The Cadiz sentinel. [volume] (Cadiz, Ohio) 184?-1851, 1845-07-02
WIT AND HUMOR.
Peel and POIk.-BY ]. r. ORroy.

IL
Your Yankee way of POking fun,
You've Poked from us our fairest realms
You'd Poke US out of Oregon.
Our lion roars- Just see him grin!
| fear cannot hold him in.
Says Polk 10 PEEL, much regret
To stir your bile, or chafe John Bull,
But # you'll come across the seas
To Peel us of our land or wool*-
Your lion heretofore has 8quea1ed,
And may, next time get POked and Peeled.
*Cotton wool; in alusion to the desire of En-
gland to get up rival cotton interest in Texas.
All flesh is grass, in scripture truth we're grave
ly told
Applied to ALL it might be true in days of old
But in modern times it will meier be forgotten,
That woMEN's flesh is chiefly turned to COTTON.
That's q saucy thing. Some old bachelor
liksfy.--Cincinnati Eng.
LINES WRITTEN IN BANKERS ALBUM.
A little thieving is dangerous part,
But thieving largely is a noble art!
'Tis vile to rob corn crib of an ear,
Bot thieving largely makes the financier
An EpigrGm.-We find the following floating
about, like Japhet in search of q parental guar
dian, and as it contains as much truth, as many
a hen-pecked husband can testify, as poetry, we
will help to keep it floating:
Women were born, as fate declares,
To smooth our linen and our cares,
And It's butjust, for by my troth,
They are very apt TO ruffe both.
One of our exchange papers mention the case
of woman who is SO large around the waist that
her husband cannot hug her all at once, but when
he takes one hug makes chalk mark, so as to
know where to commence the next time going
around.
Worldly Wisdom.-"Do you take a newspa-
per?' "Yes." "What one?" "Any one
can lay my hands on"
"What did you give for that horse?" inquired
the facetous Mr.. s., as he was riding BY "My
note," was the significant reply, ''wasn't that
cheap enough?''
When man is too poor to keep COW, he
ought not to keep more than four dogs and five
cats.
Good Farming.-''Wall, sambo, is your mas
} ter good farmer?"
90, yes, my massa, he be berry good farmer
: he make two crops in one year."
"Hows that, Sambo?"
"Why, he sell his hay in de fall, and make mo.
ney once; den in de spring, he sell de hides Of
} de cattle dat die for want ob de hay, and make
: money twice"
Scripture for IA distinguished writer SAYS
-"Ihere is but one passage in the Bible where
the girls are commanded TO kiss the men; an(
that is in the golden rule, "Whatsoever ye woulc
that men should do unto you, do you even so tc
them"
4 will give you my head if you are not wrong,
| exclaimed dull and warm orator TO the Presi
: dent Montesqueu, in argument. II will accept
| replied the philosopher, "any trifle among friends
, has its value"
, Already retor.-A drunken lawyer going into
church, was observed by the minister, who ad
: dressed him thus: II will bear witness aoans
: that sinner at the day of judgment" The law
i yer, shaking his head with drunken gravity, re
plied-"l have practised twenty years at thu
bar, and have always found that the creates
: rascal is the first to turn States evidence"
Very Pcculiar--Conversng one day with
fashionable and pretty belle, the facetious L.
t observed, that the "lades that lisped wished II
= be kissed" The young lady had before spokel
IS unatlectedly, replied, "IHo I've heard hay"
IS A little boy, after listening to sermon OF
? the necessity of being born again, returned hom
d much afflicted, and said to his mother, ddn'
G like the sermon, and ma, don't like TO be bor
8 over again, for who knows but l might be gal
g. Omit being reported in party of ladies', tha
e a Captain Silk had arrived in town, they exclam
If ed, with one exception, "What a name for sol
e dierw "The fttes name in the world" reion
e ed witty female, "SiM can never be rorSted 81