The Arkansas advocate., 1834-07-04


 heeced in the sum ofa thousand or two dol. lars for the hen'ous offence of thoughtlessIy warbling perhaps in the ear of some artful maiden tie ;;fss,eaE:nss expression exp of" How much love thee"-whieh by the Gothic code ot this un-chivalrous age is now con- strted by our modern Mansfelds and Broughams into an actual breach of mar raage promise ifnot immediately followed by the consecutive celebration Of the wedding nuptials.
 < We know full well that fIymen would re- verse these arbitrary and rigorous decisions; for II he yiid not he may count on soof, seeing the vestal torch upon his altar for ever exilnguished. We are perfectly convinced there will be q reaction or rather ref,ac- tioa of the whole bachelor tribe into their solitary receptacles from which they will no more emerge than snail from his shell, I some countervailing measures are not pro- eeeded upon to put an effectual check to a growing evil, which if not arrested in time will have very disastrous influence in retar- ding the multiplication of our species and the settlement of our country. Wem re- collect what oceans of wilderness we have yet to be mown down and populated, and VIC must bear in mind also that the natural sensitiveness of celibacy will never endure the cruel eipunishment of being thus dragged up before public tribunal and paraded Tn the newspapers for Inc unpardonape crime of having glanced with rather too keen ali eye upon some fair maiden whom he had encountered in church or ball room, or in the purlieus of Broadway. It will never do. The ladies in general highly disapprove of this severity and are loud in their denun- ciations of those of their sex who would make use of these sub.eriuges as traps to ensnare the unwary.-N F. Ser. Lorenzo Doau.---In the life of this cele- brated personage, though there were many things 10 draw down upon him the sneers Of the world, there vas much to commend He was feeble in constitution, but enthusi- astic in the simple doctrines he taught.---# There were many who might smile ut hiss eceentrieities, while they respected his zeal and sincerity for he taught, like Fox and Wesley of old, what may be called the re- publieanism or democracy of the Christian creed, such as was preached by the humble fishermen and shepherds who followed it's great founder. His language was coarse and shrewd; but he knew how to touch upon the chord that vibrates to the common sense of every nlan's intelligence. Like other enthusiasts, after so many years of toil in which he often travelled from seven to ten thousand miles year, and preached from six to seven hundred sermons, he was himself without home, or scarcely means to exist; for he had followed what too many think shadows, and lost, therefore, the sub- stance. Necessity obliged him to peddle his tracts and pamphlets for Q livelihood. and drove him to the still more sordid and unpardonable offence of vending the nos- trums and compounds of enpiricism. [ib. Dialogue ih Court of justice. att torney In the case attempted to invalidate the testimony of tie witness, by declaring him to be too ignorant to be competent one said he to the judge, can convince your honor of the incompetency of the witness Ill very few moments; he has been reared in the country, has never been out of the sight of his fathers barn, never saw school house, and your honor permitting, l will propound few questions, and upon his answer your honor can decide.
 The Judge assenting, he turned to the witness and asked-who made you? Witness.---I don't know; Ireckon 1t was Attorney.-There, your honor, to tha satisfaction of yourself and tho jury, have proved the witness a non compos nentis, to-. tally unqualified to decide upon the serious nature of his cath
 Witness.- Now MT. Lawyer, may ask you one question: I've answered yours. Attorney.--A thousa.id, sir, a thousand if you please.
 Witness.-Who made youl Attorney-Why, don't know. reckon it was Aaron.
 Witness Burning to the iury)--Well now, ! have read in the good book, that Aaton made calf, but don't know how the darn'd fool got here.
 The Court was convulsed with laugh> ter.
 Effect of Oii on Wafer.-The following is secret worth knowing: In rough wealth. CT, they (,he fishermen of the Bosphor,lsy spread few drops of oil on the surface, which permits them to see clearly to great depth. 1 was aware that oii would calm the surface of the sea; but until recently did not know that 1t rendered objects more dis tinct beneath the surface. A trinket ofsome value had been dropped out of one ofthe up- per windows of our palace into the Bos. phorus; which, at this place, was ten. or twelve feet deep. It was so small, that dragging for it would have been perfectly useless, and 1t was accordingly given up for