Sometimes it's difficult to recognize a verbal attack. A person can be smiling, calling you sweetheart, honey and darling and still be verbally abusing to you. According to linguist Suzette Hadin Elgin, Ph.d, verbal hostility has a characteristic melody in which many words are emphatically stressed. According to cultural anthropologist Jennifer James, Ph.d, you can recognize that you've been attacked by a queasy feeling in your stomach or a depressed feeling after a conversation.
Snipers throw verbal attacks in several ways.
One of the most common weapons is constructive criticism. This is when insulting comments come disguised as helpful suggestions. I'm only telling you this for your own good. You're supposed to admire the person for being honest, while you're emotionally bleeding all over the place. Jennifer James calls criticisms passed down through generations, heirlooms.