Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1845-12-25

oouy1 anu Wlldt lIldu6 me CdFtdln, t1eFG Was
a slit in the right ear,-my mark. Well, /
goes to Mr.. Jones, do, and tells him he has
got my hog in his pen. He said he had
not; very well, says |, we will see. So
goes home, brings Sally, Bill Shanks, Perry
Grub, and Sam Doolittle, all who knowed
the hog and swore it was mine Mr.. Jones
said they were id liars; that it was his
hog, and he could prove it. tell you now
my dander riz, and was about to walk in
to him like bear in canebreak, bnt Bill
Shanks stopped me. Well, says !, that hog
| will have if it costs me every cent can
rake. So goes right off to Squire Sturges,
gifts writ and 'plevies the hog. This is ALL
Mr.. Lyyer, and want you to come up be-
fore the Squire next Monday and see me
righted." .... -. .~.....>s
Every good, sir" was my reply, II shall
certainly be there; your case is very clear
one II you can prove the facts as stated"
My client now left, after leaving his name,
which was Hardbottom, and saying he
should certainly expect to see me on the
day aforementioned. A writ of 'plevy |!
what in the devil did this mean :? could
not recollect any such writ in my reading,
and what was worse did not know where
to look to find it. had but few books,
into each of which looked, but could find
nothing like the word 'plevy. However,
| determined this should not prevent me
from trying the hog case. So throwing
myself upon those resources which Nature
had bestowed, and relying upon what know
ledge | might pick up in the course of the
trial, went to the magistrates court on
the day appointed. ...
The court was held some ten or twelve
miles from town, in the interior of wild
country. Upon reaching there | found
those who had business were all assembled.
| was introduced to Squire Sturges, who
was big, fat, corpulent man, with face
vermillioned by grog. He was walking
about in his shirt sleeves, whiting the smoke
from very rank cigar, and looking as con-
sequential as if he had been governor of a
province. The court was held in log
cabin, attached to one end of which was
a grog-shop, and usually on court days JUS
tice was dispensed according to the quanti-
ty of liquor furnished the judge, either by
the plaintiff or defendant. | learned this.
and Immediately invited the Squire to take
a glass; which he cheerfully did, and re-
Peated several times at my expense.
The hour for. commencing business had
now arrived. The squire took his seat
upon stool, in front of which was a small
lpine table. He was still with his coat of
and newly lit cigar in his mouth. n.
'Gentlemen," said he, "the case first in
order on the docketis EIardbottom Us. Jones.
Are the parties read - 81" ID. 81 saf .ss
t'The plaintiff is ready" replied. ..-5
"Well then, gentlemen, proceed to trial.
Mr.. Jones have you lawyer 20 s.e.a ~es..
Yes, sir; Mr.. Spoony here is my law
yer" ... E .I.asas.- s.. ,sa F..
And from the crowd stepped forth tall,
sWay-backed man, with coarse and rigid
features, looking as if he had received many
hard rubs in this vale Of tears, IT.. #@s
''The defendant is ready,o he said. .
From his stern look and ,gruf manner, I
felt some misgivings; but my client soon
revived me, by telling that he was 'no sci
enced lawyer, but merely chimney-corner
lcounsellor that he had been constable
once, and from having been constantly en-
gagged in law suits had caught up little
smattering of the profession.7 This gave
me courage, ! opened the case by stating
what / could prove. My witnesses were
called up, and swore to the hog, and the
marks as before described. Here rested
The defendants witnesses now took the
stand, and swore point blank that the hog
belonged to Mr.. Jones, and described pre-
cisely the same marks upon his hog as my
witnesses had done. 1t was a singular case.
saw, however, small discrepancy upon
which thought possibly could succeed
Nv witnesses had described two curls in
the tail of Hardbottom's hog; whereas
Jones' witnesses had sworn to but one.
Spoony, saw, did not notice this, and af-
ter he had made long, boring speech.
which produced no excitement, and tired
the Judge, arose and commenced speaking
about the value of pork and hog meat In
general, then branched off upon Bonaparte's
career, the exploits of Alexander the Great,
came down to our Revolution, spoke OF
! Washington and the American Government.
At every pause the squire followed out,
bravo! now told him had tale to I'M
fold. The learned gentleman had overlook
ed the important fact which my witnesses
had sworn to, that my clients hog had two
curls in his tail, whereas Mr.. Jones' hog
was proven to have but one. May it please
your honor, is this not clincher? Can
your honor doubt now how to decide? No,