Sunbury American. [volume] (Sunbury, Pa.) 1848-1879, 1851-03-15

horse and have something cooling wrap
around my fingers; and then again, l didn't
want TO make any noise, till wife had seen
how nice I had fixed her things. Well.
wife she hurried and dressed herself and
went out into the kitchen to fill up the tub,
and in a few minutes | overheard her say
10 herself, says She
'Good Heavens and earth What does
all this l never. put these things to soak
John! John! Get up and come here, do.
Il am under strong impressions, gentle
men. that this customer wasn't very slow
in his movements about that time for in
less than forty seconds, | was there, and
SAYS L
whats the matter, Susan? What's the
matterp
why do look here, says she, somebody
has put all OF my brSt clothes in this tub,
and then put something on them which has
entirely ruined themn
'Ha, ha, han says /, 'well Susan, sup
pose might as well own up TO the joke at
once, Tor my hands ache so that ] can't hold
in any longer. Its nothing but 'cnshing-
I.i'
bing, and it's wei! it does, for no pair of
hands in this world could stand it to do the
rubbing. | got up this morning while you
were asleep, and done up the whole wash
ing, and hung part oil 'em out on the fence
to drv.'
'Whle / was saying this, wife she took
tIlttIe stick, and in trying to lift out Of the
N f. At, :, ~,
mcnts-by ginger the tarnal thing burst
IN two right through the middle! one
half holding on to The stick and tothef fall
ing back into the tub Although / was
suffering from my burnt hands, and was as
mad as a Green Mountain catamount, at
what the lnf-rnal FLUID had done, couldn't
a kept from laughing at that moment, ifId
dind for it,
"WIie took peep at the clothes on the
fence-caIled up the young doctor to dress
my hands, and then set down and had
good crying spell. The Doctor hurried in
the room, and after seeing wife sitting in
the rockng-chair crying, and me walk
ing the room and groaning like a fall wind
in graveyard, says he
Sin the name of calornel and hot-Ialep
what's the matter now?'
Nothing PARTICULAR says J, 'only Tve
5nrnt up all the clothes in the house and
both Of my hands, with bottle Of thunder
in waShing-nuid that Pve been experiment.
ing WITH
'The Doctor looked at my hands, and
says he
'Where's the botte!'
'Out on the door-step.' says I.
'The doctor went and looked at the bot
tie, and thea went out IN the woodshed and
took a peep at the old beer-bottIeS and
clearinghouse, and after swearing little
to himself, came back into the kitchen, and
says he
We'll, you have immoralized yourself,
and no mistake, and you shall be known
hereafter as the WASHING FLUID EXPERl-
MENTGR.'
What in the thunder are you laughing
at says /.
Why says he, 'your bottle of washing
huid stands on the shelf where you put it,
suppose, and you have used quart and a
hall of the best quality of oil Of uitriol, that
I'yr had on hand these sxmonths.'
'Gentleman, Pm a man that don't use pros
fame language only in extreme cases, but if
didn't make the atmosphere in that room
/ blue for few moments, then twas because l
( didn't know how. | went and smashed up
/ the uncorked fluid bottle, and swore eternal
enmity TO everything of the kind, and we've
always washed our clothes in the old fashion
way ever since and it man ever offers me
bottle OF the internal stuff again he has got
to be a smarter man than ! an or take a
thrashhg.'
BY the time our loquacious Vermonter
had finished his very interesting washing
fluid story, our stage had arrived at Vienna,
where, as good luck would have it, part OF
I. our passengers left, including all of the
children, and the dealer in patent transpar-
ent washng-Auid, so that during the remain
ing part Of the trip, we h4d very lively
and pleasant time.