The Massachusetts spy. [volume] (Worcester [Mass.]) 1831-1858, 1832-09-12
From The .Ncrc York Constellation.



, all love you'll make no more noise with it,
, OTHEILu.
II is perlous undertaking to attemp, tc
settle differences between man and wife. as
many well-meaning umpire has found "a
ms cost. Instead, therefore, of expressing
our individual opinion, in relation to the
grievances recorded in The following let.
tiers, we take the safer course of laVino
them before the public. Besides the tIcn-
tty OF surname, in the signatures, the epis-
Ties are evidently the productions Of TWO
persons, who, whatever may he their lar
iings IN musical taste, are cohjugally Of
" one flesh"
MR.. EDIToR,-When counting nv dear
vile, that now is, used 10 praise her mn-
SIC, both vocal and instrumental and be-
ileVe went so far as-to declare she sang
like an angel. But assure YOU il was all
out OF mere compliment, and had no idea
hul she would take il as such. But think
OF my CONSERVATION, when the very next
DAY after we were married. she asked me
10 get her piano. ] endeavorcd 10 smile
a; The request, and told her, that her music
delighted me above all things but that.
now she was married, she would find SO ma
ny interesting things to attend to, that she
would have no time to devote to music
But all my arguments were of no avail
have piano she must, and have piano she
would. | was obliged to comply, of course,
yon know fol one to quarrel with ones
dear wife SO soon after one is married,
would be very shocking
Like good and gentle husband. there
lore, | purchased the piano-hopinr at all
events, that my wife would not be so unrea-
SODable AS tnaka :.
But alas how was disappointed II was
no sooner brought home and placed in one
corner Of the parlor, than she began TO
ihump, thump- s,rum--bawl and
squat, from morning till night and nearly
from night till morning again, for she would
insist upon playing after was in bed.
And then only think of the money it costs
for new music. Every song, rondo, catch.
glee, and the - knows what, that is adj
vertised and puffed in the newspapers, she
must have. Every day she begs money Of
me for the purchase of some piece of music.
But that is not the worst of it: would will
ingly pay the expense Of all the music that
has been invented since the days of Orphe-
US if she would only be SO reasonable as new
ell to attempt playing it.
If manifest any WEAKNESS at her thump-
ing and stunning, she complains that |
have no ear for music, and that am strange
ly altered from what was previous to mar
riage. And then she puts her handkerchief
to i.cr eye; and then | protest love mu-
sic of all things, but-And here, Mr.. Editor,
usually stop for the sake Of peace and qui-
etness. have now been married the great
er part Of year, and during all that time
the humping, the strummng and squaling
has continued. have now no hopes, ex-
cent in the counter music of Il family of
children. Yours, in trhuaton,
THos. TYMPANUM
Mr.. EDIroR.--I take the liberty of Law
ing my S'~i~Vy~sasaN L4FOrc you, III hopes you
will pint out some mode of undressing them.
am married ,cumman and therefore
ought by good rites to be happy one. But
d-idSS am the most miserable preacher in
existence. And what do you think 1t all
springs from ? .Muzic-nothng in the world
but muzic! Would you believe it ? my hus-
band has no ear for muzic! Had known |
this beforehand, never would have mar
ried him till the day of pancakes. But
was deceived by his .fatteys. When he
come counting, he had used to confess the
most extravagant admiration of my singing
and playing on the peanner He said my
muzic was angelic, and thathe was erecu-
tiuely fond Of it. But l think twas all no
such thing. I've reason to believe he never
had no ear for mu=ic-and that all his con-
fesslons was mere sham, done only to
make an impression on my hart. Would
you believe it :? he has the Oddacity to think
because Pm married, that ought TO attend
to household dutys. Was there ever such
thing heerd of? Imean in modern times
| hdvn't been married year yet, and he
thinks ought to turn my hands to some
thing else besides the peGnner-when the
truth is, Mr.. Editor, I don't play above six
or seven ours day at most. Of what ytSe
is a 1cumman's nollege, if she can't make
J any yuse Of it. My father and mother, dear
good .foar, took great deal Of panes in
having me taught the peanner, and singing,
and all that. And now my husband, be
takes it into his head, as it were, to moll2ty
and reetOe all my kind parents has done. |
don't wish to quarrel with him, or TO set up
my will against hiSn. But don't you think,
Mr.. Editor, | ought to insert my Preroga-
tive? If we wives give way in one thing,
we may in another-and there's no know
ing where it will eend. From harmony,
from heavenly HARMONY" says Shakespeer,
"this universal form began" and I'm deter
mined to stick to my mlt-ic as long as
have the yuse of my fingers or my fung =
wouldn't You, Mr.. Editor, fyou was i'll my
place? TABITHA TYMPANUM.
| p. S. should have writ something more
but my husband has just this moment
come in, and therefore | must wind off, TO
play him chune. He hattered my muzic
before he married me, and he shall have
- ears full of it now. T. II.
LONDON SquIBs EDITORIAL. The follow ing
extracts are from pungent miscellany called
- Punch in London p
Cdrus WdsOn This gentleman, better
known as the tall attorney, was stopped the
other day by an Irish lad, who looking up in
his face, asked, {" Is il cOd up there - Lord
Tenterden said, she should have followed his
profession in Scotland, where he would have
heen an admirable plender in the High Court Of
Judiciary
! 4rgumsnium ad Hominem. The Duke o.
Gloucester lately being in conversation will
Lord Brorgham on the subject of Reform grew
so warm in the argument, that he observed
hastily, the Chancellor was rery near a fOoi
Brougham replied, that he could not think o
contradcting the Duke, ana declared that h,
fully saw the force of his Royal lIighncss'
position.
Two boys, one of them blind Of an eve, wcrt
discourslng on the merits of their rcspectv,
masters. How many hours do you get lo
a. s.-I.s