Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, IA [i.e. Ind.]) 1839-1854, 1849-05-23
A Judgment for Costs.

Old Captain Slick was a remarkable
precise gentleman. and a concisely just
man. He was. too verv rnethodlcal in
his habits. one of which was to keep an
account in writing Of the conduct Of SER
wants 1t was sort of an account cur
rent. and he settled it every Saturday af-
ternoon. No one dreaded this hebdoma-
Diary balancing. more than Tony. the boy
of all work; for the Captain was general
" obliged to write receipt Of considera-
bic amount across his shoulders.
One settling afternoon, the Captain ac-
conpanied by Tony. was seen 'toddling'
down to the old stable, with a little ac-
count book in one hand, and a small rope
in the other. After they had reached the
bar Of JUSTICE and Tony had been prop
erly strung up the Captain proceeded to
state his account as follows:
Tony Dr.
Sabbath, To not half backing my
boots &c, five stripes.
Tuesday, To staying four hours at
mill longer than necessary. ten stripes.
"Wednesday, To not locking the hall
door at night five stripes.
Friday, To letting horse so without
water, five stripes.
Total, twenty-five stripes.
Tony c.
Monday, BY iirs,-ratc days work in
the garden. ten stripes.
Balance due, fifteen stripes
The balance being thus struck, the
Captain drew his COW hide and renarked
Nov Tony. you black scamp, what
say you. you lazy villain, why shouldn t
give YOU fifteen lashes across your back.
as hard as can draw"
Stop old Massa,' said Tony; dar's de
work in de garden sir-dat ought to take
off some'
You black dog said the Captain.
.havn't given you the proper credit Of
ten stripes, for that. Come, comet
Please old massa,' said Tony, rolling
his eyes about, in an agony Of freight
.dar' s-you forgot-dar's de scourin' OBJ
de floor-old missus say he neber been
scour so good afore.'
Soho. you saucy rascal quoth Captain
S. you're bringing in more offsets; are
YOU! Well now, there'-here the Cap
tain made an entry in his book-'you a
credi. of five stripes, and the balance
must be paid
Cor a-mity, massa. don't hit yet--dar's
sumpen else-or Lord! please don't-ves
sir-got UNI now--ketchin' de white boy
and fetchin UNI to old missus, wat trow
rock at de young duck
That's fact said the Captain-'the
outrageous young vagabond-that's a
fact, and I'll give you credit Of ten
stripes for it, wish you had brough,
him to me-now we'll settle the balance.
Dress de Lord. old massa.' said Tony.
.dat's all Tony grunted extravagan,ly.
The Captain adjusted his tortoise she'll
spectacles, with great exactness. held the
book close to his eyes. and ascertained
that the fact was as stated by Tony. He
was not little irritated.
You swear offthe account, YOU inferno al
rascal-you swear off the account do
you'
All de credit is fair, old massa,' an
swered Tony.
Yes. but'-said the disappointed Cap
tain-'but-but' still the Captain was
sorely puzzled how to give Tony fen
Hcks anyh idea popped in
to his head-,rhere's my cost. you incor-
rgible. abominable scoundrel. You want
to swindle me do You. out OF my costs
YOU black deccitful rascal! And added
Captain Slick, chuckling as we'll at his
own ingenuity as well as the perfect just
ness of the sentence; 'enter up judgment
against you for costs ten-sirIPes ,-and
forthwith administered the stripes ant
satisfied the judgment
Hi, ngger.' said Tony; xxi. niger
VIVA, dis judgment for coss. old mass:
talk bout Done get off bout blackin
de boo,-get off bout stayin, long time a
/ de n1ill-and ebry ting else-but di
judgmen, for coss GIN me de debbil.--
Bress God. niger mus keep out oh d
+ ole stable. for | tell YOU what. da. jmdg
men. for coss make he back feel might
wacln. fo- truc.'