The mountain sentinel. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1844-1853, 1849-05-10

saw-dust into the old gentleman's S umbrel-
la, told the old gent, who was little def
cient in sight, that the rain was falling; old
gent raised his umbrella, and feeling
shower-of saac-dust-coming down, ex-
claimed, BLESS me, it does rain!' Drake
bawled right out, and hurried off,
The Joker now hailed all the Washing
ton street omnibnses he met, to ask them if
they ran to Charlestown. Drivers sacore,
generally, but Drake laughed in his sleeves
Met an Italian with an organ and monkey;
told him if he would call at his office after
dinner, he would give him half dollar to
play an hour for his children. sYa-es, l
cum,' said the organ-grinder. There's
my address, said the facetious Drake,
giving the Italian caro-, with sFrancis
Tukey, No. = Court Square upon it.
Then hurrying along. the Joker laughed
enough to split his sides at the idea of how
nicely the man and monkey would get
into scrape.
Drake began to feel bad about his morn
ing's work, when his wife came into the
parlor to call him to dinner, and Just then
ljing-a-liogjing went the door bell. Drake
sat down with forebodings that i'll was
! brewing towards his rest; in came his wife
to ask what IN the name of goodness pos
sessed him to go to auction and buy such
a carload of dirty old stoves, pots, chairs,
&c. ME? l buy old stoves, pots and
chairs?' said Drake, trying to belieUe he
didn't. yes, here's the bill, sum $11,
with p. S. at the bottom-sCan't fool
me, friend Drake; like you to come and
bid often. Yours, &C., -
There was no lodging this bill, so
Drake paid it, and ordered the carman to
take the old goods down to Leonard's, Ire
mont street, and tell him to sell them off
at the first sale. The carman took the
cash, and started off again with a chuckle;
Drake went to dinner. The bell soon
rang again; servant girl announced two
gentlemen, who wished to see Mr.. Drake.
Drake slowly and cautiously crawled out
to the door, when two very ferce-looking
persons demanded if his name was Drake.
Drake said that was his name; one of the
red-faced men then intimated that unless
he rendered an apalogy on the spot, for
imposing upon the government officers by
his falsehOod about the smuggling, it was
his determination to 1chate him into glib
lets! Upon hearing this bloodthirsty
defamation, Biddy, the housemaid, who
had been standing close by, ran screaming
into the mistress, to tell her that. two UiH-
aims were going to shoot, stab, and murder
the master in his own house. The wife
dropped all, and ran out, begging them
not to kill her husband. But poor Drake
to get rid of his tormentors, said he would
apologize, do any thing to appease them.
Drake apologised, the wrathy customs
left, and the trembling wife led the almost
fainting Drake back to the dinner table.
| Scarcely had the luckles joker sat dnmn
I when the dOOr-bell rang again, and Blddy
ran in to announce that a carriage was at
the door, and the driver said he was di-
rected to call for Mr.. Drake to carry him
to Mount .4uburn! Drake was trapped
again; the cabman had gotten his track.
He told Biddy to order the carriage away;
the driver grew furious, swore like troo-
per, couldn't April fool him, and unless
Drake paid two dollars cash up, he would
90 and prosecute him right away. All
this, Biddy, as true as the telegraph wires,
announced to her master. Drake search
ed his wallet, found two dollar note,
gave it to the maid; she gave it to the cab
man, and he drove off, with his thumb and
finger to his nose, which Biddy took as a
personal insult, and banged the front door
with great indignation.
! The wife was a reasonable woman; she
saw through her husbands yagaries, but
she didn't tantalize him, or add to his load
of notifications by any recapitulations of
his idle freaks of the morning; she merely
hoped this would be warning to him not
to crack jokes upon people again, espe-
cially where he was so well known and
so easily traced. Poor Drake, he took
nap, then, little refreshed, he started out
to take walk, but as he turned around
the first corner, he was rudely assaulted
by a stalwart fellow armed with a raw
hide, and the way he busted the joker's
jacket was glorious fun for the lookers-on,
and anything but joking to Drake.
sTll teach you, you scoundrel,' said the
raw-hide man, 'to play tricks upon my fa
ther!' and whack, whack, he brought the
raw hide upon the back of the offender.
sGin' it to 'im!' bawled the mob, and gin
it to him he did, until Drake, breaking
loose, scratched gravel for home as fast as
pair of legs ever carried a fagellated
biped in this world. Bruised in body,
torn in mind, and sick and disguised with
his nonsensical folly, Drake did not add up
the expenses of his days work, but swore
solemnIy and roundly too, that if ever he
played April fool again, he would be-
hanged.
| nS. Da.Jor bo,,,,ro Lo,,, 80,