Lawyers are also thick-skinned. Easily identified by their humorlessness and abrasive personalities, they are the bane of many social gatherings. A shark will swallow anything up to half its own size in one gulp. Several hundred years ago, a naturalist wrote that the headless body of a knight in armor was found in a white shark s stomach. Lawyers, too, will swallow anything even their pride as increasing numbers of lawyer hopefuls trudge to law school each year for three years of browbeating in the hopes of financing their Porsches.
Some sharks even prey on their own kind.
The smell and taste of blood in the water can trigger them into an obsessed feeding frenzy, in which they often eat their own bodies while twisting and turning to get more food. This is not unlike the litigation frenzy, where lawyers are pitted against other lawyers, and ultimately themselves, to waste reams of paper while losing sight of a fair resolution for their clients. Ichthyologists scientists who study fish contend that sharks, dreaded carnivores of the deep, have simply been given a bad rap. They may stalk, snap at and swallow their prey alive, but, after all, they have to eat. So far, no one has successfully defended lawyers for preying on an unwitting public.