In general, the term should be avoided. Spoken aloud with a disgusted inflection, it's pejorative. So is the word 'Jew' in similar circumstances. In general, the use of judgemental or pejorative terms, even if no offense is intended, should be avoided. They only serve to incite anger and side-track the conversation.
True conversation comes from being factual and appropriately neutral.
The FAQ is a collection of documents that is an attempt to answer questions that are continually asked on the soc.culture.jewish family of newsgroups. It was written by cooperating laypeople from the various Judaic movements. Hopefully, the FAQ will provide the answer to your questions. The FAQ maintainer will endeavor to direct your query to an appropriate individual that can answer it.