New-York daily tribune., 1844-11-06
PUNCH,S LETTER.WRrTER.
From Iptdopcr 10 Widoto, riM an offer of .Narria
Fronn tho Che rivor


From the Charivari.
My DEAR MADAM.-Your kind looks and cor
dial words have accompanied me all the way
home, and-the truth is, write this before going
TO bed-I shall sleep the more soundly for having
the matter off my mind. 1t is true we have met
but once; but we are both of us at that rational
point of life, when people know the most value
OF time; and as all ceremony is but an idle waste
of existence, | beg herewith to offer you my
hand, and with it, though | have been married
before, an entire heart. There are hearts, ma
dam, allow me to say, all the better for keeping;
they become mellower, and more worth wo-
mans acceptance than the crude, unripe things,
too frequently gathered-as children gather green
fruit-to the discomfort of those who obtain them.
have been married to one wife, and know
enough of the happiness OF wedlock TO wish it to
be continued in another. The best compliment
can pay u the dear creature now in heaven, is
to geek another dear creature here on earth. She
was woman Of admirable judgment; and her
portrait-it hangs over my chimney. .piece--smi!es
down upon me Us write. She seems to know
my thoughts, and to approve of them. | said,
madam, she was woman Of excellent ludg-
ment.
My means are tolerably good; more than sufi-
cient for my widowed state. OF the truth Of
proof have also heard-casually hcard-that
fortune has not, my dear madam, been blind to
your deserts, and has awarded you more than
enough to keep the wolf from the door. rejoice
al this, for whatever might be my disappointment,
would not entail upon you the inconvenience of
marriage unaccompanied by an agreeable CON-
petcnco What is enough for onc-it has been
said-is enough for two. But this is the igno-
rance of Cupid, who never could learn figures.
Now Hymen--as you must know, dear madam
is better arjthmGtician; taught as ho is by
butcher and baker. Love in cottage is pretty
enough for girls and boys but men and women
like a larger mansion, with coach house and sta
bigg.
You may urge against me that l have incum-
brances. By no means. My daughter having
married beggar, has ceased to have any natural
claim upon me. If am civil to her, it is solely
from certain weakness of heart that l cannot
wholly conquer; ard something 500, moreover,
to keep up appearances with meddllDg world.
have told her that she is never to expect far
thing from me, and should despise myself not
to be man of my word.
have, too, a son, bnt when tell you that
have once paid his debts, incurred in his wild mi
nority, you will allow that, except my blessing,
and, at times, my paternal advice, he can expect
nothing more. know the duties of :. father, ,and
will never satisfy the cravings of profliga,e.
Nevertheless, he IS my own son and whatever
may be his need, my blessing and my counsel ne
shall never want.
NV health, madam, has ever been excellent.
have worn like rock. have heard of such things
as nerves, but believer i! my fate to have been born
without any such weaknesses. l speak thus
plainly of essentials, as you and ], madam are
now too wise to think consumption pretty
to tie ourselves to ill.health, believing it vastly
interesting. L can ride forty miles day, and
take the hedge with any fellow of five and-twen.
ty. say speak of these things that you may
know me as am Moreover assure youI eat
with my own teeth, and grow my own hair. Be-
sides this, am only two.andfifty.
What do you say, madam? AS for vices, as
am an honest man, do not think can lay any
to my charge. may have my human weak
nesses-such, indeed, as have touched upon
above; but, madam, it has ever been my study
through life to be respectable. have the hand
soonest pew in the church, and don't owe any
man a shilling.
Well, my dear madam, it is getting late, and
must conclude. / hate to be out of bed after
eleventh is now past twelve. Hence, you must
perceive how very much am interested in this
business. In another ten minutes l shall be
asleep, and dreaming of you. May wake to
find my dream-for know what it will be-a
reality!
If our solicitors ara mutually satisfied, will
you name the day? / am superstitious about
days-say, then, say Thursday week and be-
ieve me Jour devoted lover, till death,
NICHOLAS BLAcKTHoRN.
PS. May see you Tomorrow