I m no fun to be around, with mood swings and thoughts that others don t want to think about, and now seizures. Or love, or sex, or affection. The fact that some people in remote areas of the world care about me is baffling. Bad enough that you void yourself. I care about these things because it s people I know who will be among the first on scene with my body.
Suicidal patients are low priority.
Lots of people are depressed. It s the people with psychosis, mania, dementia, those who are truly unable to function who get the hotly contested beds. I am not out of control. I just want to die. Another diarist, Gingko, shot herself this past Halloween.