The Arkansas banner., 1850-01-08
ng TIFk ' IiERoic AoK.'I

1 THE MESSAGE.
 sF TiiE nERoIc AeE.''
 (cescLuDED.)
 Navy
 The naval afEhirs of the repuhiic, like all cthe affairs. well nurssd have gradually increased nD,I lhsy have become pretty much all the afEaiSh V. have got on tho seaboaFd. Upon examining tn, psvsunn and the material and the eskevial of th, assy--fcr they 60 by wind and aisans, as we'll a, hy water--we fad much to ceasure Oar officer, arc freeasAsly found "rnnalng dowh she trades ? = . matter which is calculated to Iniure the com. nerclai world if longer suffered also .. beating tc quarters, as though our men would not fiehf with. oat being beaten to their guns besides, they are constantly .missing stays' and closing bonnets of ofthelr jibs" Why they have these articles on board. we know not for nc female is permitted to go io sen In vesseI-of-war without written pcr- mission from this department, and no such bernie. sion has been given since the advent of tho sHeroc Age.'
 We find. also, that holy stones arc common artI. cles on board all vessels-ol-war Whether they arc used In stonlng the cuiprits who are guilty of .ly Ing to" and other offences under the Lsvitical atv or are snperstiious recs such the blaFney stone Of Kilkenny, the tlack stone at Mecca the Rosetta stone of EgpPt, the royal stone of Sehone, or the blue stone of medicine. we have not Set been BbIe to ascertain; but no matter what they are or what they are for. have ordered the confounded things ta be thrown overboayd relics of barbaroas ages, which science, when she desires to complete her cabinet, will readily find by dredging ,ha A.sn.lc We agree with tho Irish philosopher that . thiuV cannot be lost when you know where 1t is.
 Then, again, our ships often half seas over, and frequently stagger under studding sails. which k setting very bad example to the temperance na. vies of the world The practice of permitting the Parsur to keep "bui' on ship board, when the frst lieutenant even is not permitted to have cat excepting q cat of nine tails, Is matter worthy of consideration. !" Dead horses'' are frequently ear red to sea, and worked out cruise by all hands and as they are nuisance of ancient ofigin we cannot throw the things overheard bad as they must be. without special act of Congress. We are glad 10 learn, however, that the are always ready 10 work, after the most severe exeriions In saving even the ship from destruction. We never heard yet of their refusing to spliee the main brace" at midnight and in gale of wind. By the way, that brace must be terrible rotten thing, for tt wants splicing sometimes twice n day In the horse latti tndes. which, we presume, ought to be spet h-oa r-s-e latitudes, the winds there having very bad colds accompanying them Many diseases are also found connected with the navy such as ex- teBsive issues stoppages eakages, wind shakes aud carbuncles, They have also many idlers on board, and skylarking prevails to great extent. They have many highly improper names for ropes and blocks, which need not be repeated here, but which Congress readily ascertain from the first old salt they catch . cruise on shore, with the weather leach of his foretop-galant sail little lifting.
 Many stores are kept on board each vessel in com mission, when, in our opinien, one geod grocery, properly managed. would answer for all The whole service is lull of British rues and British GUS. toms. They touch their hats to an abstTdct king when they come on deck, thereby wearing out the front part of every hat in the service Naval hats can always be told by the kings mark the front brim. This custom is derogatory to the people of a free republic and, with cObbia9 and paddng, should be read out of the service with short prayers. Sai lors are extravagaut dogs when they can't waste flour enough ia any other way, they pudding the anchor and often indulge in pckled cats aud tarred rope-yarn.
 They have curious way in the service of telling everything to the marines before communicating it to the department; which is serious evil, aud should be Temeded at once.
 The idea of building 6aiancs dyy-docks. or any other dry-docks. is nonseucical one, and should be repudiated by the present enlightened age.- Dancing-masters and circus riders may balance as much as they please but who could dream of bal- ancing 74 on pole :? As 10 dry-docks that are always halftaH of aeater. they are nothing but sb- subam Rsarinanas, they say in tho law school at Aeeomae, and should never be depended upon by a Christian people who go a clamming at high water.
 IL is suggested. that vessel might be saved from foundering at sea by boring holes in her hul, and putting in taps. Thus, when the vessel leans to one dide. and exposes her bottom, the taps the exposed side to be drawn out at the lap of the drum, and the sea that she ships the bulwarks will go down the hatchways aud pass through her like Branderths pills, by daylight. Clapping in the taps then. before she rights, will finish her business on one side in fiy, and leave her when she comes on the other tack sweet aud dry. By repeating the experiment on the other sGe, the whole ship will be as good as new. and no sickness but the dumb sgue and chihlans will be heard of in that craft; to De sure. this would be taking the disadvantage of gale of wind. but we believe that that is ruleabe, II il is done in respectful manner, even on board of a man of-na
 It would require careful hands at the taps though; and Tor that purpose it is respectfully suggested that reformed drunksnds, who have been used to draw ing beer and whiskey in the dark, should alone be enlisted for the captains Of the hold and hollap and the rear ranks of the aiter-guard The captain of the head, owing to his peculiar duties, might be suffered to liquor as much he pleased, provided he didnt go to sleep in the water ways. The pres- ent age is an age of vapor and steam every thing steams it. from the incipient admiral down 10 the anchor boy It is aii puff and paddle, and smoke and fuss, from Mount Desert to the Bahamas. Sa- tan's realm, in broken doses, in a cart on runners shipped in cradle in the shape of a cucumber spill in two, with side wheels presents about the best comparison this department offer of Butler Kings militia navy.
 The only balances that this department takes any interest in balances due from locofoco disburs ing officers to the United States Having assumed the functions of the Fourth Auditor, have fount seven pnrsers who owed three niRepenees piece fo fractions to the United States and six navy agents who charged five cents piece for letter postage ir their accounts against the strict rule of this depart ment. and have dismissed them all defauliers ant put in their places good mes and true, who nevel can cheat from their constitutional want of knowl edge.
 The practice of sailing ships of war on the Sab bath is contrary to inc wishes sf this department sae against the spirit of the age, We therefore have ordered all ships of saundines to furl theii sails, and anchor from sunset pn Saturday to sun rise on Monday aud those of sonndiags have aisC been ordered to furi their sails. and to sink ror pot, with cable bent on io Y, as to go tiIrougt the motions of being still, if sothing else If the, drift away under those crcnmtaDees, will be thc fault and not ours We think that drisd beef woule be capital substitute for the rusty pork and ma