Elizabeth-Town gazette. [volume] (Elizabeth-Town, N.J.) 1818-1821, 1818-09-22
MISCELLANY.
From the Connecticut Couraas.
THE BRIEF REMARKER.

Il
1T is common saying in the world,
that there are but few happy marriages;
and doubiy deplorabIe would be the con
dition OF mankind, were it altogether
true. 1t is true, however, only in a
qualified or limited sense.
Il What! is marriage, ia itself consider
ed, source of wretchedness rather than
of veal !? Do they who marry, change
I their condition generally for the worse !?
& Are the married, for the most part, less
happy than the unmarried? So it is not !;
nor will any assert it but the profane and
licentious, or the inconsiderate. Yet,
after all, but few marriages are ufqy hap
by, and why ? 1t is not for lack of ex-
/ cellence in the institution, nor because the
! connubial state is not in itself conducive
to human comfort and veal. Elsewhere
lie the reasons; of which some will be
included in the following particulars.
l. 1t often happens that too much is
expected beforehand. In none of the con.
ditions or relations of this life, is unal-
Logged happiness the lot of man and, by
consequence, those who indulge the un-
reasonable expectation of finding it in the
Connubial state must inevitably drink of
the bitter cup of disappointment.
2 Since the fall, the intercourse of
connubial life is never (such as it print
lively was) between persons OF perfect
innocence and virtue; but il is, in all
cases, betwixt those who are frai, infrm
of mind, and more or less defective in
heart. Now it is for want of duly con-
i sideriDg this matter before their marriage,
that great many couples are unreasona
bly, vexed at the infirmities, failngs, and
petty faults which they perceive in each
other afterwards, charging upon wedlock
the disappointment that originated III the
Illusions of their own fancies.
8. As in other contracts, so in that OF
Il marriage, the parties too often deal I'M
fairly with one another. by artiulIy con
cealing their personal defects, and affect
ing qualities of which they are devoid.
That ornament of human nature, as
we'll as Of the society Of Friends, to which
he belonged namely, DR.. FothergiI, Of
3 London--a man alike distinguished for
parts and learning, and for benevolence
and piety-beins informed that a gentle
man at house where he visited was pay
ing his addresses to young lady, desired
leave TO offer to him piece of advice.
Upon the gentleman making bow of SUBJ
: mission" Friend,'' said the shrewd ply
stefan, "my advice il this--that thou
shouidest court in thy every day clothes .
"The Doctor" as observes his COM
mentator, " unquestionably did not mean
that the sentiment he delivered should be
confined to the article of dress. He ID
tended to insinuate that the man who is
paying his addresses (and by parity OF
reason, the lady also who is receiving
them) should exhibit themselves TO each
other such as they usually are; and
should not endeavour to wear, for the
time. more favourable character than
will be found ordinarily to belong to
them"
What deal of matrimonial disappoint-
ment aud strife might be prevented, if,
while the treaty were going on both the
addressers and the addressed would appear
in their euery day clotkes-or in no better
characters for temper and disposition, or
for any attractive or estimable quality,
than such as they we're determined to
maintain, 10 the connubial state, through
out their lives.
A. The little oblising attentions which
are the food Of friendship, and without
which close and ardent friendship can
hardly be kept alive for any long while,
are too often RENTED after marriage, aud
even discontinued. And hence, without
any fragrant fault on either side, GOODNESS
arises, then indifference, and finally al
ienation.
5. Among the higher classes, marriage,
in too many instances, is the cold, calcu'