The New York herald., 1844-12-08

The LoArER LIrRRATI OF New YoRk-Among
the fungi that grow around the roots of meropo-
Titan society, like barnaces to ships bottom, the
Locfr LitUati are class too numerous, too pesti-
lent, and too annoying, to be neglected by natural
philosophers. Since, however, the "Farmer's
Club have held several interesting discussions,
recently, upon small potatoes, without alluding,
even incidentally, to the subject, and Professor
Mapes himself, seems to have overlooked it in all
his profound researches into the caves and dens
Windust's, we have concluded to take the matter
in hand ourselves We have engaged dozen ex-
ira biographers, (he authors Of the life Of Henry
Clay and the biography Of James X. Polk not Of
the number,) to do up the history and adventures
OF several OF our most prominent literary loafers,
which will be published in due time, embellished
with portraits so accurate that their disconsolate
landlords and tailors will weep at the sight. Mean.
while, we will give some general idea Of this spe
cies Of animal without specie. this genus without
genius.
Your genuine literary loafer of the first class Is
connoisseur in coats,and critic in the matter OF
trowsers He is dainty, too, in the tie Of his era
vat, and studies the immutable laws OF harmony
in the coors Of his vest and gloves. He seldom
paironixes" the same establishment for long time
together, being, although, an "aristocrat" of the
deepest dye and an unliring toady OF the "up-town
ten thousand" most strictly democratic in dispen-
sing his valuable custom among tradesmen and the
other "vulgar" callings
The literary loafer is also ar epicure in wines,
venison, turtle and the other creature comforts OF
pointing him out to strangers as "ihe celebrated
Mr.. -" and c0nde :cends TO be polite and So
ciable to gentlemen from the South, who take
champagne after dinner, or invite him to a bottle
Of Heidsick, he meets them on the landing. He
knows the flavor Of all the various brands of Sc
gars, and pufis his volume of smoke in the face Of
the public, as coolly as he would (if he could find
green enough publisher,) hlsvolume Of stale SEN
all occasions az "a manuscript he is completing;
and which, he iatters himself, will not be entirely
unworthy Of his humble reputation"
The literary loaier, too, changes his hotel nearly
as often as he does his taior-and for precisely
the same reason; and, wha, must appear TO the un
initiated very remarkable, no does 80 always with
the full consent Of the parties interested. In fact,
we have heard OF this "change" being effected
with the assistance Of the right halt Of pair oi
boots taken suddenly away from certain part OF
our lOaier's nexpressbes.
Our loafer is extravagantly fond of the opera
and manages TO squeeze himself in every night on
the strength OF being attached" TO the office oil
some newspaper, whose Proprietors probably have
discharged him or refused 10 employ him on &C.
count OF aziness mbecilliy, and want OF character
He has all the choice bits OF Belisario and Lucre
za Borgia at his tongues end, and whistles them
diviney to the accompaniment OF the "deviI's tat
too," drummed on the crown oi his lhisi) Partisan
m0leskln. He has passion for very large white
opera glasses, and makes Il point 10 stare out o
countenance every modest woman within the se
micircle Of his observation He always eats hot
suppers after the play Is overif he - invited HIS
acquaintance among the oystercellsrs is extensive
and yet minute; and when so unfortunate as TO be
obliged to depend upon his own resources Tor Q
supply Of the shelly danties, he selects by instinct
the ceverest waiter, and pays the bill with mag
niiicent nod TO the handsomest OF the barkeepers,
at the same time graciously giving ham hls hsFg "a
shake-from which, however, tnothing u ever
shaken.
The literary loafer is perfect devoiec al the
shrine of woman. He writes songs 10 eyes oil al
coors, and apostrophises ringeis thai dety the en-
bro wing influences Of the Italian Hair Dye liz
is set to music by "the celebrated composer, Mr
-" and writes pufIs Of his own songs (no
they are not his, for he has carefully stolen ihem)
which he begs published, by being "sweet" On
some supernumerary police reporter for the daily
press He thinks Sue fellow OF very good ina
gination, but somewhat licenious, and his style
sadly needs polish. Bulwer has written some fair
ish novels, but Carlyle, Emerson and the horne
transccndentalists are set OF the protoundes
ounces. He has an idea or two which the world
may one day hear of
Our loater always has ga work ia the press,
which has cost him incalculable labor, and must
he thinks, create sensation when II appears. I'm
fortunately, however, publishers are the most an
punctual men alive, and this "work" never doei
"come from the binders''--or, il it does, nobody
ever hears OF 1t.
Such is hasty and imperfect outline Of singl,
variety Of the loafer literatl who nfest society
sponging a sumptuous living, and even sort d
equivocal notorety, which, with thousands, passe
for fame, out OF the gullibility and good nature
mankind. With scarcely fools modicum of wi
or talent, totally destitute of energy, morals o.
honesty lazy, impudent, and incapable Of shame
he lounges and swaggers through life, pest and
nuisance to all unfortunate enough TO come II
contact with him. Sometimes he writes TRASHY
ove.stories for the slip-slop magazines, and is i'm
mortalized in double plea on the fourth page OF
primrose. colored cover. He prefers, however
utter idleness to any other species OF employment
and only deigns to exercise the few faculties will
which niggard nature has endowed him, when !
becomes absolutely necessary for him to seek new
victims to supply his manifold wants:
What think you, reader, of this bret preface I,
| our forthcoming "Lives Of the Loafersp' Will
not the details furnish amusement and instruction
both erich" and rare? We shall see.
FIRE IN FALL RvER--We understand that
/ fire was discovered on Thursday morning about
o'clock In the spinning room OF the Massasoh Mills
which the time threatened the entire destructoa
the very large work o this corporation, but by tia
prompt and well directed exeons OF the fire department
Il confined to the where II at first discover
ed The damage amounts TO about $4,000, and was in
sured.- Boston Journal. \"