Phenix gazette. [volume] (Alexandria [D.C.]) 1825-1833, 1830-01-28


Mr. Nicholas Tubbs appeared before The Com
m,ssionets upon a sun,m"ns 10 show cause
why he refused or neglected 10 pay tor sum OF
81. IFS Cd being the b1l,noe Of an account al
legged 20 he due from him to Miss Julia Stat.
terry, of which sccoun, he following is a true
copy, as i, was handed into Cour, on behalf 81
the plaintiff:
.tMr Tubhs toe Miss Slsttery.
1929 Jenwary toe Joon six munth a. -.
in Strueshun toe Miss rubbs o
Dedukt cash and cd thing 3
baans still doc III 6
The Court, taking the singular or'hography
Of Miss SIairer,'s account Into consideration,
asked her wha, kind Of ius,ruc ion" she had
given Miss Tubs?
Oh dear!' said Miss Slauery, finishing
instruction Of course. am peculiar sorry To
say tha, Miss Tubbs' education has been neg
leclrd shameful through the prrspcuity Of her
father, Mr. Tubbs here; and by her mama's
desire I gave her the COO de grace " -
The Cowt-That was finishing her with a
vengeance! You don't mean 10 say you kiIrd
her!
"Heasens above! what an orribie idea"
shrieked Miss Slaltery Ne kill her! Oh
dear! No indeed! never qussiiculated such
thing "
The Court- What did you mean Madam, by
saying you had given her he coup de grace
Why, OF course, gave her the grace" re-
piled Miss Slattery. All the grace she has
got from me; TO- Miss Tubbs, poor thing. had
been SO sham.fuIy pu, ahou, that she moo no.
thing But by my superior in'uitions, and br-
ing herself EXTERN seditious in lsarning, size is
now 6. for any company. for h.ve gave her a
in tha I,nat her i'm nt
(ourrv qindriAe) and in the Yescusciiatioa Of her
lingering; ard it,"
The Courf-WeI, Mr. Tubs, yca hear what
the lady ays-and perhaps you understand her
better ,han we do VIVA, have YOU % say
why we should not order you TO pay The claim?
Mr.. T.6bs-Why, I've go, TO say as his:-
Who employed she TO be meddllng aud max
ing with my Jsrtei?
Miss Sdffsyy Who employed me: was not
employed i was engaged Tubbs; and was
engaged by your wife, who has more sense IN
her ,humbpail than you have in your whole
bodv-Tubbs!
Mr.. 2ubbs: Very good and now your vor-
ships III j,. lake and tell you all about it,
My wife says 20 me. Tubbs, SAYS she, what
do you think! don't know says I. Why,
says she, there's nice old lady up in Mrs
Davis's two pair front, wo,'s took = melton 10
our Bridget That's my dater. your wor'hips
Wrll says /, and what Of that? for keep a
coal shsd. your wolshps, and does Irar in
SILT FISH and green grocery besides. why,
saws my wife, says she, you know, Tubbs,
Br,dget's big wench now; and il you'll let
he Id lady finish her up bit in dancing and
pannyforting, shr'll take i, OUT in Goals and
wrs,tybles; says my wife 10 me-jusr So
And with that. ] says To my wife says, u
Shut your po,atoe trap. Mrs. Iubbs, says I;
ard you mind your business, anc let Bridge
mind he shop; for III have no such tithrry.
humming and gaIhavanting, can and dc as
sure you, Mrs. Tubbs, says l. No, bu'
rubbs, says she Don't rubbs me, says ],
III have no more words about it--and
with that, hought j, were oil dropped,
ill one morning as were gering ou, Of brd.
sees my wife's pock-r hanging out from un
deI her end Of thr bolster, and out OF The slit
of he pocket this here not were sticking:-
No'e handed into court aid read by tbs rlerk:
Mis-, J. Sla',ery's compliments 10 Mrs. and
Miss TuSbses, and reques's The honor oftheir
COMPANY to quadria party on Friday evening.
Mr.. Tubs in continuation Blow mr. your
worships, Il You might MOI have knocked me-
down with feather, you might indeed So
crumpies up the mole. and drops il into my
wife's mouth for she had got an ugly khack OF
sleeping viii her mouth wide open, You'll IN
dersrand; and whips or my things and down
stairs ! crreps leaving her fast asleep with The
no e in her mouth; and off | goes to marke, 20
buy nay green stuff aud six sacks Of white eyed
po'a,ots-"
Here he conrt cut short Mr.. Tubs narrative
by peremp,orily ordering MIN to state why he
objected topay
Why because laid nem6argo upon it,"
replied Mr. Tubbs. sem hrr word, time af-
ter time if she quadrilIed my Bridget woul'nt
be answerabIr: quarrelIed VITA Mrs. rubbs;
and wers everlasting blowing up Bridget
But wha can one do agen three women! II
were all Of no use; say whatI would, do what
could. my Goals, cash, and ,urnips were clan
destinnted out Of my house to pay for qpadrii
ling, and verify believe they d have drilled me
Into guod, ifI had not put Sop 80 d ny pack
ing Bridge off % her uocle's at Nor hampton.
Evidence was then called 10 prove that he
had repe atedly given Mis- Slauery notice that
that he would not be suswerable; and 81 course
she was non suiied."
Whiskey, Cordage, &c.
~ hogsheads R,It;more wbi.key ~ ,g.s