The Misunderstood Emotion, writes about the pattern becoming circular and occurring hundreds of times each day. The child's aggression is rewarded when the attacker withdraws and the child learns to use tactics such as whining, yelling and temper tantrums. When other family members also use these methods, the problems increase. When talking or even yelling went on and on, it often led to hitting. The problem is often, though not always, inept, inconsistent parenting.
Parents can learn how to nurture and discipline effectively.
Overly permissive parents who exercise too little power and use too little discipline can also learn to be authoritative parents. As is often the case, balance is important. Learn to deal with your own and others' anger. When parents discipline out of anger or with expectations that are inappropriate for the age of their child, they often make mistakes in the way they react. The place to begin is with ourselves.