Jesus told his disciples that they would face the same suffering and sacrifice he would make by going to the cross. For Jesus the cross was not shame but glory, not defeat but victory. Jesus offered his disciples not ease and peace but glory and victory over sin and death. Jesus asked nothing of others that he would not do himself. He showed the way of perfect love, the willingness to sacrifice one's life for another.
True love is sacrificial.
It holds nothing back from one's beloved. Jesus gave himself for our sake and for our redemption. His obedience and death on the cross obtain for us freedom and new life in the Holy Spirit. His cross frees us from the tyranny of sin and death and shows us the way of perfect love. There is a great paradox here.