The Hawk-eye and Iowa patriot. (Burlington, Iowa) 1839-1843, 1840-03-26

expense o. the laOOrlng classes!
Senator. Oh, no They are a high.
minded race of men, who would not do
any thing for themselves.
Laborer. But they always stick nigh
ty close to their Offices.
Senator. Yes--but they are for their
principles and their party.
Laborer. Their principles and their
party, you must confess, always lie along
the road with their own interests.
Senator. That may be, but it is mere
ly accidental.
Laborer. It may be SO, Mr.. Senator,
but still | cant exactly see why all the in
ciden,al benefits should go to the office
holders, and all the natural consequences,
as you call them, should Operate to de-
press labor anddiscourage industry. Good
morning, Mr.. Senator. when have time
| will call and converse further with you.
HuMoRous.-The following laughable
police report we take from the Brother
Jonathan Of the 9th ult. We embrace
this opportunity Of saying that the N.
York Brother Jonathan is the largest,
cheapest and most interesting Newspa-
paper published in the City Of New
York. The editors have thus far ex-
hibited great tact in their selections, great
talent in their editorials ard great indus
try in getting up such an interesting and
enormous sheet from week to week. It
occasionally issues an Extra, but as we
do not receive these often we are unable
to speak of their merits.
Frederick Van Sickler charged Brian
Fagin. with picking his pocket, and
Frederick appeared like man who Nigh.
have pocket to pick and Brian Just
1.-The sort of chap who would mt have ex.
|perienced many qualms of conscience in
easing it for him. Frederick told the
story of his woes something as follows,
but we will not pledge ourselves for the
proper photography of his Dutch lingo
Z" wash Walking up de sthreet, an
down de sthreet, schmokin my pipe, an
tinkn vat wish de raishin dat bishnessh
wash SO dam bad, ven horsh nit vagin
came running along like so as if ten tou-
sand tells wash alder him tail. Vell on
him vent-crack -crack--crack-till he
came to de lampbost, ven down he vent
on his pelly, nit his feet on de top Of
hish back. Den de lefl wash TO pay,
every Won saying do fish ting an do dat
ling, an no pody doing noting at all, but
swear an go gable, gabble, gable, like
ash so many ducks round tead toy in a
,yke Of vater.-Vell, dere We s,hood look
| ing on, an de horsh looking at us as if he
wash ,inkin' We wash all de same ash
Won pack of fools. Ven vat should see
but de feel dat dere wash something like
ash mans han all de way down in dc
potion Of my preeches booklet. Dundel
an tetil, vot for ish dat, say !, an | pu
mine two hans to mine face, TO shee vasl
it none Of dem vot wash goin' into mine
booklet by mishdake but ven mine tw,
hans wash before mine two eyesh, der,
wash de oder down in mine preeches, al
den shaw plainly vot wash de matter
so grab hold of de arm quicker as Vol
flash of lightning jumps out Of de dunde
cloud, an cry lief, tief, tief, nit all dt
dongues in mine head.''
]" And did you lose any thing y en-
quired the court.
s. lsh myneer, lozh mine booklet pool
nit mine mowneysh in it; an mine do
bacco pox an de very preeches from
mine pack vosh daken, an sleepin mi
dem undare mine head.''
:. That may be- observed the court
! shut you couldn't have lost your breeche'
when you were looking a, the affair o
the horse and wagon.
0, no, myneer, dat ish de nod de
time ven lozh mine brooches; or min,
, booklet pook, nit mine lnowneysh in it
! or mine tobacco pox, ash wrought from
Schmarkdam.
:" Well, but want to know what Thu
man stole from you :" observed his wor
; ship.
Dat ish vot say he sdole noting, 70
ven l say tief, tief, tief, he drop min'
mowneysh, he say make mishdake, al
put my han in dish mans booklet, insteae
ov mine own
g Well, Mr. Fagin, this is prett,
charge that's brough, against YOU re
+. marked the Court, with an interesting in
: clination Of his legal upper story in ia
vor of the till then passive Irishman.
!" Purify enough, God bless it, you
: honor" returned FagiD, brushing up
8. but shure i have wan comfort at an,
> rate-,he divil word ov it, you believe.
Why, you can. deny having your han
! in the mans pocket, when lie caught
there.
In coorse can't, but blurinages, ism
it as plain as day that ! thought it was m
own till | found the money in it, whic
al vance showed it was ill mistake.
You were here before for two or lhre
. mistakes Of similar nature.
Well. but you know, your honor
thin wor all honorably settled; an be III
!, breed ov the Kinshela: which is til
S hardest oath / should venture to take, a
! it so near lint-I've towld you the Who'll
d truth in this mattLer. You see whin
n KEN up, there was the horse and tn
: wagin all oy haip, and the poor bais
Il + II 1