Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1843-12-08


deserved to be we'll msrued, that he o
oushI 10 have the most smiabIe ard K. a
celen, woman on earth. How far hs I
wife answers to this dTscriplIon, the b
reader shall judge from Peters account :,
OF her.
NV better half ssys Peier,-I call
her my better hall, because she s con
Siderable betlerrhun holf Of us two. We
weigh between Us, just tour hundred =
AID weigh ONLY hundred and fifty. {
Bu, she's good vile for all that.
Nv better ha as ! wa' saying, is
Lutte grain taller than am. say six ~
ches-and OF course, she looks down
upon me. in somo measure, as lluls .
bsnsalh ter; which you know ls no' so /
agreeable 10 man who va'ues himself /
upon his inches Bat she'savery good I
wife Tor all that.
rs 40 matter. how tall a woman 10,
you'll say, provided she's sIsnier e.
nough to make it up, Now that's jo''
no the case with my wife AZ she's
uncommonly tall 50 also she's remark
aby thick She lakps up great deai
more than ons ha Of bed and board
/ She crowds me out as II were, And
( then when she sleeps, what trumpet
she blows. She's a snor,er can tell
, you, but she's very good wife 'or all
: that
A When first married her, she promi-
sed to love. honor aud obey and a that
q kind Of lhlng Bot had no sooner gcl
n her soUg and fast, than she began TO
show her brorlin up. Why saws ahe
. perer. YOU little sniliin you. DO you hjnk
Vt I'm agong to obey r man that an't high
9 er than my shouIdar!--lha, am goln to
n. honor mao that can whip as easy as
le | can snap my thumh?-and that | am
le goin TO love = man that don't neither
IN honor nor obey? She said that to me
n, before NO had been married twenty
e. tour hours. But she's a very good wife
~ lOr all that.
er When our frs, child was born. and
k wanted him called Peter sfter mySel
ne Won know What does nv wife say I
,a mel She save, says she, Peter Pumkl
II she always Cats me that. though N
he. name is Peer PLACID she says. say
On .he, Peter Pumkln, you're not to hav
as no child " nine called aher yourself n
how-you're too small for that
en mama him myself Id have YOU kHoV
to He shall be called Scioggln-don't sag
An word, Peser-he shall be called Scro
y g,n say Blu, she's very good hous
Of wife for ell that.
and When come in from work cod, VI
and and hungry and ask my wife for som
ed. thing warm and dry to pu, on. and soc
Ine thing comfortable 10 eat and drink, wh
the does she say rhen2 Why she says, ga
the she, Peter. you're the Iormen. OF n
ex lille. You're always plagu'n my life =
'uNd Tor somelhinp or other. Do you 'hli
red Eve nothing better to do than 10 be wa
rom ing On you all the t,me' But If y
de- please my love, I'm cold, and wet a
il il hungry, saws Well, what if sou a
ling saws she. ls that any Of my bread a
buuer? You may warm yourself, d
'ord dry yourself, and cook your own viclG
mid, and be hanged TO YOU. But she's Vt
inal good wife for all that,
both II things don't go to please her,
Is OF rips and tears round like n bedIam
that She's got voice like seven thunde
? IN and. her tongue runs all day like a I
here cack. II is one continued stream
f the scold, scoId II | pu, iD one word
anIs puts in ten. II grin and bear II,
patience on Grindslone, it ONLY T
and vokcs her worse, and she don't SOL
Iden word, neither Do YOU see this sea
been nv mise. and this handful OF hair G
pwe off my scalp2 But she's very g.
who wife for all that
more Scoldng wives, they say. are ap
are he Industrious. and lidy, and to keep
ery thing in prime order. Bat Mrs
I in CD is far from all that. She cant
larks accused OF over work. or over meet
three can toll you She doesn't rise in
is Of morning TIL noon; and when she
rror, rise, she doesn't DO any thing but G.
TO perc'aw. She neither washes heu
ming nor her children, nor her clothes.
, in neither cooks. nor makes, nor M"
,ains She neither brews, nor bskes, nor swt
nanv tbs house, nor makes the beds.
good she's Ve:y good wife Tor all'ha''
e are never srav out late, and drink
eroe, too much And vet when ! come h
hove it's like as not End the door locke
aod na,nst me. knock and she bawls
'ered who's there7' |. Well, says
mlds may 90 TO grass, snvs she. Thank
the my love, says but il you please
q E to come in don't please and you
'ogan stay out, says she. And then as IIE
Mem not, she raises window and empt
ombs pail of water upon my head. buI
polls. a very good wife for all that
a.