Often, Lloyd noted, spouses fail to report abuse because they're economically dependent on their mates. The abuser may insist that they only have one car. The victim may not have a checkbook or any credit cards in her own name, and so she is very dependent on him for financial survival. In 1995, Congress set up a program to help military spouses caught in this bind. The program provides the victim health and dental benefits and compensation based on the service member's pay for up to 36 months.
Transitional compensation ends if the couple reunites.
If the spouse merely decides to separate or divorce, and the service member has not been separated from the service due to abuse, they're not eligible for transitional compensation. Family advocates play an important role in helping victims understand their options, Lloyd said. Often victims hesitate to leave or press charges because they want to believe the abuser will change. Advocates help victims recognize from an emotional standpoint that their relationship with the abuser is over, and that going on with it puts their lives at risk. If he's carried out previous threats, it's a reasonable judgment not to leave at that point because he may very well try to kill you.