Jeffersonian Republican. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1840-1853, 1848-07-27
BY JOHN w. OLIVER.

s BY JOHN w. OLIVER. E;t
In quiet village in the sober state of Con.
necilcul. Hourishes Aourishing Division of ,he
Sons of Temperance. Much has been said a:
houi is mysterious mysteries, and many quiz
zlcal story has been told in relation TO the an
.Ics of certain goat, said 10 be connected
thefewirh.
II is said lha, in this quiet village resides, a.
mong others. a cute Yankee, of remarkably
/ ingenious and curious turn of mind, whom for
his resemblance to The Pry family, we shall
name Paul. Now Paul took j. into his busy
noddIe 10 enter The gates of our Order without
riding ahe goat. He therefore looked around
among mankind for green son of Temperance
---and having fixed his mind upon victim, he
starred in p1rsui, and found his man. After
exercising his pumping ingenuity in manner
400 tedious 10 mentlon,' he found himself on
the road home licked TO pieces with the idea
of being in full possession of that mysterious
word which would unlock the Division door and
put him in possession of he open sesame
In the meantime. Paul's design was commu-
nica,ed TO few waggish spirits Of The Division.
and appropriate arrangements were made for
hls reception.
Meeting nigh, came, and after the brothers
had pretty generally assembled, The 0. S. heard
a strange noise at The door, like unto The bleat-
ings of certain animal familiarly called Billy.
The o. S., true 10 his instructions. opened The
door sjar.
BAH said Paul.
Bah. BAH! Bah'.!r returned the O. S.
and open few The door" @H
Paul walked in, looking very knowingly the
while. and took seat among the inflated. The
sham business proceeded lor while as though
L nothing had happened =
Worthy Pairiarch,' al length said a member
in solemn and impressive manner, the person
who last entered. having neglected to turn the
usual somerset and light upon his big loe.-it is
evident to my mind that he has not been in
ita,ed. therefore move that we proceed TO
] put HIM through!
Second The motion" shouted dozen.
Il guess I'd better retire. said Paul rising.
and evidently uneasy guess there must be
some mistake And he went for 10 CO. But
they wouldn't let him.. ~
Any one who once gets in here. must 60
through said blacksmith who stood six feet
wihou. his boots. So just be quiet I'LL we
gerthe goat ready. ~
The door fastened and all hope Of escape
was cut off. Paul lrembled. The blacksmith
aforesaid opened closet, and pulled out sack.
Paul turned white.
Prepare The victim = said The w. P. ".,
Paul sprang 10 his feet, and begged for mer-
cy---' but no mercy there was known He
was hustled into sack iu spite of all the kick
ing resistance he could make. The goat hap
pened to be Out of SORTS that night, and SO an
old wheelbarOw was. substituted. Paul was
rrundled around the room---6rsl backwards and
then forw ards.---over sucks of wood, down
stairs and up stairs. =" ..,, .-
'Bahr said The blacksmith, stopping to blow.
Please LEI me our,' pleaded Paul.
'Can' yet, returned the blacksmith. '.Ain't
reached the falls of Nisgara.--must put you
through The shower bath = Paul wiped away
the peTsplration. -:
Creak, creak, cresk, went the old wheelbar.
row round the room again. Al Paufs earnest
solicitation the shower hath was omitted. He
declared i, would give HIM cold.
Having been Otherwise pu, through Paul
was llberaied---a terrified man. He started for
lawyer for vengeance. But the lawyer iold
him he had better say nothing about is---and be
hnally concluded not TO.
Il SO happened lha, where Paul worked a
number Of girls were employed One day Paul
entered the ladies' department That morn.
ing an Irish girl had been admitted 10 the es-
adjustment, and the .mischevous imps had
wrapped her up in piece Of canvass, and were
wheeling her about the floor.
'Whar are you doingT asked Paul.
, .Biddy's riding the goat archly said the
ringlcader Paul boiled.
The MAJ who rode the goat is well known
ia the villsge-..and is often pointed ou. by the
boys. We rather think the next time Paul
wants to enter secret socisty,' he will 60 in
the iron. way.-.-N. Y. Organ.
II | wan, butter only for my own breakfast.
| lay sheet Of boing paper upos plate, and