Four keepers have so far died at Aspinall's zoos because he insists on them entering cages to bond with the animals. But it is Aspinall's views on humans that have branded him as a true eccentric. On being told by Richard Nixon that a nuclear war could kill 200 million people, Aspinall responded that this was not enough. Aspinall believes the value of humans decreases as their numbers increase, which means that the life of one elephant is worth 1,000 humans. Abortion, infanticide, euthanasia and birth control are necessary, says the father of three.
Most mammals have built-in population control, only humans insist on reckless breeding.
The Express also reports that Aspinall now wants to enter politics, causing the alarmed wife of Britain's Home Secretary to reveal how Aspinall once claimed to have eaten human sausages in Morocco. Luckily he lost. Had Inkatha succeeded in seceeding the province he probably would not have had to bid. Unlike Bugsy Spiegel who invented Las Vegas, Aspinall failed to properly reinvent Zululand. Nevertheless, whilst Mandela and Mbeki were globe hopping, mouthing off about the African Renaissance and accepting kudos for their enlightened leadership, Buthelezi sent the storm troopers into Lesotho to take many lives and really show them who is boss on this sub-continent.