The child gender differentiates, and they identify with the parent of the same sex. Simultaneously, they try to relate with the opposite sex. They need to face new challenges, frustrations, limitations. Although as I said they see on the level of their peers, they continue to seek parental support. The development of ethical values will enhance their self esteem.
Self esteem is a puzzle.
Many of us suffer extensive losses and we have been able not only to survive, but also to maintain our self esteem and to make appropriate decisions. Others although with apparent happiness and success, feel empty, poor about themselves. Money, beauty or health is not a guarantee for self esteem. The capacity for the child to feel good about himself will start with the first relationship he has with his parents, their acceptance for what the child is, not what they dreamed for him or her to be. With the discovery by the child of their own capacities to master and to feel competent about himself, comes the ability to separate from his or her parents, because they feel confident about their parents love.