The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1851-06-14
From lie TMkee Blade.
How A Constable made His First L evy.

=
In one Of the interior counties Of Ten
neSsee, an illiterate man named Jake
Short, who of law matters, it might tru-
ly be sald--'did not know as much as
the law allows him'-by some chance
was elected constable.
The next day he was met by a neigh
Dor striding like military officer, with
his saddleb bags on his arm.
Hold on Jake, says he.
The wheels of government never
stop!
Going to make levy?
Yes, got the documents IN my saddle
bags.
You had better look out, the last man
in lost by not doing his business accord
ing to law
Don't catch me- am up to how it is
done, answered the new made official,
proudly, never turning his mead as he
strobe along.
Let me see, soliloquizes he, am to
distrain for rent, attach all the property
| can lay hands on.
When he arrived at the tenement, he
found 1t vacated, and no visible means
left.
Whew-where am | to make my
mileage-a pillar ofthe State must have
sharp eyes-goyernment expects it.
After seeing about the houses and
bushes for sometime he espicd an anti
quated porker and her little ones.
Attentive got 'cm--l say Pm some
he calculated, as he crept silly around
and caught the unSuspectng porker by
the kink in hernarrative, that he might
lay hands on, and go according TO law
for he had seen prisoner taken by
Shaping him on the shoulder while the
process was read,) shouting Gas lie had
heard at court )--Ilear ye-hark ye--
l--attach-you. All this time the por-
ker had been up and doing herbest ticks,
but Jake's motto being never give il up
So hung on to the forlorn hope like
death TO departed colored gentleman.
The poet thus beautifully describes a
similar catastrophe,
Jack fell down, and jill came tumbling after
The porker fell-and a wheel of gov
eminent was suddenly heels over head
making a six feet measure and fractu-
ring some jean. The porkcr, owing
perhaps to her having more propelers
than the pillar, got under way first, the
little ones doing tall specimen Of mi
grating all the time. Not very profit
able office, groaned Jake as he surveyed
his diiapidated habiliments. But sworn
officer must do his duty and go accord
ing to law.
He now went ii strong--it was nip
and tuck for about quarter, he then
gained, and ended the contest by poun-
cling like "a duck on June bug nab
bling the porker by the organs of hear
ing.
Hear ye-hear ye-hear ye-I COM
mand you to appear at 9 o'clock on Sat
urday lext at jim Parker's grocery
(the porker was going her death on it in
the little matter Of brouge, Jake looked
around for the little ones-not one OF
which was to be SEEM and bring with
you that passle of cussed pigs, for in the
eyes of the law you are accountable for
'em. Fail not to appear under the pam
Of the penalty laid down in the Law
Books. This is done by me a sworn Of
fcer, and as the law directs.
As he had done his duty he loosed his
hold, the porker no doubt beng account
able for the appearance of the little
ones, was in so great hurry to join
them that she got her head bothered
with the understanding Of Jake, and sad
to relate, pillar Of the State fell and
great was the fall thereof
The next day the following was found
sticking on tree:
NOTICE.-At Jim Parker's Grocery
at 8 o'clock on Saturday next, will
expose an old SOW and passe Of pigs
more or less-who will appear as the
Law directs to be distrained for rent.
JAKE SHORT, Constable.