The northern galaxy. [volume] (Middlebury, Vt.) 1844-1848, 1847-03-23
Volume XII.
MISCELLANEOUS.
From the Erening Courier.
MRS. PIMLICOJOUNCE, AND HER
LAZY HUSBAND"

By the Author of"1 Chapter on LOrers,'
".lIr. 7Idymarls Dilemma" &c,
The grand mistake of John Jounce life
was his marrying Miss Eunce Pimlico, and
the grand mistake of Miss Eunce Pimlico
was marrying John Jounce-for thus first
rate old maid and registering old bachelor
were lost 10 society. How in the world it
happened nobody could tell The match
couldn't have been made in heaven, for there
was neither reason, judgement or discrimina-
ton manifested, and nobody on earth ever
dreamed of such a coming together! twas
one of those uuaccountable accidents called
mysterious every body said they
would have "a time of iI''-and then rolled
up The whites oil their eyes toward heaven.
and looked wise. In common every day parl
ance, Mrs Pimlico JouEce was "a regular
frcl"-'a born irOrry-er'-in the language
oflhe club and street John Jouncc was "a
good for nothing fellow "a clever dog He
was easy, she was neasy-he was conlcn-
ted, she ambilious-he, lazy, she smart-he
was extravaganza, she was economical-he
loved sugar, she loved pickIes-he would
drink coffee, she would drink tea-he would
wear new clothes, she prided herself on men
ding old ones-he loved morning nap, she
loved 10 rise betimes-he went for taking the
world and lis concerns comfortably, she went
for taking the world and lis concerns in hand
and reciiying matlers-he took il that men
were lords of creation. she considered it an
understood thing that men were dreadlully
in the wayne liked occasionally 10 stretch
out his legs before his fircsidc, while she tho1
that if The lords of creation wouldn't stay out
doors and enjoy creation, il was incumbent
on them TO place their corporeOsities in rs
snug ana compact 4 position us possible.
Luckily, they had no children and plenty Of
money, else The "time they had of il'' would
have been worse.
What sort of time was il? Why, il you
had only seen Them walk together, you could
have told in Il minute. He took short quick
steps. with occasionally Il long one, felt oblig
ed TO hit every posi- by the road side with his
cane, swing every chain fence, stop everybo
dy's dog. aud was evidently under some sort
ofmoral obligation TO kick large sized pebbles
off The gravel path, Turn out his toes 10 match
The angles Of a brick pavement, or 10 Step on
every crack in tagged walk, aand could
see no harm or improperly in whistling in
the street, even if il was Sunday. You could
not get the boy out of him. Counting by win
icI's SHOWS and summers suns he n'as past
forty, but iniccliDgs an1 propensiics he was
con sdcrably under twenty. Mrs. Jounce,
on the contrary, never was girl. She was
orc OF your bern women, who have Ihcirlii
tie heads file with big idea OF responsible
itv, and heir black silk work bags and knit
ling needles always handy; ono of your grand
mo;ncr- children. who readily take TO the rule
and plummci system. Thus from her you'll
I'M, She had very dccorously Kept up forty
l. I,bo,..-,r o,1l n vprV OOoI Sorf Ol he
havior il was, only il d;.l moi cline with Mr..
Jauncc's easy style. When Sic walked, she
took moderate sized, regular. even siti'>.car-
rying the whilcsi of handkcrchiels in one
hand, and placing the other very properly on
her husbands arm. for looks sake. Mrs
Jouncc needed no support That poor han''
often wcnLdown with Il jerk. rs her spouse
would be seized with Il desire 20 dive Inio his
pockeis for Irvine. or nails, or Il siXpcncc, or
a iackknile. Tor his pockets kept as young as
he did. On such occasions our good lady
turned her head neither TO the right hand or
The left, but dcmnrcly walked on. and always
appeared to be thankful when the walk was
over. To be sure they loved each other, but
that they could do if they did not keep step,
vet Just as they walked so they lived. llshe
worried and lretted, he didn'l mind il, and ii
he was careless and undignilied. she prcsen-
ted her own dignity in public-iretted and
worried in private and put things 10 rights
again-instanter.
But they each had their trials. Mr..
LOUNGES was his wife-Mrs. LOUNGES was
her husband. He would call her 'Pimllco,
and his dear little Pinlico, and that before
strangers She would 'Mt. Jounca him.
with ali precision, before the same COMPANY.
as if they had but just been made acquainted.
Then he always spilled his coffee on the Ia
blecloihs, then would laugh and wish all The
| table cloths in the bottom OF the sea. lhls
lnrt Mrs Jounce's feelings for ii sounded as
ii they wanted washng.-Mrs. PimlIco
Jounce prided herself on her well ordered
dinners and admirable roasts, but Mr.. Jounce
| was no carver; she told him he always spoIli
| all by his clumsy dividing ofJoints; then ne
| laughed and begged her always to have hash
es, or something that could be served with
spoon, and sell the carving knife, winch was
| a poor appreciation ofher skill. Mrs. Jounce
| was partial TO bright poker. .hr. Jonnce
was partial to a well stirred, and continually
stirred fire. Then he had way OF sitting
in chair, and dancing his feet about toes IN
-tocs ouL-toeS eUerg 1rdy-whlch gave Mrs
Jounce the 6dgets. and sometimes he would
use his pocket knife for tooth-plck which
she was singular enough TO think was decl-
dedly vulgar Sometimes he would SIT and
watch heI little straight form. and impertur-
babe counlenauce, as she stitchcd-slItched'
away inGustriously, until he felt as uncomfolt-
able as il he had a straight jacket on himself.
| She had bad habit too, IN his estimation, oil
| hanging up coats and hats, and putting clean
| linen in drawers. these being TO his mind more
conveniently disposed in groups about his
! dressing room. He had even been known TO
| set hs hat down on the tea-tabe amidst he
cakes and jelIies. One of Mrs. JOunce's ways
was to take time by the foreIock in the mat
ter Of decays, Oh the principal of "a stitch in
time One Of Mr.. Jounce's ways was TO let
every thing go without repair until there was
DAVIS work and then do it all together.
These Two WAYS amounted 10 the same thing
in the end but they came to ii by cross roads,
and they ere rough roads for domestic fe-
hcty, not exactly Macadamized highways
The consequence of these trials was that he
never staid in the house if he could help it
and that she never breathed freely only after