Martinsburg gazette and public advertiser. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1826-1833, 1830-01-07

tney regulated uaeif commemorative mirror IN
which they longed to see themselve. at full
length reflected.
Things were in this state, when one uorn-
ing Miss Spinks, a young lady of a grave and
intellectual cast of mind, with face broad at
the forehead and peaked at the chin, ike
kite, called at the Simpkinses for the purpose
of inquiring into the character of a servant
maid. The Simpkinses were delighted by
such cOnde:cension. Miss Spinks was such
charming young woman such dear c:ea-
ture.--so well-bred, so welI-dressed, and
above all, so well informed Such, for at
least month afterwards, was the hourly to-
pic of conversation at the grocer's table: il
came up with the breakfast tray. it helped to
digest the dinner, it served as a night cap af-
ter supper, until at length old Simpkins, in
consideration Of his neighbours importance,
was prevailed on to depart SO far from his
homcly notions OF household economy, as to
allow his wife and children to return Miss
Spinks visit. In due time both parties, as
matter of course, became intimate; bat as
literature was all the rage at the Common
Couacilnan's, the Misses Simpkins were for
time at fault, until seasonable supply of
novels procured secretly from fashionable
publisher in The Minories, enabled them to
converse on more equal footing.
1t was about this period that the Third Sc
ries of the Tales of My Landlord appeared.
The Spinkses who had heard from Alderman
Do5bs that the descriptions were ssuncommon
like natur,'' of course read il I; so of necessity
did the Simpkinses; and, as Miss Spinks kept
an album, il came to pass that she one day
commissioned Thomas Simpkins to copy into
it faw of the most notable passages. On
what slight circumstances do the leading
events OF life depend! The youth delighted
with his task, ventnred, after concluding it, to
interpolate some stanzas OF his own; Miss
Spinks inquired who was the author: when
Tom, blushing like Mrs. .Md!aprop, confess
ed the soft Impeachment, was instantly pro-
nounced a genius, and as such introduced by
the Spinkses TO all their higher acquaintance.
Genius What a fatal talisman exists in
that portcn:ous word. How many industri-
Gus families has it led astray How much
common sense has it shipwr-ked! How
many prospects, once bright and imposing,
has it utterly, incurab!y blghted
Astonished at her sons promise, dazzed
by the hopes oil his prelerment, all Mrs. Simp-
kins' usual good sense iorsock Ier. The
wisdom OF the world was lost in the feelings of
a mother. She gave play at once TO the most
ambitious expectations, and resolved hence
forth not to let an hour escape without stri-
ring to inocolate her husband With this
view, she called every possible resource to
her aid She appealed to bis affection as
father, to his pride as man; she pointed out
the injustice, not TO say inhumanity, Of
thwartng the genius of Thomas; she talked of
his wealth. his deserts, his dignites; and, final
ly, by some miracle, for which have never
yet been able to account, persuaded the old
gentleman to relax so literally IN his anti
poetic notions, as to despatch Thomas to Ok
ford, where he would infalliblY have gained
the prize poem, had it not, by some unac-
equitable mistake, been transferred TO ano-
ther.
tits from this period that the historian Of
the Simpkinsites must date their decline and
fall. Thomas returned home in due time
from the University, finished genius, but as
poor as such geniuses arc apt to be; while his
father, who now began to repent having sent
him there, proposed buying him share in q
groeers shop at Whtechapel But the gift
ed youth .iisdained such base employment
He had soul above figs. What, Thomas
Simpkins, Esq. OF Brazen Nose, author OF
poem which was within an inch of gaining
the Chancellor's Prize, stand behind the
counter in white apros, answering the de-
mands OF some uneducated customer for ga
quarter of a pound ofmoist sugar, and change
for sixpence." Impossible the idea was re-
voting to humanity
Nevertheless, something must be done;
one cannot live upon gentility, even though
certificated at Oxford Old Simpkins was
precisely of this way of thinking; so, as
next resource, proposed articling his son to an
attorney. But here again a difficulty pre-
sented itself. The business of solicitor re-
quires, it is well known, The impudence of
Yorkshire post boy--whereas Thomas was
diffidence itself Law, then, was out of
the question; the church presented equal inn
pedinlents; the navy, though respectable, was
inappropriate; the army ruinousiy expensive.
In this exigence, nothing remained but litera-
ture; to which, after many an urgent, impas
stoned, but fruitless remonstrance from his
father, the young man finally resolved to adj
dict himself Meanwhile, his kind patrons,
the Spinkses, thinking naturally enough that
genius should vegetate among eongenial
scenery, took him on visit TO their villa at
Newington Butts, where, in romantic sum
! mer-house, built up of red bricks and oyster
shells, he gave vent TO some of the sweetest
! stanzas imaginable One of these, inspired
| by that poetic ceremony, the Lord MAYORS
| Show, fell accidentally into the hands ofhs
| Lor,ishp himself, who pronounced the author
| to be ga clever fellow, and one as knew
what's what This opinion, delivered in
| public by so great Judge, soon made the
| round of Crutched-Friars; so that whenever
| Thomas CHANGED to make his appearance,
the.very shop-boys would whisper admiringly
/ IN Il.