In this instance, a major rental car agency had been successfully sued by a competitor for a false claim it had made on 354 penises. Dismissing the company's argument that the blame for the penile typos lay with a drunken tattooist, a federal court thereupon ruled that the models must either submit to castration, agree to have their penises sutured into permanent leather sheaths, or relocate to a Third World country where no one would understand the tattoos sewn into their members. Organized crime's involvement was suspected. This horrifying incident so shocked the public that legislation was passed barring any company or individual from using human genitalia to advertise products. After a disastrous feud with animal protection societies involving tattoos sewn into the nether regions of various chimpanzees, ostriches, and camels, the agency went out of business.
Tattoos continue to play an important role in society today.
State courts have ruled that leases tattooed onto tenants' chests are legally binding, and a federal court has ruled that a journalist who tattoos his notes onto his body can be required to undress in court so the jury may inspect all pertinent evidence. However, it is highly unlikely that any of us will live to see a tattooed Pope, a tattooed First Lady, or a tattooed protozoan, proving that things aren't getting nearly as far out of control as some people would have us believe. A Cynic's Shortlived Search for Sainthood Add a comment to the Expresso Tilt Guestbook or view the guestbook.