The Somerset herald and farmers' and mechanics' register. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 183?-1852, 1847-07-13
Dick TrOt and his Yankee Clock

Dick TrOt and his Yankee Clock.
"Well, sir,'' said Dick to me one day,
"about five years or better ago, bought a
wooden clock from Yankee pedlar nam
ed Tom Jones, who used TO travel through
this country, droppln' one at almost eve
~ house. Twas the last one he had,
and | paid him fifteen dollars for it. She
was perfect goer of clock-and then
such beauty! Her little, squatty. dunn
py figur' dressed out in her painted case,
Just filled my eye exactly to gnat's heel.
| sot her on the mantle shelf, SO might
alters see her. Her little penjun would
swing back ards and for'ards pickin' at a
proper rate. Thar she'd roll it, pickin'
day after day, and week after week, dead
bent on keepin' up with the sun, and de-
termined that nary time piece in the set
tlement should get ahead Of her. Shed
dig at the hours, never stoppin' to catch
breath, but list firm away in admirable
style. I'd wind her up of nights, and
then go to bed, putin every confidence in
her, and bein' perfectly satisfied that she'd
DO her duly faithfully. although | wasn't
watchin' her, and wouldn't allow the sun
to be up before she'd put her hand 10 the
hour for sunrise. And, then, sir, when
I'd be restless and couldn'ts sleep, or when
| was sick, then what company she was
TO me. To be shure, she couldn't talk to
me-list call me by name-that's all
Though sometimes she'd say Dick SO
plain I'd look up at her, and almost ex-
pect her to lead off regular built chat
Well, sir, she continued TO be good for
FIVE years, and my hearts delight. In
fact, / may say that she hilt no longer
than that, but twas about that time she be-
gun monstrously to exemble old Dave
Wilson'S wife-you know how she was!"
"Cah't say do, exactly"
"Why, sir, / thought you know'd.-
Old Dave used to say that his wife was
-charmin' cretur; one Of the best of wo-
men; that he didn't believe from old Mo-
ther Eve down to the present generation,
a better woman ever throwed petticoat
over her head. To be sure, he said she
had her ways; there Dick snuffied an lml-
tation of old Dave, whom | knew very
well;) she would have her ways and such
WAYS she did have! Well, sir. my clock
got to be the same way; some of her
works got outen fix; and for spite she
done as she blambed pleased. Strike!
yes, sir, she did. like all dignation She'd
take notion to bugle off sometimes, and
ring in on them wires one hundred and
fifty times. At first | was tickled at it.
and would set and laugh at her for bein'
such fool as to be cuttin' UP them eX
trays, what didn't hurt nobody but her.
self. But at last begun to get tired of
such foolery. 1t seemed TO me, whenev-
er had tough Job before me. and want
ed to study il out, or when | was right
sleepy, then she'd pick her chance to
come them big licks. / put up with it a
long time: didn't do nothing to her; ard
thort by letting her have her fun out, she
might get tired of it herself, after awhile.
But she didn't; she still hilt on stouter an
ever. On last Saturday, went up here
TO muster, an as alters have done on such |
occasions, tuck ray:her too much of the
tech-me-lightly. When | got hum,
thort the best place for me was in bed.
SO, to sleep off the boozy. pulls off and |
gets IN bed, but no sooner did my head !
tech the pillar than up starts the clock !
ch-r-r-rlng. determined to put stop
to any such capers that night. got up 1
loaded my old musket. tuck a cheer and
sct down right atore her.
Now. old lady," sez |, '.yer arter the |
spite game agin, are We! Jlst 60 on eff
We like it; bat dar' to strike hundred
this time, and ding me ef ye don't ketch
it! Nv threats didn't skeer her one bit:
she struck away, 'peared like liylier than
ever. She went so peariy, she soon got
up 10 OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
----four-hve-six-eI see We gwyin' it,
sez |, and | cocks the old musket--
oil-r-r-rIng-I puts il 10 nay shoulder
.eh-r-F-FiRg-I takes my sight-ch-r-r-ring
- lays my finger on the riggg-
ch-r-r-ring, sez she stouter than ever, and
8ss starting with another eh-r-r--when