By Archfiend The Lawyer is one of the unique animals that roam the North American continent like an elephant with diarea spewing offal for the rest of us to step in.
Some people believe that the lawyer is born like most people from a mother and father.
However, this is an urban legend. Lawyers are spontanteously spawned from any place where large amounts of dung is left in filthy piles. Some notorious breeding spots include the sewers of Los Angeles, the stables at the Kentucky Derby, and of Rosanne Barr's bathroom. Like most parasites, the lawyer sustains itself by feeding on any hapless victims it runs across. Young lawyers often take advantage of divorcees and accident victims, by siphoning money away from them for their own vile purposes.