Wheeling times and advertiser. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1839-1849, 1843-08-09
From the New York Spirril Of the Times.
4 TEXAS JOKER.


Some three years ago we copied the
following sterling bit of fun from the
Texas Morning STAR published at
Houston. Ii lately fell ia our way a.
gam, ami we Were so tlcklcd upon read.
! ing ii once more, that we determined 10
start 1t i"r a second heat. We will take
small odds that in three months time il
will have been repuHIshed in half the
newspapers IN the country
AQUATIC SCENERY during the hard
est OF the storm the dag before ves,er-
day,we took Il lounge down 10 the steam.
boat landlngi--w while standing on the
brink OF a deep guIley that empIied its
torrent oi water into the bayou, our at.
lentlon was attracted 10 the bottom of
the gulley, where drunken loaler was
sIemmIng the torrent, holding on to n
root las! anchored in the bank. The
poor fellow, not knowing any one was
near him, was combating his fate man
iuiIy, and In calculating his chances of
escape. gave utlernGce To the following
'lIaynt tins an Orlul salvation TO be
placed in, nohow! III was steamboat
a raIi, or wood Pile,l'd be better worth
hlty cents on the dollar than I'll ever be
again. Unless Pm gone case now.
there haynt no truth in frenOlouy. I've
weighed all the chances now like a rin-
eral, and Ind only two that bears I'm nv
favor; The first is a skunk hole to crawl
INTO, and the second a special interposI-
ton OF Providence; and the best chance
oil The two IS so slim, il only had the
change,Pd give premium for the skunk
hole-them's my sentiments. III could |
be mink, muskral, or water snake. |
Tor about two onths,prehaps wouldn't
mount the stump rOther side Of the Bio. !
and Hap my wings and crow over ever. |
lasiln' life, scientifically preservsted.-
But what's the use holdin' on this roof
there haynt no skunk hole In these ere
dI99Insj the water is Citing taller about |
ieel' and II my nose was as long as /
kingdom come, 1t wouldn't stick ont
much LONGER. Oh Jerry! Jerryl vou,re
a gone sucker, and | guess YOUR marin
don't know you're out; po,r woman
won she cry the glasses OUT of her |
SPecIac'es When she hears her darlin' !
Jerry mas got the whole Of Buffalo Rio !
Tor his collin? What a pity Ills some
: phIlanthropis,or member Of the humane
SOCieIy' never mad foresight enough 10
bu!Id house over this gutter, win -
steam engine to keep out the waferl NIL
they'd done il in time, they mrrht have
had the honor and qualification orsav,ng
the life Of ie'ler being: but us all dav
with you, Jerry and a big harbor to cas-,
anchor IN. IIs too bad 10 20 off in this
|oriul manner, when they knows oilers
hated water ever since | was big enough
TO know 'twant whiskey. / feel The
root glvIn' way, aud since don't know
a prayer, here's a bit Of Watts Doxolo.
ger, to prove died Christian:
On lhe bank where dropped the wilIcr.
Long time ugU.
Before Jerry got TO the conclusion. Inc
was washed into the bayou, within re y
feet Of large fiat that had Just started
! for the steamboat his eye caught the
prospect Of deliyerauce, and he changed
the burden Of hio dirgo into a thrilling
lcry Of 'ileavo lo! passenger overheard
and sinking, with bolt full Of specie!