Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1851-06-12
III ran to seize my precious little charge,


and glaring eyes, looking like ferocious
lioness eager for her prey.
The keeper limited that we had better
withdraw from her sight, which was ex-
peditiously done. Wandering what cause
could have so suddenly inhamed the wo-
man to madness, as soon as we were in
another room, ventured to ask the keep
er to crafty my inquisitiveness. He
complied as follows:
That woman, sir, though she now
raves SO fiercely, is at most times as gen.
tie and as afiectionate as the child you
have hold of by your haud. 1t was in
one of her gentlest and most placid
moods, when by dint Of kind words and
pleasant stories, had drawn her in So
cial converse beyond what l had ever
done before, that she gave something like
the following account of the strange in
sanity, whose unhappy victim she is:
"I was not always just such wo-
man, sir, as you now see me; was once
innocent, free, girlish, and happy. My
parents-may God have taken them to
rest-werc blessed with only two chill
dren-daughters. was the eldest Of the
two. William Stanly came into our quiet
little village, and became his. Words
needs not attempt to describe the depth
or the strength of the affection bore
him. We loved, believe, as human be-
inss had never loved before. Every time
I looked on his manly face and form, my
eyes grew wild, almost, with rapture. l
thought there could never have been crea-
ted another like him. We were married.
Years passed on, but no offering blessed
our union. MY heart began to sink. I
knew needed help from another source
to- hold me up. | was sorely, bitterly
disappointed. This had been the high
hope of my heart, to behold my own i'm.
age stamped on another. I could love
my William to distraction, but it was not
with the love that felt yearning within
me towards child I wished to call mine.
l thought of adopting some pitable, dcs-
titute orphan; but then l felt that that
would have been only gratifying my pity
and my sympathy, not feeding my burn
ing love. bethought me of every expe-
riment. I prayed to Heaven. | turned
my mind on every side ofme. tried to
become contentcd, but only grew more
restless, more uneasy. | set my heart on
this object for years, and my disappoint.
ment was only proportioned to the
strength of my hopes. Mortal creature
cannot conceive my misery-its intensity,
its bitterness, its raging ferceness. 1t
seemed as if my existence were all swal-
lowed up in the vortex of this one object
and purpose.
"' While 1 thus suffered, and my heart
was daily coroding, my younger sister
was married. In due course of time, a
child was born to her. Oh, God, how
bitter were my feelings then! thought
not to be responsible for what felt
All the depths of my misery were stirred
over again. reproached myself I
cursed my God. l felt myself outcast.
Tcared not what became of me. From
daily and weekly seeing my sisters child
grow in beauty, | became more enraged.
The sight of it some times made the hot
burning blood mount to my cheeks, and
feared what / might do, actually trem-
bled at my own thoughts. Where the
suggestions that entered my mind came
from, it was difficult for me to imagine.
l did not try to imagine; | cared not
whence they came, SO exquisite, yet so
extreme was their torture. Her child
grew larger and stronger daily. l used
to take her in my arms-the little angel
and when l put my face down to hers,
and looked in her large blue eyes, and
saw the reflection of my own wild fea-
ture in them, | fairly tremblcd with af.
fright. The child seemed to return my
gaze, as if she could read my tortured
soul in its very depth. I grew afraid to
hold her in my arms. / knew not what |
might do. Still, she would cry to have
me take her, and sometimes, even though
my eycballs seemed fairly to hiss and
snap as they rolled about in their SOCK
cts, shrunk from her, Lcannot tell why.
&c AS she grew more beautiful and
more interesting, so she seemed to love
me more and more. l thought she was
born in the world to pursue my soul with
torments. The more became infamed,
the closer would she clasp me with her
little white arms. She smiled at me,
when my very look, haggard and fright
ful as it was, should have made her scream
with terror. Her pretty little finger play.
ed with my lips, and pokcd at my eyes,
rs if she would open them when I shut
them close, for very fear Of looking at
at her. She played with my curls, and
threw her soft arms about my neck. She
soon learned to pronounce my name, and
seemed to be as much delighted with me
as with her own mother; nay more, she
would cry for me when for her mother
seemed to care nothing.
"' Her mother left her alone with me
one summer afternoon. Oh, can ever
forget that afternoon The sun was just
going into his decline; soft winds whis-
pered gentle voices in my ears; birds
warbled out their JOY in the cool recess
ses of the thick leaves; the air was as
bland and enchanting as they say it is in