Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1846-04-23
From the Knickerbocker.
mROTHFRATTONS OF WOMEN"

new correspondent "Joe Miller, Jr.,
discusses to some purpose upon 1.-THE Bo-
therations Of Women;' albeit he has rather
overlaborated his exordium, as well as few
of his illustrations. He contends that there
is no man, bachelor or Benedict, ancient or
juvenile, who can lay his hand on his heart
and say, that since he first wore his long
tailed coat, 'the whole sex, from the 'help'
in his mothers kitchen to the girls at meet
ing, and from them up to the young ladies'
who play the piano. have not been con-
Istantly-going-on, never-ending and out
Iand-out Botheration. We are presented
with a sample of our sex, as an embodied
and fixed fact in this regard. While shay
ing in the morning, his thoughts dwelling
the while upon the young lady with whom
he Arted last evening, he cuts cash in his
cheek at sight of beautiful damsel at an
opposite window, who is watering flowers;
now bending down to pick out decayed
leaf, and now lifting her sweet face, bloom
ing with health, to look after some stray
'morning glory which her small white hand
would strain up in the way it should co.
Breakfast over, he hurries down Broadway
Ito the marts of trade, and scuds like a
businessman through crowded streets, on
'change, and in all public places, his thoughts
distracted and his calculations spoiled by
the apparilion ofsome daughter of Eve, who
has CHANGED to trip past him in all the witch
fery OF Io.,el;oez=, -bodutiIuI aIuca in fare and
figure; her elegant dress swelling round her
person after the latest fashion; with one
hand deposited in her side pocket, her face
cast down, nnocentIy and gracefully suck
| ing the knob on the end of her sun-shade,
or biting with her small white teeth its ivory
ring. Who could resist attractions like these?
In an instant his thoughts steal from art TO
nature. Notes, discounts, purchases and
sales flee from his excited brain. All the
joys of happy home rise before him-a
! fond wife and merry children. And now
fancy runs over space Of twenty years
and in his minds eye he sees long train
ofbeautiful daughters, all walking the streets
:, sucking the knobs of future parasols in the
same graceful manner as the beauty who has
lust passed him. lit is curious fact says
Mr.. Miller, jr, that although the whole sex
have conspired together for one object, they
have yet various methods of operation, al
tending to the same grand result-bothera
ton. There are some of the softer sex, o
an amiable turn of mind, who think that tht
quiet system is the best, and they prefer tc
gain their objects by wheedling. Others
having greater confidence in the assumption
of authority, prefer to adopt commanding
manner, and trust to their powers of com
pulsion. While third class prefer we'll
directed course of teazing, believing tina
continual dropping wears away the hardes
stone. The sex may be divided into thre
grand classes; namely: CoAxERs, DRIVERS
and WORKERS.. Let US glance at them 70
moment in their order.
And first: when did women ever ceas
coAxING! when avill they cease? Coax
why, they coax from the cradle to the grave
lit comes as natural to them as smiling. lr
early life, or mature years, it is all the same
If we are children, it is 'Auh! do noac;
you don't, 'pon my word, Fll never speal
10 you again All, think you might;
think you're mean if you don't. If we arr
children of large growth it is: 'Dea
William, wont you, for mig sake now ?
only once Pm sure you can't refuse thi
one time;' and they languish at you with
their sparkling eyes, and pout out their ruby
lips so prettily, that for the soul of you you
can't refuse: and before you know it, yo'
are completely bamboozled out of your in
dependence and frmness. When Coriolanu
threatened to destroy Rome, who was i
coaxed him to forego his intention, ant
spare the city? Why, the women. Ane
t when Governor Dorr undertook his last re
volution, who was it furnished recruits fo
his valiant army? The Yankee girls. Jus
look at the superiority of female tactics il
. every branch of this elegant accomplish