This creates rigidity which over time becomes armoring in the body. The natural sensitivity for the more subtle sensations and feelings is lost. They've also lost the intimate connection with themselves and the richness of the whole erotic body. Their experience is a very limited one strictly localized in the genital area. For most men, orgasm equals ejaculation and love making becomes a performance and a race to orgasm.
Sex easily becomes a routine to release stress.
The compulsive need for outside sources of stimulation such as pornography and the use of fantasies as necessary conditions to get turned on indicate the level of dissociation from the sexual organs. And finally vulnerability is the essential condition to reclaim sexual power. I have found that this is problably the most difficult quality to find in men, particularly in intimate relationships. Although they might be great adepts of sexual and spiritual disciplines they may precisely have used these practices as a way of reinforcing their more refined egoistic sense of power and the denial of their emotional body. In my work as a sacred initiatress I create a safe an intimate space to allow for healing to happen.