Literary cadet and Rhode-Island statesman. [volume] (Providence, R.I.) 1827-1829, 1828-08-09

During our conversation, lnlormod
her that intended to proceed early the
next morning to the house OF u friend,
some miles distant, where should spend
a number Of days. had not been ma
ny hours at my friends house, when |
was stunned with report that she was
no more. l was, at first, incredulous
respecting it,but confirmation of it with
statement of the particulars, soon ar
rived; and there were circumstance
which induced the awful belief that she
had accustomed her own destruction, by
swallowing laudanum.
AT this intelligence, CONSERVATION and
grief almost ovepowered mc.-But will
not attempt to describe my feelings, for
to describe them justly would be mpos-
sible. | withdrew to privacy and gave
vent to my sorrow, until | became able
to suppress the violence Of lis emotions
in public. On the same evening, before
| had recovered sufficient composure to
appear in company, ! received the fol-
lowing letter. 1t had upon it the post
mark Of the village, in which Mrs Orms-
by had resided, and knew the super
scription to be in the hand writing of
that lovely but unfortunate lady.
Dear Sir.-'IIow different am I now
how different have | been from what
you once knew me TO be, You knew
me when was gay, careless, and hap
py Eut | have long since been wretch
ed; alas! infinitely more wrctched than
my most intimate friends have ever sup
posed. The burthen Of my life has at
length become intolerabIe, and 1 an de-
termined to abandon it. Why should any
one who has the means of avoiding tor
ture, continue TO suffer ii know the
world will condemn the deed which am
resolved to commit. But the world can
not estimate the misery from which its
commission will release me. Still would
not defy the world; | would disarm its
censurcs, | would proptiate its kindness
as much as possible, by apprizing it Of
the mental sorrows that have embittcred
my existence, and induced me to fly to
death as a refuge from wre,chcdness.-
Besides have, in great point, been
highly culpable, and feel as if by con-
Tossing my error, | shall perform a sa-
cred duty, and die with more tranquility
and satisfaction. To you l have resolv-
ed to address my confession, because
from you, am sure Of sympathy and
kindness, sufficient to Judge charitably of
my conduct.
Il will not dwell upon the early and
happy season ofmy life, when you breath
ed INTO my cars the fcrvors Of true and
dislnterested love which it was not in my
power to return. | know not if there be
single individual in the world acquaint-
ed with the fact that my heart was unal-
terably devoted and pledged to youth
OF rare virtues, but Of extreme sensibility,
and having no other dependence than the
precarlous income arising from teaching
a small country school. This youth,
whose name was Arthur Annesley, had
accidentally met at the house of a
relation in the vicinity of the seminary
where | was educated. We had frequent
stolen and romantic interviews when our
hearts enjoyed The purest transports of
reciprocal affection. Previous to my
leaving the seminary, at one of those ro-
mantle meetings, on a beautiful summer
evening, by the bank Of rivule, that
watcred small solitary glen, we in the
mol solemn manner, pledged to each
otler, an Interchangeable fidelity in love.
Heaven knows that have continued
truly to love him, but my hand | gave to
another-ono whom knew to be accep-
table to my parents, and whom in pru-
dental point of view, | conceived'tO be
more eligible match than my inGigcnt
first lover. A few days after my marriage
| received from the latter the following
note:
Dearest Eoa-You have forsakcn me--you have broken
my heart l will not curse youj but can to give you:
will Try 10 do but ii shall be ia a distant land which
AgrhUR ANNEsLYn
"From the momen. perused this note
have never known comfort. BY some
means it fell into the hands of my hus-
band. 1t aroused his jealousy. We led
life Of mutual dsirust and contention.
lie had recourse to habtual intoxlcation
as refuge from the horrible reflections
that tormentcd him. lie avowed his de-
termination to destroy himself by large
draughts Of ardent spirits Several of
his attempts were frustrated by the vigi-
lance and care of his friends, but he at
length succeeded, and | have been for
three years miserable sel(-dctested
widow. Maternal affection for my two
boys alone has intorfercd with a design
| have long entertained, to follow my
husbands example, and by one act ter.
inmate my miseres and my life. by this
act ] shall cXpiatc my inGdolty to him
whom loved and forsook, and also my
imposition on him l married, but did no,
love.
"Shall | say that your recent visits
by restoring to my mind the memory o
past events, have renewed my soll-abhor.
] Il L. InS