Southport telegraph. [volume] (Southport, W.T. [i.e. Kenosha, Wis.]) 1840-1850, 1846-03-10
SOUTHPORT WISCONSIN, TUESDAY, MARCH 10 1916
QUEER, QUAINT, AND CURIOUS

QUEER, QUAINT, AND CURIOUS.
think our stove must be foul, as il doe.
not draw well
think II likely saw you put cou
pie OF chickens in the oven just now.
There is chap with hair SO red, tina
when he goes out before day he is ,aker
for sunrise and the cocks begin TO crow.
There are men who are as earnest in
describing tribe, as common people are
in telling of the destruction Of fleets anc
cities. Il is like dlscharg;ng a twenty
FOUNDER TO kill fly.
There is chap ont west with legs SO
crooked that they are often taken for cork
screws.
Can you shoe horsef
No but can shew hens.
Did you draW stort?
| store drawer.
The wind the o.her day mistook large
red nose for chimney and blew it down.
We heard black the other day. who
was discoursing on responsibilities, &c.
Said ne There are very few children who
Will pay for their raising He bad been
oiooSHt vi al me SCUM.
We have heard a great deal of late a.
bout the doctrine Of non-resisfancc, but nev.
er saw the true definition of the term. till
we took up the last Olive Branch. 1t is as
follows:
"What is non-resiitance? To folio \
the devil wherever he chooses to lead you,
without The least holding back or slacken,
ing your pace"
Can you spell four score with two LETT
ters! Yes,-a. t-(eighty.l
EPiTAIH.
Beneath this stone lies Jo:han S: ded
Who sckened suddenly and died did.
YANKEE STORIES New Highlander,
riding in railroad car off Southwest some.
where, seemed particularly disposed to as
tonish the other passengers with tough
stories about Yankeedom. AT last he
mentioned that one of his neighbors own
ed an immense dairy, and made million
pounds of cheese yearly. This story pro.
duced some sensation, and the Yankee,
perceiving that his veracity was in danger
of being questioned, appealed to friend as
follows:
s. True, is MT it, Mr.. p? I speak
of Deacon Brown--you know Deacon
Brown?"
"Ye-e s." replied the friend, srhat is
yes; know Deacon Brown, dor't know
as ever heard precisely how many pound.
Of butter and cheese he makes year, bu
know that he has twelve sawmills that al
60 by buttermilk. "-[Golde Rule.
CONDITION CT THE PEOPLE OF ENeLANI
AND ScoTLAND.-We are indebted to ;
correspondent of the Philadelphia Ledger
writing from Brussels under date Sd ulto.
for the annexed view OF the condition o
the people of England and Scotland.
"Does any one believe that the govern
ment Of the United States would weigh il
the consideration Of English politicians ant
statesmen, il it were the mere representa-
tive Of property and not the embodiment o
the will of the great majority ofthe Amer
can people? II is the increased momentum
on the DISTINGUISHED masses which pres
heavily on all the governments Of Europe
as the means OF Restraining" them be
come dear, and standing armies become
heavy source of taxation. 1t is the starv
ing millions which frIghten the landed ant
commercial ar;stocracy of England; no
that they move them TO pity, but to sense
ofthe impending danger. The starvet
and oppressed people of Europe are the
sullen allies Of the U. States, who, wher
the hour shall have come, will take fear
full revenge on their unnatural oppressors
The English and the French government:
feel that they must prepare for deatt
struggle, and will not venture on a single
step that may hurry the catastrophe.
Can any one suppose that the vices o
poverty ard oppression can much increase
without undermining the government an(
preparing fearful reirbution2 We are
told by Sheriff Alison, that, in Glasgow
there are every Saturday evening about 90.
600 people in a state Of intoxicaiion; ant
that in 1880 there was rum shop for ev
ny twelve houses! In 1910 there was ,
rum shop for every tenth house
The consumption Of alcoholic liquor in L.
%, was, in Sc otland, 2,300,O0u gallons
which enormous sum had. in 1887, increased
10 100000, gallons. In England, The
consumption in 1923, was 100000 gal
Ions, but in 1887 already 7,s53OO0 gal
Ions For this sum, at least, the excise
duty was paid; the amount distilled private
ly fell. in all probability, not far shor
OF IL millions more. The Beer Act oil
1920 brough, into life what are called
the Jerry Shops" where the beer mus
be drunk On the premises. This broughl
the malt liquor home 10 every body, foi
wherever two or three houses now STAND
together in the country, you may almost
be sure that Jerry Shop is among them
OF the Hush Shops" where beer and
spiriiui,ous liquors are sold clandesiinely,
il is impossible 10 determine the number;
bui.shey are. no doubt,'sp:ead far and wide
In Manchester there are over thousand
brandy shops. A
The Temperance Societies have un.
doubleday done much to stop the progress
of the It'd, of Drunkenness hut as long n