Staunton spectator, and general advertiser. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 183?-1849, 1846-08-13

registered by the recording pen of truth, and deeply
impressed upon his heart. Quick the answering
vow is despatched, and the eye of the fair one
brghtcns, and her cheek acquires deeper glow, as
she breathes prayer for him, who although absent
is present, who though not seen speaks, and whose
fond word conveyed to her by the mysterious pow
or of the chained lightning, she feels assured is the
sentiment OF truth. Nay, the operation is so sim
pie that persons having an alphabet of their own,
may themselves send messages and receive the an
swer. How charming for the lady TO think that
whilst she touches the Geographic key, her lover
receives and reads the intelligence at the other
ton. How many of those ardent vows and little
tendernesses, which even the telegraph man, that
great depository of secrets, ought not to know,
might be received and exchanged. Think of spop-
ping the question by telegraph Suppose that
rushing along the wires. blazing out in stream of
fire, comes the burning declaration See, the
wheel moves, the pens operate, and whzzing Off
the wheels comes the impassioned question What
is 1t! She raises the paper; decyphers the charac-
tiers, and there inscribed with lightning vividncss,
are the words
t'Dearest will you be mne?"
What IS she to do ?-the proper line of conduct
as laid down in sentimental novels is always to
faint when gentleman makes a declaration. But
that Is only when the matter occurs face to face-
here the pepper is thousand miles off. And if she
were to faint, no one would see her but the tele-
graph man, and that would spoil the effect. 1t is
true, the electric announcement is sufficiently shock
ing, but Of necessity her agitaed spirits must be
soohed. So she gently touches the key, off flies
the electric fluid. and the heart of the lover in the
far off country is gladdened with the words:
'Ask my pal"
In practical point of view this method of ma
,rimonial engagement may lead to great results
The Importance of having declaration in writing
will at once be perceived. The reason why SO few
"breach of promse' cases have been brought i'm
lie bn fhn &c
the business has generally been transacted verbally
by the parties themselves, and evidence of that
very essential part of the be Produced
Indeed, such has been the necessity of the thing
that some Of courts have held that if gentle
man paid very slight attention to lady, an engage
ment ought to be presumed. This is only carving
out the popular idea, that if young gentleman
asks once after the health Of young lady, dances
twice with her on the same evening at a fashiona-
BILE ball, calls at her residence thrice and accompa
MES her 10 church four different OCCASIONS moth
ing else than '!match'' can be the result How
ever the result of this important local decision has
been very unhappy. Many of those brilliant young
men called dandieS, who used to fllrt with every
specimen of the fcmenine gender who would per-
init their empty attentions, have suddenly taken a
great dstaSte to female society. The halls which
erst they gaddened with their noble forms, the sa-
looms which they once enlivened with their wit,
hold them no longer. Alas beauty weeps the
faiseness OF tickle man the nice young men who
delighted her will come to see her no more. Hap
PLY this state of affairs cannot last long When
direct popping can be proved, the doctrine of sim
piled popping must vanish. THE reason ceasing
the law itself must cease Let the tickle lover
now endeavor to deny his baseness Lo at JUS
tees forum appears the Tilted beauty the fatal
proof is produced in triumph, there in deep marks
and indentations, done by the sharp points Of the
teiple pens, is the irrefragable evidence that the
false hearted sutton has not come up to the scratch
How terrific It's execution in preventing runaway
matches, and how will future 'intendeds' be amazed
their arrival at the Gretna Green of their seec-
ton, 10 find that their anxious papas have foretold
their coming. And how shocking it will be when
| the Young couple have stood up to have the cere-
mony performed, to learn that stern father has
just forwarded the lightning of his wrath through
the wires, by the horrifc announcement
81 forbid the bans! :"
Public speculation has already been exercised to
solve the question, whether the benefits of this in
vention might be shared by Others than those
each telegraphic terminus. Indeed, some person of
lively imagination has drawn in his minds eve n
ludcrous picture of a perigrinating Yankee pedlar.
travelling towards some commercial mart with a
wagon load of onions, having also 4 portable gal
vanic battery among his other notions, haltinG in
some uninhabited district few miles from the place
OF his destination, detaching the wires, hooking on
his apparatus, and astonishing the town by the in
telllSence that onions mad rZ ten cents bIShel'
the other end of the line then unhitching his bat
terry, readjusting the wires and proceeding on his
way rejoicing, TO reap the pecuniary harvest ri
pened by his 'cuteness. Fortunately Professor
Morse will soon explode such visionary idea
The well known incident that happened to the bird
which perched upon the wires between Washing
ton and Baltimore might be repeated II Mr. Onion.
man should happen to lay hold of the wires while
a communication was passing, he would very pro
baby be electrified In such a manner as TO leave
''no speculation in his eye"