin' to 'em. took
her hum and Civ her about ten feet halter, and
tied her in the center of the stable, fed her with
oats about nine O'Clock, and taking good smoke
went to bed, and knowing that my old mare was
a truth telling animal, and that she would give
good report of herself in the morning. WASN'T
fairly asleep before the old CONAN hunched me.
and wanted to know what on earth was the mat.
ter out at the stable Says | 90 to sleep Peggy
it's nothing but Kate-she is kickin' off the flies
guess.
Purity soon she hunched me agin, and says she,
MIR. Hitchcock, du git up and see what in the
world is the matter with Kate
Lay still, Peggy, Kate will take care of her.
self, guess
Wal, the next mornin' about daylight, Brad
ley, with his bride in his hand cum to the stable
and as true as the book of Genesis, when he saw
the cd roans sides, head and starn he cussed and
swore worse than you did when | cum down on
your toes.
AFTER break fast that morning, Joe Davis cum
TO my house, and says he
'Bradley's old roam is nearly dead, she's cut all
TO pieces, and can scarcely move
j want to know says |, how on arth did il
happen p
Now, while we were talkn' up cum that ev-
erlastin hypocr', old Bradley, and says he to me,
Mr. Hitchcock, my old roam is ruined
'Du tell says |.
She's all cut to pieces says he; du you
know whether she was in your stable the other
mght?'
wal mister, with this let out Du know
it? The Yankee here illustrating, made a sud-
den advance upon the dandy, who made way for
him unconsciously as it were.
Dol know it? you no.souled, squash-headed
old night owl, you-you hay.hooking, corn.crb-
bling, fodder-fudging, cent-shaving, whiting of
nothing, you-Kate kicks like a mere dumb
beast, but l have reduced the thing to SCI
ence.'
The Yankee had not ceased to advance, or the
dandy in hisastonishment, to retreat and the mo-
ton of the latter being accelerated by apparent
demonstration to suit the action to the word he
found himself in the social hail tumbling back
wards over pile ofbaggage, and tearing the knee
of his pants as he scrambled up, perfect scream
oflaughter stunning him from all sides.
The defeat was total; a few moments after he
was seen dragging his own trunk ashore while
Mr.. Hitchcock finished his story on the boiler
deck.-M Louis ReriUe.