Carroll free press. [volume] (Carrollton [Ohio]) 1834-1861, 1836-07-22

no better than a wonanl
sWhen made this astounding dis.
covery you may readily imagine my
ioOe evaporaIed with the speed Of .
hurst boi4eryleaviug me cnfy tue un'
comfortable aud unsaEisfaciOry assu.
rance OF being lied for lifelo q female
whose greatest pleasure would consist
in rendering me miserable Xanhpps
was a novice 10 my GsbrieIis, 10 the
art Of teasing. or Socrates wssan On.
grateful rascal for not thsNking his
judges on bis knees for their kiRluess
in cendet1 ding him TO drink hemlock.
For my part would voluntarily have
drank hemlock, or any other poison,
to have eased me ofmy tro0bles, had
| not accidentally discovered that ma :
deira was much more pleasant, and
equally eficscious, in rendering me
Indifferent to the 'little ways of my
quOndam angel and most excellent
RIB.
'She had obtained what she so much
needed and desired, an establishment,
where she cOaldsFutesa~aspsi
is to say, gave up my house to her
MANAGEMENT, while managed TO
ensconce myself pretty comfortable in
Deighboring tavern.
1T is true, did my part toward
bringing out the natural acerblty Of
my wlfe's tsrmsgant dispositions, by
disagreeing TO several little matters
she had get her heart upon, She be
gan to play the tyrant too soon. My
eyes were opened before | had given
my consent TO become Mr.. Howard,
and ObstinateIy did adhere to the
name had Inherited from the old tai.
lor. The poor woman who was proud
to excess Of her family name and blood
and my wealth, found a constant
source Of modification and irritation
in her marital acquisition Of name.
Mrs Butterbsll was hateful 10 her,
but Mrs. Jonathan ButterbaII perfect
Iy odious. The name of Jonathan
was prescribed, and Butterball not
allowed only ia cases Of absolute ne
cessi,y. My 'angeP that WoS, took
great delight in venting her spleen on
my devoted, head, until ] sometimes
felt ready TO give up in desPsir-sub.
hitting quietly, and with msekness, to
arbitrary government.'
'But / rallied again and again for
Independence, and at the end Of two
years found that and my dear wife
held ou.' own pretty equally. One
j thug l kaew, and the knowledge was
as dissgrseable to madame as il was
TO myself. I knew that Gabrielle
would remain Mes. ButterbaIl I'LL
death or the law should divorce US;
but consoIed myself with the reAeC-
tion, that the same kind dispsnsation
which relieved her from this annoy.
anee, would also rei!ev6 me from a
still greater.
fortunately, we were not blessed with
, any pledges of our mutual hate, so that |
felt could bear the loss of my 'angel,
should it please the humor of any of our
CAV friends to take her off my hands, and
3 such contamination | had great hopes
} of seeing realized. had long before in
/ timated to my better half, that though !
!, could not consent to give up tho name Of
Butterball myself, was SO far melted by
-. her prayers, that | would willingly join
9 in petition 10 the Legislature that she
! should be released from bearing it. The
' dear girl was perfectly willing to make
Q the arrangement, only we quarrelled a.
bout the amount Nlimony | should allow
!, her, and this unfortunate difference ofO
!, pihion broke off the negotiation. She
very kindly proposed to take the charge
of my whole estate, allowing me three
A hundred year out oft for my support
That arrangement thought would be i'm
! posing too great burthen on my 'lady
Il lover SO, to show my liberalify and fore
: thought, as kind and considerate hus
, band, proposed to keep the estate my
q self, and allow her The three hundred pei
4 annum! This was the nearest we came
!. TO an agreement
It Ihad noticed for some time the very
:. asSiduous attentions which a tai, be"hl'
kered feIIow-who called himself irienC
h of the family continued 10 bestow on
|. Mrs. ButterbaA. noticed, too, that Ga
briela received them very gracicusy
and took good care not TO throw any i'm
d pediment in The way Of the indulgence
|. of their harmless amussments. They
/. rode together, walked together, sang to
"a ge,her. and danced together, until hat
Q little difficulty in guessing the probable
/. consequences Of their plaIonic intimacy
7, 'The gentleman was very polite ant
y friendly whenever we met, and Gabrielle
y began 10 be much moro courteous and al
e. fable in her bearing toward me than sh'
III had been before her intimacy with 'th'
IN friend of The family was not so bln'
as they imagined, though it was my cu'
Al Lnt