Rutland herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1823-1847, 1844-05-02
EccentricitieS Of a Mailman.

Mr.-, a lawyer in Vt, doing good bust.
mes, once became insane and took into his head to
abandon the practice of law, and engage in basket
making He was at first very awkward hand
atthis employment but, by dint Of perseverance,
he soon became very skilful and could weave a
basket as well as he formerly wove an argument,
at the bar. He followed this business about six
months, when taking new notion into his head,
he abandoned it for that of chair bottoming.
The materials used in this occupation was bark,
which he stripped IN the summer when it peals
most easily Having come home one day COW
cred with mud, he was asked where he had been.
that he had got so thoroughly bedaubed Hc an
swered, that he had been in neighboring swamp
after elm bark, of which he exhibited a strip about
forty feet long
do you mark this p said he triumphan,ly.
sYes but how does this account for you being
so muddy2 1t isn't TO find mud on the top of
trees
! mo; but sometimes you may find it in the boz:
tom, though. I'll tell you how l found il.
cut the bark near the root Of the tree, and then
striped it upwards, expecting il would come to an
end and break of, and run itself out after while
I But it hung on like a suit in chanccry-and
sript and sript, until up forty feet strong
as ever. Thinks Ito myself there's no use in
persuing the thing any farther, and SO I'll enter
|
what had done-tbat was the point to be decided
l wished at least to save cost-but pashawl
forgot-Tm not lawyer now. Well as was
saying, looked at the subject to see how I could
secure the bark. 1t was to strong for me to
break off, AT any rate thought l. there's more
than one way to skin cat, as the butcher would
say If | cannot break off this bark can climb
up by it. seized hold of the strip and placed
my feet against the trunk of the tree and
run up hand over hand. BY this method of climb
ing, you will perceive my back must have been
downward and nearly in n horizontal position -
my feet being braced against the tree, and my
head standing from it in an angle Of forty degrees.
Having arrived at the proper hight was then in
a qnandary how 10 get my knife out ofmy pocket
and how 10 get it open when it was out III lei
60 with one hand, was fearful The other would
not hold me. However. says |, it's neck or moth
ing. I'll try the experiment at any rate-so
grippcd powerfully with my left hand, while
took out my knife with my right hand, and open
ing it with my teeth, whipped off the bark as
clean as the law would dock an entail.
'And what do think was the result2
| why you came flat on your back of course
! Right gentlemen of the jury-a very correct
verdict indeed. came down fiat in the mud -
never was client laid hauer on his back than |,
and never was one so completely bedaubed with
filth and mud. But thanks to the yielding nature
ofthe soil, saved my DO mes and only brought a
way the mischief on my coat gained my cause
too-which is more than can say ofall my IN
dertakings'
/ The company laughed heartily at the ex-law
yers account Of his exploi-when the latter, hang
! ing his coat up in the sun, said, that the mud like
the old womans grease, would rub of when it
was dry
He continued while longer TO follow his &C
cupatlon Of his chair boltomng when suddenly
becoming sane again be resumed the paac,ice o.
law, and has, ever since, preferred laying his op
ponents on their back, IN n lega, way, to being
laid on his own in so ludicrous manner as the a
boye related