Lancaster gazette. [volume] (Lancaster, Mass.) 1828-1830, 1828-12-16


over me for some days. 1t is true baG
no opportunity of trying my strength: and
knew not what effect my recent acci.
dent might have had on my frame, in rem.
derlng it less or more capable ofresistance
10 the approach of hunger. NV mind
seemed to me first susceptible of the adj
vance OF suffering, Tor my memory was
very quickly impaired. All nv recollec-
tons seemed in disconnected links or
united with what had not the remotest
affinity to each or ether, as is often the
case in fevered dream. Almost intolle.
raole restlessness of spirit at first accom-
PANIED my bodily tori ent, ending in deem
depression of mind, al I'D signing poured
forth my prayers to God necessarily but
tney seemed to give little or no consola-
tlon' Instead Of being followed by r.-:s-
ne am speakinr1of the early part
Oh my suffering, L relt inclined to murmur
the more at my destiny, and to task the
justice OF the Almighty in predestinating
me to such doom. Then my feelings
would be converted into keen regret. or
rather torment, for my murmuring. The
prospect of death added weight to my
mental anguish and suddenly summoned
before me, charging darkly in bulk, the
sins of my past life, until they arose to be
inaccessible barriers to the hope of eter-
nal glory when my miserable existence on
earth should have closed. / always rate
the mental torment endured on this oc-
caslon as equal to the bodily, during the
time the body preserved the consistency
OF its functions. Afterwards the mind
sunk down with it into species of apathy
no apprehension could rouse. In that
dreadful state l demanded of heaven if
my terrible sufferings would not propi-
tate my sins-whether heaven, that had
so permitted agony to be heaped upon my
head, would not balance it against my Of
fences towards its majesty Thus
prayed or murmured. Reason seldom
aided me. was the victim of sufering's
impulses, and was cast upon wild fancies,
enjoying no repose.
This stage of my trial soon had its end !;
| had no mode of computing time, for the
hands of my watch were invisible from
the darkness; | knew that it concluded
just after l had finished the last drop of
my water. The absence of this beverage,
though I had made it last me as long as
Is, could, produced a rapid ,ehanGe, in my
SENSATIONS tnIS well recollect. l began
to feel fainter and more weak, and my
limbs grew painfully cold. Shiverings
now and then came over me and my
mind, contrary to what,had happened be-
fore, seemed to have by far the advantage
of the body. I was conscious of delirium
at times, and Of demoniacal dreams, but
at entervals was more. composed, and
suffered little pain, but memorable debil-
| ty. The viscera seemed to me diminish
ed, and all energy in them extinct, feel
ing like dead mass, and as if those of
dead disemboweled animal had been
placed within me instead ofmy own. My
giddiness Of head increased, together with
the spasms and faintness. | am certain
too, that about this time became totally
blind, at least such is my firm impression.
l found, too, that in my paroxisms of de-
lirium had attempted to gnaw my arms,
but the larceration was not deep, simply
from the want of physical power to pene-
trate the muscle with my relaxed jaws.
When, o God, will my agonies end 2"
was my frequent sigh, for was too weak
for an articulatc ejaculation. seemed
to have forgotten words, even to myself,
as found when | tried to pray / could
not connect what would say, can well
remember. At length repose, which
seemed the forerunner of speedy death,
came upon me, though still sensible, but
powerless as corpse. | looked for my
deliverance by death with unconcern. l
have an impression that, while lying in
this state, heard the sound of artillery,
but l cannot be certain, any more than
can tell how long it was before became
wholly insensible.
MY next recollection of myself is most
painful one. | was | could not guess
where. Strange voices were around me,
and I could not see the speakers, from
utter want of vision. The horrible debil-
ity l felt in body combined with the ac-
tivity of my mind during my resuscita-
ton, was unspeakably painful-so much
so that the recollection almost overpowers
me at times even now. 1t appeared that
Ernest had escaped the effects of thir-
teen-inch shell, which burst over the pas
SAGE to the cellar and broke in the arch.
The seige grew warmer, and the city was
taken. When matters were little quiet,
the faithful lad did not fail to implore all
he met in my behalf A humane French
! or Jorod search to he made and |