Martinsburg gazette and public advertiser. [volume] (Martinsburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1826-1833, 1828-05-22
Alacellanenua.
From the Saturday Euenins Pos.
THE DISCARDED LOVER.

THE DISCARDED LOVER.
Among the variety OF Ills to which
woman IS heir, none perhaps are more
vexatious than the unwelcome atten.
tons of some disagreeable suitor. A
woman is situated somewhat peculiarly
in this respect; she is obliged TO re
ceive The visits of men however an
pleasing 10 her, aud compelled in
measure to treat them with civility, if
not with respect; for if her demeanot
towards them be reserved and dlsualn
fol, it is published to the world, and
her reputation for good pature becomes
disparaged. She is consequently o
bliged to be complaisant TO those whom
perhaps shr most heartily, supremacy
despises, and finds it difficult to rid
herself of such admirers. The men
on The contrary, are exempt from this
evil, for they can visit such only as
are agreeable TO them. THE sequel of
the following story, the truth Of which
is well authenticated, furnishes hap
by expedlent of getting rid OF such
eultors as are alluded to.
I'm certain nclghborhood lived
young damsel, the only child of plain
farmer; our heroine, who we will call
Peggy, was fine, bouncing, bloom
ing girl, bot rather more inclined to
zen bon point than the fashion ofthe
time sanctioned, but Peggy was a gIrl
of too much good sense to repine at
the unfashienable rotundity of her per
son, and unlike some damsels OF SINH
lar appearance, disdained TO resort to
such exped;ents as are frequently a.
dopted by The fan sex to bring about
diminution of their persons, such as
smelling at vinegar cruets, eating pick
led cucumbers, and the like. Although
our damsel could not boast of much of
that quality which by the fashionable
world is denomlnated refinement, yet
she possessed certain portion OF
shrewdress and acuteness which added
no inconsiderable eclat TO her character
among the neighbering SWANS; as may
very naturally ne expected, she was
surrounded by admirers, but as she
was somewhat suspicious that their ad-
miratien did not proceed so much from
the sIze of her person as her purse, she
was rather uncomfortable.
Among her admirers, was one
whose attentions were peculiarly often
sive to her; he was conceited, super
fetal, pestileel little fellow, whose vo
cation was that of an itenerant tailor,
going from one farm house to another
with his goose and lapboard, trans.
forming the old garments of the pa
rents into new ones for the children,
&c His name was Zebidee Stitch.
Our knight of the 'himble, like many
other knights before him, became dis.
satisfied with bis occupation, and a
mong many other plans for anaeilorat
ing it, he cast his eyes upon the fine
round form OF our heroine IF / can
get her, says he to himself, 'and that
fine farm of hers I'll convert my
goose into pioughshare ,and my shears
into pruning hook; and why not:' says
he, many man inferior to me, has
gained Tie affections of as likely girls
as she--she is but woman, therefore
70 be wooed Possessed with the idea
that his goose waxed old, and his
thrnbIe rusty, all his thoughts and pur
poses were bent to the attainment oil
his designs. Her dislike TO him was
unconQuerable, and various were the
means made use oil by her to get rid of
his opportunities, bot they proved I'm
avaiIlng, for he was totally insensible
to hints however plain and palpable;
she would pin the dish cloth TO bis tail,
sci tubs OF dirty water in his way,
and cause him to fall into them, but he
would always rise with the EIost i'm
perturable serenity, laugh it off as a
good Joke, and considered It rather a.
an evidence OF her affection than her
hatred. Amopg the many unsuccess
tul efforts to shake him oil, was the