The star of the north. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1849-1866, 1851-04-10

ful to mankind, were already made in fine
that the intellect of the present generation
would, in all probability use up all the ma
terial which nature has provided for it tc
feed upon; and scientific truths would be
rolled up like an old blanket, marked "de
monstrated" and filed away for the inspee
tion Of fools that might follow after.
While. listentening to this harangue, the
walls around me began to expand wider and
the ceiling above raised to an enormous
height, while through open doors or passages
| saw room after room groaning with thous.
ands of models, until it appeared as though
were in a wilderness of miniature ma.
chinsry. Very soon very pert little gentle
man, with a quick black eye, and pussy
body array ed in the queerest costume ever
saw, came bustlng up to me, and asked me
for my tickets, involuntariIy thrust my hand
into the depth OF my breeches pocket, and
pulling out card, delivered it to him. After
looking at the card and then at me, and ,hen
at the card again, he burst out into loud
guffaw, that made the old Patent Office
ring. "Why sir" said he, "this is no
ticket 1t is the business card of one John
Smith advertising a patent dog churn of
which he here says he is the real inventor,
and it bears da:e in the year 1s5O-nearly
two hunded years ago! The chum may be
found in the room marked Inventions Of
1850" but the man John Smith we hav'nt
got. don't much think he is round above
ground just at this time, " said the little man,
chuckling.s
"But" said I, who are you, if I am not
John Smith" Were you not appointed by
Fillmore, Secretary OF the Interior and did l
not put word in his ear favorable 10 you"
Fillmore Secretary of the Interior !"
exclaimed he; appointed by Fillmore !
why my dear sir was appointed only two
years ago-not two hundred Chief of the
Great Central Department. as the office is
now called"
While we were talking. Franklin, Adams,
jefferson and Fulton, walked in and took
seats, knew Uncle Ben the moment / cast
my eyes upon him. He was dressed in
good old rs style shoe buckles, breeches,
que and double chin,. that tranquil counten-
ance just touched, without being destroyed,
by conedy-were all there. Adams and
jefferson had before seen, and they were
little more modern in dress, but they both
looked care worn. Fulton sat apart, and
eyed the other three as though he had seen
them somewhere, but yet could not call
hem by name.
The rather unexpected arrival of these
gentlemen broke up the comment of my
bustling inlerogater, and one of those pauses
occurred which frequently do, upon the ap.
pearance of strangers. Uncle Ben asked
jefferson Il he would not like to move up TO
the fire AMI warm his feet? "FireW SAID I,
fire ! Why Uncle, there is no fire places
now days, stoves and hot air furnaces are
all the so. The building is warmed by a
great furnace, and two miles of pipe that
connects the heat 10 every room in it," "Not
by long way !"-said my busting friend
4 not by long way, Mr.. John Smith. This
trumpery is all piled away among the inven-
tons OF the years that were. These things
belong TO the age of your dog chum. Why
gentleman" continued he, have you never
heard of the Great Southern Hot Ali Compa-
ny, chartered in 1860, whose business il is
10 furnish warm air from the South to persons
at the North, price 10 families three dollars a
year, all done by gigantic under ground
tunnel, and branches worked at the other
end by an air pump! Have you never
heard of this gentleman! Here we get the
natural heat Of the South, warmed by the
sun none Of sinking coal and wood gasses
TO corrupt and destroy it. And then the
principle Of reciprocity is kept up; for we
send back our cold air in the same and SO
we keep up an equilibrium Of the Union.
Why, gentlemen, those stoves require con-
slant care. AS often as every week it was
necessary TO replenish them with wood or
coal. No!-no those Improvements be.
long to the dark ages"
Bless me !" exclaimed Uncle Ben. elm
pOoSibtci iOpCotCu fuitoh' Anu oo 1ou
don't use the old franklin stove any more!"
said Urcle Ben. Perhaps he continued a
quiet smile playing over his face, as # he
had intended -comical shot, "perhaps you
don't Use lightning now a-days either, and
my lightning rods of course belong 10 the
dark ages toow
"We have the lightning, and use it to o,
but only one rod, built by the State, near its
centre, which is SO colossal and powerful
that it protects every thing around it" And
then the little fellow raltled on about the use
of lightning; how it wrote all over the world
the English language, until 1 verify believe
that Uncle Ben, Fulton, and all set him
down as the most unscrupulous liar that they
had ever me,h with, &c think" said Uncle
Ben, "that if could go to Boston l could
convince myself of the truth of your asser.
lions, but as my time is very limited, can
not"
Send you there in five minutes BY the
watch p answered the little man, cor il
that's too soon IN twenty-four hours. It re-
quires powerful lungs 10 60 by balloon
time five minutes, departure every half hour
The magnetic railway train will take you
! through in four hours" "Whatw said