Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1848-02-17
M / S CE L ]. A N Y.

M > l. T. l. j. A N Z.
A CALCULATING CANADIAN.-There was
Hugo Himmelam, who made his wife dig
potatoes to pay for the marriage license
"Lawyer," be continued, addressing himself
to Barclay,"l must tell you that story OF
Hugo, for it's not bad one; and good sto-
ries, like potatoes, amt as plenty as they
used to be when | was a boy. Hugo is a
neighbor of mine, though considerably old
er than be; and mean man he is too
Well, when he was going to get married to
Gretchen Kolp, he goes down to Parson
Rogers, a, Digby, to get license. ,''Par-
som. says he. "wha.'s The price of license!''
MSix dollars" says he. six dollars :" says
Hugo. "rhat's dreadful sight of money
Couldn't you take no less!" NO." says
he. ..Thal's what they cost me 10 the Sc
cretary's office at Halifax" well, how
much do You ak for publishing in church,
then'?o IN o.hihg," says parson. "Wel!,"
say Hugo, slha.'s SO cheap can't expect
you to give no change back. think Pli
be published. How long does it take ?"-
s.Three Sundays" ..'Three Sundays?o says
Hugo. sWelt, that's long time, to come,
soo.s But three Sundays only make fort
night after all; two for the covers, and one
for the inside like; and six dollars is great
sum Of money for poor man to throw "a
way. ] must wai,'' So off he wenta jog
ging towards home, and looking about as
mean as new-sheared sheep, when all at
once bright though, came into his head,
and back he went, as hard as his horse could
carry him. "Parson,'' says he, "l've chang
ed my mind. Here's the six dollars. III
tie the knot tonight with nay tongue that !
can't undo wilh my teesh.' "Why; what
in nature is the meaning of all this - says
passon. "Why," says Hugo, ''l've been CT
pherihg i, out in my head, and it's cheaper
than publishing bans after all. You see,
sir, IT'S posato-digging time. If wait to be
called in church, her father will have her
work for nothing and, as hands are scarce
and wages high, if ! marry her tonight, she
can begin 10 dig our own Tomorrow, and
that will pay for the license, and just seven
shillings over; for there amt man in the
Clements that can dig and carry as many
bushels in day as Ge,chen can. And be-
sides, fresh wives, like fresh servants, work
like smoke al first bu. they get sarsy and
lazy after while. life in a Colony By
Sam Slick.
CARD TABLE SIGNALs.-Theodore Hook $
code of card-,abIe signals, in his remark
ably pleasant novel of .Gilber. Quincy, is
clever and nigh, be very effeclualIy reduc-
ed to practice. Never" says he, "Iet a
man and wife play together a. whist. They
are family telegraphs, and if they fancy their
looks are watched, they can always COM
municate by words. found out that !
could never win of Smigsmag and his wife
mentioned this one day, and was answer
ed mo, you never can win Of them''-
<'Why - saidI. Because" said my friend,
they have established code" 'Dear me-
said !, signals by looks % "No," said,
he, Shy words" If Mrs. Smigsmag is to
lead, Smagsmag says, Dear, Begin Dear
begins with d, SO does diamond, and out
comes one from the lady. If he has to lead
and she says, S, my love, she wants spade.
Smgsmag and spade begins with the same
letter, and sure enough down comes spade.
'Harriel, my dear, how long you are sorting
your cards'-Mrs. Smigsmag s,umps down
heart, and a gentle come my love on Ell
Their side, produces club"