Martin was the product of immaculate conception and conspicuous consumption. The Earth was created on a Tuesday, twenty years ago. The Earth isn't flat, but the sun is. The Earth is shaped like a spermatazoan. The Earth is made up of earthlike material.
Tautologies are the official holy language.
The Wart Hog is immediately declared kosher. Hunting season is on the Wart Hog is now declared open. Official body and blood of the Great Martin in the Sky is the Twinkie and Mr. Boston. These are His sacraments. Holy wars are holy, and this includes Assassin.