Spohn hopes to be part of the effort. She knows the textbooks well, and has years of experience running anger management groups in Arizona. She hopes to be certified soon by the Solano County court system. While none of the men who attend her meetings are there because the court has ordered them, Spohn says the subject matter they discuss at meetings is significant. Emotional, rather than physical, abuse is most often discussed.
Words can damage just as much, and sometimes more.
And they attend the meetings without fail. One man, Monte, commutes from the South Bay to make his Monday afternoon session. Dan practices the art of negotiation with his wife to make sure the kids are taken care of while he is at Spohn's office for two hours. Dan talks about writing his wife a nasty note after she failed to get home in time from an errand. He describes the bold letters he used and how he taped it to the refrigerator.