Martinsburgh gazette. [volume] (Martinsburgh, Va. [W. Va.]) 1810-1825, 1824-02-05
Yes Sir.
and a glass Of
Yes Sir
IRnss..g
Yes Sir.

Now you have the entire use OF q
large parlour. And, IN signliicatlofi
of your importance, instead OF wear
| ing three tails, like a bashaw, you SIT
in three chairs, at time, like gen
tleman. You put one or two of your
feet on the andirons, the table, OF the
jdmb. You walk, trot, or run about
the room, and in the loneliness Of
your Independence, jump over the
sideboard, or break the china.
But al! lIInan felicity is liable 10
interruption; for most probably ira
weller, more cold and hungry than
yourself, will present himself in your
room, and deposit himself in chair
by tire fire This, ns doubt, is
contempt Of the royal prerogative.--
You will accordingly cast superciliors
smiles Of contempt upon his face and
appearances; thrust both hands in
your pockets, and whistle with great
| energy and effect. And, in token of
mortal defiance, you will take pinch
| Of snuff in The most resolute manner
that can be conceived of, the conse-
| quence Of which will make the 'wel-
kin ring" again. But the enemy is not
TO be so easily dislodged; he will so.
iicit the favour Of your snaff box, and
return the salutation with force that
make
| "The rocks, and hills, and dales ressdnd."
Being disappointed in this mode OF
warfare, you will come to a sort OF
cessation Of arms with your discourte-
Gus adversary, and by way of concilfa-
iion he will perhaps say
| Bad travelling, Sir.
Hum.
| What news?
Hum with gentcel sneer)
| Are you the Landlord?
The Landlord, Sir?
Yes, the Landlord, Sir? Ysu seem
to be at home:-just bring me hot
cut!.-
A hot cut! a hot cut! You stride
the room with marvellous dignity, and
"being rash and very sudden in
choler," YOU ring the bell with an i'm.
posing violence-while your tormen-
tor regards you with look of logged
complacency. The landlord enters.
With proud sense of superiority you
point to your unwelcome guest; and
your unwclcome guest, bowling pro
foundIy, apologies for his mistake
| by saying, how strange it was that he
should take you for the n,Gstcr Of the
Inn!
Perhaps you will feel the ceilings
and arrows" Of wounded vanity, and
resolve for the future to remember
that in tavern every one is our
equal, and equally entitled, as travel
lers, to "half the road"
BY and by, supper being on the ia
Bile, every agreeable feeling is resto-
red, and you do usual justice to the re-
past-Your company of "six" grow
pleasant at your expense. Every jest
smacks of the attic. Song succeeds
to song, and the mind is pleasinsly
bewildered by the smartness of the
wit--the transparent volumes of the
smoke and the witching enchantment
Of the wine. You lose all the money
in your pocket at the card table which
adds zest to the enJoyments of the
evening. Being entirely secure from
the of1iciousness5 and intrusion of the
,0omGnkind, you drink your wine with
a merry heart, and puff your "Indian
weed" with frightened countenance.
When ''ihe good wine has done its
good Office" you compose your head
in longitudinal direction across the
arm or back of the chair, and go com.
posedly to sleep. Upon awaking you
find yourself without any other com,
pany than a few pleasantly confused
ideas, very moderate head ache, and
very moderate Iauern Bill.