The Illinois free trader. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1840-1841, 1841-02-05
Heaven knows what | should do with a

kind, except should it be the supper, and
that to use common but expressive
phrase, don't pay But | write of the
time when was younger. | had not
then seen the folly of the thing and
consented in despite of my better judg-
ment.
The eventiul hour of my first appea-
rance drew nigh. | arrayed myself for
the nonce in a tull-dress suit. with pumps
and silk stockings. abomlnate pumps.
They seem to have been invented on pur-
pose to cripple the wearer. If they are
tight, you are kept in continual torment !;
if loose, they threaten to slip off every
moment; and you are forced TO vancouver
about in them like a eat shod with wal
nuts. The man who first introduced
dress boots, deserves to be enrolled among
| the bcnctactorS of the human race. But
at this time they were not generally
worn so | crammed my feet, as have
said, into pair of pumps. Having per-
formed my additions with the most scrup-
ulous care, and ascertained, by divers
surveys, that was 'cOmne Il faut' in
every respect, cmpticd about half the
contents of bottle of Cologne upon my
white 'kcrchioi took a moderate draught
out Of the same, | mean the botte,) by
way of inspiring myself with a little
Dutch courage, and then drawing on my
gloves, sailed forth.
Now, behold us, myself and cousin,
descending from the dressing-room to
Mrs. Browns welI-iilled parlor, heartily
wished myself safe home again; for i'll
spite of the cologne, felt a sort of all
overishness which, as the novel writer's
say, 'can be more easily imagined than
described 1t was not modesty, nor
bashlulncss these are commodities with
which was never overstockcd. | could
even then, at an examination, rattle off an
eXtemporc translation OF i passage which
| had never before seen, with such rapid
ty as to puzzle the professor completely ;
OF hold a half hours alteration III the
recting room with the tutor, on the pro-
per reading of line in Homer and since
that time, | have delivered lectures, adj
dressed political meetings, called on very
particular friends to borrow money {; and
performed various other acts, which re-
quire all extra quantity of brass. 1t was
the sense of utter unitness for my present
situation, of being completely iReptuS, as
the old Romans used to call it; it was
the consciousness of being as much out
of my element as shad would be on top
of church stecplc. hate to be a cipher
any where; here | was the vcricst OF
ciphers.
We had exchanged the usual civillies
with our hostess; my cousin was sur
rounded by group of beaux, and stood
still and silent, without the slightest idea
of what was to be done next. A young
man approached in a cIaret-colored coat,
yellow gloves, and blue cravat. He was
one Of those cousins or nephews who are
always at hand, on such occasions, to
make themselves generally useful. Mrs
Brown introduced him: we bowed and
shook hands, after the most approved
fashion.
"Do you dance, Mr.. Cebc ~
"Ye-es, that isl believe | know
how"
Let me have the pleasure of introdu
cling you to a young lady" quoth he
and taking possession of my unresistlnG
ARM he dragged me through the crowd
half across the room, and presently came
to sudden halt i'll front of mss, appa
rently some fifteen years old.
Miss Cleveland, allow me to have tn,
pleasure of introducing to you Mr.. Cebe.
Good evening, Miss Cleveland" salt
, |, executing a bow with all the grace
could muster.-Of shot my evil genius
in the yellow gloves, leaving me sU,
CuitrO.
, Miss Cleveland murmcred something il
reply which | did not hear; then sh
looked down at her feet very sentimental
". and presently the little foot moved
, la Eve Ellingham. PreneS gdrde
: am getting on dangerous ground. Th
r amiable Mr.. Efiingham may prosecut
me next. WE'LL if he chooses, let hin
t bring on his bears as soon as he pleases
4 I can be heard of at any time through m.
a solicitor. ID. d. Dominus, Esq, New
4 Haven. can tell him one thing, howe
yer, before hand, he won't find me wort
D powder and shot. ! am only an hundrc
F., and twenty five dollars worse than nothing
r and live in daily fear of being compeiIe'
, to 'absquatulate,' or 'Swartwout, o
2 yvh,toya, oIsa ,ba rn,dpr may choose Il