Swain long ago stopped accepting volunteer applications. On this cold morning, some of the volunteers lucky enough to make the cut are heaving and grunting an oak plank the size of a porch column into position at the bow stem. The 130-pound timber has been baked limp in a steam box for two hours, and the men struggle within a cloud of vapor and frosty breath to pry and twist it into shape. They have about 15 minutes to clamp it into position with giant dog-bone clamps before the plasticized oak cools back to rigidity. It's more intellectual.
Nothing is square, nothing is straight.
And everything is massive, from the outsize tools to the colossal mass of the rising 52-ton hulk itself. It's a wondrous scene for wannabe carpenters, and even in the bitter cold envious men stand ogling at the yard gate. To those who watch handyman shows on PBS as a kind of soft porn, this is an irresistible live show. There's not a person here who couldn't be making a lot more money elsewhere. There was no good reason to expect this pipe dream to come true.