The Illinois free trader and LaSalle County commercial advertiser. [volume] (Ottawa, Ill.) 1841-1843, 1841-09-03


Nutmeg addressing Cracker, a Geor
gian.) | say, Mister, you haint seen no
thing Of no umbrella nowhere about here
haint you
era. Now, l tell you what, stranger
II you'll just untwst that and say it owe
agln, I'll give you an answer.
Mt. Now-do tell guass you are
about as snappish as Deacon Holmes new
invented sheep shears; they not only took
the wool clean off, but shaved the ears and
tail with it!
era. You are screamer Come, f.
CURE with me in mint julip, if you know
what's what MINIS all the 90 South
and if you want 10 git the first chop, GO
TO the grave Of any southern nullifer, who
mought have recently died, and there you
II find the mint, as they say, shooting
up spontaneously.
Mt. No, you don't say so! Well
now, that's a good one. Howsomdever,
Mister, | guess YOU never drinked no
black-Strapp, did you! Spose you hav'nt.
Why, bless your tarnal soul, it's the
sweetest drink that ever streaked it down
common sized gullet. 'Lasses and rum,
with little dash o water-why, do you
know, when Deacon Shocks died he was
buried in farmer Greg's old lot, just be-
hind Major Stape's grocery and liquor
store you know where it is! Well,
ever since he was laid there, which may
be, guess, about twelve years ago, there
S been spring of black-strap running.
era. Well, stranger, you can take the
rag of, the bush about a lcete the clean
est ever heard tell. Ireckon you'll beat
our old niger Coot, who once run again
lawyer, and has never been able TO tell
the truth since. You can come buckle
berry over my priscimmon to-day.
MT. Well, guess am not quite as
slow as pumpkin-vine or as dull as raj
ny day. But you appear TO be green
'un in these parts--how do you like the
mddlings of Maryland ,
era. Why, ! can't 'zactly say,-lre
on your nIggers are about a notch too IN
dependish--why, it's fact, the vile cata-
mounts are so plaugy slow on their trot-
ter when Teller speaks TO 'em, that they
might run a race with gourd and then be
dstanced after all. ] reckon you had
ought TO sec our Georgy nggers-they re
l,,l,, ,L,n tho sbart, anI nI
thing whitfield down, if they can't dodge
a panther at three months old. | once
seed a niger strlck it up the Savannah ri
yer again stream and wind, middle deep
in the water at the rate Of ten miles an
hour if did not, may | be screw d down
to a hoe-cakc in a cider press.
MT. Well now--do tell; you must
have a handsome climate in Georgy.
Crack. tell YOU what, stranger, our
climates got no nature at all. In the up
lands it mought be the same as this ere
one day, and another just about hot enough
to roast common sized salamandcr
Some folks there cant count their chill
drcn, and don't die until they're so partl-
cularly old that they cant step into their
coffin. But | reckon you've never been
in the low countries (! The fog there is
so thick that You have to cut your way
through it with pick axe. A steamboat
was once smashed to pieces by running
agin a Georgy fog.
MT. | swow Mister, should like
to know what school you got your chll-
dren in =! May be you were brought up
in neutrality-suspicious. fed on razors.
guess if you were put into a cider
mill you'd come out a regular built cholc-
IA morbus.
era. Right, stranger-and you have to
pass through all the cotton gins in Georgy
afore you'd come out an honest man,
Howsomcvcr, you're a scrcamcr, so gin
us shake of your corn-stca,crs, and lets
paddle canoes together.