The Arkansas banner., 1847-09-27
"ShOw your Tickets" Rail Road Sketch.
BY SOLITAIRE.


 RGil Road Sketch.
 BY SOLITAIRE. On the rail cars between Albany and Buffalo, th, conductors are frequently changed. during sngi, trip, and as each new one takes charge, he amour ces himself in office by the exclamation-.'Shov | your tickes!"
 On night trip, recently. testy old Yankee wa, one of the passengers, and having exhibited hi, ticket to the first conductor, he carefully placed i in weil-worn pocket book, buttoned it up in tho breast pocket of his coat, pulled his hat tightly his head, and, folding his arms resigned himself tt l the care of Morpheus. His nasal organ had scarce l ly proclaimed him in dreamlad d, before another 1 conductor came along, with-"Show your tickets' The old Yankee awoke with saort and having l been made conscious of what was wanted, he ex. claimed
 .'I reckon you don't want tew be seein' it all the | time, dew you :''
 "once will do me, sir" says the conductor.
 'Well, yoH hey seen it that oiin, replied the old | gent, "so you kin pass on."
 The conductor insisted upon looking at it. and tue disturbed passenger unbuttoned his coat unstrapped the old pocket-b book, handed out the ticket and the conductor passed by.
 "Them fpllars air mity afread of gettin' chissel- ed, said he, as, placing his ticket in his vest poek- 1 et, he again resigned himself 10 sleep 1 The conductor, thinking he had missed some oi the passe ngeTs, came back again, presently, and | asked 10 see the tickets. What, again." exclaimed inc old man; "well, l SNOW, you are the most peskied bother I've ever seed. Jest take good look now, and hey done. '' 1 The conductor passed on again, and the old man stuck his ticket in his hat band and this time got 1 fairly asleep. The motion of the cars in a short
 time loosened his hat, and fell off, which seepIess wag in the cars perceiving, he picked up the con ductors aIap and approaching the old gent, shout ed in his ear--'' Shote yoT Hckeis!" .'Patience massy." says the old man, "ef here ain1 anuther of these ticket felars," and then he pulled out his pocket book, searched it. put il back felt in his vest pocket but in yain.N |" You've got it," says he, "l gin 1t tew you, know" Here he recollected sticking it in his hat band, and now commenced search for his head piece. The hat amid the shutling of the passengers feet had been kicked under several different seats. After busy seaich of some minutes, he thought he perceived Il beneath fat old ladys seat In reaching for it, he awoke her.
 | "what do you want!" she inquired, snappishly, as even the most amiable old lady would do, when awakened out of a sound sleep. I'm ony reachin' for my hat, marm," says he it's got under your seat" '.I tell you 'taint.' says she. That's nice ex- cuse to be coming feeling around body with, when they are asleep I'll tell the agent, See if don't Why, good gracious, marm." says he, "you needn't be afraid, wouldn't dream of tec in you! "You mightn dream ol doing so, said she, "bui | you aih't bt too good 10, I'll be bound-coming waking people up in the middle of the night. when they're alone, (there fifty in the car,) talking about hat-why don't yon git your hat, if it's there, and go away; but tell you it 'tant there, now, and that is enough think, for any reasonable person--always disturbing people this way--why don't you fdke it, say; | Thus commanded, the distressed old gent reach ed under the seat at the daTklooking object, which he fancied his hat, and the old ladys small pet dog. which he caught hold of by the neck. seized hin in turn by the fingers, with wOagh 'Ois-dh" cnss the consarned thing" exclaimed he, "why it's live varmint."
 .'NoB says the old lady, l reckon yon satisfi- ed that t ant the kind of hat you are looking for, and you go somewhere else and search for your old hat
 A jolt of the cars here nearly threw him into her lap, on which she gave slight scream, and called for protection.
 ''Perhaps this is your hat. sir said the wag who was peIsonating the conductor, at the same time handing him his chapeau, with the ticket safe in the hat-band With an exclamation pleasure he seiz- ed 1t.
 "Here take the consumed ticket. will you ," he exclaimed handing u out promlscuouslyi but every body refused.
 s!Won't nobody hey t?'' he inquired
 ''I VOW tew gracious l won't carry fl anuther minit.'
 "Shotc your tekets." exclaimed the conductor, en- tering, to which he added-"We are at Auburn, gentlemen"
 Here, take it." says the old Yankee. in high state of excitement; d jest ruther be locked upi your dod-rotted jail here than travel by night on these waggins. mans eternally showin' his tick. et--runnin agin cross dogs. or, what's an all-hfed sight wuss. cross old wimin''
 As he leaped from the cars his waggIsh tormentol shouted after him, "show your tickets l'' "Darn your tickets. and the hull biln' on you, he shouted back, as, making tracts for the hotel, he disappeared in the darkness.--St. Louis RereIHe.