Richmond palladium. [volume] (Richmond, IA [i.e. Ind.]) 1839-1854, 1841-02-27
From the Brother Jonathan.
BOCGHT AT A BARGAIN.

my attending one or two OF the auctions Every
body else goes
'Bu, what do you wish TO buy?'
'Oh--nothing-that is know of nothing
Then of course you want no money
Il didn't say Mat-one would feel SO foolish
you know, without any money in ones purse
But why should zone feel foolish, when
does not wan; to buy.
Now, George, you arc so provoking. ui'e
some money, and say nothing about IL
Easier said than done, my darling.
But you must
'Musf is a hard word
SO Kate thought, and dropt IT, but she managed
10 say sonnet thing else, which answered the pur-
pose. Al any rate she raised the money, and OF
course she attended the auction, because when q
husband wishes his wife wouldn't go any where,
and still furnishes her the means to go II she
chooses, she is more apt naturally to observe the
affirmative implied in the cash than the negative,
however earnestly expressed. Besides all this,
wives very apt TO take liberties with their
husbands good nature. There is a philosophy IN
IL, deeper than women understand themselves.
Though they practice upon 1t. A quiet, good,
compliant body, who ives her husband no trou-
BILE, is like every thing else which gives no trouble
taken no notice Of. 1t requires a small heaven
Of the mrschievous TO keep man properly in his
place. There is no getting along with the men,
without tormeDiing them Just "a little; at least
SO solemnly assured by the ladies'; and we
happen to know that they proceed upon the prin-
Kate went TO the auction, but she went deter
mined not to buy. We know tho fac: because
she protested il to her husband the very last thing
before he left the house; and because she protes
ted the same thing over 10 herself, as she tied on
her hat. To guard against temptation she rolled
the notes very snugy up in her purse, pressing
buck the ring upon them with extraordinary care,
and then very carefully put the purse away-in
her bag, and took her bag upon her arm, as she
sailed out TO hnd some one to accompany her 10
tho sale, which she anxious to attend, pos
itiveIy for-no hing.
1T is u ruinous sacrifice said the uuCtionocr,
the ladies' entered. Ihave seen property fire.
quently thrown away IN my time but never any
thing like this before. Only ten doliars-Tm
offered--ten dollars-ten doilars--ten--ten--ten
--shail say any more? Why should not make
a boot blacks commission off the furniture OF The
Astor House, to sell it Out in this way! Eleven
am offered; thank you nam you show your
observation-disclosures is this not really too bad,
ma'am?'
Our friend Kate, to whom the question was ad-
dressed, with the mans blandest smile, could not
help thinking that il really was pity but how
could she help j, poor thing? Had she possessed
the money Of Cr6sus, she still the absurdliy
of setting up for female phanhropst, to keep
nuctioneers from ruening the country by selling
goods at less than a hundre,h part of their value,
as Mr.. Bell protested he was doing. Still she
sorry that her purse was not at home. The COW
cted article, whatever it was, was knocked down
at the eleven dollars, and some, thing oieo Pu, "I
Kate endured all the suffering of n sensitive
mind, at the absolute bankruptcy that the eloquent
auctioneer made the owners suffer upon every
article sold but she had promised George so pos
itively, and without his requiring PROMISE that
she would buy nothing, that she did not like 70
break her word. She did not even venture on a
single bid, though strongy tempted to do moro
than once, TILL a Brussels carpet was to be sold,
and sold for nothing too as Mr.. Bell solemnv as
sured her il going ,or she certainly would have
determined to buy it. Bl, she dc,ermin-
cd no, 10 buy what could she do, you know?
Hero II is, ladies, nearly new, used only one
season, and that very carefully. Ii cost original
four dollars ard fifty yard and is sold only be-
cause the owner is breaking up housekeeping
There forty yards in the piece more or less.
what shall have for tho carpet! Ten dollars!
you are joking ma'am, worth moro than that To
cover ice in-ton dollars,-why | will give that
for it myself for ms dog 10 sleep on-ten dollars,
worth moro ihnn fifty at the least, ten dollars,
ten guineas would como nearer, ten dol-ten
DOLL
Eleven said Kate. Noe the Rubicon was
pass I'd.
Eleven, thank you ma'nm but you too cru
ell. You taking the advantage Of the owners
necessities, and my positive orders. Eleven dol
twelve I'm offered. and its going, twelve,
twelve, twelve-sorry You've lost it maam for
you look as though you ought TO have it,
'Thirtecn,' cried Kate. She couldn't stand IN
moved ut such an appeal
Thirteen now breathe little, but its only .
O gasp; it's q straw to drowning man but catch
at il. Thirteen. viii you see TINS beautiful
icle sold for less than II would be worth to pack
crockery with torn into shredS; thirteen, thir
fourteen, four, four, one dollar more ma'aG, aud
will nave; fourteen. fnurtecn; quick or YOU
lose it; fourteen, hard ma'am but fair; fourteen
four
TIC make the long story short, Kate bought the
carpet for thirty-two dollars.
When her husband came homo TO dinner he
thought Kate looked fn;igued. So she did, bu,
sho was moro perp!exed Than tired; more ycxcd
in mind with herself, than jlded IN body. She
had more than half a suspicion she had made more
han halt fool of herseif-shc knew the matter
must be preached 10 her husband, and did not be-
gin to see how she to do il.
Lucky George was in a capital good humor.