But infidelity is a clue that something is amiss in the marriage. Marital conflict may be the triggering event for one or both spouses to get involved with other people. After all, a lot of people unhappily married do not have affairs. Usually, therapists say, it is a combination of factors that culminate in an affair. For many couples that decide to stay together after an affair, restoring trust is a key issue.
Therapists point out that honest and open communication is a place to start.
That may mean learning new skills and changing expectations of what a marriage can realistically provide to both spouses. Physical attractions are normal. But we go about it . . . Start talking now. Start from day one of the marriage.