The Wilmingtonian, and Delaware register., 1824-08-12
From the Trenton Empmium.
PLAQUES OF MATRIMONf.

PLAQUES OF MATRIMOAf.
GA hopeless lot Of husbands, on my life"
1t was general training day, and with scarce
lv AN exception, every good wife in the village
was left in sole possession other domicil for
i'll the country, few, either economical or
spend thift husbands, neglect the opportunity
ofsaving their fines by personal appearance
on the field of acton-and as the male part
of the several households were not to be OK
pcctcd home until late in the evening, an
idea by some means crcpt into the brain of
the antiquatcd widow lady, Mrs. Gray, who
lived at the lower end ofthc street, to get her
neighbours together, that they might talk
over the concerns of the neighbourhood, and
right what was seemingly wrong in domestic
matters by general conference, over toast and
tea, and some fine current wine and cake, of
which she was always famed for keeping the
very best.
Tabby Gray was the oracle of the village:
her ear was made the depository of nine
tcnths of the complaints which her female
friends vended-and the reader will perhaps
be Il little astonished to learn that at least
ninc-tcnths of these self same complaints,
even in the peaceful, well-mannercd, and old
fashioned hamlet of the Willows, lay against
--Husbd1ds. Such was the fact, however,
and thus it came that, i'll her mothcrly care
over the peace and comfort Of fherncighbours,
she made an especial resolve, that this meet
ing should be composed of such, and such
only, as had, at some time or other, express
sed to her some manner of dissatisfaction
with the matrimonial moose into which their
necks had slipped, through various devices,
of those sly rogues and Hymcn, SO termed in
fashionable circles.
An hour or two after dinner, therefore, all
the discontcnted wives within a mile square,
were assembled at Mrs. Gray good
old lady, with a somewhat magistci'al air,
which, perhaps, the consciousness of her long
and, undisputcd reign ofsupcriority had Civ
en- her, sat at the head of the room, with a
smile of openness which banished reserve,
and, an ear attcntiveiy bent, seeming at once
to invite the free communication of scnti-
ment, and to promisca sage corrective appli-
cation.
After TIC weather, and the dust, and q
few illwishes to trainings and training days,
with some other small matters connected
with the village affairs, were disposed Of,
every tongue went to work, pell NELL dis
cussing the subject for which they had assem-
blcd.
plant against her husband Bill, whose pro-
pcnsity to romp about with the young girls,
she had been trying three long years to
break, without success, and whose company
she had long thought he preferred to hers
| All said Mrs. Dawson, you may well put up
with that if he behaves dcccntly when at
| home one would think to sec and hear him
abroad, that there was not a better tenn
pcred fellow in the village than Harry Daw-
son, but after iiddling among all the neigh
bours until night, he comes home, hangs up
his fiddle and his hat together, and smile is
no more seen upon his face till nc takes
them down again. Yoa could put up with
any thing but ill-nature said an old tat wo-
man in the colncr--why, I'd never open
nv mouth about an ilI-naturcd husband---Pd
match him--I'd tire him out of that ; | wish
YOU had my husband, who laughs from
morning to night, and is SO easy and good
naturcd, that every body imposes on him,
| I'd rather have drunkard than such tcl-
low, if had again to choose between two
evils. To hear ones husband called soft
Dickson--Sawney Dickson--and all such
| kind of things, is misery unbearablc-but
! that is not all Dickson is just as hcadstrong
as the old Harry not knowing that am the
better hand at managing a bargain, he never
even cOnSultS me docs all TIC DusiilesS III MS
own foolish way, and never p,eases me i'll
single thing he does. Still, said little crum-
ped up dame at her side, think, between
you and me, you have much the best side of
the bargain. Ny husband, for all the world, is
equal to yours in every thing, but industry ;
he is as good naturcd, as careless. and all
out, as stupid but its intolerable hard for
women to have her own and her husbands
work all OH her shoulders. Tom does nothing
but hammer away in the shop; have to
settle his accounts, collect his money, pay his
debts and make his bargains in the name of
heaven, no woman, i'll her right senses, ought
to crave such Il life.
Here then in this circle the matter had come
down to a point. These good danes were
mated to sprightly husband, a surly hus-
band; good natured busy imbecile, and
good natured idle imbecile, and each was
heartily dissatisfied. In another corner ano-
ther group discussed other qualities with as
discontented an air and tone.
One had gambler: she wished almost
that he might be hung. Another a tipler:
she was even more lavish other wishes, One