Take turns talking. Stick to the topic. Do not bring in other sore issues. Keep coming back to the issue under discussion. Blaming, name calling, threatening, foul language and sarcasm decrease intimacy.
Young children believe what they hear their parents saying.
They are devastated when they overhear these forms of verbal abuse. These ways of communicating cut down on the possibility of your getting what you want out of the argument. Take out blame statements and name calling. No problem is ever solved by telling the other person how bad they are. Name calling causes the person to revert back to their behavior and feelings they had as a little child when their parents scolded them.