Wheeling times and advertiser. [volume] (Wheeling, Va. [W. Va.]) 1839-1849, 1842-04-02

We must laugh ~ well ~ cry in lhs world. A.
l1s, week was q sd one let linz be more cheerful
Tnr i~oI'oNing quizzical siry was told at n tempe.
rnnre neeting in Hartford last weck.by a reformed
topper. Il opens uci ani A. The m "a has hespmc So
Der one NAV now laugh over his a5sur lilies ~ an o
double relish. lie said
Il used to drink and NV wife us.d to Jaw me nbout
il. WHAT d o Won get drunk lorl sail she; what do
you Jaw me fort SAID I. 81 we agreed and IN ,de a
firm barg un that I W 'uld not drink md she would
me- scoll, For hires long days we held on firm -
no drinking nor scolIins bu'i On the ihrd evening
being ~ compIny with some god { How. I took a
horn aud when that was dawn, right of uaqied
another, and on a very shori time ] found myself a
o,uI how fare Won" with twenty horns safe and
snugly ia my bread biskei tremendous laughter
By and by u got To he time 10 60 home buI a. you
my well sup iose / dreaded lo IN set my wife like
Inc tooth ache liaughicr) Hpweycr. q I mnsi
and 81 { staggered along hoping 10 fnI my wife a.
bed, CaugiieT) When ] reached the house I
found il 81 I lighted and through The window I saw
my wife up aud awaiting for me. ILaughtsr-
Think ] | can't 60 IN yet, but I must wait ill she
goes to bel so there s,oud half freezing IN the
cold rain Two hours. [Irsmendoos llnghierl A
lasi she went 20 bed and Icrept IN the hack door
stumbling over pails aud chairs bat finally snrcred
ed in getting To bed without disturbing her
ilnEh'ri) hut after o. zing a while awoke and
found my.ef rs day ns q f-h I%Iaughlcr You
know hre bern how dry wc all used Va be IN the
night after Ned had q spree tremendous daughters,
Ny wife always anew what was Inc matter win
fno when I gi up ~ the night 10 dunk cold waller
fnughicr) ! hardly dared 10 get up Gr fear II my
vile. hnt my thirst WIS greater Than J rould hear
OaugherJ - not I cmyyl'd md CROPPED very sOnly
after The water pill llaugh,ej but no water Wa
there t%Ianghte) ! then fell r"und In the dark on The
tables and shelves FOR sanelhiug 10 cool my burning
thirst, Tremendous laughIer) SOM I found a in pan
fII u liquid something, ! seized and PM il 10 nv
mouth, and took a long and hearty drauzht-
Che liquor Of The same time running DOT nt each
side Of my mouth. down my cheeks. tremendous
l%anghterJ and 50 | thought he liquor tasted odd.
and Of lbat. instant 1t flashed on nv recollection rhar
had fixed some poison n few days before 10 Nil
rats with. tremendous laughter for FIVE minutes }-
Horrpr-sirutk, / siOod-my hair standing on on end
iii was death 10 scream out, ior my wife would
jaw me ,if she walked, laughing and stumpinp3 and
surely % would be death 10 bold SILL; but scream I
must, and scream ! did. lrrolous lauEhtor) What
was in hat pau7' You nc dry. nre ypn1' a,iJ
she. "What was 10 his pant" shouted I sell loud.
err What makes You dryi' screamed che
What was ~ this psp'' yelled ]. m perfect agony
Of tear What pau1' why. the plL on The
SHELF 90, you brute. ypn have drank nv starch 10
Tremendous lnnshler mr Eve minutes. and crics Of
IrIer from The chaifmln) The next u,Orninr my
shin collar was pasted fst 10 ny neck and rhccIs
end % iuuk bali on ho1r 10 clear % nT Here Mr.
Brown sst down amid lie cheers oriho xhiIo Sci
cty.