Way of the Vampire

Plot synopsis:
1885 Transylvania(?): Abraham Van Helsing [Rhett Giles] eaves his wife in the
care of Monk Sebastien [Andreas Beckett] while he and his slayers penetrate the lair of Count
Vladimir Dracula. Although Van Helsing successfully destroys Dracula, the cost
is great. The monk Sebastien is actually a vampire prince, and while Van
Helsing is out killing vampires, Sebastien turns Van Helsing's wife into one.Present day Los Angeles: Dr Abraham Van Helsing, slayer of vampires, is
laying low, working as a hematologist at University Hospital after just moving
there from Paris. Vampires have been lying low, too, drinking the cold blood of
dead animals, not hunting humans, basically starving themselves all on account
of their fear of Van Helsing. Roman [Jared Cohn] can't take it anymore. He gets
a job at University Hospital as an
orderly and steals three pints of blood from the blood bank. When Arianna [Denise Boutte],
chief vampire bitch, sees the name on the label -- Dr Abraham Van Helsing --
she begins to shiver in her black, high-heeled, lace-up boots and runs straight
to Sebastien (after taking a few swigs of the blood herself). She offers the
blood to Sebastien, who has disintegrated into a withered, sniffling, lustless
ragtag lying on a couch and talking in word salad. Arianna forces a sip of the
human blood down his throat and, after that one sip, Sebastien knows what he
must do -- unite all the vampires, feed again on humans, show them who's boss,
and kill Van Helsing. However, killing Van Helsing isn't going to be easy. After being forced
to destroy his own wife, Van Helsing turned to the Knights Templar and made a
deal with God. Until he kills the last vampire prince, Van Helsing will walk
the earth as an immortal. The only stipulation is that, should he ever drink
vampire blood, he will be turned and forever damned.The first thing Sebastien does, now that he's found purpose again, is to
drink the blood of a prostitute, banging his chest after the first few swigs
and roaring like King Kong. The next thing he does is change into black leather
pants and a new goth shirt and hold a pep rally, inspiring the vampires to come
out from the derelict, stinking, moldering buildings in which they are hiding
and rise again as hunters of human blood. As luck would have it, the prostitute
shows up at University Hospital, practically drained of blood. She is given
eight units of blood, but she's not getting any better. When nurse Emily [Brent Falco] tells
Van Helsing about the patient, he runs to her room to take a look. Right away,
Van Helsing knows that she is changing into a vampire. When no one is looking,
Van Helsing sprinkles her with holy water, smothers her with a pillow, drives a
stake through her chest, and cuts out her heart with a cast saw.Van Helsing concludes that the vampires are hunting humans again and that
it is time for him to come out of hiding and put together a team of slayers.
So, Van Helsing consults Father Cefalu [Anthony Turk], who agrees to find some young,
able-bodied, seminary students for him to train. The next morning, Van Helsing
meets seven recruits and gives them a pep talk on the art of vampire slaying.
As Van Helsing educates the recruits in the way of the vampire, nurse Emily
shows up. She explains that she works with the homeless at the parish and that
Father Cefalu asked her to come.
Suddenly a call comes in. The detective brother of one of the recruits calls to tell him about a body that was just found. It was drained of
blood and its heart was cut out. Van Helsing, Dominic [James Ashby], and another recruit head
over to the crime scene and begin their first vampire hunt. They look through a
nearby abandoned building and, sure enough, there's a coffin with a vampire in
it. Van Helsing tops the coffin with a branch of wild rose and begins firing
bullets into the coffin. On his 11th shot, the group is suddenly set upon by a
second vampire, and the fun begins.Meanwhile, Roman has learned that nurse Emily is Van Helsing's girlfriend, so he and Arianna wait in the hall for Emily to show
up. When Emily appears, Arianna has Roman bite her in the neck, then she falls
into Emily's arms begging for help. Emily takes Arianna, not to the emergency
room, but to the church where the slayers are training, also not noticing that
they're being followed by a slug of vampires. Suddenly, the vampires crash the
church and start beating up the slayers. When Van Helsing shows up holding a
cross, all the vampires disappear, taking Emily with them. Unfortunately for
Roman, he gets left behind [Roman is a bit retarded]. Van Helsing forces Roman
to reveal that the vampires have taken Emily to.an abandoned warehouse
where Sebastien is toying
with her, waiting for Van Helsing to show up. When Sebastien leaves Emily in
the care of another vampire, Emily loosens the bonds around her wrists and
suddenly springs forward, crucifix in hand. The vampire backs away, and Emily
then drinks a bottle of blessed Evian. Meanwhile, Sebastien is rallying his
vampires again. "We are vampires! Yeah! We are hunters! Yeah!" While the
vampires cheer for themselves, Van Helsing and his slayers are sneaking up on
them. Suddenly they burst into the warehouse, and it's every vampire and slayer
for himself. Van Helsing goes looking for Sebastian and Emily.Now comes the big showdown. Sebastien has changed into a bolero jacket
with red tails and cumberband. He and Van Helsing circle each other, making
small talk about the past. Off comes the Bolero jacket, revealing a white,
gauzy, long-sleeved shirt open to his waist. Van Helsing charges with stakes in
hand, but, even after all those years of living on cold rat blood, Sebastien is
definitely the better fighter. Van Helsing winds up on the ground with
Sebastien's foot on his stomach. Suddenly, Arianna takes this time to confront
Sebastien with his womanizing and let him know how much it hurts her. After
reminding Arianna who is the master, Sebastien slakes his thirst on Emily. He's
feeling pretty good about himself until he suddenly gets a tummyache and
realizes that Emily's blood contains holy Evian. Sebastien pounces on Van
Helsing anyway, but Van Helsing is able to run a stake through Sebastien's
heart. He then garrots Sebastian's head off his shoulders. Arianna gets stabbed
in the stomach but manages to get away.Now that Van Helsing has killed the last vampire prince, he prepares to
die, just as the deal was laid out. When it doesn't happen, he is puzzled. Does
it mean that God has rewarded him with the ability to live out the rest of his
life or does it mean that there is another vampire prince(ss) out there? [Original
synopsis by bj_kuehl]

Tags: violence, flashback

Review:
Usually I'm lenient towards even bad movies since I respect artists like actors and think that everybody is entitled to a mistake.Sometimes,even a bad movie has some acceptable moments and it even manages to throw the spotlight to a new potentially talented young actor/actress.This ,however,without a doubt is the most superficial and idiotic totally unconvincing horror film I have ever watched and the only horror one gets is out of its abysmally low level.It's a disgrace and a total waste of one's money and time.Companies or artists participating in such crimes against the cinema should be put away.I wonder how on earth these movie companies come out with decisions to produce such garbage.Don't they realise that it will hit them back big time?And the disrespect to the viewer is infuriating!!!
People, that loud whirring and rattling you can hear is the sound of Bram Stoker turning in his grave.*God* this film is bad.
Shoddy camera work, shoddy script, godawful sound which meant that a lot of the time the actors were inaudible (thank god) and the music SOHIGHINTHEMIX it made your ears bleed, and a baddie so lacking in charisma not even tight PVC/rubber trousers could save the day.
Imagine a movie with terrible actors, ghastly bad special effects, an anorexic plot, and no budget.This is worse.Please don't get me wrong...I love vampire movies...but this is one major waste of money..both to make, and for ANYONE to pay to see.As I watched the movie, I could see the director coaching the actors, "ok..now look scared...now...look horrified...now succumb...now go limp.
OMG...the actors lisped their way thru their lines like kids who have just put in their first cheap vampire fangs.
In order to hear and understand the dialog, you are required to elevate the volume so high that the "special effects sounds" become deafening.The action was limited, and the combat second rate.
The vampires movements were inconsistent and downright silly...sometimes they moved like listless zombies, other times like speed freaks, and still other times they "slinked" with bended knees, swaying arms and drunken swaggers as if trying to pretend to be cats.If this had been a movie with which I was in any way affiliated, I would never include it in my resume.
The general premise is decent enough - Van Helsing from the Dracula novels made a deal with God for immortality until all the major vampire lords are destroyed.And presumably, he kills off most of them.
There is some nudity and gore but very little on both accounts.The supporting actors are pretty bad, but I thought the guy who played Van Helsing did a pretty good job.
But not enough to make up for the fact that the vampires all look like two dollar hookers, the sound sucks, and the overall look is just plain cheap.
Everything about this movie is so bogus that they may actually be real locations which the directors (yes, it took two directors to cook this turkey) somehow managed to make look like models.With two directors you'd think that it might only be half-bad.
Rhett Giles as Van Helsing looks like a reject from the Pet Shop Boys, and his acting is nearly as overblown and stuffy as Ms. Boutte's.
In any case, the dialog is so cheesy you'd think it was written by the teen Gothtards from Saturday Night Live.If I see one more pseudo-Goth vampire movie with semi-clad model-pretty airheads melting into the arms of Ralph Lauren pretty men in ersatz under-populated nightclubs I'll puke up a kidney.
It's a travesty of the current state of B-movie straight to video horror that I don't even consider this one of the worst vampire flick out there.My Grade: D- Where I saw it: Starz on Demand (available till September 15th, 2005).
It actually sounded good...Van Helsing..Dracula...Time Travel..hmmmmmm.We got home and popped it in.
You couldn't hear a word being said at all, the acting was sub-par at best, the lighting was just atrocious, and worst of all...when I could hear the actors (yeah right) they sounded like they were talking around a wad of cotton.
Thinking that, ya know..Vampire movie..Bram Stoker..BRING IT!
I checked out the actors on the database, (this one, as I've found no other better as of yet) like I do for almost all movies I watch, and found that this movie was either a jumping point for brand new actors, a fill in for trying-but-not-quite-making-it actors, or a last ditch effort for dieing actors from a third rate soap opera!
A rather black mark on vampire movies as a whole, and NO credit to Bram Stoker what-so-ever.
I know I've seen worse, but Way Of The Vampire was high up there in the "WHY did I rent this" stakes.
I admire the reviewers of this abominable film who actually watched it all the way through.Thirty minutes was too much for me.
Abraham Van Helsing (Rhett Giles), who is immortal here, has assembled a "gang" of vampire slayers (no, they're not a Scooby gang like Buffy's).
Unfortunately, he left Sebastien with his wife, who Sebastien turned into a vampire while Van Helsing was out earning the bacon.The opening credits roll, and we are propelled into "The Present".
Van Helsing has moved to Los Angeles (to try to jumpstart a film career?) and naturally so has Sebastien and his current gang.
The stereo mix was horrible, and even the commentary track sounds like it was recorded in a large, empty bathroom.That took at least one solid point off of the film.
There is a lot of very strained agonizing in the film, such as vampires saying, "Oh, but what about Van Helsing" like a junior high drama student doing Hamlet on an audition tape.And there's more--or is that less?
Yes, Dracula is dispatched in the first few minutes, but focusing on Van Helsing or vampire slayers in the Bram Stoker universe isn't exactly novel, and neither is putting vampires in the modern world, especially Los Angeles.
But there are enough positive points that Way of the Vampire certainly isn't an F, and it's not quite bad enough to lose its credits.Bruce and Durao may be too fond of melodrama and not know how to do action scenes or check the work of sound engineers, but they're pretty good at directing cinematographers.
More could have been done with it--I would have liked to delve into Van Helsing as a doctor more, the new slayer gang would have been fun to get to know, and so on.
The Worst Vampire Movie I Have Ever Seen.
The F-grade acting, horrible cuts, sloppy dialogue, and lack of substantial story line make this the worst vampire movie I have ever seen.
It is absolutely essential that you counter balance the respect you will lose in vampire movies with the following; 'Interview with a Vampire' (For its incredible acting and top-notch story-line), 'Blade' (For its scientific, as opposed to religious, take on the disease and symptoms), and 'Underworld' (for its action-packed entertainment value).
Pretty cheesy movie, looks like a very low budget 80's horror flick.
We were surprised to know that this was a 2005 movie the way it looked they obviously didn't use any of the technology they have around today because all the blood and gore looked very fake.
The acting was horrible which would explain why we had never heard of any of the actors in the movie.So movie watchers be ware this movie is Not worth the money to rent, i would wait for them to play it on TV and hope the sound quality is fixed but I think it might even be too awful to be played on TV!.
it looks and sounds as if it was filmed on a home video camera the background audio overpowers the voices throughout the whole movie.
the sound effects have been repeated over and over, it seems everyone has the same scream the actor who played hell-sing cant even pronounce Nosferatu, he says "nosterfartu" how can the people that edited miss something so obvious, maybe they were too caught up in trying to make people disappear by stopping the camera, getting the actor to move out of screen then starting it again.
I really miss watching horror movies, just a good and gory film that you can just have fun with.
As always these movies are just bad, the script(which obviously had no research), the actors(who you can tell are the desperate waiters in LA, waiting for their "big break"), the effects(which could've been done by a 10 year old I know who's much better with computers), the editing(I think the editor, this must have been his first time because he went a little crazy), just everything about this movie is bad, but I'll try to explain the story.Van Helsing is given immortality to hunt down the vampire "princes" after the love of his life is turned into a vampire and he has killed her.
I guess get stung by a wasp who does apparently die by one sting, lol.Way of the Vampire is just one of those bad straight to DVD's that really sucks, believe me, I can't believe I fell for it, I know that I sometimes say that the ratings are wrong here on IMDb, but this is the rating I really wished I paid attention to the rating because I might have saved some time and money on this trash.
I intended to write this movie a proper review after watching it, but I quickly realised that it's just not worth it.There really is nothing good about this movie, it's just one big turd.The first time that I tried to watch it, I lasted 15 minutes.
It's not watchable.This is what's bad about the movies: -the acting -the plot -the special effects -the camera angles -the editing -the movie!.
Bram Stoker's WAY OF THE VAMPIRE With Rhett Giles, Denise Boutte.
Denise Boutte steals EVERY scene she is in as Vampiress and truly came into her own in 'DEATH VALLEY : Revenge Of Bloody Bill'.Vampire and hero have a connected past and both are immortal, Until modern times reunite them.Soundtrack is by SCORPIONS Ralph Rieckermann, And it sets the tone for a film that tries really hard to give the viewer a feeling of Gothic vibe at choice times..
While no "Way of the Teamsters" (the better prequel in this trillogy) this film offers a cinematic expose into the dark and gloomy world the undead.I wont spoil the many plot twists, many of which were hard to follow, especially since I saw the movie dubbed in Turkish while recovering from lasic eye surgery.
If I were to devise a top 10 of the worst ever Asylum movies, Way of the Vampire would almost certainly towards the top of that list.
Audibly it is just as so, with really bizarre and overly-loud sound effects and music that doesn't fit at all with the movie, almost as if there had been a last minute story change and they had no time to think of a new soundtrack, or even worse that they weren't even trying to make things mesh with one another.
The acting is atrocious, even from Rhett Giles, who has given decent performances before but is way over-the-top here that it is painful to watch him.
It features the characters Dracula and Van Helsing but these are literally the only two things this movie and Bram Stoker's novel have in common.I'm honestly still quite puzzled what this movie was supposed to be all about.
Perhaps all you simply need to know is that Van Helsing is hunting down Dracula.
At least not that I ever noticed.It's also true that I'm simply starting to get fed up with horror movies placing classic stories and characters in modern times.
It's too bad that us vampire- and horror lovers have to suffer because of that.A thing that I also really didn't liked about this movie was that it placed for too many characters in it.
At times the movie looks as if it got put together by a couple of high school students, who decided to make a cool vampire movie, in their spare time.No, I'll admit that it's not the worst or most annoying genre film I have ever seen (it's also simply luckily too short for that) but there still is basically no reason why anyone should ever watch this.3/10 http://bobafett1138.blogspot.com/.
This is without doubt the Worst Vampire Movie I have ever seen.
What else could I possible add to this review other than to say, it gives Vampires a bad name.This is without doubt the Worst Vampire Movie I have ever seen.
Leave it to the Asylum to put out what might be the worst vampire movie since Dracula 3000.
So, Van Helsing rounds up a new crew of vampire hunters.
I guess you could say this is trying to be something like BLADE meets VAN HELSING.
The guy who plays Van Helsing is trying to channel Hugh Jackman, and the guy that plays the vampire heavy is clearly going for a Stephen Dorff thing.
The worst thing you can do as a director is let a bad actor play a cowboy or a vampire.
Worst vampire movie ever.
Worst vampire movie ever.
Van Helsing gets to live forever and he kills some vampires.
It has some really weak secondary love story but since the primary thing doesn't work you really won't notice it.I was hoping to get a new great Bram Stoker Dracula experience and I remember thinking that the beginning was so bad that the rest of the movie could only get better but I was wrong.
It only turned from bad to worse.Well the story really isn't bad, or maybe it is, but the worst thing about the movie is the acting, directing, camera control and sound which actually doesn't leave much left to be thrilled about.
That is why I am trying to see all the movies from Harry Medved's book "The 50 Worst Films of All Time" as well as all of the Bottom 100 from IMDb. Masochism is the only thing that would explain it.
On the other hand, "Way of the Vampire" was exactly what the masochist within me was seeking--a really, really bad film!
The other $35 dollars in the budget was spent for acting and script and stock footage--so it's no wonder that the film looks like a bad YouTube submission!
But, "Way of the Vampire" is very different in that it looks great--a lot of money was spent on special effects and it looks professional.
Imagine...it's a film where everyone talks like pained über-Goths--all the time and in every scene.
It's absolutely terrible but also very funny because it's oh so bad.In addition to horrendous dialog that would embarrass most 7th graders, the film pretty much ignores all the vampire canon out there.
Watch "Way of the Vampire" and you'll catch his method in action.And, because apparently a review has to be 10 lines long; here's a plot summary (note that it's not that extensive for a reason): -Van Helsing kills Dracula -Dracula's Butt Monkey gets it on with Van Helsing's wife -Van Helsing kills his adulterous spouse because she's all vamped out.
Lead Rhett Giles, who interprets Van Helsing as if he were addicted to Mogadon, is particularly bad, but everyone else is also dreadful, especially lead vampire bride Denise Boutte.
Bram Stoker's Way of the Vampire.It seems cruel to use the name of a talented writer like him, to sell what has to be the worst vampire movie I had ever watched.
The only good thing was the movie ended.I mean I should have picked up it was bad by the use of the papyrus font on the back of the DVD.
Do not put yourself through watching 'Way of the Vampire'..
The sound - I could NOT hear almost half the dialogue been said - because the music (the score which suspiciously sounds a lot like War of the Worlds - surprise) and effects were turned up to completely drown out the inferior dialogue (perhaps this was intentional?) One positive thing I can say is that Mr. Latt knows how to turn out product, and one should keep in mind that this is a low budget film.
Everything was bad here, from the script, the acting, the fake Van Helsing calling the clowns he trained "slayers" is one of the biggest laughs in the movie.
I have to put 10 lines here, there is nothing at all good to say here and as this is my 1st time, I'm not exactly sure if I can say exactly what I feel about this movie.
Take a concept with potential, turn it into deadly- dull dialog for an incompetent screen play and you have a movie not worth anyone's time.In fact, I couldn't watch it all.
I did watch the last 5 minutes or so and that's why I'm going to check the *spoiler* box, though I don't think any reviewer comments could spoil this sack of cynicism.The final fight scene is like the worst pro-wrestling you've ever seen: they had to slow down the fight so they could get all the lines said.
NO WAY.This is truly one of THE worst films I have ever seen, in decades of watching a few thousand flicks.
"Braw Stoker's Way of the Vampire" is a below decent vampire film.**SPOILERS**A hundred years ago, Dr. Abraham Van Helsing, (Rhett Giles) tracked down a coven of followers of Vampire Count Dracula, (Paul Logan) and nearly destroys the group.
Gathering a crew to face the vampire, Van Helsing launches an assault on the vampire hideout.The Good News: There wasn't a whole lot to this film that was really stand-out.
The film practically grinds to a halt when the series of Van Helsing training the vampire hunters in montage, which really destroys the momentum gathered up to that point.
Vampires and Van Helsing.
Vampires attack Van Helsing.