If you are convinced that you are better off dead, you may be able to help survivors who have lost some one to suicide. You may be able to tell them something that would ease their suffering. You may want to volunteer as a subject for cancer therapy medications. Check the link to organizations seeking healthy people to participate in ongoing research. Volunteer Summer Camp for Kids with Cancer Volunteer for Research 5.
Some people find they get great relief from self mutilation, instead of seeking death.
You may want to see what these people have to say at links below. What is Self Harm Self Mutilation, an account Piercing,Tattoos,Scarification,etc About Chem Dependency More Links 6. Another interesting link is Vampire, where the theme is death, but the author seems to be having lots of fun. Take a look. Vampire Fun 7.