Don't negate a person's attitudes, beliefs and values. Realize that those beliefs are unlikely to change unless the person really wants to change. For best results accept a person as they are. Seek to understand before being understood. It feels good to be understood.
Someone has to initiate the process.
Listen, understand, provide feedback, really get to know the other person. A person who seeks to understand others is wise. Understand that people perform for their own reasons not yours. People cannot motivate other people, they can create an environment where others motivate themselves . When asking someone for something, think about what's in it for them.