Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1850-07-12
ANECDOTES.

A.MlA,ODO y GSs
A Western editor thus noticesa
little event which transpired in his
family OH the 4th ofJuly last:
Private and confidential. Joy TO
the worldl Sound the hewgag the
event happened on the glorious birth
day of American independence lit
will add new lustre to the fourth of
July in after ages!l 1t is an uncom-
mon noun! singular number!l!l
masculine gender ~ And it shall
be called George. Washington JefIcr-
son Jackson Hancock Tom Benton
Martin Van Buren, Quincy Adams
Benjamin Franklin Fourth o. July
jerks! So it shall.
81 say" said creditor TO an easy
| debtor, 'your note has been running
long time" "Ah!n replied the oth-
er, ''well, as the boy said of The mo-
lasses, Iet her run.'"
A gentleman at Baltimore was
such an n"eterate gambler, that one
night he not only got completely cloan
ed out of all he possessed, but he aciu-
ally lost his way home.
+ MATRIMONIAL AGENcy.-A Com
pany has been formed in Boston,
with a capital of$l5,OOO, called The
n. L. Matrimonial Agency Co"
Gentlemen in.want of wives, and la
dies in wani OF husbands, pay three
dollars and have their names regis
tered. This done, they arc entitled
Tor one year to receive introduction
and other assistance from the Com
pany.
"Whythe deuce is il, !" said young
swell, few days since, "that can't
make this collar SET welll"
because 1t S a STANDING collar"
replied tie person TO whom tlicqu
ton was addressed.
Min fren, have you seen one little
poodle dog, with his tail slit, and his
years cut off short behind, what | did
lose next week, as / was walking up
de rivare, III dat Id steamboati'
Il did not, Monsieur, but expect to
every minute
'Begar, ifhebc drown, Iwillkin
hm SIX several timesmtwo places
PATERNAL CouNsEL.-..Tommv.'
SAID toping father, a little tight, 10
his son,-Tommy, hic--my bow,
mind your daddy, and ever walk in
his -hIc--footsters.' That might
do perhaps replied the juvenile, 81
! wanted to go into the corkscrew ar
1 Virginia fence business The pater-1
nal g,uardianraised his cane, but Tom
my lodged. ~
There is divine out West irving
to persuade girls 10 forego matrimo.
ny. He might as well undertake To
persuade ducks that they coulo end
a substitute for wafer. or rose-mds
that there something better for Their
compk x en- than sunshine. The onIy
convert he has yet made, is Il single
lady, aged sixty.
a cobbler having mended a pair of
/ shoes Tor customer, was CARRYING
them home, when he saw funeral
passing by attended by attended bya
physician, and said to him, so, sir,
see you are CIR y ng your work
home as well as |.
a woman offering 10 sign deed,
| the Judge asked her whether her hus-
band compelled her to signi .Ele
compel mel said the lady, no, nor
twenty like HIM
81 believe tbejury have been moe
ulatcd for stupidity, said d, LAWYER.
THAT may be- said bis opponent.
"but the bar are of opinion that Won
had it in the naturalway.n
a young lady who was rel5,ked
by her mother for kissiiiis hal4' '9ten-
4 ded, justified herself AZ adoling m tic
passage, '.Whatsoevar We wonld
that men should do ditto you, do We
even scunto ihenl
4 USEFUL Doc. II say. straneor,
said cottage archm to5a Yankee
Ipedlar, don Z you. whistle tl1at ere
dog away
Why, he amt no use no how, he's
| too ugly
.0,but he saves heaps Of work
4 sIIowl'