Daily Richmond Whig. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1828-1831, 1829-07-25

has the most ardent attachment to all chill |
drcn. She takes every little urcllin in her
arms, Kisses him, call him a darling che
rub, and and gazcs on him delightedly, (at
least when his mamma or papa is PRESENT.
although the "darling chorub" be spoiled,
clumsy, rcd-hcadcd, disagrccable varlct.----
With all the minu,ive of little family histo-
rios Miss Amelia Treaclc-tongue is particu-
larry well acquaintcd; she communicates u
piece Of scandal in the softcst and most con-
hdontial manner; she "hints Doubt or
,'hcSitatcs dislike" with whispery semitic
ness quite irresistible. She is rather deli
cate, yet goes abroad in all wcathers. AT
table,---not in her own house, but that of Il
friend, .shc is continually pressing YOU TO
At, and mountaineering on the poorncss of
your appetite. She has no taste or car for
music; but is exceeding useful i'll praising the
efforts Of all the young ladies of the house,
and III affecting rapture, till others think II
necessary 10 affect it too. She is rather
religious, and has Il temper which nothing on
Garth would seem capabc of ruffling; vet,
III truth, II her real character were known,
she Is the most pecvish, hypocrilical, greedy,
selfish, and yrannical being in existence.
She is concentration of stingS, smcarcd
over with nm external coating ofhoney; and
docs more mischief i'll her own onicious,
sncaking, underhand way, than hundr cd
boil. downright murdercrs. who kill their
men, and arc hanged for IT,
| The Clever Young charlottesville
growth Of this species of monster has been
so rapid, that it almost calls for the intcrfc-
renee of the legislature. Like the rats ofthe
old Egyptian city, they threaten to eat up
every thing. One can hardly turn without
meeting this monster. He is about two
and twenty; has rather an expressive face,
and an intermnab!e volubility of tongue
He is not one of those that hides his light
under bushel. Upon all subjects he is
equally at homc----,hat is To say equally SUI
pcrficial. He knows all about the next Wa
verify novel: he writes in Blackwood's Ma
gazine. or at least says that he writes lii il;
and can tell YOU who all tho articles arc by.
On the Corn Laws, the Drama, the Catholic
Question, the Opera, Phrcnology, and Mo-
dcrn Poetry, he is ever ready to pour forth
a torrent of information, of somewhat ephe-
neral interest Il is truc,----but that is not his
fault. He writes and speaks on every subject
that comes in his way His father is proud
OF him; his mother doats on him; his sisters
admire him; his cousins die for him. He
publishes IA thin Quarto volume of very mag
nIilcently printed poetry, and, ike Robert
hiontgomcry's, his own portrait faces the
utlePagc,--his neck bare, and shirt collar
turned down Ia Byron, Ibis hair combed
back over his brow, and his eye looking uD-
wards, TO see what is to be seen in the sky.
Sensible men pronounce him n coxcomb:
but the uniuitiated discover genius in every
line, and millincrs fall into a pning melan
choiy by the hundred. Then comes show
or OF Albums, and he writes in every one Of
them. ana signs his name at full length BY
way OF autograph. All this, though it may
maze "thc unskilful laugh, cannot but make
the ludcous grievc." The Clcver-Younp-
Man Monster, unless reused bv ridicule into
common sense and useful pursuit, sinks
into premature oblivion, and lives TO won.
der at his own litteness.
THE L1sipidyoumg-L y-yuonstcr.-This is
harmless but very annoying monster She
IS rather pretty, Iisps slightly, and as the Et-
trick Shepherd says, has great quantity of
waving curs abuno the brec." She very
frequently sits beside you at large and cere-
monIous dlnner-party. You determine TO be
agreeable, and almost brilliant; but, TO YOUR
Infinite distress, you discover, before the soun
Is removed, that the fair automaton has. in
her whole composition, only one idea and a
nail. She listens to You, but does not under
stand you; your most sparkling savings she
rewards with look of gentle bewildcrnent,
--haIi reproachful, and half deprecatory.-
10 - sue idnCled You were quIZZlng her. You
at length labor to say things as full Of inanitv
ana Stiffness as possible, and she immediate
ly regalns her cOmposurc, and thinks YOU have
begun to talk nationally. Her mama watch
cs the progress of the conversation, and i,
quite delighted with the attention YOU are
paying her daughter. When you return to
the drawmgroom, Il seat is reserved for Won.
as an especial favor beside the Insipid.yoilnr
Lady-Monster. Your concealed yawns al
most Kill you; but to make up for your real
IIstiessness you affect the most animated
pleasure, and next day all your friends wish
you Ioy, considering the marriage already
liked. The insiPid young lady actually knifs
purse Tor you, and sends it to you with n
notG' III which there arc only three gramma-
1''.a' errors For "a month, the very sight of
- P'ttlcoat gives you the yapours; and You ne
yer go TO a ccTcmonious dif,ncr.notty y,;,L
ont fear and tremblinU