Litchfield enquirer., 1838-04-19


From long residence in this highly favored region,
having been repeatedly "rowed up" we feel our
selves entirely competent to the task Of describing
this very celebrated terra incognita which has for
such a length of time so completely nonplussed all
modern Geography-makers, and more particularly
put to fault the cyclopedan knowledge of that very
sapient race, the qudnuncs.
Salt River is /" name of most decided and une
quivocal Specification but the "local habitation of
the notorious stream which this name is appended,
has ever been and will for ages yet to come, re-
main profound secret known only to the initiated
We might tell readily enough of its Whereabouts, it
we chose, and thereby preserve the following vera
cous account from appearing in any wise apocrypha
even to the most sceptical; but we have most espe-
cal reasons for remaining dumb upon this points and
therefore the good natured world must perforce, par
don our playing mute, and content themselves far
as possible, with guessing.
Into what sea Salt River debouches-or whether
indeed it has any mouth at all-but rather like some
other riuers wot Of, is eventually swallowed up in
its own greatness-we frankly confess is more than
we know for, certes have never shed the light of
our countenance there or indeed ever heard Of any
one that had. But however that may be, whether it
has or has not mouth, is matter Of not even the
slightest moment, inasmuch the to thisrver
is at all times and in all seasons, Of all things in the
world the most feasibe-with perhaps the single ex-
ception of being "rowed up" as it is somewhat tech
nically termed by those acquainted with Salt River
navigation. Indeed, the celebrity and ease with which
transportation is effected this stream, is in the
broadest sense of the term amazing, and would sur
prise even locomotive Stephenson himself. If any
ncnes to be sceptica on this head, they can resolve
! their doubts by the simple experiment Of voyage.
| Mouth or no mouth, then, 60 on to say the
course Of this river is zig.zag and eccentric beyond
| that of any stream known and many we'll auhenti-
Gated and melancholy accidents related by old
voyagers having occurred at most every step Of its
course such as men losing their purses, wits, and
even their heads, as they have been hurried some-
what too rapidly around the salient angles and sharp
turns with which this stream abounds. 1t is also rich
| in rapids, which many times brawl and dance about
after fashion ways pleasant; and BESIDES it par
tcularly excels in eddes, whirlpoos, hidden rocks,
and quick sands; all of which 60 very far toward
making trip UP this stream, to say the least unpeas-
ant. The water of this river is extremely brackish
arising, it said by somewhat curious in such mat
ers from the great showers of constantly shed
|
of accounting Tor the phenomenon, however, we con-
ess smacks somewhat strongly of the fancfu Its
lar is bilious and forbdding; and as regards its tase
with the exception Of the aforesaid saness we
didly avow our utter ignorance. We think, however
that the water must be peculiarly nauseous and dead
ly; for, like the Dead Sea, (Which by the way, we
take to be that part Of Salt River, which the cities of
Sodom and Gomorrah were formerly rowed up,) it is
utterly destitute of fish, and boasts no inhabitants
whatever to its waters excepting bul.frogs, which
grow here to a size truly enormous. 1t is especially
provdential that these musical animals are placed in
the river for beside the screech.ows note the croak
of the bu-rog is the only natural music provided for
the edi6caon and delight Of the miserable wretches
inhabiting the sterile shores skirtng Salt River.
The adjacent country" is desolate and dreary to
degree that beggars all power of description. 1t is
densey inhabited; but the poor people living or rath-
er existing, in this barbarous and nhospitabe region
have the most squalid, sicky, hangdevl look, con-
cevable: to a stranger, they seem each one an in
carnaton Of wretchedness and blue-devilism; and
yet strange to say, every year numbers of emf
grants rush in and take up their abode many of them
for lite.
History-I supposed this country was first explo-
red by Adam and Eve Immediately after their eviction
from the happy garden; this is matter of tradi-
ton; thing however is certain that as early as
the food this country, unlike the rest of the world,
became densely peopled and has continued to be so
ever since. In its day and generation, it has been
the abode Of many Of the most distinguished charac-
tiers in oil history. Amongst Others Socrates, julius
Cesar, Peter Stuyvesant, John c. Calhoun, Esq
Mrs. Eaton, Gov. Edwards Deacon Giles and Mr..
Kendall. have found it convenient, at one time an
other during their lives to reside here besides hosts
of others, of every age and nation, whose names still
remain the glory and boast of the Salt River country
GeOlogy-Partakes of the character of the people
transition with trap in various places.
Minerals-Razors, pistols, daggers, halten and salt.
petre. Arsenic abounds; also tombstone marble
VegeiabIes-Weeping willow, yew, pg.wanut, might
shade, aloes and cayenne pepper Hemp is also found
in great abundance.
Animals-Apes, Jackasses, and Gal-nppers. Ills
also much infested with vermin.
Capital Town-Coven,ry, very old and hourshina
place, supposed to have been built BY the Round.
heads in tho time Of Cromwell, and now utterly "a.
nous from It's having been the place where Praise.
God BarebOnes assembled HE Rump PaFliament.-
The u g. Senate have for some winters past occupi.
ed the same identical house for THAR s,nga and !. IL
said, sustain the dignity and character Of the place
admirably. The population Of Coventry Ia not def. |
nilsly known II has however received some impo. |
sing additions since the late election in Connecticut
Il has lately been quite current heFe that sundTy not
Vsry learned Judges were som expected from The land
Of ssady habits. besides U, 0. Senator o. 90. In.
deed some have gone % aP o. 10 whisper about that