Spirit of the age. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1849-1865, 1850-08-30
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PRoVERBIAL PHILosoPHY.-Martin Far
quhar Topper, in his beautiful "Proyer-
bal Philosophy" commences n Of the
chapters with the declaration that
. A babe in the house Isl weH-spring of pleasure.
Ezekiel says that he has seen places
where it might more truly be said,
q babe in the house is fountain of tears"
RATHER Coe1.-" You're a pretty fell
low, said the owner of a wood pile to a
thief, "to come here and steal my wood
while sleep" Eyes," replied the thief,
=" and suppose you would stay up there
and see me break my back lifting, before
you would offer TO com down and help
me-"
DRUNK BY JING.-A constable of Phil
adelphia, in giving testimony before the
Mayor OF that village, was asked how
drunk the prisoner was: He replied that
" he was very drunk SO much so that he
did not know a tavern from an omnibus"
Well, he was truly drunk
SODA WATER REJECTED BY A Sos OF
ERIN.-A glass Of soda water was offered
to an Irishman the other day, who reiec-
ted it with the greatest indignation.-
+" Do you think | am a salamander," said
he, 4" to drink water billing hot p
The IDIoT AND CLERGYMAN.--A coun.
try clergyman, by his dull, monotonous
discourse, set all his congregation to sleep
except an idiot, who sat with open mouth
listening. The parson enraged, and
humping the pulpit. exclaimed" What
all asleep but this poor IDIOT" Yes"
exclaimed the poor boy, " and if | had
not been an idiot would have been asleep,
too" Truly a wise reply.
h-" Always be prepared for DEATH"
said a Missourian elder, as he placed in
his sons belt two bowie knives and a pair
of revolvers.
&~ This is really the smallest horse
ever " sad a coun'ryman on view
ing a Shetland pony. "Indade, now
replied<he Irish companion, but Eve
seen one as small as two Of him."
A Mourn LIKE AN ELEpHANT.-A
good story is related Of Sully, the paint.
er, a man distinguished for refinement oil
manners, as we'll as his success to the fine
arts. At a party one evening, Sully was
speaking of a belle, who was a great favo.
rite. "Ah," says Sully. She has q
mouth like an elephants "Oh, Mr.
Sully, how can you be SO rude ?" Rude
} ladies what do you meani said she
had a mouth like an elephants because
it's full Of ivory"
!. Vs. Mrs. Speckless says that the bes
vegetable pill that has ever been inven
Ted is the apple-dumpling. For destroy
ing a knawing at the stomach, it is is thu
only pill to be relied on. OATS a fact.
@ Why is a newly opened dry goot
store like a house on fire. Because i
3 starts all the Bellies pretty girls,) of thu
city.
G% The celebrated D,. Wendall ha:
iasenled a new pill 10 purge melan
4, choly." They are mad of fun and fresI
, air, in equal proportion, and are to b.
taken with cold water three times a da,
+ without stopping.
e MOTHER WIr.-A stingy HUSBAND
t threw off the blame Of the lawlessness @
his children in company, by saying hi
$ wife always sc gives them their own way.
= Poor things" was her prompt reply
It's all have to give them"
! ! LoGIc.-A gentleman asked a countr
clergyman for the use of his pulpit for
young divine, a relation of his. 81 reall
" do not know" said the clergyman, "hol
to refuse you; but if the young ma
u could preach better than me, my congrega
ton will be dissatisfied with me aftel
!, wards; and if he could preach worse,
y don't think he's fit to preach at aN."
d OvERTAKEN EY DRINK.-A brothe
IL was arranged before the church for be
ing drunk, as the Deacon insisted on say
ing. The brother arose and stated tn;
er he had been so unfortunate as 10
ID " overtaken by strong drink" and W;
going on TO state how sorry he was, ar
all that. Brother Moderator" said II
Deacon, ~ wish the brother would e.
lie plain the case more accurately. He say
~ he was overtaken,' with his peculiar en-
~ phasis what does it mean? Are we
Of understand that the strong drink took a
n ter him. he endeayoring to escape, an
is overlook him, and actually run down b
throat without his consent or appreciation
re IF so, l do think that the brother has bet
ID possessed by an evil spirit, indeed"
lv
IN A PERT REPLY.-A young buck b
en- longing to the independent drink-or-let-
lie alonejust-as-T-pleas e-without-signing t
as pledge fraternity, popped the question
np a pretty girl a short time since, W
ok brought a Still deeper blush TO his alWo
blushing countenance, by replying that
de she had signed a pledge to neither dri
,se or traffic in ardent spirits, she did not ft