Elizabeth-Town gazette. [volume] (Elizabeth-Town, N.J.) 1818-1821, 1820-09-12
Progresses OF SIGNS
Or tho ,vavs Of telling a Story.

vi Sf0V sDt.tC ~ t1ets'tS - Cs~f
King James vi. on removing to Lon
don, was waited upon by the Spanish
Ambassador, man of erudition. but who
had CROCHET In bis head that every
country should have a professor Of signs,
TO teach him and the like of him to I'M
.derstand one another. The ambassador
was Iamenting one day, before the king,
,iiis great iesiieratun throughout al! Eft
rope, when the king, who was a queer
sort of man, says TO him--ss why,
have professor of signs in the northern
most college in my domiDions, viz. at Alb
|erdeen; but it is vast way off. perhaps
600 miles" aWere 1t ten thousaDd leagues
off shall see him." says the ambassador,
6 and am determined to set out in two or
three days. The King saw he had GEN.
United himself, and writes, or causes &c
lbe written to the University Of Aberdeen
Istating the case and desiring the professor.
| TO put him off some way, OF make the besi
|of him. The ambassador arrives, is re-
ceived with great solemnity; bat soon
began to enquire which Of them had the
honor to be Professor of Signs? and being
told that the Professor was absent in the
Highlands, and would return, no body
could say when: says the ambassador,
:" will wait his return thought il were
twelve months" Seeing that this would
not do, and that they had him TO entertain
at great expense all the while, they
contrived stratasem. There was one
Geordy, butcher, blind of an eye, a
droll fellow, with much wit and roguery
about him. He is got, told the story aud
instructed 10 be Professor Of Signs, but
got 10 speak on pain Of dealh! Geordy
undertakes it. The Ambassador is now
shown into Geordy's room, aud left TO con-
verse with him as well as he could, the
whole of the Professors waiting the issue
with fear and trembling. The Ambassa-
dor holds up one Of his fingers to Geordy
-Geordy holds up two of his ;-the Am
bassador holds up three; Geordy cienches
his fist and looks stern. The Ambassador
then takes an orange from his pocket, and
holds it up; Geordy takes piece Of bar
ley cake from his pocket, and holds that
|up. After which the Ambassador bows to
him and retires to the other Professors, who
auxiousIy enquire his opinion Of their bro
Their. He is perfect miracle, says the Am
basssdor, would not give him for the
wealth Of the Indiesi Well, say the Pro-
fessors, to descend to particulars. Why, says
the Ambassador, i first held up one finger,
denoting that there was one God he held
up two, Simplifying that these are Father
and Son; / held up three, meaning Fa-
Their, Son and Holy Ghost; he clenched
his fist, TO say that these three were one
I then took out an orange, signifying the
goodness Of God, who gives his creatures
not only The necessaries but the Injuries
of life ;--upon which the wonderful man
presented piece Of bread, showing it was
the staff Of life. and preferable TO every
luxury. The Professors we're very glad
that matters had turned out so we'll ; so
having got quit of the Ambassador, they
next got Geordy TO his version Of the
signs. Well, Geordy, how have you
come on. and what think you Of your
man The rascal, said Geordy, what did
he do first, think ye? He held up one
finger, as much as TO say you have got
but one eye. Then / held up two, mean
ing that my one eye was perhaps as good
as both of his. Then the fellow held up
three Of his fingers, to say there were but
three eyes between us; aud then / was so
mad at the sconndrel that l steekd my
ineive, and was to come whack on the