Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1849-03-15
MISCELLAN EOUS.
MAX STOLPRIlU.5
a TAhE oF RAsmFuLNEss.


There is p certain misfortune in the world,
not usually enumerated in the list of com.
mon misfortunes but which, nevertheless,
ought to be. afford living illustration to
the truth, of my assertion 7i a8
My father, God rest his. soul sent me dill
gently to school there gained some knowl-
edge, although our city schools at that period
were none Of the best
Every one said "AIax has talent. lrft. he
is shy and awkward5 cannot adapt himself to
the ways of the world, never knows what to
do with his hands and feet otherwise he is
good and clever fellow enouglf.s
Such was the general opinion Of me
Reader, do you perceive my failingl My
worldly education was defective, Dligent
in school and in the work, / was uncleanly
and negligent in my attire; was civil, oblig-
ing and honest, but bashful withall, SO that
run of when unknown persons approach
ed my eyes never knew where to look for
resting place when addressed by stranger,
and if called upon to meet lady with civil
ty and politeness, became rooted to the
spot, speechless and stiff as ramrod.
Enough-polilcness aud ease of manner,
as they are called, are concerns no less per-
tanning to life and lifes comfort, than bread
and potatoes, andNa glass Of wine
. Many young gentlemen, as / have often
observed. are greatly wanting IN. these re.
spects- Many aone on going into society is
sadly at a loss how to dispose Of his extremi-
ties, and would, one can easily perceive,
have much rather left them at home Many
such an unfortunate knows mot where to
quarter his hands, thrusting them at one mo
ment into his waistcoat, at another into his
breaches pockets, then in despair raising one
or the other to his occnpit, there to scratch
by way Of variety
Among the other illluck entailed BY my
awkwardness, may be rcckoned that Of being
still a bachelor, Of shaving reached my fifty
second year without being blessed BY wife,
No sooner was my id Aunt dead, and /,
her sole heir, thereby rendered comparative
~ afiuenk than /, then mi my thirtieth year.
was led to seek the hand sof young lady,
Who, 10 other qualifications added beauty,
virtue, suitability and nsalth besides f'
HaiIsuas we'll pleased with the pretty Barba-
! IA matters were quickly arranged, and no
thing remained but 20 cultivate the acduaint-
ance l was accordingly to meet her at the
house Of her cousin, and an invitation to
dine was forwarded % me
OF large parties / had perfect horror,
my aforesaid defective education making me
shy and timid, but then what win not mail
do to secure the fyor Of pretty Barbara
So l put on my besl Sunday sui, white silk
stockings, bran new hairbae and apple
green coat with large pearl butt6us--in a
word made myself as smart a. . bridegroom
On feacbfpg abe 1de>r a th9 c0usin's
teuse. hosereE. NJ hesrt hegao 70 tbunp
against.ny ribss = thongl I had smithy
Iithip N brepst, II I could only feel IS
sured there win not b q party. slough I
would 70 he&sen Il we're over Fortunately
I fsand ne cousin Alone, making up q 20.
count il his study, AIou are somewhat
late, friend 0tolplisa,p sid he made
twenty ibclinations fish and left, and laugh
Cd IN rsrIsct Hsony % look agreeable Or