Portage sentinel. [volume] (Ravenna, Ohio) 1845-1854, 1847-01-13
Punchiana.
TIE ENGLISH IN LITTLE.-BY GEN. TOM THUMB,
Tom Thumb goes to the Pazace-the
"Back-stGirs"-the Ma;ds-oE f. Honor.


Tom Thumb goes to the Pazace-tht
"Bach-stairs"-the Maids-ot Honor.
II don't much like going to the palace ur
the back-stairs," said Governor Barnum.
Shouldn't much like Congress to know it.
'Tisnt doing the thing by the star-spangled
banner. However, just to see what crown
ed heads are made Of, We'll co.
"In COURSE" said /, for already | felt
my teeth in the royal mullins. "In course"
Barnum set down, and writ short note
to the queen, civilly telling her, that as we
had no other engagement for that night,
we'd como. Barnum was going to seal the
letter with wax.
"Governor," says I, 'no wax; think of
the independence Of the model republic,
and seal with wafer"
Well, at seven o'clock--for the queen
dined very early that day to see us-we
drove from our private lodgings in Grafton
street to Buckingham palace. We took
nothing more than cab, to show American
independence.
"If Mrs. Victoria,' said Barnum to me,
chad asked US in at the front-gate, where
the flag is flying, we'd have gone, General,
in coach-and-six. AS it is, we'll match
the back stairs with cab"
Well, we druy up, and hadn't need to
ring the bell; for the door was opened in a
minute, and dozen critturs' in crimson
with railroads Of gold running up and
down their coats, and their heads as i'll
Of
watin' for us. | hadn't then time to make
a meditation, or I should have said some
thing about happy Columbia, where our
helps are free citizens, and not tattooed by
the tailors, as they are among the British
ers. However, did say to Gov. Barnum
very softly, "I'd rather be Red Man than
Man in Crimson Whereupon the
governor halcshut his eye, like slit in
money box, and held up his finger.
General, this is the back-stairs, said one
of the helps in crimson.
Perhaps, my countrymen-for | write
to Americans-you may have heard Of the
back-stairs Of palaces. You never saw such
q thing, and for the sake of our happy re.
public hope you never will. At Washing
ton there is no back-stairs. When we want
Mr.. Polk, we do MT stand knocking at the
door; but just turn the handle and walk in
to the drawing-room-and ifhe's not there,
into any other place in the house; and we
should just like to catch him putting bolt
to any door on the premises. Tisnt so at
the court Of the Britishers.
sThis is the back stairs, said the help
and first, to begin with, they are SO tarna-
ton small, and so cruel crooked, that Pm
certain no really great man could ever go
up and down 'em. Howsomever, the gov
ernor and mounted and mountaineering
ourselves walking up corkscrew--and
we both thought there would be no end to
it. How did pity the poor critturs ofpal-
aces, obliged to run up and down twisting,
twirling, back staircase, fitterer for eels and
snakes to go up and down, and in and out,
much fitterer than for two-legged humans.
Well, at last we got up the back stairs;
and though am lovely small, when I'D
got to the end never did feel littler in my
life. Governor says |, if they don't let
US out at the front gate, shall stay here
for good. There is no back-stairs in free
republic, and my dander is up at the
thoughts on it,
Agin the governor puts up his finger, as
much as to say business Sol says no.
thin, but stands still to get my wind. you
must stay here till Her Majesty shall be
pleased to command your presence said
the help,
was little riled at this, | said nothing.
Well, in o few minutes, what they call q
lord-in-waitin' comes to us, and says we
must follow him. You should have seen
the crittur. He was dressed in Sky-blue
satin coat, with amber colored very smalls,
and a pink waistcoat, with silver periwin-
kles crawling all about it. There was bunch
les Of silk sunfowers and hollyhocks work.
| ed in his skirts, and silk convulyuluses Q
running round his cuffs. He wanted no.