Maumee express. [volume] (Maumee City, Ohio) 1837-1838, 1838-06-09

led to 90 back to Jamaica Street, and seek a
lodging from his newly acquired acquaintance,
the school, master. The favor wasreluctanty
granted, for the pedagogue did not much like so
speedy familiarity on the part of an unknown
adventurer as he was however unwilling to Of
fend customer with whom he had driven
good bargain. "A bed in this case necessarily
implied something like supper also. The do
mimic, accordingly, brought out bottle of
strong ale, and the soes of a small loaf and
poor cheese, which, being all the provision he
had in the house, he divided with his guest.
Tam then gladly stretched his wearied bones
beside his new friend, fully trusting that he
would rise refreshed man in the morning,
and be ready to set about the business of procu-
ring the security, if not that of the school it
self. The actual and future teachers had not
been in bed above an hour, when the former
was aroused from sumber by a terrible blow
on the face, which before he was fully awake,
was followed up by another on the breast,
that almost took away his breath. He soon
became aware that these blows were bestowed
by his new acquaintance and bed fellow, and,
instantly supposing that the bnrgain about the
school was the trick of a burglar or murderer,
he started up, rushed to the window, and bawl-
ed into the street 'Police! Police! murder!
murder! at the top of his voice. Tam, uncon-
scious OF what was passing, continued to lay
on, though ne was only beating the air. He
was however speedily dragged out of bed by
the dominic, and upon opening his eyes, found
a policeman holding lantern to his face. 1t
was IN vain that he protested his innocence of
the intentions attributed to him, and that he
was incapable ofinjuring, or desiring to injure,
gentleman whose kindness to him had been SO
conspicuous. The fears of the pedagogue
were ever more effectually reused, when the
hight enabled him to perceive that he was half
covered with a stream of blood which flowed
from bis nose, and nothing could satisfy him
but that Tam should be marched off to the
station-house. Ruefuy did the poor fellow
don his travel-soied clothes, and ruefully did
he descend the long common stairs which led
to the street, amidst the wonderment of the
half-dressed natives, who peeped at him from
their doors. When he had walked little
way, the policeman became convinced of his
innocence, and declared he would not take him
to the Office. But if don't 60 there said
Tam, 'where am l to 60, for am quite q
stranger in this townl' ~.,,'
To save him from the alternative of staying
on the streets all night, the policeman com.
passionately led him to lodgnghouse, which
he knew in place called Richmond Court, ant
there made interest to get him accommodated
Tam did not delay long to throw his exhausted
frame on the bed assigned to him. But he hat
hardly stretched himself down, when the whole
mattrass below him began to rise and fall like
/, a wave of the sea. Helay wondering whenc,
this motion could proceed, or if:the molten wa
in the bed at all, and not in his own excite
= brain.i That it was in the bed however, b
soon discovered, for up again rose the matt
. rass; and as it sunk,he thought he heard it emf
sort of growl. A cold perspration brok
upon him, and he began to wonder whit wa
. next tohappen. There was long pause, an
) he would have fain persuaded himself that i
: was all dream; but as yet he had not bee
:, asleep. In the midst of his ruminatiuns, III
again rose the mattrass and as it sunk, ther
was strange noise as if there were glan
snuffng about him, and smelling for his blood
Tam could endure this no longer; 80 he bolte,
on his feet and groped his way to the door
He was out of the room before he was aware
and in the midst of another, where pedlar wa
lying with his pack at his head. The nois
soon woke the merchant, who, accustomed t.
use prompt measures for the protection of hi
property, rose and collared him before he ceul
speak word. The whole household, mistress
7 servants, and dodgers, speedily assembled roun
the struggling pair; and there ensued seen
which none but Cefvantes or Smollet
, could have painted. When the excitement c
the parties had little subsidized, Tam succeed
ed in convincing the group that the frightenin
y the pedler had been merely a. consequence c
: his being himself frightened, anu his desire
n adjourned to his own room to enquire into tn
original cause of the disturbance. 1t was 500
discovered that large Newfoundland dog ha
taken up his quarters underneath thebed, whc
s was of very low construction. There ha
j. been at first sufficient room for it; but whe
!, Tam lay down, the matrass, bending benea1
" his weight, had incommoded the animal,
g that it was under,the necessity of seeking
e relieve Itself by rising. All was now explain
ed to the satisfaction of the landady, the pee
n ler, and the bystanders; but Tam was now n
: longer in fit state to sleep. The spirit und'
: which he commenced his expedition was ev'
porated, and a nervous tremor had taken II
s place. Throwing himself once more into h
clothes he left the house, and was passed ii
J. Gibbet Toll in twinkhng. Daylight ha
q hardly broken before he was over Soutrahil
:. and his father was just sitting down to Dime
.. when Tam came in with face which the ol
|. man thought was not earthly. All that Tai
d said, however, was that he was unwell; so, q
4 ter getting some warm broth, he went to be
\. and slep for two days, but never said wor
= about his having goneto Edinburgh to buy tn
IL rood will of school. ~ % ,p a..
:. Now, it would prevent all such disasters 9
J. this, ifthose who are addicted, to humping
IS their sleep would only confess it to their inter
/. ded bedfellow before going to rest. Then til
i. following precaution could be adopted:-
v the thumper was putting on his night-shirt, Il
:. him not put his arms into the sleeves, hut han
Ii these by his side, and let his companion crot
X the sleeves over the thumper's breast, and bu
49,. .ho,, <oro, h or hobind bia ha or He wou