The miners' express. (Dubuque, Iowa) 1849-1854, 1850-10-09

''the neck there lived some years ago, veal
thy old man, who rcsortcd to curious methods
to live without cost to himself. His house, one
| of the handsomest mansions in the South End,
in its day, stood near the road over which the
gardeners, in times past, used to go to market
with their loads of vegetables, two days Of each
week. Old Gripes would be up before day and
on the lookout for these wagons.
Halo! what have you got there: says the
mser to the countryman.
well, daddy, a little of all sorts potatoes
cabbage, turnips, and so on. Won't you look
at EN-?
At this the old miscr would begin TO tumble
over the Vegetables, pocket potatoe, an onion,
turnip, Or
sAh, yes, they are good enough, but we poor
creatures can't afford to pay such prices as you
ask, no, no, we must wait until they come down.
The mser would sneak into the house with
his stolen vegetables, and the farmer would drive
on. Then back would come the miser and lay
in ambush for another load, and thus, in the
course of few hours, he would raise enough
vegetables to give his household dinner. An
other dodge of this artful dodger, was to take
all the coppcrs he had got, (and Of course, a
poor creature like him handled great many, }
and then 90 abroad among the stores and trade
them off six for sixpencc, get quarter Of dol
lar for them; and thus in getting dollar he
made four per cent by several hours of disgust
ing mean labor.
But one day the old man ran foul of a snag.-
A market man had watched him for sometime
purloining his vegetables, and on the first Of the
year sent in bill of several dollars for turnips,
potatoes, parsncps, &c. The mser Of course
refused to pay the bill, denying ever having had
the goods But the countryman called prOpri-
q perSOng refreshed his memory, and added
that if the bill was not footed at sight he should
prosecute him for stealing! This made the old
miser shake in his boots. He clustered while,
then reasoned the case, then plead poverty &c.
But the purveyor IN vegetables was not the man
to be cabbaged in that way, and the old man
called him into his sitting room, and ordered his
son, wild scamp, to go up stairs and see if he
could find five dollars in any of the drawers or
boxes up there. The young man finally cried
out,
Dad! which bag shall take it out Of, the
gold or silver?'
odd zounds!' bawlcd the old lnan--'thc boy
wants to let out that I've got bags Of gold and
silver
And so he had many thousand dollars in gold
and silver. He hobbled up stairs, got nine half
dollars, and tried to get Off with fifty cents less
than the countryman s bill; but the countryman
was as stubborn mule and would not abatc
a tarthing, SO the old miser had to hobble up
stairs again, though the operation was like
squeezing bears grease out of pi gs tail, or jer
king out eye teeth.
The miser never troubled the markctncn a
gain, and not long after this, he got spurious
dollar put on him in one Of his exchange opera
tons, and that wound up his penny shavings.
Time passed-death called upon the wretch
ed man of ingots and money bags, but while
power remained to forbid it the old mser refus-
ed to have physician. When, to all appear
ances, his senses were gone, his friends drew
the miser's pantaloons from under his pillow,
where he had always insisted on their remaining
during his sleeping hours, and his last illness
but as one Of the attendants slowly removed the
garment, the old man with convusive effort,
a galvanic Like grab, threw out his bony, cold
hand, and seized his old pantaloons!
The miser clutched them with dying grasp
words struggled in his throat, he could not ut
ter them, he was dead
Much curiosity manifested by the friends
and relatives to know what could have caused
the poor old man to cling to his timc-worn pam
falcons; but the mystery soon revealed, for
upon the Innings of the waist-band and watch fob,
over $4,000 in bank notes were found conceal
ed
The Lords pardon and human sympathy be
with all such misguided slaves of money
Yankee Blade