Southport telegraph. [volume] (Southport, W.T. [i.e. Kenosha, Wis.]) 1840-1850, 1845-05-20
From Meals Saturday Gazette.
L ARLY MARRIAGES..
BY MRS. CATHERINE ENFIELD.

mere Is no worldly subject oil more inn
PORTAGE 10 woman than that Of marriage.
BY il she determines her destiny fer this
lie, and often for the one 10 come. Her
ease of mind depends on its happiness
infinitely more then does that of the man.
If he finds himself incompalibly matched,
the husband may seek relief in business,
ambition, or other sources Of pleasure
abroad; but her home once made unhappy.
the wife has no refuge for her sorrowing
teart. Her grief must be buried in her
own bosom. She mu,t weep alone.
1t is consequently Of great Importance
that woman should seriously consider the
step she is about 10 take before entering the
marriage state. She may be united 10 a
very worthy man, and yet be unhappy. for
there is every thing in the fitness of the
mutual dispositions of the married pair; or
she may pledge her faith 10 one, who,
though in outN ard appearance every thing
that could be wished, has character
unworthy of her love. TO guard against
such an evil, requires n serious and careful
scrutiny in the selection o! partner for
life
TO learn the character and disposition
Of gentleman, we admit is no easy task
woman may have been acquainted With
her lover Tor months, and yet, really know
very little about his temper and his general
conduct The stronger sea poss sses IA
great advantage over ours, as society is
now constituted; for while u sutton NAV call
upon lady whenever he is in mood to
be agreeable, she is forced to receive him,
unless actually engaged in some household
occupation. no matter how unfit she feels 10
entertain him. A gentleman tbumsShe
chance of always showing 30 "a, ese
advantage; and thus increases the 'dfffcuiu
on the pari of the lady, Of learning bis
disposition. Nevertheless, hard as the task
is, there is no impossibility in it. There
are continually occurring in social inter
course, hundreds of little things, which,
Ike straws that show from what point the
wind blows, reveal TO a careful observer
the temper and principles of the acquain-
lance. A has,y word, sudden frown, n
peevish look, a scornful toss Of the head,
lllberal remarks on persons absent, ten
dency TO decry every body but themselves,
disregard OF the comfort Of others IN trivial
w
be seized on by persons conversant with
character as unerring signs of the DISPOSE
ton of the object of their scrutiny; and it
is because parents are better judges Of the
force of these little things, that they often
form a different and generally more accu-
rate estimate of the real character of their
visitors than their children do. On the
other hand, because women are generally
keener observers than men, our sex pos
sesses considerable advantage over the
other sufficient, indeed, to counter balance
the privilege which gentlemen have of vi
sitting at their pleasure, 10 which we have
before alluded. Thus much for temper
The character of suitor may be left TO be
decided on by father, brother, or other
male relative, who have always superior
means of obtaining information on this
point We think it undeniable, that very
lew marry unhappily, who may not lay the
blame OF 1t TO themselves. But how comes
1t, the reader will ask, that so many unions
ale unhappy? We answer, because they
are contracted before sufficient knowledge
Of each other has been obtained by the
parties. And fruitful cause Of this igno-
rance is the early age at which our sex
generally, in this country, enters into the
married state-an age so carly that the
character is scarcely formed, and the judg
ment too immature 10 decide on the com
patlbIlty OF the suitor, even il the observa-
ton is practised enough to discover his
disposition and character. Probably the
average age at which females marry in the
United States, is eighteen years. 1t is
certainly not beyond that.
There are many causes for this, some
oil which, 1t is true, are rremediable. The
beauty Of American women is greatest at
that age. Comparatively very few remain
beautiful al twenty-five {; and ii is rare,
indeed, to sec really handsome female al
forty. But when we speak thus, we allude
merely 10 what is called physical beauty
There is a lovelness Of face, distinct from
that of features-a loneliness which con-
ssts wholly in expression, and which is a
reflex on the counieoance Of all the sweet
emotions Of the soul and this loneliness is
enduring, growing even brighter with age,
and shining with glorious lus;re, like a
sanity halo, around The face Of mother
or wife in old age. This beauty, unhap
PLY. is not that which is generally sought
for by suitors; but where /; is, be sure that
the lover is one of a hundred, for he seeks
that pearl of great prce-a beauty OF the
soul, which shall not fade away, but begun
here will be completed in heaven How
much is it 10 be regretted that mar does no,
think more Of this moral and mental beauty.
than Of that mere loneliness Of feature aud
complexion which is all Of The "ear,h
earthly" and which is too often accompa
MED by vanity, hcarllessness, ill-temper
and selfish character.
Bot after all the evil lies with our sex
II has become much a matter Of course
for girls TO be marrjd at eighteen, that few
care 10 pass beyond that age, and many
show silly eagerness 10 secure husband
in time. Let, however, our sex set their
faces against these early marriages; and
then the lover, who has been FIRST attracted
by a pretty face. will be retained by an
admiration Of your good qualities. This
will be The only certain way 10 secure your
happiness for. after all. unless you nre
loved for your qualities OF mind and heart
and not for those Of person. The affection