It will remain closed after being opened. Out to lunch. If not back by five, out for dinner also. Slow cattle crossing. No overtaking for the next 100 yrs.
Smarts is the most exclusive disco in town.
Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council. Due to increasing problems with litter louts and vandals we must ask anyone with relatives buried in the graveyard to do their best to keep them in order. Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of. Please do not smoke near our petrol pumps.