The Iowa patriot. [volume] (Burlington [Iowa]) 1839-1839, 1839-06-27

IVY ne means OF playing OH Inlschley-
Gus joke to the great amusement of the
by-standers.
Mr. Smith, the young gentleman to|
whom we allude, being one day at the
village tavern, entered into conversation
with genteel looking stranger. while the
slandlady was preparing some refreshments
with which to recruit the exhausted form
and spirits Of her guest. The converse
ton commenced on the difficulty Of pro-
nouncing some of the names Of places of
Indian origin, which are so frequently
met with inthe New England States. In
the midst Of the colloquy, Mr. Smith saw
his political opponent, Waite Martyr,
coming down the road. He was certain
that Waite would pop into the tavern,
and on the spur Of the moment laid his
plans accordingly.
What you say, sir said Mr. Smith, re-
specting these Undertaking names, is per-
fectly correct agree with you entirely
and am much gratitied to make the ac-
quaintance of gentleman Of so much
taste. But, deare sir, there are familiar
English words, which although they may
not be difficult to pronounce, are exceed
ingly difficult to repeat. For instance, it
is almost impossible for any one not ia
miliar with the practice, to pronounce the
words thirteen votes, thirteen votes, thir-
teen votes, for any length Of time without
making the most ludicrous mistakes.
Thirteen votes, thirteen votes, thirteen
votes! repeated the stranger. / do not see
any difficulty in that. could 60 on re-
peating the words thirteen votes, thirteen
votes until tomorrow morning.
It's far more difficult, my dear sir, than
you imagine, replied Mr.. Smith in the
blandest manner. | am not much in the
habit of betting but for the curiosity Of the
thing, | am willing to bet you the price Of
dinner for yourself and horse, that you
cannot repeat in rapid succession the
words thirteen votes, thirteen votes, thir-
teen votes, for fifteen minutes, without
making some egregious plumbers.
Done, said the traveller-who rejoic-
ed at the idea Of paying the landlords
charges SO easily-and I will begin at
once. So saying, he took out his watch,
and noted the time-then planting him.
self against the wall, with his face to-
wards the door, he assumed a look of
great determination, as if he had underta-
ken an unpleasant job, but was resolved
at all hazards to 60 through with it--and
commenced pronouncing with loud,
clear voice, with due emphasis and dis
cretion, the cabalistic words thirteen votes
thirteen votes, thirteen votes!
In the meantime, Mr. Martyr, not drea-
ming of the insult that awaited him, bent
his steps, as was his wont, toward the ia
vern. AS he reached the threshold of the
door, he heard the offensive words, thir-
teen votes, thirteen votes, thirteen votes!
and with frame trembling with fury
strongly imprinted on his rubicllnd visageI
ne abruptly entered the bar-room to con-
front the man who dared thus rriae with
his feelings and attempt to overwhelm him
with insult.
His eye, beaming with wrath, fell upon
the stranger, who regarded his whitening
glances with the most provoking indifer-
ence-and who paused not moment in
his recitation, but continued to repeat the
maddning words; thirteen votes, thirteen
votes, thirteen votes!
The indignant Martyr next caught al
sight of Mr.. Smiths countenance canvuls-
ed with laughter. What is the meaning
of this, sir, said he in voice of thunder.
But the only reply he received was from
the mouth of the stranger, who with the
most irritating pertinacity, continued to
bawl, even louder than before, thirteen
votes, thirteen votes, thirteen votes!
Martyr then advanced toward the stran-
ger, his frame absolutely quiyering with
rage.-Who are you, scoundrel demand
ed he In the most imperious manner, and
how dare you to insult me in this way?
The stranger thought the rage of Mar
tyn was counterfeited, and ruse of Mr..
Smiths to win the wager and in answer
to his question, shouted out in still lou
der voice than before, thirteen votes, thir-
teen votes, thirteen votes!
| will not putup with this insult scream
ed Martyr, doubling his fist, and putting
nlmSelI IN attltude..
Thirteen votes, thirteen votes, thirteen
votes. yociferated the stranger at the top
ofhis lungs.
lfyou repeat those words, again I will
knock you down, you rascal said the in
furiated Martyr, with a howl Of despera-
ton.
The stranger felt somewhat indignant
at being addressed in this rude and uncer-
emonious manner, but was determined to
win the wager, and raising his voice,
bawled with the lungs of a stentor, thir-
teen votes, thirteen votes, thirteen votes!
Take that then for your insolence,
shrieked Martyr, suiting the action to the
word, and giving the luckless traveller
box on the ear which laid him PROSTATE
with the floor.