When you see those qualities in other people, you may be threatened by them. You're afraid to be close to women. Because it's not masculine to be close to women. The last time you were close to a woman, you were a child. Men may feel just disempowered by intimacy, by being close to a woman, and also by feeling the tender feelings that they're ashamed of.
Society definitely encourages and condones men's violence toward women.
Not as much as it used to be when it was less visible, and there were still laws on the books that made it alright for men to beat their wives, as long as it was within certain limits, and women were chattel. During the first suffragist wave in this nation, women were possessions, like a table or a chair. So violence toward them was quite condoned. The attitude has diminished, but it's still there. It starts with the slippery slope of the supposition that gender that sexual relations between men and women are dominant passive.