The Cadiz sentinel. [volume] (Cadiz, Ohio) 184?-1851, 1845-02-26
nNOT A DROP MORE, MAJOR, UNLESS
IT'S SWEETENED !"

In 4 small village in the southern section Of
our state, resides a certain Major, who keeps a
small cosey, comfortable inn, famous for its
sweetened drinks, as we'll as its joyiol landlord
and few of the surrounding farmers visit the
neighborhood without giving the Major a friend
ly call to taste his 'miztur.' The gay host, with
jolly phiz, round person, bright eye, and militia
nv air, deals out the rations spiccd with Jokes,
which, ii they are not funny, are at least laughed
at. for the maj or enjoys them so vastly himself
that his auditors are forced to laugh out Of pure
sympathy.
A good couple, who resided about six miles
from the majors, for q long period had been in
the habit of visiting him once q month, and as
regularly went home dreadfully sweetcned with
the favorite 'mixtur,' but of late we learn that
the amicable relations existing between the Ma
jor and the old visitors have been broken off
On the last visit, good cause for an end being put
to any more sweet drinking
'uncle Merrill, how are you, any how?' was
the Majors greeting and declare if the Mis-.
sis amt with you t%oo,'-just as if he expected
she wouldn't come. 'What'l you take, Missis?
Shall | swectcn you a little of about the best
rectified that ever was toted in these ERE payts!
lit Jest looks as bright as your cyes!-and here
the Major winked and looked so sweet, that there
was no resisting, and she did take a little sweet.
ened.
Tho hours flew merrily by, and evening found
the old couple 50 overloaded with Sweets that
it was with great difficulty they could be seated
on the old gray mare to return home: but, aftel
many a kind shake from the host, and Just anoth
er drop of his swectened, off they logged, see
saving from side to side on the c%rItter, the ole
lady muttering her happiness, and the old maj
too full to find words to express himself.
fSich another man as that Major said The
dame, 'aint nowhere-and SIGH a mixtur as ht
does make, is temptin' to Temperance l~ecterers
lie is an nmazin' nice man. If anything ht
sweetens the last drop better than the first
Good gracious! what a pleasin' creature he is
Ever and anon, the encomiums on the Mnio
and his smixtur' broke forth fromthe old lady, un
Ill Of u sudden, on passing smell rivulet, a iol
Of the mares silenccd them, andthc old man rod,
on a short distance with perfect quictness. A
length he broke out with
sold woman, you and that ere Majors con
duct to-day, was rayther unbeconing; his for
malities was too sweet to be mistook, and you ain
going thar agin in q hurry
Silence was the only answer.
sOh, you're huiiy, are youF continued inc oil
man. SWELL, | guess you con stay so till yo
give in'--and on he joggedin a silent mood. D
arriving at the farm, he called to a servant to lii
the old woman of, but Sam stood gazing at hr
IN silent establishment.
sLiit her of. you Sam do you hcar?-and q
it carefully or some of her wrath'l bile out.
spite of the Majors sweetcning, she's as mad a
blazcsp
Why, do Tor massa, dc ole oman nint dar,
replied Sam, his eyes standing out of his coun
tenance.@J lest turn round, massu, and satisf
yourself dat de ole 'omap CLEAR gone and missiB
--do ok--p
And sure enough, on a minute examination b.
the Oldham, she was found missing The Mn
ior was charged at once with abduction, inston
measures wore taken for pursuit, and a part
despatched 10 sconr tho road On proceodin
about two miles en- tbe road % Inc Majors, Ii