Martinsburg gazette. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1833-1855, 1846-06-25
SHOOTING oNEs GRANDMOTHER.

The above is the English ola very common
expression, that is generally used when any
individual would laugh at another on account
Of some mistake that he may have made, II
commonly falls upon the ear after this manner
that's the time you shot yo,r granny. With
the origin or meaning of this queer expression
we are wholly unacquain,ed, but the idea
which it suggests TO our mind, we will Illus
trate by the following story
Once in the olden times, there lived in the
goodly city OF Cincinnati. certain ancient
gentleman, who was noted for his wealth and
eccentricities. He had beautiful daughter,
the winning of whose heart was the chief am
bition of all the Young men in the country -
Among the many who had never been intro
duced, and therefore only admired her in the
abstract, were couple of Kentucky bloods
from Lexington. They were bosom compsn-
ions, but as fate would have it, both striving
for the same end. viz: an introduction to the
fair unknown. They finally concluded how
ever, that they should become acquainted at
the same time, leaving the more distant future
to the DEGREES of fortune.
In process OF time they made their appear
anee in our city, but as they had brought no
letters with them, and were unacquainted
with the aristocracy, the commencement of
their campaign was gloomy. For few days
their principal amusement was TO walk by the
mansion where resided the Buckeye charmer,
and this they did in the morning, at noon, and
in the quiet evening of every day.
On an occasion it so happened that they
CHANGED to walk within haiIing distance Of
the old gardener of the mansion, who was
busily engaged in trimming some grape vines,
when the idea suddenly entered their noodles
that they might employ his services to advan
tage. Whereupon they jumped over the
fence, and the elder Of the two commenced
the following dialogue:
'.Halloo. old Convey, here is silver dollar,
and now we want you 10 give us helping
hand"
''Well, gentlemen, shall be happy to assist
you; what's II you wantV
eve understand that your master has
very pretty daughter, and we want to become
acquainted with her We are strangers in
the city, and would know how we may be
introduced 2"
'.That's rather puzzling question, young
gentlemen. But hold III give you my advice.
There is a gentleman living at the Broadway
Ho;el who is very intimate in the family, aud
if you will scrape an acquaintance with him,
| doubt not he will be most happy to CRAFTY
your wishes"
.'Thank you, thank you old Convey we stop
at that Hotel. and the game is opening beau
tilully. Good afternoon, john"
A couple of days then passed away, during
which time there had been certain mannuvres
carried on which we will leave to the readers
imagination. The young bloods succeeded in
securing the cooperation of the family friend
whose noble conduct they were constantly
extolling to the skies. The hour for the long
desired introduction finally arrived. With
bows and smiles, and tender speeches, the
Kentucky gentlemen were ushered into the
splendidly furnished parlor of the unknown
nabob. In few moments the wealthy beauty
made her appearance; the the gentlemen Were
introduced by their friend the lady, who was
in great glee received them in the most polite.
manner possible, and the lovers were perfectly
mad with delight. The evening chat was
exceedingly interesting to all concerned, but
was interrupted by the following concluding
scene. The lady, who had left the room for
a moment, presently made her appearance
hanging upon the arm Of an old gentleman,
and as she approached the young Kentuckians,
she tossed over a silver dollar to them and
begged permission to introduce to their ac
quaintance her Father, the old corey and gar
dener. Such is sometimes the end of even
Kentucky chivalry, and one ofthe many modes
in which people occasionally Shoot their
Grand mothers. - Cincinnati Chronicle.