The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1850-05-21
punchs Police, Avery Melancholy Case


Yesterday a gentleman Of the name OF
/ homas Carlyle was brought before MIR.
Punch, charged with being unable to take
care Of his own literary reputdton---a very
first rate reputation until few months past
but now, in consequence of the reckless
and alarming conduct Of the accused, in n
most dangerous condition indeed, in the c.
pnion Of very competent authorities, fast
sinking.
The office was crowded by many distin>
gushed persons, all Of them manfesting the
most tender anxiety towards the accused ;
who, however, did not seem 10 feel the seri-
ousrcss of his situation but, on the contra
ry, with folded arms and determined express
sion of visage, called the worthy magistrate
(Alr. Punch) wndbag,' n " serf OF funk
cydom," and IAN ape Of the Dead Sea"
John Nokes, policeman with literary
turn proved that he had long known the do
ngs of the accused Witness first became
acquainted with him through his Life OF
Schiller" work done in the very best and
dcccnles, manner, in which no offence what
ever was committed against the peoples Eng
lsh for he, John Noles, had no idea that
English should bc called either kings" or
"qucen's," but empha'ically the peoples
English Had since known the accused
/ through " .Sdrtor Resarius,' The French
I Revolution,"" Past and Present." and Oil
yer Cromwell" From time to time, as lac
went on, witness had marked, with consider
able ahxiety, an increasing wildness, a dar-
ing eccentriciy of manner in the dongs Of
the accused, frequently observing that he de-
lighted to crack and dislocate the joints Of
language, and to melt down and alloy ster-
ling English into nothing better than Ger
man silver. Nevertheless, witness did no,
believe the reputation of the accused in any
positive danger until some three or foui
mouths back, when he detected him running
wildly up and down the pages of Fraser
Magazine pelting all sorts of gibberish al
the heads Of Jamaica niggers- Entastically
reproaching them for being sup TO the ears
content in pumpkins, when they should work
for sugar and spices " for their white masters
threatening them with the whip, and, in a
word, dealing'in language only dear to the
heart-wltncss meant pockets-of Yankee
slave>owncrs and Brazilian planters. Since
then, witness he'd named his suspicious tc
several most respectable publishers, waning
them to have an eye upon the offender.
Peter Williams, teacher At the Lamb-and
Flag Ragged School, deposed that he had
purchased two numbers of a work by the ac.
cused, called Latter-day-p Pamphlets" tn,
first number appeared to HIM (wilness) 10 de
velop rabid symptoms-but in the second
in Model Prisons, there was nothing in i
but barking and froih. (Ilere several pass
ages were read, that fully bore out the opn
ion of the witness passages which created I
melancholy sensation in court many persons
signing deeply, and in more than one instanc,
dropping some natural tears") Wines
did not believe it consistent with public safe
ty that, in his present temper, the accused
should be trusted with pen and ink. If per
mitted the use Of such dangerous weapon
} he woulG-until recovered from his presen
| indisposition- inevitably nilict upon his rep
utalion mischief from which it could no
recover As it was, witness considered it ia
{ from safe
. Mr. Punch asked the accused If he ha
+ anything to say whereupon accused, with
f wiihering smile, replied;
/ Preiernatural Eternal Oceans =" In
b. human IIumanitarians -" Ederdown Phi
$ lanthropy -" Wde-reyerberating Cant
-" Work Sans Holiday -" Three Cheer
y more, and Eternal, lnimitable, aud AntipC
}. dean Fraternity "-"Pumphindom, Flunke,
C dom, Foolscapdom, and Pen-and-Inkdom
G Mr. Punch observed, this was melanchC
Q ly case, lie could not release the accuse
= unless upon good and sufficient surei,