My beginning could be more interesting. If I used a flashback, it needs a smoother transition into the narrative. Some events are out of order. Here and there, the narrative wanders off the main topic. I've used details, but I need more.
Some passages have voice, but others sound flat.
I need an ending that fits the narrative. I have some mistakes to correct. The beginning is dull. If I used a flashback, it isn't working. The sequence of events doesn't make sense.