Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1845-12-04
Uartftp.

DartftQ.
fT6e following dialogue recently oeeur-
betueen sfnisiress Of one Of our pub
lie schools and scholar
Flames. ifsyou take three from I'VE.
Nv many will remain
En- don't KNOW. nafn replied The ur.'
din, biting hls thumb pal.
mot knowi n five birds we're sag
az on one three and nabgbiyboy should
lie 81 Gun and kill three. how macy
Weuld be lefli'
None, was the ptoup, reply
WHY va. there Eouli De SOM let
No there wouidni. PHASE n.sTn,
eauss fhsTssf roald1tI ssrsy
..q6ssses Of Hind ~ The clerks 81 Ia
thionable dry goods estsblishmei % NeA
YORK. were thrown fa;er great confusion,
ashori time since BY f01tng among their
rpods on The counter, . young JtsPoau-
BIlay. They were relieved howess BY
NE anxious mother returning for Der ba-
/ by. STE never discovered her loss until
ne attempted 10 suckle bundle Of goods,
which she had taken in il place,
Mamma, said Miss Julisna Selma Car.
e1ina Languish. who are these Middle
ions-aHybody y why. ny dear, young
Middleton joined the hunt lssi week. and
vas ibirodsesd 10. the. last ball, and keeps
i tiger; snd YOU know they must be
scmsbody.' Yes. mamma but ] can't
help thinking that they are only arelired,
very good sort Of people, no doubt /; but
ahere Is something about Them that makes
Tine think they are nobody, after al -
k'M Ny dear. they must be somebody. No,
mamma: they want 10 pass for somebo-
Hdy, but - everybody knows. there is al
tIwsys d something which fells you direct
sliy whether anybody is anybody aud il j.
mot bit OF use for any body Who 10 no.
body topre.end 10 be somebody.
4 "A western. editor says that . girl lately
sent him word that II he didn tFshut his
mouth about bishops, she'd wrap him up
inSa rag and make 5ustle Of him. Thai
j, what We call catching Tartar.
a Strange Ioter-Somebody threw a
ballot al Boston on Monday, containing
the following names ~ William Common
sense. Jacob Honesty, Richard Straight
forward. Peter Prudence, Thomas Ecodo
my. Mexander Fearno,hing. Reuben
Faithfull Samue! Undergraduates.
z.'.W hereaboats fnl the good book shall |
read r. asked Ahe spouse Of worthy dea-
con in 1he church as be opened the sa
!. cred volume for The family evening SER.
vice. "Oh, il makes no great difference
where. = was the deaoonB grave reply !;
'.read tbe story 81 Sampson and the ioxes
~ guess that's shout as funny as any
on'IlH
Have you got 4 ticket. air. asked the
door-keeper q, ihe National the other
evening, Of gentleman who was enter.
ing the boxes. Ticket ?--no. | belong
20 the press. wasthe reply. What press,
siri 1.-THE 0rleans Cotton Press, an.
swered the wags 'Ah, very well; walk
I'M sir said the door keeper, too much
tiekled with the cool impotence of the
joke 10 demand The money.
More Fasiidious Sill. There iva
young lady in New Orleans so laslidious,
that she wont admit the bare newspaper
into erbed room 10 tie morning --it must
have irraRPer on. +
Bad SLATE Of Society Since May last
the enormous nnmber OF 2909 females
have been entombed ID the city Of New
York for various offences; OF whom l0l;
have been sent iothe Peniten,iary, 3 -to
Sing Sing. and 1880 reptimanded and
sent of.
Ma, amt Joe Smashey ! couriin our
Meley y
MOI wha, makes youtbink soi'
why, always when becomes near her
she sorier leans up TO him like pig 10 a
warm jam
Rock The cradle, is now rendered,
agi.ste the responsibility
Neck and Heels. A young man nam
ED Neck, yasIecently' married 10 a Miss
Heels They are nov. therefore, tied
.ftsk and Heels together.
+: II is now thought that the term, dark
ages, refers to duration previous 10 the
invention Of spectacles.
Your case is a hard one and must be
looked into, Is The chap said to the Oys.
Ter,
4 BuH.-0fO, Conuell this anecdote 10
Told. Some one requested his auioeraph
Ito whom he sent the following Irish
answer: Dear Sir-Your request has
been received aud il cannot be complied
with. Yours, Daniel o. Connell.
Questions and ,9nswers DO you erjoy
good health 4
Yes.sery much. when have il.
Whsissre eggs aoR dsys'
Partly chickens.
VIII you give ne a-half cup Of coffee Z
We hare no bali cups.
Don't yoa think It warm 10 the sun To-
day.
Cant tall bavn't been fherp.
Did yoh saw load Of wood f1r me last
~ ii.