The Illinois free trader. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1840-1841, 1840-12-18

rage only by his fierce looks. Then,
setting his arms akimbo, he said, "You
arc cowardly pcdagogue TO attack boys
in that contemplate way. never knew
a pedagoguc who was not a tyrant among
children and Internal coward
among men," He interlnied this speech
with one of the oaths commonly used by
DULLES and blackguards adding those
words IL had pedagogue in my bat
tallion during the campaign of 80 against
the Indians, and the - rascal ran away
in every battle, till had him drummcd
out of the army, the - poltroon."
"You said the campaign of 90: are
you not mistaken in the date ~ asked
Bateman, with good gravity.
Eyes, sir pcdagogue said the camp
align Of 90 under Wayne. mistake no
dates, sir; and if did, your pedagogical
pusillanimity disqualifes you for the func-
ton Of historical correction"
"Wayne's expedition against the lndi-
ans was over, and peace was made be-
fore &c." said Bateman dryly, as he sat
nearly opposite to Bickerton, stirring a
copious mixture of butter, molasses and
mush, or hasty pudding, which were to
be his supper.
"You are - liar, YOU - peda-
gogue," roared out the bully; "what the
- do you know of Wayne's camp
aigns =! talk about your (erulc and your
spellngbook, and leave military affairs to
gentlemen they are exterior to your
province, sir pedagogue.'
"Boys learn history in these days"
said Bateman, as lie rose from the table,
and took down volume from the mantel-
piece. After turning over n few leaves,
he resumed his seat, and said, "Here is
an epitome of American history brought
down to the year 1891" He then read
a short paragraph which confirmed his
assertion: then holding the book towards
Bickerton, he said dryly, "that is what
my boys learn, sir. Would YOU like to
see it in the book, major ~
"No, you are a - fool and an inso-
lent liar, tell YOU
Zone mark of fool" said Batoman,
as dryly as ever, sis TO fly into passion
and call names about a trlile; and one
mark Of liar is, to persevere in false
assertion in the face of evidence to the
contrary
The yankee had no sooner spoken
these words, stirring his mush all the
while, than the enraged bully lifted the
case knife in his hand and flung it violent
Iy at Batcman's head. The yankee,
though seemingly intent upon his mush,
which he had now thoroughly imbued
with the molasses and butter, kept watch
however with a corner of his eye and
lodged the knife as it flew whizzing tow
ards his head. At the same time, drop
ping the spoon, he slipped his pslm UNI
der the plate and adroitly dashed it, mush
foremost, plump into the duellists face.
The centre Of the reoking mass struck
the nose, which operating as wedge,
caused the clammy supper of the yankee
TO spread itself with accommodating faci-
lity over the whole fiery visage of the
duellist, and TO stop up every hole and fiji
up every hollow in the said visagc---thc
eyes and ears not excepted. A consider
able quantity too became entangled in the
huge bushy whiskcrs; the superiority
gliding down with the plate made a lodg-
ment in the bosom and manifold convolu-
tons of the frll that stuck out prominent
| ly in front. Happily for the duellist, the
operation of mixing and compromising
the plaster had 50 reduced its tempera-
lure that it was not quite scaldlng hot,
and the cyelids had inslinctively closed
themselves on the approach of the slap
dashing application, or those lately glar
ing eye-bals would never again have d.
rected a pistol-ball at the heart of al
adversary.
lie was led by the hand into the back
porch, where, after fifteen minutes wash
ing, the orifces and cavities of his face
were cleared Of the adhesive mixture, ant
he was able again to see, hear, smell anc
speak.
When he found his organs free, though
his nose still wept blood from the rud
contact of the heavy pewter plate, he be
gan TO roar out torrent of oaths, impre
) cations and threats against the yankee
: who had begun to feed his hunger upo
a second plate of hasty pudding, as if no
thing had happened. In spite of the CT
treaties of the company, the raying bull
started up stairs for his pistols, swearin