Herald of the times. [volume] (Newport, R.I.) 1830-1846, 1837-09-14
tFrom the Newark Daily Advertiser.
YOUR CHILDREN.

Oil uoWn among your Htue CniiuTeH, anu
let me say word to you about family gov
ernment. We good people of America, in
our rage for government, are in danger
Of not governing ourselves. Onr lads grow
mp insnbordnate; finding Quite our and their
cost, that "it is free country" An English
traveller could find no boys in the United
States; all being either children or men. The
evil 10 nndcniably on thr Increase. Parent
sre abandoning the rcins; and when once
this shall have become universal, all sorts Of
government but despotlsm will be impractica.
BILE.
Take the froward child in hand at once, or
you will soon have to be his suppliant, rather
than his guide. The old way was perhaps
too rugged, when every thing was accom-.
plished by mere dint Of authority; but the
new way IL as bad on the other side; no man
il redncel to the necessity Of choosing an
extreme.
We often visit houses where the parents
seem to be mere advisory attendants, with a
painful sinecure. Let such hear the words
of a wise congressman Of New Jersey. and a
signer Of the Declaration. There is not n
more disgusting sight than the impotent rage
Of parent who has no authority. Among
the lower ranks of people, who are under no
restraints from decency, you may sometimes
zee father or mother running out into the
street after child who has fled from them,
with looks Of fury and words Of execration;
and they are often, stupid enough to imagine
that neighbors or passengers will npprov'
them in their conduct, though in fact it ills
every beholder with horror" | am afraid
none of us need 60 many rods from home to
witness the like. What is commonly admin
istered rs a reproof is often worse than moth
ing. Scolding rebukes are like scaldng po-
tons; they lnjure the patient. And angry
chastiss ment iS little better than oil on the
fire. Not long since ! wns passing by the
rail road from Newark to New York. The
train Of cars pursued its furious way immcdi-
atcly BY the door Of low "shanty," from
which n SMALL child innocently issued, and
crossed the track before us just in time to es-
cape being crushed by the locomotive. We
all looked out with shuddering, when Il! ! the
sturdy mother, more full of anger than alarm,
strode forth,and seizing the poor infant which
had. strayed only in consequence of her own
negligence, gave it a summary apd violent
correction. Inference: parents often deserve
the strokes they give.
Implicit obedience-nnd that withour ques-
ton, expostnlation, or delay-is the keystone
Of the family arch. THIS is perfectly con-
sistent with the ntmos. affection and should
be enforced from the beginning and absolute
ly. The philosopher whom | cited above
says Of parental authority: ~ would have it
early that it may be absolute, and absolute
that il may not be seYere. it,bolds uniyersai-
~ in families aud schools, and even the. great
or bodies Of men, the army and navy, that
those who keep the strictest discipline give
the fewest strokes" Some parents seem to
imagine that their failures in this kind arise
from the want Of certain mysterious knack,of
which they conceive themselves to be destl.
tute. There is such q kDack; but X is as
much within reach as the knack Of driving a
horse and chsisr, or. handling a knife and
fork, and will never be got by yswning over
u.
Not only love your children, but show
that you love them; not by mere fondlng and
kissing them, bot by. being always open to-
their approaches. Here is man. who drives
his children out Of his shop because they
pester him; here Is another who is always
too busy to give them good word. Now I
would learn Of these penny wise and pound
foolish fathers, what work they expect ever
to turn out which shali eqaal'iH importance
for lite. Hnpless is that child which 10 forced
10 seek Zoe companions more accessible and
winning than its fnther or its mother.
You may observe that when workingman
spends his leisure hours abroad, il is at the
expense Of his family. While he 10 at the
club or the tavern, his boy or girl is seeking
out. of-door connection. The great school Of
juvenile vice 10 the STREET. Here The ur.
chin, while he "knuckles down attaw." learns
the vulgar oaih.or the putrid obscenity. For
one lesson st the 6reside, he has a dozen in
the kennel. Here are scattered the seeds Of
fslsshood, gambling. then, and violence. I
pray you, 40 you love ysur own flesh and