Southport telegraph. [volume] (Southport, W.T. [i.e. Kenosha, Wis.]) 1840-1850, 1849-03-23

squirting Jury.
Once upon time, or to be little more
particular, nearly half a century ago, (for
the editor of his paper we'll remembers the
time, place and scene, which are firmly
fixed upon his boyish reccoIIections) there
dwell in the town Of, in old England,
a remarkable oddly, in the Eerson of an
attorney at law, who, although not fair to
look upon, (for he was in truth one of the
homeliest specimens of humanity ever be-
held by mortal MANI was withal per-
son of sound judgment. great benevolence,
varied learning, poet, a painter, and wit
OF no mean order.
1t so happened that the aforesaid gentle
man, G--G--, Esq, was APP
pointed High Sheriff ofthe town cf--.
He was man Of fortune and had a kind
heart, and many a poor prisoner could tcs-
tify, who partook of the good cheer with
which the prisoners were literally supplied
at Christmas, and other well known festi-
walls, from the private purse of the High
Sheriff.
Ii was of course the duty Of tie High
Sheriff to summon Grand and Petit Jury,
to attend at the Quarter Sessions of which
the Recorder, Mayor and Alderman of the
borough composed the court In the per.
Torrance of his official duty in summonng
the Petit Jury, our High Sheriff INDUCED
in some of the strangest and drollest freaks
that have probably ever been heard of in
any other town or country. In the first
place he summoned for the October Court,
Jury consisting Of twelve of the fattest
men he could find in the borough, and when
they came to the book to be sworn, it APP
peared that only nine jurors could sill com
(ortabIy in the box! After a great deal of
sweating, squeezing and scolding, the panel
was literally famed into the box, and when
seated, they presented to the eye Of the
Court the barrister, and the audience, 1.-The
tightest fit" of jury that ever was seen in
court room. Literally they became,
its robed advocates, "a packed jury" and
no mstake
For the January, our facetous High
Sheriff Gin consequence, II was said, OF some
| hint from the Recorder, that there should
be no more fat pannels summoned 10 his
Court went nIo the opposite extreme
| He summoned twelve of the IedneSt and
taiieSt men he could find in the borough ;
and when they took their seats in the box,
it appeared comparatively emPty-there
WAS indeed room for twelve more of the
same sort and dimensions.
For the April term of Court, our humor-
Gus functionary summoned jury consist
ing of twelve BARRIERS! Now it so happen
ed that among the latter were the very per-
ruquiers who dressed the Recorders and
barrsters' wigs, and some Of The latter. ar
irving late at the bar, had To appear that
! morning in Court with their wigs undress-
ed or haiEdressed, so as to cut very ride
ulous figure, amidst The smiles and half.sup-
pressed laughter of the bystanders. The
High Sheriff enjoyed the fun amazingly,
butlooked grave as Judge" while he
tiled 10 keep silence in the court room.
But the browning joke of this wagsh
! functionary occurred at the summoning of
/ his 4th and last Jury. at the Summer SEES
| sion, in July. For that term of Court, the
High Sheriff not having the fear of the Re-
corder, the Mavor, and the Aldermen before
/ his ewes, actually summoned a squirting
/ Jury twelve as queer looking bipetls as
ever took their seats in jury box-a jury
/ that was probably more looked at, and
laughed at than any of the appointed twelve
/ that ever were sworn, 10 well and truly
Try and true deliverance make betweca their
Sovereign Lord and King, and the prisoner
at the bar"
! But the scene was so irrcstibly drolI that
the learned Recorder could mol maintain
his gravity. The Mayor and Aldermen
followed suit. The Dsrrislers laughed
while their wigs became bald, powderless :
nay, even the poor prisoners in the DOCK,
who were to be put upon their trial, and
some of them undergo transportation, could
not refrain from joining the general each
/ innaloni And when the learned Recorder
commanded the High Sheriff TO bring the
court room TO order, and intimated, with a
half suppressed laugh, that the latter ought
To be ashamed OF himself for summoning
such jury, the dfoRery of this court scene
was heightened considerably by the quick
ready. and sonorous response Of the High
Sheriff, who, looking at the same time al
at the squirting jury, exclaimed" AL
good and lawful men, your Honor"
- The New York Express says the
| Hon. John 4. Collier has just had better
tsyrintl(sii fl,an ,t,at af IT - San,.o- . e.