The New York herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1840-1920, 1842-09-11

| Public Cu1osty-Petticoat Government Grand Pa
Mieai determination of Captain Tyer-
Secret Object Of IVebstg's Vist to Boston, Gran
mics Jen1er and Todd-Mrs Sears-Nfiss Rev
nohs-1riumrirate Of Broken Doicl Lotharios-
Adpice to Gentlemen Of Certain Age-Tfoube 1,
the Chmeh-Money Matt9s-CLcrks at Washing
fon-A Magdalea- Woman-Hy Sublime Cha
raeter and Unhappy Destiny.
DEAR GENERAL:-
1t would aInuse you to stroll round the hotels anc
coffee houses, the boarding establishments and bill
lard rooms, and hear the question pass from one &c
one, "Who writes Benefits correspondence from
this city| Some say it Is Blair-some Dr. Martin
some 10. Gales, and others Captain Tyler himself
Whether any of these conectures be right or not
you can determination myself Iashal not CRAFTY
public curiosity, but shall continue to glass the Incl
dents OF the place, and shoot folly as it flies ~
without fear or favor, certain that shall never se
down aught in malice" l intend to champion the
| lovely but abused women of this city, and show
how superior they are, in all respects, to the
masculine portion of our population. For yir.
tue, economy, industry, talent and goodness, there
10 no sort OF comparison. General Harrison made
the remark IN ten days after his Inauguration he
repeated 1t the day before he died. and Captain Ty-
eris about to establish new era, by turning out the
husbands, dressing them up in aprons and caps put
| them to washing potatoes, and place their meek,
smart, pretty little wives in office. This would be
| slorious-t would be a new experiment in govern
ment, and would be known in history as the petit
coat dynasty. Let the Captain do this, and his re-
election is certain let him rally the girls around
him and the bishops would be there too-and against
| such influence, what could Clay with his Durham
| heifers, Van Buren, with his purid cabbages, Cal
| houn with his gold mines, or Johnson
| with his odoriferous mistress, affect! The
| Captain has had an eye to this movement a long
hme-for example his selecting granny Jones as
| his organ, and appointing sundry old women
In bIeeches, to office here and elsewhere II cur
reniy believed that the majority of the heads of
bureaux in the different departments are really old
matrons dressed uPin pants, for they are queruous
lazy, imhecile and ignorant This is great mis-
take on the part of the Captain-et him put out the
old 'uns, send them to the aims house, book them
| Tor porrnger OF soup every day, and put in their
place young, sy-cheeked, snowy-bosomed, swan
necked, bright-eyed, dmple- chinned women, one
smile from whose lips will set the blood clrcling
| through ones veins, and push government a head
with double steam power. This is my great scheme
OF reform 1t involves no expense and if Capt. Ty
| Ter adopts it, and you devote the Herald, with its
$4,000 subscribers, and vast moral religious, litera-
ry social and political influence to its support his
administration will triumph over all the cques and
factions now banded against it, Black Dan is dee
dedy In favor of the proiet, and swears that he in
tends to begin 1t by recalling mother Jenfer, from
Vienna, and sending out Yankee girl, who will
pump Metternch out OF every secret in less than no
time 10 make selection Is really the object of his
visit down east Madame Sears is prominent appli.
cant, but Dan says we are now represented by old
women at all the northern courts, and he is de-
termined to appoint young one. Miss Reynolds
creature looks more lovely than ever, and hundreds
are signing at her feet. Two or three members OF
Congress remain here on the pretext of attending to
business, but 1t is the influence of this magnificent
sylvania, was deeply smitten; King of Alabama, is
broken hearted, and poor Cuthbert actually had a
fit. The Reynolds pited Them she was kind, but
how could she love men whose heads are actually
crlsped with the frost OF years! No, no my word
for IT, when this gifted and amiable lady,
does bestow the heaven of her charms, it will be on
one who can properly estimate the priceless value,
the incalculable ,affiuence OF such treasure
hacknled gallants of every woman. who
has firted, and figured, and festivalled in
the dissipated circles of the metropolis for twenty
years-men, who, however wise in council or elo
quent in debate, would feel exceedingly awkward
1t they should happen TO win lovely woman in the
very spring time of her projections. | can imagine
nothing more silly and nothing is more certain than
the catastrophe that would ensue. NV advice to ali
gentlemen over fifty, particularly if they have lived
five years here, is to 6 let the gals alone," and
marry widows or old maids of years nearly equal to
their own. We shall then hear less of divorces,
elopements, intrigues and crm cons. and society
would become decidedly more vrtuous.
There is considerable stir here-sub rosa as vet
in one OF our churches. II is whispered that
minister of the orthodox faith has recently exhibited
strong tendency to Puseyism, which is in fact
Catholicism; bat as he is man of great influence,
many efforts are being secretly made to hush the
matter up, and handsome addition to his salary
ls talked Of but where is the needfu to come from1
You may perhaps call spirits from the Vastly Deep
like the witch OF Endor, you may be able to re-
animate the ghastly Tor and vsages of the dead,
but 1t requires more potent spell to raise money in
this stricken city Congress, by its msera
Bile, contemplate vote-catchng, ad captandun re-
trenchment process has starved our clerks, re-
duced them to the lowest point at which men can
possibly live, as II to ascertain how much human
nature can endure, and yet they are compelled to
hold on TO the little that is left, with the grip Of
dying man. Let no man seek a cerkshp at Wash
ington; it is a hard and thankless service-an OBJ
scure and toilsome berth poor you are sure to de-
may write over your walls the despairing words of
Dante, He who enters here leaves all hope behind"
In very wretchedness the poor clerk, disappointed
IN his promise of promotion, becomes reckless. He
are never realized, and the waters of bitterness
overflow his soul. To be successful, he must
be the toady of some swollen superior; he must
hang on the skirts OF an intriguing Con-
gresham, or, more revolving still, play the
spy and normer to the party in power must stoop
to tricks that dam up forever the fountains of honor
and bring promotion and infamy and self-degrada-
ton hand in hand. If he scom TO do this, and feels
me dignity OF an honest man, as Pope and Burns
felt H. in the noblest creations of their intellect he
doomed to long life OF proftess service, or an
early and unhonored tomb. No flowers bloom in
his path, and when the woman he has loved plants
one upon his grave, the very ptance that she thus
pously employs must deprive her little orphans of
meal Andthis is a clerkship, so much sought
for, SO much envied, at Washington, by those who
do not know its horrid details Better, far better,
co. IN fhof lab
Ito nestle on the flower-scented praires, and hew
out living from wood and earth, than seek gilt
tering bauble that always disappoints Why, once
knew $1,000 clerk lay three days corpse before
money enough to provide for his interment could be
procured; and his wretched family, an aged mother
two sisters, wife and seven children-but
will draw veil ever so much misery, nor detail the
vlcissltades that carried some to an early grave,
house, and one so lovely, so innocent, yet, alas
too easily deceived 10 fate shndder 10 think of