Phenix gazette. [volume] (Alexandria [D.C.]) 1825-1833, 1829-10-31
EDITORIAL WIT.

= f"esNon " ,ir..r
EVERY MAN TO HIS Pssr.-Three v,,,.'
gentlemen in NewYOrk were lately ,.t"sl
by the watch alta late hour Of the n,t >'' y
specially drunk, and no, at al in anSs, , ','l
mood, each man, very quietly, doing h;''""
TO hold up one Of The stone posts IN n, n, os
~.
EAnLY RIsINc.-A certain s5ri,, =.
biIi.y in England has received a comm;.. " n''
a cavalry officer. His l1ighness is ,isb,
ten years Of age, and somewha, hiyhc, IN w.
ure Than quart pot:
LIST, LIST. OH LIsT!-A niggardly old h,.,
in The city, who lately had suit Of cIo"
made by tailor, threatened Snip with wv.
another kind for cabbaging The coaser r5a
his brond cio,h. The tailor m ade se,s,I@
ting reflections upon the miser's sinpib..,
stood upon his prescripi,ve right TO The ,i..
in action. Both parties were abou, 10 rn,'
the hsts, bu, the affair was finally stilcl.tm
LAND OF Non. a country clergyman i,
was somewha' lengthy in his di>cour,, Lug
60, as FAR as fifteenth ~ and sixteenth h b,f'
he discovered that his auditors were mid ~
Dodding under the efft,,s of Of his sopo,il.
ment," divided into eleven heads.
- BEAR Miss TAKE A worthy farme,D,h..
North part r. Vermont, who had unaceoum.
LOST number Of his sheep, having dseovr,
strong indications that the perptlra Or ,c,p
be no other than o bear, set q number Of ,,,.'
and retired for the night. On visiting h.r
the mex, morning, he found to his utter am,,.
men, thai he had caught dog, calf, . sh,rr
and-his daughter Sally Ihi. last was, 81
one. but The old man with truly phiIosop6r
feeling said. she wa, darw'd sorry S ur %,
caich'd, for she ,cWni able 10 mix nor f'E.
hay for long rim7."
WEARING WIFE.-A poor man uf Gree,.
ock, S. land, lately applied to magi,ral, IL
have two III his children admitted on The poor,
roll : How many have YOU said the b4iIiir-
give and twenty" "All By one wife," "Os
no, sir, am wearing the fourth"
A county member, Sn E K---.ro,e sud.
denly, one evening, in The House oI CvmmoD,
and thus addressed the CHAIR -" NJ Sneak
err, | wish tu call the attention Of he Hous. 10
a subi.ci which per sonaliy concerns mysri
almost every member in it," There va, +,
cluded the Hon. Barone, had an important
question or privilege TO submit. 81 uisb 70
give notice, Nj Speaker, tina, on Tuesday n,n
| shall move for repeal Of rh- Act, ps,.t
last SesNon, relating TO rogues & ,agabo d."
A roar of lau eh,er followed IBIS annovncvmenl
The Act alluded 10 was one relating 10 he
Game Laws
-, ii,
mends thai the sexton be authorised 10 70
rourd TO the pews during service. ard awsk !,
the sleeping members of the congregations
The Editors Of the Boston Cen,inel recon,
mend, that the sex on, once a we, K, call on The
clergyman.
SuIcIDE.-The Berkshire American re-
late. he fact that bear recently sho himself
in that yicini v, withiwO muske balls Br
in was examining farmers cor, frld bs moon
light, when he stumbled npon . cord attached
to 'wo guns, and received their contents b'
his intrusion. The farmers wife bosd Ou d
the carcase, three poIes Of Bears Oil and fOg'
teen pail. Ut soap Gr,,se."
In he present rage for cu,ivating whi'k,n
the farmers wife will find her "threr pals W
"f Bears Oh" will BIZ precious article 10 10.
marker. We know several young sen'Ismft
who have Iaboured with al commendable dill
gence 10 vigilance their chins," bul have found
a thsnkless soil--the Bears Oil will come
go"d ime.
HYpERBoLE "A Vermont horse Jockey boast
ing he Other day Of The speed Of his horse,
gravely asserted that he could troi sevenfen
miles an hour. Seventeen miles an hodI'
saws by.siander, 81 guess thoI's ihumpr'
-'My dear fellow replied he Of The G's''
Mountsin, II miles is no great for The creature
now; Tor when he was but Two years old, 'N
lightning killed the cid mare, and chased 'M
colt all round the pasture, without ge'a's
within ten rods Of him. q
1, is said Of fop. that Lei.arr lhf Flow o.
his curls or his conversation was nalural-OoI
had been COMMITTED TO paper
"a STRAY PIG James Pig, Of Nashville 40
vertis"s his wife as an absentee from hIs bs5'
board"
She ought 10 be ""poundcd.
DO tell me why you have bought that cast,
off door piate!' asked the husband Of or
these notable bargaineIa Deer me, ''pw
the wife, you know il is always my plan
lay up things against the time Of need; wv
knows bui you may dir;and marry man VI"
the same name Us that on The door.plae