Wisconsin herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1846-1849, 1847-03-13
Getting q bill doHsc.

Mr.. Nitghtshade was bv trade an
lnndertaker-in theintersals he amused
himself By bill discounsing.
Mr.. Nightshade had long been in
the habit Of advancing money on the
bills of Lord Augustus. Spruce
Lately. however, his Lordship's bills
had been marked queer in the money
market; so the next time Lord Angus
tus called. Mr.. Nightshade told him "a
midst a storm of suffers, that money
was excessively scarce, never was more
So; that there was great difficulty in
getting his bills; that bis disbursement
lately had been very heavy; in short,
that he was compelled, much as it
pained him, TO refuse his Lordsbip
this once.
Lord Spruce, like man of the
world, said it did not matter. He
would ask his neighbor, Mr.. Eastern
lCoppties, the undertaken, opposite
He knew he would do ii directly; in
fact, he wanted to see him about lit
tie matter, SO he would step over and
ask hrm at once.
"If the amount is not large, ] am
sure my friend Eastern Counties" it
is sure sign if man calls q rival his
friend, that lie hates him, and true e.
nough, Nightshade hated Eastern
Counties with all the animosity Of q
true shopkeeper-"will do it directly. ,
''il's only dirty two hundred, said
his loFdship. in the most contemptous
manner, 'and am going TO give job
worth more than twice the money
You have heard me talk Of Sir Ireder-
lex Bench, who married my sister An
gelna?'
Eyes, my Lord, repeatedly
/ "Well. he broke his neck while out
hunting. yesterday
'sIndced, my Lord. am very sor-
ry to hear it, An nndertakcr's sor-
row is one Of these humbug-eons
things, which must be seen to be fully
appreciated. The nearest approach TO
it is an authors regret at the damning
of friends piece. "You have the
management OF the funeral, ! suppose
my Lord?'
"Yes, every thing is left to me. The
coffin. is to be carried ten miles to the
family vault in the country. / tho't
of yon at first, Niglishade; but you
have no money you say. aud il would
be a most extensive job. Besides, |
i have never given Eastern Counties a
turn yet. He's n worthy, good fellow
and Pm sure directly IN ask him 10
give me the trifle on this little bill, he'll
DO it directly without a moments hem
or ha.'
but shall be too happy, my Lord
TO do anything | can to oblige you.
have just two hundred pounds at my
bankers 70 pay some railway calls
II your Lords ip would only accept
them
"No, no, my dear Nightshaac! It's
very good ofyou, my boy but | would
not pu. YOU 70 the slightest inconven-
fence. You want the money, you
have great difficulty in getting IN your
bills. you say Eastern Counties, Pm
sure, will be too happy.
But ii's no Inconvenience, my
Lord Here, in fact, arc the bank
notes.
II had rather not have them, Night
shade You have some very heavy
disbursements 10 make, and aust need
every penny YOU have. In fact, must
see Eastern Counties about this awful
funeral. ! shall leave it entirely TO
him; he'll not hesitate minute I'm
positive
'tBut. my Lord, there IS no necessi-
ty 10 trouble yourself or Eastern Coun-
ties. Here is the money!
$40! feel a dclicacy in taking il
from you. Money was scarce you
said--sover was more 50. Pray keep
#. Eastern Counties. have no doubt,
can spare four times tie amount
/ "Really. my Lord, beg you viii be
doing me an everlasting favor; shall
never forget it. Here are three hun
bred pounds--l didn't know had so
much money in the housc-you can
have twice as much If you want it. j
shall be hurt ny Lord, if you refuse