Very few abusers are always violent and angry. If you are dating an abusive person, it is probably because he can sometimes be loving and fun. Often, after an abuser hurts you, he will apologize and promise to never do it again. He may be especially sweet, convincing you to give the relationship another chance. This phase will not last.
Tensions build, and most abusers become violent again.
Experts call this the cycle of violence. If you think your abuser is the exception to this rule, you are probably wrong.