The shadow is all those parts of ourselves we have split off, repressed or denied. One of the secrets of growth here, is to look at what attracts or repels you from this person and realize that these qualities are in you. It simply shows a part of your personality, but we are multi-faceted beings. We all have free will, and should not be limited by what others say or do, or because of something that we have read. One of the secrets of growth is to embrace the opposite of your strengths.
Understanding opposites is an important part of the experience of wholeness and growth.
Then, when feeling taken advantage of, he might want to be tough and have trouble knowing when and how to be gentle, patient, forgiving. If Jack was in touch with opposing qualities in himself then he could choose, intuitively, just the right combination of qualities that are called for in any particular situation. Perhaps, he has had bad situations in the past, but it is critical that he recognize his own strength, and utilize it to his advantage. I am not suggesting violence, just the power of presence . His LJN is about power and strength, and not timidity.