Wilmington journal. [volume] (Wilmington, N.C.) 1844-1895, 1847-10-22

Hon. Mr.. P,pkin No,red imself-Bill Pip
kin hadn't been married very long, and hadn't
quite got out of the habit Of takin' little punch
drlnkn' froiics with his old friends on per-
ticker occasions. He was Illustrate at ma
king excuses for stayin' out at night now and
then-he was terribly pressed with business,
and as he tuck monstrous good care never to
come home crosslegged, his wife nevet sus-
pected nothin', and all went off fust rate. One
night Bill got rather morn he could carry
straight, but he didn't find it out till he was
on his way hyme. He wouldn't hare Susan
know he was in such sitewation not for the
world, and he began thihkin', as well as he
could, with his head spinnin' round so, what
was best TO keep her from fndin' him out.
Hic-l-i've got it 'Zackly,' ses he
Hic, Su-Su- Sasan knows Pm hc terribly
fond of m-m-mllk, and hic sh-sh-she'll nevet
sus- suspect nothin', poor gall
Home he went, practisin' strait walkin' all
the way, and studyin' over in his mind how
would he talk strait; so Susan wouldn't find
him out
When he found the latch, which was on
the wrong side of the door, what opened the
wrong way too, he felt round in the dark for
more doors than was ever in the house before,
and got into ever so many curious shaped
rooms, till he found the pantry whar he spec
ted TO find some milk. He didn't have no We
ry clear idee as to whar it ought TO be so, at.
ter feelin' about in every place but the right
one, he cum to the conclusion to go up to his
room and AK his wife whar il was The
stairs seemed to be turned up side down, and
the bedroom had changed places with the
cellar-kitchen, but he made out at last to find
the door =
oil r,,,, L..
his speech so he wouldn't make no mistake,
he opened the door and tuck lean agin the
door-post and listened TO hear if his wife was
awake. She was sound asleep.
All the better for that thought he to him.
self
Susan Susan! ses he very low, and
plain.
Eth ? SEES Susan, jest wakin out Of doze
Is that you come home, my dear, so late
- b.
Susan, SUSAN ses Bill, not payin' no at
tention to what she sed, his he'd bein' full of
the milk Susan'
What, my dear'
is there any milk in the house"
Yes, dear-but what in the world
| Susan, Susanr
What, dear"
| 'Whar is the milk "
In the pantry in the dinin' room, dear But
you better cum TO bed, now, it's So
Bill didn't say word, but tuck some terri
BILE long steps in the dark. He found the di-
MIN room and the pantry agn, but he couldn't
find no milk any whar. After tryin' for about
five mnnits, he goes up straight again, and
leanin' against the door TO steady himself,
ax'd his wife again
Susan, Susan ? ses he, very pertickeler.
Oh-what" SEES she, waking up again.
Is there any milk in the house /"
Il told you there was some milk in the pam
try, dear
Down went Bill agin This time he felt
every whar and upset lots of things, maxim a
terrible racket among the crockery, but drat
the drap of milk could he find.
Cuss the milk y SEES he 'whar could they
put it !"
In minnit more he was at the bed room
door agin.
Susan-Susan p ses he.
Susan snuffied snore short off in the mid
die
What " scs she, sort o. cross this time
is there any milk i'll the house,?
Yes, told you
well, whar is it !" ses he
Il told YOU on the shelf-in the pantry-in
the dinin' room y ses Susan, breaking it off
into short mouthfulIs of pretty loud italic
That sort o skeered Bill, and put him off his
guard
well, SUSAN ses he, { is it tied up in any
thing or laying about loose ?
That was enuf-the cat was out of the bag,
and no help for it. Mrs. Pipkin was bright
awake in minute, and the way Bill got a
Caudle that night was enough to sober the
drunkest husband in creation. He never got
corned agan-and it was nore'n year after
afore he could drink milk in his coffee when
Susan was at the table