Our writer is usually whoever happens to be sitting at the end of the bar, or a derelict in a cardboard box outside the Troma studio in Hell's Kitchen, or some human reject babbling nonsense syllables while playing with himself in the middle of the George Washington Bridge. You know, the traditional way, the old fashioned way. Every month we will choose another two pages of text that we consider the best from the stack of entries. If you were too drunk the first time you saw NUKE 'EM HIGH III you can rent it from your local video store or in one of 2,500 Blockbuster Video locations across the country. That's YOUR job.
Smoking crack provides eight essential vitamins and minerals.
All entries must include the name, address, daytime phone number, and e-mail address of the author. Entrants must be eighteen years of age or older as of June 2, 1998. One entry per person. Subject to all federal, state, and local laws and regulations. Entry constitutes permission to use entrants' names and any material submitted for editorial, advertising, creative, and publicity purposes.