If you do something because your church has decided that something is bad, then it's cheap. If you come to the conclusion through your own searching and praying that you will not participate in actions because they are bad, and you avoid them, then that is holy because it brings honor and glory to God. To do justice. To love mercy and walk with God, that's holiness. There are moments when we are far from holy, but we must pattern ourselves after Christ.
Perfection is an ideal.
We didn't need Christ if we could meet that ideal. We'll always fall short. That's where the process of salvation comes in. I say process because salvation is more than a one time experience. It is the beginning of sanctification of the believer.