Boon's Lick times. [volume] (Fayette, Mo.) 1840-1848, 1842-05-07
SAY TT WAS UME.D

SAY IT WAS "ME."
sim! you rascal, get up! get up, and be
hanged TO you, sir; don't you hear some
body hammering and pelting away at the
street door knocker, like the ghost of
dead postman with terrain ague. Open
1t! see what's the matter will your"
"Yes, STRIP responded the tame tiger Of
the excited and highly respectable Adol-
plus Casay, shiveringly emerging from be-
round his aching head, to deaden the inces-
SAINT clamor Of the iron which was entering
into the soul OF his sleep. A hastily per-
formed toilet, in which the more established
method of encasng the lower man with
ahe front of the garment to the front Of
the wearer, was curiously reversed, and the
capture Of the left slipper, which, as the
weakest goes to the WALL the right foot had
thrust itself into, was scarcely effected, ere
another series of knocks at the door, and
batch of invectives from Mr.. Adolphus Ca
say, hurried the partial sacrificer to the
Graces, at Derby pace, over the cold
staircase, to discover the cause of the con-
founded uproar. The door was opened
confused tumble Of unintellgible mutter-
ings aggravated the eager ears Of the shiver-
ing Adolphus. Losing all patience, he ex-
claimed, in tone of thunder
what is it, you villan' Can't you
speakr
yes, sir, in course can
Then why don't you,. you imp of mis-
chiefr
'Pm going to-
DO it at once-let me know the worst.
Is it fire, murder, or thieves?
'Neither, sir; it's A |, with dark Ian
thorn"
'What, in the name of persecution and
the new police, does A |, with a dark Ian
thorn, want with me?'
please, sir, Mr.. Brown Bunkem has give
him half a crown
well, you little ruffian, what's that to
me?,'
why, sir, he Civ it him to come here, and
ask you--'
Here policeman A |, with the dark Ian
thorn, took up the conversation.
tJist step down to the station us, and
bal him therefrom-
'For whatn
Being very drunk--uncommon over
come, surely-and oudacious obstropelous,'
continued the al phabetically and numerical
ly distinguished conservator Of the public
peace.
How did he get there!
'On very heavily-laden stretcher.'
'The duce take the mad FOOL muttered
the disturbed housekeeper; then added, in
a louder tone, Ask the policeman in, and
request him 10 take
ANY thing you please, sir; it is rather a
cold night, but as we're all in a hurry sup
pose it's something short, SIR,
Now the original proposition, common
cling with the word 'take,' was meant by
It's propounder to achieve its climax in "a
seat in one of the hall chars;' but the H.
quid differences of A !, with dark anthorn,
had the desired effect, and induced com
mand from Mr.. Adolphus Casay, 10 the
small essential essence of condensed vale
lanism in the person of Jim Pipkin, to pro-
duce the case bottles for the discussion oil
the said A |, with the dark lanthorn, who
gained considerably in the good opinion Of
Mr.. James Pipkin, by requesting the favor
of his company in the bibacious avocation
he SO much delighted in.
A having expressed decided convc
ton that, any where but on the collar Of
his coat or the date of monthly imprison
rnent, his distinguishing number was the
most npeasant and unsociai of the whole
multiplication table, further proceeded to il
iustrate his remarks by proposing glasses
Two and three, to the great delight and inc
briation OF the small James Pipkin, who wa
suddenly aroused from dreamy contem
plation Of two policeman, and Increases
service of case bottles and liquor glasses
by a sound box on the ear, and stern com
mand to retire to his own proper dormitor,
the one coming from the hand, the othe
from the lips, OF his annoyed master, VIII
then and there departed, under the guidance
of A /, with the dark lanthorn. After pas
sing various lanes and weary ways, tn
station was reached, and there, in the fu
plenitude of glorious drunkenness, lay hi
friend, the identical Mr.. Brown Bunkcn
who, in the emphatic words of the inspec
tor, was declared to be Just about as ia
gone as any genteman's son need wish t.
be-
What's the charger commenced Mr.. A
dol phus Casay.
eleven sh,lllngs bottle. Take it GU
Of that, and d--n the expense interpose
= and hiccoughed the overiiken Brown Bun
KEN.