Boon's Lick times. [volume] (Fayette, Mo.) 1840-1848, 1845-06-21
MRS. CAUDLE'S CURTAIN
LECTURES.

Maid-Mrs. G. jealous and indignant.
A pretty pass things have come to, Mr..
Caudle. Men won't know who are their
own wives by and by. So, your skylarks
are not enough to take your attention from
your wife, but you must be saying soft
things to our d-of-all-works You say
you didn't say you did. You need not
think to deceive me, Caudle. see it all.
so it is, that you, the father of lovely
family, and the husband of devoted wife,
should whisper to the maid. But you did,
Mr.. Caudie. I-say-you--did You
didn't Was ever man so deceitful! What
is your word worth, Mr.. Caudle, when
you lie RICH, into my face? But the maid
shall bulge, won't keep her another day.
She shall 60 bag and baggage, if l have
to do all her work myself. Lord knows
l work hard enough as it is. But l won't
have that wench about the house. Poor
girl you say? Well, there now, that is as
much as to own it. You wouldn't say
poor girl, Mr.. Caudle, if you wasn't in love
with her. Its no use. / see how it is.
Poor girl, indeed should like to know
who is to support your girls, who don't
know where they belong, or how they be-
have themselves. We women work and
drudge Just to see our maids of-work do
nothing but whisper with our husbands.
But III not endure it Caudle. You say
hold my tongue. A pretty figure l should
make holding my tongue, and you whisper
ing all the time with my maid.
l tell you again it is no use for you to
deny it. I see the guilt in your face. Or,
should see it if there was a light in the
room. The more shame for you, for blow
ing out the candle so long before you got
into bed. Men don't blow out candles,
unless they have something to be ashamed
of. But I'll not endure it. III 90 home to
my mother, Mr.. Caudle. No, won't I'll
discharge that maid first. Poor girl, again?
Do you say that Caudle? You would pro-
woke saint. But III have my revenge.
I'll tear the house down about your ears.
Well see then who'll whisper to the maid.
Nothing good comes of whispering. l
should like 10 know what honest folks want
to whisper about. don't whisper? You
may well say that. Indeed l don't. /
wish l could speak with thunder. You
wouldn't pretend TO sleep. I'd wake all
the sleep out of you.
And next we shall have an elopement.
Don't say fool, Mr.. Caudle. Nobody's a
fool except for marrying you. ] say we
shall have an elopement, and you'll be put
in all the papers. Richard Caudle, Esq.
gone off with his servant maid, leaving a
lovely and disconsolate wife and three
children. The maid not handsome either.
say not handsome, Mr.. Caude. Wouldn't
that be fine story for the rising generation
to read? You say you ,OiU elope if don't
hold my tongue. l say you shan'l elope-
and won't hold my tongue. It's not
often that l use it, goodness knows. I'll
watch you, III follow you to the ends of
the earth like poor, patient, abused wife,
as l am. But you shan't 60; III tear the
girls eyes out first. And you shantt 60 to
sleep either. You only pretend TO be asleep.
| know when mans asleep. You needn't
snore so, for / don't hear it. / don't
snore--I don't Shore.
Here Mrs. Caudle's clamshel closed from
very WEAKNESS, and she slept.
UNITED STATES STEAMER SpRNcER.-The
government cutter,recently ordered to Phil.
adeIphia, to have her propeIers changed
from the Hunter principle to that Of the
Lopez, left that city on Thursday morning
for New York, under the command of Cap
tain Fraser. A party Of gentlemen, among
whom were the Hon. G. M. Dallas, Hon.
Charles J. Ingersoll, Mr.. s. V. Merrck,
Captain Lopez, Commodore Elliott, Captain