Liberty advocate. [volume] (Liberty, Miss.) 1835-1866, 1839-12-05
r E u BEN = MALL,
OR, THE YANKEE OUTWlTTED.
A TRUE STORY.

! ~4N' AAA"' tht'iNLflL w W 4 Asb'
TRUE STORY
In pleasant southern town, soiouned Reu-
ben Small, schooimaster--a restless, c0daver-
Gus individual-who some years previous to
the date Of our story, had emigrated from some
where along-shore, in the land Of steady hab-
its Now, Reuben having like most of his
Icountrymen, the organ Of acquisitiveness re-
markably developed, and not content with the
IemoIuments derived from his literary station,
drove large and profitable business in the
watermelon fine. The year in question:, his
melons were remarkably fine, and we're IN great
demand. Reuben guarded them from infancy
to the full fruiton ofmel0Hho08 with parents
care. He nursed each embryo, and saw with
pain a blossom nipped by bug or worm; and
oh! how he goried when he stood among them,
like father in the midst of his children, and
saw their striped backs grow broader and roun-I
der, beneath the genial influence of The sum
mor sun. At length it became evident to Reu-
ben that wolves entered his foId:--each MOI n.
some six or eight striped backs were among
the missing, leaving no trace OF their former
location behind them, save an oval impression
on the ground, like the print of departed hog
in a mudhole.-ThiS was not to be borne
Reuben glorlcd in his melons, and thought
Iof the dollars they would have brought him:
and his spirit was stirred to vengeance. De-
Itermining TO place the remainder out Of all
danger before executing his scheme otreyenge,
ne plucked all that were ripe, or nearly so, and
placed them away carefully in an upper room
| of his domiciI. Unfortunately for him, this
movement was observed by an idle wandering
boy, lone of the thieves) who, suspectng his
Intention, FASTENED 10 communicate It to his
Ilellows.-They, alarmed at the prospect Of
losing their plumber, and determined to outwlt
the master, Immediately held a secret council,
in which plan was suggested. and plot laid;
THE result will be found IN the sequel.
Night had thrown her mantle over the earth
land all honest people were at home, when
Reuben, anticipating ioray, and chuckllngI
over his ingenuity, unaware that his plan was
discovered, and armed with loaded pistols, en-
erged from his door, aud creeping along in the
shadow, at length deposited himself and his
oartiIery" in the fence cornet-determined to-
blaze away atlthe first intruder upon his prem
ises. All was stlI-not mouse or d cricket
disturbed the silence, but Reuben slept not
SOLITARY and alone he sat, like a grim senli-
mel on some beIeagured rampant, unconscious
that the enemy were at his gatesl Alas! could
he have beheld the scene transactlng on the
other side Of his house, how would his blood
have boiled within his veins. Slowly and ST.
lently party of fifteen or twenty boys APP
preached the window in Indian file; a ladder
is planted, the window is raised; their leaiersl
enters, line is formed, and melon after melon
is passed from hand to hand, like buckets at "A
fire, till all are safely deposited in the vaIlyI
below, to be removed at leisure. The enemy
departed unseen and unheard, The garrison
sIumbered undsturbed, while Reuben, uncon-
scous Of his loss, kept guard on the other side.
Hour after hour passed, but all was still; the
full moon had climbed TO her meridian; the
stars winked and Reuben nodded, when, 10! q
wandering jack-ass installing him for SUM
berng brother, put his head over the fence to
salute him; lifting up his trumpet voice, he
poured his unearlhly "Who0-ce dtc-haw, t0hee-
d,c lghee-aao,n into Reuben's atfrighcd ear
Reuben started, stumbled, and iell--bang, bang,
went the pistols; away ran the Jackass, and
away ran The schoolmaser, the one bringing
IN against a board fence, and the other against
his own kitchen door. Reuben's fuce was soon
deluged with blood; for, as is usual IN such
cases. his organ of smelling struck first. Al
frighted, bruised and dirty, he scrambled IN,
struck light, washed his face, and started 10
bed in his way there, he passed through the
room in which he had deposited his much loved
melons. A single glance told him they were
gone; the open window pointed out the way oil
their departure. Truly "misiortunes never
come alone"
To this day Reuben thinks the whole affair
was conducted by the devil and his ImPs--'he
young chaps having flown away with his mel,
ons, while The old 'un beloved in his ear, ana
knocked him down by kick on the nose with
his club foot. As confirmation OF the truth
of his story, he is ready to swear that the
marks of hoof were next morning distinctly !
visible outside the fence, also that the devil
started ofTin flash of lightning, with TWO dis |
.inct claps of thunder, leaving smell OF brlm-
stone behind him.
10 those who have read our story, il is evil
lent that the lightning, thunder and birthstone
proceeded from the pistols, involunlarlly DIS
charged by Reuben--that the boys had outwit-
ed tho Ynnkec, and two jackasses had fright