Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1851-09-25
ONE etAss roo MUCH.
THE wIFE.s Nlenr-cAP.

Mr., who doesn't live more than .
mile from the post office in this city, mek
some Northern men with Southern princi{
Piles, the other eTening, aud in extending to
them the hospitality Of the Crescent City,
visited so many Of oar princely Saloons and
Marble Halls, imbibing spiritual cOnseIs-
lien as they journeyed, that when he left
them at their hotel at the midnight hour, be
felt, decidedly felt that he had brick in
his hatn Now, he has wife, an amiable,
accomplished and beautiful lady, whe loves
him aeYetealy, and finds but one fault with
him. That is his too frequent visits 20 the
places where those :. bricks are obtained.
After leaving his friends Mr.-----.s
/ paused l1aeRlent, tosk his beayiak IS and havs
ling shaped a course, on the principle that
9eontiRual angles meet, made sail for home
1 In due course Of time he arrived there and
was not very much astonished, but rather
frightened to End his worthy lady sitting up
for him. she always does She smiled
when he came in. Thatalso she always does
How are you, dear 4. n she said---'yod
staid cut so late, that feared yeu had been
taken sick
: Hic-ains sick wife-b.but don't you
th-think I'm Pin little ttight2'
A rery little perhaps, my dear-but that
is nething-you hayeso many friends, as you
say, you jastjOin them in a glassSonee in .
Whil6 7
Wife you're too gso1dedl-ththe truth. is,
I'm id drunkp
Oh, no indeed, my dear-I'm sure thSt
even another glass would Mt hurt you Now
suppose you take glass Of Scotch ale with
me, Just as anighteap, dear
GU are too kind my d.deAr, BY half-7I
know I'm d-drunk
9b,t no-only julep too much, love
that's all
Yes-juieps- McMastsrs make such stiff
snes =
Well-take glass of ale st any rate--1.
i can't hurt you, dear l want one before
retire
The lady FASTENED to open bottle, and
as she placed two tumblers on the side
board, she put in one very powerful emetic-
Filling the glasses with the foamibg ale, she
hamded one 10 her husband
Suspicion came cloudily upon his mind
She never before had been 50 kind when he
! was drunk He looked at the glass,-rais-
!: ed it to his lips,-then hesitated,
Dear w-wonit YOU taste mine, to make il
sweet-sweeterf said he i:
Certainly, love 7 replied tho lady, taking
a meuthful, which she Fasydry careful nOt
10 swallow
4 Suspicion vanished, and 80 ,dia the ale, 4.
metic and all, down the throatof the satisfied
husband After spitting out the taste, the
lady finished her glass, but seemed in no
hurry to retire She fixed foot.tub Of Wa
ter before an easy chair, as if she intended
. to battle her beautiful feet therein But
small az were those feetathere was not water
enough in the tub to cover them The hus-
band began 70. fss} aud be wanted to retire.
Wait oul5s few minutes dear said his
loving spouse | vaatto read the news il
this afternoons Delta / found ii in your
pocket IS
a few minutes more elapsed and Ahsn---
and then ;-oh we gods and Dan O. the lake,
what time The husband was placed IN
the easy chair. lie began 10. understand
why tie tub was there hesoon learned whas
allied him Suffice it to say the brick ha4
left his hat 1t hasn't been there since He
says he'll never drink another julep he oanR
bear Scotch ale, but be is sdeQth on lemonade!
He loves his wife better than ever
Reader, -this is a truthful story. Prsft
4byitsa moral