I followed the compulsion to write because I had to, because it wouldn't go away, even when it was chronically buried in apathy and depression. I considered myself a failed writer and even a fraud. I would go for long periods without writing anything. It was fear of writing, that disease of the heart that no medical doctor has diagnosed or even recognized. The disease may well be endemic everywhere, but we don't have the statistics or the studies to prove it.
People are out there self-medicating against it.
They're out there languishing in writing limbo. Experiencing periods of remission, then sliding into paralysis again. Many people with this affliction lead outwardly active lives. They may be writing books. They may even be published authors.