The Davenport gazette. [volume] (Davenport, Scott Co., Iowa) 1841-185?, 1847-09-02


mind" said !, ''let those laugh that win; Ill
make profit GU. Of those whiskers, depend
on it,"
For month after this, whenever me,
jerks, he asked rue when intended 10 call
for my whiskers!
"l'Il let you know when want ihem,''
WINS always my answer. .'1'ake good care
Of thcm--ol them occasionally: | shall
call for them one Of these days"
A splendid ball was to DO given to the
members Of the Legislature. lnsccrtained
that jerks wns 10 be one Of the managers
he being a great Ladies' man, ION nc
count Of his whskers, suppose, and il &C.
CURED to me that before the ball took place,
might as we'll call for my whiskers.
One morning met jerks in BARRIERS
shop. lie was adonizing before large
mirror, and combing up my whiskers a. a
devil ola rate.
"Ah! there you arc, old fellow" said he,
speaking TO my reflection in the GLASS;
"Come Tor your whiskers, supposed"
"Oh, no hurry" lrcplied as | set down
for q shave.
"Always ready, you know" he answer
ed, giving final tic 10 his cravat.
"Come 10 think Of it," said, musingly,
as the barber began TO put the Iathei on my
face, 'Pcrhaps now would be rs good n
time as another; you may sit down aud let
the barber try his hand ut the whiskers.,'
"You couldn't wait until tomorrow,
could YOU" he nskcd, hesitatingIy.---
"There's ball tonight, you know"
ITO bc sure there is, and ! think you
ought to 60 with clean face; at all events
| don't zee why you should expect TO wear
my whiskers to the ball; so sit down."
lie rather sulkily obeyed, and in a few
moments his checks were in perfect foam
Of lathcr. The barber Aourished his rnznr
aud was about to commence operations,
when | suddenly changed my mind!
"Stop, MIR. Barber" said; "you ncedh',
shave off those whskers just yet" So he
quietly put up bis razor, while jerks start
ed up from the chnir in something very
much resembling a passion.
"This is triflngm he exclaimed. "You
have claimed your whiskers-take them"
~ believe man has right TO do as he
pleases with his own property remarked
and left jerks washing his luce.
At dinner that day the conversation turn
ed upon tho whiskcr affair. Il seems the
whole town Ind got wind Of il, and jerks
could not walk tho streets without the re-
mark being continually made by the boys
"1here goes the man rith Old Sors rhis-
kers." And they had grown TO m cnor-
nous size, for he dared not trim them. In
short becnme convinced jerks was wait
ing very impaticntly for me to assert my
rights in the property. Il happened that
several Of the party were sitting op-
posi.e me at dinner who were present when
the singular bargain was made, and they
all urged me to take the uhiskcrs that very
day, and thus compe! jerks to 60 to the
ball whiskcrlcss, or stay home. agreed
with them NJ it ras about time TO reap my
crop, and promised that if they would NIL
meet mo at the brokers' shop where the
purchase had been made, would make a
call on jerks that evening after he had
dressed for the ball. All promised to be
present At the proposed sharing operation
in the brokers office, and sent for jerks
and the barber. On the appearance Of
jerks il was evident that he was much
vexed at the sudden call upon him, and his
vexation was certainly not lessened when
he saw the brokers Office was filled to over.
flowing by spectators anxious TO behold the
barbnrous proceeding.
"Come DO il a hurry" he said, as he
took sent, and leaned his head Tor support
against the counter, II cant stay here long
several ladies' are waiting for me to escort
them to the ball"
"True, very truc--you are one Of the
manngcrs-I rccollcct. Mr.. Barber don't
detnin the genlIcman-got to work at once"
The lnthcring was soon over, and with
about three strokes Of tho razor, one side ol
his face was deprived ofits ornament.
sCone, come" said jerks, apush ahead
--thero is no time 10 be lost--let the gen.
tlernan have his whiskers-.he is impa-
ticnt."
"Not At ALL" replied coolly, "l'm in no
sort ola hurry, mysclf--and now ! think
orit, a. your time must DO precious at this
particular time, several ladies being in wait
ing for you to escort them to the ball, be-
lievc l'u not take the other rkiskcr to.
night"
A loud hugh from the by-standers and a
glance in the mirror caused jerks to open
his eyes to the ludicrous appearance be cut
with his single whisker. and he began to
insist upon my taking tie sckolc Of prop
crty! But all wouldn't do. had right
to take il when chose-I s0as not Obliged
to take all at once; and chose 10 take but
half At that particular period-indesd ! in
timated to him very plainly that | wss
not Ruay to be very hard creditor; and
that If he "bchaved HIMSELF" perhaps