Virginia free press & farmers' repository. [volume] (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1827-1832, 1831-08-11
From ll.c naliimorc Minerva.

/. -. taLrttc.
From tl,c Baltimore Minerva
JoNAriIAN'S "TRIP ON THE RAILROAD.
Dear Cousin Joc-Ihis comes hon.
ing YOU are we'll. being as well as
might be expected. considerin' all
things. tell YOU, I've madden lam
time on Il ever since I've been down
IN these ere parts, and when I get
home I've gotten oceans o. things To
tell you and cousin Patience, who.
guess, Is little sort u particular a.
bout inquiry after me. tell YOU what,
I've been on the Tai, road-it's a ma.
ton strange Sort o thing. and, NAV be
It don't take the rag Of u the bush. !
tell you. But guess YOU want TO
have the whole o the particulars, 80
III give 'em To you.
In the first place, to come straight
TO the point-you remember uncle Alb
ncr's old OK team that u.ed To take the
folks 10 meeting on Sahbn' day when
they were too lazy to walk : Well
now, III tell you. a railroad car is
nothing like that, fer the wheels ain,
so bic by 4 lorg shot, and they turn
around as quick as old ma'am Abigail'S
spinning wheel, and quicker too, !
know. So ] gets into one cf them 'ere
cars and seats myself so as how could
get pretty sleek observation Of all
what vas going on. 'You can't sit
there. mister said man what APP
peared to be somebody on the con.
Germ.
Il guess as how | GOT this ere seat
first, says |, and I've as good right
TO il as nobody
But you must give il up says he,
for here are some ladies who prefer
having it.
Now, thinks /, cousin Patience
might be some day or other IN the
same predicamcnt. so | bundles OUT.
aud takes a seat upon the upper deck.
] swow. il was the best after all. and
the nation fools lost little more than
nothing BY their bargain.
I've seen oceans ~ strange things
in my time. Joe. / teII you, but let me
be trOb 10 pan. cake in deacon James
hog pen, if ever saw nothing like a
railroad. Didn't we streak it? !
tell YOU as how we did. AZ first we
went OIL slow, slow, and then, snig-
gers! how the Greater did shin il along
a streak o lightning couldn't hold a
candle 10 IL, and as uncle Abncr used
to say when he was telling his rigma-
roles about Cape Cod and all the IN sort
~ places, we cut the wind so that il
took nine men to hold one MAPS hal,
down. But. nation. how do YOU think
we went SO fast:--we had no horses.
oxen, or mules--wc went without a
single creator being harnesscd TO the
car, excepting thing which made a
noise something almost like the steam
boat what we saw when We were down
TO New.York. But. tell you what.
Joe, ] didn't like the smoke uhat came
out oI the chimney; il made my white
| trOW scrs as black as u guinea niger,
and blackcr too, a. much blacker o.
Ben IIoodman's character ~ Llackcr
than mine. Didn't the ladies get st.
tell you: | calculate they lad ma
clothes to 20 10 church with on Sun.
day: however it Is all good for the
I Wd~Nfi NuUtNs
There was a little man what 30, On
my right hand side. who seemed Ia
Know something about ihirgs IL gene.
raj. for his tongue went about - fas'
IL the clappcrs Of uncle Ahncr's gris'
mil. when ~ gotten no gri-t IN o.
lie had mighty big PAIR Of green spfc'
upon hls nose, Which looked pretty
much like deacon Jones saddle baas.
and likcr too, Tor they were all - one
side. he left eye beng "a blind a. a
mill stone. lie told mc all about lhe
particulars C the great battle 81 thc
Patapsoo. which WAS fought q short
time ago between the regular mili;.a
aud the workmen on tie road. que
it would make you open yuur e,e.. n
you was g. hear lhe whole of the -tnr,i
how soms'cr. Ill put hat "a 'tl yet
home. Seven hundred and ffty two
men we're Killed, and ten ihuu.end
were taken prisoners by ttc 20 iefs.
NV. tell yol what, iais j. Nhat
all dong lfa -iucs- 0u iaree scale
q vas rat hg'''ing, aud ju-l Ike the