Ritual is perhaps the oldest and most sucessful way of bridging this gap. It is just as important to develop personal rituals as it is to develop formal rituals. It varies from tradition to tradition, as it does from Protestant to Catholic to Jewish. One of the things you may need to keep in mind is 'allergies'. Instead of using the oils and incense, try using 'symbolization'.
Symbolization is everything.
I am sure the Goddess and God would not be offended by your alergies and what you need to do to make a ritual work for you. Designing a ritual is much like writing a term paper for school. If you have had little experience with these, you may feel silly when you first start. They can be invaluable in removing you from the world of your everyday life and involving you directly in the ritual. There are many reference works on symbols that list the associations that various cultures have made with colors, scents, and shapes over the centuries.