Three blondes meet a fairy and are granted one wish each. When God made man she was only practising. When God made the patriarchate she was drunk. Widows are not the only people who have late husbands. For every guy who marries for money, there is a gal who marries for alimony.
Some men marry poor girls to settle down, and others marry rich ones to settle up.
The trouble for a man with being best man at a wedding is that he gets no chance to prove it. The difference between a husband and a lover is the difference between day and night. There is only one beautiful boy in the world, and every mother has one. So they won't be total pricks. So when your done with them they can leave.