To listen actively and to understand is not a passive or simple activity. Listening for associated feelings of the problem as well as the content vs. simply focusing on the facts of the problem and missing the feelings expressed or implied. Reflecting, clarifying or paraphrasing what the person has said to check out if you have heard it as the person feels it, vs. not taking the time to assure your understanding. Occasional summarizing of what the student says also shows that you are following their concern. Conveying a sense of welcome, acceptance and respect, vs. showing annoyance, restlessness or disdain.
Silence is golden.
Silence helps to ease anxiety. Giving Effective Feedback Feedback is communicating to a member or group how their behavior has affected us or other people. It is the information that flows between people that has to do with their interaction in the here and now. Effective feedback, both positive and negative, is helpful to others. When you give feedback you are offering valuable information that will be useful to another person making decisions about how to behave.