Maumee express. [volume] (Maumee City, Ohio) 1837-1838, 1838-03-17

TRY his hand at Ayin, and.he IL no great
dab at flyin, neither. Well, The moment
he's out Of water, and takes to fyin, tie
sea fowl are arter him, and lei him have
lit; and ifhe has the good luck to escape
them, and dive into the sea. the dolphin,
as like as not has d dig at him, that
knocks moe wind out 0f him than he
got while aping thebirds, plaqy siolit.
guess the blue-noses know list about
as much about politics as this foolish fish
knows about flying. All critters inau-
ture are better in their oaon element.
Itbeats cock fightin, tell you, 10 hear
the blue-noses, when they get together,
talk politics. They have got three Or
four evil spirits, like the Irish Banshees.
that they, say cause all the mischief in
the Province--the Council, the Banks,
the House Of Assembly, and the Law
yers.- If a man places higher vaIia-
ton on himself than his neighbors do,
and wants to be magistrate before he
is fit to carry the ink horn for one, and
finds himself safely delivered Of mis-
take, he saysit is all owing to the Coun-
Gil. The members are cunnin critters,
too. they know this feelin, and when
they come home from Assembly, and
people ak EN-, where are all them are
fine things you promised us 2 Why,
they say, we'd had 'em all for you, but
that eternal Council, they nullifed all we
did. The country will come to no good
till them chaps show their respect forit,
by covering themselves with homespul.
If man is so tarnation lazy he wont
work, and in course has no money, why
he says its all owin to the banks, they
wont discount, there's no money, they've
ruined the Province. If there beant a
road made up to every citizens door,
away back to the woods (who as like as
not has squatted there) why he says the
House of Assembly have votedaIl the
money to pay great mems salaries, and
thers's nothin left for poor settlers, and
cross roads. We'll, the lawyers come
in for their share Of cake and ale, too, if
they don't catch it, it's pity.
There was one Jim Munroe OF Onion
county, Connecticut, desperate idle
fellow, great hand at singin songs, a
skatin, drivin about with the gals, and
SO on Well, if any body's windows
were broke, twas Jim Munroe-andif
there were any Youngsters in want of
father they were sure to be poor Jim's.
Jist so it is with the lawyers here; they
stand Godfathers for every misfortune
that happens in the country. When
there is mad dog going about, every
dog that barks is said to be bit by the
mad one, SO he gets credit for all themis-
chief that every dog does for three
months to come. So every feller that
comes yclpin home from court house,
smartin from the law, swears he is bit by
a lawyer. Now theremay be something
wrong in all these things, (and il cant be
otherwise in natur) in Council Banks,
House ofAssemb.y, and Lawyers; but
change them all, and its an even chance
if you don't get worse ones in their room.
1t is in politics as in horses; when a
man has beast that's near about UP to
the notch, he'd better not swap him; if
he does. he's cen amost sure TO get one
not so good as his own. My ruls is, I'd
rather keep critter aohose faults do
kno,o, than change him for a beast whose
faults Idon'tknoD.