The time it takes from separation to settlement depends on the actions of the spouses. Divorce is not a game, but if one plays it as though it were, one should prepare to go the extra rounds. This usually occurs when one spouse is not in favor of the divorce or the impending outcome of such. It is an act of postponment and usually provokes the other spouse into playing games as well. A mature spouse will recognize this and keep very much to themselves.
Women are worried about securing custody and maintaining financial stability.
Financial stability will lead to a higher self-esteem, which can make the healing process much faster and easier. Men are primarily worried about losing assets, which can decrease their self- esteem, and thus make the healing process slower and more difficult. Parents have a tendency to hide emotions of regret and anger, because they do not want their children to see them in this type of emotional state. While this idea is very noble, keeping emotions bottled up inside only lets them fester and grow. Many experts feel that this should be the very first thing that spouses do, but in reality, this does not happen very often.