Raines sees a yearning for another way. His course, Death and Dying, has become the religion department's most popular offering. Studying the grief process is, for many of them, a first chance to contemplate their own losses. Traditional Judaism accepts that grief comes in stages and has rituals for each milestone. Islam gives special recognition to the close relatives of the deceased on each anniversary.
Secular society acts as if it has outgrown the signs and restraints that once marked the mourner.
I'm not suggesting a return to the days when mourning would have prevented Scarlett O'Hara from enjoying a dance. But what I've discovered since is that the lifelong fear of grief keeps us in a barren, isolated place and that only grieving can heal grief. All rights reserved. Any copying, redistribution, or retransmission of any of the contents of this service without the express written consent of Philadelphia Newspapers Inc. is expressly prohibited.