The Columbia Democrat. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1837-1850, 1844-05-11
ZlI0SLsIhlhNIAO
From Noah's Weekly Messenger.
MY FIRST & LAST LOVE AFFAIR
By WILLIAM BURNS.

believe the admission general; thai,
no boy passes his nineIeelh years with.
out having experienced, at least one ten
der and 'clerral,' (oE conrse) passion,
e. that very few girls get fairly through
heir sixteenth year scalheless of io.
mantle love. The teder sentiment l..
'pecIlar to the teens, and is sonnet hing
| Ike the mumps and meaSes-it comes
only once in a lifetime.
Just as was entering the last half OF
ny nine'eelh year. (it matters no, how
oog ago that was) & beginning 10 think
Of whskers, tobacco and other modern
'vidences of manhood, fell desperately y
IN love. | know at the time that it wa,
the maddest thing in The world 10 vol
UNFAIRLY yield myself up to passion
which is very cleverly carcaInred bv
French cooks, when they put live fowl
before slow fire and roast it gradually
for the purpose Of swelling the heart ;ouD
show me youth who listens to reason,
II he had any when his head and hear
nnd other 'lIxins' are in a broil Of Ten
Iderncss. devotion and romance, and
confess 'ha, was greater fool than
the majority of my sex and age.
The course of my love- ran smoothly
enough for a while; 5u, this did not de.
ceive mel knew | should get 10 the
rapids and whirlpooIs t o soon for my
own comfort. was like the drunken
Indian in The csnm above the falls Of Nj.
igara, | just took drAughls of dsliciou.
nectar, and allowed the little shallop oi
my fate TO take its own way and make
the best bIrgain il could with the trea,h
erouS waves. My resignation, however
l lid moi make my sulIeringS the lighter
the crisis came stood on the edge oil
the precipice-- looked pleously sroun'
for help--I Shrleked in the most pathe.
lftc and romantic tones, but il would no
10, over | went, into the maddcnint
food | felt for and Instant ,ha, it wa,
all up with me-lnd then there was :
blank.
When | awoke again I found mseli
in bed very weak and very wretched
The doctor told me that had heer
hreatened with inflammation of tn,
brain, bat that o rheumatic fever hac
stepped in instead. What co4d bllI
o romance. | who was dying of broI.
On hear, 10 be labelled Thumait'-l
| hated the man from the moment anc
wore to be reveuged, and | have KEEP
my oath-his bill is unrecepicd yet,
My young readers-a and | am now
writing especially 10 them, will know
what the foregoing means without furlh.
er explanation ;but les, some sore crabb.
ed old maid or fussy old bachelor, should
accuse me Of putting nonsense in type,
will Just add in plain terms that after o
most tender season of love, which com.
menced in the warm months and lasted
ill the cold, was very politely inform
I'd, by very polite mother that | was
'wtld rake, an unprincipcd lberrine,
and that she looked upon my attention.
her daughter with displcasurc. Here
vas ddmper | a rake! who haG
never dared 10 read certain chapters H.
The old testament, for fear of knowing
more than a modest young man should!l
a lIberline, who had never looked in .
Ilady'S face without bluShins! The chsrg'
islcnished me; The virluoUs surface with
less reason was not more indignant ;bur
tslonishmenl and indignation did NO
good; both ended, as before, with the
IrheBmaliSm.
" hen recovered, a most devoted
friend of che parlies'handed me pretty
hree cornered note, The seal of which,
while wax, Of course represented two
nearis, very barbarously run through
with skewer 1t Uhe mole moi the
Skewer)was from my own ore, and was
| full of tender ierms-'broken hearts,
crushing Affections 'blgh,sd hopes
poignant regrets. 'undying love- &C.,
&C., &c.; every body knows how these
strong expressions are sprinkled in. The
p. S. put new life into me. II ran
| llhuS.
Love laughs at locksmilhs. Come TO
my window that looks into the little
garden a, 10 tonight. In seating the
wall look out for the broken glass hat is
embedded on the top; and don'l forgei
10 put beef steak in your pockets TO
Ipo2iry The dog, if he should attack you,