New-York daily tribune. [volume] (New-York [N.Y.]) 1842-1866, 1844-08-20
SPIRIT OF PUNCH

PuRch'S O6itudry.-Dicd, on the 24lh July,
after many Parliamentary attacks, the Franchise
OF Sudbury. Owing to internal CORRUPTION, The
Franchise was obliged 10 undergo the amputatlon
of Two Of lis members, which, modification nav
ING ensued hastelIed its ceath The pockets OF
l40 voters have bee,. lett 10 d'plDre The lfisS oi
Lie Franchise. The deceased IN Its lte-tlme
was not much respected, though It's death VIII
certainly leave large VOID lit the annaIs Ut 5TI
berry and currUptlun which wlIlrcqure the united
ability Of Parliament properly to hi up.
Removing the Rubbish 1T is the intention Of
government, b. sUun as Parliament is pro'ogu,d
IL introduce the sweeping machine into The
House of Commons IL clear away those inca-
s,Ires that have been dropt during The session. Ii
this be true, Hcrcues's labor Of cleansing the
Augedn stables Will be mere child's play ~ 1t.
Meteorological Intelhgcace.-Du5inga recent
thunder s,n,,n ~ ..h-.rvrd by the p-ssope.rs
of Wlmbu>h's omnibus that the lightning Was
scarcely visible III consequence OF The concucto'
having stepped INSIDE; and at a dinner party on
the same day, three OF the guests were LAID pros
tra,c bv sort of fud-not the electric fluid
with which they had very highly charged their
glasses.
Poor Blown.up Generals With the prophetic
spirit which IS the sole property of Punch, he
herewith supplies his million OF readers with the
long hoped.ior Iesult-very graphically put-oi
the invention Of Captain Warner. Without wait
ing for the opinion of Lord Btougham upon the
matter, Punch confidently predicts, on the sue
cess of the invisible SHE'LL terrible decline in the
worlds market of all gunpowder heroes. The
great god, Mars himself, will have nothing lett
HIM but Basng- hastreet; he must give up
wholesale carnage, and for an honest livelihood
if Inc have still weak hankering after combustl-
bles-sell lucfer matches. As for Bclons, it Will
be we'll with her, if now and then she can get
doy's charing, Punch has had dream, which
was not all dream The destructive power
of the Warner she'll duly acknowledged, he
thought that all the cannon from Depiford-a!l
the shot-a swords and bayonets; IN a word, all
the metal cast and hammered by Vulcan for the
sport Of war, were put up Tor auction-mere
waste iron, to be turned into railways and steam
engines. Punch in his dream saw very taking
advertisement, drawn out IN his most unctrous
ST, by George Robins, who had received
ders from the Horse Guards to sell Punch
knows not The number-of helmets, which
George, in his prettlest manner, recommended to
country wives and farmers as exqulsitely adapt
ed for bec.hives.' Hurrah, then, tor the Warner
shell, from whitehall terrible as it is-peace may
be Matched, to the true happiness OF man and TIE
best glory of nations
Literary Iatelligence-The next edition of
the Lac. of Nelson will, we understand, be
done up in the plainest boards, out of compliment
TO the present condition of his statue.
Theatrical Intcligeace.-Thc Busy Body is
now performed with great success at two houses.
Critics are at loss to decide whose Mdrpiot is
the finer bit of acting-Lord Broughaln's or
Charles Matthews's-but, after the astonishing
way in which Lord Brougham has acted all
through the imprisonment for debt bill, the supc-
rioly hiss been awarded, most justly, we think,
TO ms lordship.
Knop all Men by these Presents, S'c-The
Russian frigate Aurora has Just arrived with some
valuable presents for her Majesty, and quantity
of gold which, it is rumored, " has been sent 10
this country for the purpose Of being refined" II
his gold comes from the mines of Siberia, the
only method by which 1t can possibly &c refined,
is to give ii the poor Poles
U5@" want TO be shaved" said man the
other day 10 barber in Ffsnkfort-slleet, blu,
have not time"
"On. that makes no difference" said the bar.
| Der.
Nor Vel, if that IS the case, shave me
He was shaved, and the tonsor asked for The
| pay.
- told veu," said the customer, I" that had
no time Time is money. can't pay you"
So 10th were shaved amer. republican.
Ug An unsuccess,,, attempt vas mace lately