Martinsburg gazette. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1833-1855, 1833-11-14

whlskey, although they helped him TO
the destruction of no small quantity OF
beef, cabbage, and other matters, did
not in the least aid his stomach in
converting these things into good
chyle, for the support and nourishment
of his gentele mantry person. On the
contrary, they rather tended in the end
to render his complaint worse and
worse.
He next had recourse to all the root
doctors and doctresses, within fifty
miles. He took likewise all the patent
medicine he could hear of:--the pana-
ceas, the catholicons, and the infallible
specifics. He even took newspaper,
for the sole purpose of reading the ad-
vertisements Of the new and important
medicines, and the certificates of won.
derful cures done and performed thro'
tho agency thereof. But after all,
poor Sam, or gentleman Sam," as the
neighbors called him, had dyspepsery
| as bad as ever.
But though he most heartily hated
all study, and from his soul eschewed
/ reading, in general, he accidentally
derived one advantage from taking a
newspaper. In looking, as usual, for
infallible cures, his eye CHANGED to
meet with the following recipe, from a
paper "down east:
"Take OF. camphor, OF. myrrh
-pulverize and mix them together.
Then bore a hole in the upper end of
an axe helve, sufficient to contain the
mixture, which put in and stop close.
When this has stood "a hours in
warm place, it will be fit for use"
Such was the substance of the east
ern recipe. But the manner of using
it, Sam did not so much admire. 1t
was no other than this, namely, to get
up every morning before the sun and
use the axe--beginning moderately at
first, and increasing the exercise by
degrees, until the heat produced by the
hands of the patient should dissolve the
mixture within the helve; which oozing
through the wood should enter the pores
of the skin, and so diffuse itself through
his whole frame, adding new life and
vigor to his enervated constitution.
ga murrain take the work." said
Sam, s'if 'twasn't for that shouldn't
mind taking the medicine at all!''
He debated with himself for some
days what to resolve upon. Though
he disliked the mode of taking it, he
had full faith in the medicine, as he had
in all sorts ofnewspaper recipes. His
father advised him by all means to take
it; and so did the rest Of his acquaint-
ance. The neighbors wished above
all things to see "Gentleman Sam"
brought to labor again.
elf could only get the ingredient
into the pores of my hand without
chopping for it," said Sam, 81 shouldn't
care. But, howsomever, work or no
work, must take it, for am persuad-
| ed it's the only thing that'll cure me-"
He accordingly prepared him an
axe strictly in the manner prescribed,
not emitting to set it in warm place
twenty -four hours before using. His
father took care that the instrument
should be well ground; and that there
, should be no lack of materials to work
upon, assigned him an acre ofprimtive
forest, thickly covered with oaks,
beaches and naples, to be cut down
and wrought into fire wood.
e'Condemn it," said Sam, ashe reach
ed the thick and lofty wood, "this is
pretty business for gentleman! By
jumping Joseph, it's a good weeks
work to cut down one Of these trees,
to say nothing Of the chopping and
splitting it up. And tiIen what the
deuce has the ingrediences in the axe
helve to do with the chopping, should
like to know. But howsomever, as
said before, that's neither here nor
there; it's so set down in the news
print, and there's no disputing what
that says"
Sam pulled off his gentleman's coat,
and fell to. He worked according to
the recipe, with due degree of mode
ration at first; nevertheless, he soon
got out of breath, and was obliged to
slack away in order to recover his
wind. He took special care not TO let
90 of his axe for minute lest the han.
die should cool, and thereby he should
lose the benefit of what he bad already
done. Besides getting out OF breath,
his hands began to get sore, and nume-
rous blisters were seen elevating the
skin like puff-paste.
. "Consarn it all.'' said Sam, as he sal
. down on the log to rest, 'this is hard
medicine. I'd rather take three bushels
. ofthe bitterest roots and YARDS that ev.
v err grew. This work willkill me as sure
!. as I live. Imay as well die of the dis