The Middlebury register. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1850-1882, 1850-03-12
Love. Friehdshin. and Marriage.

year of your birth. Send me this in
formation once again. ] always con
slider it matter of Importance to know
accurately the age Of those L like, es-
pecitlly when they are female friends.
| entertain peculiar opinions upon this
subject, and prefer women of more adj
vanced years 10 the more youthful; ; even
external charms, in my opinion, contin>
ue to exist mnch longer than is generally
allowed to be the case; and those men
tai qualities which particularly delight
us are decidedly heightened by years.
| never desired at any period Of my life
to hold near position either to a girl
or woman much younger than myself !;
least Of all could have married under
such circumstances. | am convinced
that such marriages are not usually pro-
duclye of happiness they generally
lead the man to treat his wife as a child !;
and whenever there exists much discrep-
ancy in point of age, it is impossible that
that freedom of intercourse should take
place which tends to the mental cleva-
trun and happiness Of both parties, or
that that pure stream of thought and
sentiment should flow between them
which peculiarly constitutes all that is
blissfnl in the intercourse betwixt the
two sexes. Equality of mind is indls-
pensably necessary in the married state ;
and the man can only expect TO find
happiness in this condition when the
wife, as far as the powers will permit,
and yet with the full independence OF
womanhood, yields to his opinions and
recognises his will as her own. But |
have departed from the subject of your
narrative. 1t was very peculiar, but,
in the innocence Of progressing mind
not yet unlDlded to itself, a very natural
and pralseworlhy state of heart, which
led you most ardently TO desire to pos
scss a friend, to the exclusion of every
other wish. In this we recognize clear-
ly the difference between love and friend
ship; both equally consist Of that life
Of the soul, under the influence Of which
two persons meeting each other, and APP
pearlng individually to give up their ex>
lstence the one to the other, yet receive c
it back again in brighter aud purer
form. A man must possess some ex-
ternal object TO which he can attach
himself, upon which he may work with
all Tie collected powers of his existence.
But although this inclination is'common
to all, yet it is the privilege Of the scnsi-
tive and highly cultivated soul alone, to
feel the desire, the aspiration after true
friendship and true love. Minds less
delicatel constituted, or blunicd by the
world, form but transitorv and changing
attachments; they never attain to the
tranquility which results from a perfect
exchange of sympathy.
Viewed in reference TO each other,
love and friendship, under every form
and circumstance, differ in this respect,
that the former is always colored with
sensuality: but this does not initiate a.
galnst lis excellence, for even sensual
inclination may comprehend within IL
sell the greatest purity. Love originates
in the very soul, and changes the nature
of all things subjected to its ui5potted
brightness. In young girls who have
never once recognised the emotion oi
love, much less arrived at the conscious
ness of its existence in themselves,
this emotion lies yeiled under the
guisc Of friendship; these two feelings
are not yet clearly and definitely scpa>
rated; but as womanhood approaches,
every emotion passes insensbly into that
of love. Even friendship, as il existed
between two persons of the same sex, is
at this period Of life more energetic,
more passionate, more yielding and sac
ridcing and although at more ad-
vanced age friendship may lead US 10
perform the same actions, vet at an ear
ly stage of life it manlesls itself differs
emily the tone Of the emotion is more
glowing, the soul is more thoroughly
penetrated, and it shines through ii with
n clearer and warmer light Uumboldf S
Lctters't0 a Female Iricnd