We split up five months ago. I also feel that my kids should be given more time to adjust to the new situation. Gayle Peterson Gayle Peterson, MSSW, PhD is a family therapist specializing in prenatal and family development. You are absolutely right to want to go slowly into a new relationship with your children. It is best to keep your new relationship separate from your children while they are engrossed in sorting out the loss or changes in the role their biological father plays in their lives.
Statistics show that half of all remarriages end in divorce.
Partly because children are expected to move too quickly into a new stepfamily following the loss of their first family situation. Stay true to your instincts. Children need to mourn the loss of one family dissolution, before being forced into another. Precipitous timing will backfire. Your children's remarks are clear evidence that their loyalty issues are being stimulated.