davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1849-07-30

herself, as she broke<opeh the letter with
smile of satisfied vanity. ssLet's see
what he saysr' 81
She read as follows:
stt7'o our dear Lydia;
Gas you are now in all probability, la
boring under the erroneous impression
that you have played a most admirable
trick off on US, we have formed oarseves
into Joint committee Of two, in order to
devise means for setiipg your mind at rest
upon the subject. 1'halruah is dear Lyd-
ia, we, the nndersis understand our
salxes-aa d GIa =o5thef Perfectly, and see
through your entire course oi. conduct bet
ter than YOU imagine. However, we have
formed the wise resolution to allow you 10
rstain your natural colors through life, be-
fore we so far forget our self respect as 10
think of inducing you to become either
Brown or White.
"Trusting that this official document
contains such an explanation Of our views
MS you will readily understand, We hereby
bid you an affectionate adieu, hoping you
mo hoso oCtIOt ouCCGso liz JOtti tSiHpls
on others.
.,e;u, TIMOTHY BROWN,
E 0e"7'' OLIVER WHITE
r. .S.-(Not Official )-Messrs. Brown
and White beg leave mildly to suggest to
their dear Miss Lydia, that in future, when
she is in want of victims. she will stand Q
better chance Of meeting with success, if
instead of attempting such sterling colors
as athats and bro1b1s, she should try some
thing more nearly approaching a green,
Lydia read this important document twice
before she fully understood its import; then
in fit OF vexation and age; she threw ii
on the floor and stamped upon it with heI
pretty little foot.
/. When the first burst Of rage had passed
she reflected that she was no more than
justly punished for her foolish, hearlsss
firtations. The event proved salutar!
lesson to the pretty Lydia for from thai
time she gave over practising anything
like coquetry, and became very sensible
sort Of girl.
A year after, Lydia married raspecta
BILE young farmer, and sent to her ole
friends, Brown and White, polite and
pressing invitation to attend the wedding
Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1849-07-30

nFThe editor of an exchange says he
never saw but one ghost, and that was the
ghost of a sinner who died without paying
for his paper. "'Twas terrible to look
upon-the ghost in Hamlet was not a Cir
cumstance.
Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1849-07-30

PoIsoNINe.-The o'hsr day Mrs. Snip
kins. being unwell, sent for medical man.
and declared her belief that she was pois-
oned, and that Mr.. snipkins uid it. 81
didn't do it," shouted Snipkins. ....It's all
CANNON; she isn't poisoned. Prove ii,
doctor; open her on the spot-I am acllI-
ing"
Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1849-07-30

Too MUCH coMpANY.-"Ah! Mr.. Simp-
kins, we have not chairs enough for, our
company" said gay wife to her frugal
husband.
aPlenty Of chairs, but loo much COM
panv," piled Mr.. Simpkins.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

A "SUCK INA couple Of raw 'uns
from the country were cut one evening
seeing the lions of cur good city, when
they came across one of the theatres -
Il say Jake said the eldest, who gloried
in the appsllatlon of Johnathan, I've
heared of these theatres. and root or die,
Im bound to see one of 'em.' But Jake
didn't seem disposed 10 GO in. and an
agreement was made that he should sit
upon fire plung and smoke a cigar while
Jonathan took peep at the elephant
He accordingly went in aud about fifteen
minutes returned with wolf long visage.
'What's il llke!' inquired Jake.
"A regular suck in said Jonathan. -
They've got a dod darned big picture
stuck up again the wall and lot Of fel
lers fddling before il; add that's all the
show!'
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

Couples are ssconced 10 some shaded ais
cove. or groups dotted about the room,
in mirthful or serious conversation. No
one is required to speak to his host, eis
ther entering or departing. Lemonade
and baskets of fruit stand here and there
on the side tables, and all may take who
like; but eating, which constitutes SO
great part Of American entertainments,
is slight and almost unn oticsd incidsnt
in these festivals of intellect and tasts.-
Wouldst thou like to see such social ins
terCourse introduced here! Theu do it.
But the frst step must be complete indif-
ference to Mrs. Smiths assertions that
you were mean enongh to put less shorts
ening in the under crust of your pies th an
the upper. Let Mrs. Smith talk accors
ding to her gifts; be thou assured that all
living souls i5se frssdo ON better thanCakes
or under crust. - @ ~
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
The fist Spree.

'Nsver was drunk but once in my life ;
said chap in my hearing, never mean
to be again. The street seemed to be
very steep, and lifted my legs at every
step as if vas getting up stairs. Seve-
raj cart wheels were making oonvolutions
IN my brain, and at one time | fancied
that my head was large carving and
turning establishment, tho lathes of which
! was keeping in motion with my own
feet. l couldn't conceive what was the
reason that the tewn had turned into such
an enormous hill, and what made it worse
was that it seemed all the while growing
higher, and threatened to pich over to
me. Step, stop, thought /, and I'll head
this old bill yet, or at least it shan't head
me So | turned round TO 60 down and
get at the bouom-but hang me If the
town did not turn round with me, head
ing me all The time, and presenting a
bluff in front Of me. Well sure enough
the ground soon flew up and struck me in
the forehead, and as soon as the stars
cleared away ! commenced clim hing W ith
my hands aud knees. The next thing
saw was big brick house coming full
split around the corner! and | believe it
ran right over me, for DON'T remember
any more!'
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
extraordinary Surgical Ope ratio

We learn, says the Boston Journal that DR..
Warren, of this city, recently took from the
stomach of an Irish girl, at the Massachusetts
general hospital, by means of an incison, a
tape worm forty -one feet and eleven inches
in length. The operation was performed
while the sufferer was under the infience of
ether. She observed, In coming to her sen.
ses. Oh! have had pleasant dream, and
feel relieved The wound was dressed with
great, care and she scarcely complained of
pain since the operation. This, we are told,
Is the only case on record where the tape
worm has been literally cut from the human
stomach.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
DEFINITION OF NOTHING

At the Donegal assizes the following
humorous cross examination Of a witness
occasioned much merrimeat in the court
Mr.. Doherty--'W What business do you
followl' esq
Il am a school MASTER
Did you turn off your scholars, or did
they turn you Off"
i do net wish to answer prevalent
questions Laughter.)
: Are you q great favorite with your pu
pilsl'
Aye, troth am /; a much greater fas
vorite than you are with the public
Where were you this night?
THIS night says the witness: 'thare is
learned man for you; this nigh. ls not
come
EHere the witness hooked at the Judge
aud v linked his aye as ifin triumphl
i presume the schoolmaster WAS alb.
road that night doing notbingr inquired
the attorney.
Define nothing said the witness.
Mr.. Doherty did rot comply.
w ell; said he learned schoolmaster,
L will defne it; ii is :ootless stocking
without leg fRoars of laughter, in
which the Judge joined.l
You may GO down. sir
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
From Bowen's North American Farmer.
Mans Food.

What do men really live upon! The
answer will he various enough. The
Guachc, who in the wild pampas OF Bue.
nos Ayres, managing his half, wild horse
lasso, or holss, TO catch the ostrich, the
guauaoo, or the wild bull, consumes daily
from 10 to l2 pounds of meat, and regards
ii as a high feast day when in any haciea.
da he gains variety in tho shape of a
morsel Of pumpkin. The word bread does
not exist in his vocabulary. The lrshs
man, on the other hand; gales himself in
careless mirth on his potatoes and point,
after a day ofpainful labor. he who can.
not help making joke even Of the name
he gives to his scauty meal. Meat is a
strange idea to him, and he is happy ins
deed If, four times year, he can add a
herring 20 season the mealy tubers. The
hunter of the prairies lays low the buffa.
10 with snre bullet; aud its juce, fats
streaked hum, roasted between two hot
siohOS, 10 W thc bTtdtoSt Ol uGllCA-
cies. Meanwhile, the industrious Chi.
nese carries to market his carefully fat
tened rats ,delicately arranged upon white
sticks certain to find a good customer a.
mong the epioures of Peken: and in his
hot, smoky hut, fast buried beneath the
snow and ice, the GreeDlander consume.
bis fat, which he has just carved, rejo cling
over the costly prize, from strand ad
whale. Here the black slave sucks the
sugar. cane, and eats his banana; there
the African merchant fills his wallet with
sweet dates, his sole sustenance in the
long desert journey; and there the Siam.
ese Grams himself with quantity of rice
from which an European would shrink ap,
palled. And wheresoever over the whole
inhabited earth we approrch and demant
hospitality, In almost every little sport
different kind Of food is set before us, and
the daily bread't offered In another TO rm
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
Perfect Happiness.
Ans.--The snail.

A laudrsss. who was employed in the
family of our former Governors, said to
him, with sigh:
'Only think. your excellsncy. how little
money would make me happy'
How little, madam!' says the GoverGa
or.
oh! dear sir, one hundre dollars would
make me perfectly happy
II that is all, you shall have it, and he
Immediately gave ii to her.
She looked at it with JOY and thankful-
ness, and, before the Governor waa out OF
hearing, exclaimed:
Il wish had said ttoe hundred
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

The tender hearted youth, of whom
was born the following effusion, was las
seen putting for the woods, with 'hunk
of gingerbread under his arm, and hi
eyes, in fine frenzy rolling
But sickness and afiction is trials sent
BY the will of a wise creation,
And always ought TO be underwent
With fortitude and resignation,
Then mourn not for your pardner's death,
But to submit, endevver;
For sposen she badent died so soon,
She couldeut lived forever.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
MANNERs.-I make il a point az mora

MANNERs.--I make it point Of mora
ty never to fnd fault with another Of
manners, they may be awkward or 81
ful, blunt or polite, polished or rustic.
care not what they are. If the man meant
we'll aud acts from honest int tentions with
out eOcentricity or affection. All men
have not the advantage of good society,"
as it is called, to school themselves 10 all
its fantastic rules and ceremonies, and if
there is any standard of manners. it il
one founded in reason and good sense;
and not upon these artificial regulations.
Manners, like conversation, should be ex-
temporaneous and not studied. I always
suspect man who meets me with the
same perpetual smile on his face, the same
congeeing of the body, and the sams pre-
meditated shake of the hand. Give md
the liz may be rough) grip of the hand tho
careless nod of recognition. and when
occasion requires, the homely but vel.
come salutation, How are you, my old
friendi
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
AN ILLINOIS MOB: ,

The town Of st. Charles, Illinois as
the scehesof a great excitement on the
10 III ofApril, while under the control Of
a mob. 1t appears thata company Of me n
--father, brothers, aud husband Of young
lady, from DeKalb county, whe had re.
Gently died-vsited the. town on tho 18th
alleging that she. had been rssurreoted i,
procured a search warrant, and, with
Sheriff Yates, s,@searched the disseeting
room and premises Of DR.. Richards; not
finding the body. yet finding enough to
satisfy the relations that she had been
there, and under the hand OF the opera.
tor, such as hair and other evidences OF
identity.
The relatives returned home about ten
o'clock, when double teams, loaded with
men. and men on horse back, were seen
coming into the town in every direction
until some 200 men arrived, with a full
equipment, from rife to a revolver.
They marched to the doctors premises,
gathering strength as they proceeded, nn-
til formidable force was congr0gated.
Allthe details cannot be given, but ths
result was, that after some negotiation
as to the giving up OF the body 10 her
friends, two shots were fred from Richs
ards house, one NY him on opening the
front door, and firing into the crowd, the
other shot from the upper window by his
son; and what is remarkable, neither shot
took effect save in the coat Of one OF the
outsiders.
This was signal for general battles
the mob fred in return, one ball taking
effect in DR.. Richards right side and
passing out between the shoulders near
the spine-another ball making an entry
above the hip bone o. one of his students
Mr.. Reed )and passing diagonally through
him.
1t was Immediately reported that Rich
ards was dead, but he presented himse II
again at the doar to show his wounds,
when heavy stone hit him on the right
aide of the face, which brought him down,
or nearly SO, at the same time pistol
shot took effect in his right hand or wrist
The mob thea broke out all his win
dows, aud injured his furniture, and after
wards dispersed, The citizens OF the
town took Ii,tle part in the proceedings;
such as did, sympatbized with the strang.
ers; for this establishment has been a
grievous nuisance for years.
After dressing the wounds, they are
found to be dangerous. Very lItlle pros
pects of the recovery of DR.. Richards.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
WOMAN S LOVE-.

How many bright eyes grow dim; how
many soft cheeks grow paIei how ma ny
lovely forms fade away into the tomb, and
none can tell the cause that biighted their
leveliness! As the dove will clasp its
wings to its sides, aud cover = nd concea
the araow that is preyipg upon its heart,
so it is the nature of woman TO hide from
the world the papgs of wounded affection.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
alpoRtr94
BEAUTY OF EXPRESSION.

~~~@
I do not care for those mere picture faces,
That look upon one as from forth frame,
And which, though..met in twenty different
Are every where and evermore the sa me.
Give me the eyes that may with tears DER.
flow,
Or eyebrows that may from-if there's oc.
casion,
Cheeks that with dimpling smiles can warm.
ly glow
In all the living beauty of expression.
can forego skin Of pearly whiteness,
Pardon nose not strictly Greek or Ro
man,
And don't expect that a perpetual brightness
Dwes in the eyes Of any mortal woman.
Yet | should hope within them to behold
Sweet shades of kindly feeling every stray
ing,
While o'er her lips, though not of classic
mould,
Unconscious smiles should aye be calmly
playing.
A little paint may give clear complexion,
Or art supply the most luxuriant hair;
But nought can e'er bestow that sweet refec.
tion
OF pure mind my fair ones face should
wear.
The soul, itself ethereal, most esteems
The loveliness akin to its own nature
And of mere outward beauty little deems,
To mind that glows and speaks in every
feature.
In short, do not seek some peerless beauty
With sculptured charms and graces super
human,
But something filter far for earthly duty
A loving, pleasing, kind, and thoughtful
woman.
For when with years mere outward fairness
ceases
To charm the heart with the old glad emo
tion,
The beauty Of expression still increases.
And fills the soul with ever fresh devotion
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
MUSINGS.

OI wish was in eden
Where all the beastes is feeding,
the Piggs and Cows and osses,
And the long tule Bull what tosses
and the Bulldog and the Rabit
accuse its his habit,
Where Lions, Tigers, Monkees,
And them long cared things called Donkey
Meat altogether daylee
With Crockedyles all skaly.
Where sparros on the bushis
Sings to their mates the thrushes,
an Hawks and little Rens
Hawks about like Cocks and Ems,
One looking at the luther
For all the World like Bruther,
Where no quarlin or Phytin,
its true wot me aritin.
. for waunk rt even,
somewhere abowt or z.
When the Son be giving to bed,
With his Ease fyree red
o for the grades and rezings
We ripens at all seesins,
the apples and the Plumbs
As Big as my 2 thumbs;
the hayprecots and peechis,
Wot all within the reech is,
And we mought pick and heat
paying nuthlng for the treat.
o for the pooty tiours
A bloomin at all ours.
So that large Boka
Yew may gather any day
OF Try Aaurthat blose,
from collsfour to Rose.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
ANECDOTE.

A darkey set to work to cut down d
very tough tree, but his axe flew back, f6r
some time, with but little effect. A storm
occurred meantime, and crushing shaft
of lightning shattered huge oak to spliu.
ters near him.
"Bress de Lord!" exclaimed Sambos
"dat we'll doue. 'Poze you try dis one
nex;' guess you get your match, massa!"
Am. Union.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

Two excellent and worthy diyiues
named Strong and Bacon, met one day at
a butchers stall, where some swIne's
heads were exposed.-Says DR.. Bacon TO
DIR. Strong, can You tell me, DR.. Strong
Why hogs head is- called a ministers
facer For the same reason, | suppose,
says DR. Strong, that his rulup is called
bacon! Hartford Gazette.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

Increase Of Popalation.-Mrs. Miller, re-
siding near Harrisburg, on Monday last gave
birth to fee boys, all of which, are alive and
doing we'll. What makes the case singular
is, that at her first confinement she gave birth
to t,oo, and at her second to three and at this
her third, to fue, making in all fen children in
four years, and all living.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

MA, DON'T YOU WISH you had the
tree oievil IN our garden!'-'Why, Josh,
you rarpent, what do you mean? As
moneys the root of all evil, if we had the
tree. couldn't we get all tha precious
stuff Drat you, you Pssky vsrmin,,
you're getting too smart, entirely; that's
what comes OF sending boys to macada-
miles,
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

AN ARAB REToRT--' Why do you not
thank God asked Mansur of an Arab,
that, since / have been your ruler, you
have never been afflicted with the plaguep
God is too good to send two scourgsd
upon us at once was the reply, but 1t cost
the speaker his life.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
Sailor and the Highwayman.

A sailor was once travelling in a coach
which was attacked by robbers.
Your money said one of the robbers
to tho sailor.
You shan't have it, said Jack.
Then will out your brains
'Blow away--I may as well be with QUE
brains, as without money. Drive on
coachea.'
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

THAT CLERcYMAN.--Thers is mention
made of a dull clergyman who cornered d
farmer whom he seldom saw at his miniss
trations, by asking him directly, after q
little reproof for his ain of omission, Shall
we see you at church nest Sabbath
Ye'e-s,' he replied slowly, 'y.e.e.s, I'll
go--or send hand!' 1t was the same in.
teresting clergyman who, one hot, drowsy
summer day found, on concluding long
discourse, that half his congreg alton were
rubbing their eyes and waking up. being
startled at the sudden silence; whereup-
on he very quietly said: MY friends, this
sermon cost me good deal of labor, id
fact rather more than usual, you don [
seem to have paid quite as much atten-
ton as it deserves. think l will 60 over
it again!' And 60 over it he did, FROM
text to exhortation. He shad 'em there
didn't !-Kniekerbocker.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18
CONNUNDRUMS.

o. What is sure way for tinman ID
make any soldier his strong friend!
Ans.--By knocking his eye (I out.
or What horned animal, common i'd
the United States, can see best with bid
eyes put out?
Ans.--The snail.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

A railroad, one would suppose, was. The
last thing to be injured by Ere, but two
hundred feet Of the railroad near Savan-
nah was de,royed in that way receatlys
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

ExAMPLEs.-'See here, my friend yod
are drunk!' Drunk! to be sure aud
have been for the last three years. You
see my brother and are on temperance
irightful example"
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

Brasidas, the famuus Lacedemonian
general caught a mouse; it bit him. aud
BY that means it made its escape. 'Oh
Jupiter!' exclaimed he, what creature SO
contemplate but may have it's liberty il
it will contend for ii.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

sOh, pant for glory, pant for renown!
said a ragged man of genius to his friend
We'll, if you've a pair Of pants, you'd
better put them on was the cool relent'
less reply.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

The cimBx of human indifference has
arrived when woman don'i care how she
locks.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

In village in the west of England there
is suspended over The door a board with
this incription; -'ScbooIing for little boys
and girls at Cd per week; them as larns
manners ID more.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

Diligence IN empio, ,ments of less cons
TO greater eDterprizes.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

Ohio, though but half a century old
has more collegiate institutes than an,
other State iu the Union.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

If the best mans faults were written or
his brow, they would make him pull hi
hat over his eyes.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

A Yankee at Boston has a rotary sewing
maehine,' which will sew ayard a minute
with the fast stitch, made in sewing ths
seams Of pantaloons.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

A clock or watch IL said to have the
leasL sef-estsem of any article of manu-
facture as it is continually running itsei
down. ~
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

CO A girl must not get angry because
every body else does not admire her lover. 1t
is not natural for all to be attracted by the
objest.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

The rose is sweetest when ii first blooms
and the spikenard root when it dies.--
Beauty belongs to youth and dies with
it, but the odor of piety SURVIVES destn
and perfumes the tomb.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

Il eau boast of rank, as the butter said
90 the cheese. Anu am strong and mil
ky, ss tue cheese replied.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

A friend efours carries his sense Of hon
or 40 Far az to spend his time in perfect
idlensss, because he does not like to take
adpaniag of time.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

A smart boy that who asked his father
what kind of wood the board OF health was
made Of.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

Sucress Is the offspring Of Perseverance
- Despalrsthe father Of Ruin.
The Democratic pioneer. [volume] (Upper Sandusky, Ohio) 1845-1853, 1849-05-18

.sTbsre's the house you are after, my
dear. The drunkard looked up and read
'efocH Ssertsinment for man aud Beast.