Jeffersonian Republican. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1840-1853, 1847-10-21
BY THE ORIGINAL "JAcK DOWNING"

is a humorous account of the trial of one Jane
Andrews, in the olden time, for selling a frkn
of butter which had stones concealed in j. 10
increase the weight. The sketch is in Seba
Smiths racicst style. We drop the prelimna-
ries Of the trial, and come at once 10 the pilh of
it. What can be more graphic than the way
in which Mr. Davis and his wife givetheir evi-
dence
"She pleads not guilty." said the judge !:
" now let The witnesses be sworn. Mr.. Da-
Wis, you take the stand, and tell the court and
jury what you know about this affair"
Mr. Davis was sworn and took The stand.
Whereabouts shall begin :" said he, hesi-
ia,ing, and rubbing his sleeve over his face to
brush away the perspiraton.
"Tel the whole story just as il happened"
said the Judge. :" from first TO last, that is. what
relates to this particular transaction abou. the
firkin of butter"
WELL il was a week ago last Saturday
mornin," said the witness, putting one foot
upon the bench that stood before him, 8" I'D
been down 10 the mill with my wagon, and was
going home, | should say about nine o'clock in
The mornin'; it might be a lille more, and il.
might be lille less, but should say it wasn',
much odds of nine O'Clock judging from my
fecllns, for hadn't been 10 breakfast gen.
orally go to mill before breakfast when | GO,
and commonly gel back about nine o'clock !;
but Judged was abou, half an hour later that
mornin' than common, owing to kind of warm
dispute got into with the miller about slreakin'
the toll dish. told him ne ought to streak II
with straight stick, but he always would take
his hand TO streak with, and always kept the
roundin' side Of his hand up, and that made the
dish little heapin'-"
"Bu, don't see wha, all this has to do with
the tub of butter. Mr.. Davis" said the judge ;
" you must confne yourself 10 the case before
the court: What was this transaction about
the tub of butter :"
"Well was comm along TO it byme hy,"
said the witness.
!" Bu, you must come along to it now" said
The Judge: "rela,e wha, you know about the
case presented by the grand jury, and not talk
about any thing else."
WE'LL" said Davis, "I should judge II was
no, much odds of nile O'Clock, when l came
along up by Mr.. Andrews house, and see Miss
Andrews out 10 the door feeding the chickens ;
and says |, "good mornin', Miss Andrews,
and says she, " good mornin', Mr.. DAVIS" and
saws |, how's all TO home z" and says she,
f" mddlin'; how does your folks do 7"
Blu, that isn't coming 10 the buter," said
the Judge with an air and tone Of great impa-
ience.
Yes tis," said Davis, {" I'm close to the
butter now for then, says |, Miss Andrews
have YOU gol another 6rkin of butter TO sell 2
And says she, "yes.". | said another 6rkin
4 because [ bought one of her last winter, tha
4 weighed about twenty pounds, and it turned
out to be very good frkin of butter, though il
was hard sailed but think that's good faul
in butter it makes it spend better, and like
The taste of it full as well, though my wife
doesn't. Tha, frkin Of butter lasted US"
No matter how long il lasted" said the
iudge. "thats not the frkin with which We
have 10 do now. You must come right dowr
TO the particular frkin that was The cause o
this trial. s.a.ss..a-
"Well, I'm jest agoing to-take hold Of lha
now" SAID Davis . and SO says |, Miss An
drews have you go, another frkin of butter L
sell Z" And says she, (" Yes. | have /" Ane
says | +; " How big is i, :" Says she, Il
weighs sc pounds, and the frkin weighs
pounds, and that leaves 80 pounds OF butter.
land says |, /" How much is il pound !" Say
lshe /" Tenpence" So, after went in. apt
looked a, il, | agreed TO take it. II come L
one pound FIVE, and took out the money ans
paid her, and put the 6rkin in my wagon an'
carried it home.-WeIl, We never mlstrus'e'
there was anything in the butter and we wen
right to using it; guess we had some OF ii Oh
the liable that very night for supper; did no
we, Judy Z" turning TO his wife. 81
Ia" You needn'. ask your wife any questions,
said the Judge. " Tell what you know your
self about the matter, and then she may lei
what she knows about H. ~ ~
.WeH wba, know myself about The butte
is, we eat of H. about week, and then Jud.
4 comes TO me, and says she, Mr.. Davis. tn
!, Grs, Iayin' is all OUT Says |, it can't D.
out so quick, ii aint bu. week since we ha
, H." . w ell lis out, says she. every morse
of il; bu, the Iayin' WASH. more Than hall a
thick as il was in l'o,her frkin.--" Well )" say
r, Judy if the frs, layin' is out. you must di
into The second" So off she went TO getssom
butter for supper, and we was just sei'in
! down 10 the table, and byme by back she comes
all in fusfer. her eyes starting out OF her hea
!. half as big as saucefs, and she sol plate
l,o me table with great slOne in il half as To-