The fourth element is our new life, our changed life - again the person hearing your confession could chat with you about this. On this last visit my spiritual director brought up the affair I had had, even though he knew it had been confessed and absolved. He knew the answer was 'no' because of the way I had been responding to his opening up of the issue - so we prayed about it. Some issues are a bit like a broken leg - even once the plaster is off the leg still has to become strong again. Since the first time I made a personal confession to God before a priest and received Absolution the General Confession during the communion service has always been a lot more meaningful to me.
Prayer is a very useful way of dealing with sin.
Jesus told the disciples in the Garden of Gethsemane to watch and pray so that they wouldn't fall into temptation. After my husband's accident I was the one who told most of the women who had been in his life of his death. I wanted them to know before his name was published by the media. I ended up with much righteous resentment towards these women - perhaps a bit like that older brother in the story of the prodigal son. I was at a healing weekend run by Canon Jim Glennon.