The southern press. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1850-1852, 1850-07-16


against waltzing, (which was very fond of until
my calves contracted,) have induced me to send
you the following:
Defence Of Waltz
Unhappy Waltz! though on thy native shore
Sad : Werter" thought the prodigous bore:
Ending at once his g sorrows" and his life
By blowing his brains out for his neighbours wife
Though Byron's muse was scandalized so much,
Tracing all evil to the WALKERS touch,
And by Don Juan's chaste and classic page
Sought to amend the morals Of the age.
Though Moore's pure mind with holy zeal in
spired,
Pronounced these worthless and no more admired !,
Declaring waltz to be deadly sin
The fatal step that led all others in.
Though pious Sporus in his canting strain,
VI ponderous piety so justly vain,
Swears that to him his feet were only given,
That he might march with them siraghtway to
Heaven
Though Tray and Blanche, and Sweetheart, all
combine
To yelp at Waltz--such task shall not be mine
NO! as thy championship inspired by love,
step into the lsts--here lies my glove.
Poets and Paritans, both great and small,
Recreants and hypocrites! have at We all
10 you, we sages, who so fercey rail,
Applies the fable Of the Fox's tail:
Learn from that fable no more to deride,
That which in person we have never tried
Chained by your heavy heads or heavier feet,
Unwilling victims to your quiet seat
Lest we IN turn the critics trade should ply,
And show the mote that dims your prying eye
Lives there the man so base--so mean of soul
30 lost to honor and to shame's control
30 reft or manhood and all manly thought,
As not to reverence woman as he ought
Converting good into source of evil,
And, without wages, working for the d.?
Ii such there be, let every woman shun
Contact with them as with the evil one 4 rs
But few their number, futile their designs
Againstthe heart where stubbonwhalebone shines.
When the fair damsel trips the lighted hall,
Where mirth and music answer fashions call,
She comes not armed alone in virgin pride,
But stiff IN whalebone, buckram--much beside,
Which well II forlorn bachelor breads revealing,
Lest fairy fingers gently DER him stealmg,'
Should penance dree for daring to rebel
Gainst mystic rites that make the modern BELLE
Beauty when unadorned adorned the most
Is now as stale as yesterday 3 dry toast,
And Venus self with all her charms would fail,
Unless she carried cotton by the bale.
We'll stnflied and padded from the top to toe,
All that is felt and grasped is CONNIE II jaa,
And the little WALTER clasps within his arms
A cotton bale of Unprotected charms. r,#
Upon my soul It's nothing but the truth,
For myself have waltzed in days of youth,
Spurn ID with elastic toe the yielding floor,
And ceasing +" asked" like Oliver g for more -
1et never numbered IN my Hst OF faultS, IA ea..#r
The love cherished for the harmless waltz,
Since maids and matrons Of unblemished fame,
Thought it no sin to mingle in the same.
But now, alas the world so prudish grown,
Insists that damsels ought to stand alone,
And that WHISPERED beau with outstretched arm,
Is like an adder coiled for deadly harm
Avoid him ladies'! fy--Oh--run away,
For if you don't there III be the d. to pay
For dark mansion you'll be booked that night,
That ne 'er is mentioned unto ears polite
''Facilis DIES are,1i census, - saidthe poet,
Those were the steps he meant, and you should
know it.
TITUs PEEP.