The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-12-25

foot and a half, or two feet back
"Consarn my skin il yeon dom: look like
acouple of lost Turks! Du tell me, Betsy,
| 'Melia, where on earth did you get such rig.
gins out. May be catasplasm' d in several
places if ever saw the like since Deacon
Miller's cousin, Ike Barebones, iold me the
world was comin'to an end when il didn't
"Why, now III tell you, Mr. Dowkinth,
we're thenthible femaleth, as you ought 10
know, "said Mrs. Rhuty Tute, with an afTec-
taion and earnestness that caused her friend
10 look down at her plump feet (squeezed
into small shoes, ia astonishmeni "And
as Jonah OF Arch said when sheswas crow
ned Queen of Thpain, women OF mind have
right 10 expreth themselves
f'Consarn your women Of mind !n inter-
rupted Jedediah.
"IIear me out, Mr.. Dowkinth !. l'a not Of
len speak, and when do, want to be
heard n continued the lady.
"Now look a-hear again, Mrs. Rhuty Boot
-
"Rhuty Tute, il you please.n
"Weil, Rhuty Toot, or Rhuty Brute, or
any thing yeou like--thais a darn wilful
misake--yeour tongue runs faster than a
squirrel up sycamore, or bullet eout of a
rife. Hold me under pump, and seuce
me a-drippln', if | wouldn't cut my throat
with billed carrot, and die an orphan, if my
tongue waggled like yourn, by Jehup
"Mr. Dowkinth !" screamed Mrs. Rhuty
Tute, growing very red in the face, and
seeming somewhat strange and uncomforta-
BILE in the costume, "Mr Dowkinth, do you
mean TO expeach my integrity ?'
~ don't care toad's blessing what
peach or apple Shut | mean your tongue
runs wus than aunt Sally Struggles, and hers
runs SO bad they had to put mustard plas.
ter on her neck 10 draw the words ',other
wayn
"Jediah, Jedah, you're bebavin' rude TO
company chimed in Mrs. Doughkins, foun-
cling about with an awkward gait.
"Yeou go and take off them Turkey things
and not make goose of yourseTP replied
Jed, jerking his Jack of Diamonds waist
coat, and adjusting his BEAVER. eff Deacon
Dunklehead, or any of his daughters, were
10 come in meow, they'd think yeou'd gone
stark mad, so they wonld."
81 tell you agin, Teddy, Pm Bloomer ]"
said Mrs. Doughkins.
"You're SQUAD, more like-why yeou
look like a couple ofsereesel ;njuns cn a
spree-half men and hall women--go and
lake 'em off !o
"We won't do il, Mrs. Dawkins; we won't
just for impereucep p said Mrs Rhuiy Tute.
"Will we, dear?'
"No, / guess we won't we want TO be
Boomers conceded Mrs. Doughkins.
"Yeou won't, won't yeou 2" beloved
Jed, throwing his hat down with flourish.
''Yeou say you won't ?"
Mrs. Rhuiy Tute nodded with spiteful
leer
"Well, now want it understood, Mrs.
Jedediah Doughkins, it's not often get my
Ebenezer ri z, but may be made into hard
cider and drank at 'lec:ion day if yeou don't
go and take off them vulgar-lookin' half
trowsers; and that scimpy lookin' frock. I'll
60 right off and dress myself in petticoats,
and rifle streddle into Town on the grey
mare.n
Mrs. Doughkins screamed.
sI iell yeou I'll do IL" continued Jede.
diah, s'Neow, you'd better take 'em off.
viii yeou take 'em of-speak quick, or I'll
have The grey mare saddled in less than a
flash OF CREASED lghmin'."
Mrs. Doughkins was alarmed, and looked
al Mrs. Rhuty Tute, who seemed somewhat
taken aback by this strange menace.
"No, she won't p exclaimed the latter la
| dy.
"Yes, yes-i-i- Mrs. Doughkins
was about 10 say she would, but her friend
gave her such thrilling look, that she did
not finish the sentence.
/ every we'll Hey, Peieg, saddle up the
mare !" hooped Jedediah. "Neow, Betsy
'Melia, where's your blue geoSn and the
Sunday fan iii iurn all the drawers inside
out, wus than young earhquake;";a ";and sci.
zing The hoe he made rush for the stairs,
and after him flew the "Bloomers,n as fast
\ - 1916