When explosions happen, they are incredibly intense. The ideal analogy to represent the family is the Holy Trinity - but that icon leads us to also believe that we are doomed from the beginning, because no one lives up to the ideal. The healthy family communicates and listens. In a healthy family, we recognize that everyone has a basic need to be heard. The healthy family affirms and supports.
Responsibility brings freedom, achievement brings support, loyalty brings commitment.
If we give our kids responsibility and they meet it, we have to trust them with more freedom to decide things. They must be loyal to their decisions - if someone wants to play the French horn, they have to do it right for three months, even if they quit after that. The healthy family teaches respect for others. The healthy family develops a sense of trust. Protection, safety, security for kids.