The daily crescent. [volume] ([New Orleans, La.]) 1848-1851, 1850-01-14
[FrUm the PhiladeIphia Saturday Gazette. ]
REV. MRS. SNIFFLES:
Her Sentiments in Regard to the Parsonae

REV. MRS. SNIFFLES:
Her Sentiments in Regard to the Parsonage.
81 say l m dsgusted with this old house L amt
fit for ginteel folks TO live in; looks as if twas
built in Noah's time, with its consarned old gamble
| ruiz and leetle bits o winders pokin' out like
bird cages all round Painted yallef, too, and such
humbly yaller; for all the world jest the color o
calomel and jollup!p
But you are aware, Mrs. Sniffles-',
say I amt fit to live in. l m ashamed on t.
| feel awful mortified about il whenever / look at
Miss Myerses and Miss Loder's, and the rest o
the hausome sittwations in the neighborhood with
their wings and their piazzers and foldn DOORS and
all so dazziin' white. II g ridiculous that we
should have to live in such DISTRESSED lookin old
consarn, when we re every bit and grain as. good
as they be, if not ruther better"
| Nevertheless, the house is very comfortable ~
Comfortable who cares for comfort when GIN
tility Is eOnsarned Idon't- say if you re de-
tarmlned to stay in 1T you d ought to make some
alterations in T. You ought to higher the ruff
up and put on some wings, and build piazzer in
front with four great pillars to I, and knock out
| that are petition betwxt the square room and
kitchen, and put foldin doors instd on and then
build on kitchen behind, and have it all painted
| white, with green winder blinds. That would
| look something like, and then | should MT feel
/ ashamed to have ginteel company come to see me-
| as dew T other day, when Curnel Bns
and his wife caled,-I could pit help noticn how
| SohtelhFlloie Sne looked round at the house and
| furnitur-l actilly was mortified felt as if /
| should sink right through the floor"
| But you know, Mrs, Sniffles-'
81 say we d ought to have new furnitur-sofys
and fashionable cheers, and curtins and nantletry
| ornaments, and so forth That old settee looks like
! a sight And them cheers, tew they must come
| over in the ark. And then there amt pieter in
the house, only jest that everlastin old likeness o
Bonyparte. Il III bet forty great apples it 5 five
hundred years old | was rally ashamed on t when
l see Miss Curnel Billings look at it so scornful
| when. they called here. l s'pose she was coun-
terastn it with their beautiful new picters they re
jest ben gittin' up from New York, all in gilt
frames. seen one on 'em t other day in to Mr..
Bungle's shop, when went in with Sister Tibbins
to look at her portrait that he s paintin seen
one o. Miss Billinses picters there. IT was splen
did one as big as the top o that table, and rep
resented neegant lady iyin' asleep by a river
and ther was little angel hoverin in the air over
| her head jesta gwine 10 Shoot at her with bow
and arrer. axed Mr.. Bunge what I was sent to
his shop for, and he said how I Miss Bllins wa Mt
| quite satisfied with it account O. the angerslegs
bein bare, and she wanted to have him paint some
pantaletts on EN-, and he was gwine to dew il as
soon as he got time. He thought 'twould be
| very interestin' picter when he d got it fixed |
think so tew. ldew admire picters when they amt
all dirty and faded out like old Bony there. Them
Scripter pieces that Sister Myers has got hangin'
IN her front parlor-them she painted afore she
married, strikes me wonderful interestin, espe-
hndin Moses in the bulrushes.. Her parasol and
the artifcals in her bonnt is jest natra lie.
And Moses, he looks cunnin lyn' there asleep,
with his little coral necklace and bracelets on. o.
it s sweet plcter. And like that other one, tew,
that represents Pharoh drivn' full tilt into the
he'd Sea after the lsrchtes. How nat'ral his coat
tails flies out think some Seripter pieces would
be very APPROPRIATE for minister's house. We
! might git Mr. Bungle to paint some for the front
Par1r and our portraits to bang in the back parlo,
> I Il -
the use o my talkin O. havn' picters, or anything
else that decent? You do MT take no interest in
! It. You seem to be perfectly satisfied with this
! fambergasted old house and everything in it"
y My former consort never desired anything su-
! perior to it,
"Your former consort. l m sick and tired O.
hearn' about her. II amt by no means agreeable
to have dead folks throwd in yer face from mornn'
to night. What il she was satisfied with her sitti
i walton. I amt no sign should be. | s'pose
she had MT never ben used to nothn' better, but
, hare"
But, Mrs. Sniffles, you must recollect that
say taint to be put up with. want to have
some company-ben wantn tew ever we was
married but as for invtn any gintee people Wis
ltn to such DISTRESSED old she'll as this is won
dew lt-and so-Miss Billins and Miss Loder and
theM would say was tryin to cut swell, and
couldn't make 1t out. And don't mean to accept
no more invitations amonkst them that lives in style
Tor 1t aggravates me, it does, to think how different
| you make yer PASTORAL
visits without me in future, for I've made up my
mind not to go out none as long we live in this
ridiculous old house"
But recOllect, Mrs. snfles, this house is par
sonage-l occupyit rent-free."
don't care if It's parsonage. say the con-
gregaton might afford you better one, and for my
part, m disposed to make fuss about it,
| Mrs. Snltfies, You must be aware that am not
possessed oil Inexhaustible means have never at
tempted TO conceal from you this fact. Therefore,
m fDlS he Al.
lmposslbJity of my erecting a new residence the
plan which you propose. Nor is it at all probable
that the congregation would be willing to make
such alterations in this as you suggest Yet, as
sure you that have not the slightest objection to
+ your employing your 0lcn means in the construc-
ton Of a more elegant edifce."
i My own means !"
"Yes Mrs. Sniffles. Your dissatisfaction with
the parsonage is great, that have for some time
past been expecting you would propose building a
new residence; and repeat that such an appropri-
alton OF portion of your funds would meet my con-
currence"
my funds %
"Your funds, Mrs. Sniffles. 1t is delicate,sub-
Ject, and one on which have hitherto hesitated to
make inquiry, although possessing undoubted
right to do so, have been expecting ever since our
union, that you would inform me how and where
your property is invested"
My property"
Your property, Mrs. Snifles. In what does it
consist, II may be permitted to inquire ?n
Land O. liberty you know as well as dew"
(" What am to infer from that observation ?"
Jest what you're a mind to. | amt worth
money, and | never said was"
" Mrs. Snitiles, you well aware that on your
arrival in this place, common report pronounced
you to be an individual of abundant means, and
have always labored under this impression-an i'm
preston which, allow to remind you, you your
self confirmed in a conversation which occurred be-
tween us in the parsonage grove.
; You don't mean to say I told you so, and you
darsent say t did"
"A-hem-T mean 10 say that you did not deny ii
when | delicately alluded TO the subject On The
contrary you led me infer that such WIS the fact
and under that impression was induceYto aecede
, to your proposal.
My proposal What do you mean TO insnni.
waite ?"
" | should have said your--your-evident incli-
nation for ra-a--matFmonia engagement. deep.
ly regret Mira SRitiss thai yoa sheuld have allow,