The Sumter banner. [volume] (Sumterville, S.C.) 1846-1855, 1849-04-04

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It's q mighty bad failin' in d gun to
90 Oft half locked And the chap that
uses one of that sort is certain TO shoot
suthinI bigger ner o gobblerin the long
run, but tho man that goes off half.
cooked is as shua as falin' off log to
shoot hissclf, and more ner onst too. q
It's alters best I reckon to- look at a
thing all over twiste, afore you meddle
with it. '
z i sknowed an old doctor onst, as clev-
er a soul as ever trottcd pottercary stuff
through q man, but his har-trigger was
sot too fine, and through it war amost
the ondly failih' he had, it war enuff to
Keep him in hot water all the time.
lie war powerful fond of his farm
and garden, but somewhot 'nuther nu-
thin went well thar, he was alters a git.
tin some new kind in his head, and
afore he got half through one spear.o-
ment, he'd be a barkin' loud on some
other trail. i - 9s4
Twarnt at all surprisin' that when
ne had 50 many things goin' on in his
tield, he hadent any time tcfsee to the
fences around it.
The cattle tormented him powerfully;
they got used to comm in, and come
they would.
One of his naybors had pair of
beeyes that war mighty onruly, to be
shua, and he consulted, they wai alters
the ring leaders in breakin in. 81
Arely one mornin' he got up and
went out cf his cabin, and putty soon
heard the corn stalks q crackin,' but
there war heavy fog on, and he couldn't
see ten foot ahead, SO he started offfull
split for the noise, and afore long sot
eyes on suthin' that looked white among
the corn.
"By Ned,' says he, eff it amt that
owdacious critter Of Miss Marsh's
helpin' himself in broad day light, sep
tin the fog, that's putty chunkcd; com
ing 1T rayther too strong / rcckon..-I
said I'd pepper him the fust time trccd
him in my field, and by thurde. I'll do
it -
Back he went to the house and took
down one Of the boys guns; it war the
old mans first experience in frin 'unc,
and of you could hcv seen him put in a
handful of powder and shot, all mixed
up, you'd hev allowod it war doze Of
calemel and epekak he war mixin' for
some misfortenit crittcr.
After he'd rammcd it all down, aud
put in nigh on to a half q pound O. cot.
ton to keep all quiet, out lie put, craw-
led up clus to whar the beef war man
kin his breakfast, ond let fly, chce-
bang!
For the fust fire, it was a mighty
good Que, and fetched three things to
onss--the gun bust, the old man dropped
like he'd been shot hisself, and the big
gcst part of him made q hole in the
ground that they had to fill up after
wards like an old well, for he weighed
clean above two hundred, and the nay
bors that lived too fur off to hear the
gun felt the shock aud tux it for lew
cnAilc arthquake on mineatcwr plan.
The beef swung backwards and for
wards asccond er two, jest as ifhc war
putty well corned, and her war too,
then down he dropped, gin bellor, and
kecled up.
In mint here come the boys from
the house q humpin' it and hoopin'.
"By thunder!" says one on 'cm, s:cf dad
han't gono and done it now. II be
derned-I recon Miss NIarsh's beef has
.5ot as much Of q grist to grind as hc'lc
want for some time; halo! farther! are
you tired, er what ere ye squattin' down
that way fer?''
The old man sot still, didn't say a
word, ner try to git up, and cf he had, !,
t'would hey been ofno sorteruse.
Well, thar he sot fer ten minits, and
all the hoys could do they couldn't cit
a word out ov him, till at last, by pri.
zln' and littin,' they got him on his legs
agin, and then arter scratchin' his head
awhile, says he
"John, which eend ov n gun do You
mostways use to pint at anythin,' when
You want to knock it over?''
"Why," says John, "the lcetlc one
in course.'
"And do you ginerally put the pow
deI afore the lead, or a, ter it,"
"Why, aforcit to be sure"
"Well," said the old man, "then I'm
satisfied, fer | put both in together, and
that accounts fer both cends goin' off
to onst, but I allow Miss NIash's beef
has got tho tother half, and you'd best
| see -