The enquirer. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1804-1815, 1804-08-04

| Cb5aPenk,-Bay, June 10, 1904.
REVIEW.
| Some mention Ui0de IN tie PAPER bcforet6e
! iaG, ottbe author ofa nezv Poem, caLied'' Ter
ribhe Tr09or0tiou, by CT iRobber CavRic,"
4vbitb qv0s bubiibed in London ani attributed
F., 10 TIE ben Of Lf~. Fe0cnden, natiq,e Of Tire
State ofFermant. TIE toiIo4vimg ReTiczv Of
iris Poem, ex.raacd3y tie editor ot'tke BoPon
Palladium, from RE &C Geatleman'5 Maya
aiae," London, Jannary 1904, evW probably
I. .fi5niB Jons a,ngenen! to the readers Of tie
| ) Enquirer.
Terrible Tratoration Poetica Petition again Cal
| vaaizng Trumpery and the Perkni(tic lnfttuton;
in Four Cantos. Moi respectfully addrefed to the
Royal College Of Phyiciars, by Cbriaobber CanRe,
| NJ. d. l.. L. D. A. S. S. Fellow Of the Royal Col
ege of Physicians, dbsrdeen, and Honorary Member
of Nineteen very learned Societies. Second Edition
with great additions.
WE carcely know what tofay to this Mr. DR.. Caufie,
the a. S. S. sc. He appears to be fuch teiy fort
of an old gentleman, and Ito ule his own expreion)
news and hacks his opponents with fch terrible pro-
priety, that ihoud with to be ranked III that
number. We will therefore, merely rubmit to his
worlipful confederation, a few calm and candid re-
marks on his Poem, hoping that the redoubtabe Doc
tor viii not clais Us with thoe whom he files,
Ladies and Gentlemen REVIEWERS,
Who are fet of rnifchief-brewers -
Nor,
with autimenials make us fweat away,
Nor cram full of aGafrtida.'
In the first Canto entitled OURsELF, the author,
in an inmtabe strain of irony, rdicues thoe pretend
ed dicovereeand inventions OF certain Pieudo-philo
iophers, both of the natural andmoral clas whchhave
no tendenCyto meorate the condition OF though
we told by him. in his preface that many things
are introdsced merely for the Purpoie of laughing
7V.b, lt&aQtas, the inventors.
Tx fsscSying extracts are lpecimen of his man.
BY bare impeding, though months alter,
place where patient bad made water,
could divine, with Kill unfailing,
OF what diforder he ailing!" Up 2S)
g Although ST. Pierre knowing chap,
Delerves feather in his cap,
For having boldly fet his foot
The fooliih trah of Ifaac Newton;"
Contriv'd lcheme which very nice is,
For making tides of polar ices,
And fed old Oceans tub with fountains,
From arctic and antarctic mountains;
Though c1.i.l.9!c: tt.;ie:S } toid iIUw
To make clever fort Of plough,
Which would cen fet itief to work,
And plough an acre IN Jerk;
Though Prices projects are 70 clever,
They thew us how to live for ever;
Unlefs we blunder to our colt,
And break our heads againlt pot;
Though Darwin, thinking to difinay US,
Made dreadful Gathering in chaos,
And form'd with horrid quakes t'aiiist him.
His new exploded folar fystem
Thefe wights, when taken all together,
Are but the ihadow of feather,
Compard with Caustic, even as,
a puff OF heterogeneous gas" Up. 9, 40, &c)
The iecond Canto, entitled " CoNJURATIoNs,"
contains ludicrous defcrpton of protector Admins
galvanic operations on exaninate bodies. The poet
then conjures up ghost with exceeding good effect,
and exhibits other supernatural and terrific phenome
ia, which, while they, through far,
Make his heart to beat and thwack it,
And burst the buttons off his jacket"
Will produce not very difimilar operation on his
reader through laughter.
The third Canto, entitled manifesto" contains
many whimGcal arguments, ironically ALIGNED, to
prove that the metallic practice ought be dcoura-
ged. The really philolophic reader will not be diff
peafed with the following structures fome of the
dhorganizing tenets and whimica theories of DR..
Darwin. Among other reafons why
- ought hang the tractors
On gbbet high, like Indicators,
And with them that pestiferous corps
Who keep alive the patry poor ;"
the poet fays,
That, grant his tractors cure diieaGes,
Folks ought to die just when God peales,
And most of all the dirty poor,
Who make, quoth Darwin, good manure.
That, when the Ruflans, logger-headed,
Were killed by Frenchmen, ever dreaded,
Darwin rejoic'd, the filthy creatures
y, uuid iervs for sock TO make nuGquitoes.
That, iince )" to die is but to 1eep,"
And poor dIeasd icabby fheep,
That none need care Jingle button,
IF we Mould make them all dead mutton;
That death is but trivial thing;
Becaufe toad-stool or king
Will, after death be lurc to rife
In bats and bed-bugs, heas and flies"
Thefe fentinents Of Dr. Caullc are preciley thofc
Of DR.. Darwin, with this difference, that the latter
conveyed them in pohed heroes, bat the former in
witty IIudibrastics The particular alluGons, which
are chiefly from Darwin's "Temple Of Nature are
copoufy explained in the notes iuboined.
The last Canto, the CRANE ArrAcK," in which
the Doctor and the whole Royal College, in their bat
tie with the Perkinhes,
Makes as terrible racket
As ever did a wonan's clack yet ;"
aud in which every "death-doing' weapon that can
be found, either in urgcry medicine, welded with
atonibing adroitne5, we ihall attempt to defcrbc