If he's not home, you're welcome to take a look at it, photograph yourself with it, etc. Please don't attempt to operate the ass-kicker without Bob present, as it has been shown to be somewhat dangerous. The design is simple and rugged. A six-foot waterwheel is cut from thick plywood and equipped with vanes that are driven by a stream of water falling from above. The valve controls the water flow, and after driving the wheel, the water drains back into the underground tank.
Water level is maintained by rainwater collected from an adjoining gazebo roof.
At each end of the 2x4, there's a used green suede tennis shoe tacked to a piece of lumber. See this detailed technical discussion of the ass-kicker for extensive details on its operation. We are almost certain it kicks big-time ass. The rate of ass-kicking is controlled by the water flow control valve. The World's Only Ass-Kicking Machine is located in Wirtz, Virginia, about 25 miles southeast of Roanoke, and about 25 miles south of Bedford.