Bill was able so see the love in his family's eyes while his boss glared at him. This made it easier to stay cool and respond to the boss in a professional manner, saving Bill from emotional agitation in the face of the angry outbursts. Bill learned to overlook the tirades and tune in only on the useful content of his boss's statements. Bills found a quiet, useful assertive equanimity that was based on self confidence and an understanding that the boss was the one who had the problem, not him. Bill had learned how to be a survivor.
Some people have one personality on the job and another outside the workplace.
It's important to be yourself all the time because it makes life much simpler. Some people feel better at work than any place else. At least that's one part of their life where they are in control. The person becomes the job and the job becomes the person. If you are consumed by your job, use the self awareness and self talk techniques to control stress, alexithymia, and stay connected to your feelings.