The Lancaster gazette. (Lancaster, Ohio) 1846-1852, 1848-04-14
\ 9umorous Sketch
From The Philadelphia Evening Post.
A TEMPERANCE STORY.
BY JOHN SMITH. INDIANA,

BY JOHN SMITH, INDIANA.
have a story laid up in my knowledge
box, that seems to be too good to let sleep
there quietly any lOnger--so ! will tell it,
and rather think it will make some of
the folks laugh. | have laughed over it
to myself, a hundred times.
was enjoying glass of flip. one night
at the little old BLACK Horse" that used
to stand mile out of s., Il hadn't
Joined the great army of teetotalers then)
when neghboring farmer came in, whose
moderation, at least in whiskey toddies,
was not known INTO all men. Hisname
was W. He was quiet sort of
man when sober; lively and chaity nnder
the effect of a single glass; argumenla-
tive and Extensively dogmaiic after the
second toddy, and downright insulting
and quarrelsome aftergetting beyond that
number of drinks. We liked him and
disliked him on these accounts.
On the occasion referred to, he passed
through all these changes, and finally sunk
off to sleep behind the warm stove. Be-
ing in the way, and in danger of tum-
bling on the floor, some of US removed
him to settee. where he slep soundly,
entertaining ms with rather an unmusical
serenade. There were two or three mis-
,chievons fellows about the place, and
one of them suggested THAI it would be
capital fun TO Black VS. face, and
make darkie of him" No sooner said
than done. Some lamp black and oil
were mixed together in an old tin cup,
and a coat of this paint was laid over the
face of W., who. all unconscious of
what had been done, slept on as soundly
and snored as loudly as eyer.
Full two hours passed away before he
awoke. Staggering up 10 the bar, he
called for another glass of whiskey tod
dy. while we made the old bar room ring
again with our peqls Of laughter.
"Wbat are you all laughing att he said
as he became ware that he was the sub.
1ect of merriment, turning his black face
around upon the company.
"Give us Zip Coon, old fellow!" called
out one Of the boys" WHO bad helped
him into his beautiful mask
"No-no-Lucy Long! Give US Lucy
Long" cried another.
Cant you dance Jim Crow9 Try it.
III sing the Wheel about and turn "a
bout, and do jist So Now begin"
And the last speaker commenced sing
ing Jim Crow.
W neither understood or relished
all this. But the more angry aud mysti-
fed he became the louder laughed the
company, and The freer became their
iests. At last, in passion, he swore at
us Justify, aud leaving the bar-room, in
high dndgeon. took his horse from the
stable and rode off.
1t was past II o'clock. The night
was cold and ride of two miles made
W sober enough to understand that
he had been rather drunk, and was still a
good deal "in for it" and that it wouldn't
exactly do for bis wife to see him just as
he was. So he rode on a mile past his
house, and then back again at SLOW lrot,
concluding that by this time the good wo-
man was fast asleep. And SO she was.
He entered the house, crept silently up
stairs, and got quietly into bed, without
his better half being the wiser thereof
On the next morning, Mrs. W
awoke first, But what was her surprise
.&horror,upon rising up, to seeips'ead of
her lawful husband. what she thought a
strapping negIo as black as charcoal, ly-
ing at her side. Her first impulse was
to scream: but her presence of mind, in
this trying position, enabled herto keep
silence. But you may he sure she didn't
remain long in such close contact with
Sir Darkey. Not she! For slipping oni
of bed, quickly, but noiselessly, she gil
ded from the room, and was soon down
stairs in the kitchen. where a stout two
fsted Irish girl was at work preparing
breakfast"
"Oh, dear, Kitty" she exclaimed,
painting for breath, and looking as pale as
q ghost:-"Have you seen anything OF
Mr.. VT this morningP
"Och! no, and dear ma'am. But what
ails vel Y'r as white as a shatel
"Oh, mercy! Kitty. You wouldn't be
lieve it, but there's a monstrous negro in
my room"
"Gracious mel Mrs. W.. a nagerl
"Yes, indeed Kitty" returned Mrs
W, trembling in every limb. "And
worse and worse. he's in my bedl just
woke, and thought it was Mr. W
by nv side. But when | looked over
saw, instead Of his face, one as black az
the stove. Mercy on me! was fright
ened almost to DEATH"
." ais he aslape2" asked Kitty: - --' = !, . =
"Yes, sound asleep aud snoring. Oh
dear! what shall we dot Where in th'
world is Mr.. W. I'm afraid this ne
gro has murdered him."
"Och! the blasted murtherin thafe!'
exclaimed Kitty, her organ Of combative