The Evansville journal. (Evansville, Ind.) 1834-184?, 1845-01-16
From tic 81 LoHis ReUielie.
SWALLOWING OYSTERS ALIVE.
NJ SOLITAIRE.

A Sae4er--His First Oyster-SraUotuiag
It Alipe-Terri5le Sitgation-7ae Res
cue-DisGppcarance.
At a late hour, the other night. the door Of
an oyster house in our city was hurst open.
and in staIked a hero from The Sucker State.
He was quite six feet high, spare, somewhat
stopped, with hungry, anxious counienance
and his hands pushed clear down TO the bot
ION of.his breeches pockets. His outer Gov
ering was hard to define, but after survey
ing it infinitely, we came 10 the conclusion
that his suit had been made in his boyhood
Of a dingy yellew linsey-woolsey, and, that,
having sprouted mp with astonishing rapidi-
ty, he had been forced 10 piece it out with
all coiors TO keep pace with his body. In
spite of his exertions, however, he had fall
en- in arrears about a foot of the necessary
length, aud, consequ emily. stuck that far
through his inexpressibies. His crop ofhair
was surmounted by the funniest lIttle seal
skin cap imaginable. After takinga position
he indulged in a long stare at the man open
ing the biralres, ana slowly Calculated
"lstersl!n
les, 81, lSSpOtQCu lhG iltClltibG OpElt-
tor, 'and fine ones they are, too
well, I've hearn tell of isters alore,' says
he, 'but this is the flst time I've seed 'em and
perhaps iii know what than made of aforc 1
git out o~ftown.'
Having expressed this desperate intention.
he cautiously approached a plate, and gcru-
tinized the uncascd she'll fish with a gravity
and interest which would have done honor
TO the most illustrious searches into the hid
den mysteries of nature. At length he be-
gan to soliloquize on the difficulty of getting
them out. and how queer they looked when
out.
81 never seed any thin hold on so-takes
an a-mazin site of screwin', boss, 10 get 'em
out, and amt they slick aud slip'ry whenthey
does come? Smoott as an cell Eve got a
good mind to give that felier lodgins', Jest 70
realize the effects, as uncle Jess used 10 say
about spekclation.'
well, SIR was the reply, 'down with two
bits, and you can have a DOZEN
two bitsi' exclaimed the Sucker, NOW,
come, that's siickin' ii on right strong, boss,
for islers. A dozen on 'em amt noihin'to a
chicken, and there's no gitin' more'n a plea
yune a piece for them. I've only realized
Is picayunes on my first venlur TO ST. L.ou-
is. lft tell you what III gin you two chick
ems for a dozen, on EN- If you'll conclude to
DEAL
A wag, who was standing by INDUCING in
a dozen, winked TO the attendant toshell out,
and The offer was accepted.
Now mind repeated the Sucker, 'all fair
two chickens for a dozcn,-you'fe witness
mister,' turning at the same time to the wag;
mono Of your tricks, for I've hearn tell that
you city tellers are mighty slip'ry coons.'
The bargain being fairly understood, our
Sucker squared himself for the onset,-delib-
erately put off his s~eal-skin, tucked UP his
sleeves, and. fork in hand, awaited the APP
pearance ofNo l.. 1t came-he saw--and
and quickly it was boltedl A moments
dreadlnl pause ensued. The wag dropped
his knife and fork with a look of mingled
anazement and horror,-someihing akin TO
Shakespeare's Hamlet ON seeing his dad
dy's ghosl,-while he bustin;o the exelama-
ton
'SaIlowed dlire.i as I'm christain.'
Our Sucker hero had opened his moulh
with pleasure a moment before, but now it
STOOD open. Fear--a horrid dread of he
didn't know what-a consciousness that all
wasn't right, and ignorance of the extent of
the wrong,-the uncertainty Of that moment
was terrible. Urged to desperation be fal
tered out
'What on airth'S the row?
did you swallow it ALIvE? enquiredt the
wag.
Iswaliowed it jist as he gin it TO me shout
ed the Sucker.
you're a dead mani exclaimed his axious
friend; sthe creature is ALIVE and will eat
right through you,' added he, I'M most hope
less tone.
SIT a pizen pump and pumpit out scream
ed Sucker, in a frenzy, his eyes fairly start
ing from their sockets. 'Oh graclous!-I
wbai'll [ do?-h's got hold of my innards,
already, and I'm dead as a chicken!--do
somethin' for me, do--don't let the internal
sea-toad eat me afore your eyes.
'Why didn't you put some of this on it?l
enquired the wag, pointing TO bottle of
strong peppersauce.
The hint was enougl-the Sucker, upon
the instant, seized the bottle and desperate
wrenched out the cork, sw allowed halt the
contents at drought. He fairly squaled from
its effects, and gasped, and blowed, and
pitched, and twisted. as if it were coursIng
through him with the electric effect, while
at The sam time his eyes ran a steam of
tears. At length, becoming a little compos
ed, his waggish adviser approached. almost