Give me a focking break. Sorry to hear it. No shit, just a lot of chewed up shoes. Sorry to hear it. So in walks my owner's wife and the next thing I know, she's taking off all her clothes right there in front of me, I kid you not.
Terrier swallows hard and asks what happened next.
Well sir, this goes on for like a half-hour. All the time she's looking over at me, eyes all wild like a rabbit's just before you get it cornered in the garage, saying, 'Good boy, you're such a good boy, I love you,' over and over. And I'm just laying there, eyeing her up and down, chewing on my Garfield squeakie, harder and harder 'til it's ready to burst wide open. She gets up, sashays over to the bathroom, turns around to give me one last look, and goes inside. I want to follow her real bad.