Although you can't count on it, you will probably get some responses from guests who are unable to attend. With luck, you may be able to then use these spaces to accommodate dates of people who make a special request. In lieu of gifts to the guests we have decided to make a donation to a charity we support. Any advice would be appreciated. However, the issue here isn't how you should be informing guests about the donation, but whether it's appropriate to be donating in lieu of the gifts, or bonbonieres, as they're often called.
Some couples ask that donations be made in lieu of wedding gifts.
They are waiving their own presents and, for this reason, the gesture is acceptable. Bonbonierres, on the other hand, are given as a token of appreciation to friends and family for their support and attendance. Furthermore, by making an announcement, you will be drawing attention to your monetary gift, which is never considered decorous. Although bonbonnieres are traditional at many Canadian weddings, there's no rule that you must give them out. If you want to forgo them, it's fine to do so, but it's best not to link the decision to a donation.