Relationships Department Please remember, this column is designed to help the consumer seeking behavioral-health information, and not intended to be any form of psychotherapy or a replacement for professional, individualized services. While he is aware that he has a problem, he does not realize how much he is putting our relationship in danger nor will he seek professional help. There are two issues here. First we have the issue of the lying and second we have the issue of getting someone to seek help.
Some people are pathological liars.
Most often the need to lie stems from low self-esteem and insecurity. Liars feel the need to protect themselves from any form of rebuke. They seek immediate relief from the anxiety generated by any question directed toward them. Thus, telling a lie becomes both a defense against the perceived attack and relief from the anxiety. I have known people who had to keep a written record of what they said to whom in order to keep track of their lies.