The Columbia Democrat. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1837-1850, 1840-07-25
"Well, let's try again ~

NOW, Mr. Jonas beagle was man VINO
prided himself especially upon the evenness
Of his temper. His boast was that nothing
could put him IN a passion, and If he had
less than most Of his CO temporaries 10 vex
him, he had certainly been able, in the ab-
sence of all cause for irritation, 10 preserve
his equanimity. AS perfect natural mat
ter, of course, he invariably attributed the
absence Of such cause to the innate smia-
biity Of his Disposition; and marveled that
men, men of sense and dscernment, should
so far forget what was justly expected of
them, as reasonable beings,as to suffer them
selves TO be tortured by excitement, mas
much albeit as human nature and difficult
ties are are Inseparable, human nature is
sufficiently potent not only to battle with
those difficulties, but overcome them, If
Mr., Jonas Beagle had to contend against
many OF the ills flesh and blood is heir, 10
he, in all probability, would have acted like
the majority of his fellow men; but as he
had met with very few, and those few had
not been of very furious complexion, he
could afford to be deeply philosophical on
the subject, and felt himself competent, Of
course, to frame laws by which the tenn
pers of men in the aggregate should be 60
verned, He did, however, feel when he
violently smoie the pillow, that the little eb-
ulition partook somewhat Of the nature of
passion, and just commenced reproaching
himself fer having indulged IN that little eb-
ulilion, when Valentine cried, "meyow J.
pit!-meyow p
"Halo," exclaimed Mr.. Jonas Beagle
there again!'
"Mew y said yAlefiine,'in somewhat
higher key.
"Whai! another come to contribute to the
harmony Of the evening !"
"Meyow-meyow - cried Valentine a
key still higher.
"Well, how many more of you :" en-
quired Mr.. Beagle, "you will be able to gel
up concert by and-bye; and Valentine be.
gan to spit and swear with great felicity.
"Swear away you Beauties" cried Nh
Jonas Beagle, as he listened to this voiley
Of feline oaths; 81 only wish that was moi
so much afraid of you for your sakes. a
it again !--Well, this is blessing. Don't
you hear these devils of cats?" he cried
anxious not to have all the fun 10 himself;
but Valentine recommended snoring very
loudly, "'Nell, this is particularly pleas
ant" he continued, as he sat up in bed
Don't you hear! What comfort it is tc
be able TO sleep soundly;" which remarka
bic observation was doubtless provoked by
the no less remarkable fact that the splitting
and swearing became more and more despe'
r rate, "What's to be done 2" he enquirsc
very pointedly. Whats to be done" my
breeches are right in the midst of them all
can't get out now--they'd tear the ilesf
off my legs; and that fellow there sleeps
like a top. Halo do you mean TO say
you don't hear those cats, how theyrt
going it?" Valentine certainly mean
to say no such thing, for the whole
of the time that he was not engaged in me
yowing and splitting, ho was diligently oc
cupied in snoring-which had very gooC
effect, and served to fll up the intervals ex
ceedingly well.
At length the patience of Mr.. Jonas Bea
gle began 10 evaporale, for the hostile ami
mails continued to battle apparently viii
great desperation; he therefore threw pill
low with crest violence into the BED of hit
companion, and shouted so loudly that Val
entine, finding that it would be perfect non
sense TO pretend to sleep any longer, begar
to yawn very naturally, and then 10 cry Ou
"who's there %
"Tls /, " shouted Jonas Beagle. "Don
you hear those witches OF cats y
"IIist," cried Valentine, "why there are
two Of them !"
"Two!" said Mr.. Beagle, "more like
two-and-twenty ! I've turned out dozer
myselE There's swarm, whole colony