You may not have to look for a drug dealer or buy your drugs off the street but the way you describe your use you indeed may be addicted. At the very least, you are making lifestyle choices that may someday lead you to that drug dealer or street drug. I have several causes for concern. Your health problems from the caesareans to the tubule pregnancy may have started you on this road as you found the drugs prescribed to you took away the pain. Add to this the treatment for depression, a sense of boredom that can be an offshoot of the depression, and losing a child due to SIDS all suggest ongoing grief and loss issues that you have not resolved.
Withdrawal symptoms can include being irritable, depressed, more easily angered, etc.
Or do you need to use more now than you did in the past to get the same or desired effect. If you can say YES to four of the seven according to the DSM-IV you are dependent. You are making choices about your lifestyle that may have a great impact over the next few years. You are only 29 years old and it would be much easier to begin to make different choices now than when you have lost your marriage and other support systems. Under the influence, whether you are addicted or not, you can cause an accident were you and your daughter get hurt or worse.