We were told that indeed it was. In that fleeting moment of realization, the reality of him came to me as an epiphany. This is my son. So beautiful in every way, so perfect. I quickly got over my guilt as I immersed myself in an all-encompassing love for Baby Caden, not to mention recovering from childbirth, dealing with sibling rivalry, and the raw effort required to care for home and family.
Some people say that guilt is a useless emotion.
It seems to me that guilt is a fairly good indicator that one has screwed up and should make amends. No, not for Caden. From the instant I laid eyes on him, I could not help but convey how lovesick I was with my little prince. By wasting months obsessing over what turned out to be unimportant when I could have been enjoying the special closeness of pregnancy with my son, I was the only person really damaged by my former prejudice. I'm thankful Caden came along when he did, especially given how much I obviously needed to learn some of the things that only he could teach me.