It also influences our feelings about others and everything else in our lives. What is shame Shame is an unhealthy sense of self-worth that is distorted, exaggerated and utterly out of touch with reality. It is a feeling of profound inadequacy that becomes the core, the center, of one's thoughts and feelings. Let's illustrate this. Think of our personhood as being a piece of fabric.
Shame involves the entire fabric of the person.
The urge is to hide and protect one's self from exposure. Some women cut and burn themselves, some starve themselves as a form of self-punishment. Some act obnoxious so others will reject them because they reject themselves. Many confuse this self-hatred with humility. It is not.