Maumee City express. [volume] (Maumee City, Ohio) 1838-184?, 1840-03-28
LovB.--Hear how Philadelphia swain
pokes love at bis flame through the columns

Were we in the young girls place we
would get the word mo-. engraved ON o
sweet potatoe, do it up with his verses, and
send it to him as a final answer. - PIC. ~
The ludicrous activity Of the acduisitiye
spirit of our countrymen, is thus illustra
ted in London farce. A Yankee lands al
Portsmouth, and an English lady who un-
derstands that he has been an invalid, ask.
eG himi ifhe has been benefited by the voy-
age. Benefitedr he exclaimed; no, not
at all; havnt made dollar by IT,
A countryman being at law, earnestly re-
quested his attorney to bring on hlstrlal; but
the.etter who saw no money stirring, al
ways told his client, My friend, your af-
fair is so intricate that cannot see through
It, The.countryman understood at length
what all this meant, and pulling out of his
pocket two crown pieces, offered them %
the attorney, saying, Well, sir, here are a
pair of spectacles for you. ,t
" Tuck in your rufle.--Tt would be no
bad notion in these hard times, for many a
young man to tuck in his rgH es, and swing
an axe, or hold plough, or make shoe:
for many young man whose expectation
of riches from an uncertain source, is sadly
disappointed, to earn a living in some call
ing the world honors less but pays better
some humble occupation, which, while it
holdso ur no deiusive hope of Immense wealth
by single stroke, assures him Of compe-
tent food and raiment. - Hornet.
WHAT won'T AN APPETITE FOR Rum
LEAD MAN TO Dol--Mr.--, Of p
---t, NJ. related to us the following cir
cumstance, which he personally knew to be
a fact. J----H---of that townj not
long since, lost child. The friend who
prepared it for burial, placed over the lids
of each of its eyes a ten cent piece.
These two pieces; ca you believe it read
der? were pilfered by the wreched father
from the eyes of the little corps, and expen-
ded at grocery for RUM.--M Tenn.
Herald.
We we're not little amused, a few days
since, whilst travelling in Illinois in COM
pany with young "sucker," who had new
er visited st. Louis, or perhaps never been
out of sight of home until then. On COM
ing in full view of the city, he rose up in
the wagon and exclaimed in apparent as
tonlshment, "Dad, are them all houses"
-" Yes" was dads reply. "And do folks
live in all them hous,s?' +" Yes" "Thun-
der and lightning, what heap of pork it
must take to feed em ALL" tt
lnhuman BarJaray.-It is stated in a
Baltimore paper, that woman was arrest
ted on one of the cold nights last week for
.hree bllets of wood to make fire
to keep her three children from freezlng.--
When taken to the watch-house, she beg
yed most earnestly, to be allowed to go to
Them, or have them brought to her, as they
would freeze to death. Her request was
refused, and in the morning the children
were found frozen to death. Jour.
Cool REcRPTIoN.--Only one attempt
has been made in the U. S. House of Rep
since the adoption of the Rule,
to present an abolition petition on memori-
al, 1t was made on Friday by Mr.. Weller.
He offered two. A page took them to the
Clerk, the Clerk took them TO the Speaker.
The Speaker looked at them and handed
them sack TO the Clerk--rbe Clerk handed
them back to the page, and the page handed
them back to Mr.. Weller, who put them
into his desk, perfectly satisfied that the
House, as thesnew rule says, would not en-
tertain them in any way whatever"
MAIL RoBBERy.-The mail coach from
he west to Columbus was, at 1s o'clock
last night, stopped by two men about two
miles on this side of Springfield. There
was no other person with the coach but the
driver. One ofthe robbers put pistol to
his breast and forced him to halt his team,
while the other broke open the coach and
the Cincinnati letter bag. This
was the only bag taken. As soon as the
driver was at liberty he put his horses to
their full speed, and gave the alarm at his
first stopping place. A dllligent search,
we understand, was Immediately commen-
ced in the neighborhood.- 20. S. Jour.
The exact profits, after paying all con-
tingent expenses arising from the Office of
Inspector Of Pearl and Pot Ashes in The
city If New York, for the past year, are
said to have amounted to the snug little sum
Of $1o,15O! Well not more than double
that by publishing the barometer this year.
Defiance Bar
A STANDING ARmY-The Secretary of
War has made proposition for raising an
lrmy of 200, 900 men, one half to be in ac-
Lual service and under pay, at all times.
There was time when the old Federal |
sts were driven out Of power because of
their fondness for a standing army. Their
tho Van Rnron pon saonn 4 : n |