Staunton spectator, and general advertiser. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 183?-1849, 1843-06-15
Ell I s. q 8 Il u a 81 Y o
PAU PLANT,
COR THE MAN WHO COULDN'T SAY NO.
ny THE AUTHOR OF YANKEE NOTIONS

Two negatives, they say, make an allirma-
tive. Therefore, | think it safe to suppose that
Paul Plants father and mother must have
been as negative pair ever came together,
for Paul was the most affirmative man that
has been heard of. He always said yes to
every thing that was said, proposed, suggest
ed, insinuated, or limited TO him. He was
true administration mani under all govern
ments, never being i'll the opposition. He
was ore of those over polite, over good ma
tnred, oh be easy, acquiescent morlals, who
seem 10 be sent into tne world for no other
purpose than to show how much man may
suffer for want of a little contra-mindedness
"Yes.' Certainly 'By all means' No doubt
of it, with all my heart very happy to
oblge YOU Entirely at your servce' ooh
yes ooh yes 'Oh yes.' Such were Puul's
constant replies As 10 saying 'no,' 1t was as
impossible to get it out, as Macbeth's sAmen =
When he had most need of denying, it stuck
i'll his throat ] don't know that he ever sat
in the Legislature, but / am sure that if he ever
did, when the yeas, had it, they had Paul
also. He wouldnot have creid '.Nie poSwalam'
in the Polish diet, if the words could have de-
mollshed the partition treaty. Though he
was not in the opposition, yet think it hard
y correct to call him Jackson man, for he
never vetoed any thing in his life, unless, in
the style of the honest country representative,
Mr.. Speaker ] shall give my veto in favor
of this bil.' In short, Paul was the very
pink of assentients-an incarnation of mem
con.
Now this is very good character FOR man
10 bear, on some accounts, for it gets one the
reputation Of good nalured fellow, and as the
world commonly pretends to have high O.
pinion ola good natured fellow, and according
to the proverb sopinIon is the queen of the
world the reader may think Paul must have
had happy time of it. No such thing.
Paul's good Eature brought him into more en-
barassments and veXations than if he had been
the crosset cur that ever snarled. speak not
of lending umbrellas-'tis the lot of mortality
To lend money is about the same, though
money lent sometimes comes back.-But who
would believe that good-natured man, mere
| ly by reason of his good nature, and for no
other fault under the sun, could be led through
such a rigmarolc dance Of adventure by the
perversity of fortune, that he fought duel and
almost married a widow
The widow Wiful was lady OF certain
age; she had made the best of time, and time
returned the compliment. She had shed many
tears for the loss of her good man--so she
protested, and cannot help thinking she spoke
the truth, for she tried very hard to get anoil-
er. However, this did not prove so easy a
matter, for although the widow was not with
! out charms, the men were shy. What could
be the reason1 She gave splendid parties, and
had sparks and danglers without number, but
it was never match. What could be the rea-
son the reader will ask again.
1t is not exactly my business to tell, as the
story vii! be plain enough without it, and il
the reader cannot guess, it would not much
help him to let out the whole mystery.
This is truly delightful said Paul, one
evening, to the widow, as he leaned his arm
over the back of the chair, worked his lace up
TO the blandest OF all his acquiescent smiles
and essayed some 1atering compliment con-
corning the widows fine entertainment, This
is truly delightful so much hilarity anC
cheerluness-so many happy faces. love
TO look on them
! Paul inadvertently raised his eyes as he ut
tered these words, and at the close of thc
speech was looking straight into the widow
face. lie meant not the least harm in Oh,
world; but the widow pretended to blush
She Pursed up her pretty mouth.
| 'Oh, Mr.. Plant, you are great natterer5 bu
we know you are honest. You never say
one thing and mean another