Anti-slavery bugle. [volume] (New-Lisbon, Ohio) 1845-1861, 1848-12-15


lie. ] had something now to live for. A
new desire for life seemed suddenly to spring
up; the universal boundary Tor human sym
patty included even my wretched self in It's
cheering circle. And all these sensations
were generated by a few kind words.
What a lesson Of love should not this teach
usl How know we, but some trifing sacri-
fee, some little act Of kindness, some, it may
be unconsldered word, may heal a bruised
heart, or cheer a dropping spirit. Never shall
] forget the exquisite delight which ! felt
When first asked TO call and see Mr.. Good
rich and how did ! love him from my very
heart for the pleasure he afforded me in the
knowledge that some one on the broad face
Of the earth cared for me-for me, who had
given myself up as a castaway; who, two
days before, had been friendless in the broad
est Specification of The word, and willing, nay,
wishing TO die. Any man who had suddenly
broke off a habit. such as mine was, may i'm
agine what my sufferings were during the
week which followed my abando ning the use
Of alcohol. Any attempt 10 describe my feel
ings would inevitably fall far short Of the re-
ality, and | shall mention only one or two
circumstances in connection with this event.
ful period of my life.
On the evening of the day following that
OIL hHlCu ! blSuOuf 4 Nobf ohu'b"h 'Ohio
from the shop, with a dreadful feeling Of
some impending calamity haunting me. in
spite Of the encouragement | had received,
the presentiment of coming evil was so strong
that il bowed me to the dust with apprehen-
sion. The unslakable thirst still chung TO
me, and water, instead of allaying il, seem
ed only to increase its intensity. ] feared
another attack Of the delirium tremens, and
rot without reason for, on that very eve
ming, when ] took tho iron pin to screw up
the binding press, 1t seemed to tu'n 10 a
writhing, creeping snake in my hands. J
dropt it in horror. and il was nothing but a
bar of iron! These and similar Illusions
terrified me, and ere long my worst Hppre.
tensions were realized. ] WAS fated to en-
counter one more struggle with my enemy
before ] became free.
Fearful was the struggle. God. in his
mercy, forbid that any other young man
should endure but a tenth part Of the torture
which racked my frame and agonized my
heart. As, in the former attack, horrible
faces glared upon me from the walls-faces
ever changing, and displaying new and still
more horrible features-blsck, bloated in
sects crawling over my face, and myriads of
burning, concenlric rings were revolving in
cessantly. At one moment the chamber APP
Vtdltu 10 Ifu do DlOOus dnu III d WINNING u
was as dark as a charnal house. seemed
to have a knife with hundreds of blades dri-
ven through the flesh of my hands, and all
were so inextricably bent and tangled togeth-
er, that | could not withdraw them for some
time aud when ] did, from my l~acerated
fingers the bloody fbres would stretch out all
quivering with life. After frightful paroxysm
of this kind, ] would start like a maniac from
my bed, and beg for life, life! What l Of
late thought so worthless seemed now to be
Of unappreciated value. ! dreaded to die,
and chung 10 existence, as feeling that my
souls salvation depended on a little more
life. A great portion of this time l spent
alone; no mothers hand was near to wipe
the big drops Of perspiration from my brow.
mo Kind voice cheered me in my solitude.
Alone | encountered all the hosts of demoni-
&c forms which crowded my chamber. No
one witnessed my agonies, or counted my
woes, and yet ! yet recovered how, still
more mysterious was the fac! of my conceal
ing my sulferings from every mortal eye.
Ia about a week, | gained in a great de-
gree, the mastery over my accursed appetite
hut the strife had made me dresdfully weak.
Gradually my health improved, my spirits
recovered ard | ceased to despair. Once more
| was enabled 10 crawl into sunshine but,
Oh how changed! Wan cheeks and hollow
eyes. feeble limbs, and almost powerless
hands, plainly enough indicated that, between
me and death, there had been but a step.