I believe that black men, and all men for that matter, do have a responsibility. A responsibility to their own feelings of who they are attracted to, and a responsibility to be true to themselves and love who they love without regard to color. Black men are not the only people who have come from poor beginnings to accomplish great things. Personally, as I was growing up, my mother divorced 3 different times, but I didn't have the luxury of blaming the color of my step-father's skin for the instability and pain it caused in our family unit. We did, however, blame our father's infidelity, etc.
White women have substance just like anyone else.
We cannot be held responsible for who we are attracted to. That is the only true way to be able to fall in love with someone who you are truly attracted to. You are not responsible for making your partner happy. Your partner is not responsible for making you happy. That is a heavy burden to put on someone and it doesn't work for healthy relationships.