Burlington hawk-eye. [volume] (Burlington, Iowa) 1845-185?, 1845-07-03

''flis tawny beard was TIL equal grace,
Bath of his wisdom and his face
Hudibras.
I. Whats them are things growing ont
Of your upper lip, Mlsler!' asked
country Yankee, OF coxcomb. whom
he met with the other day.
Sir exclaimed the dandy, fercelv
raising his rattan, and brislling up 10
his lnlerrogator-'wha business is that
to YOU, sar!'
'Oh, no business Of consequence to
speak on,' replied The yankee-'I just
axfd for information, not being much
acquainted with them are things
We'll, sir, returned the gallant, an
grily, what if you amt acquainted with
em9 Must a fellow of your cloth have
the impudence to question gentleman
OF mlne!'
is this really your cloth, Mister, or
is it The talor's?' asked The country
man.
The ,ailor's!' exclaimed the cox
comb, fiercely --'what do YOU mean by
thar Do You mean TO lnslnuate that
I-S'dealh' sar I'll not -,
We'll, thought as much returned
the yankee. cafees>ly sic king his hand
into his bleeches pc, ket. and standing
still before The dandy, i thought you
never intended to pay for them
Nv hat Is that 10 you whether | pay
for them or nol' lavn't | RICH. 10
manage as | please with my own tailor
to- pay him or lei il alonep
Why, Mister, that depends very
much on what sort Of bargain you
made. If yonr tailor agrees TO let you
cheat him, why that's his look out, not
mine But YOU havn't told me what
YOU called them are things on your up
per lip
'Sar, you're an impairment puppy,
sar.'
so heard YOU say. Now. fathers
go, iarrler dng-but he don't tarry
much. | can tell you-he'il kill three
rats III two seconds-but as | was say
! ing. father, he's go, tarrler dog. that's
/ darned rough aud harry about the mouth
I but Lnrd! lie amt a circumstance tc
you. He'd cling his tail betweenNls
legs if he was to see Won, and c Iii
til! and run 10 the end Of the I'd
without stopping My gracious bw
like the devil you do look with them
are things.
Look why, s.r, they are all the 60
now. There's no finished gentleman
J I,
.Alus,achers, do YOU call EN-! Well,
bv hokv. they are musty and rusty too.
/ hey look very much like the latter
end OF our dogs rail, When he brushes
il on the floor. Faugh! wouldn't
touch EN- no more than
Pouch EN- sar, # you offer 10 pu, a
fiuger on them, III cane you within an
inch of your life. will sar.'
w hat. with that are switch, Mister,
shouldn't mind il no more than /
would an oat straw.
! w ell. sar. touch my mustachers and
see if you don't get IT,
Touch your muslachers. Why. I'd
as lieve touch two old chaws Of loback-
er that have just been spit out. Touch
'em indeed! Why. Mister, wouldn't
touch 'em with the tongs. can't con-
ceive, for my life, what should induce
any human crltter TO wear such darned
nasty looking things as them.
Nasty looking! do you call emf
Sar, you have no taste. Nasty looking
indeed! Why, sar. they are all the
adn,ratian of the ladies'
Ladies'. hal ha! ha! They mus
have queer notion any how. Blu
there are women who are unaecounta
bly, fond of puppies and SIGH like ami
mails: and | have seen 'em tondle and
kiss 'em as If they were human critters
But, Lord! | don't see how any woman
could lei her lip come III gun shot oil
yourn Admiration of the ladies!
DO you question what | say, slr!
.Whv, Mister, | don't know what
kind Of ladies' you have IN the city
here. But one thing | can tell you
our country gals would not no more lei
YOU touch EN- than they would a toad
they very particular what comes
in contact with taeir lips. But. Mister,
how il the name Of HAIR and brlstIes do
YOU eat! How do you go 10 work to
get the vlitles into your month, with
them are things hanging over Il, WE -
hedge fence over The side Of a dltclSv
TO you eat meat and sch like! Or 10
YOU live on spoon vittles!
ITS none OF your business, sar, wha,
live on. | board a. seven dollars a
week; and eat what | please, sar and
drink what please
Seven dollars week! my gracious!
we gil board and washing and all ineie
country, for dollar and fifty cents' M,
'spose they ask you five dollars and
half extra for them are mnstychers.
Faugh. wouldn't have 'em al the table
for ten dollars.
w hat fool am to stand here IaiK-
ing TO man OF our cloth Y
Thus saying, The man WIN 'he NOUS
taches ff,urlshed his dandy switch,
wheeled abou, and walked on. He
had gone but few steps when The yam.
kee bawlrd after him