In business I would not defer and I would not act based on my gender. But I did not want to be labeled an aggressive woman. Oftentimes it hurt my feelings and went against my heart. I am both, and proud to be so . Successful people are aggressive and assertive.
Success requires it.
Gender-bias denies it and turns it into a false handicap. Don't get caught in that trap. Most all the women who responded mentioned courtesy, tact, manners and cooperation in the mix. This is a well-balanced tool kit. In business, every woman should feel safe, not judged, for being aggressive or assertive, which is truly to be both.