Most children have friends from divorced families that include stepparents and siblings who don't live with them. Understanding that there are many types of families will help reassure your child. The Weinsteins attend family picnics sponsored by Adoption Connection and get together with friends who have adopted children, including Shelly's sister. Such activities give adopted children the chance to make friends with other children just like themselves. By age seven or nine, children become aware that most parents keep their babies, and adopted children may feel angry or rejected that their birthparents gave them away.
Some children worry that they did something wrong to make their biological parents leave.
Reassure your child that this is not the case. Explain that adoption is an act of love and that your child's birthparents chose adoption because they wanted the best for their child. Let your child know that you love him or her and that he or she will always be an important part of your family. Two years ago, Julia and Don Hichen's daughter Annabelle asked to meet her birthmother, Kelly. Up until that point, the nine-year old had been content to exchange letters and pictures.