The Camden journal. [volume] (Camden, S.C.) 1836-1851, 1840-08-29
Miscellaneous.
From the Temperance Advocate.
A CHAPTER ON BED BUGS.
md conscious nature shSddered at the"

~'SS'
Bed Bugs are standing and inexhaus-
tible, topic in the periodical literature of
our country. Like the Florida war,
all sorts of schemes are Iied to expel these
Red Skins from their crannies and cracks,
but all in vain: Every now and then we
see a flaming article in some newspaper,
that the war is ended. Doctor somebo-
dys celebrated Bed Bug poison has utter
ly exterminated the. whole blood thirsty
tribe in every house in which it has been
tried. All the rest Of us take it up and it
goes the rounds: the good old ladies throw
down their knitting work and try the Eek
pertinent" and ,chuckle over fancied victo-
ry-the whole family retire to rest and
cannot sleep for the delight of thinking
what fine sleep they shall have, until at
last when through pure exhaustion from
the anticipated bliss, they are just falling
into dreamy Inconsistencies, forth march
es some sturdy Sam Jones or TEger-tait of
a Bed Bug, with a scoreof hungry wretch
es at his heels, right out Of the Doctors
celebrated compound, and falling. upon
their unconscious vietims,- they drive sleep
from their eyes and Joy from their hearts.
Our good old grandmothers, peace be to
their ashes, tried hot-scalding water and
endeavored to burn, the fellows into SUBJ
mission, but they went down to their
graves under the full consciousness that
the war was not ended, leaving as dy-
ing INDUCTION to their daughters to "scald
the bed-steads." And our mpthers with
commendable reverence for the maxims
of antiquity and praiseworthy zeal did
scald the bed-steads, until a cunning Yam
kee rose and promulged a new system of
operations against the enemy, uidelecit,
light steamers, to navigate the little inlets
and thus carry the war into the very heart
|! of the encmy's hiding places. He declar-
ed the old hot water system hatched the
eggs and multiplied bugs instead of des-
troying. Soon. there came a little yellow
and red painted pedler wagon into the lit
tie town we lived in, with lots Of little tin
Bed Bug steamers, with sharp noses to run
into all sorts of cracks and crevices. The
ladies were delighted, for, said they. it
stands to reason that Bed Bug cannot out
wit Yankee, and again it was proclaim
ed "The war is ended" the newspapers
echoed and re-echoed the cry "the war is
ended" and the little tin steamers were
heard putting and wheeling in every house
and around every bed-stead, and the poor
Bugs began to conclude it was useless to
hold out any longer, that they were caught
this time, and good many gave up and
consented to- eemigrate. But at length
they discovered that the little tin steamers
were not SO formidable as they thought,
and headed by some formidable Uchee
Billy, they again sailed forth to the great
annoyance of the house-keepers:
By this time Brussais' anti-calomel sys-
tenn began to get into disrepute among
the Doctors, and some one again proclaim
ed that he could end the war by<Mercury.
Again the house keepers were thrown in
to ecstacies, and they did succeed in sail
waiting a few Bugs who perhaps impru-
dently drank cold water after being dosed,
but it is thought large number were cur
ed of liver complaints by course of mer-
curry, and that this system did not dimin-
ish their number much. Since then DR.:
Miles has discovered that the Extract of
Tomato" is good substitute for Calomel
for the human race, and the Bed Bug doc.
tors by very ingenious process of reason
ing have discovered, that what will cure a
man will kill Bed Bug, and for some etime
past it has been proclaimed from Maine to
N. Orleans, that if you will anoint your bed
steads with the juice Of the 1onaato-vine,
the war will come to close, and the Red
Skins will emigrate; but until the Florida
war is ended, we shall lie down every
night under the expectation of losing blood
and of seeing some fat Micanopy rendered
"hors du combat" by his gluttony, wad-
ding slowly off every morning to his
h iding place with his booty.
We subioin very comforting view Of
the prospects of posterity in this matter,
taken from the Southern Banner.
."Bed Bugs.-The following fact in Ma
tural history from the New York Sun, is
worthy the attention of all who wish to
study cleanliness and comfort. This dis
gusting and very annoying insect, the bed
bug, is one of the most prolific in existence.