Marriage is all about the generation and fostering of human life. Secular individualism is not. Marriage is all about understanding about what kind of a God God is. Secularism seeks to dismiss God. Marriage is all about living together in a community, a community of committed love and bonded caring forever.
Secular individualism is only about caring for the feelings of individuals.
If it doesn't feel good, dump it or kill it. In the culture wars going on in the world around us, the secularist argument is dominant in the movie, television and newspaper media, while the arguments of believers are to be found more in the radio talk shows. I am just speaking here of what is usually to be found. So when you hear talk about abortion, promiscuity, adultery, premarital sex, the gay lifestyle, contraception, divorce and remarriage, and now cloning, realize that they each have some connection with the central meaning, value and purpose of marriage. For if he comes to the party, then all that we have watered down and dumbed down in terms of human values and purposes in life, all those gallons of water in six stone water jars will be changed.