The spirit of democracy. [volume] (Woodsfield, Ohio) 1844-1994, 1845-06-28
From the London Punch
MRS. CAUDLE'S CURTAIN LECTURES
LECTURE VIII

Mr.. Caudle has oppressed uiSh that one Of his
numerous 'ttle responsibilities uas Gt' the mas
cuitne gender. Mrs. Caudle is horror struck!
Mr.. Caudle, judgments of Heaven will fall on
you. | should not be surprised if you were 10 be
struck down. Finding fault with the order of
nature-and repining at the blessings which are
thrown into your lap. wonder what you won't
say next Wishing one of our darling girls was
changed into bay. CaudIe, you'll be punished
for this. There might as well be no punlshments
if man is not made to tec them after such
horrible wish!
What are you fighting and swearing at that rate
WITH Oh, bed-bug! 1t is not 50, Caudle; it is
only trick to stop me rom saying word.
can not speak word after come to bed but there
is a shirt button, pudding or bed bug thrown
into my face. You may lay and talk, and find
fault and scold-but as SOON your slave of
wife says word, she's insuted with fling about
bed-bugs told 10 stop her everlasting tongue
And this is the treatment receive, after shaving
myself to boil a nice pudding for your dinner! 1t
wasn't half done do you say' Oh, Caudle, if you
don't come 10 poverty aud know what it is to
want mouthfui of dinner, there's an end of JUS
tice-turning up your nose at lovely nice pud-
ding that tired your poor wife almost to death to
cook!
And so you want iussy, noisy tyke of boy
about the house, instead OF one of our pretty little
lady Caudes And | shouldn't be surprised 10
hear that you had mentioned it at that club of
,La ToIIo ,ho ,l,o
back and told you that you ought 10 stand up for
your rights | shouldn't wonder if that Pretty !
man went home and told his wife of it, and had a
hearty laugh at your making fool Of yourself. |
She's got house full of noisy, dirty boys, and
mighty proud she is OF them. Let me catch her
laughing at me, because all my boys are girs!-
Let me catch her, that's all. She wouldn't desire
to laugh but once-only once!
A boy in the house! First tearing this, then
breaking that; now pulling the cats TAIL then
brought home kicked by horse. When o!d
enough to see about himself, running away from
'chool-or going off TO sea! Perhaps when a man
dining club-ndeed know he would if he took
after his father! Caudle, | was not prepared for
1t, sworn at, and told to hold my tongue, before
lad spoken scarce word-but it remained for this
lights work TO finish my trials. Boys and bed
'ugs flung at me as though | was brute beast!
shall rot survive sch treatment lung-there's
ONE comfort in that shall die or 60 home to
mother, and you will be left TO find fault and scoId
o yourself. Don't tell me that you was only in
un. Fun indeed! 1t has come to pretty pass,
when you acknowledge you are making fun of
'our wife. Caudle, you tell a story. People
ome for? They come to behave like Christian
PEOPLE! Not to twit OF bed-bugs and then cry fun.
There isn't bug in this bed-but there's brute
n it-that has a wife with the temper of lamb
pattern of patience-that i; put upon every day
he lives. by her husband, because he knows her
nigel temper will not resist--who seldom opens
,er mouth, and when she does. there is nothing
,ut puddngs, or sky-lards, or boys, OR bed-bugs
hrown into it!
Don't tell me that never spoke in my life-that
IN dumb! Oh, Caudle, if it were a possible
hing, should be out of temper. This treatment
S horrible! Never spoke word! There's one
word wish never had spoke to you, sir When
'ou came bowing, and pleading, with your hat in
'our hand, and your hypocritical smiles, and be-
'eeched me to make you so unspeakably happy as
o become Mrs Caudle. was fool enough 10
peak word that set you dancing about the room
ike great fool as you are. The most unfortun-
lte word ever said was yes, to your impudence!
md sorry enough am for it. What business had
You to come around dear mothers house, and beg
ne to go a walking with you. and wheedling
ne with your nonseDsc' ]