The hurting does not get better, because we do not allow ourselves or the loved one who passed over to separate in the most natural way. Our negative thought pattern wants to rule not only the living, but also 'the dead'. You could also say your beloved was taken away too soon or too late. There is no such a thing as the wrong time. Every thing in the Universe happens exactly on time and in the right place, according to the Divine Plan.
Nothing is too slow, too fast or a coincidence.
When a loved one made the transition from this planet to another dimension, we must 'allow' the person to do it. We must help the person to make the transition peacefully, harmoniously, lovingly and with grace. Before you have done that, you stifle your own growth and that of the loved one. The loved one will be received joyfully on the other dimension, and will be in a position to give more love and help to you. By letting go, by knowing and accepting the process of learning and growth you WILL heal the inner self.