Martinsburg gazette and public advertiser. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1826-1833, 1829-08-13
popular Gales.
THE PiMENTo FAMILY; OR, sPoIlED
CHILDREN.

80 @RNNf ~ &c
msFksbie Tor a sort Of pepperiness of temnsr
which acquired her the reputation of a vixen
whist yeta mere nInx, a virago when a Virgin.
and a Xsnipre now she is a wife. Her ahsn
late "shaR' was a 6at set to be contrsyened in
Loth5ury iurIpg Ser msideasge. nor in Fms
bury square, in her ~wifssge; at less, by beings
bearing as little gall about them as the humble
and peace loving Sir Peter. IT elevk or cook.
hOdSe-ms'd or nurse-msid, exhibited the
shfhtess spice Of opposition to The heme.sd
ma,strstIon. the house wss dissolved si,c die,
and tie msicantsn;s expelled. 70 61d new con
st'tuents, If they could.
SIR Peter, in the three preparatory years Of
hts welded infe'icity. was on three several
occasions, made happy, though exceedingly
i0commoded, by the producticn OF twp sons
and = daughter, to be The Give branches Of his
fable. A hundred humble names were, with
all proper submission, suggested by SIR Peter,
as cSgn0mens tor the crude P,men'os, bot
were ali and ~seveFaliy oveTruted by the sbsolu c
cit shall MT be- of his lady; and, accordingly,
young Pimeato, No. l VS. chrstened Aired;
NJ. 2, Augustus; and Nc. 3, Ansranths; be.
cause she had been pronounced by Mrs. Depu
~ Dogrove (wiis wss culllvating botany to be
the flower of the PIN eotos. SIR Peter would
have preferred the pisln English triumsirate
OF John, George, and Betty but when he mut
tered, rather than sud,biy expressed, bts three
wishes on that Important head, a eoss OF snoth
or head, a diistation OF the nostriis, sud q irown,
! put down tina Intellectual opposition; ana the
quiet loving merchant siccumbed away from
the pertiBaciousness of his spouse TO The price
current, and the averages OF runs, sugars,
~gingers. and arrow root.
Twelve years passed, and the young Pimrn.
tos really began TO grow very interesting at
the dinner. parties with which the hospitsble
merchant eAteftsmed lis ireDds daiing school
vacations, that The juveniles might See some
thing of the world. and the world see something
OF the Juveniles Master Alfred could rant the
sohiiqules in DosgLqs, aud, to shew tie versa
tility of his geulus, perform Little Pickle
with an additional scene (got up by Lady "a.
mento herselt, who began 10 betray symptoms
OF 5ieu ism,) in which he set fire TO a chintz
curtan, broke Some china chimney
! upset a dumb waiter. and fired q cracker under
the char of his indulgeht paps. The several
parties Who were made sudieuces ct his pranks.
pronounced him To be a prodigy in mischief.
Lady z. was del shted; While the Judicious'
SIR Peter greped.
Master Augustus was also a prodigy, but in
smother tine, He could hit the house cat on
the nose with a blunt arrow 1--WE times out OF
ten, and strike an egg Out ot : breskfast.eup
once out of twice, II he did not break both cup
and egg at the first five. IL was indeed. pro-
phesied by the sporting part OF the city. that
he must ultimately become the hest shot OF
has day.
Miss Arsmatha was the third prodigy mu.
seal snd metrical prodigy. 10 her eleventh
summer she could make verses; and, in her
twelfth marry metre TO music, but like most
early marriages, the tangled most deplsrsbly.-
Her master, Signor Soprano. pronounced her,
as well as he could express his ffat,ety, 10 be
"a Ellington in the bud;' and her l~adyship.
as sugars were 'iooking ups in the market,
raised the professors salary half a guinea per
Quarter.
Under the instruction Of the sigRor, Miss
Arama'ha had already began TO scream out
sounds II was a misery to hear and thump
the piano ia such q manner AZ was barbsrous
to behold. ID. placer, and Una uoee pace ia,
hiied the town house IL P~insbury with dlscords
dire the superHax halt filing the area forming
The square, and frightening that merchant con-
gregsting spot from its propriety.' Lady +.
however, and her co.er,e were delighted to
observe the devotion with which the young
lady wens through the rudimentary martyrdom
of her musical education
have toredated a principal incident in my
history; foF it was at this era that Peter fi-
mento, Esquire, became Sir Peter Pimento,
Knight. He bad been elected Sheriff OF Lon.
don; and an address of congratulat'on about
something procured him tbs intoxicating honor
OF knighthood. Then Il was that the Plmen-
tos looked up;' and Sir Peter, after much
special pleading, for the sake of that peace
OF which, as sheriff, he wsss public csnserystor,
reluctantly agreed that a more fashionable house
and a more fashionable neighborhood, were
necessary to the double dignitaries of sheriff
and knight. Accordingly, the Pimenios emi.
grated to Portlsn place. Sir Peter. however,,
soon discovered that a residence so situated
was too far from he city Tor commerce., and
100 near for the country air. One horn ot thus
dilemma was seon gilt over: Lady 7 insisted
upon a second carriage. The merchsnt de-
murred but in vain il was ordered trou btrca.
Prince LeopoIds builder; end Lady r aud
Miss Arsmsnths kept il IN activity-hrst, ey
shopping expeditions, about the West End, IN
tbs morning-snd sec ondly, by quitting IN APP
peafances 10 the Park two hours before dinner.
Sir z. complained, and was told he Gould wen
afford = third carriage, for ginger was 10 os-
mand.' Anything for q quiet be- thoughs
Sir p. and a third carriage was placed on tue
stocks Lady p. then discovered that hsr
'dear Alfred could not positively take rans
with the young nobility with whom nc haa
bowed himself into acquaintance, 1t he was not
allowed sesbriolet.
Here Sir Pster did venture to rebel so tar IS
10 lift his eyebrows in astonishmens, aad = ia
il, Madam. this IS too much and a posiuso
Mop had hslf-escaped his lips, when the 'aay
informed him, in her p~erempiory way, thas
opposition was useless-lt was necessary 70
the dignity Of the family; that she bad ordered
Birch TO build a ~curricle for the dear boyi ana
Il g.. Peter refaSed the expense, she would