Indiana State sentinel. [volume] (Indianapolis) 1841-1853, 1845-03-27
Volume IV=:::::;;;:a;Number 40.
Swallowing Oysters Alive.

Terrible Situation-The Disappearance.
At late hour, the other night, the door of an oys-
ter house in city thrust open, and IN staled
hero from the Sucker State. He quite six feet
high, spare, somewhat stopped with a hungry, anz-
ious countenance, and his hands pushed clear down
into the bottom of his breeches pockets His outer
covering was hard to define, but after surveying II
infinitely to the conclusion that his suit had
been made IN his boyhood, of dlngy yellow linsey
woosey, and that having sprouted up with astonsh-
ing rapdity, he had been forced to piece it out with
all colors in order to keep pace with his body. In
spite of his exertions however, he had fallen in ar
about foot of the necessary length and, con-
sequently stuck that far through his inexPressbles
His crop of hair surmounted BY the funniest look
ing seal skin cap imaginable. After taking posi-
tion be INDUCED in a long stare at the opening
the bivalves, and slowly Observation-Disclosures :"
Yes, sir, responded the attentive operator, land
fne ones they are, too"
"Well, I've heam tell of listers afore," says he,
''but this is the ust time I've seed EN- and perhaps
I'll know what thar made of afore git out of town.
Having expressed this desperate intention, he eau
tiOusly approached plate, and scrutnized the I'M
/ cased shell fish with gravity and interest which
would have done honor to the most iusrious search
into the hidden mysteries Of nature At length he
began to soioquize the difficulty of getting them
out, and how queer they looked when out.
''I've never seed any thin hold on so-'takes an
amazin site of screwn hoss to get EN- out and amt
1 tIlel SltCh WITH uOtS COLS
eel! I've good mind to give that feller lodg-
ms jst to realize the effects, uncle Jesse used to
say about spekelation."
'Well, sir" was the reply, ''down with two bits,
and YOU have dozen.'
"Two bits!" exclaimed the Sucker ''now come,
that's tickin it rite strong, boss, for listers. A
dozen of amt nothin' to chicken, and there's no
gittin' more than picayune apiece for them. "fve
only realized 10 picayunes my first venture to St
Louis. I'll tell you what, I'll gin you two chickens
for dozen, if you'll conclude to deal"
wag who standing by indulging in dozen,
wnked to the attendant to she'll out and the offer was
accepted
s'Now mind" repeated the Sucker, ''all fair-t5yo
chickens for dozen,-you are Witness mister, turn
ing at the time to the wag, none OF your tricks
for have hearn tell that you city fellers nifty
slippery coons.'
The bargain being fairly understood our Sucker
squared himself for the onset-deberately put of his
sealskn, tucked up his sleeves, and, fork in hand
awaited the appearance of No. l. 1t came--he saw
and quickly IL was bolted. a moments dreadful
pause ensued. The wag dropped MS knife and forl
with look Of mingled amaZement and horror-Solne
thing akin to Shakespeare's Hamlet seeing his dad
dy's ghost-while burst into the exclamation,
"Swallowed Glire as I'm christian"
Our Sucker hero had opened his mouth with plea
sure moment before, but now it stood open, consci
BUSINESS that all wasn't right, and ignorance of the
extent of the wrong,-the uncertainty of that mo-
wa OiSeu W uS>POioefOH hS
out
'What on airth's the row"
''Did you swallow it dire 2" enquired the wag.
81 swallowed it jest he gin it to me :" shouted
the Sucker.
you're dead man :" exclaimed his anxiou:
friend the creature is are and will eat right hrougI
you," added he, in a most hopeless tone.
''Git pizen pump and pump it out !" screamed the
Sucker in frenzy his eyes fairly starting from thell
sockets. 'Oh gracious -what'll do Its got hold
of my inRardS, already, and I'm dead chicken =
do somethin' for me, do-don't let the nfarnal sea-
toad eat me afore your eyes,
"Why didn't you put some of this on it 7" enquireC
the wag, pointing to bottle of strong peppersauce
The hint was enough-the Sucker, upon the in
slant seized the bottle and, desperately wrenchng out
the cork, swallowed half the contents at draught
He fairly squealed from its effects and gasped anC
bowed, and pitched, and twisted if it were cours
ing through him with the electric effect, while at the
same time his eyes a stream of tears. At length
becoming little composed, his waggish adviser ap
preached, almost bursting with suppressed laughter
| and enquired-
Show are you now, old fellow-did you kill it 2
! swell, | did, hoss, ''-ugh-ugh-o-o-o my inlards
If that iSier critters dyin' agonies didn't stir rue
ton in equal 10 small arthquake, then faint NJ
use sayin' tit squirmed like a sarpent when tina
KILN stuff touched it, 6ut'-and here with counte
nance made up of suppressed agony and present de
termination, he paused if to give force to his words
and slowly and deliberately remarked-''lf you gi
two chickens from for that live animal I'm id !!
and seizing his seal-skin he raRiShed
The shout of laughter and the contortlons of th'
company at this finale, would have made spectator
believe that they had all been "s'cGROaiAg oyster.
alire.''