Burlington free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1827-1865, 1840-12-18
NEW WAY TO "sOrT SANDER"
NY SAM SLICK.


So now, when | enter a location, arter a
little talk about this, or the other, looks at
one Of the young grow'dup gals alrnest like,
till she says, Mr.. Slick, what on airth arc
you a-lookin' att Nothln, says I, my dear,
but most remarkable development. A
what, says she. A remarkable development,
says I, the most remarkable, too, ever
seen since was raised. Why, what in Ma
tur's that ? says she. Excuse me, Miss,
says I, and l gets up, and puts my finger on
her crown. What benevolence says I, and
frmncss of character did you ever land
then, says /, a-passin' my finger over her
eyebrown, you ought to sing well positively ;
and l am sure it 5 your own fault if you
don't, foryo have uncommon petikilar pow
crs that way. Your time is large, and tune
great; yes, and compositions is strong. Well,
how strange says she you haze guessed
right, l swan, for do sing, and am allow
ed TO have the best ear for music in all these
clearin's. How on airth can You tell =? II
that don't pass! Tell, says I, why, it's what
they call phrenology, and most beautiful
study it is. can read head as plain as a
book and this will say, finer head than
yourn never did see positively. What a
splendid forehead you have! it's sight TO
behold. Ifyou was to take pains you could
do any thing almost. Would you like to
have it read, Miss? Well, arter hearin' me
pronounce afore hand at that rate, he is sure
to want it read, and then say won't read
it aloud, Miss; III whisper il into yonr ear,
and you shall say if am right. Do, says
she I should like to see what mistakes
you'll make, for I can't believe it possible
you can tell it don't convene to reason,
does 1t a! Nothin', squire, never stops wo-
man when her curiosity is once up, especially
if she be curious to know something abou,
herself. Only hold secret ont in your
hand to her, and it's like bunch of catn,p
to cat; she'll jump, and frisk, and frolic
round you like any thing, and never give
over purrin' and coaxn' of you till she gets
it. They'll do any thing for you Almost for
it. So slides out my knee for a seat, and
says. it's no harm Miss, you know, for Ma
is here, and must look near to tell you; Sc
draws heron my knee, without waiting for
an answer. Then gradually one arm goes
round the wayst, and t'othcr hand goes to
the head, thumpologizin', and Whispers
wit, paintin', judgment, fancy, order, music
and every good thing almost. And she
keeps sying'-Well, he's witch Well
| want to know now never do tell
as pleased all the time as anything, Lord
squire, you never see any thing like it: it's
Jerusalem fine fun. Well, then, Iwnd uT
by touching the back Of her head hard, (yol
know, squire, what they call the amative
bumps are located there,) and, then wills.
pears bit Of a joke toher about her maxim
a very lovin' wife, and so on, and she Jump.
up colorin', and a'sayin' its no such athing
You missed that guess anyhow. Take tha
for not guessin better! and pretending to SLAP
ME, and all that: but actilly ready to jumI
over the moon for delight. Don't my clocks
get fust admired and boughten after ,hi
rnah;e' "r.h"~1~ .k,''- IVA Mn pun a cIotl
into their heads when you are putin otI,e
hne things in, too, as easy as kiss nv hand
l have sold nation lot Of them by il.