Herald of the times. [volume] (Newport, R.I.) 1830-1846, 1843-01-12

w hni rsn nave hhPrtn'uf Nhh' 's '""
n,at,~r 2
You may possibly rernember, that
when ] was nm unmarried young man
about town, | was afflicted like many
other worthy young men, with sort NJ
rhvming mnnia, which, like the hn"ping
cough and the measles, attacks vri,a'n
juvenile constitutions, some with morr
and some with less virulepce. ! had u
very badly for time, as many M album
aud many n country newspaper will yet
hear witness. In ,hr height ol NV com
plaint rnruuniersh my present wiic.
then Miss Myrtle, n pretty, romantic girl
in short n congenial spirt, who ad-
pircd my poetry (poetry indeed and
PLAYED Eloisr ~ my Abrlarl. ! mar
ned her. Wrcichcd blunder fatal er-
ror ....
Explain yourself
ID, YOU not s'e NV wife was n
blu, stocking and u ues,ocking she is
still
Pray, what is n blue .siorking ?
Alas |! ! can give y"u whole voca-
bnlnry "f definitions. She is a woman,
Plngg, who wears blue -slorklngs instend
of white, because they do not show ih"
dirt ~ sooo, whereby she Is saved the
trouble of chang Ing them ns often aS
CLEANLINESS would suggcst. She Is n
literary character and u precious litter
she keeps abont her to he sure. She
- an individual, who l. lno much absorb
q in her own sublime imaginings TO
attend 10 the vulgar details of house
h lid. She Is cnr.eSs and slattrrnly IN
her attire, because she has heard that
iniliif-rrncr Ia dress H. a mark al genius.
She n"glrcts her children, because she
better loves the offspring oi her brain -
She prefers the vrnial praise of some
dunce of u critic To her husbands ahec-
ti"n. She would rather have you call
her a bad wife than find fault with her
Ode to Despair. She bores her viSIter-
by reading her productions aloud, and
~ too lost IN her own complacency To
witness their mnpaiIrnce and their sueers.
In short she u u sort oi Lady Macbeth,
who instead oi plotting agains, the life
nj Duncan murders the Quren's Eug-
llsh'
And is it possible, Dick, that your
vile ~ such "A woman as you describe /"
w Iibuut eXaggerdtIon she is. PIuggi
il was no later Than last night that she
woke me up lroH my first doze, saying,
that IL fine idea had entered her head,
and she musi, note II down. She rose
from The bed and lit the Iamp-n"i, how
ever, before she had knocked down
book or two, aud walked The baby by the
u"Ise. Without taking the Slightest mo-
tee oi lis crying, she sal down at II writ
Ing table, anu was soon ~ n iine irenZv,'
over some trashy productioD, which she
calls nu ode. Aud there was | sitting
up,lghi aud shlverng ~ bed, with the
haby screaming ~ my aIDs, while Mrs.
Flulirr ~as J"llns down her line IDEAS
EInn looIey Ry George, it is too
Nnd.'
80 it IL, Drck. We must iud some
way III returning it. | really believe
your ~,ir - ~ heart 'all correct as the
politicians say
Il can'I helu laughing when think OF
the rId"ulnus figure ! cut rocking The
baby 10 ana tr", ~ my Dight-cluthes,
while The mother was writing poriry--
'pIlIne up the agony as The western
theatrical crlilc sad Oi Forrest. Ii was
n ,lch scene tor u painter. What thing
CTukshank would make OF II y
'Ha, hd, la ] See ynu can extract
some iun from your misrry. What II
subtle chcnnsi Is II sunny temper !!
Any olher mau but NY sell would go
mad, am sure, with such wife. My
dear friend, II was but the other day,
the day ot the Croton celebraiion,( that
Oh coming hume, iatIgued aud sleepy,
1 iearnI that all the servants in the house
had been permitted io 70 10 the theatre
Enlcilng my chamber, found the bed
unnade /; and viii you believe it, Mrs
FIuitrI Insis:rd "n my making It myself,
because she was Just III the midst OF
story, which she had promised To com
peic for so'ne sIckly magazine
You made the bed of course
w hat could | do but submit Every
day am subjected 10 similar impositions.
ii u washer woman Is 10 be hlrcd, or
baubIe bought for the baby, have to
execute the commission. NV wIe's |
genius scars above such pal,ry domestic
arrangements She will have To take
but one step more to set me to mendlng
stockings, or washing dishes
But D,ck-~ho encourages your wife |
IN these p,eposIcrous PRACTICES p
"A lew sredy gentlemen in black
hangers-on upon newspapers and perIodl- 4
Gala, whpn she invites to dinner, aud who 1
puy Tor 'heir grub ~ puIis. One oi them
calico her The other day the Madame |
&c SIacl 81 AmeIIca and they all make /
hrr out the greatest literary phenom- 4
'nvn al the century. What hearty /
laughs they must have among themselves
at her inlaIualInn aud ciedulily . BY |
the way, she has invited some Of them
io supper this evening. The poor devils
"re willing TO swallow her poetry for the
."Ne "i The dsrlmtmis winch accompany
n-s'r~ed oysItrs, chicken salad, and
rnIn pagne.'
is 'nete p2 way Of unmnsbing The
la,a.n,s d"
! can ttit,, eI Uoas--can YOU = II
'irs Snpp'sr W. II