Theyre All Trying to Kill Me!: (Or How I Manage to Survive as a Flight Instructor)
by Jeremy D. I. VanderSluis
Category: Biography & Autobiography

The setting of the story takes place in the mysterious and magical city of New Orleans. An overwhelmed homicide detective hooks up with a rookie detective assigned to investigate minor thefts. The first case assigned to the rookie detective is a theft of two flowerpots from a cemetery. The rookie, apprehensive of his investigative knowledge, solicits help from the seasoned homicide detective. The case quickly evolves from a pair of plundered flowerpots to a million dollar operation involving several owners of the City's most exquisite and prominent antique shops. Together, the two become hopelessly lost in some of the city's most majestic burial grounds; known as the world famous "Cities of the Dead." During the investigation, the two detectives begin to notice several strange and unexplainable coincidences that seem to guide their every move. After some time, they manage to put aside their macho police attitudes; and learn to accept the fact that they were catapulted into the realm of the spiritual world--and the supernatural. The wacky and zany antics by the rookie and the straightforward nature of the homicide detective make for an unusual, but most effective, crime fighting partnership. And . . . just when the two detectives thought they had pushed the investigation to the limit, the case explodes, and leads them directly into a morbid, voodoo, serial murder plot of millennial proportions. Finally, the investigation reveals a suspect who is linked in the disappearance of the homicide detective's missing sister from when he was a child. In the end, the two detectives accept and understand the reasons for the spiritual interventions. As a result, hundreds of Lost Souls in the "Cities of the Dead" were freed from their torment, and the demons were finally revealed in a tremendous battle between the powers of good and evil. But, at what cost . . . Although the story is fictional, it is inspired from a true-life investigation involving the two detectives who authored this story. It is a spin off of certain events concerning the theft of stolen cemetery artifacts. We leave it totally up to the reader to decipher the fictional occurrences, and any similarities to persons or parties involved with the actual investigation are totally coincidental and unintentional.