Vermont watchman and State journal. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1836-1883, 1846-05-21

and one thing after another comes I'D nfresb. and
the room IS full of spectres and rubbish, and see
myself on my knees before my father, blushng and
crying as If my heart would break, and almost
afraid to get up or to look him in the face, though
he had only whispered to me, MY child. [ trembie
for you! My dear child, be comfortedp Yes,
see 1t all remember it all 81 want no eyplana-
tons now. My cheeks burn with self-reproach and
shame, and could cast myself at his feet now, and
imPlor9 nm to forgive me again and again for my
childish Jolly and worse than childish deceit and
wickodness; and now would fall a-crying for low
There he sits, Martha--th dear old man9lookinr
happier than ever and younger than he did ten
years ago. And he as younger, Martha, much
younger than he was ten years ago, and will live
longer. Don't laugh at mel mean what | say.
lie has a place Tor everything now, and everything
IN Its place. have left off scribbling poetry. /
wear my shoes up at the heel. have done litter
ing the carpet with scraps of paper half twisted
and lampIightors that wont lie still | keep nv
HAIR brushed smoothly; my morning wrapper is al
ways fit to be seen; and better, perhaps, than all
this, III the eyes of the good old man himself who
has been preaching to me ever since can remem-
Der upon that very subject, | never undertake
anything now without well considering the conse-
quences. | never do anything in a hurry; and
whatever undertake, fnish In word. | am
cured OF my sovenly habits and have no idea of
being married in hurry"
Bravo" said her father "But 20 on-read
that first letter through before you give up"
81 will fathers" and she did And having read
it through, added another page to the volume she
was writing.
"Only to think of it, Martha have lust finish
ed that everlasting letter mentioned a few min
utcs ago Indeed and indeed, am astonished at
myself. But he tells me now that you have never
seen lt-ihat the second, q reasonably short one
was packed off to you instead of it. Nevertheless,
my DEAR you shall see it, and for my sake, too. /
want you to understand my true character. | want
you TO know ond feel how much have altered for
the better.
"To talk about my knowledge of the world, of
myself, and of the human heart, and of being mar
RED, too-dl sixteen! Was there ever anything
half so preposterous? Nay not sixteen--for was
only month or two over fifteen. Oh, Martha,
Martha, if the proof were not staring me in the
face, never could believe that had been so fool
lsh; and even now hardly know whether to laugh
or cry. To fancy myself dying-dyng, too, of a
broken heart martyr to the uncomfortable pre-
Judlces, the deeprooted unconqueraJie preudiceS of
my dear, good father And for whom and for
nhdt? Grant me patience! for good -for-nothing
whppersnapper, without thmbleful of brains, and
hardly wit enough to keep himself out of fire and
water-with nothing on earth to recommend him
but his pretty hands, his beautiful teeth, his be
wtching smile the second hand airs of an ator-
ncys clerk or shop-boy at watcring-place, and
few scraps of poetry, which he never failed to
misapply $50 father says.)
al know not how you may feel, dear Martha,
when reminded of your girlish attachments, the
WITNESSES of your childhood; but as for myself, |
can safely say that never think of the past but
with establishment and shame. Babies are mothers
now, and mothers babies. You leave the little
creatures playing on the steps of the doors you but
turn your head perhaps to what the rest of the
world are doing; and 10 whenyou look again, they
are married, with live babies in their laps! Doyou
wonder 1t makes me sorrowful, bitter, when | hear
the little pert things talking so fppantly about
marriage and courtship, and first love, and all that
FIRST love, indeed! Father says that instead OF a
woman's first love being always her last love, her
last love is always the frt. And | believe him.
Don't you?
"But must finish or you'll be tired to death I
hate long letters and so do you. And all have to
say now, is, that my very blood runs cold and my
flesh creeps when think what an escape / have
had, and of what might have become of me if |
had been allowed TO have my own way at fifteen.
Perhaps, however, | might have been dwarfed by
the companionship of that simpleton Yes, father
was rights the man was both a simpleton and a
coxcomb, and might never have understood or felt
the helpless and hopeless misery of my lot. And
so with you, dear Martha. Instead of being the
women we are, what humble drudges we might
have been Tor the rest of our lives .Now, if we
ever marry, 1t will be with the appreciation of our
understandings as well as with the choice of our
hearts, and not because we are obliged to marry
obliged, mean, by the fear of being overlooked in
the world. Yes, dear, and it will be to MEN, not
dandies; and the business of our lives will not be
to suckle fools and chronicle small beer but to
help one another in shaping the destinies of our
country, in building for the turhest hereafter in
fashioning legislators and statesmen and orators
and mighty men of peace.
Farewell dear Martha.
"Yours, JUIIAn