It is only accomplished through the power of the Holy Spirit who indwells us. A Biblical marriage becomes unbiblical and lopsided and quite unhealthy when the pursuit of power and control enters in. The Bible admonishes husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for her. It is to be a sacrificial love, one that humbles itself and forsakes its power and control. Submission is not meant to be a form of masochism.
Submission is an expression of love.
Abuse, being sin and therefore being evil, twists what was meant for good into a hideous characature of what was supposed to be. Submission to sin is not at all what the Lord intended wives to do. If a man is abusing his wife it is sin. For a woman to submit herself to that abuse without confronting it is submitting to sin. It isn't righteous and it isn't Godly persecution.