Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1839-03-29
A RIDE.

During the Revolutionary War when
corps Of the American army were encamp.
ed near The borough OF Elizubelhtown in
New Jersey-an officer who was rather
more OF devotee Of Venus, than OF Mars,
paid his addresses to lady of distinction,
whom he was in the habit OF visiting night
" ia the cultivation OF those kind feelings
which love so cordially inspires. On dis
covery OF the cause of the repeated absence
of the officer, and Of the place where his in
tervews with his dulcinea where had. some
waggish friends resolved to play oifa hand
some trick at his expense. which should de-
ter him from repetition OF his amorous
visit The officer, it appears rode a very
small horse Of the pony kind, which he al
ways left united, with the bride reins over
bis neck near the door in order to mount
and ride off without delay when the bust
ness Of counting and kissing were over and
the horse always remained until backed by
the owner. without attempting to change
his position. On Il certain very dark night
when the o.sicer had as usual. gone TO pay
bis dcvoirs TO the object OF his affections, and
was enjoying the approving smiles OF the
fair one. his waggish companions went pri-
vately 10 the door Of the house where the Of
| fcer was, took the bride and saddle from
the horse, which they sent quietly away,
placed the former on the tail, aud the latter
! on the back oil verv sober rumatise old
COW, (uilh the cruper over the horDs,) who
stood peaceably chewing her cud, near the
| spot Immediately thereafter they retired
some distance from the house & separating
they raised loud cry OF alarm, that he enc,
my had landed, and were marching in full
force into the village On hearing the voice
of alarm the people ran out greatly excited ;
and CONSERVATION entering every dwelling,
found its unwelcome way speedily into the
household temple where our official hero
was worshipping. Taking counsel from
his fears. and suutching hasly kiss, he star
ted from the lady's chamber, and rushing
down stairs shot out doors with the velocity
Of musket ball, and owing 10 the darkness
moi seeing the Interesting change in the con-
formation of his nag, mounted hastily on the
saddle. with his back towards the head Of the
COW, and plungng his spurs deeply into her
side caused her TO bawl out with excessive
pain, and she started off in galanl style and
in her best gallop made towards the camp
The officer sill plying his spurs and whip
I 10 the shin and bones of the suffering old an.
ima. and with all his wine and love on
board--finding himself hurried rapidly
backwards maugreail his efforts TO advance
:. and hearing the repeated Rawlings ofthe tor.
tured and frightened beast, imagined that
he was carried OF by magic and roaring
out most Justify that The devil had got him
was carried in this state of perturbation in
TO the very alignment of the camp. The
ha M.
imagining that Hannibal and his oxen we're
coming, iscbarged their pieces and He'd a:
if the devil chased them the alarm gun;
were fired THE drums beat TO arms; tht
officers left their quarters and cried turr
out turn out with all the strength OF thell
lungs. The soldiers started from ihei
sleep as if ghost had crossed their dream'
and the whole body running half naked
together formed in gallant dishabille, prepar
, ed TO repel the terrible invader. When 10
the ludicrous sight soon presented itself t
the eyes OF the gallant officer mounted OF
, an old COW, with his face towards her tai
r and this appendage sticking straigh, out be
| hind ;1her tongue hanging oui--her side
: gory--with the griyous giggingofthe spurs
I. and himself owing TO his excessive fear. al
most deprived of reason, and half petrifies
with horror, A loud and general roar 0
laughter broke from the assembled band, a
The rider and his steed-lhe whole corp
gave him three times three hearty cheers
/, as he bolted into the camp, and he was sci
E zed and carried to his quarters in triumph
there to dream of loves metamorphoses
: back ward rides. sternway advances, and a
larms of INVASION and thereby TO garnsl
his mind with materials for writing splen
/ did treatise on the novel adventure ofcowolc
III gv - Consolidation