The Iowa patriot. [volume] (Burlington [Iowa]) 1839-1839, 1839-06-13

that its father and mother were both dead,
and there was no one to take care of it;
and added that it was good to kill it. A
man showed me boy whom he and an
other man had prevented being buried
alive with his deceased mother! The
plea was, that he had no parents and he
might as well be buried with her!
CURIOUS CouRTsH1p AND CHRISTIAN
REsIGNATIoN.-Deac Marvin was a
worthy Deacon in Lyme. Connecticut,
and he fell in love-Deacons as well as
ministers are ''made of such frail stuff as
all the lighter sons of vanity" and are Just
as liable to stub their toes, bark their shins
or fall in love, as any other men:--Dea-
con Marvin fell in love with Betty Lee,
as pretty a lass as ever stepped into Lynn
meeting house of Sabbath day; and she
was as constant there as the Deacon him
self, TO say nothing of the minister
When the Deacon's love had waxed so
warm and uproarious that he could no
longer restrain himself, he mounted his
plough horse, and directed his course to
Captain Lees. Rejecting, on the way,
that it would i'll become the dignity of
deacon to make love as do the worlds
people, he determined to conduct opera
tons with serious gravity beftting the
occasion. He had studied his bible to
good purpose, and resolved to make the
patriarch Jacob his pattern. According
ly on finding himself by the side OF Miss
Betty, he lifted up his voice and kissed
her, yea, he kissed her again and again,
and he said, ''Betsy, verify, Betsy, the
Lord hath sent me to marry thee!' Betsy
had hitherto been little better than one of
the wicked; but the Deacon;s kisses had
wrought wonders, and, although there
was little mischief in her eye; she an
swered with all the resignation and sub
mission of Deacon's intended, to the
great Joy of Deacon Marvin, 'the will of
the Lord be DONE" They were M an and
wife in a fortnight.
FATHER HADN'T YOU BETTER TAKE
SHEEP Too?-A valued friend and an able
farmer, about the time temperance reform
was beginning to exert healthful inhu-
ence, said to his newly hired man, Jona-
than, did not think to mention to you
when | hired you, that think of trying
to do my work this year without ru m how
much more must give you to do without!
oh said Jonathan, don't care much
about it, you may give me what you
please sWell,' said the farmer, Il will
give you a sheep in the fall, if you wish
to do without Agreed said Jonathan.
The oldest son then said: father will
you give me sheep, if do without rum?'
Yes, Marshall, you shall have sheep
if you will do without
The youngest son, a STRIPPING, then
said:-'Father, will you give me sheepif
l do without eyes, Chandler, you shall
have sheep also, if you do without rum
Presently Chandler speaks again-'Fa.
Their, hadn't you better take sheep, too!'
This was poser, he hardly thought
that he could give up the good creature
yet. But the appeal was from source
not to be easily disregarded; the result
was, the demon rum, was thenceforth ban
ished from the premises, to the great Joy
and ultimate happiness of Ill concerned.
Mr.. WOODBURY. AND THE BROKER
An amusing anecdote, indicative of the
shrewdness and good management of Sec
rotary WOODBURY., is confidently related in
Wall street. An intelligent French Bro
ker, Mr.. D. some time since, discovered
that fraud had been committed on the
Revenue Department to the amount of
about thirteen thousand dollars. He pro-
ceeded to Washington, stated the case to
the Secretary, and made an arrang cement
to collect the money, provided he was al
lowed one half the amount collected
Mr.. Woodbury., in his great caution for
the security of the Government, insisted
that the District Attorney should be en-
ployed as counsel. To this part of the
arrangement the Broker reluctantly as
scented. A few days before the depar-
ture of MIR. Price, for England, he actual
ly collected the amount, but in the confu"
sion of the moment forgot to leave any
part of the money behind. Mr.. ID. now
calls on the Secretary of the Treasury for
$4,000, his share Of the recovery and the
Secretary refers him to Congress for an
appropriation, to make. good his contract.
Thus, by this operation, the loss of $13,-
900 is increased to $40, 500, if the Gov
eminent acts justly.-Couricr & Eagui-
rer.
A HEAvE OFFER1NG.-A Quaker in
vited person to dine with him, whom
he treated with an excellent dinner, a bot
tie of wine, and pipe Of tobacco. His
guest after drinking freely, became ex-
tremely rude and abusive to his host, In
somuch that the Quaker's patience was at
length quite exhausted and he rose up and
old rosead hin, in tho fo1lnuinr ysrnrds.