The Davenport gazette. [volume] (Davenport, Scott Co., Iowa) 1841-185?, 1848-08-03
fErnrn the Cairo UelkQ. !
THE PATENT RAG CHEWER.

In small village, not many hundred
miles from this place, there is established a
paper mill, which attracts no small share
Of attention from the curious, aud ELECTS
many visit. as oil are Oi course anxious 10
sec the wonderful process OF converting
old rags into paper. II sometimes happens
that these crowds OF admirers Of the mar
vicious, contain among their number ono Of
those real matter-ot.tact kind OF fellows
who like TO know something of causes as
well as effects, which fact may be illustra-
ted BY the following dialogue
4 sny, stranger, how do YOU get them
there rags fine enough for making raperg
we have men employed 10 chew them,
Sir replied the paper mnn.
To what? to chew them, did you say!
Yes, to chew them 10 he surc--did you
never hear Of chewing rags 10 mike pm
peri?
mo, never did, md would like 10 know
what kind Ut wnges You give, Gaze I've 20,
a little the best set Of teeth you ever did
rec, said the green 'un. .rinning and cnasi-
Ing at the same time in the way ct eXhhi-
tim, with fury TINT made the testing pro.
rfieior quake lest the joke should turn up
on himself in the form Of a personal com
bat.
'Isce, ! SER replied he Of the paper mill,
stepping back Il never saw better Sc, ol
teeth for The business. Well, we give OK.
perienced hands 81 ID per day, and yonng
beginners VIC give 81 90; do you think
you would like the business. Siry
Yes Stree, and The wages toor replied
the other with delight.
VERY well, sir, YOU may set in now for a
month, and al the expiration Of that time
we will no doubt raise your wagcs--hcre.
you NAV commence on ths'--handiug an
old saddle blanket Ia his much delighted
applicant. who took il and sal down 10 his
task with as much sang froid rs m cpcure
would TO IA well roasted piece Of beef steak.
4 say. old pard, do YOU think that ar
blnnkct will stand me anv time ut ali!--
Why, | could chew il all smash up aud
swallow il, beiore you could tell what time
the sun sets by Etton's Almanac
lie set 10 work like n juvenile steam en-
gine, his heavy teeth grinding as if they
were mill stones, the dus. ilying, hu, des-
peratcly intent on earning good Hiring wa
yes. lhnugh the labor was decidedly had
living. With the scracitv OF Bengal H.
ger, md spirit worthy 81 q better cause,
the martyr 10 the progress Of science, con
tinned at his task, wondering beyond all
expression in his own mind, how many
L. re :iar hnu ,.un, ~ ,,.,n !,
tonk, 10 DO the charing of that .tarna,ion
big mill Bat il was ~ vain ;ha, the
heavy jaws wnggcd and the sharp teeth
crushed, the pile Of thr,rea rags did no,
seem 10 grew very fast; and to ndd To the
machines rising feelings "f Indignation. n
crowd began to gather around Ia witness
the singular spectacle at human opposi
ton tn the rag breakers shaking tue whole
building from another apartment.
what in the dernniion nrc you gapin'
aig at last exclaimed the rag chewer
through Il mou,hful I'll rags in state oi
mas'iea!on. 'Drnt &C, there is fifty rag
splin' machines like me up stars, oil in q
bunch-whv don't YOU go and sec tiemy
The crowd looked very much delighted
and expressed themselves highly pleased
with his performance.
'lknow can't 60 il like them fellers mp
stnrs, for my grinders ani used to il vet.
besides ! don't believe horse blankets is
good TO start on, bu, tell you strangers.
when it comes to vi,tles or tebaker, I'm
thar
The fun began to risc, and with il the
rng chewer's Indignation. See here,
Stranger he beloved, splitting OUT his las,
attempt, md hallooing nj his cinplo, or, Who
had I,.st blamed To bIamenatiun
IT I'm going to SIT here aud he laughed u,
10 This ere way-ef yon don't put me up
siars among the rest Of en-. | won't chaw
up another blnuket; darncd ct do
What exclaimed the employer, with
sober face, and very indigna, tly-'is that
all you've go. chewed up? And wet too,
by thunder! Get out of this--you'Il never
do for this business in the world. There's
blanket ruined 10 all eternity, too, for
you've ra every mouthful, and how can
we make dry paper On, OF wet rags? Come,
move yourself: IN n hurry
Tho victim did not await second invi-
tation. hut went of in all speed Tor he fear
ed he should be- called upon 10 paw for The
blanket. aud flI!e determined hereafter 10
stick to his lawful business and let paper
mills alone. C. Il. l..
A YANKEE IN PAgIs.-Among the com
baianis of tho three DAYS. on the popu
lar side, was n Western Yankee, who fought