Frankly, an old person who is incontinent does not deserve any less respect than a baby who is not yet potty trained. We need to show respect for those who have lived long on the face of this earth. If we do, when we get in that condition, people will be more likely to show respect for us. Learn to love older people. Anyone can love the young and beautiful, particularly when the hormones flow.
Young love does exist but it is often confused with passion.
To love an older person comes closer to true love. Of course, it is a pleasure to deal with an old person who is sweet, lovely, intelligent, and self-sufficient. Anyone can do that. It takes real character to love those who don't love us, and especially to love those who aren't lovable. So, if the person you are dealing with is an impossible old man or old woman, rise to the occasion and be challenged to treat them especially well.