The enquirer. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1804-1815, 1804-09-01
FOR THE ENQUIRER.
4 n e r III " 3 o H........No. III
ON POLrTENEsS.

The efforts of individuals to correct and re-
form iociety would be more efficient, If il were
not for the pertinacity with which mott of us az
fune the. executive right to examine own
faults. The propriety of erecting an ndepen-
dent tribunal to decide between perfons indiffe-
rent TO us, is never Gueitioned; but touch our
felves or OUR favOurites, and we inftantly be-
come hoodwinked errors the mott glarng are
readily covered by partiality while we adorn
with the utmoe fubtilty, all that is engaging and
meritorious.-There are however thofc, who
with becoming difdencs lend their minds TO
the tutelage of experience: to fuch addrefs
myfelf, lince they may be operated upon, altho'
in different degrees, by diicreet and temperate
reproof.
Every member of fociety has certainly deep
intereft in promoting that quality, which we I'M
deritand by the appropriate term, PoLiTENEss.
In the intercourfe which necefarily fubhfs be-
tween individuals in sddrs of commerce, poll
tics, arts and fcence, 70 much of our pleafure
depends upon the urbanity and good breeding
of our companions, that no hint fhould be diff
regarded, which may, in the remoteft degree
improve our manners orrefue our taftes.-Some
men have learnt to appreciate the advantages OF
eenteel department and fuavity of manners; and
confcious of the influence they have attained by
the refpe6 which fuch qualities command, only
6ec0us they are rare, have applied them to pu,-
poles OF feduction: they have thereby too often
itolen the affections of the people, and wound
ed their morals by examples of deception, which
however ipecious, are difowned and obtained
by the franknefs of genuine politenefs.-fn re-
publics therefore, it is enentially important,
that we !hould cultivate affabity and politenefs.
This would lead to an habitual elegance, and
an agreeable equality ofmannerJ: an equality rs
deGrable as that of intellect, and fcarcely lefs
important than that which our law of diftributi-
ons was defigped to promote.-An interchange
ofcivilites, and tender ofreciprocal aid among
neighbours, would win the heart of anv man,
that would take the trouble to contraff them
with fuch manners as are always the offspring
of rude and unpolifhed fate of fociety; where
brutal intoXication and the horrible dexterity of
pugilifm are in the van where the lofs of an
ear may disfigure us, or the lofs of our eyes de-
prive us of all that is beautiful. Bereft of the
moft DELIGHTFUL fenfe, the parent may hear the
voice fhis beloved infant, but the angelic finie
of innocene which touches the tendereft fibre i'm
his heart is forever clofed from his view.-Let
us then by correcting our manners, refrain by
degrees that ferocity and licentioufnefs, which
have Afforded the enemies of democracy fome
plaufibe grounds of cenfure.-
That we can ali attain the fame eminence in
the various grace which ornament A truly po-
lite man, is not TO be expected. Clowns and
Coxcomhs will fill up their circle, and few of
them aniwer very well to form a companion.
There are nevertheless certain leading points,
which every man of common fenfe NAV acquire t:
nameiv-patience in rgument-forbearanc to-
towards the ignorant-a prompt attention TO
thoie with whom we have TO tranEa6t bufnefs
the ftrefeit delicacY. and refpect towards fe-
maies-an unhounded attention to cleanliness:
and, avoid abfence that diqt;ifed inaitention
which claims the repetition of our names before
we can condefcead to lend an ear, is infIfera-
bic. Above all If YOU Win TO retain the fiI-
premacy of YOUR fpecies-ifiti IS not your deiire
to degenerate into the NOT difgufing and fwi-
NTH brutality, give yourfalf time to take your
meals pray do not emplov both hands in few
ne your mouth, nor labor till you peripire. Ne
yer be too bufilv employed in emptying your
own plate, TO af,if the company to the viands
that are near you.-The ceremonies ofthe table,
conftitute an important item in GOOD byeednp.
have frequently been difpufed with the habits
OF fome Of your offentatous difpenfers of feih,
vegetables, &c. They will nlif upon it that
yon eat nothing and altho' you earneftly con-
tend for the contrary, perlift in helping YOU to
anics little bit of their own choice. When we
analy2e This behavior, it ftands thus &c Sir, YOU
mutt feel fone ennbarralment, fnce you have
not been accuftomed to fuch company as that
OF which Won are now member prav difen-
gage yourfcle from the confution which Der
peXes You it deftrOys your appetite am
trulV tOrry TO lee YOU under tuch reftrant
chooie for yourfhlf; or, as know what is good
better than you do, will choofe for YOU I az
fure You that you are heartily welcome: conf
der yourfeIf at home.'-AlI this fluff is proba
bly uttered with 70 little grace and inceritv.
and merely becauic the upnart who repeats If
has heard fornething like it at thofc tables TO
which bis Dollars ba7,e Teen iuz,ited, that the
perfon to whom it is addreGed, if he has COM
mon fenfe, feels infulted and degraded bv his
Wifi, and too well aIured that be is not ut boy,e
1t is ridiculous TO tell a man how free he NAV
behave at your houie he can afcerfain this bv
your manners: but if Won want addrefs 70 rive
him complete idea Of your hofDitality, Won
had better let him gucfs at it than foolifhly at
temDt to ornament beyond its bearing, that
which he has the means of comprchendirc-
Every man can feel when he is welcome.
When the ceremonial of eating is over, the no
lefs fatiguing routine OF wine-drinking demands
its due refDett. Here moft frequently, a1tho'
brutal inebriation is avoided, enough is taken
into tl'e brain, =, produce
" A clah Of argument, and ar of words,
Wcrfe than the mortal hrunt Of rival f,yords."
When this b0bby point is reached, we are told
in Bacchanalian language, TO leave no beek-ta6t.
IN obedience to cufom, ard through reflect to
the benevolent gentleman who will not permit
you 70 depart either j6yroevfW or /obc, we take
OF hec'-taps, till we have f1me very ferrous adj
mnnitions that they are transferred to the brain.
This is a glorious boiaf gained: we are now pre-