I remembered the location of European toilets. I drank less beer. For all my careful planning, of course, I ended up with more practical experience than I wanted. With much persuas ion, the waitress was convinced to let us into the staff toilets. And of course, they were all Asian toilets.
Skirts can be far more practical than trousers.
I was wearing trousers. My knees survived. My trousers survived intact. Somehow, I don't think this is a story to dine out on. It'll have to join the French unisex toilet story, and Dina's story of painted outlines of feet around a hole in the desert, in the scatological category.