The New era. [volume] ([Portsmouth, Va.]) 1845-1847, 1845-09-16
From the New York Mirror.
TABLE LECTURES.
By a LADY CONTRIBUTIONS.
NO. n.


MIR. Is il, Mrs. T.eatherhpad2 / wonder
who knows best / set my watch by the town
c'""k and that is always right to a second.
Ms. L.-Evrepting yesterday. Mr. Leather.
neal; yon then thIngr it very m,ch am Of
the way; but the dinner is raiy-sh,ll Peter
rim! the hell
Mr.. l. Ring the bell Is the woman crazy
why. don't ym kn"w that two uf nv friends are
I" d,"e here! trld you SO az breakfast.
MIS- L-Indr.d ynu did not mn merely said
y"u m'ghf hrlnI company honr To diuner but no
ina ter--'he dinner is nicely c,mkrd. and Peter
can easily put rU"ple m IRE plates the table.
Mr.. L-Nn. Mrs. LeatherheaI, he can wait
I'll Mr. Prlnge and Mr.. r ,ddlr cam, g. Let
hp'n see how affairs go at hume Lei them
See 'ila d. not sleep IN bed al roses and now
my f'r Peter. and let the f., cunp n, At once.
f"h ne-'i MT s'are in that way, Mrs Leather.
head. n II you never heard "f a mans ordering
MS dinner L. h. brought up.
Mrs. L.-Would il not he b.tter q, wait 6av
moments until your friends arrlv-2 Yw CERTAIN.
| " I'D them ,''r ,r
Mr. NO. shall not wait. THEY sha,, q q
what p"r henp-rk-d creature I am; and IL hey
lose their dinner by rnistakng the hon. iiey
I'll take care Ia encourage better ne,nn = -
ex; time. That's the cod. il il 2 Yes. The c..k
AS sa,'rd u with vengeance; all fl king OPEN
! ke dried salt cN and where il the .yp = uc. 2
% slt.Ty
sauce az you must know. What. have Won epy
| likewise. Heavens! how much all ". men are
alike! D'y"u think that make sal much IN, my
that can ait 'rd I" have iwo kinds If ssnce to n
snail cad >" you call il a large c,,d do You 2
N" matter. ! must resign myself TO thu expense.
Pm the egg sauce on this SIDE. unless Mrs
Lratherhead prefers it there. NJ. M. P4,.r. let
II remain where il isl * tor il, it Ipref.r
II Ia the celery sauce. and
Ire NJ.
ing while YIN eat, for | am half beside myself.
mt yen see that you have been helped To- ego
sauce. and Pleniifuly. ton A. To tn. celery
sauce. II was only what was left nf y'-strniay I
had 1t warmed up ior myself. ihink,n. that-
MIR L.-Oh. yes. Mrs Leah.rheai, you. We Q
thinking. You women are always thinking: aud
/ dare say that the pur children are 10 eat that
stale, rancid sauce } You never ran remember
That child has MT the stomach of an ostrich.
it''n"ve IN" hSh, Peter o, beg ynnr pardon,
Mrs. Leathrrhead; | thunghI YIN had fiaishrd.
Hhnt! yon hare not begun yet AMI why did
yon nut begin Yam ,rere preparing The chill
dreh's d'nnerI Thought they were To have the
lamb chops. You are as changesble as the wind.
| ms in"rnng y"u th"nghi fish UNIV Wholesome. 4
told you that they should eat fish? wonder at
you my dear! Why. expressly gave in tn yonr
wishes about the lamb chops. But furgnt 10
mention that ordered snri,e cherry tarts. Yow
'~'' ''S wy """y Op'H my iiie tnat was
preiiy Joke What are we tuh,ve fur desert p
Cherry pudding! WIN ever heard of cherry
pudding YOU are mistaken, my u",her never
made cherry pudding they we're cherry DUNG
l.nss Oh yom meant cherry dnmplnys -
Then Why dld y"u nul say Half my time,
When am al hnIr. is spent. in unravplling Your
plumbers of speech. Ii Won tn a,ght clearly yon
would speak clearly. Hold my tongue and eat.
my dinner! Well, Mrs Leaiherhra., you are
"A lEu and
"alsicoast! That cnnas of king the sauce 30
thin; j complainant Of It's being too ihirk, r.
d'dF Pray when VAS that--no, to day, certain.
", kr-ih re-run Peter. dare 81, that the
iw" gentlemen are coming. Was there ever.
such table. and the cod il cold. Send away
the two girls. bni let Ned stay. What! you are
g'"d they are going? ! bring tn think Mrs.
L"aiherhead. that yoI are an unnatural moiher.
IN" are hat crazy ure yon, and IF you dared,
y"" 'oo"'df ro'o q tumbier IF ,caier az myJace!
! - lhat what you said oh 20, If you ch,n,se--
leave the table by all means, and pray vet tho
children against their faher-hat would BIZ all
| ~ ch,racier Only the icr cart Step after
WIS i1rathrThead, Peter and tell her To pay tho
'iah-she has no money did she say abe had
n" m"ney, Peter? why but no mttter, tell
/ me man &" call Tomorrow at my Office Here
1'F"' mold your plate for slice u bacon. Mother
says you must not eat BACON To day, Why nut D.
~" 80 wv Ia" "g'IUSt eating h3cnD on thursdays.
vi. you nave th"nght heller of il, and have c,nns
"'IS' MIS-. Lta'hrrhead. pretty example Won
SRI you, OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES, you shall only spoil
the g,TIS' f"r As s'mn Ned and Bub are old
'n""gh' 'hey shall go Ia harding chuol. Dom,
Whisper to the hoy when I am talking 10 him.
n'm dIh not know that was speaking tn him :,
r'dy' was speaking To the chairs; hut miuht
is "e'l' irr any thing that ran see. Hold nv
tongue! This is t~ Ice that you hs ve made tina,
"nclVh speech. Leave the table, Ned, i, ia not
proper i"r y"n 10 sit by and hear your father
a"lSpd. Thank you, Mrs. Lea,herhpad, Won
'or"w The water in my Iare! l. that what ven
,nnpered-who would have the worst of i, 2 for
should have. To change nv rlthhes These are
,he CHERRY dunplings. are th.y2 III said cherry
meant hlackb' rry--and so am disa ppuinted NJ
, ny desert. tor WON'T raj snch bullets az these
why d"n'i TRY them ? Yes might try them.
/ " 'hey were blarkbprries. On, half Of them are
''acNhefrIFS, are they2 Well-why did YOU not
''P","n IT, and now that recnlleot right it was
"'Fo r"rran' dumPlIngs. What ynu once made
| 'nPh' and would not touch me of them7 If
n'u not then, they must have been exerrable.
"r-"p"n my life. she has thrown iurnbler IF
wafer ~ my fare, and left the roorn-this comes
/" getting marrIPd--I must take IF Inv crayat
ana wastcoal. hui meant to do it, and sus
peel the gIpsey knew it. this is the first time she