Erotic humiliation

Erotic humiliation or sexual humiliation is the act of performing consensual psychological humiliation, in order to produce erotic excitement or sexual arousal. This can be for the person(s) being humiliated and demeaned, the person(s) humiliating them, or both. It is sometimes done before spectators, which includes performances of erotic humiliation in person, through pornography or webcam modeling. It may be part of BDSM and other sexual roleplay, and may be accompanied by the sexual stimulation of the genitals (or other erogenous zones) of one or both parties in the activity.
Humiliation is a highly subjective issue, and is dependent on context. Despite being carried out for erotic purposes, it is not necessary for erotic humiliation to be sexual in nature; as is the case with many other sexual activities, it is the feelings obtained from the experience that are desired, and that result in the arousal of those engaging in the practice, regardless of the nature of the actual activity. Humiliation is psychological. It most often involves or engenders feelings of submission for the recipient(s) of the humiliation, and dominance for the individual(s) administering it.
Erotic humiliation can be done verbally, physically, or both, and can be either private or public. Some individuals assume an active role (as a degrader) and others prefer to be spoken to in a degrading way (as a degradee). A common technique used to allow the submissive, also referred to as (but not to be conflated with) a bottom, to enter a state of mind of complete submission is to humiliate them while providing them with sexual stimulation. Some individuals who desire this form of humiliation also use it to acquire emotional release (as a form of catharsis). Humiliation can become ritualized, and unlike some sexual variations, it can also be carried out easily over long distances (for instance online).
While fantasy and fascination with erotic humiliation is a prevalent part of BDSM and other sexual roleplay practices, relatively little has been written on it. Humiliation play can, however, be taken to a point where it becomes emotionally or psychologically distressing to those involved, especially if it is public humiliation. Erotic humiliation can become extreme enough to be considered a form of edgeplay, which some consider may best be approached with advance negotiation and the use of a safeword.
The most common name for the individual being humiliated is the bottom, and the opposite individual who humiliates the bottom is often called the top. However, these terms are standard ones that are used in general dominant/submissive roleplay and are not specific to humiliation interests.
While elements of erotic humiliation may be part of a number of domination and submission-based activities, humiliation is not the same as submission. The recipient does not necessarily seek to be ordered about. Humiliation comes into its own as a sexual force when the recipient seeks the humiliation over and above means. For example, being spanked is primarily valued because of the belittlement involved. Humiliation therefore encompasses a range of paraphilia, including foot fetish, breast fetish, shoe fetish, body worship, spanking, cum shots, peotomy, bondage, and most BDSM styles. It can be as basic as the desire to kiss and massage feet as a precursor to sex; and it can be complex, involving roleplay and public displays of subservience. It can also be for a set period of time (a "scene") or an ongoing facet of a relationship. The humiliation is not intrinsic to the act or the object. Rather, it is semiotically charged by the shared attitude of the partners engaged in the act. They invest specific acts, objects, or body parts with a humiliating aspect.
Many scenarios may give rise to sexual humiliation. Some scenarios may be based on verbal abuse and others on physical aspects.
Some sexual humiliation involves physical inflicting pain, but much of it is far more concerned with ridicule, mocking, degradation, and embarrassment.
Sexual roleplaying can involve humiliation. For example, one person might play the part of a dog because they enjoy being mock-forced into it, and the top might emphasize the lowness of the bottom's status as an animal, whereas another person might play the role of the dog without any element of humiliation, simply as an expression of an inner animal or playful spirit.
Wet and Messy play can also involve humiliation.
Humiliation in general stimulates the same brain regions that are associated with physical pain, the inference being that humans evolved to remember social rewards and punishments as strongly as they recall physical reward or pain in response to their environment. As with any form of pain experimentation in a sexual context, consent and (paradoxically) a high degree of awareness and communication are needed to ensure that the result is desirable, rather than abusive. For example, a submissive may enjoy being insulted in some ways but would be genuinely crushed and devastated if humiliated or insulted in other ways.
Humiliation play is also connected to sexual fetishism, in that non-sexual activities may become sexualised by association with arousal, and also may be associated with exhibitionism in the sense of wanting others to witness (or being aroused by others witnessing) one's sexual degradation.
For some people, activities such as name-calling are a way of achieving ego reduction or getting over sexual inhibitions. For example, between gay people, terms usually associated with homophobia may be used, such as faggot and dyke.
As with all sexual activities, some people have sexual fantasies about humiliation, and others actually undertake it as a lifestyle or in a scene. Sexual fantasies relating to mild humiliation are common. Some humiliation roleplay (pup-play and age play in particular) is combined with loyalty and care-giving to the extent that these fetishes can be seen as exercises in trust rather than primarily a humiliation fetish. The desire to be beneath the other partner during intercourse, the idea of "getting caught" (as in having sex in the garden or woods), and simulated rape are emotional games that emphasise status, vulnerability, and control. However, for most people such ideas remain fantasies; the people would have strong reservations about the fantasies' being made public, or engaged in with a partner in real life, however erotic the idea may be. When someone reveals a fetish to a partner, this usually is a result of great trust. However, the desire to be humiliated may be a motivating cause for confession, in that the act of confessing can itself be humiliating. Many people worry about being ridiculed for their fetishes, and such ridicule from their partners could be psychologically catastrophic. Therefore, many people use online humiliation (in which the humiliator and others are involved via the Internet, using chat, e-mail, websites, etc.) as a compromise between exhibitionism and reality on the one hand, and safety and anonymity on the other.
Online humiliation occurs when an individual is seen in a sexually embarrassing context on the Internet. This practice allows the submissive to seek fetish partners from across the world. As the Internet has grown and continues to grow, so does online humiliation. Anecdotal reports indicate that the proportion of men being dominated by women on the Internet, through some type of personal service provided for a fee by the woman, vastly exceeds the instances of a woman being dominated online by a man, or another woman.
These practices can be conducted through chat, webcam, e-mail, BDSM contact websites, and proprietary virtual spaces such as Second Life or FetLife.
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