The daily union. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1845-1857, 1845-05-15
MISCELLAN US.
From the London Punch
MRS. CAUDLE's CURTAIN LECTURES.

MRS. CAUDLE'S CURTAIN LECTURES.
Mr.. Caudls has been made .uason-Jurs Caudis
indignant and curious
snow, Mr.. Caudle-Mr. Caudle, say; OH you
can I be asleep already, / know-Now, what mean
20 say this; there 3 use, none at ALL IN our hav-
ing any disturbance about the matter but at last
my mind IS made up, Mr. Caudle; shall leave you
Either know all you we been doing tonight or to-
morrow morning quit the house. No, no; there IS
AN end of the marriage state, think-an end OF all
confidence between man and wife-if a husband s
TO have secrets and keep em all to himself. Pretty
secrets they must be, when his own wife can 7 know
'em. Not fit for any decent person TO know, I'm
sure if that Is the Now, Caudle, don Z let US
quarrel there 8 good soul, tell me what 8 it all
about A pack of nonsense, dare say; still-not
that care much about it--still, should like to
know. There IS a dear. En- Oh, don't tell me
there 3 nothing in it know better. I'm not
fool, MIR. Caudle; l know there IS good deal IN 1t.
Now, Caudle, just tell me little bit of It, l I'M
sure d tell you anything. You know would.
Wels
''Caude, you re enough to vex saint! Now,
don 7 you think you re going to sleep because
you re not. Do you suppose d ever suffered you
TO go and be made mason if didn Z suppose
was to know the secret too' Not that it anything
to know, dare say; and that Is why I'm determined
TO know 1t.
"But know what it is oh yes, there can be no
doubt The secret is to ill-use poor women; to ty-
rannize oser 'em; to make 'em your slaves; especi-
ally your wives. 1t must be something of the Sort
or you wouldn I be ashamed to have il known
What 3 right and proper never need be done IN Sc
cret 1t IS an insult to a woman for man to be
free-mason, and let his wife know nothing OF It.
But poor soul she IS sure to know 1t somehow
for nice husbands they all make. Yes, yes; part
of the secret is To think better OF all the world than
their own wives and families. I'm sure men have
quite enough to for-that is, if they act prop
erly--to care for them they have at home. They
can have much to spare for the world besides.
"And l suppose they call you Brother Caudle'
self up in an apron, like turnpike man-for that IS
what you look like. And | should like to know
what the apron q for? There must be something in
it not very respectable, l IN sure. Well, only
wish was queen for day or two. d put an end
to free-masonry, and all such trumpery, know.
Snow, come, Caudle, don I let IS quarrel. Eli
You re not in pain, DEAR What IS it all about
What are you lying laughing there at But IN a
fool to trouble my head about you.
"And you re not going to let me know the secret,
Ell, You mean to say,-you re not Now, Cau-
die, you know it hard matter to put me in pas
sion-not that l care about the secret itself: no,
wouldn't give button to know it, for 1t Is all nom
sense, | I'M sure. II ism 7 the secret l care about :
it s the slight Mr.. Caudle; it 8 the studied insult
that a man pays to his wife, when he thinks of 60
ing through the world keeping something to himself
which he won I let her know. Man and wife one,
indeed l should like to know how that can be
when man IS a mason-when he keeps secret
that sets him and his wife apart Ha, you men
make the laws, and so you take good care to have
all the best Of 'em to yourselves; otherwise wo-
man ought to be allowed divorce when man be-
comes a mason. When he 8 got a sort of corner
cupboard in his heart-a secret place in his mind
that his poor wife ism 7 allowed to rummage!
"Caudle, lou shan 7 close your eyes for week
no, you shan 't--unless you tell me some of it.
Come, there Is good creature; there Is love. I'M
sure Caude, wouldn I refuse you anything-and
you know it, or ought to know i by this time.
only wish had secret To whom should think
be miserable to keep it to myself, and you know it.
Now, Caude!
"Was there ever such man man, indeed
A brute yes, Mr.. Caudle, unfeeling, brutal
creature, when you might obige me, and you
won i. I'm sure don 7 object to your being a
mason; not at all, Caudle dare say it IS very
good thing dare say it is-it Is only your making
a secret of it that vexes But you vi tell me-
you III tell your own Margaret You won II You re
a wretch, Mr.. Caudc.
is, you re ashamed to let me know what fool they
we been making of you. That IS it. You, at your
time of life-the father of family. / should be
ashamed of myself, Caudle.
"And suppose you III be going to what you call
your lodge every night, now. Lodge, indeed! Pref
~ place It must be, where they don 7 admit women.
other brethren. Brethren l IN sure you d rela-
tons enough; you didn 7 want any more.
oBut know what all this masonry $ about, 1t IS
families, that you may feast and drink together,
that IS all. That's the secret. And to abuse wo-
men,-as if they were inferior animals, and not to
be trusted. That Is the secret; and nothing else.
"Now, Caudle, don 7 let us quarrel. Yes, know
you re in pain. Still, Caude, my love; Caudle !!
Dearest, say! Caude! Caud--''
81 recolect nothing MORE" says Caudle, "for
here think Providence 1 fell asleep.o