Democratic banner., 1848-11-27
die of the week. f,.- 49,. e.I
LATEsT.-VIEHNA.-Afairs in Vienna
are frightful; yon can only get a true mar
ration by the mail.
HIGH, Low, GAME,

HAoAAS Az S.ANIC.
The n. o.. Delta-a paper which can an
P~reciste a guod joke BY a contemporary, or
crack one OF its own, if it ch~ooses--copies
the following into its columns, with the
promise that If any man will read it aloud,
and not laugh, he shall receive that paper
for one year gratis. We think there is lit
lie danger that any body, who is made Of
flesh and blood, will get the Delta so cheap;
at any rate, we are not afraid to offer the
Blade on such terms ankee Blade.
lScene in front of a fashionable hotel. I
Gentleman, [dismounting from his horse.
'Stabler, acknowledgement my beast by
allowing him thrice to circumambulate
yonder fountain ; that accomplished, TO i'm.
bibe a moderate quantity of aqueous parti-
cles; conduct him then with care to the re-
pnsitory for wearied beasts; and, having
clothed in lustre his dirty skin, by a gentle
application of the vegetable material vul-
carly called straw, suffer him in quiet to
partake food which shall afford n~omishmeni
and to generate repose.' r., Il
Observation-Disclosures sir?'
GemL-'What, sir! Stand we thus like
one who has not reason in Ills soul, while
this poor beast whose every pore'sa fount
of gushing strength, grows ~valetudinsry
meath Sol's depressing rays? Ye volatile
barbarian!'
Stab.-(Laughing still more unrestl ain
edly.)-'l can't understand a word you
say, sir, but s'pose you want your horse
put up, STRIP .-.z ss'
Gtnk--'Stupidity u~uequalled! Land
lord illuminate your censures against the
tardy churl, who thus manifested oppugna-
ton to my desires; and conduct me to Sc
cluded apartments, and bring restorative;
Of the most viviic character, to reinstate
in their former power the varying energies
Iof my exhausted frame?'
LondlOrd.-(Laughin Ill will sir"
GSenk-'Preposterous! And thou, sir,
unite in the disgraceful merriment of your
Iminion! should really surmise myself
the first Of the species you had ever be-
held
Iandord.-(Laughing still more. jim
deed you are, SIR '.- ''s5
GenE-'Terminate this prolix scene, and
'oficiate as my gwideto apartments. At the
hour of dinner summon me if WEAKNESS
should have caused me to recumbent in re-
pose, gently reanimate me with the breath
of a fan!' "1#'#'H ..' ID.
[Scene 2--the dining hall. r.' 10.
Genk-(Seating himself at the table
dinner over-others standing in the room
81 should judge voracity and ignorance the
prevailing characteristics Of this mansion.
| see nothing amid these reeking ruins
worthy the regard of a gentleman's palate.
Waiter, | desire a female fowl, sufficiently
but not ~redundaDtly made edible by fire.
1t is brought Waiter, dissect with care
the component parts; donot violently sepa-I
rate the parts, lest my joints suffer disloca-|
ton from the discordant sound. Il (Iti isl
Waiter, place a tender portion Of
the breast upon my plate, with the neces-
sery accompaniuients.' Ut is done as or
dered, and he commences his dinner. I
IA wag, who with Others had observed
these proceedings, seats himself at the Ia.
bla opposite orr hero.l do a.,
Wdg.-'Vaiter, furnish me with a female|
fowl; be sure of her virginity.' (The
waiter understood the joke, aud does as he's
bid.)
Wdg.-'Vaiter, discover now her com.
ponent parts'' (Itis done.)
Wag.-'Vaiter, divide these parts into
portions suited to my labial capacity
Wdg.-(Opening his mouth, and throw
ing himself back in his chair.) Waiter,
place one Of them within the orifce before
you.' (Our hero begins to understands
the quiz, end is evidently disconcerted.)
Hag.-'Vaiter, wag my jawsp (Amid
rcars Of laughter and curses upon his lips,
our hero rushes from tho room.)
Why snnsdges are put upin Enks.-We
have often wondered why sausages are put
up in links. The secret is out-they are
to prevent their running away.
So intimatss the Albany Knickerbocker,
in relating how an Albanian lost a New
dog. For days and days he
searched high and low, but nothing of LionI
could he yfnd, At last wehinted to him the
proPriety of whistling foF him in front of
some Of our cheap sausage shops. He did
so, and with the happiest results. The ve-
ry first blow he gave, eight ~bolognas, two
head cheeses and eighteen pounds Of links
jumped off the stall. and chased him dewni
the, street as ifa Old Nick was after him.