The Ottawa free trader. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1843-1916, 1845-06-13
The Old r,nid,. Fir, oSer.


| must tell you the heart-rending story.
| have long wished to do so, and The time
has at length arrived Here her voice
dropped into confidential whisper. I
Poor dear Major Ogilvie, who is now
dead and gone, (heigh no y had long been
showing me marked attenion-in fact,
paying his addresses, though he neve
made his eclaratons-when one morn
ing, after having sung me song OF Fam
ninelli's-tho music, | believe, was
Gluck 's-ah! you should have heard the
major, he was such sweet singer
Well, the doctor had gone out TO buy
some newly invented FISH sauce--poor
dear man! he does like TO have his fish
well dressed-and remember lie took
Fancheue, my lille beauty of spaniel
with him. so tina, the major and | were
all alone in the breakfast parlor, when.
looking in my face, he suddenly went on
one knee before me--ah there sras gal
lantry in those days-and taking my hand
which he tenderly pressed, made pas
sionate avowal of his love. felt N.Y.
sell blushing crimson; when, at this agi-
laiing moment, just as | was going TO nj.
ter palpitatiug confession of my partial
lly, my eyes began TO twinkle in my
nose, my mouth opened in spite of my
self, and sncezed, like an explosion Of
gunpowder, right in his upturned and i'm
ploring face! Now tell me, Lady Su.
san. you know how tremendously al
ways sneeze, did you ever--ol all the
awkward occurrences
The Major started as well he might,
but recovered himsel(---so did |. He
gazed at me tenderly, expectancy; and
was just about 10 relieve him Of his sus-
pense, when sneezed with second and
louder explosion, that seemed 10 scatter
the nose from my face. This was a CON
fusion TO me and the major; but. still
holding my imprisoned hand, and look.
ing downward to avoid The shower.balh
| was Internationally scattering around
me, he swore that lie never would rise
from his knees ill | had pronounced. !
uttered heartfelt sigh, and the soft avow-
al was just Trembling on the tip Of my
nose. Lady Susan, it was beginning to
bleed did you ever of all the dis
lressng moments
! struggled 10 withdraw my hand, tina,
| might &c, my handkerchief in action,
which the major attributed to coyness and
therefore did he hold it more firmly. In
the contest, after rightly spolting my tab
inc, silk gown, three very large drops oil
blood fell upon tho majors wrist! lie
started up--l closed my eyes, and sunk
into a chair overwhelmed with confusion.
Surprising | had tainted, the major hasti.
ly seized large tumbler Of water and
threw it INTO my face. AT such an I'M
expected sousing, screamed with sur
prise aud terror. The marshal powder
which wore--I was always famous fol
my powder-mingled with the water ant
blood, converted my face into hideou;
spectacle--- when just at that moment the
door flew open, and Fanchet;e, thinking
that her mistress was killed, flew at iht
poor dear major aud bit large mouthfu
on, Of his left leg; while the good hor
ror-stricken doctor let the bottle Of new
y-invented fish sauce fall from his hanl
and be smashed to pieces on the floor
Now, dearest Lady Susan, consider wha
must have been my feelings did 20,
ever such scene.