The Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1837-1867, 1844-07-08
COUSIN SALLY billiard.
ny HAMILTON C. JONES.


fortune (good or bad will say to exercise my
self in legal disquisitions, it has before be:a
me to be obliged to prosecute 20 drefuI, marked
aud malicious assault-a more wilul violent, dan
gerous battery, and finally more daboicul breach
Of the peace has seldom been your duty to pass
upon, one so shocking TO benevolent feelings, as
this which took place at Captain Rico's in this
county. But you will hear from The Witnesses"
The Witnesses being sworn two or three wero ex
amined, and deposed-one said that he had heard the
noise and did not the fght-nnoher that he
the row, but didn't know who struck frst-nnd
third, that he was very drunk and couldn't say much
abou, the skrmmage.
LaWyer Chops.--I am very Sorry gentlenHn, to
have occupied your time with the stupidity Of the
witnesses examined, II arises, gentlemen, altogether
from misaPprehcnsion on my part. Had known, as
now do that had witness in attendance, who
was well acquainted with all the circumstances OF 4
case, and who was able to make himself clearly un.
ders,ood by the court and jury, should not long
have respassed your time and patience Come
forward, Mr. Harris, and be
So forward came the witness, fat, chuify looking
mama "eetle'' corned and took his corporal oath
with an air.
Chops.-liarris, we wish you 10 tell about the riot
that happened the other day at Capt. Rce's, and a
good deal Of time has been already wasted in circum-
locuton, we wish you TO be compcndous, and at the
time explicit, as possible.
Harris. -"Edzactly' '-gving the lawyer a know
ing wink, and ut the same time clearing his throat
Captain Rice, he gin treat, and cousin Sally Dill
iard she came 10 our house and axed me il my
wife she mount 60 | tod cousin Sally billiard
that my wife was poorly, being how she had
touch OF the rheumatics in the hip and the big swamp
in the road, and the big swamp wa, up FOR there
had been heap of rain lately, bat howsomever, as
it was sh G, cousin Sally billiard, my wife she rnout
go. Well, cousin Sally billiard then asked me il
Nose he MOUNT go. l told cousin Sally ID illiard
that Nose he was the foreman OF the crop, and the
crop was smarty in the grass; but howsomever, as
she, cousin Sally billiard, Nose he mou; go
Chops-In the name of common sense, Mr. Harris,
what do you mean 10y this rgmarole ? Do say wha'
you know ubou, the riot
TVitacss Captain Rice he gin a treat, and cousin
Sally billiard she come to our house and axed
fmy wife she moutn't go. tod cousin Sally Dill
lard
ChoPs,-StoP, sir il you please, we don't want to
hear any thing about cousin Sally billiard and your
Witaess,-Well, WILL sir, if you will let me.
ChoPS-We sir, go on.
WHness.-Well. Captain Rice he gin treat, and
cousin Sally billiard she to house and
aXed me if my wife she mount GO
Chops There it is again; witness, witness, please
TO stop.
Witness. We'll, sir, what do you want
Chops We want 10 know about the fight land you
must not proceed in this impairment story. DO
you know any thing about the matter before the
Court?
WhnesSTo be sure I do
Chops. We'll, you go on and tell il; and nothing
else.
Wiaess.-Wel, Captain Rice ho gin treat
Chops.-Tbis is iutoerable May it plea the
courtI move that this witness be comed for a con-
tempt; he seems to be trihing with this court.
COurt.-Witness, you now before n Court of
Justice, and unless you behave yourself in
becoming manner, you will be sent TO jail; begin
and tell what you know about the fight at Captain
Rice's.
Titness.-( Charmed )--WcII, gentlemen, Captain
Rice he gin treat and cousin Sally billiard
Chops hope this witness may be ordered into
custody.
Court CATER celebrating MIR Attorney, the
Court is Of opinion that may time by telling
the witness to go on, in his way. Proceed, AIR
Harris, with your story but stick to the point.
Witness--Yes, gent lemen: well Captain Rice he
gin treat, and cousin Sally billiard she over
to our house and axed me if my wife she MOUNT go.
told cousin Sally billiard that my wife she was
poorly being how she had the rheumatics in the
hip, and the big s:-amp up; but howsomever, as
it she, cousin Sally billiard, my wife she mout
go. Well, cousin Sally billiard then asked me if
Nose he mount go. I told cousin Sally billiard as
how Nose, he was the fore OF the crop, and the
crop was smartly in the gras, but howsomever, as it
she, cousin Sally billiard, Nose he n'out co.
So they goes together Nose, my wife and cousin
Sally billiard, and they came to the big swamp, and
it up,as telling you ;but being as how there
was log the big swamp, cousin Sally billiard
and Nose, like gentle folks they walked the log, but
my wife like a drafted fool, waded through-and |
that is all Iknoc about the fight.
Correspondence Of The Proride4ce Journal
NEWPORT, June 27, 1914.
The General Assembly transacted but very iltleibu
sness yesterday. Mr. Ballou of the Senate, called
the attention of the Senate the petition Of Sullivan
Dorr, presented this morning. He said he had been
requested by r. w. Dorr, to dscaIm all Knowledge