This phenomenon is quite rare among men. They may form new, deep, nonsexual friendships at any age, but these do not tend to change the stimuli that are associated with sexual arousal. In fact, many a gay man, married and loving his wife, is bitterly disappointed because a longed-for sexual kindling effect never occurs. Rather, his sexual passion remains directed toward other men. This suggests that women are more plastic with regard to stimuli that elicit sexual arousal as compared to men.
Women seem to have more sexual options throughout the life cycle.
The Therapeutic Situation During psychotherapy, men are more likely than women to directly discuss erotic fantasies and activities in an organ-focused, nonrelational way. Partners are described in terms of body parts, willingness to participate in sexual experimentation and capacity for sexual arousal. This is true regardless of the sexual orientation of the patient. Gay men, for example, are likely to be drawn to partners on the basis of their physical characteristics and include genitalia in the imagery of desire. Similarly, heterosexual men are often drawn to body shape, in keeping with images of feminine beauty that are an integral part of our mass culture.