Lewisburg chronicle. [volume] (Lewisburg, Pa.) 1850-1859, 1851-08-06
The Nervous Gentleman.
"REMINISCENCES BY AN ENGLISH PHYSICIAN.


> The most troublesome patient which
!. medical man can possibly have, is ner
a Gus, fdgety, hypochonarchical gentleman
o and were it not that such patients are rath'
profitable, the members of the medical pr
: fession would raise a great outcry upo
the subject, and nerves and nervousness
would be rated borcs instead Of being al
tended with great gravity, and prescribe
for with great regularity, the ordinar
medicine" given consisting of bread pill
rolled in magnesia, and effervescing drau't
of adj HJitum,, according to the patient
credulity and purse. I am retired ply
sician now, so I can afford to be littl
candid now and then.
Nearly twenty years ago, there lived il
Bloomsbury Square one ofmy best patients
by name Augustus Brown.
Mr.. Brown was gentlemen Of compe
tent independence, and of literary an,
virtuous turn of mind At about fort,
years of age, he began to study medicine
little, and to take care of his health I
great deal. He bought medicine books
prowled about the wards of hospitals, ant
made himself as unhappy as any comfor
table, middle-aged, single gentleman coul'
wish to be- Learned these particulars o
him from a friend who recommended hin
to me.
When I was first called to attend him
not knowing that his diseases were all i'm
aginary, l was quite taken in for about
quarter of an hour or so.
1 found him lying on his back on the
sofa, the room darkened, and he was
groaning in an extremity Of anguish. ]
turned to his housekeeper, who had mar.
shalled me in, and said: What is the
matter with Mr.. Brown?
He heard me, and called out What is
the matter-the matter Oh! oh oh!
1 advanced towards him, and said, !
am sorry to find you so indisposcd, sir.
Oh! oh! oh! was his only answer.
Perhaps, I continued, you will have the
kindness to describe your symptoms
After few preparatory groans, he COM
menced, d,I-ok,-ehl-ah! you'll scarcely
believe it, but look at my leg down to
my ankle, L mean. Oh! oh oh !! horrible,
horrible.
I cast my eyes down to his ankle, and
to my surprise, saw that it was tied fast by
silk handkerchief to the leg Of the sofa.
What is this for? / said.
You may well ask-oh oh!
Whatever may be the matter with your
ankle, shall undo this most unsurgical
and very improper bandage.
Wretch be cried, would you destroy
me?
Destroy you?
Yes. What dependence have L, if I am
not ied,what hold upon the world have 1 :?
What do you mean? said l.
Listen, he said.
Well.
I am too LIGHT.
Too light?
Yes
Pray, sir, explain yourself.
You know why balloon goes up?
Yes, surely.
Why?
Because it is lighter than an equal bulk
Of air.
Very good.
Well-but, sir, how does that
Apply to me, you would say, Doctor?
Exactly.
This way. I am lighter than an equal
bulk of air, and if 1 was not tied down,
Whit should 60 up-up-up! Oh! it's
dreadful!-oh! oh! ah!
He always put in the ah as if he had
been suddenly seized with some dreadful
pain, and it really had q most comical
effect.
1 now saw through the case in mo-
ment, and said, are you sure you are not
mistaken
Mistaken! he cried.
Yes.
You ought to know better. A friend Of
mine told me you were very clever man.
What! suppose now, I said, you were
to allow me to undo this handkerchief.
Up I should go he roared, and if the
window was open out I would sail.
Indeed, I said.
Yes, he continued I have very slight
hold upon the earth. For some days I
found myself getting lighter, until at last
you see I am forced to tie myself down. oh!
oh
Suppose I hold your collar, said ]; I;while
the handkerchief is taken off,
I don't mind, he replied, just to con-
vince you.
1 therefore held his collar with one