The Evansville daily journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ia. [i.e. Ind.]) 1848-1862, 1851-04-19
what cum be the matter!..Pll call upon
the Doctor.

A wealthy manufacturer from the west Of
Scotland, while ut Edinburgh on business,
called upon DR.. Gregory for his advice. He
was man of middle statue, rather o 2ulent,
with rosy complexion, and wi e exterior
altogether spoke the comfortable xeer. Al
ter seating himself, the following dialogue
ensued:
q ,GentIeman--WeIi, DR.. Gregory, l ha'
come up to Ednbro' in the way o business,
and lust thought would take your advice
about my health. @
y Doctor--Your health, sir2 What's the
matter with you?
Gent.-lm not just sac weel the stom-
ach as ia like to be.
Dr.-The stomach! suppose your are
a drunkard or glutton, then, sir.
Gent.-Na, ia, DR.. Gregory, we Gamma sd
that, we Gamma SD that; ye maun ken that
Pm sober mon and u temperate mon, and
deacon OF the kirk, as ny worthy father was
afore me.
Dr.-Let us see. What do you eat and
drink What do you take Tor your break
fast 2
Gent take coffee or tea, WI toast, and
fresh egg or a biz o. salmon, though have
la much appetite for breakfast.
Dr.-Yes; and then you take something
by way Of lunch between breakfast and dim
ner?
Cent Gamma say l care over much
about the lunch, but can take bit o. bread
and cheese, and glass Of ale, f it be there,
but Gamma say care over much about it.
Orwell, what do you eat for dinner?
Gent.-O, Pan not very particular, tho l
maun say like my dinner.
Dr. suppose you take soup first2
| 4 lint ilya "
soup.
whit.
Gent.-Yes, like glass O. something
with the soup.
Dr.-And then you have fish or beef and
mutton with vegetables! And glass of ale
or porter with them?
/ GeDt.-Yes. take glass o. ale now and
Them WI my meat.
i Dr.-And ,hen you have boiled fowl AM
+ bacon, or something of that sort. 1 suppose
Cent maun say like bit o. fowl anC
bacon now and then.
Dr--And glass of something with them
Gent.-Yes.
Dr.-And after the fowl you have pud
ding?
Gent Pm ma fond Of pudding. but cal
tlke Bit if it be there.
Dr.-And you must drink with the pud
ding?
, Cent Gamma take over much o. tn,
r wine but if ha' friend VII me, | take
glass or so.
Dr.-And then you have cheese or nurs2
Gent.-Yes; the guide wife is over fond O
them; but Gamma say care much abou
them.
Dr-But you take a glass of wine or tw
with your nuts2
Gent.-Yes; glass or two.
: Dr.-Well, you do not finish your Dime
without whisky punch2
Gent find my dinner sets better on m
stomach with little punch, SO take a glas
j or so.
: Dr.-And you have tea, suppose
: Gent.-Yes, | maun take my tea wi tn
guide wife.
Dr.-And glass Of something whit?
Gent.-Yes, | can take bit o. someihin
n if it be / here.
Dr.-But you do not go to bed withou
: your suppera
Gent.-Na, ma, Gregory, Gamma say | Xix
e TO gang to bed without my wee bit o. supper
y Dr.--And what do you eat for supper
r Gent.-O, "a bit o. any thing, Bit o. salmon
y or boiled tongue or cold fowl.
+ Dr.-And glass OF something with it.
n Gent.-Yes.
Dr.-And can you 60 to bed without
night cap ofhot puuch2
Cent? maun say / sleep better for
L. glass O. hot punch, though Gamma say II
k over fond a the habit.
n Dr.-WeIl, sir, you're fine fellow ! 70
O come to me with IA lie in your mouth, an
tell me you are sober man, and Tempe
j ate man. and deacon Of the kirk, as you
n worthy father was before you and you MAX
yourself out, by your own statement, to. be
glutton, and u wine bibber, and whIsk
lippler, and beer swiler, and u drinker
J, that most abominable OF all composition
ID called punch. Go home, sir, and relor
r. yourself, and become temperate IN your ea
II Ing and drinking, and you will have 10 nee
OF MY advice.
MORE CHARLATANIsM-A H Explained.