Democratic banner., 1849-12-17
MIsRELLANEOU
Written for the New York Sun.
THE LAWYER Va n FOOL.

ord THE LAWYER v:THE FOOL.
Deacon Frset, a wealthy drorer resid-
ing in K, one Of the most beautiful snd
aoSurrisbinE townsin the Granite Ststsssxs
taking large number Of selected beeses TO
u 4 s sHsRes s' sass oa' 9ss sGya.ssly-
ststsof the stock belonging to Christopher
Grant, an extensive farmer residing in an
adjoining town, accidentally strayed among
The drove Of Deacon F. The good Deacon
Of course not nothing the addition to his
herd, could not be expected to Separate
them, and in, time all, including those be-
longing to friend Grant, were duly disposed
Of. if not according to law, certainly ac-
cording to his custom and the proceeds
safely deposited in the pocket Of the worthy
deacon. or 49,, q.
It so happened, however, that Bill Dykes
rbettsr known as "The FOOL" saw the cat
tie as they passed, and recognised those OF
Grant.
"Bill,'' says Mr.. G., are you sure it was
my cows you saw in Deacon Ffosi's drove?"
"Sure!" said Bill, "wall now guess are.
/ knows old Brindle and old Lopped-horn
jest as easy as nothing-haint l drive 'em
cut Of our eabbages more times than their
pesky necks are worth anyhow"
When Deacon Frost returned home he
was politely waited upon by MIR. Grant, and
requested to fork oyer affair amount of the
needful for the missing cows, which he as
politely declined, to do. The result was
Counsellor Donny's services were invoked
The Fool was the chief witness; and Ceun-
sellor Grey, of K, a man of some celebri.
ty in his profession, was retained to defend
the suit. The trial came on-Dykes wal
placed on the witness stand. Counsellor
Grey interposed anobiection to the witness
being sworn, on the ground of i~ncapacity,
and proceeded to state TO the court that the
witness was a perfect non c0mpOs mentis,
in other words, a fool, and well known to
be so by every body in that vicinity-thai
he had no definite or fixed idea either re-
gsrding himself or respecting anything else;
that he could not give an intelligent answer
10 the most simple question; aid, says Coun-
sellor Grey with an emphasis, 81 do not be-
lieye he can ever tell who made him. II
your Honor please, I will put that question
to him, that the jury may have an oppnrtu-
nifty to see what a perfect imbecIe he Is"
Counsellor Grey: civilian, look up!-
Tell US William who mede you2 Do you
know ?". us.- -.& III = .'sg .--r
The fool, screwing his face and looking
thoughtful, and somewhat be wildered, slow
ly answered.: "M-o-s-e-s, / ~s-p-o-s-e."
s!"That will do.". ssa.. 80 80
"Now," said Counsellor G.. { addressing
the court "Fhe witness says he s-p-o-s.e.s
M-o-s-e-s made him; this is certainly an in
teiigent answer; more SO than ! supposed
him capable Of giving, for it shows that he
hes some faint idea Of the scripture. But
lssubmit it is not sufficient to justify his be-
lag sworn as q witness in the cause. No,
cir, it is not such an answer as a witness
qualified to testify shonld give."a .~,.. ..
e."ME Judge" says the fool, "may l az the
lawyer arquestion?" sd e af
Certainly says the Judgs, ssssk him any
Question. ypu please" aH .r
7osW-a-ll,t then Mr.. Lawyer, who'd You
s4P-O-s-e made you?" 50 s.. -,
Counselor G., (imitating the witness,)-
&A~a.F.e-n, l~B-p-o-s-e." sbG -. - .
After fhe mirth had somewhat snbsided,
the witness continued: .ta; i-.. ~ T.
"W-s-n,ndw We do read In the cookbook;
hat iA-a-r-c-n once made a. c-a-I-E but
who'd thought the DID crittel had got in
bare H'&LysG 81 Il N-aa-.E a.. s-s,t- .at,
Verdict for: che FOOL. ,,.- ss..sam.a
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