The New York herald., 1850-12-07

Our Own CRY ITKM.-Several journals make
much ado about certain nondescript paragraphs on
the weather-which, whether or no, they perpe-
rste daily, and put under the head of city items"
BY these wonderful exhibitions Of fancy pinioned
upon fact, the Journalist faetotum makes kind OF
factory OF his brain, and, in fact gives Fictitious
account Of the atmosphere and its effects. or
course, all the poets are drawn from, since the time
of Homer, and every possible figure of speech is
multiplied to nhnity infinite, to astsnsh those who
have not been acclimated to the tropical uxuriance
Of uopes. Every wild conceit is dragged forward,
without regard to rhyme or reason, and is made to
fall into line, like so many raw recruits forced to
enGst-not single volunteer of the whole phalanx
appearing for the love of the thing. We can ina
gine the clerk of the weather, with large poplar
tree whitfield into pen and lightly tossed over his
ear, patiently waiting to record patch OF fresh
sunlight, jerk q heavens watering pot, or great
cotton crop of clouds, or a thorough shower bath
for mother earth, or hot vapor bath, or any other
common event of the firmament-we can even see
him smiling at the attempts of these paragraphists
to say something novel and refreshing, on theme
as ancient as Adam, and which has reigned
throughout nature since the days of the deluge.
When the sun has drunk the dews, and has been
getting high, of course, reeling of long yarns of
Lighter, in his vocation of painter extraordinary
to the human race in general, has daguerreotyped
any quantity of his patrons-when the clouds have
been getting blue, or the moon has filled horn or
two, or every star has lighted its cigar, or Saturn
blows rDgs, or the Great Bear swings his partner
or the "Dipper" has been turned upside down, or
that Sery locomotive, the Earth, has got the steam
up, and is going it at hot speed these item-mon-
gers are ready to report the revel, and to give a
color TO every proceeding. Summer is made
almost TO die OF consumption, by sliding into the
arms of Autumn, who has hectic on her cheeks;
and, at last, they blown offtogether on Arc
tic expedition, into the regions of old Winter,
whence they melt out again, into the warm, gush-
ing streams of Spring, and are borne back again
to their own natural home. Fantasies of every
possible shape and line are made to signalize all
the minHtes details of these great events, and thus
perfect first of April is made of every day in the
year.
A shorter way of obtaining such result, would
be to put quarto Webster's dictionary inte a saul
sage machine, and thus, at once, to make up a
batch of words, suited to any and every occasion
The entras of these weather fancy-mongers could
be divided into three hundred and twelve parts, by
this process, and vast deal of labor would thus be
saved, by those who 60 the whole hog at present
| in this business. We throw out the suggestion
with all due sincerity, quite confident that the
universe will supply any and all deficiencies Of
| Webster's lexicon, in the shape of everything
trarscendental, incompreheusible, and beyond Ian
| gusge or thought. Thus, then, we conclude our
| item-promising to sin no more, after the fashion
Of our contemporaries.