Often times they are not recognized as parents by others on these special days. Light a special candle or buy a special flower in memory of your child. Consider changing or adding a tradition to that day. If you always have your family over, make plans to go out for dinner. Take a day trip and plan a picnic.
Some people find it comforting to visit the child's grave.
Do something special for yourself. Treat yourself to a movie. Start reading a book you've always wanted to read. Family and friends may be confused and unsure of what to say or do for the bereaved parent on these days. Since it is often difficult to find an appropriate card, make a card for the parent letting them know that you remember they are still a mother or father to the child that has died.