Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1850-07-19
The Deacon and his Ram

Once on time, there lived in good old
Connecticut, a certain Deacon of church,
who made great profession Of religion, al
ways attended meeting on the Sabbath DAYS,
never smiled or uttered Jest, or allowed
trilling or vain conversation in his presence;
and who invariably, morning and evening,
repeated his prayers in presence of his fam.
lily: always leaning heavily over the back
OF chair, in one particular corner of the
kitchen, with his face towards the cellar
door, which fastened, as was usual in the
GOOD old times, with Il hook affixed TO
staple in the door, and falling into another
in the door post
Now with his outward piety the deacon
was a hard man aud an eXacting MASTER
lie said that he required only what was
right, but then you know he was his own
Judge ia all matters, and never allowed trial
by jury. His poor wife lived and moved in
deadly fear Of his reprimand, and his chill.
rem never dared to laugh or speak above a
whisper in his presence. With his hired
men he was eXactIng to the last degree, re-
quiring them to toll without any nterms.
sion from sunrise to noon, when he allowed
the man hour to dine and rest, Just an hour
to the minute, and woe to Mrs. Deacon if
the dinner was not on the table precisely at
twelve, as in that case, the men had to
"stand around and wait" From one
"'-I.,,-i, tI.-y wore e,ll4s~.I ,v...I, al TX,
ami il oncl lost anthOur it was deducted from
his wages. OF course his hired men hated
BIN, and embraced every opportunity Of de-.
Graudng and deriding him, and playing lit
tie tricks upon him.
Now the deacon had fine flock of sheep,
and the "patriarch ofthe flock" was bio,
lusly, unloying old fellow, always willing
to try the hardness of his head, with any
and every opponent So the boys" had
taught him to attack any object toward.
which they pointed significantly; and &c
made them selves world of amucmcnt al
his cxpcnce.
Wen, it so happened that the deacon hat
been unusually morose and exactng. one
day; had reprimanned the hired men. Iectur
ed his wife, scolding the girls and given tn,
boys taste Of the raw-hide, and finally as
scmblod the family " to PRAYERS" 1t wa
in "haying time" and so the hour for pray
er. which was eight o'clock, came last a
early twilight.
The deacon had just got earnestly enca
ged, when one of the hired men perceive
the old ram looking nquiringIy in at tn
door, with wonderful, devout, knowin
air. Some evil genius put the mischief int
the mans head and he beckoned the rar
TO him, and just as the deacon was calm
most lcryenliy upon his Master, pointed bin
out to the old beIigerent, as an object ,
attack The brute gave knowing wink
fixed his head with the great curling horn
and rushed on with the impetuosity an
force olhIs namesake, the batterinr ran
struck the STOPPING deacon square in til
rear, driving him violently against the doc
the hook Of which sprang from its stapl,
and down jumped the deacon astrde of h
char, while the ram threw an elegant son
erset and went down after him. There W;
a terrible Gathering down the stairs, wit
the crashing Of the chair, which baok Ike
It's decent, and heavy conclusion Of ma
and beast at the bottom of the cellar.
Then arose the deacon's voice, "Cor
denim you old fellow but you've knocke
one horn off any way.