The New era. [volume] ([Portsmouth, Va.]) 1845-1847, 1846-01-10
JOURNAL OF A HALF DAYS

The weather being fine, my spirits good, and
my pockets low, set out at half past one with
handful of bills. Not bank bills hut newspaper
bills which for the most part far less current.
Made my debut at druggists shop. Sauted
the owner with my best bow and an extra smile
Here is your bill Mr.. Druggist, can you pay it
nowP Is it due already p
Pretty close shaving this
Yes sir, middling close, but knew you were
anxious TO pay it, Two bows. A punctual
man always likes 10 his BILL Another how
Druggist pumps the cash.
Thank you sir Two smiles, another bow
and exit.
Next called upon a tavener How do YOU do
Mr. Landlord?' Two bows. Fine weather
this-beautiiul travelling, must bring great deal
of custom to the hotels Three smiles "A
harvest for the tavern keepers no doubt Musl
ill their pockets with cash. Ahem! can you pay
this little bill, sr2
Heb! what is this for2'
Newspapers sir
What, again you are hard ser.''
Yes, sir, rather hard be -set-obliged to call
often know very well that punctual men like to
their bills often Two smiles and bow
You have fine stand for business here-fine
house good accommOdatons-bar well filled
must make money like DUST
Tavener pulls out his money drawer
There is no man in the world hat gets ready
money like a tavern keeper Two bows and a
smile like of all men in The world to present
him BILL for know he's always ready TO nav
cash. Another bow Some expect a paper
gratis.
He turns over The change, counts ont the cash
receives three bows-and in a tangent Pm off
Next fell in with lawyer. Thought | had
come 10 ask advice Fingers began TO itch for
the fee. Looked wise and prepared TO be ora2
cuIar. Soon found he had got wrong idea Of
the case-especially, when producing The omni-
Gus paper, said here is your bill Mr.. Capias,
you pay it now?' Five bows, each succeed
ing one more profound more than the last
My bill, ha 2 Takes the bill and examines
it with legal particularly. Turns it upside
down. looks into it, upon it, and through it
reads it sidewise, endwise and fronrwse-fnds
it perfect in all its forms. As you say, this is
my bill and Observation-Disclosures
at present--to mOrrow-or next day
Tomorrow never comes, Mr.. Capias, and
next day is still farther off,
PTocrasinaton is the thief Of time
Ahem! Young.
have case TO argue this afternoon
That argues nothing 10 The present case
Another other day
Is bat a fool 10 the present time / delight
to present bill to man OF your profession who
handles the lee before he opens his mouth Law
yers are proverbial for requiring the ready money
and therefore / call upon them with right good
will TO plump the cash--which | am sure Won
will do, Nh. Capas, and not give me cause to
write, judgement reSerred' Three bows and
many smiles.
Pulls ont the money-delivers i-and LEAVING
him to argue his cause, | make my bow, and
exit.
Next looked in upon currier. win you pay
this small bill sir 2
Il will sir Draws out the long leather purse
and counts out the chink.'
Thank you sir, you are the very man like
- lad -
Exit.
Next bore down upon sea captain. have
brought along your bill for papers captain Haw-
SER
'Ay, ay, sir--how much is it?'
Three dollars
9 Is that ALI Make it six and I'll pay YOU
Thank you, thank you, Captain, I'll make il
nine # you insist upon it,
Avast there, my frepd-lhis will keep the
old woman in papers, Jill come back from the
East Indies. She likes your paper vastly-it is
her chart, and if | didn't leave 1t for her she
wouldn't know how the land lies.
Took 10y leave Of the captain with his six Span
sh dollars in my pocket, and pounced upon lot
terry broker Got my bill cashcd in The twieklino
Of an eye. Looked about the Office saw the walls
covered over with huge prizes, twenty thousand
dollars forty thousand dollars Felt almost
tempted TO make my fortune. But on second
thoughts could not afford it al present concluded
to wait and grow richer
QaIt the lottery broker, and looked in upon
doctor Thought had come for physic. Hoped
! was well, and secretly wished vas sick Gave
me lis hand, and indIsticIy as it ere, extended
his fore finger TO my pulse. Looked in my et
hand, thought appeared bin ious Assured bfm
he was correct, aud wished he would prescribe
Examined the case and thought lille noua
mirdbiis would cure it. Did not myself like the
prescription. Assured him knew something oil
the case, and that in my opinion, small quantity
ofpulvis argen,i, silver dust would be more eli
cacous Looked blank at this questioning Of his
professional skill Not inclined however TO dis
pule my judgment, and made out the prescription
accordingly.