Lancaster gazette. [volume] (Lancaster, Mass.) 1828-1830, 1829-09-22
POETRY.
FROM THE LONDON MONTHLY MAGAZINE.
A CHAPTER ON HEATHEN MYTHOLOGY

In Mr.. looke,
For Homer's gods and goddesses
The males in the air,
So big and so bare,
And the girls without their boeices'
There was Jupiter Zeus,
Who pIay'd the deuce,
A rampant blade and tough one;
But Denis bold,*
Stole his coat of gold,
And Rigid him out in stun one
June, when old, (
Was bit of a scold,
And rupd jure dicino;
When he went gallivanuting,
His steps she kept haunting,f
And she play'd, too, the devil with lno.
Minerva bright
Was blue-stocking Wight,
Who lodg'd among the Attics;
And, like lady V
From the men did fee,
To study the mathematics
Great Mars, we're told,
Was grenadier bold,
Who Vulcan sorely cuckold.
When to Rome he went,
He his children sent
To she-wolf to be sucked.
Sol, the rat-catcher,+
Was great body-snotcher,
And with his bow and arrows
He B,rked, through the trees,
Master Niobes,
AS though they had been cock-sparrows.
Diana, his sister,
When nobody kiss'd her,
Was saint, lat least semi-one,l
Yet the vixen Scandal
Made terrible handle
OF her friendship for Endymion.
Full many feat
Did Hercules neat,
The least our credit draws on
Testing Menus, SO sly,
Said, otis all my eye"
And he call'd him Baron Munchausen.
Fair Bacchus's face
Many sign did grace,
{They were not painted by Zeuxis)
Of his brewing trade
He MYSTERY made,S
Like our Calverts and our Meuxes.
There was Mistress Venus,
q say it between us,)
For virtue cared not farden:
There never was seen
Such drabblish queen
In the parish of Coveht Garden.
Hermes cunning
Poor Argus funning,
He made him drink like hufcr;
To his great surprise
Sew'd up all his eyes,
And stole away his heifer.
A bar-maid's place
Was Herbe's grace,
Till Jupiter did trick her;
He turn'd her away,
And made Ganimede stay
To pour him out his liquor.
Ceres in life
Was farmers wife,
But she doubtless kept a jolly house;
For Rumour speaks,
She was had by the Beaks
To swear her son Triptolemus,T
Miss Proserpine,
She thought herself fine,
But when all her plans miscarried,
She the Devil did wed,
And took him to bed,
Sooner than not be married.
But the worst of all gods,
Beyond all odds,
1t cannot be denied, oh
Is that the first of match-makers,
That price of house-breakers,
The urchin Dan Cupido.
. M.
Not Catholick agitator, las some Brunswicker
1t imagine) but Dionysius, very orthodox ty
who lived before Pompey was invented. H,
lot wait for clerical permission to put his enc
to death; and broke his promises as cleverl,
he had hundred bulls in his pocket.-Scri6
t"lll search out the haunts
Of your fav'rite gallants,
And into cows mera morphose 'em."-JIidas.
apollo Smintheus. He DESTROYED great man
IN Phrygia, and was probably the first "rat-catch
} the King."-Ket. ScEol.
y" Mystica vannus Iacchi.n
ms was either porter-brewer's dray, or NOR,
ably the Yea of his druggist Scriblerus.
mere is some difference of opinion concernin,
lact the lady, like SO many others in her inter
g situation, passed through the adventure unde
ttGs. But that Cerer and Terra were the same
easonable person will doubt and there can b,
sIaous Objection to the little trip being thus as
ID to the goddess in question.-Ibid.
IA CERTAIN CURE FOR THEN
ITCH.
HIS filthy and infectious disorder, be i
ever SO lnyeterate, may be cured in one hour
icGti0n by the use of
DUMFRIE'S OINTMENT,
is uuriyalled for the o,Iooeo,J..oso o..o -, u: