Evansville weekly journal. [volume] (Evansville, Ind.) 184?-18??, 1848-02-24
SHORT
This is my text to ny present discourse:
BY DOW, JR.

R SSSAASN
Mind neither good nor bad, nor right nor wrong,
cut eat your pudding, Tool, and hold your tongue.n
My hearers-there are a great many folks re-
siding here below, who think they know every
thing-know ltall from A to ambersand-when
an tact they don't know enough to restrain their
oral clappers; orin other words to hold their
tongues. If they would use the precautiop to
keep their mouths shut as closely as possible
like a young lady with a set of teeth resembling
a parcel of blue and white beans at the edge OF
a rat hole-they might escape some little morti-
hcatlon. But no, they must jab their jab in.
Dutt-end foremost on every occasion. No mat
ter what topic or whatever the time, they must
have something to say, and be heard; or they
generally halo loud enough to be heard by a
five mile stone, but they are listened to about
as much as the idle wind that continually boo
90 through a sink spout; for where SO many
leaves OF words are found, the apples of good
sense are as scarce as strawberries among clio
yer Still they must jabber still; and if anybody
else attempt to uttera syllable, they exhibit all
the grlmaces and contortions of monkey with
tobacco smoke in his face, and complain that
they can't get a chance to slip a word in edge
wisell Such fools had better turn over and 90
to sleep.
My friends-mind neither what is good nor
bad, nor right nor wrong: butdo what you con
slider to be good and right, and you will escape
the poisoned arrow of SANDER, and the mis-
chiefs of evil doors. Don't complain of the
world or anything therein. 1t was planned,
fashioned, framed, and SETH motion, and look
ed after By an overriding Providence, who sees
that all things are for the best.
The All-wise has so intended it that there
shall be nothing but variety, No two shall
look exactly alike-no two think alike-and
yet every now and then see some silly nincom.
poop start pp like a toadstool from a dungheap,
and attempt to effect that which God himself
doesen't see fit todo; i. e., try TO make every
body think exactly as he does!
o, eat your Johnycate, Josey, and hold your
tongue! for know ye. Mr.. Social Reformer Sim
pleton, member of morals and meddler in mat
ters and things generally,
Whats impossible can't be,
And never, never comes TO pass"
There alwas has been, and always will be,
and 1t is necessary that there always should be,
just a certain amount of vice, crime, immorali-
ty and misery in the world, and all the old
grannies in breeches between here and Bedlam
may perspire through their bootlegs and cry
out: lit ortn't to be SOL" still it is so, and il al
ways will be so, so long as nature produces
flowers of every variety of hue, and noxious
weeds as well as useful plants-so long assome
babies are born white and some black, some
brown, some red, and ONE blue, no, not blue,
but born 10 get blue,-and brethren, So long as
this neutrality-suspicious. globe shall roll upon his
axis, and the planets WGltZ with their sister
planets and their sisters-in- law, in the vast half
of the universe-and until the written parch-
ments of the armament shall have passed away
as a horrible SCROLL say things will remain
pretty much as they are, any how you can fix it.
My dear hearers-it is too much trouble for
some folks to attend to their own business, and
so they take the easier task oflookingafter other
peoples affairs. There are but few folks here
below that live up to the requirements of my
text-which after all. means nothing more nor
less than s'mind your own business You are
commanded to eat your pudding and puta stop
per on your clapper. and advise all of you TO
open your ears and Try the experiment. | Know
a few mental sheep pens with outlets of such
extraordinary dimensions that they would re-
quire a small wagon load of pudding to effect
ually dam them up-mind your own business,
to them, is language of an unknown tongue,
and all my hollering, from my text downward
TO the last word of the last paragraph, will be
as incomprehensible to them, as the sound of a
church bell is to the legitimate occupants of a
hog sty.
Such folks have existed in all communities
since the great clock-work of time began to
work up day and night into hours, minutes and
seconds; and that the somewhat ancient say
ing, that there are black sheep in every flock,
may forever remain true, they will continue
TO exist till division of time is known no
more.
Therefore, my hearers-mind neither good
nor bad, nor right nor wrong-but attend to
your own affairs exclusively, and go on with
psalm-singing. The black sheep of my flock
cannot be improved-bitter experience teaches
me that they are gradually becoming more and
more scabhy-their feeces are SO full of ticks
and burs that they are hardly worth shearing,
and | concluded TO scare them over the outer
stone fence of kingdom come" TO feed on the
nettles and thist1es that spontaneously grow
nowhere. To the rest of my flock | bequeath
a small handful of oft-repeated advice-Iet no
man say to you, eat your pudding, fool, and
hold your tongue. So live and act-so clothe
yourself with the ~virtuous deeds, that you can
take your time to get through the world free
from the dust of reproach, and in a plight to
see company.
Learn wisdom from a flock of geese-they
mind their own business, and as the song has
it seat their grass in peace"-wilh the now
and then exception of an old gander, who is
sure to have something to say to every passer
By, and is sure to receive a kick, or a cut from
an ox-goad, for its pains. Learn wisdom from
the geese, but don't initiate the gander. And
yet every flock has its gander, and every com
munity has its meddlers. Let it be ~indelibly
impressed on your minds, that one meddler in
a small community is sufficient for all the uses
thereof. So mole it be.
The SHAKE AND THE WooDPEcKER.-We
have noticed in many places a very wickedand