The Columbia Democrat. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1837-1850, 1845-04-05
HONEY RUN
An Amusing story of Western life

Ichsnce Of legs, there, any how'-Judg
D0ugdSs' Story.
The gentleman from Illinois Is nc
the only gentleman whose legs have le
Ihim into embarrassment! A pollIlca
friend of ours, equally happy in hi
manners if not in his party, among III
Missouri constituency found hlmsel
while csnvsssing the Stale last sum
mer, for Congress, in even NOR
peculiarly ptrpleSlngpredics men' thar
the Illinois Judge.
There is spot in The Southwestern
lparl OF this State, known as The FterJ
Forh ofHOney Run!-'delC'ousI local
Ity no doubt, as The fuu Of 'honey' Il
f course accompanied by correspond
np flow OF milk and mixture OF mIII
ADD honey, or, al any rate, honey and
peach is lhe evidence Of sublunary
conlenlmen', every place where the.
have preaching!
Honey Run' is further Chr's'Isnlzec
w The presence of an extremely hospl.
,ole family, whose mansion, comprising
me upartment-ne'her more nor less
is renowned for being never shut a.
ssnst the traveller, and so our friend
found it during the chill morning air,
rhc expense Of rheumatism in hi
shoulder, its numerous unaffected crack :
md spaces clearly showing that drop
ping the latch was an useless lormaIIly.
The venerable host and hostess, in theil
one apartment, Usually enjoy the society
# two sons, four daughters, sundry
dogs aud 'niggerS,' and as many lodger'
IS may deem i, prudent 10 risk tn"
,omewha, eqwvocal allotment of sleep
log partners. On the nigh,'in question
our friend, after hearty supper OF ham
md eggs, and canvass of the Fiery
ForksrS, the old lady having pointed
nul his bed, felt very weary, and only
looked Cor an opportunity 20 'urn in,
though the mosquitoes were NumP'ng
II sorts of wrath, and no net appeared
bar them. The dogs huag lhemselve'
along the floor, or again rose, res'IessIy.
and sought The door step; The 'niggers'
tuck their fee: ia the yet warm ashe..
he old man stripped, un'crupuousl y.
nd sought his share Of the one colIap'
-d-Iooking pillow, and the sons, caval'
cry, followed his example, leaving the
Did woman, gals and stranger TO set.
tie any question OF deIicacy that nigh
alse.
The caudi date yawned, looked at hi,
bed, went 10 the door, looked at tn
flea lily, in downright reck
essness, he seated hlmSe If upon 'lh'
Jowuy,' and pulled of his coat. Wei
ne pulled of his cosl--aod he folded hn
cosl-and then he yawned--and Iher
whis,led and then he called The old
lady's attention 10 The fact, that it wonIc
never do to sleep in his muddy 'row
sers-and then lie 'undId' his vest--snc
then he whi,tIed again--and then, sud
denIv, an idea of her Iodger's embar
rsssmen, seemed 10 flush upon The oIG
woman, and she cried
'GalS, jest turn your backs round Ill
he stranger gus into bed
The backs were turned, and III,
stranger did ge, into bed in 'less thar
no time, when the hostess again spoke
Reckon stranger, as you aint used I,
us, s,you'd better kirer up TIL gals undres
hadn't your
By this time our friends sleepy Fl
was over, and though he did 'kiver up,
as desired, some how or other, The old
was equally kind in hidin.
his blushes, and fsvoriug his ely glanccs
The nymphs were soon slowed away,
for there were neither bus,Ies TO unhllcI
nor corse,s 10 unace when THEN man
ma, evidently anxious not to smotheI
her guest, considerably relieved him:
you can unkiver now, stranger; Pn
married folks, and you sln'I afeared o
me | reckOun
The stranger happened to be 'marriet
folks himself: he unkivered and turn
ed his back with tue connubial indiff
erence. as far as The ancient lady wa
concerned, but, with regard 10 lh
lgaiS,' he declares that his hslf-raise,
curiosity inspired the most lormeuIinl
DIRE ms Of mermQids that he ever expe
|renced. .-H. Louis ReviNe.
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