The Lancaster gazette. (Lancaster, Ohio) 1846-1852, 1848-04-07
Agents for The Lancaster Gazette.
6nmorons 6ketfbes,
Sally Sly and Jenny McKean.
NUMEROUS REPORT ON BUTTER.

NUMEROUS REPORT ON BUTTER.
We copy the following fromthe Farm
er's Monthly Visitor. There is a good
moral conveyed in it, told with rich vein
Of humor that is capital. 1t is from the
pen of S. B. Little, cf the Merrimac IN.
H,) Agricultural Society:
The bene6cence of the Creator is man.
ifeSt in SO disposing our tastes, and so a
dapting these to the varieties with which
we are surrounded. as to make life scene
of enjoyment instead of burden. 1t
might have been that necessary food
would have been noisome,. as it is some
times to the diseased stomach, had it not
have pleased the Creator to have ordered
it otherwise. Bread is the staff of life,
but butter is given to make it slip down
easier, and with better relish. But it
depends something on who makes the
butter whether it answers this purpose.
Butter made in Joe Bunker's family,
needs to be eaten in the dark; then to
make it pass we'll, one or two other sem
ses should be laid aside-while that made
by his brother Jonathan may be eaten in
in the full blaze of noon; you would
wish that your neck was as long again,
that you might have the pleasurable SEN
sation of swallowing prolonged. Per-
haps bit of the history Of their better
halves will explain the whole matter.
Joe's wife was Sally Sly-when a
small girl she was sly-she would not
half wash the milk pail, but sly away
and lei it sour. She was sly at school
and did not half get her lessons, but would
have her book in sight when reciling-
but as she grew older she learned that tc
get well married, she must appear well
and so she bent all her cunning to get Q
superficial education in every thing, from
roasting potatoe to playing the piano
Poor Joe fell in love with her. and love
has no eyes"-so he married her Blu
soon after she entered on housekeeping
his eye sight came, and he saw his fix
that it was "for better or worse;" and he
thought it was all for worse. Like
true philosopher, he concluded to endure
what he could not avoid nor cure, and go
along tolerably we'll only when he cpmt
TO her butter-for his mother was a rea
butter maker. Every time he saw o
tasted ofSally's butter he felt the horrors
Her manner Of making butter was some
what as follows: She thinks it of no con
sequence whether the milk pail is swee
or sour-sets the milk in warm room
because it is easier than TO go into tn
cellar, and if some dirt should blow int
the pans she thinks every man must "ea
apeck of dirt" and in no place will
slip down easier than in buiter-she let
the cream pots be open, and when sh
churns forgets the poke; leaves the crear
nearly at blood heat ihat it may com
quick. When she takes it out of tn
churn she picks out the bodies of all file
and spiders-the legs and wings are $
small they can be swallowed. She work
out half the butter milk and sets it ava
in warm place for use. Poor Joe ha
seen so much butter of this kind that h
declares butter does not agree with h
health, and will not taste it. Yet hi
wife wonders why he does not try it, an
marvels that he does not keep dair,
and make butter for market.
Jonathan was younger brother of Jo'
and he had occasion to eat at his brother
enough to know why he could not e,
butter; and he declared he never woul
marry without knowing what his brea
would be buttered with Following III
bent of his fancy he made several a
tempts at matrimony. and Julia JUMP,
almost caught him--for there was aiwa
good butter on the table at tea, but /
was determined to know who made
On inquiry, she says: "La me! MOTH
makes the butter; take lessons on Il
piano.
"Well," says Jonathan, "[ want wi
that takes lessons on the churn-I shj
look further"
After several unsuccessful attempt
and just ready to despair, he started
pursuit of stray cattle before breakfa'
and wandered through the forest into Il
next town, and weary and hungry, CT
led at decent looking house and ask
for some refreshment which was me
cordially granted, for the family we
what were called Scotch-lrish--in reli
ion Presbyterian, and in hospitality bouu
less.
Here he found the butter exactly rig
though the weather was hot, the b.
ter kept its shape as we'll as bees wax.
He catechised the old lady about
housewifery. for the bread was as ris
as the butter. The old lady said
health was feeble--she could do but
tie, and Jenny had the whole manaJ
ment He made some roundabout ina
ries concerning Jenny. and learned Il
she was hearty, black.eyed lass of
bout two and twenty; had never seen
piano or attended ball, but knew
Assembly's catechism, and could 81