Martinsburg gazette. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1833-1855, 1846-12-31
YRoa THE ApALAcHucoLA ADVERTISER.
SELLING SNAKES.


ton. she drought up" at an Intermediate
port between this place and the junction OF the
Chatahoochee and Flint rivers, for the pur-
pose OF "woodipg" or landing freight AS
soon as she had touched the bank, chow line"
made fast and plank out, was boarded by one
ofsihose not very rare specimens OF humanity,
a full grown ''liye hoosier," bearing all The
outward marLs and brands which designate the
"grcephonu genus. Only waiting I'll the
noise made by blowing off steam had ceased,
with bis hat down On his eyes, and his arms
firmly buried TO the elbows in his "uowser-
looms, pockets he marched resolutely up to
the clerk Of the boat and in loud, uncultiva-
I'D tone. inquired "if he didu't want 10 buy
Young rattle snake ?" The clerk, like most OF
The "boysp on our steamboats,, being partlcu-
,ary fond Of Joke and knowing his man."
Immediately conceived plan by which some
fun might be Lad in these dull tunes and low
prices. Assuming an AIR "as serious as
Judge" he propounded TO the snake man ma
nv questions as 10 the size, age, color and Oh
der OF his reptile, gravely remarking, alter all
his nieTrogations had been answered satisiac-
,orily, that "he was not just then in the snake
market himself. but there was commercial
house in Apaachicola who were loading
shin for Liverpool, and that part Of cargo was
10 consist Of rare collection Of wild beasts,
birds and reptiles; that every thing curious
was in great demand, and snakes, If they were
,hereal pizen. would readily bring from fifteen TO
twenty dollars per head" The hoosier, elated
with the thought of what handsome sum he
could make, thanked the clerk profoundly for
his information. and Immediately set out Tor
home. where ne ordered all hands to drop eve
nv thing else and go TO snake catching.
By the time the next boat passed that way,
bound for this port, he had succeeded in cap
turing. alive and unframed, barrel of the
mos, poisonous serpents, embracing every va
rie,y of hue that crawled in his "diggens"-
the adder. the moccasin, the rattle snake, Sc,
OF all ages and sizes. Having them on board
the boat, regularly shipped in good order and
well conditioned, marked and numbered as IN
the margin, and 10 be delivered at the port of
Apalachicoa, to Messrs. B. & H." (per direc-
ton of the clerk aforesaid,) ne paid his pas
sage and took them IN his own care, 10 make
their delivery doubly certain. As soon as he
had arrived here, ms first inquiry was Tor The
location Of the above firm. having found which,
he presented himself with al. the dignity Of
man engaged in legitimate trade, stated the IN
formation received from the steamboat clerk,
and desired that his snakes should be put at
once upon the market
Understanding the hoax at once, and deter
mining not to spoil the tun, MesSrs. b. 4 I'll.
regretted that they had just filed their last or
ders for snakes, but had no doubt they would
meet with ready sale, as there Were several hou-
ses in the trade, and he was directed TO one oil
these BY this time the news became general,
eyesy body knew that there was a snake vender
in town, and all had a disposition TO 'humor the
ioke.' Reading the signs along as he went,
TOD fnf
other counter, and demanded If they dldn't
i want 10 buy some snaix! Here he was in
Aterrogated with business like gravity, as 10 the
aage, size and species, 10 which he replied that
H.'they were Of all Substitute, mlddlin and
big; old, Young. and middle aged spreadin
adders, copper bellied. highland and water
Inoccasins, striped and yellow rattle snakes
but they were all real genuine plzen, warrant
cd 10 bite if they could, and 10 Kill II they bit.'
These were just the kind they had wanted,
and they were extremely sorry he had not ar
rived day or two earlier. as it was probable
they might have purchased the whole LOT
however, there was firm Il few doors below
who were in the snake market, and would no
doubt be glad OF so good aD opportunity OF
furnishing their fiicnds in Liverpool with such
variety Of poi'onuus SerpcntSi and 10 this
house he was directed. In this way the poor,
unsnSpecting, unsophlSticaed snake catcher
was driven from house 10 house, from mum
Der TO number, until Al last the day began 10
wane, and the prospects OF a sale 10 grow DIM,
he presented himself, with flushed cheek and
perspirng forehead. TO the captain Of one OF
our vessels. who, be had been told, would
probably take the whole lot al a fair price, and
asked IN despairng and almost suppliant
tone, ''dopt you want 10 buy my nair pr
The captain was prepared for the question as
the Joke had reached the cllmaX-and an un-
affected, irresistible roar Of laughter broke from
the crowd who had collected TO hear his last
appeal. The snake man stood aghast, the We
~ picture of utter amaZement aud wonder
but rerddnt as be was. q lay OF light broke in
upon him. and he began to understand that he
had been completely taken in. If any doubts
still fingered about his ubtuse intellect; they
were eflcctually removed by the remarks of
the crowd.
"Well," said he, pausng awhile as if to
bring his mind TO focus upon the extent OF
his wrongs, swell! it is n d--n mean trick
any how, to serve fellow. Here l've had
three niggers two days catching suaix, takin a
site of pains TO get 'em without a bruise or
scratch--run the risk Of being bit By the blasted
plsen things-paid three dollars 10 come down
on the d--n old boat deck passage, at that.
and the danger Of Dustin up thrown in-pald
thirty seven and half cents freight on the
barrel-lost three days work myself, and Wore
my legs s'most off trampin over your lister
shells and sand-got your nasty tleas all over
me a bitin-and hant sold nary s,Iake!
It's low life trick, any way you can fix it,
and that's what teller gIts by hayn any dea
Inns with your steamboat clerks and your town
pcopie-,he o'dGenica set IN all creation I'll
chop every d-n snaix head of, and take
'em back home; for they should'n, crawl in
no such dod routed place as thS!" And the
green 'un" was downright savage. To APP
pcase his wrath, however, "the boys" treated
10 the best the town afforded made up q sub
scripton to pay his passage back home, in the
cabin and promised never to buy snake
from any body but him, because he produced
the real pizen breed.
Having put his threat of bcheading the ser.
penis into execution. he left our city in the
return boat, with the barrel Of dead vipers. in
much better humor than could be expected
declaring, however, most roundly to the last.
that she never would believe id steamboat
clerks agin, as long as he lived, and that he
had made his first and last trip to4palachicola :"