But the truth is never simple. Red Hat stock options loomed large. Our motives are always mixed. We can describe what we see at the level of the individual programmer or at the level of the code. When we lose ourselves in life in all its wonderfulness and flowing, we find ourselves, but when we try to hold on to what we find, we lose it again.
Victory comes only in moments of surrender.
We flicker back and forth between these two ways of being like holographic images. Wanting to quietly eat our cake and wanting to quietly have it too. We become suddenly fearful and reach out into the empty air to regain control. But there's no there there. Look at the rocks in the rapids, says a friend who loves to kayak, and you'll hit the rocks.