American watchman and Delaware advertiser., 1826-09-05
Volume ".
From the Boston .aonthty Magazine.
CONFESSIONS OF A COUNTRY SCHOOL
MASTER.

lgutar." NJ \. Lit. Ga=.
The ssfYerrngs Of country school masters have
been so often given TO the public, that !, whose
mot tai career has certainly been shortened, it not
sweetened, by the delightful ask,o resolved at
one time not to : renew the sad refine nembrance OF
my fate,' but to let speedy oblivion those
cssmitIes. 6 all OF which saw and, less fortu-
nate than Eneas, : all which was.' My story,
/ feared, would be treated like The certificates of
our modern beggars. Public sympathy is nearly
exhausted by the drafts already made upon it by
that degraded class Of beings to which belong,
and any more from the same quarters ere liable to
be protested. The following circumstan.e altered
my resolution. Catching upon an old newspaper
the other day in fit OF ennOi, summoned energy
enough to pcruse, for the third time. The pathetic
tale of fellow pedagogue, which had attracted
much notice on its first appearance, and is eyldenily
the production Of a nasterty pen. BY this i, seems
he was actually in peril Of dying an hungered.
What starvation in country town OF New Eng
land? The leading idea OF this piece now struck
me as palpsble ahsurdity To all his assertions,
my own experience gave the lie direct. The win
ming pathos OF this wtiter his admirable h6mot,
and the destinations Of his style in general, all con-
spire to make upon the reader deep but incorrect
impression of the manner in which our country
people treat the master."--To effaee this is my
present object Novelty have none to otier-ar-
tifce scorn-e eloquence ne'er sat upon my lips.
my sole attractions are misery and truth.
AT the close Of the year 1925, my diabolcal des
tiny sent me 10 IL, village on the sea coast OF
a New England State, inhabited by certain amphlb,-
ous bipeds, who call themselves farmer fishermen.
i Here | had contracted TO spend eight wntry weeks
H. cultivating whatever of intellect there might be
in forty FIVE children (if they claim the nancy
| OF both sexes. Fool that was as II the young
idea'' could shoot winter more than any other
weed, and that too in soil Of the consistency OF
granite. But few DAYS of fruitltss hogging
| f.m mtt,,... n. 1t,s
ones aft. cted by that exerciseaDd employ my ter.
ole ruling the writing books instead Ct the schol-
ars and did desis after, upon discovering
that my meri instructor were estimated by my
clemency TO the pupls-lhat is to say, my popular
ity with the children, and, which is natural conse-
quence in IL, with their parents, was in the in
verse ratio OF the fapeations dispensed One great
point already gained; but another OF equal
magniSnde, though in cheering state Of progress
sion, remained to be fully accompllshed namely, TO
render my yself agreeable member OF the family
where happened to board. This is no less essen
tal to complete success, than to spare the rod and
spoil The child. In justice to myself, however, it
should here be remarked, that am free from the
guilt of fulfilling the latter half Of Solomon's max
i'm for the children all spoiled TO my hand.
The second important qualification OF country pre-
cepior is, that he be able to demolish any given
quantity of provisions This is indispensable. Our
country people never starve the master, though ]
admit with the most cheerful aacrlty. that they
may sometimes stuff him to DEATH Among them
no absternious man can be favori,e. Whoever as
se'ts the contrary, either wiluy missepresenis,
is deporsbly ignorant. The NAV of lchabod Crane,
I that pink OF pedagogues, we are told, possessed
Is the duting powers OF an Anaconda and The
consequence was. that he eat himself into the. good
graces Of all the Sleepy Hollow. In like manner,
no teacher can be popular in H II he have net
the appetite oil shark The agents house, at
which tarried night and morning was mile and
a halt distant from the anatomy OF building where
my pupils daily assembled to shiver--Dn With ter
ror, bui with cold-for 1.-The birch consumed in
school was consumed by the fire. and have the
satisfaction 10 know that. as il was never employed
to produce heat by impulse, IT never yielded any
at sensible distance. But, mile and halt was
too far to lrave! for dinner. l was, therefore,
kindly permitted to dine at Mrs Dnnning's, in he
vicinity Of the hoo house. The hrst forenoon
was spent in an idle attempt to learn forty FIVE
christian, would say barbarous names, compared
with which, the names of Oliver Cromwelfs Jury
dwindle into absolute proprieiy. Al twelve clock
| retfeaed to Mrs. Dunning's, whe,e hearty
welcome waited me. Dinner shortly appeared
but, as this is the meal, that In weeks lime, had
we'll nigh sunk me into the grave. it merits par
ticuar description 1t will be sufficient to enumer
ate The articles spread before me The first ocea
sion for l say to the reader, :" ex uno disco
omnes" which is, being interpreted, there was
no variation during twenty eight days. First, came
on an unknown quantity OF tea contained 10 coffee
pot that might have served for moderate sized
| lighthouse. Secondly, plate of what Mrs. Dun-
ming with apparent sincerity, called sliced pork
but Mat l suspected, from its color and tenaciy,
to be gum elastic. This was followed by quart
bowl OF real pork in a stae Of fusion. Some one
had previously Told me, BY way OF encouragement,
that all chool masters lived upon the fat of the land.
Alas the amhiguly of languagr--tiil now have
never understood this expression On ore corner
| IL. L. nriira would hal