Southport telegraph. [volume] (Southport, W.T. [i.e. Kenosha, Wis.]) 1840-1850, 1840-08-25

From the AdUeatures Of Valentine Voc.
\ VcntrilOquist treating his Friends to a
Serenade of cats.
There happened TO be only four bed
rooms in the house; the best Of course was
occupied by Miss Madonna, the second by
PIumpee, the third by Mr. Beagle, and the
fourth by the servant; and that in which
Mr.. Beagle slept was q double bedroom,
and Valentine had, therefore, to make his
selection between the spare bed and the
sofa. OF course the former was prefer
rcd, and as this preference seemed highly
satisfactory to Mr.. Beagle himself, they pas
sod the evening very pleasantly together,
and in due time retired.
Valentine, on having the bed pointed out
to him, dartcd between the sheets in the
space Of minute, for rs Mr.. Jonas Bca-
gle lacctiously observed, he had but to
shake himself, and every thing came off :,
when as he did not by any means feel
drowsy at the time, he lancicd that he
might as we'll amuse his companion for an
hour or 50 as not. He therefore, turned
the thing seriously over in his mind, while
Mr.. Beagle was quietly undressing, being
anxious for that gentleman to extinguish
the light before he commenced operations.
"Now for a beautiful nights rest" OBJ
served Mr.. Jonas Beagle TO himself as he
put out the light with tranquil mind, and
turned in with a great deal Of comfort.
New !-mcw' cried Valentine, softly,
throwing his voice under the bed of Mr..
Beagle.
"uiah---cursc that catt' cried Mr. Bea-
gle, "wc must have you out at all events,
my lady" And Mr.. Beagle at once slip
ped out Of bed, and having opened the
door cried ''hlsh!" again emphaticaIy,
and threw his brceches toward the spot as
an additional inducemcnt for the cat TO
" stand not on the order of her going"
when Mr.. Valentine repeated the cry, and
made 1t appear to proceed from the stairs.
Mr. Beagle thanked heaven she was gone,
closed the door, and very carefully CROPPED
his way again into bed.
"Mcw!-mow! mew!" cried Valentine,
just as Mr.. Beagle had again comfortably
composed himself.
"What? are you there still madam ?"
cnquircd that gentleman in d highly sar-
castle tone, 81 thought you had been turn
ed out madam. DO you hear this witch of
Il cat!" continued he, addressing Valentine
with the view of comforting upon him the
honorable Office Of Tyler for the time be-
ing; but Valentine replied with u deep
heavy snoro, and began to NEW again with
additional emphasis.
''Wcll don't have treat every day, it
is true; but if this isn't one, why Pm out
OF my reckoning that's ALL" observed Mr..
Jonas Beagle, slipping again out of bed,
Il don't much like to handle you my lady,
but it did, I'D Of course give you physicn'
and he "hshed ~ again with consumate
violence and continued to "hish !" until
Valentine scratched the bed-post sharply,
feat which inspired Mr.. Beagle with the
conviction Of its being the disturbcr of his
peace in the act of dccamping, when he
threw the pillow very oncrgcticalIy towards
the door, which he closed, and then rctur-
ned to his bed in triumph. The moment,
however, he had comfortably tucked him
self up he missed the pillow he had con-
vertcd into an instrument of vengeance,
aud as that was an article without which
nc could not even hope TO go TO sleep, he
had OF course to turn out again to fetch it.
"llow many moro times, WONDER" he
observed to himself, shall have to get
out of this blessed bed tonight Exercise
is certainly a comfort, and very conducive
10 health; but such exercise as this WHY
where have you got!' be aided, address
sing the pillow, which with all the sweep
ing action of his feet he was some timc
unable to fnd-"Oh, there Won arc sir
arc you?" and he picked IN the obiect Of
his search and gave it several severe blows
IN the belly; when having rcinstatcd him
self between the sheets, he exclaimed in a
subducd tone, "Well let's try again!2
Now, Mr.. Jonas Beagle was man who
prlded himself especially upon the even
ness Of his temper. His boast was that
nothing could put him in a passion, and
as he had less than most of his cotempo-
rarlcs to veX him, he had certainly been
able, IN the absence Of all cause for irri-
'auon' 10 preserve his equanimity. AS
perfectly natural matter, of course, he in
Var2b.T attributed the absence OF such
cause 20 The innate amiohlitv ot his dis