The Rhode-Island Republican. [volume] (Newport, R.I.) 1809-1841, 1835-11-25

of' Order! order from erery part of the table. I
A grey squirrel then arose, scratching from his
y face the crumbs of pastry which had smothered him
in meat-pie, and wipng his eyes with the end of
his tail, spoke to the following purpose =" Mr.
Moderator, rs my friend the Black Duck says this
, is time for action. We ought not to spend our
time IN nibbDg about the nutshell, but strike at
once into the meat and kernel of the matter Now
regret thHt any gentleman of this assembly should
indulge IN persOnaliiies.-Ihis is no place for pr-
yat> pques and party politics. Let ducks and geese
20 amicably claw in claw, and paddle onward 10
the accomplishment of the great purpose. Allow
me still to remark that the proposition Of INV res.
pected friend the gander IL in my opinion hardly
suitable to the present emergency. hope that gen
temen will display bis customary wisdom and with
draw lis motion" Here loud nurmms arose from all
Meg0Ose tribe, and cries Of" Qutsien! question r'1
! sucking pig then took the floor. at, IS the
opinion" said he, " Of many of my learned friends.
that we should use our endeavors to convert. the
Govemor and Council into Jews for them" added
he-wiL great feeling" comes the day of deliver
ance for the swinsh multitade.-Under the Jewish
dispenSation, IT the abomnation of Thanksgiving
were continued, which very much doubt, it would
at least be attended with prohibition of pork in
all shapes, on that day. l PROPOSE therefore, to
bring hrward motion for the conversion of the a.
aforementioned dignares, in the first place. and the
Board Of Aldermen afterward."
An oyster, who had hitherto remained snug and
silent, now begged the indulgence Of the assembly |
lie hoped to SIZE something done for she-fsh. The |
epicures of Thanksgiving Day had grown so absorb
ingly greedy that oyster-saucc had become stand
ing dish. The liberty Of the was no longer in
violate. Ii was with the deepest melancholy that
he informed the assembly had it from the best a,l-
thory that the city authorities had recently rescin-
dcd an ordinance prohibiting the sale Of oysters du-
ring certain months of the year. No day of the |.
three hundred and sxty-Gvc," continued he, with
great emotion, " is day of rest for us."--Ic was
at some length, in the strain, when
he was called TO order by sleeps head, and re-
minded that he was DEPRESSING. violent atcrca-
ion cnsued between the two members, and several
hard words passed from another. The oys-
er told the sleeps head to give him none of his Jaw
which the sleeps head retortcd by desiring the oys-
cr TO shut up his clam-shclI.
Order being at length restored, the Moderator
,0ed upon the Standing Committee to report their
proceedings since the last anniversary meeting A
grey goose, whom found to be Chairman of the
committee, then rose and read report, stating that
since they had the honor of sitting upon this I'M
'ortan business, various. circumstances had arisen
u afford the most pleasing cncouragcments TO the
of the great cntcrprzc IN land. "OfI !
ate years, the report went on 10 say the dis
,rdcr known by the name of dyspepsia had increas-
ID to remarkable degree, as TO cause great n
arm among all people, both in town and country d
md the aforesaid complaint was well known to be il
\
able. They had therefore the pleasure of Inform
ng the meeting that there were not only Temper
nee Societies without number in the land but that u
meats well drink, had now fallen under the ban Il
# the big wigs, and that there had actually been IL
proposed in the a-consuming, all-devouring city of :,
'oston, an association entitled the Society for the
suppression of Eating."-l Most orerpon"ring thn'-
ers Of applause from ecery part of the table. d
The report having been read and accepted, and a
nc thanks of the meeting being presented TO the I,
committee for their mertorious services, the follow
10 resolutions proposed aud carried con. .
Resolced, That Thanksgiving Day is grievance l'
lot to be borne, d
Resoiced, That the Society for the Suppression ii
f Eating has our most sincere and hearty good h,
fishes for its success
ResOiced, That each and every mosnber of this g
sscmbly, whether turkey fowl, duck teal, pigeon,
oot cas head, oyster, sucking pig, lobster plum hi
uddlng, appe-dumpling, cranbcrry-tart, minced o,
les, pumpkin-pcs, custard, or cream-cako, pledge e.
imself, herself and themselves, Jointly and scyeray,
proceed forthwith, on the night of each Thanks 'e
wing Day, and SIT, with overpowering weight like &c
nto milestone, upon the conscience and stomach w
f the Governor of Massachusetts, the members of sl
nc Executive Council, the Mayor of Boston, the +.
oard of Aldermen, and every individual whose ro-
,ndiy of the outward man showcth token of din P'
creating propcnsitygving unto all and singular gr
orcnamed, perennial fit of the nightmare until us
thanksgiving Day he abolished.-Rcsolvcd, more -;
yer, that every minister, who shall read the Gov
.nors Proclamation for Thanksgiving, be consid- '"
ed us coming within the above mentioned penalty. ir'
These resolutions being engrossed and put to
,,e the Moderator declared the meeting adjourned; nc
hen mcthought the whole table burst into confu nc
geese, pudding, pies, all began to =,
,nce about like mad, and cali's head jumped up ="
om a pewter dish, and gave me sharp bite by III
C ear. ou
l nwoke, and found the sermon done, and people TIN
,ing out of church. A waggish boy, passing by, On
listed me by the ear, and reused me from my dream
1t for this should have suffered the greatest ca VI
strophe which can beie knight Of the trencher OF
that of losing his dinner Thanksgiving Day for
all