Burlington free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1827-1865, 1843-11-24
DISAPPOINTING A LANDLORD.

DlSA WIN 11TNU n La IN1JlAO16 u
Persons who have staged it a great deal
are aware that the eating houses along the
pixies are not always the best houses by a
jug full. The following brief dialogue be.
tween a driver on the National road, and a
landlord whose establishment was the
most uninviting one to be met with in ten
miles around, will partially elucidate the
matter.
The name of Boniface is Screwler, and
that of the driver, Lewis.
See here SIR said Screwler, one day, as
John came in for his grog, after watering
his team, { why can't you push on "A little fas-
ter, and dine your passengers here
'Well, dino. We've dined at Parker's
so long that the passengers all expect to stop
there'-throwing down three cents for grog
as he said this.
'Oh no-never mind that. Drink when
ever you come along ScreTlcr said, push
ing back the change which Lewis pocket
ed without any computations. l don't
intend charging stage drivers anything after
this
Il wish old Parker was only as consider
ate,' the driver remarked half aloud.
odd Parker's hog = Screwler said, with
a curl of the lip. He's got rich out of the
passengers, and thinks he is safe for them
just as long as he chooses 10 keep his house
OPEN
Il don't know how that'll be- Jehu re-
turned, musingIy. THE passengers grum-
BILE a good deal sometimes at his fare.'
He don't know how 10 set a good Ia
BILE. He never was fit to keep a good tav-
ern.'
sI'm half of your opin-
Halo, driver! are you going TO keep us
here all day?' screamed out an impatient
passengers at this stage of the confab.
Don't burst your buttons of, mister!'
m@nttcrcd the driver then resuming.
I'm half of your opinion. The fact is,
ihe old scamp is getting crusty, He is got
above HIMSELF
Take another drink, Luz. And the
landlord set out the bottle again.
Lu, nothing 10th, helped himself freely.
Driver! halo = reared out another pas
senger.
sWe'll talk this matter over again, when
YOU come down. l can make it your inter-
est to drive here
'Very well, landlord
And Lu walked very leisurely ont, and
mounting his box, cracked his whip, and
was off.
When he came down, Screwler met him
at the door, all smiles and attentions. The
hos,ler was ordered to give the team water,
while Lu, was taken into the bar, and freely
piled with the hest.
Well, landlord, Eve been thinking oil
that matter a good deal since l saw you, and
I don't know but one objection. l never
get along here before half past three, and
that is so late. The passengers will grum.
BILE like every thing. Breakfast to throw
custom in Wilford's way, who is agent, yol
know, is at six o'clock. From nine to tel
hours is a long time. And then Grimes
must have them to supper, and he is onl.
two hours and a half from here. l reall.
don't know how it will work. Grimes yo,
know, is agent, and will take care TO tea tn
passengers. And, besides, his consent t
change must be gained
'Grimes? Oh! you can manage him J
Howl
Tell him if the passengers dine here
they can't eat so much supper. Ha ha!
will be the very thing for him.
so it will by jingo! But, then, sha
have my hands full to get on with
stage load of hungry grumbling passer
gers
sNever mind, SIR and Screwler patio
patted him on the shoulder. your gre
shan't cost you a cent here. And that
something
The driver still hesitated; and the LAM
lord debated in his own mind whether
ought not to make a mole liberal offer. !
length he said
'ITl tell you what sir! If you will ma
age to get Grimes to consent to make II
the dining place, instead of Parker's, l
give you a ftp a head for every passeng
you bring
Agreed quickly replied John.
'How soonT
In a week. l know Grimes. Eve
man has his price, if you take care not
offend him when you make the ofer.'
Sure enough, in a week Parker was no
fed by the agent that he need not provi
dinner any longer, as the stage would go
10 Screwler's. Parker of course, FRET
and fumed, &C., but Screwler got the fee
ing of the passengers, who, if the tr,
must be told, profted by the change.
1t was not long, however, before he d
covered, that, what with the per centage
Lewis, and the keen appetites of the p
sengers who tasted nothing from six o'clo
in the morning until half past three in
afternoon. he was : advancing backwar
instead of improving his purse by the OPP
alton. This both troubled and NORTH
him.
Il don't know Lu; I'm afraid | shall ha
to give up the dining Of passengers.
loosing business, I 6nd.' Screwler said to
driver with , long face, as that individ