For you lay readers, that's when your gums recede and your teeth sensitize, causing the experience of pain to be felt. Well, to get to the bottom of this, I assembled a team of leading scientists, psychologists and theologians. We spent the better part of yesterday morning analyzing, experimenting and dialoguing with and about various toothbrushes. While the makers cite greater maneuverability as the benefit, we find the thumb grips to harbor countless bacteria within their recesses, exposing the user to needless contact. They should be eliminated.
Most bristles are polished and end-rounded to protect the enamel and gums.
Our findings indicate that not enough care, bordering on malicious intent, is given to the bristles. Not only do they inflict pain when horizontally stroked across the upper roof gums, but the liquified paste has a tendency to impede from the confines of the mouth cavity while brushing. Most makers brag about the length of their handles, citing the ability to reach and gain easy access to back teeth. Our findings are grounds for grave concern. Not only from the physical side, where the length inflicted injury to the tonsils and the back of the throat area occurs, but our theologians felt it to be high moral misconduct to highlight the length of a handle as a buying inducement.