The Illinois free trader. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1840-1841, 1841-05-07

Tobacco is an Indian weed,
And twas the devil that sowed the seed"
My indulgent and indulging hearers
of all the evil habits that have ever been
plastered upon the breast of society, that
of chewing, smoking, and snuliiing tobac-
co is ths iilthlest, the most demoralizing,
and the most inveterale. 1t was the de-
vii, beyond all question, who first sowed
the seed, and who is still the sole owner
and proprietor of all that is, or over will
be, raised, of this soul communicating We
getable. All the tobacco inspectors in
the country are his principal agents, ap-
pointed to see that the traffic is carried on
to his own especial benefit-that every
paper, package. parcel, or cask is accom-
panied with a label bearing the name of
the proprietor in his own hand writing !;
for none is genuine unless signed "Beei-
eebub Corentoot, No /, Solamander
street, Internal Regions" 1t is strange
to me that man will consent to take the
sub-agency of this disgusting narcotic,
and deal it out to his brother inan, when
he knows that it is as fatal in lis moral
effects as drop of turpeutine when ap-
lied to the back of a bed bug. care not,
my friends, how healthy the fptus of mo-
raity may be in the hearts fruitful womb,
if tobacco be taken in sufficient doses, an
abortion will certainly be produced, and
barrenness ensue. O, you vile tobacco
worms ' hardly know whether it is best
to poke you about with long stick of
rancor, or stand farther OIL and rely upon
the entlcing powers of persuasion. ex-
pect, however, to accomplish but little
any way.
My hearers-to such of you as are in
the habit of cheering, allow me to address
myself, bult-eAd foremost. If YOU don't
leave off the filthy practice shall put YOU
down upon my catalogue of unclean
beasts, to be stunned and avoided by all
decent society. 1t is a practice produc-
tive of no good whatever, and iraught
with more evils than scavenger's horse
can carry. 1t renders your carcases as
loathsome and disgusting as those of tur-
key buzzards: it stains vour dickevs rs
well as your moral haracters-blacken
both your teeth and your souls, causes an
oderitcrous stencil to flow continually
from your moulhs-and not only inluscs
a deadly poison into your blood, but leads
you on to an inclination for occasional
dissipation--lrom that to semi-occasional
intoXlcation-and thence to actual dam
natlOn.-Alan's mouth, my hearers, was
never made for tobacco bOX and
wonder how any one can have the cou-
rage to chew that which he dare not
swallow. I'd like to see a man stuff some
Of the trash into his abdominal pantry
If he didn't feel uncomfortable about the
Wristbands soon after, it would be because
sickness was afraid to come near him.
Do, dear friends, for the sake of seli-re-
spect, discard the noXious quld, and not
90 squirting your We stuff along the paths
of decency and good breeding, as though
none but such vcrmin rs YOU were accus.
toned to walk therein. Pay some regard
to the delicacy of the feminine gender.
The ladies are not to be spit upon with
impunlty, neither should the fragrance
which surrounds the flowers of their love
be contaminated with the cliluvia of ca
vendish and plug. You may have yom
boots well poIishcd-your pantaloons and
your coats cut according TO the latest IA
shion--and you may SHINE forth in all the
splendor of attire--but how can you have
the audarily--thc brazen impudence--tC
look IN the face of common neatucss, ant
proclaim yourselves gentlemen, while to
bacco juice--that unclarilied essence o
| filth--is oozing down from the corners o
your mouths into your whiskers! And
augh how eda you ever have the cruelty
TO apply your scurf covered lips to thos,
of virgin purity, or bcdaub the check O
beauty with your nasty kisses Just fan
cy, for a moment, how agreeable it woul,
be to you if your wives or your sweet
hearts were to meet your embraces witt
guilds of tobacco in their mouths as largr
as bull frogs, and with brcaths lhicl, ant
stout enough to hang pair of saddle bag
across Yes, my friends, now wouI,
you like that! Not exceedingly well,
trow. Think over this matter when yor
retire to your respective homes, if 20
have any, and resolve that your teetl
hencelorth shall not NEEDLE with III,
which levels a man with the brute, an
renders him unworthy of the static
which he occupies in the scale of bs
ing.
.SnnRing. my Giends, is nearly if nc