Fright is something one can never get over. A warrior cannot indulge,thus he cannot die of fright. Your difficulty is that you want to understand everything, and that is not possible. If you insist on understanding you're not considering your entire lot as a human being. Your stumbling block is intact.
Understanding is only a very small affair,yet sober understanding is vital.
You think about yourself too much and that gives you a strange fatigue that makes you shut off the world around you and cling to your arguments. A light and amenable disposition is needed in order to withstand the impact and the strangeness of the knowledge I am teaching you. Feeling important makes one heavy,clumsy,and vain. To be a man of knowledge one needs to be light and fluid. Once you decide something put all your petty fears away.