Martinsburgh gazette. [volume] (Martinsburgh, Va. [W. Va.]) 1810-1825, 1824-05-13
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From the Recreative Magazine.

| FROM the iSecrehli'e MaSdZltle.
Modes of Expression 81 is We
ry hard, my lord, said a convicted
| (.lon at the bar to Judge Burnet, ''to
hang poor man for stealing horse. .
You are rot to be hanged, sir, answer
ed The Judge, for stealing a horse, but
you are to be hanged that horses may
not he stolen = -
Pi ecision. - Siurrn calculates, that
there are thousands of insects in a
crumb of bread. And Masezleu says
he has seen living animalculsc TWEEN,
ty seven millions of times smaller than
mites; And, as life g light are con-
comltant ideas, Niewentypt has com,
puted that, in IA second OF a min
Ute, there escapes out of a burning
candle particles Of light ten millions
of millions of times more than the
number of the grains of sand compu-
ted to be contained in the whole earth.
PiOels Liberties.-In a funeral ser
mon found in large folio volume, emit
/ lied the Last Actions OF a Portuguese
Duke ofCadaval, there is an extraordi
ia yburst ofpious eloquence. Theprea
cher thus apostrophizes the grave:
20 grave! art thou not ashamed! dost
thou not blush, 0 grave! to devour so
noble a personagew.'
Nicknames.-Tha facetious Mr..
Bancroft told his friend,- Mr.. Van.
Sittart esVour name ic e,cb a lopn
one, / shall drop the sittast, and call
you Pan for the future" with all
my heart (Said he;)hy the same rule
shall drop croft, and cali you Bear.
Mr.. Gerard Hamilton got the name
of Single speech Hamilton, from the
circumstance OF his having made but
one, in the British parliament
Physicians "A rich Valctudinarian
called in physician for a slight dis
order The physician felt his pulse,
and enGuired, Do you eat well? Yes,
said the patient / do. Then, said
the Esculapius, ] shall give you some
thing to take away all that.
, DR.. Mandy, of Canterbury, DR..
Radcliffe, and Dr.. Case, spen
ding an evening together, were very
jovial "Here, brother Case" saws
DR.. Radcliffe, Sis a health TO the fools,
your patients. I thank you, good
BROTHER" replied Case, "let me have
ALI fools, and you are heartily vel.
come to the rest of the practice"
! DR. Moore (another OF Zeluco) used
to say that, 'Atleast two thirds Of a
physicians fees were for imagin
AIRY complaints Among several in.
stances of this nature, he mentions
! one of a clothier, who after long drink
, ing the bath waters, took it into his
head to try the Bristol hot wells. Pre-
vious, however, to stealing of, he re-
| quested the favor of him of letter,
stating bis case to any brother Galen
This done, the patient got into chance
and started. After proceeding about
half way, he felt an itch to pry into
the contents ofthe letter, when the fol.
lowing words presented themselves
"Dear sir, the bearer f.a fat Wiltshire
clothier: make the most of him Ii is
unnecessary to add, that his cure was
. at that moment effected, as he order.
ed the chaise to return, and imIncdi
ately proceeded home.
ASSASSINATION The reason the
King of Naples assigned for not put
ting down the horred practice of pr:
vate assassinationin bis kingdom is Gu
rious. "At present, (said the monarch
Hose five thousand Of my subjects IAN
nually) by assassination: if, therefore. l
were toput to death everylassassin l
should lose double that number.
Pontoppiden, the historian of Nor
way, relates, that the Italian prac
tice of privately stabbing, prevailed at
one time TO sueh degree among the
Norwegians, that wife was ever pre-
pared for such an event, by carTging
her husbands Shroud dbout her,
when they attended together a wed,
ding feast, or any other merry max
ing.