The higher a golfers handicap, the more qualified he deems himself as an instructor. Every par-three hole in the world has a secret desire to humiliate golfers. The shorter the hole, the greater its desire. Topping a 3-iron is the most painful torture known to man. Palm trees eat golf balls.
Sand is alive.
Golf carts always run out of juice at the farthest point from the clubhouse. A golfer hitting into your group will always be bigger than anyone in your group. Likewise, a group you accidentally hit into will consist of a football player, a professional wrestler, a convicted murderer and an agent or some similar combination. All 3-woods are demon possessed. A severe slice is a thing of awesome power and beauty.