Herald of the times. [volume] (Newport, R.I.) 1830-1846, 1845-09-25
lfra@ tie LO@'iO@ Punch.
Mrs. CaudIe's Curtain Lectures.
LECTU RE Al.-lln. Caudle thinks III wonid
IOlk wall 10 keep their Wedding.Day."

YOU guess, darling Next Sunday. dear
Think, love, "a mlnute-JuNt think. Uhdt
and you don't know naw.i la ri hadn
better memory than yoo, | don't know
how we should ever got on. Well, then
pet-shall ] tell you what next Sunday is
Why, then, IT'S our wedding day Wha
are you groaning at, Mr.. Caudlc
don't SEQ anything to groan al. 81 any
body should groan, I'm sue it isn't you
No: rather think Us 1 who ough, I,
.groan
Oh, dear That's fourteen years az o
You were very different man then, Mr.
Caude. What do you say Iwas 4
pery different moman Not at all-ju-I
the same. Oh, you needn't roll youI
head about on The pillow IN that way
say, Just the same. Wen, then, II Pm
altered, whose Fault is it T.? Not mlnr,
Iim sure-ccrtainly not, Don't tell me-
that ! couldn't talk AT all ihen-l could
talk just as well then rs | can now only
then ! hadn't the same cause. It's on
who've made me talk. What de- you
sny You're re,y sorry )orai Caudle,
you do nothing bot Insult me.
Lin you were n good-Iempered, nice
creature fynr'een years ago, and would
have done any thing lor me. Yes, yes, II
woman would be always cared for, she
should never marry. Thete's quite an
end Of the charm when she goes to
church We're all angels while you're
counting US but once married, how soon
you pull our wings off No, Mr.. Cau.
die, Pm not talking nonsense but the
truth ls, you like 10 hear no body talk
but yourself Nobody ever tells me that
! talk nonsense but you Now, rs no
Use your turning and turning about in
that way, it's not II bit Of what do you
say ! KuW get No you won't,
MIR Candle i: you'l not serve me thai
trick again Tor I've locked the door,
and bud the key. There's no getting
hold oi you all the day time but here
y"n can't leave me. You needn't gioan
agnn, Mr.. Cnudlc.
Now, CnudIe, dear, do let us talk |
comfortably. After all, love, there's a
good many folks who, | dare say, don't
get on hall so well as we've done. -
We've both oar lIlc :empers, perhaps
bn' you are aagravalng you must own
mat, Caudlc. We'll, never mlnd we
went talk ol 1t; ! won't scold you row.
Wen talk Of next Sunday, love. We
never have kept our wedding day, and
! think II would be a nee day To have
our friends. What do you say IHcyd
h'nk Il hypocrisy! No hyp"crisy at all.
I'm sure Try To be comfortable and II
ever man was happy, You ought to be-
No, Caudlr, no II isn't nonsense to
kc"p'wcddIng days it isn't deception
"n The world aud II II Is, how many peo-
pie do I'm sure, ~ only proper
compliment that u man owes to his wife
Look AT the Wiuklcs-- don't they give a
dinner every year Well, know, and
II they do fight Il lillle IN the course OF
the t"cl,cnonlhs, that's nothing to do
wllh 1t. They keep their wedding day,
and their acquaintance have nothing To
d" with anything else.
As say, Caudlc, it, only a proper
compliment that "A man owes to his wi.c
I" Keep his wedding day. It's as much
as I" say 10 tho whole world There I
" ''' W. ""'' Wy pfNsNu "liS y
the only woman I'D choose = see moth.
ing to groan at, Mr.. Caudlc-no, or to
sigh at either but | know what you
mean Pm sure, what would have be-
come OF you, If you hadn't married as
you have done Why, you'd have been
u lost creature know 1t | know your
habnS, Caudle and don't like To say
II but you'd have been little better than
a ragamuilin Nice scrnprs you'd have
got INTO know, you hadn't had me for
Il wife. The trouble I've had to keep
YOU rrspcuiabie-and what's my thanks
liza | only wish you'd had some wo-
men
but we won't quarrel, Caudle. No;
You don'l mean anything, | know -
Wen have this lule dinner, eh Just
II few friends : Now don't say you don't h
care-that isn't the way to speak to
wife and especially the wife l've been
TO YOU, Caudle. Well, you agree to the
dlnncr, eh ! Now don't grunt, Mr.. Cau-
die, but speak out. You'll keep your
What u rH let you
go 10 steep ? liza, that's unnanly, Cau- {
wv S"' loo soy ItS "Huoht uny .
hing else say-can'l you say yes
There, bless you knew you would.
And now, CaudIc, what shall we have !
or dinner Move won't talk of it to- .
morrow well talk of it now, aud then i, !
will be off my mind should like some 7
hing Notwithstanding out Of the
'ay-Just To show that we thought the
lay something. should like-Nlr. a
;andle, you're not asleep Uhai 40 I e
'dm Why you know | want TO settle 5,
bout The dinner. Hare Whai IIiko = u
>o ms it's your fancy to keep the day, =
= only right that should try to please p
"n. We never had one, CaudIe so e
hat do you think OF haunch Of venison! Al
hai do YOU say Nonsense mutton -
MI do Tia that shows what you think
1 jour wife J dare say if 1t was with
ny oi your club frIends-any of your
''- h'us" r"rpar'ons-you'd have no
Injection TO venison. / say if--wha,
% you muiter Let Il be penison p Y
lery well. And now about the fish p ]
What do you think of a nice turbut No, 10
lr. Caudle brill won't dot shall be y" y"