If we do not feel like a part of the dance community or our connection is tenuous, we may feel ashamed, defensive or as if there is something seriously flawed in us. We see power as residing outside of the self and it leaves us vulnerable and weakened. For women socialized to inhibit healthy expression of anger, we may turn the anger towards ourselves. As a result of feeling powerless over our environments, we may try to justify our lack of success or withdraw. We may just work harder and harder, feeling ourselves marginalized or not quite belonging.
Some dancers become self-destructive through drugs, alcohol and sexually acting out.
Significant others reinforce this model for success. For dancers just scraping by to satisfy basic needs, this is even more complicated. For the majority of dancers, not having earning power in a capitalist society translates into feeling bad about ourselves, even if we feel moderately successful as dancers and are validated by the dance community. Most of us have been taught to use our dance work and affiliations to define ourselves, know how we feel about ourselves, describe our successes, feel like we belong, and ultimately to justify our value in the world. Not to mention that the dance environment exists within a larger culture which invalidates it.