Gymkata
Tags: violence

Plot synopsis:
Jonathan Cabot (Thomas) is approached by the Special Intelligence Agency (SIA) to play "the Game". The Game is an athletic competition in the fictional country of Parmistan, a tiny mountain nation which is supposedly located in the Hindu Kush mountain range. Parmistan forces all foreigners to play the Game, which is basically an endurance race with obstacles, all the while being chased by local Parmistan warriors. If a person wins, then they are granted their life and a wish. The SIA wants Cabot to win the game so that he can use his wish to install a US satellite monitoring station, which could monitor all satellites in space and act as an early warning system in case of nuclear attack. Cabot is told that the system could save millions of lives. As an extra incentive, Cabot is also told that his father (who went missing) was actually a SIA operative who was sent to play the game but was never heard from again. After a training period with martial arts teacher, Japanese guru, and a beautiful Parmistan princess named Princess Rubali (Tetchie Agbayani) he is deemed ready and sent to the town of Karabal, on the Caspian Sea for infiltration into Parmistan.
While in Karabal, he is attacked by terrorist agents who kidnap Princess Rubali. Jonathan Cabot quickly raids the terrorist training center and, using his "gymkata" fighting style that combined gymnastics with karate, disables dozens of terrorists before rescuing the Princess and returning to the salt mine where he is staying. However, when he returns he finds out that his handler has betrayed him to the enemy. Luckily, the "special intelligence agency" arrives in the nick of time to save him.
Finally, Cabot and Rubali use a raft to float down the river into Parmistan where they are promptly seized by Parmistan warriors and, after a fight, Cabot is knocked out. When Cabot wakes up, he is in the King's palace and is greeted by other players of the Game who also have arrived to play it. While waiting for the Game to start, Cabot learns from the Princess that the King's right-hand man and manager of the Game, Commander Zamir, is actually planning a coup against the King and will attempt to sell the satellite rights to the enemy. Zamir also intends to marry Princess Rubali.
With all this in mind, Cabot starts the Game but soon learns that Zamir won't play fair, and constantly breaks the strict rules of the Game in order to kill Cabot. Meanwhile, the King's forces have been overpowered by Zamir's private army in the coup attempt which the King is tricked into believing is a set of security measures for his protection.
Fighting many obstacles, Cabot is the only player left in the game and is about to be killed by crazed villagers when he is saved by a Parmistan warrior who turns out to be Cabot's father. His father explains that while playing the game he fell and disabled his arm, but was allowed by Parmistan warriors to live. As the two are catching up, Zamir fires an arrow into Cabot's father, who in a hushed voice tells Cabot to go on and win the race. Cabot races off, chased by Zamir's army. He is able to make his horse jump a gorge and gets away while only Zamir is brave enough to follow. Seeing that Zamir won't let him escape, Cabot decides to take him on and after a prolonged fight Cabot's gymkata skills allow him to defeat Zamir.
Meanwhile, Princess Rubali finally convinces the King that Zamir is plotting to overthrow the monarchy. Using their combined fighting skills, the Princess and the King attack Zamir's men before encouraging the citizens of Parmistan to rise up and seize the rest. As the crowd takes down Zamir's army someone cries out that a contestant is approaching the finish line. As everyone runs to see who made it, Princess Rubali is thrilled to see that Cabot is riding in on a horse, leading his arrow-punctured but still alive father on another horse. The crowd seizes on the champion and as the movie ends, the audience is informed that in 1985 the first satellite monitoring station was installed.

Review: Also, we get the privilege of seeing a shadowy government agent push away a gymnastics groupie who tries to get too close to a post-dismount Kurt Thomas.If you happen across this movie, you must watch it.
We used to watch it for its tremendous entertainment value as an all-time great "bad" movie.
My own personal favorite parts are the pommel horse in the medieval lunatic asylum, the guy saying "there is some anti-American sentiment going around here" immediately before being shot with an arrow, and of course the "Yak-MALLA!" war cry of "Parmistan." Oh, yeah, the four or five repetitions of "Karabal, on the Caspian Sea" before the place is shown with just that as the caption on the screen.Yak-MALLA indeed!JP Marat L'Ami du Peuple.
If you watch "Gymkata" expecting to see a solid performance by an Olympic gymnast, then you are missing the allure this film has on so many 28-35 year old men that secretly rent this title at least once a year ...
Martial Artist chosen by government to go to some isolated little known area of the world to help the United States' cause by outwardly competing in some kind of competition/game.So given its obvious reaching for Enter the Dragon memories, you would think Clouse would have made an attempt to grab some good actors, the kind of martial artists that could easily impress the audience with their moves.
My honest guess is that after Kurt Thomas won the gold medal, some money grubbing crazy producer (the kind responsible for making 7th sequels and whatnot) decided to capitalize on gold medal fame by starring a gymnast in a martial arts movie, then proceeding to blackmail Robert Clouse into directing such a film, and Clouse in his attempt to get back at his blackmailer, sabotaged his own film by putting a bunch of bad-acting white guys who can't fight in a martial arts genre movie, sticking in poorly developed subplots such as the love story between the princess and the gymnast, and overall making a movie that any director would sit back, watch on the big screen, take the ONLY copy of the film, lock it in an iron chest, and bury deep within the earth's core..
But take it from me, if you enjoy watching poor, yet goofy, movies, you will enjoy "Gymkata" a great deal.The action centers around a gymnast who is chosen by government agents (at least I think they were government agents) to become a spy.
You see his dad was another quasi-government agent, who has gone missing competing in this game, called, eloquently, "The Game."  So the gymnast (played blandly by Kurt Thomas) trains to compete in this game and find out what happened to his lost dad.Sounds promising doesn't it?
Like the gymnast's mysterious Asian girlfriend, who doesn't speak for the first half hour of the movie, then all of a sudden begins to talk, and doesn't shut up for the rest of the time!
Since our protagonist is a gymnast, the director thought it wise to stick gymnastic equipment into the back alleys and town squares of Middle Eastern cities, so that our Gymkata master would be better able to use his gymnast skills to fight the scourge of evil on parallel bars and pummel horses.
They should've gotten combat pay.The US government goes to a gymnast to get him to train for and participate in The Game, a decathlon cum obstacle course held each year in the tiny country of Parmistan (the four of us immediately decided its major export was Parmesan cheese...).
(_Gymkata_ was filmed in Zagreb, then in Yugoslavia.) There are people who want to stop him, though--fortunately, every place our hero is in danger, there happens to be a convenient piece of gymnastic equipment that he can leap onto and kick some enemy behind.
Imagine you were between 7-13 years old, then while your dad just finished watching his boring news, you finally get one of those huge black remote control from the 80s, with no time to waste, you turn to channel 4, damn, you missed the opening credits of Gymkata and Joseph, your lazy neighbor'd bet he was going to watch it for the 100st time while you never had a chance to see it all.But you don't complain, because the fight is on and you are so taken away because the good guy, all the way in the movie wont be landing his feet, thats right,he uses his hands to stay on the ground while his feet is kicking all the weird people from this weird village.
It is not meant to be a serious work of art (at least I hope not), it is meant to be a fast paced, entertaining vehicle for showing off Kurt Thomas's ample gymnastic abilities in the most contrived situations imaginable (spot the high bar (and chalk) between two buildings).
A gymnast (Oh brother!) played by Kurt Thomas who has the necessary skills to win in a game which involves ninjas, a village of crazies and Richard Norton who is told by Kurt Thomas "to keep his hardware in his pants." (His exact words) I missed this in theaters and it's a good reason because I would have probably been kicked out due to the laughing I broke into at regular intervals.
Dumb-Fu. Looking like a bizarro MacGyver and armed with a deadly gymnastics/karate hybrid fighting style, real life gymnastics champ Kurt Thomas flips, kicks and spins his way though a host of vaguely ethnic baddies in the fictional nation of Parmistan.
Thankfully, there are plenty of uneven bars and pommel horses in Parmistan.Maxim once voted 'Gymkata' the 17th worst film of all-time, but honestly it's pretty entertaining.
The plot is beyond dumb and the acting is atrocious, but the fight scenes are a blast thanks to some creative choreography, the real life skills of Thomas and a director who knows the genre in Robert Clouse ('Enter the Dragon', 'Blackbelt Jones', 'The Big Brawl' and 'China O'Brien 1 & 2')..
Thomas flips for her and everyone else..."Gymkata" is meant to combine Thomas's "Gymnastics" with "Karate" as a martial arts sub-genre movie.
Thomas makes his way to a town center, finds a pummel horse and begins gymnastically taking down people.
In this film, Thomas is recruited to go into the tiny country of Parmistan and win "The Game" in order for Parmistan to allow the United States to install a satellite monitoring station as part of the Star Wars program.
It all makes the kind of sense that doesn't.Mulleted Kurt Thomas is perhaps the most unlikely action star ever, with his all-American boyish looks and diminutive size.
The "village of the crazies" part is actually pretty cool with some creepy atmosphere as Thomas is chased through the foggy streets by lunatics.The '80s was a wonderful decade for "fun" movies.
But IMDb calls me at least 10 lines for each review.Another thing I can say about the movie is how the character is just a bar of gymnastics or other elements of their discipline, it is very real.
I was laid in bed as Gym Kata arrived in my head and all the memories came flying back at once - the burning rope, the Chinese dude, the weird town with the people with two faces...but thats it - i don't remember much about why this gymnast is running around what i'm guessing is siberia/Russia???...ahh another memory - isn't it because of his father?.......its all coming back to me.excellent 80's film - 8 out of ten for back then (1980's) but i really couldn't grade it by todays standards - its just not fair to do so as they didn't have technology back then.
This is one of my all-time favorite movies -- little Kurt Thomas as gymnast/martial artist/US agent -- what a concept, and from start to finish the laughs just keep coming!
Pay attention to the start of "The Game" (the real one with Kurt Thomas, not the first "demonstration" one) and watch one of the villagers get creamed by a horse!
From Cabot's wild-style mullet/sweater combo to Parmistan (and it's four billion assorted ninjas), everything about this film reeks of crap.Directed by Robert Clouse, the infamous mind that brought you the mirror scene in Bruce Lee's Game of Death, he once again showcases his complete lack of directing talent.
A few other faces you most likely won't recognize will appear for your enjoyment as well, from Buck Kartalian to Tadashi Yamashita, although you won't remember them or care about them after the movie is done.Supposedly based on a book called "The Terrible Game," which, if I could find a single trace of it's existence anywhere I would be interested in reading it, to see where this thing went wrong.
But then, what can you expect in an action film that features Buck Kartalian?The real star is Kurt Thomas, or at least that's what the credits say.
Let's just say as an actor, Thomas makes a great gymnast.Which is all this movie really calls for.
No, he is instead trained in the lethal art of gymkata, which consists of walking up a stairway using only your hands, carrying on a conversation with yourself with intermittent back-flips thrown in every so often and hoping and praying to God that wherever you fight there will be uneven bars, pummel horses and other gymnastic-looking pieces of architecture about.Why all the training?
Gymnastics superstar Johnathan Cabot, played by real life Olympic medalist Kurt Thomas and his mullet, is tasked by the government to to be their emissary to Parmistan.
so if it doesn't bore you, and maybe you have some retro fondness for this era and this film genre in particular, it might be an 8/10 for you.Ludicrous Reagan-era action film in which Kurt Thomas, a real-life champion gymnast, stars as a champion gymnast who is recruited by the government to travel to the west Asian country of Parmistan and participate in the "Game", wherein the contestants are hunted while they try to make their way to the finish line.
Once in the game, he must fight the other participants as well as Parmistan's ruler's right hand man, the evil Zamir (D-movie regular Richard Norton).
What perils await our mulleted hero as he tries to escape the Village of the Crazies?Co-starring veteran goofball Buck Kartalian as Parmistan's ruler, Tetchie Agbayani as his beautiful daughter, and a few lesser known action regulars, like Bob Schott and Conan Lee. This movie moves from one absurd set-piece to another, and is well worth seeing just for the head-scratching sequence in the Village of the Crazies.
It's all set to a blatantly manipulative, rousing soundtrack composed by Alfi Kabiljo.Real-life champion gymnast Kurt Thomas stars as Jonathan Cabot, an athlete convinced by his government to participate in a "game" that takes place in the distant country of "Parmistan".
Jonathan duels with an evil assistant (Aussie martial arts icon Richard Norton) to the country's ruler (Buck Kartalian), fights off a thuggish competitor (Bob Schott), and falls in love with the rulers' luscious daughter (Filipino hottie Tetchie Agbayani).Along with truly laugh-out-loud moments and moments of moderate excitement, we get a fairly blazing pace and a pretty colourful atmosphere.
Maybe not, but one can't deny the entertainment value, as the utter cheesiness is served to us with some style by martial arts movie veteran Robert Clouse (of "Enter the Dragon" fame).Eight out of 10..
US Olympic gymnast Kurt Thomas travels to a mysterious fictional European country to complete in a deadly tournament that's a mix of Han's martial arts tournament in "Enter the Dragon" and the plot from "The Most Dangerous Game." Overall, this film is a mess, but it's so awful that's it's absolutely hilarious.
Only watch this film for ironic camp value and look somewhere else if you want good fight sequences.
despite the fact that this film is pretty poorly done from from every every aspect you can think of,it's still manages to be a guilty pleasure.it comes off more as a Mel Brooks parody type of a movie than an actual serous attempt at film making,although it does try to take itself seriously,which of course makes it all the more funny.there are definitely a lot of eye rolling moments here.and yet,this is nowhere near as bad as many so called movies floating around out there.there's some entertainment value here,and it isn't all that painful to watch,relatively speaking.try Dark Town,or Dracula 3000,if you really want to know pain,and then get back to me.as for this one,i give it a 7/10.
Well, as others have quite rightly pointed out, this stands proud as a bad movie delight; From the preposterous plot to the absurdly, fortuitously placed gymnastics equipment, a likable yet curiously wimpish hero and even B-movie stalwart and martial arts expert Richard Norton playing the bad guy here, this has all the ingredients for a great time with friends and copious amounts of alcohol.Having said this, director Robert Clouse who brought us the classic Enter The Dragon, does show off a number of very well executed sequences in this which momentarily raise the picture to a higher level altogether - most notably in the often cited scenes set in a village exclusively populated by the criminally insane; Indeed, this segment of the film evokes an incredibly unique, creepy atmosphere the like that has seldom since been seen in any other film in my opinion (and I'm being serious here).In summary, if it's some harmless, carefree (and somewhat absurd) fun you're looking for, Gymkata certainly delivers the goods..
Although I had seen "Gymkata" in a theater way back in '85, I couldn't remember anything of the plot except for vague images of Kurt Thomas running and fighting against a backdrop of stone walls and disappointment regarding the ending.After reading some of the other reviews I picked up a copy of the newly released DVD to once again enter the world of Gymkata.It turns out this is one of those films produced during the '80s that would go directly to video today.
The film stars champion gymnast Kurt Thomas as Jonathan Cabot, recruited out of the blue to infiltrate the nation of "Parmistan" to enter and hopefully win "The Game," a suicidal bloodsport sponsored by the Khan who encourages his people by yelling what sounds like "Yak Power." The goal of the mission involves the Star Wars defense system.
Needless to say Cabot finds himself running and fighting for his life along the stone streets of Parmistan, on his way to a date with destiny, and the Game.Star, Kurt Thomas was ill served by director Robert Clouse, who it looks like was never on the set.
hehe  And third, while we have a generally decent acting supporting cast (including the required hot chick!), an actually not-so-bad story, and some cool visuals; the dialogue, fight scenes involving gymnastics (hilarious!), and overall execution of the plot are weak.
People love to rip on this camp classic, but I have probably seen this movie as many times as Star Wars.
lady in the village of the crazies, and a plot that is a convenient afterthought to the creation of a context where Thomas' gymnastics skills can be highlighted.As if one bad movie about Gymnastics wasn't enough, Mitch Gaylord decided he'd give it a shot in American Anthem, which came out a year later.Unfortunately, this Gem is not available on DVD.-CNW.
This movie is not so terrible to watch if you can appreciate the gymnastics & martial arts sequences for what they're worth.
Quite possibly the worst film ever made.The acting is embarrassing, but you can't really blame Kurt Thomas, he's a gymnast, not an actor.
However, aside from the forced coupling of gymnastics and martial arts, the bad dubbing, the stiff dialog, and the outrageously difficult story-line, the film has some things going for it.
My favorite was the rock that was shaped like a vault, complete with "handles".Thomas was a gold medalist at the Olympics, so this as well as boyish good looks got him this movie deal, carrying on the great tradition of Bruce Jenner in "Can't Stop the Music".
wacky gymnastics-meets-martial-arts movie.
One classic scene involves Kurt Thomas just happening to find a pommel-horse in the middle of a village square (which he uses to pummel the bad guys.) Another is the trek into the "Village of Crazies." Too bad this movie wasn't made to be a farce, or it may have gotten better ratings..
American champion gymnast Jonathan Cabot (woodenly played by handsome and muscular real-life Olympic champion gymnast Kurt Thomas) travels to the remote country of Parmiston to participate in a deadly competition that hasn't been won by an outsider in 900 years.Director Robert Clouse, working from Charles Robert Carner's patently absurd script, treats the laughably ridiculous premise with utmost misguided seriousness, stages the martial arts fights with aplomb, and keeps the enjoyably inane story moving along at a snappy pace.
An era when anyone with a few flashy kicks and a mullet could be the star of a martial arts turkey.The premise is silly, the acting often poor (especially our hero) and the convenient placement of Gymastics equipment is laughable.However, Tetchie Agbayani is gorgeous, the village of crazies really is pretty crazy and there's plenty of action to keep things ticking over once our hero arrives in Parmistan.
Wow.But still, being such a bad movie, it can be great fun to watch.
The cover alone, depicting ninjas with machine guns, was enough to get me to rent this film.But if I were ever to meet Kurt Thomas (the gymnast-star) in real life, I would probably kick him in the face after a double somersault with 2 1/2 twists in the layout position..
If anyone ever asks him to perform in a martial arts film again, I'll bet that Thomas kicks the guy in the face..
The idea of combining gymnastics and martial arts is the basis for this movie.
Kurt Thomas never made another movie which is also surprising since he had the good looks and ripped body of a Hollywood star.
Gymkata seems to be a fighting form that combines gymnastics with some generic un-named martial art.