You may be a little bit stuck. It may be that the two of you have talked more about your anger, or the whys and wherefores, and you haven't gotten to a deeper emotional level yet. People take about a year at best to really move on. And some people take longer. It's important to remember it as an indicator of what both of you need to work on in your relationship, but not to hang onto it to beat each other over the head with.
Some people try to forgive prematurely.
I want to know how to help my children who have been damaged due to my ex-husband's affair. Family secrets are damaging, so the kids do need to know something. Kids need to know what's happening in the family, but a young child wouldn't even know what an affair is. Up until about age 8 or 9, that kind of response works. Sometimes that's not possible.