Litchfield enquirer., 1829-01-29
ARTIFICIAL EYES.

ARTIFICIAL EYES.
 have read several advertisements and several p,li!s. on Dr. Scuddcr's skill in ma king artificial eyes bui have treated them as dn every thing artificial, that is, with great ind.ll.iencr aud neglect. l met the little doctor jaSI week, trOttng along in his bus;iin1 vav. having Ht,le boy with him: ''lierr," said he, "vou have treated my arttiria! eyes rather indifferent v---now look at one which this boy has" t,uund lha, the lad wore an artificial eye o! grey color, which very closely resembled the natural one, and set SD well in the socket as not to be easily detected. The boy said he had worn it eight months, without any pain or inconvenience. Here was proof positive, undoubted evidence 1.-the fact. The Doctor took out his pocket-case, and exhibited pair of elegant hazle eyes, just finished. This is very useful invention, and much preferable to black patch, or pair ofgreen specs, to supply the loss of peeper. They wonf do, however, in Kentucky, in gougjng frolic, the glass being apt to cut the ilnmb of the opera tor. We are however making great pro- gress in the art fof artifcials, and there is no accident to the human form, or freak of nature, which cannot be remedied and improved by these modern inventions, SD that making an artificial man will be the next project.
 l remember, in London, fine flashing beau, of the first water, by the name of Harry Franco; l met him one day in Ox- ford st. buying a pair of shammy gloves at an extensive manufacturers, who by the bye, remember said he was father to our pretty Mrs. Young of the Bowery ,and talk ed great deal about America. Harry Franco invited me to dine with him, at hotel in one of the squares, where I was to get maccaroni and parmesco cheese, aud partridge stewed with cabbage, Ga vile dish.) He took me to his lodgings in the Adelphi, to dress for dinner, ,wherc scene almost incredible took place. His cham- Der was tastily furnished, and had every thing in it becoming and gentlcmanIy.- He threw his hat on settee, took of iliS coat, went in front ofthe dressing glass and took off handsome wig, ala Brutus, ex- posing head perfectly bald he then took from his right socket glass eye, which he carefully wiped with cambric handkerchief; he unloosed an entire set of artificial teeth, which he deposited in d tumbler of clean water; he then united a pair of pads, or false calves, and to my ut ter amazement stood before me man of 60 years of age, horribly dis6gured and di- :pidated. l looked upon him in silent astonishment. In short time he made himself whole again his wig brushed and sprinkled with orange flower water, was replaced his teeth ncel y clean and dried, were placed in their former position his glass eye deposited in its socket; his pads were buckled on; and with buckskin brooches, white top boots, blue coat, buff waistcoat, new hat, gloves, and cane, Har- ry was again beau of 40, realizing, in a few minu,es,a metamorphosis which would have struck Ovid himself with awe. We dined together, and Harry having drank a few more glasses of London particular than was agreeable, grew drowsy, and resolved to go to Drury Lane. We obtained a good seat in the dress circle, when Harry's drowsy fit coming on him, he fell asleep, and this brings me to the story about the artificial eye. All the pinching and nudg- ing in the world could not arouse him-he began to snore, and the ladies to stare his natural eye was closed, bur his artificial one was open, which, under the operation ofa heavy slumber, gave him the most awful and singular appearance imaginable. We, therefore, caution, in remembering this circumstance, all who purchase glass eyes of Dr. Scudder, against sleeping in company; unless, indeed, the Doctor can invent d mode of closing the artificial, as we'll as the real eye, when in the arms of Somnus.
 There is also moral in the anecdote of my old friend Harry Franco, which may be applicable now-a-days as an admoni- ton to the ladies-"lOok before you leap." -Noah.
 SELF LOVE.
 Self-love is the love of ones self, and ot every thing for the sake of one's self: il