, 1844-08-24
Trick of a LOafer.


Achiering a drink.-You can hard
ly turn over a page of the "Ollapodi-
ana' of the late lamented Willis G..
Clark without finding something to in,
terest and amuse-frequentIy a stery
which will make you laugh outright.
Read the following sketch, which was
written while the author was on IA
visit to Niagara falls. The scene ap-
pears to be laid during a heavy show
er, and just as a stage was ready to
leave:-
'.EXceedingly amused was ! at the
air and manner of a decided 'loater,'
sentimen.alist wItha!, and a topper,
who had come out of his way from
Buffalo To see the falls. 'LandIord,'
said he 10 the Boniiacc OF the cata-
ract. 'and you, gentlemen. WHO stand
on this porch. Witnessing this pitiIess
rain. you sec beInre you one who has
Il tempest of Sorrows a-hpatin' upon
his head continually. Wdnst was
wu'th twenty thousand dollars, and
! driv the saddiing profession. Cir
cumstanceS alter cases; now ] wish
for to solicit charity. Some of YOU
seems benevolent, and | do believe
am not destined to rank myself among
these who could travel from Dan 10
ReerSheba. and say all is barren.-
No. | scorn to brag; but | am %intelii-
gent beyond my years, and my edu-
cation has been complete. ! have
read Wolncy's RUNS, MarshalIs Lie
oil Washington, and pope's Essay on
Nan, and most of the literature Of the
day. as contained in the small news
papers. But the way I'm situated
at present is sc~andaIous. The fact
is my heart is broke, and I'm Just l>h.
maciIzin. about the globe, with Il SOM
hrc brow and 4 bosom laden with We.
Who viii help mc?-sreah siugiv
genuemen--whn will 'ease my cricls
and drive my cares awayY' rs Isaac
Watts says in one .! his devotional
poems.'
No anSwe was returned. \ gen
eral laugh arose. Tie pride Of the
m~endicant was eNciied-rage got the
better OF his humility, and, shaking
his fist in the face of the bystanders,
he roared out
you're ali L pack ofpoor. or'nary
common people. You insult honest
poverty; but do not hang my head
for a that as Burns says. | will
chastise any man here, Cor two three
cen drinks of Nonog0hah whiSkey;
yes. though | have but lately escaped
shipwreck, coming rom Michigan 10
Buffalo, and am weak from the loss
of suength-yetl will whip the best
of you. Let any on ye come over
to the Black Rock Railroad Dee-potr,
and I'll lick him like ad-n"
"Never mind that" said one-"tell
us about the shipwrcck."
"Ah!" he continued, "that wdS u
scene! Twenty miles out at sea, on
the lake; the storm Dustin upon the
deck; the waves, like mad t~ailors, ma,
king breaches of it continually; the
IighNings a Dustin overhead, and
kissing in the water; the clouds meet,
ing the earth; the land just over the
lee-bow; every mast IN spIInters; ev-
cry sail in rags; women 4 screechln';
farmers wives cmigratIn' TO the west
calling for their husbands; and he'll
yawnin' all around! A good many
was dreadfulIy sea-sick and one man
after casting forth every thing beside,
with i violent reich threw up his
boots. Oh, gentlemen, ii was awful
At length came the last and deStruc'
tive bIlIOw. 1t struck the ship or
the lett side, in the neighborhood o
the poop, and all at wanst felt some
thing under us breakin' away. The
vessel was parting! One half the
crew was drowned; passengers was
praying, and commenting themselves
TO heaven. | alone escaped the wa
terry DOOM"
"And how did you manage 10 re
deem yourself from destruction?'
was the general inquiry.
"Why, gentlemen, the fact is,
seen how things was Il goin' and
took my hat and meat ashore!"
The last | saw Of this Munchauscr
was as our coach wheeled away
He had achieved a drink and wa;
perambulatIng through the mud, light
ened, momentarlIy, Of his sorrows."
am ,rrs,rFf ,rg.,oy: a. A.. f-.yI ~