Maumee express. [volume] (Maumee City, Ohio) 1837-1838, 1838-03-17
:.
Number 80.

what nol.-J Like all iolkS VINO wade so
deep, they cant always tell the natur of
the ford. Sometimes they strike their
shlns against snag or a rock at other
times, they 60 whap into a quicksand,
and if they don't take special care, they
are apt to souse over head and ears into
deep water. | guess fthey'd talk more
OF Rotations, and less of elections, more
of them are Dykes, and less Of Banks,
and attend more to top dressing, and less
to re-dressing, it would be better for
'em.
| Now you mention the subject, think
have observed, said !, that there is a
great changein your countrymen in that
respect. Formerly, whenever you met
an American, you had dish Of politics
set before you, whether you had an ap-
petite or not; but lately have remark
ed they seldom allude to it. Pray to
what is this attributablcq guess, said
he, they have enough Of it to home, and
are sick of the subject. They are cured
the way the pastry cooks cure ;heirap-
prentlces OF stealing sweet notions out OF
their shops. When they get new ap.
prentice they tell him he must never so
much as look at all them are nice things,
and if he dares to lay the weight of his
finger upon one of them, they'll have him
up for it atore justice they tell him
its every bit and grain as bad as stealing
from till. Well, that's sure to set 'em
at it, just as high fence does breachy
OK, first to look over it, and then push it
down with his rump, its natur. Well,
the boy eats and eats till he cant eat no
longer, and gets sick at his stomach, and
then he hates the sight Of sweetmeats
afterwards.
We've had politics with US till we're
dog sick of 'cm, | tell you. Beside, we
are asfar from perfection as whenw set
out rown for it. You may get purity Of
elections, but how are you to get purity
of Members 1t would take great
deal OF cypherin to tell that. Inever
heerd tell of one who had seed it.
| The best member | cen amost ever
seed was John Adams. Well, John
Adams could no more plougha straight
lurrow in politics than he could haul the
plough himself. He might set out
straight at beginnin for little way, but
he was sure to get crooked atore he got
TO the eend of the ridge-and sometimes
he would have two or three crooks in it.
used to say to him, how on airth is it,
Mr.. Adams Qof he was 10 way proud
like, though he was president of oul
great nation, and it is allowed to be the
greatest nation in the world, too; for
you might see him sometimes of an ar
lernoon swimmin along with the boys
in the Potomac do believe that's the
way he larned to give the folks the dodge
so spry J well, used to say to him, how
on airlhis it, Mr.. Adams, you can't make
straight work ON it? He was ga grand
hand at an excuse Qhough minister used
to say that folks that were good at an
excuse, were seldom good for nothin
else J sometimes, he SAID, the ground
was so tarnation stony, it throwed the
plough out |; at,other times he said, the
off OK was such an ugly wilfm tempered
crtter, there was. no doin nothn with
him; or that there was so much machi-
merry about the plough, it made it plagy
hard to steer, Or may be it was the fault
of them that went afore him, that they
laid it down so bad; unless he was hired
for another term of four years, the work
wouldn't look well; and if all them are
excuses wouldn't do, whyhe would take
to scolding the niger that drove the
team, throw all the blame on him, and
order him to have an everlastill lacin
with the cowskin. You might as well
catch weazel ASLEEP as catch him.
He had somethin the matter with one
eye--well, he knew | know'd that when
| was boy; so one day, feller pre-
sented petition to him, and he told hirs !
it was very affectin. Says he, it fairly
draws tears from me, and lis weak eve
took to lettin off its water like statiec
SO as. soon as the Chap went, he winks
to me with toner one, quite KNOWN, as
mu,;h as to say, you see, its all In my
eye, Slick, but don't let on to any one
about ii, that said so. The eye was
regular cheat. a complete New Eng
land wooden nntmeg. Folks said Mr..
Adams was very tender hearted man.
Perhaps he was, but | guess that eye
didn't pump its water out o that place.
Members in general aint to be depen-
ded on, | tell you. Politics makes
man as crooked as pack does pedlar !;
not that they are SO awful heavy, neither
but it teaches man to stop. In the long