Saying good-bye is your final gift of love to your loved one, for it achieves closure and makes the final release possible. It may be helpful to lay in bed and hold the person, or to take his or her hand and then say everything you need to say. It may be as simple as saying, I love you. It may include recounting favorite memories, places, and activities you shared. It may include saying, I m sorry for whatever I contributed to any tension or difficulties in our relationship.
Tears are a normal and natural part of saying good-bye.
Tears do not need to be hidden from your loved one or apologized for. Tears express your love and help you to let go. Although you may be prepared for the death process, you may not be prepared for the actual death moment. It may be helpful for you and your family to think about and discuss what you would do if you were the one present at the death moment. The death of a hospice patient is not an emergency.