The most important thing to remember is that we have in our hands something which Hashem gave us to develop, to make into a worthy human being. The Torah does not want us to raise institutions. It wants us to raise people. The secret of raising people instead of institutions is unselfishness. The efforts involved are compensated with a lot of joy, but the joy is not the goal.
Many people think that everything in the world is to be enjoyed, even their children.
So they bribe the child to do what they want, so that they will be happy. They want to get a smile from the child, so they bring him another toy. What they want is to take from the child, and thus the child also learns to take. He looks for what he can get from the parents. If he is not satisfied with what they give him, then he looks elsewhere to get what he wants, and he often rebels.