Mobile daily commercial register and patriot., 1841-09-08
From the Rnston post.


 Ike Best Story Euer foid-A correspondent has sent the following capital story, over which we have laughed until our sides ached.
 N We hada pleasant tri p from New Orleans to Cincinnati, and had scarcely landed at the latter place when the bell of little seamer for Cup the ryer," sounded. Our party hurried )" board and found the dilifinuve craft already crowded but, as we never expect very good accommodations that part of the rver and other opportunity offered for leaving soon, concluded to remain. Upon looking around to what chance there was for amusement on trip from my fellow passengers, l was particularly struck with the appearance of an elderly lady, who seemed very i'll at ease.-EVery time allowed to escape from the boiler she appeared fancy it the prelude grand explosion, and evidently in state of continual excitement. As she is to te my heroine, l may well attempt to describe her, although shall hardly do her full justice. She of the talest women ever saw but the effect of her height taken away by her immense breadth She of Mcdonald Clarke's style of beauties-"wth waist like cot ton bag and foot like founder" Never did see such moving mass of flesh encirced by pettcoat. Oh she was pery fat. Upon enquiry l learned that she had been passenger the steamboat F--, at the time it was burned few years before, and rowly escaped wieI her life. Only few weeks had elapsed since the catastrophe of the Ben. Sherrod, by which scores of hapess mortas were hurried into eternity through the combined agency of fire and water. What wonder that the was alarmed at the prospect of steamboat voyage.
 After left the landing, the principal topic of con- versation among the passengers was the numerous accidents which had lately happened Nearly every person equipped with life preseryer, and some were cautious to hang them up in the births filled with air and ready for at a moments warning.- Night came and all were snugly ensconced in their births, when there the cry of fire! The wood on the bow of the boat had caught fire, and was bla- zng ercely up, shining through the glass doors of the social hall and the cabin windows until the whole boat seemed enseloped in a sheet of flame. In an instant all was confusion and alarm. Passengers tumbled ont of their births, and over one another; some grasped their preseryers-some for their baggage-some for their wiyes-the wise ones kept quiet, In the midst of the hubhub, the doors of the ladies' cabin flew wide open and burst onr fat la dy dressed all in white. her face Ga map whereon terror was drawn in all it's shapes, and around her waist huge life preseryer, not inflated. Seizing this by the nipples with both hands, she rushed from one to another eXolamng in voice of agony, ''bow me up biou me up for Gods sake bio,o me up will nobody biop up iP' Had the old lady actually ex- ploded, must have done did, roll on the floor in fit of inextinguishable laughter, with half the witnesses of the scene for my companions. The boat was stopped, the fire got under, and not the least difficult operation, the fat ady's alarm subdued. The next day we landed her at her place of destination, since which time have never seen her, but the recollection of the scene has cost me many fit of the side ache,
 Yours, truly. N.S."