If something brought up memories or feelings for you, share this if you would like but do not comment on his or her experience in any way. Focus on your own experience. When both people have had a chance to give and receive attention, share what it was like to do this exercise. Places of discomfort indicate where your growth may begin if you decide to use the techniques in this book to create a regular space for exchanging support. In my classes, I find that most people are surprised to discover how thoroughly they have been trained not to be in these roles.
Some people find the previous exercise to be very moving.
Many of us have never had anybody pay such complete attention to us. Just being looked at in a loving way can be a powerful experience. Other people find the attention to be embarrassing or anxiety producing. Since it is likely that some feelings were stirred up, in the next chapter we'll discuss emotions and how to work with them.