The Massachusetts spy, and Worcester County advertiser. [volume] ([Worcester, Mass.]) 1825-1831, 1827-05-30

Kitchen. Sent Molly to Spital SQUARE !,
see master silk-weaver roasted. Cam,
back IN hurry, and said he was only @ II
stew" Vexed with Alderman Gobble
ABOUT the smelts. Asked him TO take =
glass OF MADEIRA, and accidentally. on mr..
pose, poured him out glass of vireGar
burst into snort of laughter to see his
wry face. My own went the wrong wav
ana was nearly choaked. Filled a blind
nut with cayenne pepper, and gave it nv
wife to crack. Had her a second time +
thought she would have spit out her eve
tecth IN getting rid Of It's effects. Knew
my brother was going out to an evening
party, and had soaped the heels of his
snoes. Was delighted to hear him come
pump down on his crupper, overhead
went up to have my laugh, and found him
crying with sprained ANGLE, the sonp hav-
ing gwen him prime slide Ran down to
send for the doctor, but nobody would 20.
beAeylng | only meant to make them
April Fools" Went myself and came
all haste back with doctor Bolus. Found
a cat tied by thetail to the knocker. kick
ing up precious clatter. Couldn't 90
near for fear of my ewes. At last she
worked the skin off her tail. and bolted.
Cook opened the door all consternation.-
Scrambled up stairs to nv brothers room.
with Bolus at my heels, but he was not
there. Came running down AGAIN; trod
on some peas which my son Jack had Mac
ed to ovorturn the maids: was launched
forward like seventy four, and rose ma
Jestically with all the skin off nv back.
Limped into the drawing room. and found
my brother had only been gammoning.-
Made virtue of necessity, and laughed
with tears IN my eyes, and pains in nv
bones. Not done vet. Sent cook to the
linen diapers for two yards of ell wide pack
thread. Came back and said "they ant
got none so narrow" Had another hearty
hugh; but changed my tone on old drip
ping coming back, and saying she had left
the door agar while she was gone for the
ell wide packthread, aud some fool or 9th
er had walked off with my great coat, and
Alderman Gobble's hat. No such fool eli
ther, thought |. Wanted to get rid of
dobhle, and told sack to tell Tom to get
some one to come and say that his mother
was dead. The news camo, but Gottle
took 1t very easy. /" | know it." said he,
/" for was at her funeral when was four
teen. 9 No 60" and he had the smile in
his favor. Determined to be even with
HIM, and after supper filed the kettle with
gin, and put bottle of the same on the ta-
bic Swore it was fine strong spirit, and
tried in vain to weaken it with water from
the kettle. Got blind drunk, played the
devil with the Turkey carpet, and / was
obliged to send him homo in q COACH
gone to see oil right in the kitchen, and
made "apple pie" with the sheets by turn
ing If up half way with the tail towards
the head. Thought. / should have died of
laughing to see her getting in. Called me
an old BOBBY, and got out TO make the bed
again. Put cut the candle, and got in my
self, but found, to my great dismay, that
there were two sorts of bed-pies, for Betty
had actually placed large dish of hair pie
under the Clothes into which, jumped, but
was very well content, in the end, to find
it was nothing worse.
Yours, &c. AN OLD JOKER.