However, we ask that you ensure that these relationships are consensual and that people want to receive your off-list mail. Most of the time, after non-BPs work through some of their pain and grief, they DO come to realize the part that THEY played in the relationship. And although they may be very angry with the BP, they can also care a great deal for the person. If they didn't, they wouldn't be here. However, if you feel angry and blaming, we suggest trying to avoid making blanket negative statements about BPs or Nons that are unsupported by clinical literature.
People are extremely diverse.
If someone makes a generalization that you don't agree with, try not to take it personally. It is helpful for people with BPD to explain what it's like to live with the disorder. If you have BPD, remember that people posting will have feelings of isolation, depression, guilt, self-blame, anger, helplessness, and grief. These are common, normal feelings that people on the list will talk about. If you have BPD, it can be difficult to read about this.