Literary cadet, and Saturday evening bulletin. [volume] (Providence, R.I.) 1826-1827, 1826-06-24
SCENE AT THE READING OF A WILL.

hs tHe tanners WluOW Waxeu sickly anu lnHTH,
she became enticng object for Mrs. Doldrum,
an inhabitant Of Leighton Buzzard, one of those
human screech owls who prowl about the abodes
Of misery and death, croakng out dismal tidings
and lowering over corpses. She seemed only hap
ny when surrounded by wretchedness, and her un-
deraker-like mind appeared to live upon DEATH
When she could not treat herself with dissolution,
she would look about her for broken leg, bank
ruptcy, family where there was dishonered
daughter, a runaway son, or any calamity she
could by good fortune discover.--"O my dear
friend" she exclaimed to Mrs. Pitman, short time
before her death, 81 am so delighted TO see you,
(hcre groan)-you know my regard for you,
(another groan)-seeing your bedroom shutters
closedI took it for granted it all over with you,
so came in to just to close your eyes and lay out
your body. Delighted to find you alive, (groan the
thrd)-let us be of good cheer, perhaps you may
yet linger out week longer, though it would be a
great release if il would please God to take you,
(groan the fourth)-And yet fear you sadly
prepared for the next world. (Groan the fifth and
lonsest) You know my regard for you. The
Lord be good unto us! Hark! is that the death
watch' certainly heard ticking.'
This consolatory parsonage was all alive the mo-
ment she heard Of Mrs. Pitmans death, which oc-
cured shortly after and she was obviously in her
proper element, when experimenting the closing of
window shutters, and all the minute arrangements
usually adopted upon such mournlul occasions
At her own particular request, she was INDUCED
with the privilege of sitting up with the body the
first night, and would not resign her station
reading of the will. Frank Millington had been
sent for express to attend this melancholy ceremo-
ny; Mr.. Swipes and Mr.. Currie were of course
present in deep mourning, with visages to match,
and each with white pocket handkerchief to hide
the tears which he feared he would be unable to
shed. Mr.. Drawl. the attorney, held the porten-
tous document in his hand, bristlng with seals and
two or three friends requested to attend
witnesses. The slow and precise man Of law. who
shared none OF his auditors impotence, was five
minutes in picking the locks of the seals, as many
more in arranging his spectacles, and having de-
liberatey blown his nose, through which he always
talked Gas if to clear the way) he at length began
his lecture As the will, at the old ladys particu
lar request had been made US short and simple
possible he had succeeded in squeezing it into six
large skins of parchment, which we shall take the
liberty OF crushing into as many lines Alter
lew unimportant legacies to servants and others, 1t
80, iol NJ tha pbnl of hor
personal and real, consisting of --h here
formidable schedule of houses, FARMS messuages,
tenements buildings. appurtenances, stocks, bonds,
monies, and possessions, occupying twenty minutes
in the recital, bequeathed to her dear cousins,
Samuel Swipcs of the Pond street brewery; and
Christopher Currie of the Market Place; Sad
dler.
Here Mr. Drawl laid down his parchment, drew
his breath, blew his nose, and began TO wipe his
spectacles, in which space of time Mr.. Swipes was
delivered ola palpable and contestabe snvel, in
getting up whereof he was mainly assisted by pre-
vous cold; and eudeavorng to enact a sob, which
however sounded more like gargling his throat, he
ejaculated-"G encrous creature! worthy woman
kind SOUL"
MIR. Currie, who though. it safer to be silently
overcome by his feelings, buried his face in his
handkerchief whence he finally emerged with in
disputably red and watery eyes, though it is upon
record, that he had been noticed that morning
grubbing about the onion bed in his own garden,
and had been seen to stoop down and pick some
thing up. They were both with an i'll concealed
triumph beginning to express to Frank their regret
that he had not been named, and TO inform him that
they could dispense with farther attendance, when
Mr. Draw with his calm nasal twang cried out
"Pray, gentlemen keep your seats, have not done
yet;" and resumng the parchment and his posture,
thus proceeded-"Let me see, where was Il Ay
Samuel Swipes, OF Pond Street Brewery, and
Christopher Currie Of Market Place, Saddler, and
then raising his voice, to adapt it to the large Ger
man Text words that came next, he sang out--'Tn
trust for the sole and exclusive and benefit OF
my dear nephew, Frank Millington, when he shall
nave attained the age Of twenty-five years, by
which time hope he will have so far reformed his
evil habits as that he may safely be intrusted with
the large fortune which ] hereby bequeath to
him."
"What's all this'' exclaimed Mr.. Swipes, "You
don't mean that we're humbugged? Ia trust9 how
does that appear where is it," Mr.. Drawl, depo-