The Kalida venture. [volume] (Kalida, Ohio) 1841-1865, 1847-08-03

DICK TROT AND HIS YANKEE
CLOCK.
"Well, sir" said Dick to me one day,
"about five years or better ago, | bought
wooden clock from a Yankee peddler named
Tom Jones, who used to travel throug h this
country, droppin' one at almost every house;
twas the last one he had, and paid him
fifteen dollars ior it. She was perfect GO
er of clock-and then such beauty! ller
little, sqhatty dnmpy figure, dressed out IN
her painted case. Just filled my eye exactly
to a gnat's heel. Isot her on this shelf, so
mil ght always see her. Her little penlum
would swing back'ards and for'ards dlcken
at a proper rate. That she'd roll it, bekln'
day after day, and week after week, dead
pent on keepin' up with the sun, and deter
mined that nary time piece in the settlement
should get ahead of her. She'd dig at
the hours; never stopin' to catch breath, but
list fire away in admirable style. I'd wind
her up of nights, and then 60 10 bed, putin
| every confidence. in her, and bein' perfectly
+ satisfied that she'd do her duty faithfully,
f although wasn't watchin' hers end wouldn't
d let the sun TO be UP before she'd put her hand
: TO the hour ofsunrise And, then, sir, when
I'd be restless and couldn't sleep, or when
i was sick, then what company she was
10 me! TO be sure she couldn't talk to me
y. -iist call me by namo-thv's all, Though
sometimes she'd say Dick so plain
=, I'd look up at her, and almost expect her to
" lead off a regular built chat. Well, Sir she
- - continued to do so for five years, and was my
- 10 hearts delight. In fact, may say that, she
q hlt on longer than that, but twas abou
II that time she began monstrously to resemble
IL III old Dave Wilson's wife-you know how sh'
s was?"
10 "Can't say do, exactly" l..
\ "Why sir; | thought you knowed. OIL
~ =. Dave used to say that his wife was charmi
u cretur, one of the best of women; that h
didn't believe from old mother Eve down t
l. the present generation; better woman eve
~ throwed a petticoat over her head. TO bt
40 40 sure, she had her ways. (Iere Dick snuffied
~, in imitation of old Dave. whom knew yer
.. wel!) She would have her ways and sue
a ways she did have! Well, sir, my cloc
~ cot to be the same way: some of her work
W W got outen fix, and for spite she done jst q
~ ~ She darned pleased Strike! yes, sir she di'
..1 with all dignation! She'd take notion
g" eu bungle off sometimes; and she'd ring ON tn
w. wires one hundred and fifty times AT fir
al. a. | was tickled at it, and would set at
10 a laugh at her for bein' such fool as to
h,r' cuttin them extras, what didn't hurt nobot
uS but herself But at last I begun to get tire
"" w. of sich foolery 1t semeed TO me, whetiev
.Ii 'a1i | had tough job before the, and wanted
a1 study il out, or whenever was right sleep
ns "a then she'd pick her chance to come the
w. bio licks. put up with It long time; didr
do nothin' to her; and thot by lettin' b
=, have her fun out, she might get tired OF
aas a. herself after a while. But she didn't; 81
r. IL. still hit on stouter an ever. On last satu
,ho day | went up here to muster, and as
'nJ 'r lers have done on such occasions, tuck ra
'"u :. tber too much ofthe tech-me-lightly. Wh'
~ got hum, thot the best place for me W
~; @ in bed so, to sleep off the boozy,l pulls
";n .S and eits in bed; but no sooner did my ne
hm, M tech the piller than up starts the clock
!, ' = ch-r-ing! determined to put stop 70 =,
~ Esech capers that that night. lgot up, load
~ o,r nv old musket, tuck cheer, and sot do'
rew right afore her.
'n ON, aNow, old lady," sez I, 'yer arter
on spite game agin, are yez--Just go on ei
GET like i. but dar' to strike hundred this tn
res and ding me if ye don't ketch it?
hv threat didn't skeer her one bit; she strl
He away, 'peared like livelier than ever:
n a went so peny, she soon got up to ninety
,ain. nety-one-two,,-'Ilre --lourr7five7-s' ;
! to to Il see ye gwyin' it, sez l, and cocks
,utb ol musket- ch-rr-ring-l puts II to
with shoulder -ch-r-r-ring--I takes my sigh
ID is ch-r-r-ring-s lays my finger on the tr'gg
,self ch.r.r-ring, sez she, stou'er an ever,
was starting with another ch.r-r-.whe
flames away, and in half a seckln, finds
B in self flat on my back, in the middle OF
will floor. 80, =,
e as "As picked myselfup, heard the oic lc
dy still goin' it; and darn me II sne o'