Older women have jobs with dental plans. Younger women can't help you when your teeth get knocked out playing hockey. She's using you. Older women take charge of the situation. An older woman will call you up and ask you for a date.
Older women know how to cook.
Young women know how to dial 967-1111. An older woman will introduce you to all of her girlfriends. Older women are psychic. You never have to confess to having an affair, because somehow they always know. Older women often own an interesting collection of lingerie that they have acquired from admirers over the years.