The Woodstock age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1844-1845, 1844-07-25

! IIo4N L ~ L vi liz oi''sih ~
KAH FOKAIS OF WOODSTOCK
QUICK AND SPEEDY DESTRUC'
TION OF THE WHOLE PARTY
BY THE RULERS OF THE LAND
-LOKAHS SUBMIT AND HUM
BLY, SUE FOR PARDON!
The great and renowned city Of Wood
stock that lies, baskng in the sun by the
river Qucchee, between the heNen-kiss
inc hills Mount Tom, and Mt. Peg, has
been the scene of terrible connections and
distractions within the last week. Two
horrid deeds have been did, unparalleled
in the history Of crime and deeds of dark
ness, which we are happy to state however
have been ferreted out and speedy Justice
dealt down upon the heads of the daring
offenders,
We proceed to parlicularizc. On the
18th of July, in the year of our Lord one
thousand eight hundred and for,y-rour, and
of the independence of the United States
of America the sly,y-eighth, some forty or
fifty lokah lokahs, living within the pre-
cints of the aforesaid city of Woodstock
and the towns lying round about the same,
did get up, attend and partake of an affair
which they designated "Democralic
Supper" at the inn of one Samuel Whit
ney; on which occasion, it is stated and
generally believed, that the lokah fokahs
aforesaid, did actually presume to break
bread and eat meat and do other things in
imitation Of the manners and customs of
the better classes of high.born, wcll-bred
and civilized ANIMALS of the tribe Of Sir
Harry Coon and his Royal blooded family;
TO the great scandal of public morals. and
to the great peril of the distinctions which
it is the duty of every good citizen to pre-
serve in society, which if allowed to be
set at naught in this way, would inevitably
lead to the sure destruction of all the bar
riers which are intended to keep the low,
and base-born, vulgar mechanics, stagemen,
and lokah lokaAs and other cattle from in
truding themselves upon the rights and
privileges of the better classes, and basely
attempting to initiate their tastes and hab-
its of life.
Further, on the 18th day Of July, in the
year aforesaid, one Chas c. Eastman, Il
lokah fokah, did, wonderful as it may SEEM
actually, in broad day light, and by public
noice,procced in carriage tothe adjoining
town of Bridgewaer and then and there
deliver speech in public place and be-
fore all who chose to listen to him! The
Of this act may be better under
stood when il is stated that this same pre-
fellow of an Eastman is most in.
conlcs'bly and according to his own con-
LESSONS made in divers places on sundry
occasions, actually ,of the lower orders of
society; claiming no relationship either by
blood or association with the upper class
IS, having been begotten by Methods,
Circuit Preacher, aud born of the daugh-
or Of a common country merchant in the
insignificant town of Fryeburg, sometimes
Jailed Pcquacket, on the Saco river, away
Town East in the dmlnuiivc, and poverty
stricken state of Maine! Good heavens
vas such hardihood ever heard of before!
What is the world coming to- The coon
church burnngs in philadelphia-lhe muir
Ter Of Joe Smith, sink into hopeless. in
ignlicancc beside this most reasonable,
md unheard or outrage upon the authority
md good breeding Of the Royal bloodcd
Of Woodstock
But thank Heaven there was one left
' Nv lOllONCu lHC NtlCStuDlc COIllcIlllcT OF
he authority OF the emblem beast of the
higher classes, and upon the spot protested
gainst it, and has publicly exposed the
mpudent rascal. How fortunate that such
phlanlhropic individual happened 10 be
oundl And how should the community
congratulate itself upon the possession of
UGH mighty defender!
One Thomas T.. Powers known as the
most pcaccablc, quiet, orderly, generally
and universally beloved person.
Ige in all the country, fearing that the ass
nd-ency of the Woodstock Horsc-J Jockey
unto was in danger, gathered himself to-
,ether in the Office of the infdel editor Of
Liberal Extracts" to devise ways and
means TO put down the ylllanous loco(ocos
vhohad dared to "move, live and have a
icing" without the appreciation of their
letters, and to deal out "death and dam
ation" with mcrcless hand upon the
utility heads ofihe daring offenders agans,
Don law and coon authority.