You are excluded from almost every aspect of the investigation, conviction and sentencing. Most do not know what to say to you. Friends mean well, but often don't know what to say so resort to saying things that they think will make you better. The wisest friends, however, tell you that they don't know what to say and that they are there for you if you want to talk. God - You are sometimes very angry at God.
Murder is an earth-bound evil.
You will find a new normal. The only way that things can be normal again is for you to have your loved one back in the physical sense. The new normal is not as awful as the first few months following a murder, however, they are different and take some time to adjust to. First, when a murder happens, you spend your time not even believing it is true. You hear them, you see them, you want to see and hear them.