Girl, who is engaged only, then both sides observe Sutak. When a son dies and the father is alive, then the father cannot apply or light the funeral pyre, and there is no Sapindi ceremony. The living son performs the ten day ceremony for the soul and not for the body. Living son performs the ceremony to liberate from father's debt. If there are many sons, any one son can perform the ten-day ceremony.
Sons staying apart can each perform the ceremony.
Final rites for the mother and for the father, done according to scriptures, yield fruits that are equal to making Parikrama or circumambulation of earth. Garuda Purana explains the make up of the physical body as well as the subtle body with the six Chakras, and advises that we breathe 21600 times during 24 hours and that each inhaling and exhaling be made into an act of japa mala with such mantras as Soham, Hare Ram etc. The human body is subject to disease, old age, infirmity etc. While the senses are working, practice self-realisation. Therefore make good use of time for self-realisation.