Herald of the times. [volume] (Newport, R.I.) 1830-1846, 1838-12-05


lar. 1t the "Sober second thoughts Of the
people" don't give him hearty welcome, we
are very nuch mistaken.
To the Editors of the New York Daily Ex-
press--the same piper my old friend Mr..
Dwight printed spell ago.
New YoaK, last of November, 1888.
GENTLrMEN,-Thc "Two Polies" having
been considerably put back in iittln out, OWN
TO the notion Of myin up steam TOrkS aboard
on her. so as to make her equal to the British
folks-,hc "Grcat Western" and so forth
hant had no time to look about me of late.
or take much of hand in any other public
matter; but find there is considerable work
TO be done elsewhere, and have jist got
long and sad Letter from Uncle Sam" who
IS awfully wamble crop'd and wants me to
come on to Washington aud help him over
some of his troubles. He tells me his barn
is full Of rats-plenty of straw,but little grain
and also that the .AbotiioniSts, the .1nii-
.UasonS, the Canaia Patriots, the Sub Irea-
s"rers, the hart currency .|oiks, and lot of
other HrmBuGs, are all bescttng him; and,
he says, If will only come on and stand by
him wen go through all these troubles like
"a dose of salts, and so forth. Now, there
never was the time yet that | ever let Lucie
Sam want friend if could get to him; and
so III let the folks here tinker at the safety
valves and steam kittles and get them all
snug, and III 20 to Washington and lend
tncfe Sam and Congress hand for spell.
There arc no two things in all creation
like so well as 6locing mp humJugs, ard rai
.haHtiHg; and there are no two things in any
county That stand SO poor chance as rats
and humbugs- in this country when the pco.
pie get notion Of acting on "sccoud sober
thoughts" so MS Uncle Sam seems TO be on
that tack, it wont be much of Job. have
tcl'd hlm the first thing TO be done is to look
to the old barn, and he must lose no time to
secure the sarvlces of all the best Terriers in
the country, and got en- in good training, es.
pecialiy all the old and well tried ones, who
know how 10 station themselves and not like
'ly to be led off on the wrong track--that
could rely on such as old Snap, and Ciincher
and Spring, and GRAB, and Pmcher, aud
Smash, and I'eiStGr, aad such like, for ] have
tried en- oil and if a rac rat comes within
Jumping distance Of any Of these he wont
know his head trom his tail arter one squeak.
All these old and faithful critturs amt had O
iair Chance at rat hunt for long while, for
whenever thcy have taken their stations there
has been such di,St raised that there was no
seeing DnCie Sam or the rats that he wanted
to clear out; but things will be differently
managed hope this time, and we don't mean
to make much noise about it. a lcetle
asaiitily to let EN- know trouble is coming,
and then one shake and squeak and that
vii! be the last of" u rat"
After finishing of that business and husk-
ing and thrcshing out what grain remains, and
Citing that matter all balanced up, (if there
Is any balance lcil) we will next see about
sitting some of these humbugs Uncle Sam is
pes,crcd with Of late. For II rally does seem
to me if "sccond sober thoughts" don't open !
folks eyes and let EN- see the difference twiXt /
sound common sense and humbug, we best /
stop talking OF "intciiigence" and take up old |
Dllworth and 90 to school again.
1t was all the fashion spell ago,with some |
folks, 10 talk up the doctrine that rich folks |
Oppressed poor jo'ks supposing ,ha, there was
more poor folks than rich ones, that doctrine
would gain most votcs-and so it did for a
spell, til the second sober thoug hts" of the
people convinced them that rich folks and
poor folks were equally useful to and de-
pendent upon one another, and that separa-
ton did each equal harm, and so that cock
wouldn't hght--thcn agn i; was said one
man was as good as any other mnnno matter
how ragged and dirty his shirt was, that this
was free country, and eny man who wore
u clean shirt ana had money in his pocket
was an aristocrat, and warn't to be trusted
no how and no way in the world-and that
he was tdial Conservative Fe!erGL-but a
ragged dirty shirt and no money was the sign
OF good and reliable democrat-and he was
the man to be trusted. But the "sober sec
Ond thoughts" Of the people found out that
this was not sound doctrine, tho it sounded
well. There was something in 1t that SEEM
cd to war against common sense and hold up
a bonus to the protlgate-it seemed to say,
'Iyou work and make yourselves indie pendent
OF uS-tce that is y. S. wont trust you. Keep
poor and dependcnt-and submissive, and
hurraw for us, and wen take care on you.-l
Well, so 1t was--and Uncie Sans barn tells
the rest of the story. Now tins Is one hum
bug that is blown up, by what may be call'd
I"spontaneous combustion"
The next is-but to make long story
short best put all the rest Of the humbugs
IN one pot,-ior they al belong to the same
mess-thero is Masonry and anti Masonry,
.I,otltion and dHi-.lboiuion, and all The rest.
not excepting Hayd Currency and Sub Ired.
sury and .4aimaL .Nngnet,Sm-thc "sober
second thoughts" of the People will klndle a
fire under this pot and bile it down to dish
and then hand 1t over to the teGaers and let
them eat it. The folks who get up these
humbugs must have very little useful employ
mcnt 10 be trublcd with, and il is al old and
true saying of old uncle Hugh Williamson to
a son OF his'n--"l want you my SON. says he
To be useiully employ y'd-and if don't find
something for you to do I'm afraid the Devil
will" And just so it is now a.days.
| have ben thinking good spell what to
say ofthcse matters.
There are two kinds of folks employ'd in
carrying on n h'mbug--thc cute cunning
iolks,and the honcst ignorant folks. A"word
To the wise" is said to be sufficient, but a
buShcl OF words TO The ignorant amt onuf-l
so wont waste time or words on airy one on
en-, but ! say 10 he honest icko amt ignorant
and that class is big enuf to keep things
strait and TO straitcn the crooked too-look
to it, keep your "second sober thoughts"
about you-ond if that aint cnuf 90 to the
Hird aud be assured that what tell You is
true-that the great dVircnce between The
ieaders and Their .toHouers, in all hamJugs is
ist ths--onc class knoTs lis all ctarnal non
sense and toNer don't and that is dividing
what call rdie compliment twix'd both on
EN-. Your friend,
J. DOWNING, Major
n a 4 .