Maumee express. [volume] (Maumee City, Ohio) 1837-1838, 1838-03-31
mAg,rEE crry, oHro, SATURDAY, MARCH 81, nsas.

pity l have almost splendid warm coat
as are gentleman in these here woods
let him be who he will; but Igot no socks
to my feet. and have TO keep everlasting
ly a suckin my paws to keep 'em warm
If it warnt for that. ] guess I'd make
some O. them chaps that have hoofs to
their feet, and horns to their heads, look
about them pretty sharp, know. Its
dismal now aintit? If Ihad the framin
of the Governors message, if wouldn't
show 'em how TO pu: timber together
you may depend; Id make 'em scratch
their heads, and stare, / know.
| went down to Matanzas in the Full
ton Steamboat once--well, it was the
first of the kind they had ever seed, and
proper scared they were to see a vessel
without sails or oars, goin right straight
ahead, nine nots an hour, in the very eye
Of the wind, and a great streak Of smoke
:arter her as long as the tail of comet.
4 believe they thoughtit old Nick alive,
a atreaiin himself to swim. You could
see the niggers clippin it away from
the shore for dear life, and the soldiers a
movin about as though they thought we
were agoin to take the whole country.
Presently little, half starved, orange
colored looking Spanish officer, all dres-
sed off in his livery, as fine as a fiddle,
came off with two men in a boat to
board US. Well, we yawed once or
twice, and motioned to keep off, for fear
he would get hurt. But he came right
on afore the wheel, and | hope may be
shot, if the paddle didn't strike the bow
of the boat with that force, it knocked
up the s.arn like plank tilt, when one
of the boys on it were heavier than 10th
er, and chucked him right atop of the
wheel house Jou never seed a TELLER in
such dunderment in your life. He had
picked up little English from seein our
folks there so much, and when he got
up, the first thing he said was, Damn al
shcenery, say, where's my boat 2 anc
he looked around as if he thought it hac
jumped on board too. Your boat, sale
The Captain, why | expect it's gone tc
the bottom, and your men have gone t
look arter it, for we never seed or heert
tell of one or tother of 'em arter the boa
was struck. Yes, I'd make 'em star,
like that Spanish officer, as if they look
out Of their eyes for the first time. Gov
ernor Campbell didn't expect to see sue
a country as this, when he came here,
reckon, know he didn't.
| When | was little boy, knee high 0
so, and lived down Connecticut river
Mother used to say, Sam, if you don
Igive over acting so like old Scratch l.
send you off to Nova Scotia, as sure g
you are born, l will, VOW. Well, lore
how that are used TO frighten me it a
ways made my hair stand right on eenc
like cats back when she's wrathy
made me drop it as quick as wink--lk
a tin night cap put on dipped candle Q
going to bed, it puts the fun right ou
Neighbor Dearborn's darter got mar
.ried to a gentleman in Yarmouth, tha
speculates in the smuggling line wei
when she went on board to sail down t
Nova Scotia, all her folks took on asifi
was funeral; they said she was goin
Ito be buried alive, like the nuns in Portr
gale that get frolickin; break out of tn
pastur, and race off and get catched an
brought back agin. Says the old Kur
mel, her father, Deliverence, my dear,
would sooner foller you TO grave, for tha
would be an eend to your troubles, ,ha
to see you go oA'to that dismal country
its nothin but an iceberg aground an
he howled loud as an Irishnan that trie
to wake his wife when she's dead. Aw
4 ful accounts we have Of the country
4 that's fact; but,if the Province is nc
so bad as they make it out, the inhabit
J, ants are thousand times worse.
\ You've seen flock Of Partridges {
! frosty morning, in the fall, crowdl
out Of the shade to sunny, and huddli
up there in the warmth--well, the blu
|. noses have nothing else to do. half tn
time, but sun themselves. Whose fau
J is that ! Why, its the fault Of the Le
gislature they don't encourage inter
nal improvements, nor the investment 9
capitalin the cs.ntry /; and the result Il
apathy, inaction and poverty. The.
spend three months in Halifax, and wha
!, do they do? Father gave me dolla
once, to go to the fair at Hartford, an
/ when lcame back, says he, Sam, wha
have you got TO show for it7 Now,
az, what have they show for their thre
Ilmonths sittingl They mislead folks
/ they make EN- believe all The use of Al
\ sembly is to bark at Councillors, Judge