It s difficult to do this when you are feeling disrespected and hurt by those whom you love and hold as special in your life. Parents who refuse to acknowledge the reality of a son or daughter s same-sex relationship may unintentionally force a confrontation at times such as family reunions, holidays and similar occasions. If a relationship with parents or siblings is to be healthy for a gay man or woman, it will need to be based upon mutual respect. If that respect is not present, we face difficult choices about what to do. It is not possible to maintain the comfortable fiction of a close-knit family when you are being asked to deny your primary relationship or the truth about your life.
Some families are so toxically rigid that they disown their gay kids.
This is very sad. Even if we learn to joke about it to try to minimize the pain, the hurt and anger are still there. Talking with friends about these feelings and issues can lessen the sense of isolation and shame that sometimes accompany them. If you need more help, consider seeing a psychotherapist. John R. Ballew, M.S., is a licensed professional counselor in private practice in Atlanta.