American watchman and Delaware advertiser. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1822-1828, 1827-09-04
From the Masonic Mirror.
COMICAL JOE"
Monthly Magasiass

"OOMlCAL JOE.1
Drawn in the nat,ering liable OF Ter eve!
Hanged IN The trowning wrinkle OF her brow
And qiartsred in her heart he doth espy
Himself loves traitor This is nifty nov,
That hanged, and drawn, and quarered there shoa bs
In such love, SO vile lout as he.-M Shakespeare.
My old grandfather soldier of the reyo'u.
ton; and often told US many good stories Of the
z. continental army" Here he wrote the second
of the first series of his tales Let him sneak,
We had among US an odd genius. known by the
appeaton Of Is Comical Joe' He was the wo.k
Of one of natures journeymen endowed with
symmetry of person. without the necessary intel.
lectua polish. He had many good qualities. and
was always ready to serve his comrades for "hons
he innocehtly furnished abundant sport. lie seem
ed to have natural propensity. Or taste, for but
r-milk, and every 1airy-uaid in the country ~as
a favorte of his. The army encampeti. he WAS OH
the look -out--the nearest farmers house fail
ed to be honored BY lis presence; if it contained
rosy damse his visits were not the less Ire
quent. or less ardent. 1t IN one of these bat
ter milk excursions on tie Hudson, that put
cal friend nearly lost what sense he had il not his
| ile He had formed an intimacy with tie daush
ter Of respectable Dutch farmer. not strictly a.
greeabe to all parties: vi this he had often been
assured. and in various ways: sometimes by the
misapplication of mynheer's foot this he always
took in high dudgeon, for it touched his honcr ;
but had other visible ELECT than to teach him
caution. So long as he could get sweet cunsoiy
ing word from the girl Of his heart" and sup
ply If butter milk, equally dear to hin.- he nur
10 be defeated by mere trifes. His visits were
repeated regularly in the afternoon, tor TN, ~as
the most favorable time, on account OF the Dutch
mans absence. This intercourse was Successful
Nv carried on for awhile but he at en-ta '1acamc
incautous. at one Of these visits he had been too
lovingly engaged. either with the maid Or butter-
milk, perhaps with both, to keep a proper note OF
time. The Dutch father had returned home. and
Jne and the maid we're in the meal chamber. An
| important crisis had arrived. My hero was ttenl-
bIinsly sensible Of the punishment that awaited
him in case of detection; my heroine was not less
apprehenslve of consequences. :" " hat is to be
done 20 exclaimed each other alternately but no
time could be lost in speculation. call from the
stentorian Dutchnan. threwJue into the meat chest
this being the only possible chance OF escape In
this situation he was emphatically" comical Joe -
Here his mind was occupied IN philosoph,ins Oh
the adventures Of love, the probability of escape,
and the grotesque appearance he should make. II
fortunate enough to extricate himself; when end
denly he was reused from his neditations by tie
sound of the Dutchman's well known font ON the
stairs. Joe watched the entrance Of III, fearful
friend through the key hole in the chcst--he saw
the fatal meal bag upon his shouldcr-saw him SET
it down, ard calmly measure out half hushel--
tremblingly saw him approach the chest !-teariui
moment the lid flew open, and Joe was literal
" bun led alive an involuntary screech escaped
him, and he as nvoluntary sprung upon his knees.
The Dutchman though not easily startled bA fear,
not expecting to find i'll his meal chest any being
in the shape Of mar. could not Withstand the spec
tired scene before him --tye hurled with hereu'ean
strength the measure at the head el ptor Joe ana
made precipitate retreat. Never did the CID lei
low run faster; his hair stood erect; teeth chat
tered and limbs trembled; tnmbed over his dau:,h-
ter In the door way, and heels ever head into the
yard lie could go no further amt It was with the
Greatest difficulty that he could be persuaded! ne
lad not seen his Satanic majesty III persian. ~
fer much persuasion, he was induced 10 return to
the meal chest, where lay our hero suffering from
The woun, he had received. A curious spectacle
Iindeed--blo0d and meal The Oatchman would
hardly believe his own eyes, till they met those OF
his unwelcome visitor. Oh ascertanng this Tact,
hi. ,d animosities returne,-Joc was ordered to
tic. which movement he made with some difficult.
lint throeh the influence Of the daughter. the usa-
al cast;oat;nn was dispensed with. He was de-
ta;nad boweycr, with some little attention 10 his
wounds, until morning, when he was brought foiity
a larre meal bag thrown over his head, tied at the
bottcln and he placed longtudinaly Oh the back Of
the Dutchtnan's nag. III this manner he was con-
yeyet) to the camp. and presented to his commands
inc officer. amid the huzZas and laughter OF ms COM
raIies. lie was Invested of his external garo' anh
never aid man before present 81 lndicrous a iiets-
IRE The aGalr afforded matter Of amusement 10 :
rna tie whole campaign. and is often told at tl's
| day hy those who were then acquainted with inc
! 8 ~ .''''s : TIMOTHY.