Girls in all age groups would face each other and immediately began to talk, eventually ending up discussing the problems of one girl. For boys, activities, doing things together, are central. Just sitting and talking is not an essential part of friendship. They're friends with the boys they do things with. It's not hard, from even these simple observations, to see the potential problems when men and women communicate.
Women create feelings of closeness by conversing with their friends and lovers.
Men don't use communication in this way, so they can't figure out why their women are continually talk, talk, talking. Eventually, many men just tune their women out. The ubiquitous image of the housewife at the breakfast table talking to her husband who has his head buried in the newspaper comes to mind. Tannen notes that men are confused by the various ways women use conversation to be intimate with others. I tell you my troubles, you tell me your troubles, and we're close.