Appreciate your own unselfish love. Do not fear the future. Seek instead to meet it with the same sensitivity and courage you have already shown. If your son returns to live with you, your vision of parenthood will be intact. Your vision of mothering may undergo a change but it will not alter your love and connection to your son.
Parenthood is sacrificial by nature.
This does not imply martyrdom, but it does mean that your job is to serve the best interests of your child to the best of your ability. This appears to have increased, rather than decreased the love and support available in your family. Accept the support your husband and other family members have to offer you through this time. Watch this if baby's meals end with thrown food. Learn about a potentially lifesaving new vaccine.