The Kalida venture. [volume] (Kalida, Ohio) 1841-1865, 1846-07-23


egalg Andsprung to life, respondent roses. y 81
r9la9 And here find thee smiling flower.
sgeli BY ytriendshipplac'd, and guarded well, 4, gza
{, s,&e An emblem OF that magic power, ~
,..,1 Which lays upon the heart a aPell,e
t,,n 4, Pluck'd from thy kindred's lsafy nest,
Thy blushing leaves must soon decay. ggs
SO she who PLACID thee here, whose heart
1@ Is buoyahtnow, must fade away, Jy tRsA
4ef June 9Th, 1916 Purz.
X :------- -.--- F5sl
g AasUCKERp IN AwARM BATH.
: BY EyERPoINT. a se
'% Our friend Louis, of the "Italian Baths"
:, has Just about the incest arrangement in the
II shape of,a bath, that an up-river man can
desire; but sill! he hasn't after all, got the
''latest touch' in the way Of his cocks--and
q, that we found out recently, at the 81. Charles
Hotel, New Orleans. We called to see our
old acquaintance, the Irish la'iy, who does
the towels, &c, and who--niore stretch TO
her girdle---resembcs nothing heshy, in pet
iicoats, exceptit be Eatstaff, disguised as
the fat woman of Brantford, in the "Merry
Wives" We were shown into bathing
room, and there we discovered that an en-
tire new plan Of tletting on'' and 'letting
Off" the water had been introduced. We
saw a shining brass plate, hayingaa ''crankn'
turned, elegantly leuered beneath; SHOT =
'"Cold, ,n'."Waste,p ,,g 4, .l. 81, Z
"D'ye understand the cocks!" said Mrs
McTowcll. s,.Sgsss aasss ", 5,lass i !
"Oh certainly said we.--for the credit
/ ofSt. Louis and IsItalan Baths" The fat
mistress Of The mysteries shut herself Out:
we went to work very confidently at the ham
], dies, heard desperate gwgliag up through
polished graiings in the bottom ofthe s"tub''
prepared ourselves leisurely for the luxury
and--but, we have another story 10 tell about
The matter, and, as that other is rather the
richer Of the two, we shall only say, that,
between "hotn and 'scold," we never were
SO cooked in our life. After desperate
struggle, having managed to get bath on
the S'improved plan" without exposing our
ignorance we left the place, and we're met
at the corner by a rough but estmable friend
from northern Illinois one who has made
q fortune among The "diggins," and who can
afford to take "splurge" every now and
then; so he terms his occasional visits TO the
large cities. \ M g
IA aYou hain't bin akin' bath, hev ye2"
said he. et
ooh, yes,n was She reply. igaaa
"In them there brass-hande consarns?" !.
eyes" said we, "a great improvement.
obvates theinconvenience of the noise and
dash ofthe old plan s8 sB s5d
M We hope that this public confession may
prove some atonement-but we certainly
did talk to our ingenious friend unblushingly..
He roared out laughing, and gave US his own
experience Of the matter. srs6f M
"Old Mrs Cornfed there" said he, "ask-
ed me if aknew the cocks" and ! told her
eyes in course--"course I'd balhed a few,
I'reckon, though not with them kind Of fix
ins-I takes and turns 'eni all, and there was
all kinds of sputter below; and when ready
there wasn't mite of water in the blasted
thing! II Jest nat'rally run out as fast as it
run in, and then knowed what ",oaste,' = ment
Well, / Jest fuses whit first up and then
down, and then one side, and then t'other,
till allowed I'd shut the darn thing up,
caused the Tub began to fill. Well, it kept
.fllin,' and filln,' till Ireconedt il was right,
and in went, one leg, but--hoy Egypt!--
out I,cum agin, howlipg! The cussed, eter-
nal cold one hadn't worked s'pose, and |
explosion! Old seven hundred weight
knocked AT tne uOOr: II 0IiapS W uOHft uli-
derstand the cocks?' ses She. Cock thun-
der! ,Lsung out--butI didn't want her in, to
laugh at me, an 1 want exactly fit to be seen
BY a lady either, If she lpas fat; SO | said il
was norfhin,' and tried again to get the hang
OF the consumed handler-but by this time
the tub was quite full, and bilin,' at that, and
kept turnin and waggin; till Irather guess
Imust have started the cold one without
stopping the hot; and as it was brimming be-
fore, it Jest now nat'raly oyerrun, and per-
haps there wasn't the darndest rise all ovor
that carpet, in about two minutes, that ever
you did see! The cussed cocks tpouldnt
stop none on 'em, and ] was hoppin' about
in the waiter and had to sing out for old fat
ty, any how! I'd rather gin farm, BY thun-
der, but outI sung, and half opened the door,
fore / recollected about my costume. Back
went old fatty against the cer table and
broke a pitcher, and ! hoped on to chair
and into my pants, and then broke for one
Of the opposite bathing rooms, and licked
nyselfin, and told the old woman I'd g,iy her
ten dollars ifshe'd swab up, hand me my shirt,
and say nothin' about II! I don't know
whether she has o. not, but anost die
lafin' spite Of my scalded leg, wheneye I
issIiell you what,r added our Sucker friend,
~ don't mind havin' a laf, but if you GO to
.publishin' this IN the Rereille, III shoot you,
BY gosh!'' ','.' !. "a q. u, '','l
W. he q 10 ass,,re o,,r friends tbat we con-