Non-smoking ban suddenly lifted, as all crew personnel lights up simultaneously. Head stewardess returns from the cockpit pale and nervous, and somehow you just know it wasn't because she was just groped by the co-pilot. Long line forming into the back of the plane, where that new experimental escape pod is kept. You're led down below to the baggage hold, where you are asked to squeeze on a steel braided line shooting out hydraulic fluid. Harrison Ford is seated in first class, and is asked by the pilot to take command of the aircraft.
Stewardess asks over the P.A. if there are any doctors aboard.
They are promptly moved into first class, and given comfy-looking pillows. Two stewardesses get into cat-fight over who will hold on to last remaining fire extinguisher. Playing Santa at the Center for Bladder Control. Operating a band saw after drinking a 12-pack of beer. Licking red-hot projector bulbs.