Martinsburg gazette and public advertiser. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1826-1833, 1830-04-15

Z
tGroesne :Stiy--Gur readers are uHfuos-
tAonsbly aware that stories onetmes increase
with astonishing rapidly, and that a mighty
growth OF the marvellous may I'm short tne'
arse from an exceedingly small -begiuning.-
But as all may not DO acquainted with the
precise mode OF culture, which will brinS
them forward with more than the Eaplcny OF
-Cucumbers in q hot7house, we hope they will
feel themselves highly obliged to us for endea-
NerBg 60 enlightea them tbs matter; end
30 show os- disposition TO serve ttsIn 10 so
important particular. we subioin the follow
ing specimens:
"Hare you beard" said Mrs. Virgins,
-S,tbat Matthew NJ Muzzle aIsd his wAie have
Fallen out2"
$40, have not" said Mise. Spriggins.-s.
-"bYell, us as trus.as you're alive, - said Mrs
5Wiggins, laying her finger beside her nose
/ Ia token OF silence.
Mn Spriggius lost no time III calling upon
her neigbbor Higgins "flave YOU heard"
-said she, that Matthew DC Muzzel and his
-sife had falien outlof Leds" ''ENo, hare Dot, !"
replied Mrs. Higgins, "Well, It's true as I'm
here" returned Mrs. Sprigslns, ''for just
had it from Mrs. Virgins And she Ike
,svise put her finger beside her nose IN token
that it was not matter for every body to
know
mrs. I1tEEIDS WeDt uFtCuY " hCI beiEfbOi
Higgins, and before she had fairly recovered
breath, began: "hare you hsard that Mat
thew McAiuzzel ard bis @ilc have fallen Out
at THE ,ctsldUley' mo, IS il 1Ossibie!" said
Mrs Figgins dts as tTue-asI draw breath
oftife." said Mrs. Higgins, stdl paRtrnS with
exertion, %Efor Mrs -Spriggias told me nottwo
minutes ago that she had just heard II from
Mrs. Virgins"
Mrs FIggins went forthwith TO see her
neigbbor 1wlggIns. She had scarcely seated
herself wl.al she said, Have YOU heard hew
that Matthew Nc Muz2le and bis w.ia had fai-
iaif cut OF SIR Chamber Uindc,sY'' "No! you
don't Say so' csc iafnod Airs-JWisgihs '4es,
its az true as the book Of Genesis, . said Ms
Higgins, "ior Just heard il from Mrs. Hig-
gins, VINO got IL not two minutes sgo from
Mrs. Sprggins, who had at q minuts before
from Mrs. WIggns.'
kirs Twig guns now took her turn. and with
the advantage OF Glib tongue and par OF
active feet. soon reported all over town,' that
Matthew McMagzie and his wife had both
broken their necbs By falling ont ct three Story
eciedaic--vAnd she gave for iles authority her
neighbor Mrs. Higgins, who had quoted Mrs
Higgins, who had referred TO Mrs. Spriggns,
who had the authority OF Mrs vi gyms, who
was said to have been an eye witness to the
fact.
aSmiing Goods aslesp.--We hope nobody
will doubt the truth of the following anecdote,
nor call IN question the proprlety OF putting
down tEe hero AS a Dutehman seeing that
the Knickerbockers and the Sahlafehsch iagers
have proscriptive right of snoezing shenso-'
ever and wheresoever they please
A fat descendant ofOne OF the old Dutch
burgers oil IBIS goodly city, wac awhile ago
attending an auction sale. Every body knows
at these sales & nod IS taken for bid, Very
Al. IL
merchant, who had set us late at 3 roF7-de
dow the night before, fell into a comfortable
snooze; in which condition, as people are apt
to do who sit and sleep, he kept
-tsNnd, nod, noddips."
The auctoneer, supposed he was buying
goods all the while, knocked down several
thousand dollars worth IN his name. 4he
sale was closed, and the Dutehman, uncon
cious of having made any purchases, rubbed
his eyes and returned home. Il may Well be
supposed then, that hswas prodigiously as
fonisbed the next morning, when bill Of
goods as long as has arm, puTportng TO have
been purchased by hun the day before was
sent TO hun.
aKere's a bill of your goods, SIR" said the
Mercury of the yard stick,
Mime geotsn exclaimed the Dutchnlan,
swat goots"
NNhy, the goods you purchased yesterday
at auction
"Mine Gott buys no goots yesterday
I attends sale to be sHre, but did not pld."
<sNot b,dt howc0 1t then that the goods
were struck down TO you"
'fAlinc gracious! DOW think how il was--I
gets asleep, ond while was noddin, de tam
auctloneer made do mistake"
~ Y Constellation.
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