Yet I give this power to others every time I weep when I should not. Everyone knows you shouldn't cry at work. You shouldn't cry in front of adversaries. You shouldn't cry all the time. Tears represent weakness.
Tears spell vulnerability.
I've been told that I should be grateful for this tendency, that I should embrace my crying fits as evidence of emotional candor and a warm nature. She is equally distraught. I can rest assured, she tells me, that no one will ever mistake me for a cold fish. But at work, in restaurants, at the family dinner table, my tears can horrify, infuriate, even intimidate the people I am close to or just happen to sit by. I think of it as a problem and try different devices, like thinking of recipes, to staunch the inevitable flow of tears.