Du Buque visitor. [volume] (Dubuque, Lead Mines, Wisconsin Territory) 1836-1837, 1836-06-15

AoiduIc uISSipatlOn.-lhc principles Oh
my new companions were those Of in
fidelity, and l embraced them with my
whole soul. You know my former dis
position todoubt-that doubt was now
changed into settled unbclief, and a
bitter hatred towards all which had
once been taught to believe sacred and
holy.
"Yet amidst the balcful principles
which had iinbibed, one honorable
feeling still fingered in my bosom. like
beautiful angel in the companionship
Iof demons. There was one being
young and lovely creature, at whose
shrine all the deep affections of my
heart were poured out in the sincerity
of early love. She was indeed beau
|tiful girl-a being to bow down to and
worship; pure and high-thoughted as
the sainted ones of Paradise, but con-
fding and artless as child. She pos
sessedevery advantageof outward beau
ty-but it was not that which gathered
about her, as with spell, the hearts Of
all who knew her. 1t was the light of
her beautiful mind which lent the deep
witching of soul to her fine countcn-
ance-fashing in her dark eye, and
playing like sunshine on her lip, and
crossing her fair forehead with IN intel
lcctual halo.
"Allston! l look back to that spring
time of love even at this awful crisis in
my destiny, with a strange feeling Of
Joy. 1t is the only green spot in the
wilderness of the past--an oasis in the
desert of being. She loved me, Ais
ton--and heartmore precious than the
gems of the east, was given up to
wretch unworthy of its slightest regard.
"Hitherto pride rather than princi-
pie had kept me above the lowest de-
graduation Of sensual indulgence. But
for one fatal error might have been
united to the lovely being of my a6ec-
tions;-and, oh, if sinless purity and
persuasive love could have had power
over mind darkcned and perverted
as my own-Imight havcbecn reclaim
ed from the pathway Of ruin might
have been happy.
ssBut that fatal error came--and came
too, i'll the abhorent shape Of loathsome
drunkenness ! shall never, in time.
or eternity, forget that scenc,-i is en-
craven on my memory inletters Of fire.
1t comes up before me like q terrible
dream-but it is dream Of reality. 1t
dashed from my lips the cup Of happi-
ness, and fixed for ever the dark aspect
Of my destiny.
~ had been very gay, for there were
happy spirits around me; and had
drank freely and fearlessly for the first
time. There is something horrible in
the first sensations Of drunkenness. For
relief | drank still decper.-and was
drunk was delirious-I was hap
,py. left the incbriatcd assembly,
and directed my steps, not to my lodg-
ings, but to the home of her, whom |
loved-nay adored above all others.
Judge of her surprise and CONSERVATION
when | entered with flushed counten-
ance and an unsteady tread! She was
reading to her aged parents, when with
an idiots grimacc ! approached her.
She startled from her seatAsone glance
told me the fatal truth; and she sllrunk
from me-ay, from me, to whom her
VOWS were plightcd and her young af-
fcctions given-with fear, with loath-
ing, and undisguised adherence. IT.
ritated at her conduct, ! approached
herrudcly; and snatched from her hand
the book she had been reading. i cast
it into the flames which rose brightly
from the hearth. 1t was the volume
which you call sacred.- saw the smoke
ofits consuming go upward Ikea sac
rifice to the demon of intcmpcrancc,
and there-even thereby that Chris
tian Preside, cursed the book and its
author!
"Thc scene which followed beggars
description. The. shrek Of my bctroth-
ed-hcr sinking down in state of in
scnsibility--the tears Of maternalanguish
tho horror depicted on the counten-
ance Of the old man-all these throng
even now confusclly over my memo
ry. staggered to the door. The re- !.
ccption / had met with, and the excite
ment thereby produced, had obyiated i
il, some measure the effect Of intoxica-
ton; and reason began to assume its
empire. The full round moon was up
in the hcavens-and the stars-how
fair, how passing beautiful they shone
down at that hour! had loved to look ]
upon the stars those bright and bless {
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