Sentinel of the valley. [volume] (Woodstock, Va) 1841-1848, 1845-05-01
Short Patent Serrllan.
The following lines, by Lucy, viii
compose my text for this occasion:

Z The following lines, by Lucy, will
compose my text for this occasion:
How diflidens the beaux have grown.
In fact they re perfect chnrls;
Such shameful coldness now is shown,
They never squeeze the girls.
b. But females have devised plan.
In lieu of these cold elves,
They now % shame upon you man,
= With corsets squeeze themselves. Z
My hearers--A poo. excuse is gen
orally acknowledged 10 be better than
none; bat the excuse that Lucy gives
for girls making insects of themselves,
is almost too weak to bear up the
weight of a serious consideration. If
the girls suppose that our young men
have grown so selfish and churly as to
care nothing about giving an OCCASION
al affectionate squeeze, they surely must
be ignorant of the nature Of these BIZ
peds. They may not squeeze so much
nor so often as the fair candidates for
being squeezed might wish, for the
good, reason that the latter too frequent
ly love to tan.alize a poor fellow by
throwing out special invitations, and
3 tlIen run away for the sake of being run
after. Blu; my friends, just give a
young chap a fair chance at a pretty
girl, and if he doesn't give her such a
hug as to make her think patent bed
screw was put to her, I'll forego my
faith in all mechanical operations l
belong to the masculine gender myself
and know something about this matter
by experience. l am a perfect steel
trap IN my way. Let female just rub
against my breast pin, with fond look
IN her eye, and my arms don't remain
inspiring for more than halfa moment
at the longest. 1t all nonsense girls
to complain Of not being sufficiently
squeezed. If they would put them
selves in the way ofbeingfondly press
ed, they wouldn't have to wait long for
the qualification other desires. This
is the case in the town where lifelong,
and have no doubt it is the same all
the world over.
My dear girls-I like to see a small
waist aswell as any body: and females
with hour glass shapes always suit my
fancy much better than your Dutch
ehurn soap-barrel, slab-sided sort of
figures; but ! don't wantth credit Civ
en- TO corsets. To nature and to nature
alone, belongs allthe praise. In sooth,
lovely girls, that portion of your fair
persons which you are the most apt to
torture, is the most tender, and you can
never NEEDLE with it with impunity.-
1t is ofyital Importance that it should
remain exactly as the God of nature
has formed it. BY squeezing your
waist INTO an unnaturally small circum-
ference, you compress your lives into
the narrow compass of a few short
years-you don't give the belloweses
in your bosoms chance to blow, and
keep bright the flames of existence
the warm glow of health soon leaves
your cheeks,o or flashes by fits and starts,
like half choked gas burner-your
eyes in a short time cease to sparkle
with joy and love-your roses of beauty
quickly fade and fall-you look as dull
and worn out as an old moon in the
morning, and pale and sickly as sun
light strained through the windows of
a Catholic cathedral. Now, my inter.
esting young creatures what do you
gain by all your self-squeezing: You
improve in appearance, as you think,
one paIt of yourperson to the detriment
of another--at sacrifice Of health and
those roseate charms that bloom upon
your youthful features-and the face
certainly is the most attractive part of
the female form divine. 4
My dearly beloved and interesting
young females--it is absurd for you to
defend the tight lacing system with the
plea that you are not sufficiently squeez-
ed by the beaux,l for verify believe,
that, were they tohug you every day
with strength of affection equal to
forty-horse power, you would lace just
as Highland perhaps tighter. The
only good excuse you can offer is this:
most, and may say all, young men
admire small and delicate WASTES
pecially when based upon a broad and
solid foundation; and, as it is in accor-
dance with your natures to "study to
please" it must be expected that great
sacrifices will be made to merit their
appreciation. The principal fault and
blame therefore, belong to them, while
the weakness and folly are yours. AS
Tar as my taste is concerned, however
/ can't say that l am liable to be fasci-
mated with those dyspeptic misses from
whose systems the cruel corsets seem
ed to have pressed almostevery particle
ofllfe, vigor and animation. No
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