The Columbia Democrat. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1837-1850, 1845-11-01

meet over his bread basket, but it was NJ
sO--lOI with every effort he only increase
tho size Of the bunch Of shirt that slucI
out "a feet between the buttons and button
holes OF The waisiband After exhauslinl
himself in vain attempts to close the open
ing IN his relher garments, he approsChe,
The Doctor, who appeared 10 be asleep ant
after arouslng him, If he could tell wha
had occasioned the sudden disproporioI
between his unmenlionaSles and lha, par
OF his person which now refused 10 be en-
closed in them.
why, yeS!' said The Doctor; rising an,
scru'inlzlng Ned cluseIy-'n is just as pl, il
as the nose on your face-you have beel
drinking and swlIiing, at such rate lately
that just what predicted has come true
you have 60. the dropsy'
Great God! you don', tell me SOL eacu
Ia'ed 'he poor Lieutenant, as he cIaspe d
his hands together and fell back in an arm
chair. oh! Iha. had listened TO your
advice, my dear fellow! Can, you do somt
thing 10 save me!'
I'll Ty' was The reply; but you musl
90 ~ bed keep on low diet, avoid all sum
ulang drinks, al d take such medicines as
| may prescribed
'Thank you, Doctor, will do anything
IN the world to get rld of this horrible dis
ease said Ned, 'and if you will only cure
me, III promise TO stop drinking altogether
doctor, do YOU think | shall have iu be
Iapped!'
1T is impossible 10 say, Ned. but added
The Doctor. 'aa Y On .-. '-
good constitution, | think we may avoid
1ha. operation, provided you keep sIlll and
On your bacA'
Ned followed The Doctors advice strictly,
took smpIes, dieled aud kept on his back /,
willis, The Doctor 81 Ned's brother officers
to whom the joke had been impaired, were
themselves al his expense. Every
day he would receive half dozen visits Vi
coincidence from the subs. OF the garrison
each Of whom would express his sur
Prise al The enlarged state oI Ned 5 cOrpUr
oSly. At the end OF a week, the Doctor
again distracted Ned's breeChes & drawers
had them restored 10 their proportions
repaced by the bedside Of his unOuspec ing
patent; and then told hlm to rise and dres,
himself. So indeed he did ant Ned soCr
ound, 10 his Infinite joy, that his clothes
we're almost Us much too large for him now
as they we're before loo small--al symp
toms Of drop'y having dIsappealed-lhanks
TO the kind altent on Of the Doctor; which
We literally bestowed on him by Ned.
Doctor bound all the officers 10 seCresy and
Ned's droPsy became tho standing joke Of
Iae garrison.
Time passed on, and by accident or de
sign, Ned made the acquaintance Of the laI
4 would not say frall one, whom the Doc
tor employed as seamsIress-Ihe very per
son he had engaged 10 sew up the Lleulen
ants lnexpresslbes matter Of course,
he had not advanced far into her affections
belure she threw out hints that awakened
Neds suspicious, and with lile manage
,nent, he soon possessed himself Of all the
particulars OF The trick that had been played
on him.
No longer having The fear Of death from
dropsy before his syes, Ned relapsed int,
his old HABITS, Just as easy as falling of a
log and the Doctors nightly persecution:
agaid commenced. The temperance lee
lures were renewed, IL the late hair -breadlf
escape was held up before hmm terrorcm
but to no purpose. Neds constant repl,
to all the admonilions OF the Doctor was
"a short and merry one! At times, how
ever, Ned would appear melancholy AM
detected, and would cay to the Doctor, tina
he was tired Of his existence, and that h,
must not be surprised if he put an end It
himself.
About II o'clock one night, after III,
Decor had retired to rest, d. was snoozin
away very comfortably, projected from as
auls OF mosquitoes Gy well tucked pa,l
ion,he was suddenly aroused from his sur
G. Der by McEtnlrdbce Of Ned,who WAS yer
{ much disguised by liquor