Everybody knows it. You've Joined a Cheap HMO 33. Staff physicians include Dr. Who, Dr. Kevorkian, and Dr. Demento. Annual breast exam conducted at Hooters. You swear you saw salad tongs and a crab fork on the instrument tray just before the anesthesia kicked in.
Tight budget prevents acquisition of separate rectal thermometers.
Tongue depressers taste faintly of Fudgesicle. Even though your Primary Care Physician schedules patient appointments every thirty seconds, she still has to drive a cab nights and weekends to make ends meet. Exam room has a tip jar. Their company logo features a hand squeezing a bleeding turnip. You ask for Viagra.