New-York daily tribune. [volume] (New-York [N.Y.]) 1842-1866, 1851-07-18

IN y hich there ls some real approach ID that
unlon and blending Of characters and cl h'es,
which The Theory OF TIC relation contenplates as
is ideal standard BIZ: II We look to the great
majority Of cases. the eicc; Of womcn's legal IL
ferlorly on The character both OF women AMI OF
men mus. he painted IA far darker cOlors- We
DO not speak here Of the gTosseE orltaitles, nor
ot the mans power - seize on The woman
earnings. or compel her 20 I've with hlm against
her VIII We do not address ourselves 10 an
one who requires 10 have ]: proved that these
thing sholld be remetied. We suppose ave.
age cases, IN which there i Hel'hsl oo'hPo't
llnior nor conplcte disunlon OF feelings and OF
character and we affirm tha, IN such cases the
influence OF the dependence on the woman s SIDE
i demoralzlng TO the character OF both.
Tho common opinion Is, that whatever may be
the case with the intellectual. the moral ln1u-
encc Of women over men j. almost always saul
tarv. II i, we are often told, the great counter
active Of sefshness. However the case may DC
as 10 oersonal Influence, the influence OF tne po-
sition tends emnently to promote selhsAnesS.
The most insignificant of men, the man who can
Obtain influence or consideration nowhere else.
finds one place where he Is chef and head.
There is one person. often greatly his superior IN
understanding. who Is obliged 20 consult HIM,
and whom he Is not obliged 10 consult he i
nudge. magistrate. ruler. over their lont con-
Germs arblter of all differences between them.
~
must he made. Is his justice and conscience: It
is his to hold the balance and adjust the scales
between ms own claims or wishes and those OF
another He is now the only tribunal, IN civil
lZed life IN which the same person l. Judge anu
party generous mind. IN such a SITUATION
makes the balance incline against ~ own >lde'
and gives the other not less, but more, than lar
equality and thus the weaker side may oe ena-
bled to turn the very TACT OF dependence INTO an
instrument OF power. and In default OF Justice
take an ngenerous advantage OF generosity :
rendering the unjust power. to those VINO make
an unsefish use OF H. torment ana q purdeh
But how l. II when average men are invested
with this power. without reciprocity ana WIN
ont responsibility Give such man The idea that
he Is first IN law and IN opnon-that to VIII IS
his part and hers to SUBMIT Is absurd 10 sup
pose that this idea merely ghdes over his mind,
without sinking into II, or having any eject on
his feelings and practice The propensity to
make himself the first object Of consideration
and others at most the second. Is not 80 rare a.
TO be wanting where everything seems purpoSeiy
arranged for permitting Its indulgence II mere
is any sell-will III the man, ne becomes elther
the conscious or unconscious despot OF has mousse
hold The wife. indeed, often succeeds III gam
ing her objects but il Is bv some of the many Va
rlOus forms OF indlrcctncss and management.
Thus the position is corrupting equally 10 both
IN the one II produces the wees of power, IN the
other those Of artifice Women. IN their present
uhyslcal and moral state. having stronger m
puises, would naturally be tranker and more dl-
rect than men, vet all the old saws and tradl-
tons represent them as artlul and descending.
Why Because their only way to their objects
is by indirect paths In al countries whore wo-
men have strong wishes and active minds. tins
consequence Is inevitable and II II u. less CON
splcuous in England than IN some other places,
If Is because English women. saving occasional
exceptions. have ceased to have either strong
wishes or active minds.
We are not now speaking OF cases IN winch
there is anything deserving the name OF strong
affection on both sides. That, where 1t eXlsls,
Is too powerful principle not To modify greatly
the bad influences Of the situation: II sci
dom. however. DESTROYS them entirely. Much
ofener the bad influences are TOO strong
for the affection. and destroy 1t. The highest
order of durable and happy attachments would
be a hundred times more frequent than they are
il The afCCuOn winch the Two sexes -vush' from
one another were that genuine irlendshir, Whlch
only exists between equals III privileges a IA
facutics But with regard to what Is commonly
called affection in married llic-the habliual ana
almost mechanical feeling Oi kindness, ana
pleasure III each others society. which generally
grows up between persons Who constantly I'VE
together. unless there l. actual dlsllke-'hcft l.
nothing N this to contradict or qualify the mis-
feelings often exist between a sultan and his
lavorltcs. between master and Ia, ser' ants 4.
they are merely examples OF the pllabiilty oi h1-
man nature. which accommodates iGscii IN some
degree even 10 the worst circumstances, ana the
conmones. natures always the most easily.
With respect to the influence personally eN-
erclSed by women over men, 1t, 10 DOUBT 'TehdtlS
them less harsh and brutal N ruder times II
was often the only soitening influence to which
D L., 40, g-fl
wife's influence renders the man les selfish, con-
tains a. things now are. fully aS much error as
truth. SelfishuCss toward the wife herse T. ami
toward those n whom she Is Interested, the
children, though favored by their dependence,
the Wiies influence. no doubt, tends 10 counter
act But the general effect on HIM Other chdrac-
ter, SO long a. her interests are concentrated III
the family. tends but to substitute Tor uruNlduai
seliishno>S family selhshness. wearing an anna
Die gulse, and putting on The mask OF duty How
rarely 5 the wles influence on the side OF public
virtue how rarely does II do otherwise than DIS
courage any effort OF principle 10y Wmch me pr
waite interests on worldly vaniles OF the ia!Hlly
can be expected 10 suffer. Pubic spirit, SENSE
of duty toward The public good, Is OF all virtues
as women arc now educated and situated, me
most rarely 10 be found among them, they nave
seldom even, what IN men Is often a partial SUD
slltute Tor public spirit sense of personal hOnor
connected with any public duty. Many man,
whom no money or personal flattery would have
bought, has battered his political opinions against
a title or invitations Tor his VIE anu SIN
greater number are made mere hunters alter the
puerle vanites of society. because Their wives
value them. ~ for opinions IN Catholic coun-
tines, the wife's influence l. another name Tor
that Of the priest he gives her. III the hopes and
emotions connected with q future life. consola-
ton for the >utierngs and dlsappomtment> whic1
are her ordinary lot IA this. Elsewhere, her
weight j. thrown into the scale either OF the
most commonplace. or OF the most oulwardiy
prosperous opinions either those ~ which cen
sure will be escaped OF by which worldly al
yancement Is hhee>t TO 5e procured Ia hns-
land, the wle's influence Is usually on the ilhbe-
raj and anti popular side this Is generally the
gaming side Tor personal interest and vanity and
~ Laf 80 hnI lie llemncracN on hneralI.n m