Herald of the times, and Rhode Islander. [volume] (Newport, R.I.) 1846-1849, 1848-12-14

again CVciyn was ioiuSu !" "c' "ca'
4 My father stood at a little distance, hi.
, eyes glistening with delight, for he saw
that his wife had been appreciated by one
of his daughters, aud little dreamed what
dark thoughts dwelt within the bosom ol
his eldest child. Meanwhile thousand
struggling feelings ragged within my soul
wac angry with my sister for having
allowed her prejudices to be snbdued by
what l considered the base arts Of a step
mother, and mortified and indignant that
the latter should thus early have achieved
a victory.
Weeks passed away, and my demean-
OF towards my fathers wife rem aimed
unchanged; but during that period had
felt very miserable. My home seemed
changed in every particular, and my own
position in il was the same no longer
My father was cold to me, for h.. saw and
resented my continued contumacy to-
4 ards his wife. The childen appeared
to love the lady whom they desired to
call by the name Of mother, and felt my
influence over them most painfully dimin-
ished. My stepm',her bore the blame
of everything. and my heart accused her
of insiigating my father to treat me dis
tantly, while her expressed interest in my
iibroihers and sisters | regarded as entire
III assumed to wean their love from me
and centre it upon herself, and this too,
solely for the purpose Of provoking the
| spirit which disdained her power did
no, reflect that while under the influence
of this internal conflict, | no longer took
pains to endear The little ones by sharing
their amusements, that | Withdrew habit.
uaily from the freside group because there
was an addition TO the circle, and that
was invariably reserved, and dull and list
less, when among those had hitherto
watched over with the tenderest devotion.
Evelyn also had become estrangcd from
me. Since the day Of my stepmother's $
arrival, she had gradually grown more
and more languld, aud now she never
\ left her own apartment and the physi-
clan told MS that her life was fast drawing
to its close. Loving her as did, | would
fain have been constantly beside her
couch but another had usurped the OF
flee that should have been nine, and
Though ! visited the sick room frequently,
there was strange reserve between MY
sister and myself. and did not remain
with her long, for was too proud to stay
where my presence seemed nncared for
Evelyn never expressed wish to retain
me near her. But my stepmother was
always there, and oh how my heart wriih-
ed at the belief that Evelyn preferred her
TO the playmate Of her childhood, Yet
no one guessed III what anguish my hours
passed, for | guarded vigiiantly every
look and word, lest by ch~ce she should
learn how deeply was wounded; and
only in the retirement of my own cham
ber did give way to the feelings that
Oppressed me.
Mental suffering at length brought on
illness, and in the delirium of u brain fe-
yer, for lille while l gained c blest fer .
getiulness Of my troubles. When the
crisis Of the fever had gone by, and
lay for hours in sort of stupor. and it
was at this period that | felt a kiss inn
printed on my forehead, and heard a
sweet voice murmur in accents of the
tenderest pity, Poor motherlcss one !"
That remembrance did not leave me al-
ter my entire recovery, but regarded it
as the mere hgment Of disorded brain.
Yet felt the force Of the little sentence
that | was indeed mothsrless; and du-
ring the weary no urs of convalescence,
how eagerly my spirit yearned for moth
er's kind and soothing words. Had my
stepmother then sought my affection by
those gentle offices my ieebleness re-
quired, do not think should have re-
PEELED her. but she seldom entered my
room then, and when she did, it seemed
to be merely to utter a few sentences whose
hollowness imagined saw through aud
cordially detestel. As there was no oh
ject TO be gained by the effort, why should
she care TO trouble herself about me ?
AS by degrees | grew stronger, all idea
Of reconciliation faded from my mind,
and l felt my former anlmosity returning
with greater force than ever.
Zone afternoon shortly after my i'll
ness, had left my own apartment and
was sitting alone in little room adjoin.
ing that my sister occupied, when sudden
Iy the door opened and my stepmother
entered She advanced towards me,
while raised my head and gazed haughti-
Iy and inquirlngly at her, as if to ask the
meaning of the unexpected aud unwel-
come visit
81 wish TO have few moments con-
versation with you she said, and | bow
ed my head in token Of acquiescence.
81 have long desired" she began in
voice of emotion, 'this opportunity Of
speaking with you on subject which has
caused me no inconsidcrable pain. You .
must be aware, Jessie, that have both
noticed aud felt your dislike towards me,
and | fulfil a duty both to myself and you
in striving to discover by ~ha, means l
may lead you to regard me differently
When | married your father. it was with
the determination to look upon his chill
dred as my own and TO leave no effort
untried TO deserve and win their conf
dence. With all but one have succeed I
ed. That exception is yourself aud
have come to make this last endeavor to !,
gain that you have hi,hei,o denied me. |