Alexandria daily advertiser. [volume] (Alexandria [Va.]) 1803-1808, 1805-05-31


Mr.. Pren.is, tie sarcastic editor of the
Virginia Gazette, has sad trick of a
musing himself and his readers at the
expence of his neighbor, the editor Of
the Richmond Enquirer, a young man
who seems to have his brain confused by
inmbie of crude aud absurd notions,
which he mistakes for philosophy. The
following is happy specimen OF Mr..
Prentis's saterical manner.
&U. S. Gaz.)
We have before hinted, we are now more
than ever convinced that the genius of the
editor of the Enquirer, is not adapted to
politics; but rather calculated to surprise
us with its great powers in philosophical
facts and theories. The editor OF the En-
quirer introducing the melancholy account
Of the loss of the ship Jupiter. by ice OF
the Grand Bank. commences with the
three following correct and profound OBJ
servations So
!. Ii would be well for the adventurous
seamen if the large glaciers of ice which
sare accumulated round The poles, would
remain in the latitudes where nature had
formed them. I'm this situation they might
Indeed effect the climate Of the continents,
by cooling the winds which blow over the m.
.Hnts they would never disturb the safety
oi the seaman, unless he himself should
visit the frozen oceans, where they are
formed, Ia search of the whale, or the
seal Yes, vastly better than on politics
does Mr.. Rltche reason here; and every
word is true. First he tells us (and il is a
factl that if the ice should always remain
at the poles, it would never come away.
from there 20 disfesh the seamen Next
we gre told that the ice makes the wind
cold and after, if,thc seaman should not
60 to the ice at the poles ne would be
safe. The substance of the whole is this
Ice is of cooling nature; but if the sea-
man does rot SO near the ice, nor the ice
come to the seamea, then the semen will
not be disturbed bv the ice and, viceper-
sa. the ice viii not be disturbed by the sea-
man; which circumstance win be very for
tunate both for the ice and the seaman.
SO much for close reasoning on facts !:
the concluding remarks are theoriticaI.
Is DR.. Barwin in his Botanic Garden
hasvery fancifuly observed, tha, il The ma
tions Of Europe, instead Of destroying
their ceamep, and e1haus,ing their wealth
in unnecessary wars, could be induced to
unite their labors to navigate these i'm
mense masses of ice into the southern
oceans, trvo great advantages would resul,
to mankind the tropical countries would
be much cooled by their solution, and the
winters of Europe would be rendered
much milder, for perhaps a century or two,
till the masses Of ice should once more be.
come enormous. The philosophical poet
has forgotten to mention as another advan-
tage, that fatal accidents are prevented"
&c.
Editor Enquirer.
What plan! worthy Of Goodwin, Of
T. NJ. Randolph, or any philosopher Of
the new school. Now what il Mr.. Rit.
chic should go to Europe aad propose
this plan to the con,ending nations there s.
what ought not to be his reward, if a..
dopted? Instead offs wasting their wealth
IN unnecessary wars let the coateuding al
mics and navies unite Ike BROKERS, and al,
so to the northern latitudes and procure
ice islands of SO or 90 miles in length,
and IS ,.aviga,c" them to the West Indies
which would be :. much cooled by their
solution - and the, g winters Of Europe
and If North America would be much
milderfor perhaps century Or tuo''e!!
Yes, let them only take away all the
ice at the poles, and carry it to the torrid
zone, and the dairy maids in Martinique.
Guiana, &c. will be allie to keep their but
ter cool in summer; and the nsr.h pole,
now covered with Andes of ice, would
yield wine, lemons, pine apples, &c. in
abundance. Procure some substitute for