Southern standard. [volume] (Columbus, Miss.) 1851-1856, 1851-03-29
Buying a Farm.

! Brooks who lived in Dobson county North
Carolina, wanted to buy a tract of land near him.
and concluded to despatch one Angus McAlpin to
Charleston, South Carolina, to buy it from the
owner, who lived there. All the necessary ar
rangements were made. Angus started off, and
in due time Brooks would take his seat and look
down the road, in the hope of seeing his agent
returning. At last he appeared, and the moment
he neared the house, Brooks aecosted him
We'll, Mac, have you got the land 90
The agent, in whose face was anything but sum
shine, replied somewhat gruffiy, that he might
let body get down from his horse, before he put
at him with questions of business. -
But Brooks was in fever of anxiety, and re-
peated the question.
''Did you get 90
"Pshaw, now Brooks, don't press upon body
in this uncivil way. 1t is a long story, and must
have time. -
Brooks still urged, and Mac still parried the
question till they got into the house
"Now, surely, thought Brooks, she will tell
me" F." But Mac not quite ready.
g Brooks, . said he, ''have you got anything
to drink -
To be sure l have, - said the other, and i'm
medately had some of the best forth coming.
Having moistened his clap, Mac took seat and
his employer another. Mac gave a preliminary
hem! He then turned suddenly around to Brooks
looked him in the eyes, and slapped him on the
thigh
g Brooks says he, ''was you ever in Charles
tou 90
''Why you know I never was, - replied the
other
"Well then, Brooks, % says the agent, "you
ought to go there. The greatest place upon the
face of the earth. They've got houses there on
both sides of the road for five miles at a stretch
and d-n the horse track the whole way through
Brooks, L think | met five thousand people in a
minute, and not chap would look at mel They've
got houses there on wheels. Brooks, | saw one
with six horses hitched to it, and big driver and
a long whip going it like whrlwind. followed
it down the road for a mile and half and when
it stopped | looked, and what do you think there
was? Nothing in it but one little woman sit
ting up in one corner.
''Well, Brooks, turned back up the road and
as was riding along | sees fancy looking chap
with long curly hair hanging down his back, and
his boots as shiny the face of an up-country
nigger [ called him into the middle of the road
and asked him a civil question, and civil ques-
tion you know Brooks, calls for civil answer, all
over the world. Il say, says |, Stranger, can
you tell me where Col. Lamer lives?' and what
do you think was the answer-"Go to grass yOu
fool -
sWell, Brooks, l knocks along up and down.
and about, until at last finds out where Col. La
mer lived. | gets down and bangs away at the
door Presently the door was opened by as pref
ty. fine spoken, well dressed woman as ever you
seed in your born days, Brooks. iSlks, silks thar
every day Brooks.
''Says l, Mrs. Lamer, presume madam, -
says l.
&c | am Mrs. Lamer, sir. -
I" Well, madam, - says I, 'sI have come all
the way from North Carolina to see Col Lamer--
to about buying a tract of land from him that's
up in our parts. .
"Then," she says &C Col Lamer has rode in
the country, but will be back shortly. Come in,
sir, and wait awhile. I've no doubt the Colonel
will soon return, and she had a smile upon that
pretty face of hers that reminded body of
spring morning.
"Well, Brooks hitched my horse to brass
hing on the door, and walked in.
well, when | got in l sees the floor all cover
I'd with the incest looking thing, nicer than any
patched work bed quilt you ever seed in your life,
Brooks. | was trying to edge along around 1t, but
VI sees niger stepping right over it
Thinks l, if that niger can go it | can too. So
right over it goes and takes my seat right before
picture, which at first, thought was little man
looking in at the window.
''Well, Brooks, there | sot waiting and waiting
or Col. Lamer, and at last-he did mt come, but
hey began to bring in dinner. Thinks l to my
SELF here's scrape. But | made up my mind
% tell her that if she asked to cato tell her
with genteel bow, that l had no occasion to eat
But, Brooks, she didn't AK me to eat-she asked
me if I'd be so good to carve that turkey for
her, and she did it with one of them lovely smiles
that make the cold streaks run down the small of
fellows back.
Certainly madam, says I, and walks up to
the tabe-there was on one side of the turkey a
great big knife like bowie knife, and fork with
a trigger on the other side.
:" We'll, | falls to work, and in the first effort /
splashed the gravy about two yards over the viii
test tabe-cloth you ever seed in your life Brooks.
Well, felt the steam begin to gather about my
cheeks and eyes. Bat, I'm not man to back out
for trifes, so makes another effort and the darn
ed thing took fight and lit in Mrs. Lamars
lap
'sWell, you see, Brooks, then I was taken with
a blindness, and the next thing | remember, was
upon the hath kicking. Well by this time be-
gan to think of navigating So goes out and
mounts Rosum, and puts for North Carolina
Now, Brooks, goa don't blame me DO goa?
From the Indiana State Sentinel.
Tho n,iIv that uoUar Doad Nnucna