To fuck up is computer. To annoy the shit out of you and fuck up at the same time is Microsoft. There are two types of people in this world. Always get an itemised receipt. Except from a prostitute.
Necessity is the mother of invention.
But the father is a condom made of cling film. John Bad Getting married for a joke is not funny. If a person has had a restraining order placed on them by the SPCA, they don't really love you. Luca Pompilio Shampoo doesn't taste as nice as it smells but sunscreen does. Don't pick up a child by the scruff of the neck.