Verbal abuse is hurtful. Especially when it's denied. Verbal abuse is manipulative and controlling. Verbal abuse is unpredictable. No matter how intelligent, careful, or perceptive you are, she'll always find a way to hit a blind spot you didn't even know you had.
Verbal abuse is the issue in the relationship.
In normal relationships, arguments are over concrete things that can be resolved. In a verbally abusive one, there is no specific conflict - the whole point of any argument is to make you suffer. Verbal abuse expresses a double message. Verbal abuse usually escalates, increasing in intensity, frequency, and variety. Not just for ultra-sensitive men.