The daily Madisonian. [volume] (Washington City [i.e. Washington, D.C.]) 1841-1845, 1843-09-21
rnE rnREE GERMAN DocroRs.

ced al the beginning. For several long years he had
praciiced as bsrber then attended lectures on ana
Tony bought German translation OF r.ien s''u'
al length obtained the degree Of ~ ID. from the oe-
ebrated University of Prague. Instead Of the doe
torai hat, our Nj. ID. wore green cap with broad
peak. He did 50, as he said, 10 protect his eyes.
Censorious folks said, however, that lac had mol
hat, nor what wasworse, money 10 buy one. IL Is
probable The doctors purse was at low water. lie
could breathe a vein as well as his colleagues but
verifying the old proyerb ha had but little honor ,n
his own country. HIS practice stood at zero his
townsmen looked on hun with contempt lie did
his best to mend matters, He inserted advertise
ments 10 the newspapers, beginning as usual, by
Gods help owe my recovery from long PAIN aud
suffering TO the skill and attention OF Doctor N N.
The blessing Of God be on him. Still, no one took
the bait. At night, when he observed house where
there party he rang the bell SO violently that
the people, supposing hall the town was on FIRE,
rushed TO the windows. The door opened he
claimed, "Am rghti Is Doctor N. wanted here ~
The porter surlily answers, "Noj It is a mistake.
We are all here IN good health" Unluckily, once,
misied by the darkness of the night, he went twice
to the same house. The result was the infection
OF good ihrashing, Ia Langan, aud the being OBJ
iiged TO keep his bed for month.
his woful time. The suffering doctor
cursed not only his own townsmen, but half Of man
kind. He occupied, however, in curing lis
bruises, and thus gained experience, One day a
newspaper fell into his hands. Among other re-
markaDle events, such the retreat of the Engls h
from CiDoOl, anu new discovery IN cookery, was
the announcement of Wanted, in large provincial
town, a skili,u ply siean. Horotofore the only
practitioner in the place has been very elderly
nurse, The increasing population and the probable
rise OF provision render The acquisition of physi-
clan Indispensable. lie ought to have good know.
ledge Of surgery. The citizens being of rather a
warm temperament, have sometimes disputes, which
will furnish him with too many opportunities for the
replacement Of broken bones, and the NEEDING of
broken heads. Apply, for further information, to A.
H., doctor IA NJ road suby fp
both body and mind refreshed Vgor and hope we're
at once resuscitated. He sprang out of bed where
he had passed long and weary month upset the ta-
Bile on which lay his horn snuff box and strewed the
contents on the floor. He managed, however, to
get pinch, and exclaimed, THAI is the place for
Inc in
Great men alike rapid in resolve AMI action
BY evening he had acquired the necessary infurma-
ton as to hs route, and the third day he
ted IN covered vehicle, jogging to Schoppenstedt,
his place OF destination. The doctor had remember
ed the proverb, IS the coat makes tie man"-hence
his appearance object of great solicithe ere
he presented himself to the good citizens OF Schop-
penstedt. He bought from an old cloathes nan a
coat OF blue velvet, with silver lace puce coored
waistcoat, and grey small clothes TO these was ad
ded awell powdered perwig, with suitable tail His
being received with respect and attention thus IN
sured; and though at every inn the landlord would
not fail to charge him double price, still his vanity
was battered, and he was thus compensated for O. G
damage OF bls finances.
On fine May morning, the country clothed 10 its
richest verdure the doctor beheld at length the lee
pie of Schoppensted His heart throbbed he felt
that the crisis OF his fate was at hand However, II
was not quite so near as he supposed. The heavy
road and aded horses determined the driver 10 halt
at noon, that he might thus enter the town in the
evening in good style. An inn only few mies dis
tant was selected. The doctor lighted and demand
ed a private room he wished to be alone. " No. PC
is vacant" said the landlord bowling respectfully
+" the door is open" The doc or thanked him, and
went up stairs. Misled by a reverie, he walked into
No % vice 20. The noise he made caused man 10
rise slowly from the corner of a sofa on which he
was sitting. The doctor, not aware of his error ex-
claimed peeyishly, d" Who youi What business
have you in my apartmentin The Intercepted rose
up and displayed TO the querst person habited in
blue coat, studded with bronze buttons shoulder
of-mutton fist, in which was glass he angry eyed
the intruder. 90 am, said he "a doctor o. the Uni
versity Of Erlangen, homo ,pahst, and going
TO Schoppenstedt to accept Office" ," replied the
doctor, " am doctor Of Prague, am alopathist,
Each stood silent for a few minutes, throwing out
angry looks AT length the homeopathic exclaimed
"Aiopathy IS the old leaven OF the Phstines" 'iIo-
mGopathy," retorted DOCTOR " is the bantling OF
the devil" pause. The Home )pathist exclaim-
feo, Herr, you arc arrogant The alOpathist re-
pied, Herr, you are an ignoramu'."
Now, when doctor says to another 4" You are
ignorant" it is if the Emperor Of China said "a
ing any more opium" In tn eases hosttes mus
ensue. Our heroes commenced the combat The
aopa,hst, being the stronger man, at length threw
his antagonist the ground, placed his knee on hi.
chest, and drew from ms coatpocket a tooth instru
ment. The yanqushed, viewing these proceedings
exclaimed, =" What are you about Are you going Il
murder me ~ " BE quiet" said the aopathist; a.
wish 10 show you my skill, by drawing one Of your
molar teeth" The homeopathic pleaded eloquent
" Tor the non'disiurbance of hls grinders -yainly
however but his good luck saved him The ins,ru
ment was just placed the TOOTH when the efiusior
of quantity Of cold water on the head Of them
both caused the victor to LIT 60 his hold Both sprang
on Their fect, and saw in gray rock coat and
smoothed combed hair, observing the happy result OF
his interference. " Good good" said he " the pa.
roxysm is over.n "What is overi" said the aloha.
thlst :" and who you :" 81 am,n replied he
with dignity, " an hydropathst-in German, a water
doctor ! am going to Schoppensadt. am sure Of
the appointment, for you see and feel that my mode
Of cure is certain" The homeopathic laughed
heartily At length, said he II is a curious colpci-
dence, we are all the same GRAND | propose
that we shake hands and proceed at once TO dinner
After re-adJusting their persons, they went to the
dining-room and made a vigorous onslaught on the
,iands. The aopa,hist drank a bottle Of Rudes-
hemer, the homG jpathist slipped Madeira, the by
dropathist drank water. The bill paid they pro-
ceeded to Schoppenstadt the next day presented
themselves TO the council, and announced their
Pectiye claims for the appointment
The bergomaster rose from las seat, and in a neat
and eloquent speech, explained to them the duties OF
has office. lie spoke much TO the purpose, that
one might suppose he had studied the arr himself -
lie informed them that II was the custom of the
place that candidates for Office should give proof OF
their capability. This rule would Apply 10 them in
the present instance; he whom they believed to be
The most skiliul wouldbe appointed. 1--WE have now
Three patients in the hospital is consumpve the
second mar yr 10 the govt, and the third has drop.
sy Draw lots as to the choice Of the cure" The
doctors assented went to the hospital and decided
by the throw of the dice. The alopahst threw the
highest and chose for treatment the consumptye pa
tient.
The trio saw that the cases were hopeless. The
alopoihist, however wrote a prescription, at which
The apothecary laughed in hs sleeve. II daily