Vandalia Whig and Illinois intelligencer. [volume] (Vandalia, Ill.) 1832-183?, 1832-08-15

shouldn't mind 1t no more than a. oat-straW."
"Well, sar, you offer to touch my mous::aehes
iand see if you don't get i.''
''Touch your mustychers! Why, I'd as ieves
touch two old chaws Of tobacker, that have jes
been spit out Touch'em, indeed! WIZ, Mis-
ter, wouldn't touch 'em with the tongs. CAM
conceive, for my life, what should induce any
human critter TO wear SIGH darned nasty looking
things as them"
NASTY looking! do you call 'em? Sar, you
have no taste. Nasty looking, indeed! Why
lsar, they are all the admiration of the ladies'
"Ladies! ha, ha, ha! Ladies! They must have
Ia queer notion any how. But there are some
women who are onaccountable fond of puppies
and sich-ike animals; and Pve seen 'em fonde
and kiss 'em, as if they were human critters
But, Lord! L don't see how any woman could
ever let her lips come within gun-shot of yourn.
Admiration of the adies!'
"Do you question wha, l say, sar?"
"Why, Mister, l don't know what kind of la
dies YOU have in the CITY here. But one thing L
can tell you-our country gals wouldn't 40 m re
let YOU touch EN- than they would toad they're
livery particular what comes IN contact with their
lips. But, Mister. how in the name of hair and
bristles do vnu eati How do Won 90 to work to
git the victuals n'n yolr mouth, with them are
the side of ditch! Do you eat meat and SIGH
likei or do YOU live upon spoon-victuals"
ats none of your business, sar, what i've
on board at seven dollars aweek; and ea-
what please. sar, and drink what please"
''Seven dollars a week! my gracious! we gil
board and washing, and all, in the country, for a
dollar and half But 'spose they charge you
FIVE dollars and half extra for them are mustv
cheers Faugh wouldn't have 'em at the table
for ten dollars"
"D-n it! what fool am to stand here talk
ing with fellow of your cloth" Thus saving.
the man with the moustaches fourisbed his dandy
switch, wheeled about, and walked on. He had
gone but few steps, when the Yankee bawed
after him
HnlIoa! Mster-Don't YOU want curry-
comb? I've got sore raal fine ones, with teeth
on both sides. They're hangup, can tell you"
Course your currvcombs! and you too"
"Don't swear, Mster-nor 60 off in passion.
meant no offence in what I've said. But /
must declare you're the darn'dest ugly looking
man in the face, ever see in all my life''
INTERESTING ANEcDoTE.-1t is frequently re-
marked that the most 'audable deeds are achieved
in the shades of retirement and to its truth history
testiies in every mage An act of heroism, or
philanthropy, performed in solitude, where no
undue feelings can affect the mind, or bias the
character is worth to the eve of impartial
observer, whole volumes of exploits displayed be
fore the gaze of stupid and admiring multitude.
II is not long since gentleman was travelling in
one ofthe counties of Virginia, and about the
close of the dav stopped at public house to obtain
refreshr,ent and spend the night. He had heen
there but short time before an old man alightec'
from his gig, with the apparent intention Of be
coming fellow guest with him at the same house
As the old man drove np he observed that both
shafts of his gig were broken, and tbat The! were
held together bv withs formed from the bark of
a hickory sapling Ourtraveller observed further
that he was plainly clad. that his knee buckles
were looseneG and that something like negligence
nervaded his Dress Conceiving him to be one off
the honest veomanrv of orr land, the conrtesies of
strangers passed between them, and they entered
the tavern It was about the same time an ad-
dition of three or four Young gentleman was made
to their number. most, if not all Of them of the
legal profession. As soon as thew became con-
veniently accommodated, the conversation was
turned by one Of the latter upon an eloquent
harangue which had that day been displayed at
he bar. 1t was replied bv another, that he had
witnessed the same day degree ofeloquence, no
doubt equal, hut that it was from the pulpit
Something like sarcastic reioinder was made to
the eoquence of the pulpit; and a warm and able
a'tercation ensued, inlwhich the merits of the
Christian religion became the subject of discus
sion From six O'Clock until eleven, the Young
champions welded the sword of argument, adj
ducing with ingenuity and ability every thing
that could he said prd and con. Daring this
nrotracted period the ola gentleman listened with
all the meekness and rpdesty Of child, a. ifhe
was adding new information to the stores Of his
mind; or perhaps he was observing with phi'os-
rphic eve the faculties Of the youthful mind, and
how new energies are developed by repeated
action; or perhaps, with patriotic emotion, he was
rafecting upon the future desinies ofhis country,
and on the rising generation upon whom those
l'lestnies must devolve; most probably, with a
sentiment Of moral and religions feeling, he was
I"nllecting an argument which, characteristic of
himseIG no art would be able to elude, and no
force resist Our traveller remained a spectator
nod took no part in what was said.
At last, one of the Young men remarking that
lit was impossible to combat with long and estab-
lished preiudices, wheeled around and with some
Familiarity exclaimed, "well nv old gentleman,
what think you of these things" IT, said the
traveller. a streak Of vivid lightning had at what
moment crossed the room, their amazement could
not have been greater than 1t was with that
ii,llowed The most ejouuent and unaQSWcrable