Des Moines courier. ([Ottumwa] Iowa) 1848-1854, 1851-08-29
Kicking a Yankee.

TIC SottO"iuS uuS Uctu SbtHS ui'
rounds of the newspapers for some time
but is one of those things that will bea
reading as often as once year, at least
A very handsome friend of ours, VIII,
a few weeks since was spoken of for 1
very comfortable Office up the liver, has
belaken himself to Bangor while ,o
recover the wound inflicted upon his feel
ings by our unPrincipled aud immolating
administration.
Change Of air must have had ins,an,
elfec, upon his spirits, for from Galena
he writes us a very amusing letter,
which amongst other things, tells Of a
desperate quarrel that took place on board
The boat between a real dandy tonrisl
and real live Yankee settler. The
latter tread on the toes of The former;
whereupon the former threatened 10
"kick out of the cabin" The latter.
you'll kick me ou, OF the cabing!'
"Yes sir, LII kick you out of this
cabin!'
"lou'll kick me, Mr.. Hitchcock, ou,
of this cabiDg!"
Yes, sir, Ill kick you. Mr.. Hitchcock.
"Well, l guess" said The Yankee,
coolly. after being satisfied that it was
himself that stood in such imminent per.
il of assault, IL guess since you talk you
never heard me tell about old Brady
and my mare. there 10 hun!'
"No, sir nor do wish
"Wall guess i, won't set you back
much, any how, as kicking is generally
bes, TO be considered. You see, old
Brady is one of those sanc,imonious
Iong-faced hypocri,es, who puts on a
religious suit every sabbath morning,
and with good ddea!of screwing manages
TO keep it on till after church in The after.
noon. Wall. he had an old roam mare
that would jump over any sixteen rail
fence in Illinois, and open any barn tha,
hadn', paddock on it. Two or three
times | found her in my stable, and !
Told Brady about il, and he was very
sorry--an unruly animal--would watch
her, and hull lot of such things, all
said in serious manner, with face
twice as long as old Dracon's Fara's ON
a Sabbath dav.
IL knew al. the time he was l.. ing, and
as watched hlm and his old roam lew,
and for three nights regular, old roam
cam to my stable about bedtime, and
just about daylight old Brady would
cum, bride her aud ride off. then just
tux my mare down TO the blacksmith
shop and had some shoes made with
corks about four inches long, aud had
'em nai.ed on her hind feet. Your heels,
mister, amt nothin' 10 'em. TUX her
her hum, and gave her about ten feet OF
the halter, and tied her in the center ol
The stable, fed her with oats about nine
O'Clock and taking good smoke wen, to
bed, knowing that the old mare was a
Iruth-tellng animal, and that she would
givea good report of herself In the morn
ing. ! wasn't fairly asleep before The old
CONAN hunched me and wanted 10 know
what on arth was the matter ou, at the
stable. Says !, go To sleep, Peggy, its
nothing but Ka,e-she is kickin' OFF the
flies. guess. Purity soon she hunched
me agin, and says she. '.Mr. Hitchcock,
dew gil up and see what in the world is
the matter with Kate" LAY still Peg
gv, Kate will take care OF herself,
guess" Wall, the next mornin' about
dayllght, Brady, with his bride in his
hand. cum To the stable, and as true as
the book Of Genesis, when he saw the
old roan's sides, head and stern, he cuss-
ed and swore, worse than you did when
cum down on your toes.
"Ar.er breakfast that mornin', Joe
Davis cum To my house, and says he:
"Bradly's old roam is nearly dead
she's Gu, all to pieces, and can scarcely
move
IL want TO know" says |, show on
arth did it happen!'
Now while we were ialkin, up cum
that e,erlasiin' hypocri,e, Brady. and
says he, "Mr. Hitchcock. my old roam
is ruined"
"Dew TELL" says /.
ashes all cut to pieces" says he; do
you know whether she was in your sta
BILE last night!"
"Wall. mister with this lie, out. "Do
| know it!" the Yankee here illustrating.
made sudden advance upon the dandy.
who made way for HIM unconsciously
as il were. dol know i,!" you no
socled, sauash-.eaded old nigh. owl, you
-you hay-hooking, corn cribbin. fodder
Judging, cent shaving, whit,ling Of moth
in, you-Kaie kicks like mere dumb
beast; but I've reduced The thing TO a
science" The Yankee had not ceased
TO advance, or the dandy, in his astonish-
ment. to retreat. and the motion of the
latter being accelerated. by an apparen,
10 suit the action TO .he
word. he found himself in The ..social
hall. ,umbling over a pile Of baggage.
and tearing the knees Of his pants as he
scrambled up. perfect scream Of laugh
Ter stunning him from all sides. The
defeat was total; a few moments after he
was seen dragging his trunk ashore.
while Mr.. Hitchcock finished his story
ON the boiler deck.-.N. Louis ReriHe.
EV@ A Latter coma IN the noStnfHep