Jeffersonian Republican. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1840-1853, 1848-06-29
Sally Sly & Jenny M'Kean.
HUMOROUS REPORT ON BUTTER

conveyed III ~, tOiO Win Ilcn vein OI numOb
ihs, is capital. 1, is from the pen Of S. B. Lii.
lie Of the Merrimac Agricultural Society:
1.-The ben6cence of the Creator is manifest
in SO dsposing Of our tastes. aud so adopting
these TO thevarielies with which they are sound.
ed, aslo make life scene of enjoyment In
stead of burden. |, might have been that ne
nessary food would have been nosome, as lis
sometimes TO the deceased stomach, had it not
pleased the Creator 10 order it olherwise.-
Bread is The staff of Life, but butter is given 10
make it slip down easier and with better rel
ish. But It depends something on who makes
The butter whether Il answers This purpose
Butter made in Joe Bunker's family needs TO
be eaten IN The dark then to make il pass
well. one or two other senses should be laid
aside, While that made by his brother Jona-
than may be eaten in the full blaze of noon you
would wish that your neck was as long again
that you might have the pleasurable sensation
Of swallowing it prolonged. Perhaps bit of
history of their beller halves will explain the
whole matter.
"Joe's wife was Sally Sly-when a small
girl she was sly-she would no, half wash the
milk pail and sly il away and let it sour. She
was sly at school & did not half ge. her les
sons, but would have her book in sigh, when re-
citing; but as she grew older she learned that
To get well married she mus, appear well, so
she bent all her cunning 10 get superficial ed.
ucaiion in everything, from roasting a. potato
TO playing the piano. Poor Joe fell in love
with her, and love has no eyes--so he married
her But soon. after he entered on housekeep-
ing, his eye sight came, and he saw his fix ,ha,
for for frt,a
philosopher he determined 10 endure what he
could not avoid or cure, aud 60, along toleraby
well, only when il came TO her buer-for his
moiher was real butter maker. Every time
he .aw or tasted of SaIIy's butter .he fel. the
horrors. her maEner. of making butter was some
what as follows: she thinks 1t Of no copse.
quence whether the milk pail is swee, or sour
sels The milk in warm room, because il is
easier than TO go in The cellar. and if some dir,
should blow into the pans she thinks every man
must '' eat peck of dirt," and no place will il
slip down easier than in bu,ler--she lets the
cream pots be open and when she churns, for.
gets the poke; leaves The cream nearly al blood
hea, that il may come quick. When she takes
II ou, of the churn she picks out the bodies of
all flies and spiders--the legs and wings are
SO small they can be swallowed She works
ou, half the bu,termlk and sets it away in a
warm place for use Poor Joe has seen so
much butter OF this kind that he declares butter
does not agree with his health. and will not
taste il. Yel his wife wonders why he. does
not try il, and marvels that he does not keep
dairy and make butter for market"
g Jonathan was younger brother Of Joe, and
had occasion 10 ca. al his broiher's enough to
Know shy he could mol cal butter. and he de.
clated he never would marry without knowing
whal his bread was but,ered wnh Following
,hesbent Of his fancy, he made several attempts
a. matrmony. and Julia Jumper almost caugh,
him, for there was always good butter on the
lable for tea, bur he was determined 10 know
who made H. On inquiry, she says. /" La me !!
mother makes The butler; lake lessons on The
piano." q Well," says Jonathan, I" | want a
wIie ,ha, takes lessons on The churn---I shall
look further :" A(,er several unsuccessful al.
tempts. and jus. ready 10 despair. he started in
pursuit OF stray cattle. before breakfast, and
wandering across The Iores, inlo The corner Of
The mex. town, and weary and hungry, be called
al decen. looking house and asked for some
| refreshmenl, for the family were wha. is called
Scoich IrIsh---In religion Presbyterian and in
hospitality boundless.
/ Here he found the butter exactly right...
slough The weather was hot il KEEP, its shape
as well as beeswax. He catechised the old
lady about her housewifery.-for the bread was
as right as The butter The old lady said her
health was feeble, and she could do but l.lIe
and that Jenny had tho whole management
he made some roundabout questions concern
ing Jenny and learned that she was q hearty.
black haired, black eyed lass. Of about Two AID
twen'y had never seen piano nor attended
bait knew the assembIy's ca,echism ;
could sing old Hundred 10 charm---spn fax
and darn stockings, and was then gone TO lown
with burer He fingered, bu, she was delayed
and when his excuses for staying were exhaust.
ed, he started. He could no, ge.-,be good but
her Out Of his mind, and how i. happened know
not. He soon found his way there again. and
ihe resdlt of his adventure was be .oor made a
J wife Of Jane M'kesn. And now one lump Of
/ tl,s butter Is worth more than Joes' would make
! in month. There's 90 trouble in, going 10
mstket-lhe keepers Of gen.eeI boarding houses
in The neighboring village send and take IL a!
f'Les higties. marke, price.