Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1848-11-29
"You don't sell lunterns Z"

hundred Of them in my wagon in the
yard"
80! you have, Ell Well you're the
very man we want"
Yes"
Said the Yankee.
1--WE will make up purse Of $50
for you, if you will bamboozie our friend
| D-s."
81 shouldn't wonder if could strike a
! trade with him"
..When will you do, it - ---..----..--
81 rather calculate it can be done to-
morrow"
Very well--if you succeed, the mon
ev is yours"
Twenty dollars were Immediately col
lected and given to the landlord, as an ear
nest to their seriousness. and the party
broke up to meet the next morning. On
the following, our Yankee acquaintance,
who was shrewd, intelligent fellow, put
on gen,eel suit, and after having made 4
good many inquiries respecting the habits,
manners, appearance and residence OF
Mr.. DIS, mounted u horse, and
took round about course for his house,
with the intention of stopping there on his
return, as if just from Philadelphia. AS
good luck would have it, old D. was
standing in from, Of his house, as the Yum
kee approached.
| Sir"
Said the latter. .....-.. ..-...
"Will you be good enough to inform
me how far it is to New Brunswick 7"
1.-Two miles, sir"
Said D..
"And how far to New York :"
! About forty miles by stage.'
| .Are there any tin-smilhs in N. Bruins
wick q
Continued the Yankee.
'Why, yes, there are two or three small
alfairs' ...-...
Il am.sorrv they are so small was in
hope nf@..being able to fill an order
there, which our house has received for
anterns.'
SAID the old fellow quickly taking the
bait, for he had seen three wagons, loaded
with them only the day before.
| Yes
Added the other careess!y.
I'VE have heavy order. and was told
J that the article could be had in New Bruins
wick
You are from Philadelphia then 2
Yes, do business there. You have
most probably heard of our frm-Hype,
Cook. Sage, Donnely & CO..
Il can't say tha, ever heard Of that
firr1-bu, there appears TO be good many
Of YOU
.Oh, yes, i, is large house,
How many lapterns do you Welt T.
Enquired old D..
Three hundred will do
What do you pay hundred =
The Yankee stated sum considerably
over the value of the article.
''Do you wish them delivered in Phlla-
delphia?'
mo, will attend to that"
"Add another dollar to the hundred and
you shall have .hem."
"Agreed."
! Said the Yankee
81 must go ten miles further; l will pay
you for them on my RETURN"
| After some further conversation about
the size. make and quality of the article.
all of which served to impress old D.
with the legitimacy OF the transaction. the
| Yankee returned to town, put on his old
clothes, and otherwise altered his appear
ance. so that he was fully prepared TO su
perintend the sale of his own lanterns
when the old skinflint arrived. In due
T. a.
ern, ond after much screwing. the bargain
was struck-lhe money paid dovn-and
the tin was delivered
A broad grin of satisfaction might have
been observed at this lime on the face of
six or eight of the by-standers, but nothing
was said. The Yankee got full price
for his lanterns, pocketed his $40, and
then started homewards.
Old D. waited all the next day;
and the next day, and the following one.
and two more-but the Philadelphia mer
chant came not. AT length the lanterns
grew hateful in the old mans sight, and
with dozen round oalhs-redec,ing Sc.
verely upon the mercantile community in
general-lbe tin ware was put in the gar
ret. The joke got wind. and soon every
body knew it, and from that day forth the
old miser was known by the cognomen Of
"Old Lantern" Many years afterwards
the old man died, and the handbill that an.
nounced the sale Of his effects, contained
the following Nota Bene:
"Also at the same time and place, three
hundred lanterns, almost as good as new,
which will be sold at a bargain."
A Yard of Pork a neighboring
town, in which they were building rail
road, party of men, who were employed
there, went to the store of a real live Yam
kee, and thinking they would show spec
linen of their wit, one asked for a yard of
pork, whereupon the Yankee deliberately
cut off three pigs feet, and handed them
to the man. Pat, not at first understand
ing the joke, asked; and sure and is that