Lynchburg Virginian. [volume] (Lynchburg [Va.]) 1829-185?, 1851-03-24
[PROPRIETORS.
Rowan nnd thc yyitch.

/
hoese but a shoulder Of mutton, Which
Rowan ordered to be roasted. Presently
the master ola neighboring hunt, with two
brother Nimrods, rushed into an adj ing
room, and swearing they werchalt starved,
clamorously demanded what they could
have for dinner.
The landlord, with many apologies, told
them he had nothing but bread and cheese
to offer them.
Il am extremely sorry, gentlemen"
said the landlord, much embarrassed, '.b,,l
-" t.e
"How dye mean, sirl" interrupted the
master Of the hunt, impcriously. "by l-ll!
| don't understand this, Gwilliam! Moth
ing but bread and cheese to offer us!--
Why, smell something roasting in your
kitchen at this very moment, SIR"
They all swore they smelt it.
"Why, that's very true, genlcmcn,"
said the landlord, still more embarrassed,
''there certainly is shoulder ofmutton on
the fire, and wish with all my heart
could let your honors have it. but uniortu.
natcly, it is bespoke by an Irish gentleman
in the next room, and -"
"A WHAT An Irish gentleman did you
say, Gwilliaml" roarcd out the master with
IA contemptuous snccr.
YES sir, and -"
Here the landlord was interrupted by q
perfect 'mouth-quake Of laughter, in which
the whole trio joined,
"Pray, what's this Irish gentleman like"
demanded the squire, as soon as he could
speak; "has he been long caught Has he
lost his tail yeti Oh, for heaven sake, do
tell us! has he lost his tail yet, Gwillu,m!"
"Aye, has he lost his tailyct Gwilliaml"
echoed the others, and again they all laugh
ed most outragcously.
"Indeed, gentlemen" began the pcrplcx-
ed landlord.
mo more of this" said the squire, cut
ting him short, "unless You mean to make
us sick, sir. Go, send the mutton in to us,
and let this Irish gentleman have wclcb
rabbit. And, dye hcarl' continued he,
pulling out fine old family repeater, and
putting it into the landlords hand, stake
this in to him, with my compliments, and
ask him if he can tell what time of day it
is by it. Go-go, sir! do as command
you, or it shall be the worse for you,
promise youl"
The landlord, who burst not disobcy,
after many apologies. delivered the watch
with the message. to Rowan who hDd oyer
heard every word that had passed.
Perhaps the squire could not have Sc
lectcd worse subject for this gratuitous
insult than Hamilton Rowan, who scizing
one Of his travelling pistols which lay in
the window, Immediately joined the trio,
who We're enjoying themselves and laugh
ing heartily at the Joke.
"Gentlemcn," said Rowan, with great
suavity, 81 am sorry to interrupt your
mirth. l delight in joke myself, cspcci-
ally whenit's good one. But the fact is,
our landlord here, who must be either
drunk or dreaming. or both, has just
brought message which he aflirms he
was ordered to deliver to me by some gen
tlcman in this room. Now, though / can
not Tor an instant suppose any person pre-
sent" continued Rowan, fixing his eyes on
the squire, "guilty Of so blackguard an act,
must request, as IA mere matter of form
to know whether any gentleman here did
send me this watch with any such message
I'll thank you for an immediate answer,
gentlemen" added Rowan, examining the
printing Of his pistol, "for there is a deli
cious little shoulder of Welsh mutton, Just
roasted, that I'm anxious to pay my res
poets TO-"
Pcrceiving them all dumfounded, Rowan
demanded of each in succession whether lie
was the owner of the watch.
They all replied in the negative
"Most extraordinary!' said Rowan; then
calling to the landlord, he asked him if the
watch belonged to him.
"To me, sir! No, SRI" replied the man,
IN great astonishment.
"Do you know any person, then, out Of
tins room, to whom the watch belongs?"
demanded the impcrturbable Rowan.
"Out of this room, srP'
"Ay, out of this room, sir! Have the
goodnessto look this way, and speak, with
out hesitation, to the point, sir!'
"No, sir; certainly, sir | don't know any
person outof this room to whom that watch
/ belongs" replied the landlord.
\ "very well, sir; now 90 and serve the
mutton up! Well, upon my honor, now
that is mighty comical," continued Rowan,
as soon as the landlord had left the room;
"heresa IA watch which belongs 10 nobody
IN the room and nobody out of the room;
not even TO the person from whose hands
received it. Well, | must keep it, sup
pose, until a claimant starts up, I've no 9th
er course to pursue. In case you should
hear OF any suchperson, gentlemen, there s
my card Throwing II on the tablc). Upon
my word, mighty handsome watch--a
repeater, too! Let me see--ay, jusa four
teen minutes forty-fve seconds past five
4 the very time to attack a shoulder Of Welsh
mutton-ha! ha! Good morning, gentle
men, good morning, You see / know
what time Of day it isl" and with this,
Rowan left them.
| "The watch" saith my informant, "s,ill
remains in possession of the Rowan family"
eSs---
| The following was left at our office; we
give it place.
WANTS SITUATIoN.-To do almost
any thing, young man about thirty years
Of age who has travelled some and seen the
elephant, though he has never been to Cal
ifornia. He wishes TO obtain steady en-
ployment in some legitimate business; he
has verified, in his own experience, the
truth of the proverb, that "a rolling one
gathers no moss" having been clerk in a
retail and wholesale crockcry store, sold
ginger cakes on commission, worked on
farm, tended bar, kept books, sold cabbagcs,
dug clans, raked oysters, edited three
newspapers, lcctured on mcsmerism, prac-
/ tced law and medicine, taught singing
school, groomqd stallion, preached occa-
lily, taught high school, been on the