Well, if holding back a pack on that Daytona track and making sure his son and Michael Waltrip didn't get plowed into doesn't constitute a hero of sorts, I don't know what does. And to top it off, it cost him his life. Every driver on the track bumps and nudges every chance they get.
Some techniques are different, depending on the driver.
On the race track you're in one world, and off the track you're in another. You have to do what you have to do to win that race, short of deliberately killing someone - and Dale never killed anyone. As far as off the track, it's hard to believe that Dale drove the way you said his friend was quoted as saying. His wife Theresa, and his children meant the world to him, as did DEI and racing. There is absolutely no way he would race up and down the highways, with or without his loved ones in the car.