Port Tobacco times, and Charles County advertiser. (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1845-1898, 1845-06-26

so like you, Caudle.
I'm Arrays aranting money for czothes9
How can you lie in your bed and say that?
Pm sure there's no children in the world
that cost their father so little; but that's it,
the<less poor woman does upon, the less
Eshe may. It's the wives who don't care
where the money comes from, who're best
thought Of. Oh, if my time was:'to come
lover again, would | mend and stitch, and
make the things 60 as far as have done !?
No-that wouldn't. Yes, it's very well
for you to lie there and laugh, Caudle-
very easy, to people who don't feel
Now, Caudle dear! What a man you
are | know you'll give me the money,
after all. think yon love your children,
and like to see 'em well dressed. It's only
natural that father should. Eth, Caudle,
eh? Now, you shan't 60 to sleep till you
Why, let me see, love. There's Caroline,
and Jane, and Susannah, and Mary Ann,
Iand-What do you say? Ineedn't count
'em' you kao1O hoao many there are? Ha !!
that's just as you take me up. Well, how
much money will at take? Let me see :;
and don't 60 to sleep. I'll tell you in
minute. You always love to see the dear
things like new pins, know that Caudle :;
and though say it-bless their little hearts!
they do credit 10 you, Caudle. Any no.
bleman of the land might be proud of 'em.
Now, don't swear at noblemen Of the land,
and ask me what they've to do with your
children; you know what meant. But
you are so hasty, Caudle.
Ho1o much9 Now don't be in hurry !?
Well, I think with good pinchin'-and you
know, Caudle, there's never a wife who
can pinch closer than | CAM think, with
pinching, can do with twenty pounds
What did you say? Iacenty 6ddzesticks9
What? You aron't giUe half the money!
Very well, Mr.. Caudle, don't care; let the
children 60 in rags; let them stop from
church, and grow up like heathens and
cannibals, and then you'll save your money,
and, suppose, be satisfied. You gaze me
tacenty pounds, fee months ago? What's five
months ago TO do with now? Besides.
what hare had is nothing to do with it.
I What Go you say Ten pounds are
r7rUUyhs iir.e+-lil<a-szau- men: you
think things cost nothing for women; but
you don't care how much you lay out upon
yourselves. They only acant 6onnets and
.trocks9 How do you know what they
want? And you won't give more than
ten pounds. Very we'll. Then you may
60 shopping with it yourself, and see what
you'll make of it. don't arant to dress
The children up like countesses? You often
fling that in my teeth, you do; but you
know it's false, Caudle; you know it.
only want to give 'em proper notions of
themselves; and what, indeed, can the poor
things think when they see them as fine as
tulips? Why, they must think themselves
nobody -depend upon it, Caudle-it's the
way to make the world think anything of you.
What do you say? Where did I pick
Iup Mat9 Where do you think? know a
great deal more than you suppose-yes
though you don't give me credit for it.
Husbands seldom do. However, the twenty
pounds aciU have, if I've any-or not a
larthng.
No, sir, no! I don't acant to dress up
the children like peacocks and parrots! ]
only want to make 'em espectable-What
do you say? You'll giUe fifteen pounds2
No, Caudle, no! Not penny will take
under twenty; if ] did, it would seem as if
wanted to waste your money; and Pm
sure, when | come to think of it, twenty
pounds will hardly do. Still, if you'll give
me twenty-no, it's no use your offering
fifteen, and wanting to 60 to sleep. You
shan't close an eye until you promise the
twenty. Come, Caudle, love Twenty ::
and then you may 60 to sleep. Twenty
twenty-twenty-
"My impression is,' writes Caudle, in
his comments, "that ] fell asleep, sticking
firmly to the fifteen; but in the morning
Mrs. Caudle assured me, as a woman of
honor, that she wouldn't let me wink an
eye before promised the twenty, and as
man is fral-and woman is strong-she
had the money"
Mr.. Caudle purchases and sends home a
I" Pet Monkey" The consequences !
thereof
Now Caudle-in the name Of all that's
hideous-what do YOU intend to do with
that ugly ape you se1t here to-day? Isn't
it enough, CaudIe that we should have the
mouths we h9|e to feed already, but you
must souasder money upon geological
ouadrupeds? Not q quadrWped9 What is
it then? There, Caudle, now you needn't
"henn'-you havn't got cough-its all
> sham and should like to know what's