Helping is carrying out God's design for us. Helping does have its costs. Could be a few minutes to send a note. May be a little longer to check on a stranded traveler. Selfing would be circling the wagons or treating life as a rear guard action.
True help looks for no return.
Helping is an attitude that precedes us like a wave. It colors others' opinions of us even before we speak. It is placing our own agenda on hold, while directing our attention to the one lacking. The best helping, shhh, it's done in secret.