Double Agent 73
Tags: cult, grindhouse film

Plot synopsis:
Chesty Morgan, a woman whose bust is 73 inches in size, plays Jane Tennay, a large breasted secret agent. Her agency wants her to assassinate, one by one, an organized crew of low grade heroin pushers. In order for her to prove her killings, they plant a tiny camera in her big left breast. Each time she needs a photo taken, she takes off her shirt and clicks over her left breast.
Unlike the previous film, there's no smothering and only one death sequence involves her monstrous breasts. In it, she ambushes and ties up a guy's girlfriend in their bathroom. She then rubs poison over her own breasts and climbs into the guy's bed. Even though the light is on and disregarding the huge difference in breasts' size, the sleepy guy thinks it's his girlfriend. He starts kissing her large breasts and soon after dies from the poison.
It turns out the agency planted a time triggered bomb inside the camera, as an insurance policy in case she is captured. Just in the nick of time Jane has all the photos she needed and is rushed to the hospital. The camera is removed and the photos reveal Jane's love interest is the head criminal. When they meet up, he confesses and asks her to marry him. Jane responds by shooting him to death and proceeding to her next mission.

Review: "Double Agent 73" is an amateurish and inept movie, yet there is an honesty about its amateurishness and ineptness: you get the feeling that the people involved didn't want to cheat you, they really did try to make an espionage / action movie, they just lacked the talent and budget required.
Sure, you could complain all day long about the pointlessly long shots of, say, horse-racing, or the sped-up "car chase", or the lack of logic in the story, but you also have to give credit to the film's creativity: it's not every day you can see a punch with the breast replacing the fist, or death via ice cubes stuffed into the victim's mouth!
Chesty Morgan gives a somewhat catatonic performance (she's no worse than anyone else in the cast, mind you), and there can be little argument that her breasts are unerotic (bigger is not always better), however she does have a pretty face and nice legs.
This is the "Queen of Exploitation", Doris Wishman's hilariously inept follow-up to her previous collaboration with the obscenely endowed Chesty Morgan ("Deadly Weapons").
Here Chesty plays super agent Jane Tenay who is tailing a string of heroin pushers.
Chock full of the typical Doris Wishman "trademarks" (close-ups of inanimate objects such as an ashtray, feet, or usually Chesty's massive cleavage) this flick was sampled in the John Waters comedy classic "Serial Mom"...it must be seen to be believed!.
I want to give it a low score for being one of the worst films I've seen in ages.
If you don't get why people find bad movies good, maybe this isn't for you.
While I think Chesty's unfeasibly large breasts were somehow supposed to be titillating (excuse the pun), they're actually rather unfortunate.
As the plot revolves entirely around her hauling them out at every opportunity, it's a bit like watching a car wreck.
This film carries on the tradition of sleazy exploitation captured so nicely in Doris Wishman's and Chesty Morgan's first collaboration, Deadly Weapons.
This time around Chesty has to remove her blouse and bra to take secret pictures with the camera that has been implanted in one of her breasts.
The big difference in this film, however, is that Wishman has some fairly brutal killings and shows a good bit of gore.
A movie about a butt ugly woman with a 73 inch bust with a camera implanted in her left boobie is definitely Oscar-worthy material.
Just looking at Ms. Chesty makes my back hurt.Rating a negative 57 out of 1000.
Double Agent 73 is the second film exploitation auteur Doris Wishman made with Chesty Morgan, she of the 73-inch bust.
The fact that both movies were released in the same year is an early indication that Wishman didn't necessarily waste a lot of time making them and knocked both out very quickly.
Consequently, both these films never remotely betray their low budget origins and are truthfully very amateurish throughout, with the camera-work in particular being of an especially terrible standard.
So there's not a massive amount between both films I suppose but I would definitely opt for Deadly Weapons as being the better of the two, I think it has a better overall focus plus the idea of huge breasts being used as deadly weaponry was a more inspired idea than having them being receptacles for a hidden camera.I guess you would have to describe this as a sexploitation spy film.
It's about a secret agent played by Chesty who hunts down a gang of heroin traffickers.
A secret camera is installed in one of her mammoth breasts in order to allow her to gather espionage evidence, unfortunately, if she does not complete her mission within a week the camera will self-destruct, killing her in the process.
This story-line is more or less a framework to allow for a lot of scenes of Chesty exposing her huge hooters.
Agent 99 gets a bit too close to the truth, but manages to gasp out a clue as to the identity of Toplar: he has a scar.This film was made back to back with "Deadly Weapons", so it must be compared to that film.
Has Chesty Morgan done better here?
While still a bad movie and full of cheese, this is probably a slight improvement on "Weapons"...
In a comment I wrote about Doris Wishman's 'Nude On The Moon' recently I described it as one of those cult "classics" that you only really watch just so you can say you've seen it.
Well this is even more the case with 'Double Agent 73', a movie which is literally a chore to sit through.
Wishman's freakish discovery Chesty Morgan plays super spy Jane Genet (hyuk, hyuk) a.k.a. Agent 73, cos she's got a 73 inch bust, see?
She's given an address book with some leads but as no one knows what Toplar looks like she's told to photograph all the bad guys she kills, and they'll sort it out later.
She does this via a camera surgically implanted in her left breast.
If you're a big time fan of Seventies sleaze you might enjoy 'Double Agent 73' a lot more than I did, but my response was a yawn and please pass me the Russ Meyer..
If you're a big time fan of Seventies sleaze you might enjoy 'Double Agent 73' a lot more than I did, but my response was a yawn and please pass me the Russ Meyer..
Chesty Morgan will always hold a place in my heart, despite the fact that she can't act for crap and has the grossest set of breasts I've ever seen.
I loved "Deadly Weapons" for all the wrong reasons and the "sequel" of sorts, "Double Agent 73" fares with me the same way.Chesty plays a spy named Jane (?) who must rub out a villain and his henchmen.
Chesty is in fine form, an even worse actress than before and her breasts have attained more scars, scales, and veins!
"Double Agent 73" is a lot of fun to watch, but it does hit boring spots.
More things to watch for: Chesty gets more dialogue when she's turned away from the camera than when she's facing it; Chesty's supposedly painful expression when she rips a bandage off her breast; more of Chesty looking at director Doris Wishman and into the camera; great scenes of Chesty snapping pictures of spies with a camera in her left breast (!); and the hilarious notion that the head of a spy syndicate would go out of his way to get Chesty, his "master spy", on a case!
Chesty gets caught in a web of intrigue and spy-jinks that require her to put her giant assets to work fighting crime.
I don't really like porn films or "nudie-cuties", but I do like BAD films, and this really, really tops the lot - and that's saying something because I have seen a lot of trash in my life, but nothing has ever dropped as low as Doris Wishman's "Double Agent 73"Chesty Morgan...what can I say?
The whole film is a vehicle for Chesty, but sadly she can't act.
In fact she seems incapable of walking in a straight line, sitting down, getting up, taking a shower or even opening a door without looking confused and/or apparently forgetting how to do it.
This is actually a sequel to the first Wishman/Morgan epic, "Deadly Weapons", but the story and characters are not related, and this one is actually the sillier of the two because the plot here tries to set Chesty Morgan up as a special government agent, and with her lack of acting skills, the result is far more hilarious than the mousy character she played in the first film.I won't (can't!) detail the plot, but basically, Chesty "plays" Jane Genet, a super-spy given the mission of tracking down members of a criminal gang.
You'll be agape with horror at the many, many pointless shots of Chesty with her massive cleavage on display, or topless and with the full extent of her naked bust filling the screen over and over again.
It only adds to the spectacle that Chesty isn't really that attractive (she's no spring chicken, but rather flabby around the tum and sporting a ludicrous "blonde-bombshell" wig), plus she's kitted out in the most hellish, frilly, spotty 1970's fashions ever seen, along with the giant clunky platform shoes that she can't seem to do without in every single scene.
If you can stand to watch as the film hobbles though one disasterously staged scene after another, you'll be treated to Chesty killing a guy by rubbing her poisoned boobs in his face, flinging a deadly earring at another, blowing a lock by jabbing a lit match into a blob of colourful modelling clay, and much much more.
But this isn't just bad film-making, this is way below what even an enthusiastic amatuer could produce.
On a practical note, Wishman's total lack of talent makes the already wafer thin plot sink into incomprehensibility on several occasions, underneath the weight of so many cut corners and messed up shots.
Doris Wishman can't shoot synch-sound, so she keeps her actor's faces off-screen as much as she can whenever a conversation is taking place.
This results in most of the film's dialogue being played over endless shots of feet and shoes, hands holding telephones, backs of heads, walls, lamps, and close-up cleavage.2.
And when Chesty can't act, the onscreen result is pure madness.
Chesty can be clearly be seen looking for her cues, apparently being told what to do as she goes along.
There were seemingly no rehearsals, as the actors continually move out of frame, resulting in the camera wobbling wildly to keep them in the frame.Put all that together and this is a film of staggering poorness.
This would probably be a camp classic if poor Chesty Morgan seemed to be having fun making the film, but she doesn't.
I hope she made some money out of this sorry experience, and I'd also like to thank her for her contribution to what have to be THE worst (and therefore among the funniest ) cult movies ever seen!.
Please don't pay too much attention too the extremely low 1/10 rating, as "Double Agent 73" is nevertheless recommended in a very culty kind of way, but I simply can't bring myself to donate a positive number to such an utter piece of amateurish trash!
This isn't really a movie; this is a weird homage to two enormous and hideous bags of fat that are supposed to look like breasts.
I can't possibly imagine that there are men (or women?) out there that get aroused by gigantic cup sizes like this, but this film as well as its predecessor "Deadly Weapons" was a modest cult-hit in the bizarre sexploitation-circuit of the early 1970's.
Chesty Morgan is the worst excuse for an actress ever, but her breasts are like smörgåsbords for weirdies and she doesn't mind walking around with them exposed.
With a hi-tech camera implanted in her boobs (!), Chesty sleazes her way through the horny bad guys.
Whatever is said or done, the camera ALWAYS zooms in on Chesty's chest (although the nipples are located somewhere in her waist-area)!
It feels like director Doris Wishman, or any of the producers involved, don't even want you to care about the plot.
Not only Chesty's acting is embarrassing, but also the rough editing, the dialogs and the handful of gory killings.
I suppose this counts as one of those movies you have to see in order to believe, but if you don't have a particular weakness for low-grade cult, I'd say skip it..
Doris Wishman followed up the immensely successful Deadly Weapons with this all-you-can-eat lunatic buffet.
Burlesque grotesque Chesty Morgan, the girl who makes Candy Samples look like an ironing board!
As Jane Genet, Agent 73, Chesty has her vacation at the nudist camp (!)--dig the hilarious cuts between literary-minded Chesty and a puppy--interrupted by this little assignment.
So she puts on her red-and-black rhinestone-studded platforms and hits the streets, eliminating the bad guys and taking photos with a tiny spy camera (complete with flash) implanted in her humongous left breast.
The deaths are violent, and the victim's last sights are shaky, blurred shots of Chesty's mountainous mammaries.
What a way to go.This violent, uproariously crazed excuse for Chesty to unsnap her bra and maul those monsters (FLASH-CLICK!) is like Deadly Weapons ratcheted to new heights of inanity (if such a thing could be possible).
Chesty's dubbed voice has a slightly harder edge this time around, but her acting has, thankfully, not improved.
Her face is expressionless for ninety percent of the running time; occasionally she smiles, as if being ordered to at gunpoint, and Band-Aid removal brings a grimace of vague bewilderment that must be seen to be disbelieved.
Though the dialogue is mostly in sync, Doris Wishman still indulges in her trademark cut-aways and obsessive close-ups of feet (giving us great views of the star's endless arsenal of platforms and spike heels).
And of course, the car chase, where Chesty and her pursuer drive the legal limit as the film is sped up.A third Chesty epic was planned but never made, since Wishman found the star unbearably difficult to work with.
Even more unfortunate is the fact that, after working with Fellini, the Polish sight gag--I mean, STAR--never made another film, and has since completely disappeared (how could she hide?).
If only John Waters had been a consultant!!!This film follows the story of an undercover detective named Jane, played (lethargically, as if she were a robot in the EPCOT hall of presidents) by Chesty Morgan.
A camera is implanted in her left breast, necessitating that she remove her bra to use it.
(again, and again, and again)  The camera has a self destruct device to ensure that the evidence gathered will not fall into the wrong hands.With all of the talent and expressiveness of a quaalude junky and the fashion sense of Maude Finley, Chesty sets off and lands in one run-in after another with thugs, creeps, and low-lifes with only her wit and savvy to protect her.
Well, I'll start with star Chesty Morgan.
Although she was in her 30s when she appeared in this movie, her face looks about 15 years older than her actual age.
They look grotesque and unnatural.The way that the movie was filmed just makes the experience even worse.
It was obviously shot silently, and director Doris Wishman tries in vain to hide this by long periods of time with no talking.
And when people do talk, most of the time it's shot in a way where you don't see the speaker's face and moving lips.
Wishman also brings in next to no production values to the movie, resulting in such things as a hospital sequence shot in someone's house.
But the biggest sin Wishman makes is that the movie is so boring.
Double Agent 73 (1974) * (out of 4) I guess the only thing you really need to know about star Chesty Morgan is that her measurements are 73FF-32-36.
If you must know about the plot to this sexploitation pic then Chesty plays an undercover agent who is trying to clean out some mean heroin dealers.
The plot twist here is that Chesty has a camera inserted into her boob so that she can squeeze them and take a picture of the people she's killing.
If you're looking for any type of quality then you've obviously never seen a film from exploitation master Wishman as anything good really isn't her cup of tea.
There's no question that this is a horrid movie but it's somewhat like a car wreck because no matter how brutal or ugly it gets you still can't turn your head away.
As for Chesty I guess it goes without saying that she's a horrible actress.
For the life of me it seems like she's incredibly unhappy or confused about being in this movie as she looks as if she's in pain or perhaps drugged.
The low-budget nature of the film actually helps it as everything from the music score to the editing to the direction is pretty bad.
This is pure exploitation so I'm sure people will enjoy sitting around with their friends and making fun of everything that's going on..
MASTER PLAN: run a heroin ring, avoid the breasts.
There's a special agent out there, this film tells us, who has mammoth breasts and can kill criminals rather effortlessly.
Her boss has a camera implanted in her...left breast, so she can take photos of her targets, usually after they're dead.
The filmmakers are more intent on letting the movie camera linger on those huge breasts, whether the character is speaking on the phone or whatever.
The director also likes to concentrate shots on arbitrary objects in the scene, or a little dog on the grass, for no reason.
This could be instructional for film students on how not to shoot and edit a film.This is, of course, a continuing attempt to capitalize on the James Bond-type spy thriller, going all the way back to such female Bonds as "Modesty Blaise" and the similarly no-budget "Girl From S.I.N." Agent 73, as played by Chesty Morgan, does assassinate various characters, but she acts out the killings in such a lifeless manner, beyond just being casual, you get not so much as a chill as just a sense that the actress can't act worth a damn.
She previously used her breasts in "Deadly Weapons," actually smothering people to death; here, it's more standard, like garroting someone with a cord, though there's one scene involving ice cubes which is different, if still dull.
Also, to get any enjoyment out of this movie, you have to be the type that really appreciates overweight women who keep swinging grotesquely pendulous breasts in your face, ad nauseum.