The Virginian. [volume] (Lynchburg [Va.]) 1822-1829, 1827-05-08
MisnRlEs OF HUMAN LIFE


nll the hour for visiting is passed.
To get crust Of bread in the cavity
of a sensible tooth, giving you great
pain, and out of polileness TO the COM
pany, defer picking ii out ill dinner is o.
yer.
When nj n distance from home, 10
see your horse slip his bride, aud pro-
coed to return, just as you are getting
ready yoursel.--and describing all your
entrcalies TO wait for you.
To have been introduced TO a lady,
aud cndcavour in VAN at subsequent
meeting, 10 think of her name.
To wake up IN tho night with scnsn-
tons of great thirst, but with too much
anguor TO 90 for water.
II you board at public house, or &C.
caslonally dine with one Of your friends,
TO find on looking for your hat. that
somebody has snapped without your
, consent, and has given himself much the
best of the bargain
In looking for book which YOU wish
TO read or refer 10, fail in the search, a.
goni2ed with he reflection that the book
IS lent and the borrower not recolleet-
ed.
In shaving, To let the edge of the ra-
zor slip through the skin, the blood run.
nlng more freely as your Impotence 10
go to dinner, or upon your other urgent
business increases.
To have an act Of complaisance con-
strucd INTO an act of interest.
In carving a turkey, to make mis-
60 and splash the gravy all over the Ia
bic.
Nhonyou are in great haste to exam
me an important paper locked up in tn,
desk, 10 be suddenly enraged at the loss
oil your key.
10 SIT 50 long ON the sharp edee of
a char, that on rising TO walk, you lind
your legs asleep, and consequently,
that the locomotive powers are suspon-
ded.
To feel pnnctilious of your credit. nj
the same time ia debt aud daily dunned,
without the power TO pay.
Not to be able To laugh at story
when all the rest are laughing violonl.
ly.
In travelling an icy side walk, TO have
your heels slip up, and in recovering
your balance, 10 have your hat fly of.
10 return your best complalsance 10
a salutatlon which you find ON looking
round, was directed to another person.
In pulling ON still boot, to break
one OF the straps just before the heel slips
INTO its place.
10 have lady mistake your mean
ing, not perceivlng 1t I'LL it's too late, 4.
awkward 10 explain.
10 weat hard boot always pinchinp
that part OF the toe where the corn il.
10 be told the same story twenty
times over by the same person, ON the
pr, SUMPTION that you never heard il be-
fore.
When you meet person on the SIDE
walk, III narrow passage, to dodge tho
same way he does, in order to make room
for passng.
10 sacrifice comfort to etiquette, on
various occasions IN lie.
10 have your respect for lady dis
trusted from the unfrequency ofyonr Vi
s!tS, owing 10 the press Of business and
the desire oi improving your time.
When you ire walking very doliber-
ately III the dark, to step one foot much
lower TIM you intended, giving you
an uncomfortable jog in the back and
teeth.
To make large blot upon letter jus,
as you have finished writing it.
On retiring to bed, to extinguish your
candle by the sudden opening of your
bedroom door, leaving you 10 adjust
affairs in the dark.
In cndeaYorlng TO vrito witty obsory-
atoms to feel extremely doubtful how far
you hive succeeded, JAavEs.