Baton-Rouge gazette. [volume] (Baton-Rouge, La.) 1819-1856, 1843-03-18
NO.. g..

HE MYSTERIES OF sAUsAGE-MAKING.-A
late number Of the London Sunday Times
contains a humorous police sketch, detailing
'hc mysteries of sausage-making in that city.
Il will be found extremely rich on perusal:--
Jenny Hoskins, n gentlemen wearing a
red flannel cap, a remarkably greasy flannel
Jacket. and immensely thick overhaul stock
ings. appeared to sustain a claim for G1 1ss.
Cd. against Thomas Tubbs, a Wholesale dealer
in beef and pork sausagep, black buildings,
s~aVelors and young Germans. II is impossi-
BILE 70 aay which was the dirfier, the plaintiff
or d~fsniant. The whole Of The auditory
very READILY and politely made way for the
savurv vendors.
Commis.ioner.-" What's this claim for !"
.I.rry Uoshins.-" For maxim o. sassin-
gers, s. r."
Derndamt.-" You mean for spilen on EN-,
Jenny"
.Iemmy Hoskins.-(Knowingly)- J." I'll
spile Won afore your done" ~(L.aughter)
Commissioners" Do you mean 10 say this
is for wages 7"
Jemmu Hoskins-" Yes, sir, for one week,
in vich | made a matter o three ton O. sas-
singers and young Germins." 0taughter)
Commissioners" Three tons of sausages
and Young germans? Why, what do you
meant Explain yourself. How do you make
them =
JENNY Hoshins.-" Does your honor mean
what onl-what did we make EN- on Cos
if was TO tell you that, why, perhaps--'
(Langhter)
Comrsissioner-"Srr Sir, vou ase bound to an
swer any question | ask. From what did
Won manufacture so many sausages and young
Germans as you call them? OF beef"
"Beefa" said Jemmy Hoskins, re1ectively,
" heef4 yes-why, there sartainly were some
beef that week and, let me see, we had two
green ans, and no less than three luckies :"
Commissioner,-"And pray, sir, what is q
green IN
JENNY Hoslins-" w, a unfortunate pig,
to be sure a pig as don't die a MATERIAL win
lent death-as goes off without being stick'd."
CommisSioner,-"T Then how does it die 7"
Jenny Uoshins-Oh, various ways. Some
times a pig ee's the measles, and sometimes
they gets smothered and die that way
Great symptoms of nausea in court.)
Commissioners" Blu, surely you don't use
such unwholesome stuff for food !"
Jenny Hoshins.-No, sir, we chops 'em
up for sassingers-Goars of laughter)-and
wot's VERY bad indeed, we makes 'em up
into saverlors and Germans. We seasusss up
all on EN- well, and dries 'sm up over burn
Ing sordust /"
Commissioners" Upon my word, you are
a clever fellow. Pray what do you mean by
lucky tell he court what lucky no."
Jenny Hoskins-"A lucky. sir, is a s~s
as meets with a haccident in the street-sich
as breaking a leg, getting a shaft run inter
him, and slehe likes. 0Laughtrr.) We're
sure to buy him cheap, cos he must be sold.
Meats beautiful, s;r-you wouldn't knew it
from OK or beef. Why, we picks out the prime
parts for the cheap soup-houses and penny
pie shops (Roars Of laughter.)
Commissioners" Well, Mr.. Thos. Tubbs,
and what do you say to all this Z"
Say, sir" said Mr.. Tubbs, " | say AZ how
this ere mans a lying warmit. The very
last day as he left me he spilled about three
hundred weight of stuff"
Commissioner" Stufr!-what stuff"
Mr.. 1ubbs.-" Why, the sassage meat to
be sure. Instead of running the proper Ticker
inter the skins he run'd in cold water. end,
in course, the sassingers hadn't got no taste
nor flavor in 'em at alI.'' naughter)
Commissioners You hear this. Mr.. Jem-
my Hoskins?'
Year him." said Jenny, Indignantly, in
course years him. The mornin' az he speaks
on / was going TO I'll the skins, and he comes
up to me, and taking a handful of .assage
meat, he smells to it, and then a shakin his
head, he ses, Jenny Sos he, 8 this years
rayther too strong you'd better give il = rince
over with the Ticker in the bilers.' Why,
that's for making ketchup,' SEES / : and that's
my perquisites.'
Commissioner" What, make catsup from
water that horse-fesh has been boiled in :"
Jenny HoshaRs.-" Yes, sir; the best mush-
rom catsup in the world"
A fat, sleek-headed juryman here turned
very siekiy. Mr.. Jenny Hoskins continues
-" Fact is, sir, nobody don't know what he
yeats in London. | wants my money. that's
all, and if go he don't fork for him,
that's all. | amt said nothing about black
buildings vet, nor young Germans, nor
Commissioner.-" For heavens sake say
no more, Will you pay this man his claim!''
After some alterations, Jenny Hoskins
agreed to take 81 los. in liquidation of all de-
m1Hds.
Immediately the case was over, our re-
porter WAS teIegrapbed by Mr.. Thomas Tubbs,
and an overture made, for the purpose of keep
ing the case out Of the papers. The reporter
referred the worthy sausage maker to his
editor.
The Scotchman boasts of gobbets raw,
OF haggis paunch and cockle-leekie ;
But sausage meats may bear the bell,
From any filth in guide Aud Reekie.
As Samuel Weller said to Maude-
Don't buy your whites ready chor'd.''