The Camden journal. [volume] (Camden, S.C.) 1836-1851, 1849-05-09
JOHN SMITH.

THE SEQUEL TO "cApT. RICE's TREAT"
Some few years since, gentleman resi-
ding not an hundred miles from this, travel
ling, in the ncighhoring State of Arkansas.
on collecting expedition had occasion to
call upon n customer who we shall call John
Smith-not the immortal John Smith Jr.,
who writes for The newspapers but in all pro-
bability, relation of the great original whose
portrait hangs upon peg against the cabin
wall. Being. as he thought in the neighbor-
hood, not knowing prccisely the wherea-
bout oflhe aforesaid John Smith, he accost-
ed a copperas-striped specimen of the old
Ncrth Carolina Stale. who was rather list
Iesslv engaged in front of a cabin, hewing
out an axle-tree for an ox-cart, from pine
sapIng.
Travellcr.-Good morning sir; will ynu
have the goodness 10 direct me to John
Smiths?
N. C.-Certainly sir; if there is any thing
r this world do know. il is the way to
J,hn Smiths. Why. John Smith and me
came out together from North Carolina.
We cut out that new road leading across
that branch and over that hill. We
Travcller.-But sir, will you have the
goodness to tell me where he lives?
N. C.-To be sure I will. As | was say
ing, if there is any thing in this world | do
know, it is the road to John Smiths. Why,
sir, John Smith and me married sisters; and
has got the smarlest wife in all these parts.
She-
Travcller.-No doubt of it; sir but want
to see him, and have nothing to do with
the good qualities Of his wife. Will you
direct INC!
N. Coz course will, as said before;
if there is any thing in the world do know,
it is the wav to john Smiths. I ut as was
observing, his wife spins her six cuts day,
besides attending TO family fxings.
Traveller. She may spin sixty for all !
know or care, but that has nothing to do
with my question. ! wish 10 find her hus-
band-wilI you tell me where he lives?
N. G.. Will ] tel you where John Smith
lives? We'll, that's a good one. tell you
again, that if there is any thing in the world
dn know, iii where John Smith lives.
WHY, sir, asl said before, we came from
from North Carolina together. And he has
a yoke of the trucst pulling oxen in these
parts. His negro man jim is tho smart
est
Traveller. My dear sir, it is growing
late and wish to get on. lfyou can direct
me, why don't you do ill ] ask you again
if Won will direct me to John Smiths?
NC. IIav'nt | told you dozen times if
there is any thing in this world | do know,
il is where John Smith llves? Havnt told
YOU that we come from North Carolina TO-
sethcr? But speaking of his boy Jum-he
can pick out his hundred weight of cotton in
a day. anil shell out "a turn Of corn for mlll''
at night, aud no mistake. Besides sir
Traveller. Zrunds, man! what have ] to
do with Jim--rr his cotton, or his corn! l
have asked you plain question, which J
will ask agar. Is there. or is there not, such
a man as John Smith living in this section,
aud if you know the way to his house, will
you POINT it out to me?
&c. And Zonnds, man! havn't | been
telling YOU all the time. that there is such
man as John Smith living in these dgglns;
and if there is any thing in the world do
know, it is the way to his house? tell YOU
again, VIC not only come from North Caro-
lima together, but cut out new road leading
across that branch and over that hill.
Why, sir, John Smith has the smartcst
little daughter you ever saw. She has only
been to school two years, and has got as
far as nmplifcation:
Traveller. Conlound lis daughter, and
her ampIlfcalion too! think you have got
,ha, far Yourself. For when ask you a
plain question, which you might answer in
a half dozen words, you spna long yarn
about roads, wives, negroes, oxen and little
girls. Now do, that's good fellow, just
talk little more like man Of sense, and
show me the road to John Smiths.
NC. Don't you confuund Johns daftcr,
mister; she's my niece, and smart one she
is, too. Why, you arc as tctchous as skin
ned eel, and won't let body direct you
when they arc trying with all their might
TO be short with you as you seem To wish
i'll tell you again, we came from North
Carolina togclhcr--wc bought land together
at dollar and half an acre; we boug ht three
hundred piece. John Smiths land lies Just
across that swamp, but he don't live there
now. You See
Traveller. ! sec am not likely TO get
an answer of you to-day; SO | may as well
keep on. ask you now, and Tor the last
time, will you, or will you not direct me the
way to John Smi,hsl
NC, And liel you now, for the TWEEN,
tieth time, if there as any thing IN Mts 'rorid
| do kaow, ii is The ,cay to John Sm'fhs;
Bu, must tell you about his fine bl""ded
marc and Timolcon filly. She tuck the puss
last Saturday was a fortnight at the Big
Deer Lick course, like falling off log. She's
a holy crlttcr. tell you-and throws IT
down on the gut-and shoots ahead lcetfe