American watchman and Delaware advertiser. [volume] (Wilmington, Del.) 1822-1828, 1827-08-14
ONE OF sHERIDAN,s STORIES.

SfucHt w SuTflsoH III malta. reluTIeH 10 t.S c0uU-
try on leave of absence; and, according to the
custom Of travellers, was fond of relating The won
ders he had seem Among other things, he one
day, III public coffee room, expatiated on the ex
celency OF living in general among the military.
Butt said he, as for the anchories, by the pow
ers! there is nothing to be seen like them in the
known world!
'Why, that is bold assertion said gentle
man present for | think England can boast Of
that article IN as great perfection as any country,
| if not greatcr.'
My dear sur replied the lrishman, you'il
pardon me for saying that your opinion is founded
on sheer ignorance of the iact--excuse my plain
spanking but you'd soon be of my way OF think
ing, 1t you saw the fruit growing so beautiful and
large, as have seen it many's the day.
Well done. Pat exclaimed his opponent, the
fruit growing so beautiful and large !-on tree,
| suppose? Come, you won't beat that, however,
DO you doubt the word of gentleman, sur =
retolted the officer.
doubt the fact, SIR answered the gentleman.
Then, by the powers! you only display your
own want OF understanding by SO doing; aud /
take it very uncvil Of you; for I've seen the an
chovies grow upon the trees with nv own G, es,
many's the hundred time; and beautiful ; the
grove OF them that the Governor has in his gar
den on the esplanade besides, the whole Of
the walls Of the fortress are completely covered
with them, all my brother officers could attest
at this present writing, were they here to the fore,
to do that same.
Upon my SOUL returned his opponent, laugh
ing heartily, you out IN melville even Sir John
himself-and he was nj hlncher ut fit. He it
was, believe, who asserted that oysters grew
upon trees on the Maabar coast but you give US
aachories ready picked, from the same source
Huzza for st. Patrick the days of miracles have
returned.'
! Then, SUR returned the Irishman. bridling
with anger, am to understand that you doubt
my word ?
You may understand, sir, what you please
but, though the license of travellers is generally
allowed to be pretty extensive, you must not sup
pose that gentlemen in this company are to be
crammcd with an absurdity palpable, as that OF
anchovies growing upon trees
1 AS much as to say, sur, in plain terms, that
have tould lie Say the word, sur, and am
satisfied. Pm not quarrelsome, sur, but, by my
sowl only say that and you had better been bori
without shoe tc your foot, or a shirt to your
back
Neither you, SIR returned the gentleman, nor
any other man shall compel me- to say that be
lleye that, which by nature is impossible
Then, sur, I'D beg leave TO address few words
to this honorable company; after which, as my We
racity and honor are concerned, both an officer
and gentleman-if you do not retIact your
words. and own your conviction that what have
said is true. shall insist on your meeting me il
another place, more conyanient, may be, for set
Ting disputes than this room.'
Go on, SIR said the gentleman.
! In the first place, then, gentlemen, upon my
honor and conscience! as have soul to be saw
e., and to escape the pains OF pursatory swea
by all the saints i'm the calendar and the dew
il himself to boot, that would scorn to tell false
: hood to man or mortal--thesc very eyes have, OF
ten thousand different occasions, seen the ancho
vies as plump as goosebe'ries, growing on ant
pucked from the trees in his Majesty's island ant
fortress of Malta. In the second place.
Impossible ? exclaimed his pertinacious oppo
nent 4 tell you to your face, and before thes
gentlemen, that you never saw any such thing
.Fhe lie directly the rod of st. Patrick
is more than Christian officer can bear: but III
keep myself cool for the honor of the corps: AM
I'd advise you, sur if you can't be aisy, that you
better be as aisy as you can; for if you spai
| such another dsrespectful and injurious word, IL
not call you out at all but, BY the powers III
smite your eve out on the spot. and plaster til
walls with your blood $50 YOU had better tax
care Of yourself and not be cantankerons m
dear honey. But, to return to my argument, sur
which you SO uncivilly interrupted; was goin
to observe in the second place, to yourself, that
is rule in the army, and more particularly in tn
honorable corps to which belong, that no gentle
man shall presume 10 doubt the word OF another
unless he can positive prove that he is wrong, an
that, too, on the spot Therefore, sur, even sup
pose had told you lie, you have no right, BY tn
laws Of honor, to challenge me with il; becaus
YOU niyer was at Malta at all, and of course coul
not see the thing with your own eyes. But, SUI
by way of conclusion TO my discourse, have I
remark to We, that you have not only insulted a
officer and gentleman, but an hishman there
fore trust that every one present will see that
have sufficient reason for requiring satisfaction.
Satisfaction pooh pooh! for what. toF
mere difference d opinion: Nonsense. = eSciaiia
| al several of the marty.