A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. Married men live longer than single men - but married men are a lot more willing to die. Any married man should forget his mistakes - there's no use in two people remembering the same thing. Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does. A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. To their credit, men do not decorate their penmanship.