South Branch intelligencer. [volume] (Romney, Va. [W. Va.]) 1830-1896, 1835-09-12

'Asingle noggin y returned the farmer;
mo, didn't say nothing about | said she
didn't find single poker in them =
'Poker!'
sAy; louss.' So Mister think can't
employ you in that business.
DO YOU take me for louise catcher !?
said the phrenologist.
'Sartinly, man: what else replied the
farmer honestly, didn't you offer to exam.
inc the childrens heads3 And if it was
not to rid them Of varmin don't know
what it should be-
'Pm man ofscience,' said the tfyael.
Ter elevating himselfin very dignified
manner Pm phrenologist. and my hu-
siness is TO benefit mankind; especially
the rising generation, by informing them
what they are particularly designated for
by nature?
How can you tell Mister, if | may ak
the question:
by examng their heads, and ascer-
tanning the development Of their organs.
'Noggins, has said the farmer wife
will you bring the noggin here, and let
the gentleman oxamine it 2
You don't understand me- said the
phrenologist, mean the organs of The
head; the protuberance, the bumps as
some vulgar people call thom. / exam
inc them at fifty cents head when ltake
the whole family.
And what good does 1t do after ALL
why, it will inform you what to make
of your children, whether farmers, law
yers, doctors, mechanicks. or what not
Pm at no loss about that now, Mister,
all my boys take to farming as naturally
as the water to ruaning down steep
Hill.
But only consider said tho phrenolo.
gist if you should happen to be mistaken
now as to the indirectlon of nature, and
should put your children TO the wrong
employment, why then.
The wrong nonsense !. said the farmer,
beginning to DO impatient, 1 don't want no
vagabond like you, to teach me what to
do with my children.
Vagabond sir :! exclaimed the phrenol-
ogist, starting to his feet. Consider what
you say Or,
Il considered before sold il, return
ed the farmer, coolly, 'and if you don't
want more bumps than you've got now
on your hsad, you'll make tracks pref
~ nilnbly can tell you'll don't en-
courage any yagabonds of any descrip-
ton whatsomever. My wife can look
after tie children's heads; and as for
what they are cut out for, that's our
look out not s,rapges's,-And so the
sooner you take up your walking pa
pers the better
The travelling phrenologist had no.
the least desire for new bump; espe-
cially such as the farmer threatened to
make and so he took the advice Of the
latter, and walked on.-M Y. Tarns.
sszAs
Excerpts from the Louisville journal.
A writer in the Globe, supposed to
be Amos Kendall, thinks that, Zine
wings are riding the White hobby to
DEATH" We should dislike to sea the
gaunt figure of Amos bestriding
White hobby. IL would be Death on
the White horse
The Editor of The West Chester
Herald thinks, that, when we NEEDLE
with him, 'we get the wrong pig by
ear.' 1t matters mol, all pigs are alike
10 US.
The Pennsylvania Standard is for
war. The Editor says: III the wings
dare resort to violence, fifty thousand,
democratic bayonets will brislls in de.
fence of the President and the Constitu.
ton. All that is unnecessary. Cannot
The Jackson porkers 'bristts' without
the aid of bayona.sf
The Boston Galaxy says, that Isaac
Hill is President Jackson's Anoin,ed.'
True-& Gen. Upllaa was the priest,
who officialed at the ceremony of a.
Monument. He set poor Isaac TO dan
cling by anointing him with the ois Of
hickory. -
The Eastern Argus exclaims-sWho
is the present father Of the mongrel
party-Mr. Clay, MIR. Webster, or
Judge White p Neither. Col. Johnson
10 the father OF the mongrels.
One ofthe Arkansas papers enquiries
pertly-'Do they never hang villains in
Kentuckyf' Not often--we send them
to Arkansas.
10 Smith, the Mormon prophet has
bought three mummies, and has dis
covered that they are the bodies of Jo-
sepb, (,he son OF Abraham and King
Abimeleck and his daughler.-They
are now carr wing them about the COINS