The enquirer. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1804-1815, 1804-08-29

gv tor emitting the idit letter III his title tho
if you had deiired your readers next day 50 in
tead Of Dog to read Doge,' do confets that
it would have been no great reparaton.
i remember the lrih Parliament fome time
ago, were offended at fomething in the Public
Advertiier, and took up the matter 10 warmly,
that they ordered the paper to BIZ burnt. Now
MIR. Woodiail, whether you have taken umbrage
alto and liSeSvje, or whether it proceeds from
negligence, know not but certain it is, that
feveral unlucky miRakes have happened relative
to that Respectable body. AT their 6rit meeting
you told us Gnitead OF a bilD that motion
would be made for leave to bring in a bull =
and afterwards another motion, that the order
of the Dey be read, as fit was an Anembly on
the coat OF Barbary--you told us one day,
. that Lord 49,, of the kingdom of Ireland,
had been lately delivered OF daughter al d
we were anxious on my Lords account, till the
day following when you delivered his Lordihip
of the burthen, and brought the child into the
world more natural way.
In late fcuiile under the Piazza, Covent Garden
you informed US that an Iriih officer had got
confuiion III his head and YOU made no apology
afterwards, thinking, fuppoie, that there was
no location for any, as you were right to L.
| Not long ago you advertifed fpeedy cure for
raptures, and am afraid it gave fome wicked
batchelor location to fcoff at the holy fate of
| matrimony for as the Devil would have it Ct
mean one of your Devils) the very next advertife-
ment to it was from gentleman who wanted a
wife, and over it was printed matrirnony i'll CAPT.
| tails ; consequently 1t appeared that matrimony
was the mott ipeedy and efeetual cure for the
raptures, though of everio long Handing, &C. &c.
| / have known you acivertife inftead of a never
failing remedy, anever-failing remedy Now, Sir,
though this might be ftrittly true, yet hold it
not proper that it ihoud be TO fet down, as fup-
pofe the quack doctor paid you his money for
conveying very different lenfe to the
public. In receipt lately publiihed for the
cure of the plague -inftead of rue, you put rice.
and 70 made pudding of it; and in advertiiing
a courte of lectures, you turned a fyllabus into
| a fyllabub and called the perpetual motion ,
perpetual notion.
| with you would be little more cautious in
advertiGng faliyation not necefary for it han
pened, that by emitting the in falivatjon. Won
gave great offence to Tome very good chriftiane
| in my neighbourhood and alto gave occaGon
to fome wicked puniters to obferve, that if was
not the hrR time all eye had been loft in faIiva-
ton nay, that fome people had been 70 nm
| lukcv as to loofe couple.
| There is another advertisement which fire.
quently occurs, beginning with Whereas feve-
raj evil minded perfons," &c. One day you
made it evil minded Parfons, which was extreme
| ly unucky; for in theie times of inhdelty, peo-
pie are too apt to fcoff at the clergy, and indeed
at ali ferrous fubie6fs; as to myfelf mutt con-
feis that am particularly hurt at thole iInperti-
nent levities with which fome people indulge
themfelves, being perfon of ferrous turn of
mind, and of a dilpoGtion rather faturnne and
grave.
| 1t too often happens, Mr.. Woodfall, that
Z" what ihould be grave you turn to farce 20
remember in your paper, a feniible pathetic let
ter, figned Citizen he laments the internal
fate of this country, and you made it the infer
nal fate; when he exclaimed fad reverfe! you
make him cry out fad reverie; he difapproved
of all national reflections, you made him dfap-
prove of all rational reflections; and talking of
the fate of empires, you made him fay the fat
of empires; now as there are 70 many Handing
Jokes about citizens being fond of fat, whether
turtle fat, or vcnifon fat this unlucky miftake
quite poiled the letter, difobliged my friend the
Citizen, and =" all the fat was in the FREE And
here cannot help taking notice of paragraph
fome time iince, containing an account of the e.
lection of worthy Alderman for a certain ward,
when inftead of faying he was duly elected, you
fad he was duly elected, and thereby afforded
a handle for breaking fome commonplace iefts,
on that Respectable body of men, the Court of
| Aldermen. Another time in the account of an
entertainment given by worthy Alderman, to
the Deputy and Common Council of his ward,
where they dned on turtle, you faid they died
on turtle as if they had all ate till they choak-
ed or BURT I; whereas, on the contrary, It was
extremely remarkable, that none either over-ate
| themfeves, or caught furfeit that day.
From ieveral articles, Mr.. Woodfa, one
would be apt to conclude, that you were no
great geographer; for you to tell us of Corfairs
fitted out from Turin, intead of Tunis; and
that the Chinefe had revolted againft the Span-
ards, nnead of the Cbilefe now, though thefe
two nations are on different hdes of the globe,
fuppofe you thought they were near neighbours,
being within an ell of each other. Lat year,
when the Rulfian fleet took the lie of Lemnos,
you told US that part of the fquadron remained
at Candy, and the ref were going to attack the
lie of Lemons you fuppofed no doubt, that
Candy was fugar Hand, and that they were
going to the life of Lemons for fruit, and 70 be-
tween them to fuppiy the feet (pro bono pub
| lico) with punch.
You have fometimes treated the Ruflians We
ry njuriouly, by calling them Ruffians and
one day you told us the combined army of the
Turks and Tartars Gntead of Karn) were
commanded by Ram as if they had been a
parcel of fieep and when it was expected
the two armies were coming to action, you faid
they were coming to Acton aud as there was
a comfortable fall of ftocks about that time, /
| have reafou to think it was owing to the above
report, or fome other equally alarming.
trembled for you during the whole time Of
the cougref at Fockzany, tits ticllifh word in
the hands of a cdrelels competitor; and one
does not know what terrible work he might
| make of If ~ ie nof lon, Guce 49,,