New-York daily tribune. [volume] (New-York [N.Y.]) 1842-1866, 1848-08-10
NEw-YoRK IN SLICES.
sIiee xu....THr Mock AucrioN'.

o.
that thew were genuine he must have known that they
were stolen TO be sold at any such price and he has
allowed his appetite for sharp bargain to get the up
per hand Of his honesty well his usual shrewdnes
We tell him plainly then that his intention to avail
himself Of somebody's being robbed If he has 90. bit
ten who is to pity him
Notwithstanding that we do mt sympathize with Mr..
Greenhom. condemn the viany Of Mr.. Funk, as
roundy as the roundest He is infinitely less respecta
BILE than the burglar OF the backleg, and deserves
scverer punishment There are rascates enough,
Heaven knows trade in the best Of streets and under
the most vrtuous auspices From the heavy importer
Of watersreet TO the three penny retailer on the cor
ner lies are told every day enough to place anybody
who had a soul in extreme jeopardy. But the Peter
Funk is the sublime of mercantile swinding-ihe re
suit Of the commercial principle carried to its ultmates
The thing he does upon scale Of magnificent false
hood and impotence is done by the dealer in diluted
brandes and damaged calicoes upon smaller scale IN
a more sneakng manner Mr. Funk sells our friend
Greenhorn pinchbeck watch for gold, and real glass
beads Sc, in pewter for diamonds Wel-what then
The respectable house of Virgins & Wrinkle sells us
yes u.s. the vertable writer OF these Slices, catty
box of real Souchong into which has been mixed ten
or dozen pounds of Bohea and basket Of champagne
which they know to be galvanized cider, and which cost
them ten cents gallon. Our wife buys new irock
at Blnkums which she is assured is the real French
chntz warranted fast colors and which, after the fret
washing looks like the fagend of consumptve rain
bow In fact he or she who buys anything anywhere
must keep sharp lookout Let person take thou
sand dollars and start down Broadway buying at every
chop and paying whatever is asked, without question
or hesitation and how much do you think his pur-
chases would be actually worth by the time his money
gave out And yet the hopkeepers are honest and re-
spectable-have pews in church, and have two gowns,
and everything tidy and comfortable
Peter Funk is a gentleman Of extensive connections
and has establishments in various parts Of the City be
side Chatham.st and Lower Broadway. You may find
the red flag of Peter Funsm flying in Pearlst and 9th
er heavy" quarters where it is generally supposed
that transactions bona 6de and dealers responsible
There are pnchbeck and glass beads in many other
kinds Of goods beside watches and breast pins The
country merchant who buys from a sample and takes
the invoice" measurement forged in the back ofce,)
frequently amazed upon opening his bales to discov
that he has bought pig in the pokethat his splen
did English prints have become metamorphosed into
cheap domestics and that his woaddyed French broad
cloth smells horribly of logwood In truth the whole
auction system although there of course individual
exceptions is false aud hollow conducted upon wrong
basis and depending for its profits upon the shrewdnes
of those who sell and the gullibity Of those who buy
The organization of the mock auctions is complete
and each shop is the center OF conspiracy against the
pockets of the community requiring six or eight &C
completes to carry on business successfully Beside
the auctoneer and his clerk there the outsiders
who always attend the sale and bid everything that
is ofered-making bargains by the score each one OF
which according to their story, ought to enrich
~ l.. Il
the counter to act as false bidders. We have
in the mock auction rooms in Broadway within the
last few days whom we have known to be engaged
IN the business for ten years Thy are gen
orally men of middle age and of ho'os' looks
Then there is the respectable jeweler" round the
corner OF across the way whom the doubtful or hest
sng are referred to the commences OF the article
for sale, and who is always ready to give favorable
answer This is DONE too very safely for in the
of gold watch, for instance, the Peter Funk whom
Mr. Greenhorn takes be rival bidder, takes you to
the eweler and exhibits gold watch for his nspec
ton The verdict is of course favorable and on the
way back, the watches dexterously exchanged in
the outside pocket of the Funk and you go on bidding
for what you now suppose you knop to be genuine
lever Tobias make full jeweed. So with the articles
of jewelry-pencils, rings breastpns necklaces, &c
&c. The whole arrangement is perfect, and such an
air OF earnesness and sincerity is preserved by the ac
completes on the outside of the counter that an mex
rerienced stranger cannot fail to be taken in.
But the peculiar feature Of this business is that the
moor dupe never knows hoao many articles he buying
For instance the auconeer holds up card containing
dozen or two of small articles, and asks, "How much
apiece gentlemen for these splendid gold pencilcases
very heavy and warranted eighteen cares The last OF
an immense stock from Broadway establishment just
become bankrupt and sold under the orders OF the
Sheriff How much for these magnificent pencils
breastpins and bracelctsl" The Funks make a small
bid which he receives with virtuous indignation, and
perhaps ventures inquire whether they think the ar
ticles were stolen Upon this another Funk bids high
sum- and the greenhorn begins to think that here is
indeed chance for splendid bargain. At length he
bids and his fate is sealed After playing him little
as Frank Forester would play trout down goes the
hammer and the fortunate purchaser, who suppeseshe
has bid of two dozen articles, is taken into the back
room To settle and receive his goods Here immense
box of all sorts of trash from pair of scissors to
shirtbuton is produced and he learns to his conser
nation that he has purchased eight hundred
pieces at twenty-five cents piece and bill for
couple of hundred dollars presented to him Ii he re-
monstrates the clerk is nexibe and if he attempts to
leave the place he forcibly wiihhelda Funk called
ened with immediate for obtaining goods under
false pretencesn Alarmed and dumbfounded, he pays
over all the money he has about him. and is kindly per
ntted take his purchaseeaying his watch in pledge
that he will return and settle the balance of the bill
With his load OF rubbish tied up in his pocket handker
chief he makes his escape and entering the first jew
elers shop he encounters is politely told, with well
bred shrug pity that his whole cargo MT worth five
dollars But then the lesson he has learned if he only
knows how to profit by it will stand him well in stead
for the money he has thrown away.
Let all strangers remember once for all. that there
no establishment in the City where real watches and
valuable jewelry sold at auction. Such goods have
always nearly fixed and intrinsic value and can |
neither be bought nor sold at any great reduction
from the standard price Whoever offers them thus is
a swndler or a thief Either he has stolen what be
sells or else the articles he offers nothing but paste
and galvanized pewter and are utterly worthless BY
following this plain direction the stranger in Sewiork
will save his money and avoid being obliged to regard
himself as fool and spooney.
If anybody would like to know why these shops are
not suppressed by law. he must ask the proper su
thores IF he can find them II Is of our bust