It sounds like everything you do with your partner leading up to the grand finale, intercourse. I'd rather think of it as love play instead. Once you consider the activities to be part of love play, then you realize both partners can engage in some fun stuff that's pleasurable in and of itself. Both partners do need time to get fully aroused, based on the human sexual response cycle. For young men, the time is negligible.
Sex begins in the brain.
Start thinking about your lovemaking hours in advance. Share your thoughts graphically with your lover if you can. Sexy e-mails, quick phone calls, and poignant notes up the erotic ante. Pay attention to romantic details. Begin by kissing and caressing each other's bodies everywhere except the genitals.