Crumble white sandwich cookies in small batches in blender. They tend to stick, so scrape often. Line a clean, new kitty litter box with saran wrap or waxed paper. Put cake mixture into the litter box. Put three unwrapped tootsie rolls in a microwave safe dish and heat 10 seconds, or until soft and pliable.
Shape ends so they are no longer blunt, curving slightly to look like the real thing.
Repeat with three more tootsie rolls and bury in mixture in the litter box. Mix remaining green and white cookie crumbs together , and sprinkle over the top of cake. Don't tell anyone that this is a dessert, just pick up and scoop out a serving for yourself and others as they watch in horror. If you can get away with placing this in a conspicuous spot, even better. Prepare cake mixes per package directions.