The queen goes on the first row on the same color box as the color of your pieces. So if you are the black pieces, put the queen on the remaining black, in the first row, and put the king on the remaining white square. If you are the white pieces, put the queen on the remaining white square and the king on black. Line up all your pawns on the second row. Your queen will always face your opponent's queen.
Same thing goes for the king.
And not normal weirdos, like the people who talk to you at the bus stop, even though you are obviously not going to respond. Chess players are proud to be among the weirdest souls on earth. And just in case things weren't complicated enough, each rank has a number and each file has a letter, so that everybody can follow what's going on. Moe's king is on e8. You always list the rank, then the file.