Green-Mountain freeman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1844-1884, 1849-09-27
NAMES.

A recent number of the Literary
World" contains Chapter on Names"
fiom which we take the following. Those
readers who may not at first be able to see
the wit of some of the illusions, we would
encourage TO persevere in hunting it out,
for, to use rather more common than ele-
giant expression, it is thar"
"What can one expect of Potts, a
Hubs, a Stubs, but stumpy, dumpy,
unromantic figure or of Tubbs, but
such an one as is expressly fitted by nature
to illustrate one old proverb often employed,
if not to point out a moral at least to adorn
tale B?
"Priam shouM have been by nature an
lnquisitive person; one that would have
made searching enquiries as to why or how
g the halt his Troy came to be burned
and he would seem to be the very man of
all the world to have been appointed Chair
man of the Committee upon the celebrated
Saltpetre Question.
"Menelaus should have been legislator ;
one prolific in " be it enacted and further
enacted )" and as for poor Dido, no wond-
er she cut up such strange capers with ~
meas, her name is her apology.
eve have always londly imagined that
shoemakers spouses should be Peggles,
gamblers ladies Bets, and that Sue would
he just the wife for an attorney, Harry
strikes us as appropriate for all young gents
with an extra supply of moustache and
whisker. Sophies should be of sedative
disposition, and Dollies misses of the bread
and butter school, strongly attached to in
animate limitations OF miniature infants, far
less troublesome than the much desired o.
riginals, and infinitely cleaner.
sold Noah must have been a very wise
man to have earned his name.
Conlectionels wfes should always be
Pattics those ladies' of an uncertain age
who are always in search of husbands, Ma.
rions; and that go ahead class, the Presi-
dents and Secretaries Of all sorts of female
humbu s. Ledahs.
Sometimes, in our degenerate age, a
name wiH excite remark. Now, lately, all
the papers copied the marriage of cer,an
Henry Apple and Sarah Apple, but are
could see no improperly in the making Of
two apples into one pair
"We think that the ancient names were
also well represented, especially those OF
sacred history.
The Prudes, who keep all men at a dis,
lance, assuredly belong to the tribe of Levi +;
those who admire more ardent lovers are
descendants of Beniah and those who per-
petuaIly appeal to their maternal progeni-
tors, Omar.
"The coIored gentlemen who superin.
tend the preparation Of the miniature dor
mtories on ship, board, are probably A-bcd
-ne-gos. Be .jam-in would be very appro-
pirate for an omnibus driver; and Bll-dad
for any William burdened with the cares Of
paternity.
"The good people of ynn are Shu-ites,
Yankee s%ivan and l'.:', Hyer. Hitites
Of news than tie Herald IT, b ef1 to the
tribe of Cad.
Peregrinating Miesians, in search Of
the remains of burnt wood for soap boilers,
are of Asher's tribe keepers of intelligence
Offices, Hirams; and blacksmiths devoted
to the preparation of wheels, must be de-
scendants of the old families of Tyre.
=" In our opinion all witty ladies', smart
at repartee, should be Salliesi dimnutiye
men, Bobs; harebrainded youths, with
their heads III perpetual whir, Eddies;
and a confirmed topper should be A-brom
:" We know no mere appropriate name
than that Of Benton, who seems bent on hl-
wing his own way on all occasions; and we
} are rather in lined to believe that the de-
termined Colonel and his tigcr-ship of
South Carolina, are pretty good pair of
loco-ioco Matches
And now there is one subject which
has often troubled our enquiring mind; in
the hope of obtaining some new light, we
, make it known
" Is the upper Red River, or that East
ern lake Of pitch and TAR, the proper mod
ern representative Of the classic River
Slyx?