If a separation or divorce is what you want, it still represents a considerable loss and huge change in your life. Getting over it can take a long time. Some people feel they can begin to make a fresh start within a few months, but for many it can take two years or more before they are really able to leave the past behind and think about making a new life for themselves. There are four typical reactions after a break up.
Some people focus all their attention on thinking only about their ex's faults.
Others blame themselves entirely, even if it was the partner who was unfaithful or left them. Some try to put the whole thing out of their mind. The fourth, more healthy reaction, is to try to understand what went wrong so you can either repair the relationship or part with as little conflict as possible. Don't deny your feelings. It might help to keep a journal, writing down how you feel day by day Look after yourself.