Attend their activities. Don't lean on your children emotionally and have them take care of you. Allow them to lean on you for support. Let them know what is expected of them in social situations but don't make them act like little adults in every situation. Self esteem results from self respect and respect from others.
Self respect includes competence, confidence, mastery, achievement, independence and freedom.
Respect from others includes recognition, acceptance, status, and appreciation. Healthy self-esteem is a realistic appraisal of one's capacities and begins with deserved respect from others. When these needs are not met, a child grows up feeling discouraged, weak and inferior. He or she is then vulnerable to finding other ways of being accepted outside of the family and is then susceptible to looking for acceptance from other groups like gangs and is vulnerable to peer pressure and acquiring feelings of acceptance through sex, drugs and alcohol. Positive self-esteem means having confidence, a child knows who they are in the world and does not have to fit in to be accepted.