The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1849-11-02
OTTAWA, ILLINOIS, FRIDAY, NOVEMBER g 1S49.

plalnt WIN the OIu gentleman aoeout
his sun, that we could not safely be-
licve one single word he said. This
was at least twelf-month before we
requested him to catch the rats
The old man come, looking very
much concerned, no doubt suppos-
ing that his sun had been guilty of
high burglary upon the sea; and
neary ready to cry out. 'Gashplng
for BREATH says the old gentleman,
what has he been DOM? Says we,
lyin,' Thomas. He's the biggest
liar, for so small boy, we ever seen.
We can't believe him. We can't
rely on him. We can't trust him
We can't repose any confidence in
to him; but this with reference to
other matters and not Of the rats
And we then told him right out
We suppose you never seen col
ored mans countenance so brighten
up. A load seemed to be taken
from his stomach to onc-t. First
he grinned like chessy cat, and
then laughed right eout. Lyin,
says the old gentleman. rs that aH?
why Missy says lie, lookn' at our
wife, Wey ,oW do mar And 50
we dismissed the matter. In dispo-
si'ion Walter was kind and Sllectio-
nate, and died greatly regretted by
a large circle Of friends.'
The article on Niblo'S Garden
with 'FrasS-war R-r-r areP-and
those on Births and New Arrivals,
the other two Obituaries and lots
Of the advertisements are sill first
rate. As is often remarked Of new
litcrature-'they alone are worth the
price of number Turning to the
EDITORS Table, how can anybody
with the slightest notion Of the fun
ny, omit the following:-
Nothing, we think, adds so much
to an amusing narI alton as the UNI
consciousness of the narrator that ii
is amusing and to understand the
following, the reader must imagine
a dulliSh Yankee clergyman, with
unmoved face, and not the slightest
idea of there being particle of fun
in what he was saying, as the spca-
ker: Il never heard a more ridicu-
lous and foolish speech in my life,
said he, 'than the member from Golf.
town made in the Legislature this
m rning, on the resolution to abolisl
the militia law, which through grea
abuses had become exceedingly un.
popular with the people. The mem.
Der was of a very military spirit, anc
took the proposed measure greatly
to heart. He at first tried his per,
suasive powers. Meow DON'T 60 tc
dcstroyin' our militian he cntreatec
do MT Do let US try it lcetl'
longer; let us dig abeout it, am
dung it, for another year: do SPAR
it for one more year, Finding how
ever that the persuasive manner wa
only laughed at by his colleagues, h
adopted the threatning style: Il
you do repeal this law, they'll hea
of it in new York, in England, an,
the East Indies; and FOR my part,
said he, with rising infection AM
violent gesture, 'if you do cut off tn
militia, and leave us dcfenceless,
don't care if all the battering- ram
of Jerusalem roam up and down tn
streets of Concord, seekin' WHOM
they may dcvour!.' A battering
ram bent on such sanguinary er
rand, could only be cqualled by
'hydraulic-ram' engaged in asimila
enterprise"
Then again, on the same page, w
have the following graphic aceoun
of the doings of a mob down east
| By the way, we don't have mob
hereaway-at least, very often
Philadelphia is the place for 'muss
cs generally:
eve have seldom heard of an in
, stance of more beautiful simplici,
than was eyinced by mat,er-o.
! fact witness en- a riot trial cas-
! uUNn-CaSt. 'Nlat WcSr tie mo
; doing when yon first saw them
was one of the questions asked b
the district attorney. ''Hhey was
singin',' replied tie witness. Sing
ing = exclaimed the public prosec
cutor; 'what were they singing u
| bout" don't know, I'm sure. bu
they was a-Smgin' any how Wel
what r0s it it? What were the,
saying? What did they seem to b.
tdihing dbOWY wal, as far as
rec-collect,' replied the witness
'they was a talkin' abeout a man O
the name of Mr.. Tucker, who refu
Scd to come home to his tcan Thi
supreme specimen of ignorance an,
simplicity convulsed the whole cour
/ ,r,th l,u.lta.