Many Adult ADDers I know seem almost trapped in a perpetual mid-life crisis of some kind. More than others, they wonder if this really is all there is. They want to get so much more out of life, but aren't sure how to go about accomplishing it. Often they are defeated and discouraged to the point that they may think this is all they could have, all that they could handle. But they struggle with a restlessness and a drive for something more.
Most adults come up with some way of coping with the realities of life.
They learned how to either delay, defer or even to deny their own goals and aspirations for the greater goal of more immediate priorities, such as a family or a career. Most people come to terms with who they are and are able to be happy with those terms. To an ADDer, hope deferred most probably IS hope denied. He never learned the lessons of delay of gratification as a youngster. If he somehow did pick up on that concept, in some sort of abstract, theoretical way, his basic nature still makes it hard for him to apply it.