But the driving force is not just when we are procreating or conceiving. And it's not as simple as maybe I'll get laid tomorrow. It's a yearning, a searching for something other than the self. This idea is not as New Age as it sounds. Bright is not preaching the seven simple steps to transcendence and a better sex life.
Sex can be dull.
Sometimes the mechanics can be a disappointment. When that happens, when sex fails to live up to our expectations, Bright says, we tend to blame ourselves, to feel inadequate as lovers. One way to move beyond these feelings of inadequacy is to understand the ways in which sexual expression is part of all aspects of our lives, that eroticism is at the center of all our experiences, and that absolutely everyone is sexual. It's not an elite ethereal idea. Both are the same.