The only way to have good self-esteem is to be the best you are capable of being. Parents need to balance their treatment of their children. Teens are in training for the real world. If you praise poor behavior, you will get poor behavior. However, you cannot simply ignore behavior you don't like.
Teens are fully capable of manipulation.
If you aren't going to correct bad behavior, they will either assume you approve of or accept it, or they will decide they can get away with murder-and so they will. People like rules and guidelines. Spencer W. Kimball often told the story of the cows in his pasture, who loved to stand at the edge of the field and look longingly out. One day the fence came down, but the cows still went to the exact spot where the fence had once stood and stayed there. They needed the security the limits had given them.