Morning herald. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1837-1840, 1837-10-13

hearts, lvers and souls-amonp the latter there was
enc in particular that arrested my attention II was
in small box which labelled soul Tor Col, stone
lie opened the box and inside Of that were severaie
boxes but in the last which was very small there was
mustard seed shell in which the soul destined Tor
the long destitute and souess Colonel There SAID me
Doctor send that 10 MIR Bennett iyou will receive 1t
with this letter. and request him TO have the goodness to
present il To the Colonel.
He then showed me some elegant plucks, and one la
belled pluck for James Watson Webb-send that al
So said he, Mr. Bennett, give to Don Whiskeran-
do aud tell him not to funk again when he gets
challenge but stand the like man. and il
he gets his irtesiines blown out the Doctor will make
him present OF new set and make man OF him at
the same time. BY this you will perceive that the Doc
tors skill and science have dried up those humane
thoughts which cause the milk of human kindness to
flow. He is consderate and thinks that editors
ought possess souls and pucks well other peo-
pie.
Great room for speculation in this science
This wonderful discovery will be death blow to all
quacks-their day OF redemption is passed-ther fate
seaed-the patent ntestines will require no pills. 1t
will also be death blow to those who quack up with
the life insurance companies The DOCTOR says he will
not give half cent have hispatents life insured for
twenty thousand dollars for fifty years. barring bro
ken head or neck which he might get in the mean time
the more especially if he took tangleegs. This is
doubtless another classic word. j would have asked
its meaning but did like expose my ignorance
before learned professor told the Doctor that he
ought 70 be little circumspec for the corps medicinal
finding their occupation gone might magnetic or Lynch
him.
Great room for speculation, Mr. Bennett In times Of
peace prepare for In times of plenty provide for
famine. Get a calibre of the size required and eat G.
nough in January TO last till June. This will annih
late the monopozers and spectators III the provision
market. Fill your vicualling office and you not 10
be starved out on ury--nor polar bear hunt-nor
journey into the far west, an ordinary OK
ploring expedition.
The mind is filed with wonder in contemplating this
supedous science. Great advantages will accrue from
it, and some disadvantages 1t viii certainly give great
encouragement to bloaters and drnkersand place tenn
Perancc societies below parand it will drive teotasn
out Of the market
The Doctor showed me rcspectables that he said
for the nabubs and gormandizing aldermen Of
your city. They of the largest size, and manuac
tured expressly
Look out for strange sights, Mr.. Bennett, when the
scoundrels, sometimes pronounced council, get
operated upon You will not see them ia carriages
vending their way from gorge. No; not one OF them
will ride, but part Of all of them. You'll see then,
Mr. Bennett, with democratic republican spirit turn
their porters each walking oil with his german
died abdominal region in a wheelbarrow Rather odd
Mr. Bennett, TO man wheeling about his corpo
real system; but such is the effect of science Science
produces strange sights
Suppose said the Doctor, from grand gorge, that
Justification should take place The Doctor is rather
singular in his choice of words, but all great genulses
eccentric. You would suppose that very bad-but
il would be very bad after allon the contrary
might be turned 10 good account. IL would only be ne
cessary send for Of the poor house commissioners
second hand dinner il is true, would be rather nov
city III the market but good enough for paupers. The
Doctor would apply his all xen plaster, and no harm
be done
have studied the philosophy Of the and sciences
deeply continued the Doctor-even the last extrem
" and Is have actual remedy for that, can al
least mitigate the IA which flesh is heir was much
Interested Mr. Bennett. Ur~ai science thia-rcom for
much conjecture--I asked the Doc,,r "a explain-
why" he continued should patient after slip his
wind and become dc moytuis est would have his
voir completely renovated-clap to him gas pipe, and
have him inflated, and then the body IN strong
bag and al the word go-cut loose the chord, and
his friends would then have the satisfaction of seeing
him 90 heavenward, as every one ought TO do, when
he is done with trina "NesW he exclaimed, EN-
phaiically he is great enthusiast in his science.
Eyes they will 90 and keep going in that dry country,
till their old bones will rattle about in their bag like
parcel Of cooks-on-on-un they GET TO their desti.
natonand what then Why they will be better there.
and that's sufficient No rotting decaying NOR
tally blast the eyes of the living No call for
undertakers grave dggers, and headstone cutters
resurrection men, / shall make movement-re-
form the world-bcnett mankind whilst living, and
sst them when lead
"And 60 down." added, warned by his eloquence
and catching portion Of his fire, TO the latest pos
ierity honored and revered"
These, MIR. Bennett, only few Of the wonderful
effects produced, and be produced by the Doctors
skill in science and The wonderful operation de
scrbed the learned Doctor scientifically expressed
it-a close Homer-none of your non compossbillties-
none Of your animal nagnetisn--Maria Monk-sea
sarpents-moen yarns No; but the real Inluvne Jago
science-to doubt which would be highly ridiculous and
duphcareus. l speak from facts-tor am not one OF
those sPorgero in rugUa arabigaas If you doubt
New Jersey, &c. remain yours, respectfully
garry SIBous.