The daily union. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1845-1857, 1845-05-05
THE CURTAIN LECTURES.

THE CURTAIN LECTURES.
i We are anxious to diversity our columns by the
occasional introduction of miscellaneous articles to
turn from the great staple of politics to the lighter en-
Refreshments of literature, science and the arts from
"grave to gay"--the rest of the quotation ssfrom
serious to severe" does not so well suit the purpose
in hand. And where can we meet anything more
gay and badnage than the Curtain Lectures of Mrs.
Caudle, of the London Punch' Many Of them have
been circulated in various papers throughout our
country. Several of them have appeared in the
Globe; but we fatter ourselves "The Union
may extend its circulation to a considerable dis
heard Of the celebrated Mrs. Caude, we will risk
their republication in our rising sheet
Curtain Lectures, At the very sound of the omi-
nous epithet, the hen-pecked husband lifts up his
ears, and his heart rembles; and here we can assure
him, they are finished off in the highest STYLE No
subject escapes the ingenuity of the ermagant Mrs.
Caudle. She is constantly laying her trembling
consort upon the bed Of torture. But these lectures
may be readily parodied to suit the occasion. The
querulous husband might turn the tables upon his
imperturbablc wife; yet happens, from some cause
other, that the curtan-ecture system seems to be
peculiarly appropriate to the feminine gender Their
original author in punch, or the London Chari-
vari," was the unfortunate Lamar Blanchard Since
his unmely death, and that of his wife, the lectures
were continued, after the first six, by another hand
From the London Punch.
MRS. CAUDLE'S CURTAIN LECTURES.
LECTURE /.
Mr. Cnidle has lent tipe pounds to friend
"You ought TO be very rich, Mr.. Caudle won
per who'd lend you FIVE pounds! But so it is; a
wife may work and may slave! Ha dear the many
things that might have been done with FIVE pounds!
As il people picked up money in the street! I've
wanted a black satin gown these three years, and
five pounds would have pretty well bought it, But
It's no matter how go--not at all. Every body
says | don't dress as becomes your wife-and L
know i: but what's that to you, Caudle, Nothing
On no. you can have fine feelings for every body
but those belonging to you. wish people knew
you as do-that's all You like to be called lib
eral--and your family pays for it.
"Al the girls want bonneis, and when they are
to get 'em can't tell. Half FIVE pounds would have
bought ,em-but now they must 60 without. OF
own flesh and blood, Mr.. Caudle
The man called for the water-rate, to-day; but |
should like to know how people are to pay taxes
who throw away five pounds to every fellow that
asks t, mem.
rernaPs you cont know that Jack, this morning,
a : ms shatuecock through the bedroom win
dow. was going to send for glazer to mend it:
but after you lent the five pounds was sure we
could NJ AFFORD II. oh no! the window must go it
IS; and pretty weather for dear child to sleep with
broken window He's got cold already on his
ungs, ana shouldn't at all wonder if that broken
window settled him if the dear bow dies his death
Will De upon his fathers head; for I'm sure VIC can't
now pay to mend windows. We might, though,
hsa'.' $500 Icy ilole ,hh'ss' people uid nj
"iow away 'helr nVe POUNDS
Next Tuesday, the fire insurance is due. /
should like to know how it is to be paid. Why, it
ant DE PAID at all. The hve pounds would have
ust done ~ and now, insurance is out of the ques-
ION, And there never were SO many fires as there
IRE now. shall never close my eyes all night; but
what's that to you, so people call you liberal, Mr.
Jaudle' Your wife and children burnt alive in their
'eds-so all of US to certainty shall be- for the in
urance must drop. And after we've insured for so
many years! But how, should like to know, are I
,eople to insure, who make ducks and brakes of
heir five pounds
al did think we might eo 10 Maroate this ann
ner There's poor little Caroline. I'm sure she
wants the sea- But no. dear creature she n,ust
tay at home; she'll 90 into Consumption there's no
oubt of that; YES. dear tle angel, I,ys roade ~
Nv mind to lose her now. The child mich, Nave
cen saved but people can't save their children and
nrow away their five pounds, too.
az wonder wbere NOR l;,,l. r,h..,L :, x.y,:,.
on wore lend;ng ,h.t =. ,sa,Sn e .a', 10 hne
the sbon Va, Lnau oas. =. 'o !, uos Ia' uu'
rect for fea, !, should ". IL nete. go mo tne
nd come home and b,s IN ,ho o,;i ,iau w Z
louldn't now Al ali nstonisb me ;S ,he an,,ai ,,.
, come back with the hvdronhobia and g;ys /, 20
\ the family Howevcr vha,,s ,one En,;I,, -
GU. SO Won can NAV The liberal c,sa,,ro ,a;,h e.
ounds' d
an 90, 49, ~ 49,. -. II