The Massachusetts spy, and Worcester County advertiser. [volume] ([Worcester, Mass.]) 1825-1831, 1827-11-21
.5Hl@ceIlamn.
From the Boston Spectator.
THE CORPORAL.

= THE CORPORAL.
: ne mat never shouldered nusket or dream
;, edol battle, cannot conceive of the aruor
begHching a novice in these matters He il
. ilR tanned tiger who first tastes of blood he
4 ne'oEnes from docility to be savage indeed
M early friend, Timothy Rakehandle, was an
holest boy, who could stow away as much
ored and butter, to say nothing of minneapolis.
asRny lad of his inches, and was much attach
edo the cows, turkies, and pigs, as clodhop-
PEI should be- He even sung psalms at the
pafsh church, in a most vllannus style of
psamody, and made love to his third cousin,
foiy, IN a very anti-theatrical manner In
dusrY presided over his days, and Cupid over
hE4lsS;Ssksnings, until he booat,s ..,e.ha, Of the
the trtsnp of war. He then became victim
TO military method-the barn, the scene of his
march, and countermarch. was his field of in
dustry ana Affection and Polly rued the day
"hen bayoIets were brought in fashion The
cows and tae sheep were his ideal enemies,
whom he charged, enfladed ambuscaded, and
( defeated, quite to the annoyance of patriarch
al ram who would fight any thiag but poker
Ish looking ducking gun Timothy swore ven
geance against an old dungtill, because he
crowed upon his roost, when he had discon,it-
ed his opponents, and poor chandelier paid the
DEBT OF nature in consequence OF the thrust of
bayonet from the arm and prowess of Tim.
cholce OF officers came round, and Tim
looked as ferocious an armed -hnoceros,
lifting his heels higher than his fellow soldiers
| IN march, and. always knowing his right hand
| from his left in a wheel or turn. The pound.
pound, THE bass drum always informed him
when to put his foot down, which was always
done az Though he was stamping upon the head
OF the serpent which tempted Eve Military
ardor ran along each nerve of his FRANC, and
he breathet the breath Of modern Creek
NJ cholcs came at last, and he was made
corporal. Did you ever see a young man who
was appointed to make a speech at cattle
show, or was complimented for his dancing
(lor the first time,) at ball or new select
man at country March meeting? or an Eng
llsh pumpkin elevated to a peerage2 If you
have, they were not half so exalted in their
own estllDltion, as was Tim in his, at his mill
taTy prombtlon. The oxen were dlsbanded,
because they would not march to the tune he
whistled the hogs were cut short in their ra-
tons, because they would not obey orders; and
the very sheep were muttoned, because they
proved towards when attacked by the house
dog. Every thing was military after the ap-
polntment, and but little C50iiity remained
Poor Polly was spoken to with military sa-
lutte, and her real afectonate inquiries answer
ed by an instruction ia the art of advancing by
eschelon. In the mean while, to accomplish
himself in fatigue duty, the sheep-pen became
his barrack, and h. regularly took his bread
and meat to his camp, not forgetting his ration
of grog, which was TO be drank in a soldier
IKE matl96Gt know how it was, but Polly dismiss
| ed him ; the farm failed to yield it's increase
| Tim coat became lackadisaical; the ration of
grog incfeased, and he now is private in the
regiment of the United States army, full of
military and bad whiskey. What a fine thing
! it is for our hardy yeomanry to turn soldiers,
because there is so much of necessity for it
about these days.
| VENTRILooUIsM. Among the low compan-
ions of the late Duke of Orleans was an Able,
who by this talent contributed to the amuse-
ment of his Highness. One Sunday that the
ducal family dined in the country, the Able
was left solitary, and at loss how to employ
his time, Calling hackney-coach in the
square adjoining to the palace, lac ordered it
to drive to st. Cloud. The coachman had
scarcely passed the barrier when he was as
tonlshed by three or four voices in his vehicle,
with mingled threats and cries of murder.
Stopping his horses, he descended, opened the
door, and saw nothing but our Able, who at
fected to sleep profoundly. Jehu, rubbing his
eyes, began to doubt of his ears, and even OF
his mental sanity, but drove quietly on, till
passing the gate, he entered the Bos dc Bou-
logne. Here he was again astounded by three
or four voices in his coach, but it was woman
defending herself from violence and again
descending, he found his fare fast asleep. To-
wards the middle Of the Bots de Boulogne, the
highway passes through deep sand, and the
carriaE les of course, are constrained to a slow
progress Here the Able gently opened the
coach-door, stepped on the sand, and retiring
obliquely behind, gained the nearest thicket,
where he dined at his ease, as he had conceal
ed cold chicken and a wicker bottle full Of
good wine Meanwhile the coachman pro-
cseds to St. Cloud, stops at the chief tavern
ahghts, opens his door, filings down the steps
and perceives that his carriage is void anc
empty Cursing his destiny on losing his fare
and such gainful day as Sunday is to the
tribe, he was obliged to refresh his horses, ant
eat a morsel, after which he returned in sor
row and dismay by the same route. The AbbC
was on the watch and with the same advant
aye of the sandy road approached from be
hind, and opening the door, gIided into thu
coach where he remained in great silence
till the driver stopped at the first stand in Par
$ ia eager to supply the loss of time bSt h
d WIS ready to lose what few senses he retained
when lie saw his fare pop his head out at tn
window and heard him exclaim, :" To tn
square where you took me up" He obeyed II
:, treat terror, and hat in hand let the Able de
/ scmd but when the money was offered h
hastily mounted his box and drove OF, roaring
No, no, Mr. Devil, | shall never damn IN
+; soul by taking your wages. Parts paper.
ANEcpoTE Not long since, in South Caro-
lima, Clergyman was preaching on the disc
IS hedience of Jonah when commanded to go an
n preach to the Ninevites After declalmlng a
j. some length on the awful consequence of dis
- obedience to tho Divine commands, he e1
1t claimed in a voice of thunder, that passe
rs through tho congregation like an electri
i shock, "and are there any Jonahs here
70 There was negro present, whose name wa
ID Jonah and thinking himself called on imm'
ID diately rose, and turning up his white eye
to the preacher, with his broadcast grin, and be
I'd bow, very readily answered, " Here be on
at .iISsa. - Wilmington Hordt6s
Or The following notice was lately posted IN
,e shop window in Worcester, (England)