Martinsburg gazette. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1833-1855, 1847-12-09
NUMBER Il.
BILLY WHITES PRIVATE OPINIONS.
OR. rnE Loerc OF LoarKa.

Poor Billy Whiiel He is as he sagely re-
marks, s.the victim or circumstances" Billy
returned TO New Orleans the other day on the
steamer Fashion, from Vera Cruz. where he
had been employed as a mule-driver. He
had a dollar or two in bis pocket. but soon
after his arrival he found thai his last picaynne
had been spent in groggery. Dragging HIM
self ont from under wood-piIe the next morn
ing after his debauch, he made his way TO the
place where he had spent the last oil his dimes.
HIS hands trembled and his lips twiiched aud
quiyered. and indeed, to use his own eloquent
expression, she had the shakes terribly on to
him" He heckoned the barkeeper aside 10
most my sterious manner, as though he
had something of the utmost importance to
communicate.
s'Look here, old feIler,o said Bill, in sort
of growing whisper, 81 want whiskey tod
dy strong. with leetle peppermint, and
slight shake Of the nutmeg into il but amt
got the first red cent to pay you for H."
'.See that sign there" answered the bar
keeper. pointing 10 an ornamental piece Of ja-
panned tin on which was painted in golden
letiers--'.Cash today and credit Tomorrow"
Billy gave languishng look at the neigh
boring whiskey bottle, and running his hands
into his pan;aloons pockets. he walked slowly
anu Suuiy uut VI Tue SiugStiy fIso tHc Sucu1
Luck, however, did not,lesert Billy for while
passing the corner cab broke down and tho
trunk of the passenger inside fell out. The
gentleman told Billy tina, if he would carry
the trunk TO a ship that he pointed out be
would give him fifty cents. With the alacri-
ty and strength of young giant, Billy should
cred the load, safely deposited il at the APP
pointed place, received his half dollar, and
went on his way as happy rs prince. At
the first grog shop Billy look what he called
an "eye opener" made Of gin and bi,ters,
then ''phlegm splitter" Of rum and water.
and lastly .'nor- wesier," Of raw whiskey.
These litie creaiure-comfurs made him feel
happy, and he went out into the street in
search Of nothing in particular. Billy wan.
dered about all day, calling in at this groggery
and at that, and at night he found himself sit
ting on the edge Of the wharf in front OF the
flathoHt landing. He was in a rather sorrow
ful mood. and thus gave vent to his feelings:
Eyes" said he, with whisper, ''that's
me. Pm jist like that flatboat floating on the
waters-rottn all my tiubers, and nobody 10
break me for fire. wood. That ere old fiat is
like me. too, in another way: IL was very
good boat 10 come down stream with corn.
pork, and all them sorts of vegetables, but
now, when all them's discharged, they don't
care tinker's damn for it! That's my case,
kerzackly--I was very good when listed in
the "mule-Jrivers," but when they discharged
me they said wasn't worth a damn. How
could help il If the darned mules broke out
Of the pen when them tellers, the gruel-killers,
or guerrilas, or some such named feers Gomez
Wasn't il rainn cats'n dogs, and was a
goin TO get soaked in to the skin for the sake Of
a parcel of long cared CRITTERS like mules? /
reckons not, my valiant Captain! Bill White
aini the Teller 10 lower hissplf in that way,
whatever be may be 10 other perticklers
Then, again was courrmar,ialled Did
have any boards Of ossifers to SET on me, and
see who was IN the right? No"
Here Billy gave deep-drawn sigh, wiped
his left eye with the corner Of his jacket, and
proceeded
EITHER me or the mules was right but the
yeller Mexikins took one of us, and the Meri
kans took the other. Then they wouldn't let
me stay TO fight the battles out. Oh, no.
they was jealous OF me, and sent me home to
pine away like dog who's made his dinner
off ola pizened sassenger. Howsomnever, as
once heard Teller say in Fourth OF July
Grafton. Republics is ungraleful az no mis-
take don't know what TO do; Pan too poor
TO work an Pm too proud to beg. I've been
{ III tit WtfhtDust ~ UlttH tndt tHty WUut
send me down any more ; and that's what
calls violation Of freeman's rights
Spose goes on the high way with a big boss.
pistol and demand people TO ''stand and deliv-
err, who's the lawyer as will come forred TO
defend me If AIM got the dunes TO fee him
I'D commit suercide, but what the use OF that?
Ten chances 10 one my body wouldn't be
found. and If ii was, aud an inquest was held
on my smodering remains, what would be
the Consequences Would any Teller write
poetry ON my virtues and my inwallibleness
as a member of socety2 No! al. my epper-
taph would be thai a white teller "was found
in the river wlIh pair of blue cotionade pants,
a check shirt, and pair Of coarse brogans on"
And then. what would the verdict be? Why,
no,hin but "found drownded. WHO'S goin
TO die under sich circumstances 2-Not me,
by -"
"Who's that talking so loud there ~ asked
a night policeman.
at aint mel said Bill, with shudder /;
"its's q gentleman as is list gone under the
wharf there. Pve heared him talkin 10 hisself
for more'n half Of a hour"
The watchman left Billy to his meditutions.