When continuing the sexual relationship is no longer satisfying, you have the right to end it and find new ways of relating to your spouse. You are not disloyal to your spouse when you consider your own needs. Alzheimer's creates special needs for the affected person and seriously compromises his or her ability to fulfill the obligations as a partner in marriage. This does not negate the rights of the caregiving spouse who now must adapt to the changing relationship and who must find acceptable ways of meeting his or her needs. To continue the task of caregiver, you must find sources of renewal for yourself.
Sexuality is an integral part of our personality.
The need for affection and to feel sexually attractive are needs which may be expressed on a physical, emotional, or spiritual plane. Some couples have been able to adjust to the losses created by Alzheimer's by creating new levels of intimacy, including a relationship of celibacy which is mutually satisfying to both partners. This is a very personal, complex process including many factors not within the couples control, such as personality changes created by dementia. Couples who have been able to maintain a physical relationship, report that this adds significantly to a sense of well-being for both the patient and the caregiver. Other caregivers, however, grieve for the companionship and emotional fulfillment which is no longer possible with a person whose condition precludes rational and emotional involvement.