You'll only find out if he can ever find peace after some time has passed. Even if you don't want him back, it might help him if you stayed in touch. I would rather have them tell me that its over and that it. My ex said she wanted me to still call and email her. ET People tell you they want to be friends to be polite.
Some people mean it when they say it, others say it because they feel as if it softens the blow.
I have a secret crush on someone at work. ET Invite him out. Yes, I have. I've also seen people in close-by relationships cheat on each other like mad. It depends on the people involved, and while distance may make cheating more attractive and easier to get away with, if your lover is trustworthy, you shouldn't have to worry.