Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1850-09-18
AN ANCIENT TERRIER.

voe dire will be likely to puzzle him, if he be not aware
that urai dire is the original term; and there many eX-
pressons used by gentlemen of the long obe that will not
bear an outdoor construcon-witness the pedcamen in
which delinquent uryman placed the occasion of
his presenting an excuse for nonattendanee:
"Accordngy the morning appeared in court, arm
ed with my physicians certificate and two days beard,
by way of what lawyers call cumulative testimony of i'll
ness But it all thrown away the court was engaged
in an important jury trial. action for respass,
keeper kindly informed me- which would probably last all
the day. listened for few moments to the defendants
counsel at-headed man, who at the time of my entrance
proceeding in drowsy tone Of voice to show what is
technically termed a right of way' but hearing nothing
from him that especially interested me- began retrace
my steps, and had just reached the door, when heard him
say with considerable emphasis that he intended produce
in evidence ancient terrier Had my deceived
me No: could not have been mistaken the words
pitched on the speakers highest key much as to
wakeO for instant the senior Judge, who had up to that
moment been indugng in uiet sumber leaving the du
ty Of taking notes 10 his associate the right, who
reading the morning paper But my doubts, if had any,
dspeed by the sudden interruption of the plain
ts counsel, who jumped up very much after the
declamed for hour against the introduction Of fan ancient
terrierp Yes, those his words, and mistake
How went, heart and SOUL for The defendant! How
feared lest his extraordinary testimony might be ruled OUT
How eproached myself for having mentally set him down
for an old poser before had heard him utter those magic
words and when he replied, which he did successfully,
how hung upon his accents and caught myself say
ing almost aloud singed cat' And yet sensation
ed created by this novel and startling debate
The lawyers all looked without berayng any signs of
wondemen the old Judge had subsidized into blessed forget
uness which he appeared 10 take in broken dozes the
socae engaged in cutting advertisement from the
newspaper the clerk had peaed apple, and sharing
it with The crier in fact, all things seemed to ev
cry day appearance, as though nothing uncommon were
happening about TO happen and yet here in the nine
eenth century,n enlightened community, was the ques
on agitang to whether brute-a quadrupad-no mat
how sagacous should be admitted to counerbalance,
for augh court or bar might know the evidence Of al
derman
'Preseny the old Judge mumbed out the decision of
the court, of which the only words that could distinctly
hear were Plaintiffs cothes rents,' and let them produce
the ancient terriern
s'But these few words seemed to throw some light on
the subject. My mind had been deadfuy exercised in
striving divine how dog, young old, could prove
right of way SLOW could this dumb testimony avail ?rea
soned but when heard the Judge talking about the ami
NAL in connection with the plaintiffs clothes and rents my
imagination already the stretch was not slow in conur-
ing up the phantom of plaintiff with torn panaoons fly
ing from the aged canine protector of the defendants pre-
misses. Yes that must be the point. Fresh to my reco-
lection came Bevis the noble houndof the Scottish knight
who hoted Leopold of Austria the bastard nsuter of
the English standard the dog of Moniags barked across
my memory long dormant anecdotes of the sagacous quad
ruped were awakened and began arrange themselves in
my mind, now prepared to witness what before had only
seen in print.
"Whe all this was revolving within me- the trial SEEM
ed be progressing in the old way again. the judges had
resumed their former occupations of sleeping and reading
the clerk was peeing another APPLE in which the crer
seemed to take quite much interest as was decorous in an
officer of the court every thing had assumed the same ap
pearance with the exception that the witness stand
was occupied by Short puy-lookng man, very red very
much frightened with very musy roll of parchment doc
his hands. Many and deary were the questions
put to him. and oft and dreary did he turn over the mou
dylookng records and make response. began to grow
nervous There seemed be end 10 it. looked at my
watch and found that my dinner hour had long since pass
ed. Night was coming on what would they think at
home? What would my wife say? When left her in
the morning, by way of practising fer my lying apology to
the court complained to her Of feeling unwel she told
me looked so; that long BEARD which had suffered to
grow for the purpose Of mysying the Judges came up in
Judgment against me- She just the woman to send
belman And now really began 10 feel i'll. had once
been seized with determination of blood TO the head and
the excitement under which had been abong for helas
five hours produced symptoms which thought Indicated
another attack the old judge he nodded, began look
like magnifed mandarin the clerk was peeling pump
kin the witness sweed and the jury appeared packed
could stand it no longer; in undeo1e addressed
quiet, hooking person who sat next to me:
"'When will they bring in that dog 2 said l.
"Tha rhat q replied the man, with much surprise
as could be thrown into whisper.
""That dog, reiterated; 'the teuer-!he ancient ter
rier that they quarreed about SO long,
"The rush blood that had been hanging about SEEM
ed all at once be paying the stranger vslt his lace at
first grew ed and then purple; his cheeks dsended his
eyes waered and his whole frame shook it nearly
minute before he recovered from the paoxysm sufficiently
to say me, something between sob and hiccough'
The parchment roll in the hand of the witness is what
is called in law an ancient terrier
81 could not have had my about me, for ecoect
distinctly Of having made such loud Of bad word as to
make the walls echo; The old gentleman the bench star
ted from his sleep; the newspaper dropped; SO did the
clerks apple and the crier's coun'enance.
"How reached my own house has always Seen mys-
ery to me but that night had one continuous dream OF
trying to climb genealogical tree to get out of the way OF
Pope's built"
Music IN MAN.-The universal disposition ofhuman
beings from the cradle the deahbed to express their
feelings in measured cadences ofsound and aclon proves
that our bodies are constructed musical principles and
that the harmonious working Of the machinery depends on