On the other hand, when the family system is disturbed, individual members may develop their own symptoms, or their own vulnerabilities are triggered. Many times, problems in and between the adult members of a family cause or exacerbate individual problems. When, for example, the relationship between parents is highly conflictual, consistently angry, or deeply frustrated, children are inevitably affected. No matter how much the parents may try to protect their children from their conflicts and disturbances, children are by their very nature sensitive to their parents' internal and actual experiences. In many cases, its not so easy to disguise the fact that one is deeply angry, disappointed, or distressed.
Some parents communicate their troubles directly, in what they say.
But many more, communicate indirectly, through their parenting. Frequently, the result is parenting that is abusive, neglectful, flagrantly inconsistent and unpredictable. All this can, and does, cause the child pain. And when the trouble and pain are incessant, a child may develop emotional or behavior problems in response. Or, whatever internal difficulties or biological vulnerabilities a child carries become exacerbated.