Jeffersonian Republican. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1840-1853, 1844-11-07

and, before lie had quite whiIIled bis slick
away. he became absorbed in The inception of
grand thought. II seems, sitting down TO-
guess, his aslu,e brain made plunge, al once.
among The metaphysical and scientific ramif-
cations of guessing; and, not long after, he
might have been observed, with sober sort OF
Twinkle in his eye, marching off along the
!" Levee," apparently looking for house 10 let,
hummlng-
Yankee Doodle come along!
When fortune falls Distressing.
There's norhng like Yankee song,
And scientific guessing.
Early next day, our hero and another odd
looking genius were seen on ladder naIlng
up broad strip of canvass all across the front
of house on The Levee; and lhe job being
completed, there was displayed, in haring,
spraw ling, struggling, broken-hscked decapa
ted, knock k-need, round shouldered, bow-legged,
limping letters, Roman, German, Hebrew, cal
igraphic. chlros graphic, Arabian, Armenian, and
Pothook-ian:
NJ ORLEENS GESSING lNSTlTOOT.
GEss1NG TAUT In ONE LESSEN.
Only 30 Fiue cents.
The thing produced a sensation. at once.
among sailors, pedlers, Leyee laborers, and all
SORTS of sragglers. Or Professor borrowed
an old rotten awning hung i. up, and divided
his room in two, put his assistant al the door 10
take in quarters, turned Tin cup inside down
on The middle Of an old rlckeiy table, got vial
of vinegar. pot of tar, bollle of whIskev, and
various other welI-known odorlerous affairs ar
ranged around him; and. with black skull
cap on his head, and red stick in his hand,
he made no bad "splurge" at the represesenla-
ton of modern Faust. Madame Ludwig
might have taken lesson from him, f. you
un'stand me now7' and Herr Alexander should
have seen him. He drew mystic ring on The
ceiling, with charcoal filling IL up with most
indescribable curecues," rlgh, over the table,
and business soon commenced.
In straggcd an open-mouthed enquirer alter
the mysteries Of guessing.
"Siranger, good morning; walk up and pro-
scribe Yourself as true enquirer alter The IT.
revelations of Gesseology. Put your leil hand
upon the converted Tin cup. Very well. Liit
vour right hand to the ceiling, and fix your
ewes upon The magic circle. So. Now. if you
wink or remove your eve, you'll ruin the hull
business, stranger; SO, jest hold sllli Now
percede TO pervoke the guessing spsrlt to de-
scend upon'you. Wha. is this hold under
your nose %,
"Vinesar."
"Criminl jngo! you larn fast! what's this :"
"Thal's tar"
fright again, my pupil what's this I"
Birthstone.
"Good you envelope the faculty rsaly anna
zing. Can you guess what this is :"
"Whskey, by thunder" y"
"All creation! how quick you take IL! are
you sure It's whiskey?"
"Sure well, reckon"
"You'd better taste it and see. Is 1t whis-
key?"
"WeIl, it is"
"Take good swig, them you'll do stranger;
you're ready 10 graduate. Come IN, next. Hal
10 mister, don't take that bottle away.
One after another, as fast as he could DIS
pose of them, the Professor found his custom
ers sideling half shyy in upon him all day long,
and when. now and then, one would exhibit
belliserent spirit, between good humor and
whiskey. the New England Magician still man
AGED to send him of satisfied. Every body
coming out was questioned by The eager crowd
in waiting. as 10 "whal sort of a show II was,
any how :" and the answer was pretty general
ly the same" FRS, rate. and no mistake, and
The las, experiment is worth half the money"
The Professor counted his receipts that
night, finding round sum 10 help him on
West: sold his "insiioo" for premium to his
enlerprising assistant and the next morning ne
was off, juggling the silver in his pocket and
blessing de,ouily The benefits OF science