A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts. Some girls think swimsuits are indecent. Others have good figures. Drama in her opinion is knowing how to fill a sweater. A dress that makes a girl look slim often makes others look 'round.
True love means sleeping in the wet spot.
A woman drove me to drink. I never properly thanked her. Marriage is the only war where you sleep with the enemy. Virginity is curable if caught early enough. Taking your wife to Paris is like taking a sandwich to a banquet.