But many families are crowding so many activities into each day that there is often little time left that's not accounted for. For that, experts say, both the family and society as a whole have paid a price that is getting higher with every flip of the calendar. In most cases, a busy calendar is the enemy of strong relationships. The detriment to the children, and to society as a whole, is that this lifestyle treats activity as being more important than relationships. Still, Banks said, some families cope better than others.
Some families thrive on such heightened activity levels and stimulation.
For some this may be 'eu-stress,' meaning good stress. The key to much of the problem is that much of the pressure families place on themselves is self-imposed, says Carrie Carlson, licensed marriage and family therapist in the counseling ministry for First Baptist Church in Jackson. Some families cope well by choosing to do so, while others are swept along with the current dictating their direction. Instead, Carlson recommends evaluating each child's limit for extracurricular activities, determining what level of activity he or she can handle and honestly asking if the lessons, sports and other events are really for the good of the child or for the esteem of the parent. The price we may pay is the loss of quality family time, where families sit down to meals together, talk together, really get to know each other, and nourish our emotional and spiritual beings.