The bio-survival brain is shrewd and selective, managing to extricate raw pain from the memory bank and dissolve it in the interests of self preservation. Emotional hurt seems to have a resonance which only dissolves with the passage of time. Pain may be the vital sign of life but it must recede as we recover and resume a normal state. If you don't let it out, it rots inside. Nevertheless unburdening onto another person can be more than an act of expiation or simply a means of gaining comfort through sharing.
Self awareness is one thing, dependency is something else.
Soldiers who saw the most loathsome atrocities and, upon returning home, faced guilt or internal repercussions every bit as hard to endure. They couldn't share what they couldn't express. Revulsion by elements of the community who opposed their involvement in Vietnam added to their emotional tourniquet. We are so free that we tend to take freedom for granted. We don't remind ourselves our expectations are based on freedom of choice - part of which is an endless bombardment of superlatives and hysterical advertising which reinforces our need to choose the right product.