I like the description of empathy as suspending our ego needs long enough to try to understand and to feel what it is the speaker wants to communicate. Empathy differs from sympathy in its end result. The sympathetic listener, like the empathic listener, starts out by demonstrating, verbally or non-verbally or both, the feelings of the speaker. But whereas the empathic listener focuses his or her feelings back on the speaker, the sympathetic listener ends up focusing on his or her own feelings. Empathy, then, suspends the listener's occupation with self.
Sympathy shifts the listener's occupation back to self.
This distinction is especially important for those handling customer service problems. Customers do not look for someone to handle their problems sympathetically. The mere sympathizer, often referred to as a bleeding heart, usually finds it emotionally difficult to handle another's problems efficiently and effectively. Customers want solutions not tears. She refers to empathy as a one-way street.