This is no story of triumph. Although I have many friends, I am so very alone in here. I am out of touch with everybody in an area of society that everyone else takes casually or enjoys tremendously. I cannot even say the word sex. The concept is forever tainted in my mind.
Sex is dirty, ugly, awkward, scary, humiliating, disgusting, and shameful.
I hate sex. I get the feeling every once in a while that I will never be happy. The rest of the time I am just numb. My biggest fear now is that I will end up just like my father. I hate him more than anything for what he has done to me, for what he s taken from me, and for what he s turned me into.