Hoist on Freud's patriarchal petard, men are caught between their need for intimacy and approval, and their fear of loss of control. Some responded by retreating from engagement with woman, others like Chris, attempt to take full charge. There is a type of sexual partner who is not convinced of her own attractiveness. It's about her power of sexual allure and her need for reassurance. I only ever fake it for women I like, who respond positively and grow to achieve a sense of their own prowess.
Some women think themselves incapable of exciting strong passions by their physical presence.
Sometimes pretending to come gives me a sense of supporting my partner and sometimes it brings a boring situation to a close. Josh acknowledged his irritation at what he saw as an unreasonable demand on his sexual performance and retaliated by pretending to ejaculate. He stumbled on this neat solution to his sexual dilemma almost by accident, finding it a useful way to end a frightening, difficult or tedious experience. He had neither the courage to inform his partner about his anxieties and feelings, nor the language to negotiate an alternative to penetrative sex. In spite of this, he refused to admit that he was faking his orgasms to maintain his sexual pride.