Alexandria daily gazette, commercial & political. [volume] (Alexandria [Va.]) 1808-1812, 1811-04-20

= i men Nary liio oohh = -, ~,
/ to be-" NUN - "
{. Rr11. the male of black cattle Pope,s Edlct /;
p'' En.ick.
Bu11, one of the twelve signs OF the Zodiac.
0'D' Johnson.
Jopy Bull, the representative OF the MaJes'
.ty OF the people of England,
Eagz,orth.
THESE are all very good definitions, that
;s. when the e are none better but II any per-
con wishes 70 see first rate definition 81 this
word let him read the works or the learned
Hum WHAvG, who was the contemporary u
Confusion or, as a Frenchma.r would pro-
.nouncc it, Conju-zi-on; or as he IS no" cohi-
monty called CoNFUc!Us. When HUM
Whang was asked, g What IS a bull e ne all
swcred, " male COW and this, IN my apih-
ion, is the best definition of the word that mas
ever been given because it is an excellent ouii
itself, and therefore amounts to no more than
this, that bull is bull.
So when cobler was once asked, what IS
pain He caught the intcrrlg;itor by the nose
with his pincers, which gave MIN more
sensible idea Of pain, than it he had spoken Oh
the subject with the eloquence OF Cicero or
Demosthenes.
The best definition, then. that can be given
Of bull, is to make one; but nevertheless II
is necessary to bear in mind, the remark OF the
sage Hum Whang: :.
g Cha gueh, q ysSds !; cScon tn, es winch
is as much as to Say, that an eEhresS'on 7'h'ch
svould be a eathal 5uN, if used by an I'1sh1Han
7yould be PASSED over unnoticed, had 1t come
from, tie mouM orten Of an Enshshman.
An example will serve TO illustrate this -
An Irishman seeins.a large iron roller IN a
field in Engl .ad, observed that he had ne
yer seen such large iron rolling stone be-
fore.
Now, if this be true, land true it must be,
for it is copied from one OF John bulls Jest
books, and Johnny is very fond OF jest books,
and has, moreover, great MANY OF thenl) Il
was certainly ali GORGEOUS blunder; put why
ha. not Johnny introduced the following lines
from Pope, into some of his jest books!
F." And hen,n,'d with bristcd spears, the Gre
clans stood,
A brazen bu!wark, and an iron WOOD
N1ad, bsok xvii.
The reason is, that Epglisnrnen are in a
manner priviledged to make LIunders without
being laughed at for them.
Addison notices manv Of MIton's plumbers,
but calls them only little bicnlishes; ard
quotes Horace, who charges ali such errors to
I" har6ouqbLe nadocrtency;" but on no account
vii! Sir John allow this pardon TO be extended
to the Irish.
GA boat YOUR honor, is thing that people
sit down in when they walk across the rivcr."
Pat
@Mails and other coaches to all parts Of he
United Kingdom J'hn 6nA
At the first Of these bulls, Johnny would al
most split his sides with laughter, but he
would let the second pass unnoticed; never
considering that Ireland is part OF the Uni
ted Kingdom, and that it would be as difficult
for him to drive mail coach across the chan
mel. as i, would be for Pat to walk across the
river.
Many more examples might be given to
shew the truth OF Hum Whang's assertion !;
but for the present we shall omit them, and
proceed to notice another beautiful and equal
" correct remark, Of this truly great Philoso-
pher. -,
I. Dues chop, ache, esqne quotas which,
literally translated, means, fhat 6nls 0nd
bLundtrs are mt confined to any nation or fseo-
file. According to custom, we will proceed
to make this self evident.
A student at Cambridge, calling upon a
friend, and observing in his chamber large
quantity of oranges, enquired " what he could
want 50 many for 20 &c To make lemonade Of
them" was the answer. The author of the
above perfect ball was all Eng!ishman of high
classical attainnents.
A Scotch farmer sent his man Donald to
market, with load OF ray. Donald. on the
way, overlook distiller, who was carrying
key of whiskey, ard engaged, for the COM
pensation Ola shilling, to conceal it in his load
of hay 1t was not, however, concealed so
well as to prevent an excise officer from de-
tecting and scizing it. together with the horse
and load Of hay, which he took to his own
house, where Donald made the following elo-
ouent and moving address to him: We may
tax the wh;skey, Sir, an the dell gang wi it;
out dinna TAX my masters horse, or he'll put
me in gaol before ever leave this house"
Directions inscribed on WEIGH finger
post This road is no road, he that cannot