The Plymouth pilot. (Plymouth, Marshall County, Ind.) 1851-1852, 1851-10-15
HUMOROUS.

DO you think people are troubled as
much with flea DICTIONARY now, doctor,
as they used to be before they discovered
the anti-bug bedstead? asked Mrs. Par
tington of doctor of the old school, who
attended the family where she was stay
ing. 'Phlebotomy, madam said the
doctor, gravely, SIS remedy, not dis
ease We'll, WE'LL replied she; mo won
der one gets 'em mixed up. there is so
many Of EN-: we never heard in old
times of trousers in the throat. or embar-
goes in the head, or neurology all over
us, or CONSERVATION in the bowels, as
we do nowadays. But it's an i'll wind
that don't blow nobody good, and the
doctors flourish on it like green baize
tree. But of course they dom: have any
thing to do with it-they can't make 'em
come or CO. The doctor stepped out
with genteel bow, and the old lady
watched him till his cabriolet had turned
the corner, her mind revolving the intri-
cate subject of cause and effect.
able white hat and gray pants, through
which his legs projected half foot, per-
haps more-'Sally, before we go into
this ere Museum to see the Serenaders,
want to ak you somthin'. We'll, Icha-
bod. what is it?' why. you see this'ere
business is gwine to cost hull quarter a
piece, and | can't afford to spend so
much fur nuthin'. Now, eff you'll say
you'll hav me, darnd eff don't pay the
hull ont myself. l willp Sally made a
non-committal reply, which Ichabod in
terpreted to suit himself, and he strobe
up two steps at time, and paid the
whole ont.
Two brothers went into speculation
to sell itch ointment. One went thro'
Georgia to buy farm, and shook hands
with all the farmers and children on the
route. In about two weeks, the other
followed with an itch ointment and
found great demand for his remedy.
One day last summer, the teacher of a
certain district school in New England
after putting the usual questions. 'Whc
President?' What State do you live
in?' &c; to Juvenile class, asked g lit
tie boy what was his fathers name
Isaac, he answered promptly. Spell
Isaac said the teacher. Eve | z-i-c-h
sac, Izacc." The other scholars laughed
out right at this new way of spelling ;
common name; but commanding silence
he set the lad right, and proceeded will
his questions. what is your mother.
name?' Rachel, sir Spell Rachel.
Wretch, Rach, hell The smar
boy was Immediately given the reward
of merit, and dismissed.
Jeems, my lad, keep away from tn,
gals. Ven you see one coming. dodge
Just such critter as that young I'll
cleanin' the door step on t'other side o
the street. fooled your poor dad, Jimmy
If it hadn't been for her, you and yer da,
might ha' been in Californey huntin' di
nuns, my son.
A minister was walking out one da,
and passed two little boys, one of whom
made bow. As he turned back, hear,
the following conversation: why John
didn't you know that was parson M
Yes, of course 1 did, Why did you no
mske bow to him?' why, my mo
Their don't belong to his church.
Two men were seen Juggling away at
beafsteak as tough as pawnbrokers con
science. A literary gentleman presen
remarked that it reminded him of tn
works of an old author When aske
whose, he replied 'Chaucers.' (Chaw- sirs.
i am light-headed, as the fellow sal