His shame and anger created problems of their own, plummeting his grades and instigating playground fights. Once his mother sidestepped his defenses and began to understand the shame at the root of the problem, she came up with an ingenious solution. Together, mother and son created a T-shirt to wear to school. By shrugging off his shame, this child and his mother reached a new level of acceptance. They defused the problem, and helped the child get back to the business of growing up.
Strong emotions have a physical energy.
Its often important to defuse this energy before attempting to talk it through. Rather than wait for the anger to explode in some random, potentially destructive or aggressive means, plan ahead. Hit a pillow is a common outlet. If so, identify an anger pillow. Don't use the bed pillow.