The Camden journal. [volume] (Camden, S.C.) 1836-1851, 1849-05-23
TIE METHODIST DISTlLLER AND
HIS PREACHER.

IllO InLhCIlEh.
Some wears ago. the Rev. Mr.. .Axlcy, OF
eccentric but pious memory, had preached
to one Of the congregations in his circuit,
and after the sermon rs was the custom OF
Methodist preachers in those days, and as it
still is, when they do their duty, the preach.
or had class meeting. lie had questioned
cac, brother and sister on the subject Of
their experience, practice, and enjoyment in
the divine life, giving to each word of Ell
couragcment, comfort and advice, as the
case seemed to require, filling up the inter-
walls by singing suitable verse with life and
spirit until all The members had been ques-
! toned but certain very prominent men,
Der of the church, who, it seemed owned a
eIistillery. and by some means his preacher
found out the fact. When after the most Sc
rinus conversations with others, the follow
ing examination took place
Preachcr.-Well, brother Jerry, how do
you come on making whiskey?
Brother-(Somewhat startled) o, don't
know, tnIerably well enough.
P.-We, brother, tell us how much mo-
ny do you give for bushel Of corn!
d. WCDly-IlEc cents OuSUcl.
P.-Twenty five cents; very cheap that,
| should say but another question brother,
how much whiskoy do you suppose one
bushcl Of corn will make?
B.-Can'l say. ! suppose. about three
gallons. Very much confused.)
P.-So, three gallons! Why that's con-
siderable turn out, should judge. But broth
er what do you get for gallon of whlskcyl
B.-(Looking rather wildly Scven,y-five
cents.
P.-Scvcnty.Gve cents. Two. hundred
per cent and that too, ! reckon by the barrel;
you get more, suppose by the jug full. But
brother tell your brethren, isn't the slops very
good to fattcn hogs upon!
B.-Ics, pretty good.
P.-And won't the hogs you fatten for
nothing on the slops, come mighty nigh pay
ing for the cornl
B.-WelI, very nigh it.
P.-BHt TO come to tho question, brother,
do you make real good article? Will it
bear bead?
BY this time the brother was so perfectly
confused by tho r-e".;,.r's ItUr,'S 'Sot"rius,
he began to wish he had never seen The
preacher or the dIstilIcry either. The class
could scarcely MAINTAIN their gravity;during
the dialogue, and we need not add that the
poor fellow was SO tormcnled, every time
he met ncighbor, by the salutation, "Well,
brother how do you come on making whis
key?" And do you make real good ar
liclc!"-"NVll it bear a bcad!" that he ac-
tuay broke up his distillery, and became a
consistent Methodist.
Caesar said negro 10 a colorcd friend
Of his which do YOU tink is de most useful
Oh de comets, dc sun or dc moon?'
swell, CIcm. don't tink should be able
to answer dat question, SEEM as how ncv
or had much book larnn'. "
"WcIl, Cesar, 'Spcct dc moon orter take
de fuSl place in ela, partickelar.
why 50, niggcr!'
'Becase dc moon shine in de night when
we need jde;ght, and de sun shine in dc day
time when de light am ob no consequence"
"Wcl CIcm, you is dc most larncd dar-
key cvcr'sccd, guess you Use to sweep
out school house for libn'."
Got paper TO spare :
"Ycs. sir ; here's one of our last. Would
rou like to subscribe. sir, and take it rcgu-
arIv I"
81 would -bu, am too poor"
That man has just returned from the cir
:us. cost so cents lost time from his farm,
80 cents; whiskey, judging from the smell,
It least so cents making a dollar and :
lalf actually thrown away, and then beg
ing for newspaper alleging that he was t
90 poor to pay for It q
That's what we call "saving at the spilc q
nd wasting at the bung-hole.' 4
Pleasure is to woman, what the sun is to !
he flowers if moderately, enjoyed, it beau i'
flies, it rcfrcshcs, and it improves-immndcr- v
tcly, it wilhers, it detcrioates and destroys.
'ut the duties of domestic life, exercised as y y
lcy must bc in retirement, and calling forth :,
Il the scnsbItics of the female, or perhaps ), !,
S necessary to the full development OF her :,
harms, as the shade and the shadow arc to ~
rose, confirming its beauty and increasing d
5 fragrance. p
T1rLEs--Thc celebrated Gen. Charles Lee, IL
the revolutionary army in letter he ad. $;
rcsscd TO Patrick Henry, many years ago, n
MS discancd on the folly Of adhcring 10 emp.
titles: rt
"'rhcre is barbarism crcpt in amongst us m
at shocks me extremely. mean those tin. al
j cpthcts with which we are so brspatrrrd; it
IS crccNcncy and his honor; the honorable Pres.
cnt OF some honorable contention. This lul. hi
me, narscaling cant may he well enough 4.
lptcd to harharons mnnarchies or to gratily l
Z unadultcratrd pride Of The magniGci in Sc
'mpous arislocracirs; but, in great, free. it
anIy Commonwealth, it is quite abominahe hi
or my own part, would rs lief chew hitter hI
nrs. rs be crammcl with Your crccUcucu | ut