We're actually connecting again. All the time, I thought our marriage was bad when all we needed was time for us. Even though nothing was inherently wrong between them, they had grown cool toward one another. And it seemed natural to blame their unhappy feelings on each other. And just like the little foxes that ruined the vineyard mentioned in the Song of Songs, the weariness of their daily routine robbed them of the joy of their relationship.
Nothing's left to give, so spouses end up snapping at each other.
Wright suggests that weary couples take note of their peak energy times and try to save those for couple time. That way, they can give each other their best energy and attention. When you feel you're at the end of your rope, remind yourself whose hand is holding the other end. Some friends of mine struggled with this tension. Dan and Tina both work during the day, but Dan also serves as his church's choir director.