Martinsburg gazette and public advertiser. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1826-1833, 1833-07-25


time and patience. Come forward Mr..
Harris and be sworn. So forward
come the witness, fat, shuffy looking
man, a slectle' corned, and took his
corporal oath with an air.
Chops.-Mr. Harris, we wish you
TO tell all about the riot that happened
the other day at Captain Rice's, and
as a good deal Of time has been alrea-
dy wasted in circumlocution, we wish
you to be compendiots, and at the
same time, as explicit as possible.
Enthusiastically giving the law
yer a knowing wink, at the same time
clearing his throat-Captain Rice, he
gin a treat, and cousin Sally billiard,
she came over to our house and axed
me if my wife she mout'nt go; | told
Sally Dilliardthat my wife was poorly,
being, as how she had touch of the
Rheumatics in the hip, and the big
swamp was in the road, and the big
swamp was up, for there had been a
heap of rain lately; but howsomever
as it was she, cousin Sally billiard,
my wife, she mout go. Well, cousin
Sally billiard then axed me if Nose,
he mout'nt go. | told cousin Sally
billiard, that Nose, he wa, the fore
man Of the crop and the crop was
smartly in the grass; but howsomever,
as it was she, cousin Sally billiard,
| Nose he mout go.
Chops.-ln the name Of common
sense, Mr.. Harris, what do you mean
by this rigmarole.
WitneSs.-Captain Rice he gin a
treat, and cousin Sally billiard, she
came over to our house and axed me
If my wife she mout'nt go; | told cou-
sin Sally billiard
Chops.--Stop, sir, if you please:
we don't want to hear any thing about
cousin Sally billiard and your wife
tell us about the fight at Rice's.
Witness.-Well | will sir if y GU let
me.
Chops.-Well, sir, go on.
Witness.-Well Captain Rice he
gin treat, cousin Sally billiard, she
came over to our house, and axed me
if my wife she mout'nt co.
Chops.--There tits again,-witness,
witness, please to stop.
Witness.-Well, sir, what do you
want!
Chops.-We want to know about
the fight, and you must not proceed in
this impairment story-do you know
any thing about the matter before the
court.
Witness.-To be sure do.
Chops.--Will you go on and tell it
and nothing else!
Witness.-Well, Captain Rice he
gin treat,-
Chops.--This is intolerable, may it
please the COURT move that he be
committed for q contemplate seems
to be tritling with the court.
Court.-Witness, you are now be-
fore a court of Justice, and unless you
behave yourself in a more becoming
manner, you will be sent to jail, so be-
gin and tell what you know about the
fight at Captain Rice's.
Witness, alarmed. )-Well gentle
men, Captain Rice, he gin a treat, and
| cousin Sally Billiard
Chops.-I hope that this witness
may be ordered into custody.
urt.-(alter celebrating. MIR.
Attorney, the court is of opinion that
we may save time by telling the wit
ness to go on in his own way. Pro.
coed Mr.. Harris, with your story, but
! stick to the point.
Witness.--Yes, gentlemen; well,
Capt. Rice, he gin treat, and cousin
/ Sally billiard she came over to our
house and axed me if my wife she
mout'nt go. told cousin Sally Dill
hard that my wife she was poorly, be
ing as how she had the Rheumatic in
the hip, and the big swamp was on the
road, and the big swamp was up; but
howsomevcr as it was she, cousin Sal
ly billiard, my wife, she mout go.
Well cousin Sally billiard then axed
me if Nose he mout go. told cousin
Sally billiard as how Nose, he was
the foreman of the crop, and the crop
was smartly in the grass; but howsom-
ever, as it was she, cousin Sally Dill.
lard, Nose he mout go. So they
goes on together, Nose, my wife and
cousin Sally billiard, and they comes
to the swamp, and the big swamp was
up as ] was telling you, but being as
how there was a log across the big
swamp, cousin Sally billiard and
Nose, like genteel folks they walked
the log, but my wife like a I'D
fool waded; and gentlemen that's the
height of what know about it.
Election Of a Mayor.-G. w. told