Phenix gazette. [volume] (Alexandria [D.C.]) 1825-1833, 1831-10-08
A DINNER AT THE 'sQUIRE's


10 lively Irish narrative. Our readers cannot
have forgotten the tale Of the GridlrOn; and they
Will equally long remember the history of Paul
Doherty's dinner at Squire Beamton's. Paul &C
cortns to our authority Zone of our late papers)
was formerly dweIler in Cork, where he follow
ed the business Of a manufacturer of snuff and
tobacco, having turned TO that trade when he had
become too far advanced in life to follow his for
mer profession Of " teacher of dancing and all
other kinds Of music; wherein he had acquired
good store Of celebrity.
g He was plain, hon,ey man, rather large in
MS person. very oddly dressed, and so welded to
old times and old habits. that 1t was impossible to
ret him to look like Christian, as poor Mrs.
Doherty used to say--rcst her soul IN glory
when she would wish him to lay aside his pushed
WIG. his old rufiles, and his three-cornered hat,
all of which contributed. IN no small degree, to
the grotesqueness of his appearance. But these
little oddities had pleasing associations tor Mr..
Doherty's recolcctions, as he put them on rellgi-
uusy every DAY, and seated himself every morn
ing on the pipe chest facing his shop door hum
ming Nora Crcena,' in pleasing. droneke un-
der growl. while he kept time with his heels swing
ing against the side Of the chest, as they hung
down. but did not reach the flags of the shop door.
Mrs. Doher,y, good soul, minded the shop. scOld-
ed the kitchen-w ench, abused the cowboy. mend
died the stuckmgs-and, in short, did every thing
else she could to please Mr.. Doherty, who scarce
w minded any thing but his corns when the GUS
TONERS came in. One forenoon. as Paul was seat.
ed on his favorte chest and Mrs. Doherty was
washing up the breakfast table in little < 10, J.
hole off the shop. tall, fashionable, elderly gen
,le,nan came in. and asked to see Mr.. DOherty.
Well, Sur, says Paul, stopping short his tune OF
Nora Greene With sudden grunt, as he turned
lis head SIDEWAYS aud cooked his eye at the new
cu-tUiaer,-'a nd so YOU want to see Misther 10
herty. Su':' Yes was the reply. Its like
YOU don't know him.: continued Paul. Il have
not that pleasure yet replied the stranger
Pleasure! aisy. now. pleasure. achwidth: sure
isn't it myself you're spanking to. all the timer
Are you Mr.. Doherty, thens' 'Falks an sure
am. barring was changed at nurse lin very
happy to see YOU, Mr.. Doherty--my name is Beam
toni live on the Parade
Paul-l'm proud Of it; it's often heard tell
of you: and know YOU are come OF mls hty grand
people inrely; but may be so bowd as to ak
you what business you have wud your humble SER
ylnt?
Mr.. Beamton-business: oh, none in the world.
have ONLY come to pay my respects to you.
am under many compliments to a son OF yours
whom met IN Paris.
Paul-Yuu did not, indeed, Sur-'tis impos-
sible: he is in France at present
Mr.. Beamton Well, well, it makes no differ
ence-its all the same.
Paul.-How the puck could it be the same, Sur,
Faith. / beg your pardon-you're quite mistaken
--haveu't Toms JOG. graphy, and isn't Paris at
the foot of the Kinnary Islands, at the back OF
the Gulf of Mexico, while France is small VII
lase in the Island of MEDITERRANEAN, in the sea OF
Marimachi in South America? Uu, wow. maybe
-. t,n ha,, latit Ftpr tray
way from Brustil to Wathurfurd.
Mr. Beamton-Well, We won't fall out about
that; but at all events, have you not a son named
Tom?
Paul-By my faith have; that's his name sure
Mr.. Beamton-Well, met him abroad, where
he saved nv life, and was 50 kind and attentive
to ME that wish to return the compliment to you
in any way that lies in my power.
Paul-And so YOU saw Tom, Sur, abroad?-
aside Arrah, Betty. throw by them kimmeens
and come spake to the jontleman; sure he seen
Tom abroad. Is Tom as fat as he was whin he
went, sur?
Mr.. Beamtou--I don't know. did not see him
before; but he looks remarkably well at present.
Pau-I'll be bound Tom was axing you good
deal about the craft Of potatoes that he finished
before he whit?
MIR. Beamton-I can't say he was; it was as
my physician that he attended me-
Paul-Tom's clever chap, Sur: he'd pick up
any thing Here, Betty, dust that chair and
let the jontleman sit down. Sit down, surms't
down; aud so Toms getting usty, SURF Dye
think he'll fall into flesh? He takes after the mo-
TIERS side.
Mr. observation-disclosures me for not sitting down
my time is limited | should be delighted TO
tell you all about yonr son, and will be able TO
give you good deal Of pleasing news of him, If
You will do me the favour of dining with me to-
day. =, ,,,
Paul-Troth, Sur, an to be plain with you, I'd
rather dine at home.
Mr.. Beamton-Oh, Mr.. Doherty, you shall
make Yourself quite at home with me. Pom my
honour YOU shall-you must come.
Paul-What time do you dine, Surf
Mr.. Beamton-At six O'Clock.
Psul-Oh, couldn't 60, Sur I'D never