But researchers have found certain common threads. HIV can have a more positive impact in relationships when it causes people to maintain a focus on what is most important in life. HIV can also cause partners to live in the present moment - not because there is no future, but because the future is uncertain. Of course, the future is uncertain for all people, but Gay men and others living with HIV have a more difficult time maintaining the illusion that they know what lies ahead. Sex is perhaps the area of intimate relationships that is impacted by HIV most directly.
Some couples find that they avoid topics which emphasize their differentness from one another.
Talking about things like retirement, aging or even changing jobs may feel difficult for the HIV negative partner. While new medical treatments have certainly made life with HIV better, they can also cause new stresses for the couple. The regimens are complicated in themselves. Side effects are often nasty. Treatments affect sexual desire differently, and usually not for the better.