Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1849-12-07

AN ELoPEMENT IN CoNTEMPLATIoN-Thc Roches-
ter American is responsible for the following:
COURTING SCENE.-Miss Canada-Please, sir, will
you marry me
Uncle SAM cannot disguise my affection for SO
amiable young lady, but your papa must be con-
suited and must procure his consent.
Miss CO never mind I'll ask him myself, and
if he refuses we'll get up an clopement
A New ZEALANDERs DESIRE EATEN.-"Fve
been among the New Zealanders'' quoth Jack, "and
there thew use each other for fresh grub regular
as boiled duff in a man-of-wars mess. They used to
cat their fathers and mothers when they got too old
to take care of themselves; but they We got to
be civilized and SO they only eat rickety chill
dren and slaves and enemies taken in battle" "A
decided instance of the progress OF Improvement and
march of mind,' said l. ''Well,' replied jack 'but
it's bad thing for the old folks They don't take to
the new fashion-they are in favor OF the good Ola
custom. | never seed the thing myself; but Bill
Brown, messmate of mine once told me that when
he was at the Bay of Islands, he seed great many
poor old souls going about with tears in their eyes,
trying to get somebody to eat them. One OF them
came off to the ship, and told them that he couldn't
find rest in the stOmachs of any of his kindred, and
wanted to know if the crew wouldn't take him in
The skipper told him he mOnstrous short al
lowances but he couldn't accommodate him The
DOOR old fellow Bill said looked though his heart
would break There were plenty of sharks round
the Ship and the skipper advised him to jump
board but he couldn't bear the idea of being eaten
raw."-Kilotah, IN BLackaroofS Mag.
A CoM1CAL CHIEF MoURNER.-The London Times
describes singular scene which occurred recently
in the vicinity of st. Peters Churchyard WalWorth
road. A cOstermOnger named GOthard, died OF
cholera. The deceased had been remarkable for the
attention and care bestowed upon favorite donkey
purchased by him twenty-six years ago. Such was
his affection for his M0ak," as he called him, that
it was his practice on every Christmas day, to give
him the first cut of the plum pudding treat which
the animal seemed to enjoy, as he ate the plummy
delicaey with the greatest avidity, and washed II
down with pint of strong ale: Even on his death
bed GOthard did not forget his favOrite, for in his
will he directed that the donkey should follow hin
to his grave chief mourner. This extraordinary
request soon got wind in the neighborhood, and a
the time appointed for the funeral, Thousand
IF nersons assembled in the churchyard. The au
thorities connected with the church, determined tina
such an uuseemly exhibition should not be allowed
The friends in consequence, determined only to leat
the donkey as far as the end of t-ane. Durin;
this portion Of the mournful procession, the ANNA
walked at the head of fourteen couple OF mourners
with Grape tied round his ears. so great was tn
crowd about the church, that the aid OF the polio
was obliged to be called in to prevent some Thousand
from forcing their way into the church and ehurcf
ward after the corpse. Order with some dlihcu
ty preserved, and the burial service was pertorme
by the Rev. Mr.. O'RILEY, one of the curates.
downeast skipper, who, with boy, was tryin
to MANAGE a small sloop, when the master of Lii
erpool packet who had been lodging out of their wa
incensed at their awkwardness cried out" VIII;
sloop is that ~ "The Sally, from Maine" RESPOND
ed the Yankee. "Who commands her @ We'll
replied the skipper, undertuk to- but SWeo" she
ten much for me!n'
CoNUNDRUMs.-Why is young lady In love IKE
railroad engine! Ans. Because she has tender
tachment.
Why is girl who loves fisherman, like ma
devoted to wealth +! Ans. Because she worships
shad-er.
Why is a railroad laborer like an escaped convict
Ans. Because he makes tracks.
Why is Yankee in close quarters like mouse
Ans Because he will crawl out through sma
hole
Why should anglers and shepherds be always ha
up Ans. Because they get their living by hook al
by crook.