The next day, my husband attended an AA meeting. We were able to keep our family intact, continuously moving towards healing. I reallywas comfortable and peaceful with my decision to end the marriage. There isn't any other kind of real love. Ultimatums, 'or else' declarations made to another person, are an attempt to alter, control, coerce or force obedience with threats of punishment.
Ultimatums are, by their very nature, all inclusively conditional.
It can leadthose affected to the conclusion that the only option left in stopping the madness and regaining peace of mind is to cut the alcoholic out of their life. Sometimes that may be true. There are unfortunate circumstances that require this action. However, telling a loved one they are welcome to the embrace of the love from their family on the condition they stop drinking is an ultimatum. Ultimatums are not uncommon within an alcoholic family and are usually made as a last ditch desperate attemptto stop the chaos and pain.