Lynchburg Virginian. [volume] (Lynchburg [Va.]) 1829-185?, 1846-04-30
From hs .Ni@ rork Spirit Of he Times.
ETHAN SPIKES FIRST AND LAST VISIT
TO PORTLAND.

portland is the sll dsrndcst place ever seed. wa
down there IN '33, iosee little about my geIu' To III,
Legislator, and such rum time as had, you naye
beer'd tell on Did ever tel. you ABDUL lho cream
scrspe hadl"
We answered in the negative, -nd he resumed.
"Nail, I'd bin down thar. two OF three days, pDkn'
about IN every hole an ho't ID seed every ihng thai
| was Ia be seen Bat one day wards sunduwn was
goin by shop Ia Middle street that looked wonderful y
sllckihere WAS oil mannrr OF candy. an pepperninls.
an jes samins, an what nots at the windows. An
then thar signs with gold letters t. them hangin'
round tho door, tcln how they sold Sofa, Mead, Ice
cream haf. says 10 myself, have hearn good deal
about this ere ice cream, and now III be dafn'd If |
won't see what hey'r made on So put my hands into
Pcebels an walked in kinder careless an gays chap
standing behind tie counter
DO yon keep any Ice creams hefr"
"f sir, - says he, chow mucl'Ii you hsve1o
81 considered mint ont says Ia PM SIR"
The young tellefs face swrcd out. an he liked To
have laughed right out. bal after while he asked
Did you say PIN. sf1o
"sauin" says |, "bu p'rlaps you don't retail SO !
doh'l mind akin quart"
"Nsll. don you think the fellow snnrted right out.
Tell yer what, II made me feel SORT o pstn, an give
him look lhal made him look sober about mint,
an' when clinehed my fst an look 81 at him, (here
Mr. Spike favored US with diablcs expression. y he
hauled In his horns abou, The quickest an' handed me
plat Of tho stuff as peIliie could be- Wall tasted
monihul Of il, an found cool as the north side o.
Bethel hill in January I'd mud 10 spit II out but
just Then seed the cunrcpner chap, prnniug behind
hc door, "hleh rz my spnnk Gall smash II all. thinks
!. ~ not let that white vefed monkey think Pm fear
od-lH eat The dhrncd stuff II II freezes my inards
tell Won what I'd rather skinned a bear Or whipped
Wild cal. but went IL. cat The Whole in about a
minii.
wall, in abeu, quarter ofan hour segan 10 feel
kinder gripy ahnu hefe,' continued Ethan pointing 10
the lower paris OF his stomach, IAN kept leeln' M
better very fast I'LL at last seemed as though I'd pot
steam inge6 sawin' shingles 10 INC. | sot down on
cheer an bent myself up Ike nut cracker. Ihinkn' I'd
grin an bear II but c0ulda set still twisted and
sgsirmed about like nm angle hook ill last
the chap as gin The cream, who had been ookia' on
snckering' saysio me-
"Misier" says he, "what ails You %
"Als mel says l. that ere dnned stuff of You're is
freez.n' up my dayhghs." saysi
"Yeu eat too much, +" says he
IL tell yer didn't" screamed l. Il know what's
nut, and what's too much without astin' YOU an if
YOU dun leave off snickerih' III Spite yuur face
lie eoinned right down. aud said he didn't mean
any hurt, an asked me II hadn't better take some pin
told him ! would. So took purity god horn aud left
the shop.
"Arer got QUIZ continued Ethan, II Eel, better for
mnl' az SO. but ndu gone fur aiufe the ppes tool,
nle san', 81 went into another shop an took some
more gln then SGT dawn on the State House seIs and
there sol an slt but didn't feel darned mite better
begun 10 think was guo 10 kick the bucket an then
thonghl OF my father an mother an of old Spanker
that's s'hets boss an when thought never should
see EN- agln', fairly blubbered. Bat then hap.
penrd to look up an see dzen boys GRIMM an lan'
al me. Tell You what il rio my dander. thai had got
belaw nero. rite up agn, sprune;at 'em like a wild emf
hoowefn ou that I'd ,hske their tarnaI nzzards out an
the way the lille devels scampeed was caution to no
BODY bul alter the 'cliement Of the race was over
le wos agln an couldn't help groanln an screcchin,
as went along.
At last | thought I'd 90 10 The theatre I'm, faro ,
GOV there the grrrs got strong that had 10 90 behind
meetln house aud lay down and holer. Arter while
eot up and went into n shop and eat half dolar's
"a'h o' bed lsters with iour picked cowcumbers aud
Wound up with lass of brandy, Thrnl went into
HE lheaire aud seed The PLAYS bur felt 50 larnay thai
couldn't any iun IN en- Tor | don't think IN. 10
'ers aud euwcnnbefs dun me any good. | sui down
ald down, an Stood up, but still II went on pripe oripe
eoaned all the time an while was obeeped
To srfeech hinder easy. Every stared at me an
somebody called uut"Mrn him uul!p once or twice
ba' at last just as the Niger 0rhello was going 10 pu,
The plller on his wles face 10 smoher her. there cum
such tminge through me, that really thought Was
Dustin up, an yelled out-'Oh deal oh scissors, 81
loud that the old theatre rung aen' Such row Won
never seed the Niger dropped the pcr and Deuternn
omy -~ot what you call her there--hs wife. inmped Of
'he o'n en run while every body IN The theatre was all
~ IN muss. some larfn. some swearn', The nnsbn
ct II was. the police cSed out OF the theatre AM ole
the 10 make myself scaec
"Wall, as didh' Il ell any better wont into , sb,
close by. an called for two assrs Of brandy;
FERN II went home 10 the tavern. | so, down by ia,
wnder and ulcd 10 think felt BETTER hut twas no 90
'hai blessed old lngpe still walloN away inside
50 went out and eat quarters worth of sl.rs ,ne
piece Of minee pie. Then went back and told the ,ay
err Keeper Tell kinder sick an thought I'd lake som,
Easter lie, moulhh of cold and strong glass Of
whiskty punch, an then 90 TO bed"
"But. tell yer what had a rather poor ninht. Some
'lmes was awake growun' an holleru' an when
was asleep, I'D better been awake fer had sich power
'u dreams. Sometimes thought was skinnin' bear
ana 'hen by some hocus nocus 'twoud change To tuhe
Side an The iarnal crtter would be a skinninu me-
| Then, agln, I'D dream that was rolling LOGS will
the boys an Just as In been shuutin' outnow them
here she goesl every thing would g reversed avn
i was log, an the boys pryin' inc up with hei
hand spikes. Then would wake up an screeeh an
oaT-th'n oil 10 sleep agn Ito dream that Spanker ha
run away with me, or that father was whoupu' me, O
some other 2laguy thing Til morGin'
When got up hadn't any appetite Tor breakfast. an
me tavern keeper told that if goin' to carry OF
seteamin an eoanin' as had The night Azure, my room
was peuer Than my company.
l. = haln'l SAID Mr. Spike in conclusion, Il hahn
oeeh 10 Portland SINCE but I'll live To as ola. a. Methu
saier' shall never iuget that ALFRED Ice Cream.n
tOOL.-An Enelishman arrived ia Paris lately h,
'ne iO'uen falmad (says the Conrer) and. getnp ON
y, us wagon took HE way quisy 10 the bureau de re