Rutland herald. [volume] (Rutland, Vt.) 1823-1847, 1840-05-26

cion as habit OF mind but ] would have
you make II rule never to pledge yourself to
any intimacy. until you have taken time 10 re-
consider your first impressions and 10 disiin-
gu'sh between the charm that really belongs
10 q new acquaintance and that which was
thrown over your first interview by accidental
circumstances and associations. Surprising
now that your acquaintance were well chos-
en- and YOUR intimate friends ara worthy Of
your confidence, what are the mistakes that
you arc most likely 10 commit in this relaiion'
Inadvertently skpesnyiaG sshs seesSts q onc'
friend to another Is cruel injury and fruit
ful source Of difficulty. Do not suffer your
self to be easily bound to secrecy, for keeping
n secret is very troublesome and disagreed
BILE thing; but when you are thus pledged, be
scrupulously faithful. Many girls have a silly
way Of making secret Of something OF no
consequence whatever, and Of telling it to
each Of their friends separately, and enjoining
secrecy upon each. When you have been
taken in once in this way, IL Is your own fault
, if you allow it a second time.
Never encourage your young friends 10 tell
their family secrets; il they are indiscreet O.
nough to wish to do il, YOU should repress
their confidence. Never invite them by d.
rect or indirect questions to tell you of the
matrimonial overtures which they may have
received; respect their secrets and love your
IfisUu tic DtttcT IDr net fcSefNe upon u point
Of such delicacy and one in which the feel
ings of another are so deeply concerned. If
you have been privy to any such affair, keep
the secret strictly, and let no impertinent qucs-
'ionings reveal II. Make it a rule to have no.
thing to do with any love affair that Is carried
on without the knowledge and consent of pa
rents. IL you have inadvertently tecome
I conhdant at the beginning Of any such affair,
use all your influence to induce your friend to
/ break II off, or to open her mind to her natu-
raj protectors; IL you cannot prevail upon her
TO do this, refuse any further confidence on the
subject, and warn her In the most friendly way
of her danger In some cases you would do
right to inform her friends yourself of such a
clandes,ine affair, having previously given her
notice that you intended to do IT,
There is generally something wrong where
much secrecy is in the affairs of the young
II your aims are high and your life is one of
useful and honorable action. If you love mem
tai cultivation, and live much In the com ,any
of great spirits Of all ages, you will be lifted
above the petty interests Of gossiping girls |;
you will not care to know how much Miss
such-a-one gave FIR her bonnet, nor that Mr..
A thinks Miss b told something to his disad-
vantage which broke off his match; nor any
of the thousand things, as trifiing as these.
which are made the theme Of so much whis-
pering among young ladies'.
One Of the great uses of reading Is, that it
furnishes you with interesting and safe topics
of conversation with your young friends. To
live with books is to inhabt region far above
the din and turmoil and petty vexatons which
unnecessarily engross the minds of some who
pretend to cultivation: and YOU cannot turn
your advantages of education IN better account
than by induring your female friends to read
with you, and to exchange the frivolous COS
nj far
spirits of the dead
= 1t is very difficult and requires all the wis
dom Of the serpent and harmlessacss of the
dove TO talk of people without violating the
laws of charity or of truth; il is, there fore
best to avoid it. By substituting books, anc
the vast variety of characters and opinion,
which they present, you give yourself anc
: companions ample scope for the expression o
your thoughts and feelings, for the discussion
, of various questions, for sharpening each 9th
crs' wits by collision of sentiment, correctin;
the Judgment by comparison and discrimina
ton, and sirengtheningt the memory by rcpeti
; ton and quotation.
Stated meetings FOR reading are useful to Fl,
the attention and induce habi, Of mental cul
tivation, where culture Is wanting but whcr
il exists. solitary reading turns to the best ac
count, especially if you have intelligeD
friend with whom to talk over the ideas yo'
. have JUS, acquired. Those who are begin
ming to educate themselves by the study O
; standard authors, and form reading socieiie
: for that purpose, would do well to seek som
! more cultivated person to preside over thei
u meetings, and TO rouse their minds to actio
" Ivy dscoursing with them of what they read
" Much good might be done to girls who hlv
;, LEFT school, IL they would form classes and &c
y highly cultivated persons TO read the English
y French, and Italian classics with them, point
% ing out the peculiar merits OF each author an
e lecturing upon them as they went along.
d have heard Of reading parties anon
:, young ladies' where they met TO run throue
u the pages Of fashionable novel or moder
Y poem, and, without having gained one ide
y from it worth preserving, finish the evening
gossip or filtration. or perhaps dance. Sue
d are no, the reading parties that would re
' commend and yet the perusll OF any NOR;
n work is better than great deal OF talk abol
u nothing; and dancing is far better than gos
y siping bot when reading party might u
y made a high intellectual treat, without an
~ such accomplishments, 1t Is sad TO see sue
!" opportunities wasted.
v When you receive your young friends
N your own house, you should consider yourse
n responsible for the direction which the col
u yersliion takes and if i, is becoming uncha
~ table or Improbable, you should feel bour
TO give il safer and better impulse. The u
= ,roduction Of beautiful annual, or por,-foi
Is of prints and rawlings, will ohen answer Il
'e purpose and the fashion Of sirewing oentr
ne liable, with books and cneravngs has a NOR
D. use which makes il very valuable. ha'
seen The breath Of scandal stopped and an U