Southern pioneer, and Carroll, Choctaw and Tallahatchie Counties advertiser. (Carrollton, Miss.) 1840-1842, 1841-03-20

The western Stage Driver.
SKETCHES by TRIz, THE STAGE DRIVER.

SKETCHES by TRIZ, THE STAGE DRIVER.
"l'd rather be dog and bay the moo
than a stage driver" said little muscul
lump of humanity envelopcd in shags In
drab coat, one cool November morning. III
"May be rained into gin shop if standit III
said the driver, mounting into the boot. al III
me see," continued he, ga quarter Of tea f
old mother Sniggs; yard of blue ribbon f Il
Miss Sally Sniggs; candy for Jim; Old ,Harl
away's dog pup fifty leeches for d.. Sangrado 1
feet; the particulars of the fight of Tom WoI
der; election returns; see lawyer Squeeze; not
to Higgins; and think that's all--get alon;
there ye beauties" Crack goes the whip, an,
away rolls the stage down the street, cram
med with nine fellows ripe for fun. "Driver !.
halco driver" shouted a pusky old tdurmint
thick legs could carry him. 81 say, driver
NOR this morning, eh!-here's ten cents, get
make him throw in two pipes this time, and
end if this amt enough money ask him TO
trust me; and if he won't, just hand him the
odd change, and---""Get along there" Crackl
away they 60, leaving the old man to finish
his directions to himself 81 say, driver. said
passenger, poking out Of the window a
sinister looking phiz, abe careful you don't
break the pipes" 'And driver" said another
on the opposite side, "just hand him the odd
change" Crack, crack, crack!-whiz went
the coach--driver getting into real passion
crack!
"Halloo, driver, halloo, driver you son of q
mudgudgeon; Pve lost my hat--you've brush
ed out my eyes, halloo," roared, the last men,
toned unfortunate passenger. "Genily there,
ye beauties, wo, wo, [drivcr getting into a
better humor1 what's the matter therey, very
duizzically inquired the driver. "Matter
POUNDS, my nose is beeding-matter! why
you've rammed a tree top against my head
tore off my hat, and nearly made "a" "Ther
keep your slap-tray inside the COACH" inter
rupted the driver. A general laugh from the
passengers testified their appreciation of the
, sport. ats no laughing matter, gentlemen
assure you," said the unlucky felIow--com-
ing up behind the stage; "look here, gentle
men," presenting himself beside the stage. A
i general and simultaneous busrt of visibility
followed, which fairly shook the stage; it was
long loud and hearty; there stood the unfor-
tunate fellow, the very picture of loaferism;
the rim of his hat stripped nearly from the
body, hanging under his chin, streaks of blood
radiating from his nose, and looking the mis-
cry of wo: it defes description. When hS
countenapce had put on broad grin, for
laugh he must, he looked so pleasingly ridicu-
lous that the driver got into a good humori
and "grinning misery" as one of the passen-
gers dubbed the unfortunate, got into the stage
in the right trim for sport.
"Driver, how far is it to the next tavern?
Driver, where do you change horses? Driver,
where do you breakfast! Driver, how far
have we come! Driver, how far is it to break
fastl' Such, and a thousand other questions,
with commissions from Mother Sniggs, Sally,
and Jim, and tobacco for Ichabod Stops, rem
der the life Of the stage driver, if amusing, an
lirksome one.