The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1845-09-06
From the ST. Louis Reveille.
BILL SLOCUM'S LAST SPREE.
BY NEDDY KINGFlSHER.


Every body remembers the night Of
the l1th of November, 1888, when the
stars grew weary Of the monotony at
tendant upon their steady habits, and,
shooting wildly from their proper
spheres, got on one of the "talleSt'
sprees ever heard of. That night
forms a memorable era in the history
of many one, among whom few
stands more prominent than Bill Slo-
cum.
He was one of those unfortunate be-
ings who love liquor better than they
do their Maker; and he would give his
last dime for "a drink" though his FAM
lily was actually suffering for the COM
monest necessaries of life. He had
spent very respectable fortune in this
way, and for several years had almost
entirely neglected his family, leaving
his wife TO support them, and himself
too, as best she could. Liquor was his
God, and he guzzled it down whenever
he had an opportunity.
On the llth Of November, 1888,
there was a "Jig muster" at the village
Of RedviIle, a thing which happened
only once year, and, therefore, gave
considerable Importance to the afore-
said village. On such days as these
Bill Slocum was in his glory; for as Il
great deal of liquor was always drank
on such occasions, he never failed to
get as much as he wanted, (and that
was not little,) Stree gratis for uoM-
ing." Early in the morning Bill put
on his best "fxups"-and they were
"none ofthe best"- and off he went to
towr. Long before night he was go-
riously tipsy-that is to say, ''three
sheets in the wind and the other hut-
tering.' The liquor still continued to
pass freely, and Bill "swigged it" with
a right good will. SAT last said Bill,
81 got SO drunk that | could not tell
which end was uppermost; but Irecol-
Iect very well that the earth got to
jumping up. and it bit me some COR
founded hard knocks just between the
eyes, one Of which laid me sprawlng
on my back"
Here glorious state of don't carea-
hUeneSs came over him, and he lay
there like a warrior that had fallen in
an unequa! contest, while the "big bel
lied bottle" looked out at the window,
and "grinned horribly, a ghastly SMILE"
AS Bill fell into an unfrequented corner,
he lay undisturbed until the stars got
out upon their spree and frightened
half of those who saw them out of their
wits. The noise which the inhabit-
ants of the village mado woke Bill
Raising himselfup slowly, and rubbing
lis eyes, he surveyed the scene with
lstoniShment, and then began to sollio-
luise something after this fashion:
eyes, jest as I thought! The day
Of judgment has come, sartin, for
here's the stars falling, and here am
Trunk as piper. The big horn will
blow soon and Old Nick will be sure
o stick his fork into me-" Just then
lie espied large black cow in lot
eparated from him only by q fence,
nd as badly frightened as himself, if
possible, and mistaking her for the old
Gentleman, he continued: "There he
now, by gracious! there he comes,
h, don't! oh-o-o! and the frightened
nan fell back as the cow leaped over !
he fence.
"Never mean to git drunk again.
aid Bill, speaking Of the affair; 81 t
lought old Time was about to kick S
lc bucket, and | kuowed if he did /
,as gone sucker. was sure that e
Id cow was the devil, for when she S
lmped over the fences she had her eyes r
't and her tail twisted, small star on h
ach horn, and a belowin' like injine n
nd hollerin "B-i-l-l," jest as material as
1man--in course spread out and gin
p!"
care you fond of tongue, sirg' Il |;