Herald of the times. [volume] (Newport, R.I.) 1830-1846, 1838-09-06
[WnoLE No. 44O.
A CURE FOR SMUGGLING.
From the second series Of Sam Slick

4
Uhererer naim does least, mnn does most,
said the Clockmaker. Gist see the difference
atween these folks here to Liverpool, aud
them up the bay Of Fundy. There natur'
has given them the finest country in the
world she has taken awny all the soil from
this place, and ci,ucked it out there, and Ieft
notIin' but rocks and stones here. There
they gist vcgetate, and here they 60 ahead
like any thing | was credibly informed,
when Liverpool was first settled, folks had to
carry little light ladders on their shoulders to
climb over the rocks, and now they've got
better streets, better houses, better gardens.
and a better town than any Of the boy men,
4 They carry OH considerable Of n fishery
here, and do great stroke in the timber bu-
sness.
| shall never forget talk had with Icha-
bod Gates here, and fro!ic him and me had
with tide waiter. lchabod had large
store o. goods, and was in there one cvcnln'
a.drnkin' tea along with him, and we got IA
ialkiD' about smngglin'. Says he, Mr.. Slick,
your people ruin the trade here, thcy do
smugglc so don't know us ever shall be
able to get rid Of my stock 0f goods, and It
cost me a considerable of n sum tOo. What
pity il is them navy people, instead oi car
/ ir,im' irciglts of money from the West lnd.
fisheries aud our trade. Why don't you
smugglc then ton, says l, aud meet 'em ~
their own way Pitt for tat-dlnmond cut
Diamond smugslc yourselves aud seIze
them free trade aud sailois' rights Is or
maxim. Why. says he, ] amt glst altogether
certified that Ills right and IL goes ag'm my
conscience To do the like % that are, ut,d l
must say like fair deal. In gineral way
a'most,l we observed what's got over the dew
lis back is commonly lost under has belly
II don't seem To wear well. We'll, that's on
convenient, too, 10 be so thin skinned, sand l;
! for conscience most commonly has hide as
thick as the sole Of ones foot you may COW
or 1t with leather to make II look dcceht.lik",
but il III bear a considerable hard scrubbin'
without any thing over II. Now, says ], !
will nut you oil a track that will starvc you
without bringin' corns on your conscience Ell
thcr. Do you gist pretend To smngsie and
make believe Us If you were agon' the whole
hog in il. Its safer and full as profitable NJ
the rael thing and besides there's no sort I"
risk IN il in the world. When folks hear n
thing is smugg'cd they always think ts
cheap, and never look intn the price they
bite direciy-it's n grand bait that. Now
always onload your vessel at night, and let
folks hear "a cart agoin into your place utwcen
two aud three o'clock in the m"rnin'; tix ono
/ - the nxlcs so it will squeak like pig, and
do you look suspicious, mysterious, and ON
easy. Says You, (when chap says, guess
y"n were up late last MIGHTY AK me no qnes-
lions and III tell you no lies. There are so
many pimpn' eyes about now, body has TO
be cautious if lie don't wnrni to get into the
centre Of a hobblc. II Pun up late ! guess
It's nobod's business but my own Pm about
any how (; but | hope you wont make no re-
marks about what you seed or hccrd.
/ Well when O fcller nxcs arter a thing, do
you cist stand aud look at him for spncc
without sayin' word, cnquirin' like, with
dubcrsun' look, as IL you didn't know as yod
could trust him or no then gist wink, put
your finger on your nose,aDd say mum Is tho
word. Take candle and light il. and say,
follcr me now. and take him into the cellar.
Now. says you, friend. don't brtray me, be-
seecll you, for your lite don't let on to any
one about this place people will never think
o suspcciin' me il you only keep dark about
1T. III let you see some things, says yon,
that will please you, know (; but don't blow
mc-tla,'s u good soul. This article, says
you, atakin' up one that Gust three pounds. |
can afford 10 let you have us low as five
pounds, aud that one rs cheap a. SIX pounds,
on one conditlon,-hut mind you it's on them
terms only, and that is, that you don't tell
any one, not even your wife, where you got
il but you must promise me on the word
aud honour of a man. The critteT Will tall
right into the trap, aud swear by all thais
good he'l never breathe IL To lvin' SOU and
then 90 right of and tell his wife, and you
might well pour thing into filterin' stone
as into II wonian's ear; il will run right ihro',
and she'll go a braggin' to her neighbors OF
ihc bargain they got, and swear them to Sc
crccy aud they'll tell the whole country in
the same way. as a secret Of the cheap things
Ichabod Gates has. Well, the excise folks
will soon hear % this, and come and ssTch
your house from top to bottom, and the sarch
will make your fortin, for, as they cant find
nothln' you will get the credit Of doiu' the OF
fccrs in great style.
We'll, well, said lchabod, if you Yankees
don't beat all natur. | don't believe in my
soul there's a crtter in all Nova Scotia would
a. thought o. such a scheme as that, but it's
a grand joke, and comports with conscience,
for il parallels pretty close with the truth:
III Try it. Try it, says I, TO be sure lets go
right off this blessed night, aud hide away u
parcel Of your goods in the cellar,-put some
~ the garrct and some in the gig house.
Begin and sell tomorrow, und oil the timo
I'm to Liverpool, I'll keep q runnin' in aud
out y'h' " kfSt Sobhe
to the corner Of The fence, put my head over
and draw it back ng'in rs i'll didn't want
folks TO see Inc, and sometimes Ill make us
/! was agoin' out, and il | see any ane a
commin' III spring back and hide behind tho
door II will set the whole town on the look
out, and they'll say it's Inc that's asnugghn'
either Oh my own hook or yourn. IN three
duys he had grcnt run o custom, partIou-
larry artcr nightfall. II was fun alive to
see how the critters were banned by that
hoax.
On the iil:h day the tide. wa'ter came
Mr. Slick says he, I've got information ill-~---.
Glad 10 hear il, says !; an officer without
information would be a poor tool-thafs
fact We'll, IT brought him up oil stsnd'u,'
Saws he. do you know who You are stalkin'
to? Yes. says I, ] guess ] do 4; l'm tnlkin'
Ia a man Uf Information, and that heiO' the
case III be so bold as to ax you one question
-have you any tbii < to say TO mc, tor I'm IN
a considerable Of n hurry? Yes, said he,
have. Pm informed you have smuggled
20, in the house.
MIR Gaze, said he, give mc CANDLE
must go to the cellar. Sartainly, sir, said
H.