South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1835-09-26

ScUCc was uuTutH 10 me USE udppy
smiles discomforted me, 81 her cheerful
tones went ID my heart Iik a reptoach.
From that day her presence vas a
curse to me ; not that loved her less,
nor that she had changed-but how
could | stand before her, periuredas l
was, and she not doubling my iNno-
cence how could |, without feeling the
keenest pangs of remorse 7 A thous.
and times that forenoon did Iresolve
to seek MY friend and return him tn.
ticket, and as often break them. Con.
science smote heavily. But the prizs,
thought l, would check it. Fool that
I was, 10 think that paltry gold would
reconcile an offended God would buy
off punishment The lottery was
drawn tina. afternoon. That evening
| sat alone with my wife in her room.
She talked of the folly of men, in mol
being contented with what they posses
sed. s. for being ever in search OF more.
"How many hearts have been agitated,
wound up to the highest pitch, this
evening, in hopes Of drawing prize"
said she. What could 1 do! / was
there, and had to listen, although each
word seemed like a burning coal at my
heart. She continued, "and how ma
ny have spent that which should have
gone for bread and clothing for their
families--and for whatl A piece of
colored paper! And think you, my
husband, there have been no vows
violated--no oalhs broken this after.
noon r. Heavens, how this tortured
me! | made no ans wer, aud she pro.
ceeded; "If there are any such and
if they have been unfortunate, how
keen must be their disappointment, and
how doubly keen their remorse !! Are
you not, David, better pleased with
not buying ticke,s-allowing you had
not pledged your oath so touch not,
handle not, the forbidden thing
you would have been, had you gained
money by itf" Thus did Amanda
talk to me, as though | was as pure
and gailtless as herself. Innocent one!
she knew not that that very moment
her words were like daggers 10 my
sI@urt---rtsar at e~erJ .et'sn of ~. s.r~'
my soul wrilhed in agony; she knew
not that my pocket book was cram.
med with the tickets blank tickets :!
And when she poured out her soul in
prayer that night, she knew not that he
for whom she so devoutly prayed, dar.
ed not to listen to her words but shut
his ears. So il was. y
$40, my husband, stay a, home one
eveningthis week you shall read to
me, or [ will read to you Z; come, keep
me company this evening"" Thus
spoke my wife as she took me a6ec-
tionately by the hand one evening, a
tear at the same time filling her eye.
Brute that was shook her off re-
puisiyely, scarcely deigning her reply
as | wen, out. | was an altered man /;
my innocence had departed from me !;
| had perured myself. Having once
broken my oath, | still continued to
break it. Not a lottery was drawn but
| had some chance 10 it. Ill luck at.
tended me-blauks were my portion.
Sill kept on. Most Of my hours were
spent in lottery houses; | neglected
my business debts accumulated want
came upon me land | had nothing to
satisfy them with but hope-a hope
that at the next drawing 1 should be
lucky. AS cares increased, went to
the tavern for relief. Remorse gnawed
at my heart like a worm. 1t had
drank up all my happiness. When l
broke my oath, | thought gold would
still my conscience. Gold I had none,
so | attempted to ease it by strong
drink. Rum burnt my tender feelings,
my better nature !; but it only added to
the quenchless FIRE that was raging at
my heart. 1t was not uncommon for
me at this stage to get intoxicated eve
ry night. Oft have staggered home
to my patient, dying Amanda, for my
conduct was making sad inroads upon
a constitution naturally delicate, and
without shadow Of cause began 10 a.
buse her. Merciful God /! forgive me.
What insult and misery has that wo-
man not endured ! and all brought on
by me, her husband, her protector
About this time our child died.
dare not think of his death, how it was
brought on ! The poor child might
have lived longer-perhaps he might
but ne complained OF being cold, for
want of clothes; and sometimes his
cry for bread was in vain. It was 9
great shock to my wife /; and her grad
uel failing day by day, sobered me and
made me thoughtful. Blu, what had !