60 inches of nothing but shaft 7. You get to man the keg at band parties 6. We don't need no stinking valves 3. Being kinky is not a good thing 2. The Trombone is a Brass instrument.
Trombonists know all the positions.
The ability to pop a woodwind player in the back of the head from 4 feet away. The Trombone is the greatest of all Brasses. Trombonists don't finger, they just slide. The way all the water in the horn drains out onto you when you pressbox. The Trombone is lighter than the euphonium.