The Columbia Democrat. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1837-1850, 1845-04-05
'EON HY RUE'
An Amusing story of western life

chance Of legs, there, any howp-Judg,
DougloSS' Story.
The gentleman from Illinois is no
the only gentleman whose legs have lee
MIN into embarrassment! A pollica
fiiend of ours, equally happy 10 hn
manners if not in his party, among lh'
Missouri constituency found himsel
while canvassng the Stale las, sum
mer, for Congress, in even a MARI
peculisrily perplexingpredics ment than
the Illinois Judge.
There is spot in the Soulhwasee T.
pant Of THIS State, known as The Fiey5
Forh QfHoney Rum, delicious loo
lry no doubt, as lhe fun OF 'hunev' !,
f course accompanied by correspond
ny flow OF milk and a mixture of milk
and honey, or, at any rate, honey and
peach is the evidence Of subluuary
Iconrenrmen', every place where they
have preaching!
Honey Run' is further Chrlslianized
" the presence of an extremely hospir.
,nle family, whose manson, comprising
one 0partment-netlher more nor les,
is renowned for being never shut a.
!anist The traveller, aud so our friend
iound it during the chill morning air
nc expense Of a rheumatism in hi.
shoulder, its numerous unaffected crack ,
md spaces clearly showing That drop
p,ng the latch was an useless formallv
rhe venerable host and hostess in thei,
one apartment, usually eujoy the society
# Two sons, four daughters, sundry
logs and 'niggers,' and as many lodger,
IS may deem i, prodent 10 risk tn
somewhat equlvocaI allotment Of sleep
rng partners. On the nighl'in question
our friend, after hearty supper OF ham
nd eggs. aud canvass Of the Fiery
Forkers, the old lady having pointed
~ his bed, felt very weary, aud Only
looked Cor an opportunity 20 Hurn in,
though the mosquitoes w're trumplne
II sorts Of wrath, and no net app-afer
bar them. The dogs flulg lhemselvr
along the floor, or again rose, es'les,ly,
and sought The door step; the 'nigger''
tuck their fee. ia the yet warm ashes,
he old man stripped, unscrupulousy y
,od sought his share of the one colIsp'
'd-lookng pillow, and the sons, cavah
cry, followed his example, leaving the
lid woman, 'gSIs' and Stranger 10 set.
lie any question OF del'cacy that nigh
arise.
The candi date yawned, looked at his
bed, went 10 the door, looked at tn
,Iaughlers; fna lily, in downright reck,
lessness, he seated hlmSe If upon Th,
Iowny,' and pulled of his coat, Wei
he pulled of his coal--sud he folded hi,
coal-and then he yawned --sud lheu
whiSlled and then he called The old
Iadys attention 10 The fact, that it wouId
never do to sleep in his muddy trow-
then he 'undd' his vest--and
lhen he whi.,led again---snd Then, sud
denly, an idea Of her odger's embar,
seemed TO flush upon the OIL"
woman, and she cried
'GalS, jest turn your backs round I'LL
,he stranger gi's into bed
The backs were turned, and the
,trsogcr did get into bed in 'ess thar
40 Time, 'when the hostess again spoke:
Rec kon stranger, as you ainl used t.
us, you'd better hirer up uII gals undres,
hadn't you?'
BY this time our friends sleepy Fl
was ovei, and though he did 'klver up, ,
as desired, some how or other, The OLD
coun,erpane was equally kind in hiding
his blushes, and lsvoriog his s ly glances
The nymphs were soon slowed away,
for there were neither busles to unhltch
nor corsets 10 unlace when THEN man
ma, evidently anxious not TO smother
her guest, considerably relieved him:
'You can unkiver now, stranger; Pm
married folks, and you ain'l afeared O.
me reckon!
The stranger happened to be married
folks himself: he unkvered and turn
ed his back with lIue connubial indifI-
erence, as far as The ancient lady was
lconcerned, but, with regard 10 the
'gaiS,' he declares that his haIi-raised
curosily inspired the most tormenllng
dreams of n1erndids that he ever expe.
Irienced. 81. Louis ReUiHe.
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