Litchfield enquirer., 1847-04-01
A Gossip in Trouble.

A dOSSlp III 1rCuDles
 There's gross scandal stirring. The danes of the village will hear and hab ble it. And what will the rector say. IL concerns even the church.-Od Play.
 In the village of Haliowell, Maine, and whose inhabitants, like the good people of Athens, were much given either to tel! or hear some new things lived Squire F., a facetious, good naturcd sort of & body, whose jokes are even yet matter Of village record, and have been retoli through various editions from folio down to duedocimo.
 Aunt Lizzy was Deacon Snipc's wfe's sis,er-a maiden lady of about lifty-shc went to all the meetings kept a regular account of every birth. death and mar> riage, with lhe datss-dOctorcd all the bahips, and knew every yard in the neigh hborhood- showed all of tho young married women how 10 make soap, and if they had bad luck, mado every child in the house si, cress legged unti! the luck changod. In fine, she was a kind of wills lase fncto,um--spen her time in going from house 10 house, grinding out grls' ofs'ander to each as occasion required, bu, always con.ludtd with the way oi ,ran,gresso,s is hara-'roor NJ 8 A or B (asthe case was01 pity her from the bot tom Of my heart -nr some such soothing reflection, Aunt Lizzy was always very fond of asking strangers and others the s,a,o of their minds--how they eni"ycd ,hcir minds, etc. These questions were generally folicwoa by string of scandal which was calculated 10 destroy t':e peace and happiness ot some of her best urighbors and (riends-but >hu, like other narrators of this kind, considered such in,plicctual murder ns either establishing her own fair reputation, or as the only mods of entertaining the village and ,h, >2yrenderiug her own society agree a1.e.
 Ono warm Summers afternoon ns the 'souire was sitting near his office door smoking his pipe, Aun: l.. was passing with great speed. rumlnNiing upon tho news Of ,he day, when the squire hro'' her to, as the sailors snv, by, whats your hurry, aunt Liz! walk in.' The .ld lady, who never wnntrd a second in vi,ation, went into the office. and the fol- owing dialogue commenced.
 Well squire P. I have been thinking this forenoon what a useful man you might be, if you'd only leave off your light conversation, as the good book says, and become serious man, you might be an ornament to both church and state ss our minister says
 Why as to that, Aun; L;zzy. cheer, ful coun,onance consider as the best :n- dex of grateiu! heart-and you know wha, the bible says on that suhjec:- When ye fast, be not us the hypocriies of sad countenance-but anoint thy head and mash fhy face, (Aunt Lizzy began 10 feel for her pockc. handkerchief, for she was a ,akcr of suuf,) that thou appear not unto men 10 fast
 .Now, 'squire-,hat's what l told you sec how you have the seripier on ysur torgue's end-what a usefu! man you migh: be if you'd only be doer as well as Q nearer of the word.'
 tAst that. Aunt Lizzy, don't see as you professors, as you call them. are whi, better ihau am, in private. res ;pect sincere professor as much ss any man-bui I know enough of one of you, church. whom ycu think great deal of 10 know that she is no better than she should be!
 A, these inusndoes, Aunt Lizzy's little black eyes began 10 ,winkle-she sa down beside the squire in order to speak in Ii,lle lower tone of widespread heI handkerchief over her lap md began 10 tap the cover of her snuff in true style and all things being in readiness for | regular seige Of scandlum magnatum, she commenced fire ...
 .Now. squire, want 10 know wha you mean by one ofour church !-1 know who you mean-trollope-I didn't like so many curls about her head, when she told her experience
 The squire finding curiosity was put ting his boots on, had no occasion tO ado spurs to the heels. for the old lady hat