Elizabeth-Town gazette. [volume] (Elizabeth-Town, N.J.) 1818-1821, 1821-01-30
/" You HAN'r GOT THE PITCH.

From the Berkshire Star.
"YoU HAN'T GOT THE PITCH.
When was about eighteen years old
! attended singing school. ! eanno,
indeed, say what was my motive iD al
tending forI knew no more, and do no
now, about fats aud sharps, and tones ant
semi.toaes than parrot But possibly
] was attracted, as may hap some now. a
Idays are. by The blaze oil beauty wiicl
There flashed upon the heart, and rouset
TO birth the embryo loves that nestle il
1.-The youthful bosom. On the whole, thi,
mast have been the fact. But still pre-.
tended to learn music, and had seat a
mong the counter; and, 10 my own opinion
at least, could crack aud galIop along e.
quail 10 The best Of them. ID singing The
times Of Mortified. New Durham, &c
those very sublime specimens Of sacred
harmony, SO exactly adapted 10 the sweet
voices Of the cornfeid choir, that 8 wakes
10 melody the morn oil spring.
Some how or other. one evening, my
mind being fixed rather on Miss Hannah
who sat near me, than my tune. made
SO singular sound that the whole school
uoticed it, and the teacher waving 10 ST.
lence with bis hand, and stamping like
thunder, vociferously exclaimed, I. You
|han't got the pitch.''
Let the singing singers, with vocal voices,
In sweet yocfefation, out vociferate
Even sound itsef----."
He began and again began; and again
(" You Ian't got the pitch = donbly thun-
dere1 in my ears. A third attempt was
made, and soon tie boys began to laugh,
the girls TO giggle, the master frowned,
and You han't got the pitch reverbe-
rated in tenfold peaIs through my ears.
| was al length Disconnected, ant! got away
as soon as could, giving up all hope Of
ever being able 10 rival Handel OF Ha-
dyn 10 the science of music. But did
not give up Miss Hannah for the very
next sunday night, neatly rugged as could
be, went TO see and spark il with her.
/ found her alone, aud only wanted
courage to plump the matter TO her al
once. Soon, however, after few qua
yers and seml,qS %s epfaaasadless v q hffH e
weather, though it happened 10 be a very
stormy evening, as we'll out doors as IN
my own mind, I musterd courage 10 put
the question to her that so long had clicked
me. She smiled, adjusted her corset,
primmed up, looked a look that | never
shall forget, casting a glance from my
head 10 feet at length with much COM
placency drily Observed" You ban't
got the pitch" did not attempt the
tune again, but scampered home, whist
ling g Exhoriation' by the grave yard,
aud fully convinced that 1 neUer could
Get the pitch.
From my own sad experience, | was
led TO notice others, and observe how
they succeeded 10 pitching their tunes !:
aud 10 fact, it was 10 small consolation TO
my wounded pride 10 find that half the
world succeeded no better than myself.
Now there was our neighbours son Bob /;
he, forsooth, must go to college, and
through course Of legal studies, and then
what why, he went into court, began
his tune, aud at the very first onset,
G You han't got the PITCH" sounding
from the bench, blasted his every hope Of
ever being able TO acquire legal repu-
tation. He had pitched his tune too
high. His brother John also pitched too
high by half, when he sold an excellent
farm and set up as a merchant. lie got
through bis tune, however, though short
one, and came to full close bat there
was no repeat. have known handles Of
both genders pitch their tunes SO eyre
giously wrong, sometimes clear above the
leger line, that they had to stop and begin
again an eighth lower at least than the
rest Of the singers. have known a
dandyess in the ball room, exert herself SC
much to win the attention Of stupid
dandy, after ogling him long hour OF
two to no purpose, that at length she faint
ed in the arms of friend, with her cheeks
still glowing 10 cosmetic pride, merely
because her corsets would not contain the
lusty respirations excited by her labor Of
love. This my cousin Semibreve would
call fuge. Aud the same omnivoca
cousin says, that when ministers dabblt
10 politics to the neglect Of their sacred
calling, they are SO far from having lht
necessary pitch, they had better leave
the sacred desk, and 60 toPITcH-iag hay
They pitch too low.
i I have known--bnt gentle reader, they
must all fail to get the pitch. Yet lie
me hope, that, guided by the precepts o
piety and virtue, you will, if you hav'
not already, get the pitch, the right pitch
and you can then without any difficulty
!: 60 through the whole tune; aud will al
!, forwards be invited to join that choir {
singers whose choristers shall be angels