Nobody likes feeling like a phony.
But if you've never felt like one, perhaps you've haven't tried improving your behavior. It means that anytime you decide to improve yourself, the first few times you try the new behavior, you will feel like you're not being yourself. For example, you decide that you are no longer going to yell at the children. Instead, you are going to speak calmly and quietly. The next time they act up, you try the new behavior.