Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters
Tags: comedy, fantasy, gothic, murder, paranormal, violence, flashback, good versus evil, psychedelic, humor, action, sci-fi

Plot synopsis:
Abandoned by their father deep in a forest, young Hansel and Gretel enter a gingerbread house and are captured by a cannibalistic witch. The witch forces Hansel to continuously eat candy to fatten him up, and enslaves Gretel by ordering her to prepare the oven. The siblings outsmart her and incinerate her in the fire of the oven. In the fifteen years that follow, Hansel and Gretel become famed witch hunters, slaying hundreds of witches. The pair find that they are somehow immune to spells and curses, but the incident in the gingerbread house has left Hansel diabetic. He needs a shot of insulin every few hours or he will get sick and die.
Becoming witch hunters as adults, Hansel and Gretel arrive in the town of Augsburg and immediately prevent Sheriff Berringer from executing a young woman named Mina for witchcraft. Mayor Englemann tells the crowd that he has hired the siblings to rescue several children presumed abducted by witches. Berringer hires trackers for the same mission in the hopes of disgracing the mayor and cementing his power. All but one of the sheriff's party are killed that night by the powerful grand witch Muriel, who sends one man back to the town tavern as a warning to the locals. Hansel and Gretel, along with the Mayor's deputy Jackson, capture one of Muriel's witches and interrogate her. They discover that the witches are preparing for the coming Blood Moon, where they plan to sacrifice twelve children in order to gain an immunity to fire. Muriel, accompanied by her witches and a troll named Edward, attack the town and abduct the final child. Muriel kills Jackson and launches Gretel out a window, rendering her unconscious. Gretel is rescued by Ben, a local teenager who is a fan of theirs and plans to be a witch hunter himself. Hansel grabs onto a fleeing witch by her broomstick, but falls and is lost in the forest.
The next morning, Mina finds Hansel hanging from a tree. She takes him to a nearby spring where she heals his wounds and makes love to him. Gretel searches for Hansel in the forest, but is attacked by Sheriff Berringer and his posse. The men capture and beat Gretel before being stopped by Edward who kills the sheriff and his men. Edward tends Gretel's wounds and tells her that he helped her because trolls serve witches. Hansel and Gretel reunite at an abandoned cabin which they discover is both a witch's lair and their childhood home. Muriel appears in front of them, telling them the truth of their past. She reveals that Hansel and Gretel's mother was a grand white witch named Adrianna who married a farmer. On the night of the last Blood Moon, Muriel planned to use the heart of the white witch to complete her potion. She found Adrianna too powerful and decided to use Gretel's heart instead. To get rid of Adrianna, Muriel revealed to the townspeople that Adrianna was a witch. The resulting angry mob burned her alive and hanged Hansel and Gretel's father. Following this revelation, the siblings battle Muriel before she stabs Hansel and abducts Gretel for the ceremony.
Hansel wakes up with Mina, who reveals herself to be a white witch. She heals his wounds again and uses a grimoire to bless Hansel's arsenal of weapons. Hansel, Mina, and Ben head out to disrupt the Blood Moon Sabbath. Mina begins slaughtering dark witches with a Gatling gun, while Hansel squares off against Muriel's witches and frees the children. Edward defies Muriel's orders and releases Gretel before Muriel throws him off the cliff. Muriel flees on a broomstick, but Ben manages to shoot her and forces her to crash. Hansel goes after Muriel while Gretel stops to revive Edward. Hansel, Ben, and Mina follow Muriel's trail to the original gingerbread house. Muriel wounds Ben and kills Mina before Hansel shoots her several times, knocking her into the house. Gretel arrives and the pair engage Muriel in a brutal fight that ends with Gretel decapitating her with a shovel. They burn Muriel's body on a pyre and collect their reward for rescuing the children. They head out on their next witch hunt accompanied by Ben and Edward.
During the credits, Hansel and Gretel are able to slay a Desert Witch.

Review: I seriously enjoyed this film-- it had more gore than Mel Gibson could shake a fist at, some very cute actors, and didn't waste time with excessive back-story and details, and gave me many good laughs.Its not an intellectually stimulating movie...
In my opinion this is the type of movie to see if: 1)You love and support Jeremy Renner 2)You're in a mood to see cool but not overly flashy effects 3)Love for dark fairy tales 4)Awesome make up and costumes (the witches were very VERY well put together) 5)Just an all around chill movie with gore violence and cool effectsDon't see it if: 1)you expect high quality acting 2)Over the top graphics and effects 3)Complex plot line 4)Extremely witty scriptBecause Jeremy Renner was in big time movies, people are over analyzing this one.
There's lots of gore here, so people who love endless CGI blood will fall in love with this film.Tommy Wirkola's film adds some more depth to the classic tale from the Grimm Brothers, Hansel and Gretel.
And so Wirkola fast- forwards the story many years later, where he would like us to believe that Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretel (Gemma Arterton) have found their calling as witch hunters, travelling around from village to village killing the evil ones who kidnap children and rescuing their abductees in the process.One particular such mission brings them to the town of Augsburg, where a beautiful blonde-haired woman named Mina (Pihla Viitala) is due to be drowned in front of an angry crowd by the shifty Sheriff Berringer (Peter Stormare).
Seeing no visible signs of sorcery on her, Hansel and Gretel free her, inadvertently setting themselves on a collision course with the Sheriff.But the bitter Sheriff and his band of hunters are the least of their problems – indeed, their most pressing concern is the Grandmother Witch Muriel (Famke Janssen) and her hench-women, who have been keeping the children they have kidnapped locked up in wait for a much more sinister plot to make them even more powerful.
But Wirkola also brings his eye for gore – seen in his sophomore film 'Dead Snow' – to this movie, so be prepared for exploding flesh, crushed skulls and some particularly nasty decapitations that is good reason why this grown-up version of Hansel and Gretel does not carry a kid-friendly rating.Amidst the gore and adult humour, Renner and Arterton unfortunately are left with paper-thin characters.
While Renner pretty much looks dour throughout the movie, Arterton seems determined to have fun with her ass-kicking female heroine of a role, and her portrayal of Gretel resembles a Lara Croft for the medieval ages.
Other supporting actors don't make much of an impression – including Thomas Mann, a firm Hansel and Gretel devotee who gets some laughs from his fanboy behaviour and eventually sees his wish come true to be a witch hunter like his heroes.And we suspect, how much you will end up enjoying this new twist to the classic fairy tale will also depend on your expectations.
The siblings Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretel (Gemma Arterton) are left alone in the woods by their father and captured by a dark witch in a candy house.
On the other hand, it has a good visual style, its action is very pleasing, if a bit gore-filled (not a bad thing in this case), the two main actors are actually pretty good in their roles, and as a whole it's just plain solid fun.
I couldn't believe my eyes when I first saw the poster for "Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters" because it actually puts together my two favorite current movie stars, Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton!
This film seems to be a cross of those two types, and so is one film I made sure I would watch this once it opened.Hansel and Gretel starts as we all know them from the fairy tale, children left by their parents in the woods.
When a mysterious series of missing children terrorizes a small town, its mayor hires Hansel and Gretel to look for the witches responsible and kill them.That was one shallow story line I know, but I really enjoyed myself while watching this movie.
But Hansel and Gretel as witch hunters followed the mold of Blade, and proved to be quite the mass market entertainer, with no pretences in wanting to be more.Written and directed by Norwegian Tommy Wirkola, this story had all the right ingredients for the kind of film it wanted to be, taking the familiar folk lore, and putting a creative, not necessarily new, spin on it.
This forms the prologue, and the What If scenario that Hansel and Gretel were to build on their initial success, and form a career out of hunting, and destroying witches anywhere, bounty hunter style.As you would already have seen in the trailer, this is but one of their adventures shown in helping a village deal with the menace of the witch Muriel (Famke Janssen), who together with her posse of like-minded witches have kidnapped children in preparation of a ritual to be performed under the blood moon.
And there's no other better for the job than for Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretel (Gemma Arterton), engaged by the mayor thanks to the widespread news of their successful witch hunting exploits played over the opening credits.
And having another Bond girl in Famke Janssen in yet another villainous role also helped, although every character in this film is pretty one dimensional.But this is an action-adventure taking a well known fairy tale and giving it a license to thrill with blood and gore.
With the short runtime of 1 hour and 28 minutes, you can expect this to move briskly and to be packed with a lot of action.The story: The movie starts with the young Hansel and Gretel losing their parents.
Sure, there is a great potential that the movie never reach but Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters won't disappoint if you want a good entertainment packed with action.
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013) ** (out of 4)R-rated, gory horror-adventure has brother and sisters Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretal (Gemma Arterton) called to a small town to try and locate some children that have been kidnapped by some witches.
HANSEL & GRETEL: WITCH HUNTERS isn't quite as bad as some are making it out to be but there's no question that the entire film just has an uneasy mix of genres that never fully come together and in the end the film just came off as something that didn't know what it wanted to be or do.
Now, everyone pretty much knew the story of two kids who escape the wrath of a cannibal witch living in a candy house in the middle of the woods, but what happens after that is revealed in this movie: Hansel and Gretel become witch hunters.
Throw in a little humor, a couple of nice twists, and excellent special effects (from the CG to the monstrous design of the witches) and you have one fun fairy tale roller coaster ride.Definitely one of the better reinterpretations of classic fairy tales out there that I have seen and worth a watch, so check it out!
Also, it's been said that to properly make a parody of something you need to truly love it, but here, such scenes feel quite crass.I'm aware that this movie is not supposed to be a high-brow work of art, it's supposed to be a slice of enjoyable fantasy adventure, and don't get me wrong, I love a good fantasy romp as much as the next man (I even have a soft spot for 2004's 'Van Helsing') and often relish a nice dollop of violent (and somewhat silly) action, having thoroughly enjoyed Zack Snyder's adaptation of '300'.
The film centers on the classic story of Hansel and Gretel and picks up after that tale as they are now a brother and sister team of bad ass witch hunters.
Just Plain Bad. If someone ever figures out the point of this film, don't bother telling me.In 1812 Germany Hansel and Gretel run around hunting witches with everything from modern revolvers, pump shotguns, belt fed machines guns, and tasers.
The acting is shallow (I suspect the actors weren't convinced themself of the scenario), the medieval contemporary / atmosphere is a mess ( "Van Helsing" replica but much worse ), and god all I can remember really about the movie is that tons of of ketchup and strawberry jam spammed at every single minute of the movie, looking to put any sense in this glorious mess "Hansel and Gretel" - Witch Hunter...I struggled to not leave during the movie, having some hope for a potential sparkling in the scenario, which will save the day...
This is not a detractor, as the music, no matter how much it shows its influence, is very good.I would like to see Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton team up in another, better movie with a better sense of adventure.
"Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" is a pretty dopey movie, and the 3D just makes it dopier..
For a tough, burly witch hunter guy who didn't take prisoners, Jeremy Renner's Hansel has a poorly explained and even more careless paid off medical condition that requires a completely unexplained yet miraculous cure- -the situation and stakes of which he outright explains the to a woman who was inexplicably two thousand times more attractive than her fellow town folks, who later, after Gretel proclaims his inability to swim, finds it incredibly appropriate to take off her clothes and lead him into a neck-high pond.
basically, it was unwatchable; 45 minutes into it I gave up; admittedly, I could tell after the first 10 minutes (i.e. after the prologue retelling of the original fairy tale) that I wasn't the target demographic or audience but that's no excuse (IMO) for the awful spectacle of ugly old women being gruesomely murdered by a handsome man & largely skin-tight leather-clad (which showcases her generally straddling - and ample - thighs) young woman clearly enjoying their 'job'; it felt to me like watching mediaeval Bonny & Clyde type psychos with serious granny issuesnor was there any excuse for such a poor plot-line and almost complete absence of wit in the script.
What it actually is is a veritable goldmine of rip-roaring popcorn entertainment, so outrageous in execution yet so disciplined in pacing that it becomes increasingly easier to immerse oneself with each passing second.The film opens with a minimalist retelling of the classic fairytale, as a young Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretel (Gemma Arterton) outsmart their first witch, burning her alive and escaping her candied fortress with limbs and brain intact.
Packed with creative and beautifully choreographed action and with some gleaming profanity scattered in for good measure, Hansel and Gretel is a welcome stray from the labours of 'historically accurate' storytelling, as the sheer audacity of the project permits- if not, encourages- the audience to quickly ignore the siblings' modern American accents and mounds of firepower at a time where light bulbs remain closer to witchery than reality.Excessive amounts of blood and gore punctuate every action sequence, giving the film Tarantino-esque levels of violence, while it takes itself about as seriously as any QT film in the process.
I thought that Jeremy Renner was great in this film, and Gemma Arterton made a fantastic Gretel.
In fact, Hansel & Gretel has exactly the vibe that I expected from Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and Van Helsing (and which those movies failed to deliver).
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters — Action and magic in the medieval times.
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters is an action hero movie set in the dark ages.
A few good twists and surprises are in store throughout but it knows it doesn't take itself too seriously.The acting from Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton are great as always, they get a fair amount of screen time together they can show they're action chops and reel in their character into reality.
I could go on, but if you've seen it you know what I mean.Jeremy Renner is a good actor and it's readily apparent that they signed him to what should be a B movie so that he could hopefully garner the producers some respectable box office returns or at least help to break even on the film.
Perhaps that impression came from such movies such as "Twilight" and "Red Riding Hood".But "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" turned out to be somewhat of a bloody and gory action / horror movie.
The whole village really looked real and seemed like something right out of the middle ages.Well, "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" isn't all just great stuff, there were parts which I didn't really fathom or could fully wrap my head around.
But it was without a doubt Famke Janssen (playing Muriel) who stole the show and totally carried the movie."Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" is an action-packed and adrenaline-filled action / horror movie, and it was a real treat to watch, both story-wise and effects-wise.And on a final note, then this movie confirmed my suspicion, Edward is a troll!.
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters: Even before watching it, common sense already told me that this will be an outstanding film!.
Actually it's much better than I expected it to be!Jeremy Renner (Hansel) and Gemma Arterton (Gretel) acted spot-on in playing their roles.
The guys get some nice shots of Gemma's Cleavage (they knew what they were doing)Famke Jansen is another beauty who plays the main Evil Witch with some style & gutso.And then we come to one of the most beautiful new actresses I've seen in awhile 'PIHLA VIITALA' make a note of this INCREDIBLY BEAUTIFUL Finish actress for she is truly AMAZING and features in a lovely revealing scene here that the guys are just gonna love.So yes it's an over-the-top foul mouthed, brutal, gory fairy-tale but there's plenty of fun & action to be found here...I especially liked the ending with the gathering of all the witches at the 'Blood Moon' & it features a truly awesome looking Troll who goes by the name of Edward.It's a FUN Great Looking Popcorn Film...PERFECT for 'Halloween Night' after the kids have gone to bed (and after they have watched the likes of the wonderful "Hocus Pocus" or "The Monster Squad") I for one am looking forward to these characters teaming up in the proposed sequel (as you get to see them as a group heading towards their next quest) so it should hopefully be fun to see what they come up with next.This is a whole lot of late-night fun that will probably do good business in future Halloween Nights....ENJOY.A Rocketeer Flyer Rating of an up up away 8/10.
To be honest I never wanted to watch this movie for the fact it took a children story and made it a R-Rated film about our protagonists become witch hunters.There are a few things I will say I like about the film.
I would advice watch with caution because the gore and violence in this movie take it to the limit often times I had to turn away because I have my limits when it comes to thatMy advice only watch it if you're curious some might like it some will think one watch that's it.I give Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunter an 6 out of 10.
Hansel and Gretel (Jeremy Renner and Gemma Atherton) are bounty hunters who track and kill witches all over the world.
Casey's Movie Mania: HANSEL AND GRETEL: WITCH HUNTERS (2013).
The good news is, Wirkola's US debut in HANSEL AND GRETEL: WITCH HUNTERS is a hard-hitting, R-rated gorefest -- with plenty of hardcore violence, dark humor, goofy undertone and playful energy in a compact 88 minutes.
Well, as in this classic fairy tale, you should know how the story ends except that this movie offers a new twist: These two siblings manage to defeat and burn the witch where they are being held captive inside the Gingerbread House.
Renner (Hansel) and Arterton (Gretel) are likable characters with a little depth and that's pretty much all you need from this type of film.
"Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters" is yet another failed attempt to convert a child's tale into an adult-oriented action movie.
Hansel and Gretel are now adults and are professional witch hunters.The original fairy tale is pretty dark as it is, child abandonment, kidnapping, attempted cannibalism, people being burned alive, this film tries to make it darker simply by splashing blood all over the place and that's about it.
Overall, 'Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters' is mildly entertaining but it is pretty forgettable.
Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters is a campy twist to the children's fairy tale.
Hansel&Gretel: witch hunters takes on a modern twist to the Grimm Brothers story.
(Which ended up producing quite a fun, quirky little action film, but I digress)So I wasn't too surprised to learn that Hollywood was planning on unleashing a new take on the classic fable of "Hansel & Gretel", this time telling the story of how after escaping the witch who tried to kill them, the siblings went on a lifelong conquest to hunt other witches for profit.
Yes, it's time to take a look at "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters", a goofy, loud and very stupid action movie that is loaded floor-to-ceiling with rampant entertainment value, thankfully because it never takes itself too seriously.We begin with a brief re-telling of the classic, with some alterations.
The current addition to this "killing mythological characters" craze comes in the form of Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters.I wanted to see this because Jeremy Renner, who plays Hansel, is a great actor, and I thought it was a cool idea to have a "where are they now" of fairy tale characters.