Boon's Lick times. [volume] (Fayette, Mo.) 1840-1848, 1848-06-10
SELF AND PARTNER.

habits assume strictness, begin TO indulge
IN a laxity of dress. and wear ample waist
coats and easy boots. His features and
person betokened the man who knows VIVA,
10 eat drink, and avoid; lives generously,
and al the same takes care Of himself. and
who has been engaged in the cultivation of
Epcurcsn philosophy for some eighteen or
twenty years. In his hale, rudy coun,en-
ance, you could read soundness and stamina
while the "crow's feet" at the angles of his
eyes, minated to you that he was no chick
en-.
Mr.. Crosby possessed a competence, and
a commission in Her Ilajesly's corps of Cen
,emen Pensioners; he lived in chambers
and dined al a club or coffee house. Thus
far in the way Of life had Mr.. Crosby
marched on without impeachment; that is to
say. unmarried. But the period had now
arrived at which it occurred to him that if
he meant 10 marry at all, he had better do
1t. lie did it. Five years afterwards he
was seen in Cork.s,ree,. Burlington Gar.
dens, surveying wis,fully the exterior of the
Blue Posts; IN predlcament, though not in
appearance, resembling the Peri OF The Gate
of Paradise. Ii seemed as though he had
buried himself in wedlock, and now, like
some unquiet ghost. had returned TO visit
The scenes of his former life. He had evi.
IDENTIFY exchanged state of single blessed
ness for the reverse; and he thus related the
story of his griefs, 10 an old acquaintance
who accosted him.
Take my advice, sir; never marry. You
will ask how came TO do sol For the bes,
reason, sir, that man can have for commit.
| finn n o. f,<,I,,h -, ,s,lc
~. sir; there was temper; there were &C.
compartments; and some money. l was
not rash, sir. l looked before eapt-but
sir, l never should have taken the leap. |
did not marryin haste, sir, al,houghI am
rcpentIng at leisure. consulted wlrh my
friends, who agreed that was doing good
thing. dsobliged none of my relatives.
sir, except my nephew, who was my heir
pre-umpilve. was not foolishIy IN love,
sir, either. The case was this: felt tired
of living alone. believed that my lsun-
dress cheated me. was convinced they
stole my tea and sugar. lost several shirts,
and the rest usually came from the wash
without buttons. My fire was frequently
suffered to 60 out; and whan | returned
home wet in the feet, had TO air my own
stockings. Now, sir, 1t struck me that by
marriage, | should avoid these inconven-
ences. had heard much of domestic man.
agemenl; and was induced TO suppose that
1t would provide good dinners at tritling
expense. | expected, also, that should
find my boots better cleaned, my clothes
better brushed, and tho state Of my ward.
robe, in general better attended TO in the
matrimonial state than in that of cehbacy.
| anticipated better ordered breakfast Ia.
ble than what had been accustomed to-
ln short, Sir, looked for ian increase of COM
forts, aud II had not, sir. never should
have changed my condition.
Now. sir, my grocery is not only en-
bezzled, but that by monthly nurse, in ad-
dIlIon 10 The servants, of whom AIN under
The necessity OF keeping Nv }; and my expen-
dlture IN that article has increased ten-iold.
IL Is quite hclIon. sir, that malrImuny il
Advantageous to shirts: mine are as button.
less as ever. The fire in my study is neg.
lec,ed for that in The nursery; and my slip
pers are invariably put out of the way. My
wardrobe is left to regulate itself, The ser.
wants being wholly occupied in dusling car.
pels and scrubblng floors; and once week
the house is turned upside down, nv pa.
=, PSiS oisP'aSSu, anu my "dlhlDH SUCK anC
umbrella mlslald, under the prelehce Of put.
ling things 10 rights. dine. sir. one day
on leg Of mutton, and for half the week
afterwards on the same dish in variou!
forms. l can now appreciate the virtue o
promptilude in walters. know now wha
It was to gel chop cooked al ten minutes
nolice-and let me tell you, sir, there ar,
no such things as chops in wedlock. Ii |.
worse Than useless 10 row my servants. In
stead ofexcning their alacrily, il only elicit,
excuses from Mrs. Crosby. Then with res
pect to my breakfast. My newspaper is in
dispenssble 10 the comfort Of that meal.
, can never read il in quiet; interrupted ever,
moment. as ! am, by some frivolous ques
ton or remark.
"Ihe annoyances arising from my chill
dren, sir, are most intoerable. They ar
: continually crying, and box on the ca
8 only makes thetii yell the louder,-and m
!. wife joins in the concert The best of chi
!. dren are only less noisy and mischievou
than the ordinary run. Blu, all Of them ar
A subject to teelhing, hopping. cough an
) measles. which render their existence mi:
d cry TO themselves and burden TO all 'roun
them, except 10 their mothers and nurse.
e who, really believe, like the trouble whic
S they thus occasion. But their wrelche
: complaints. sir, are not only Troublesome
! but expensive. lam never without doc
tor in the house. Whilst was single ma
l,sr / Il 4