But the desire to fit in is still screaming to be met. If children or teenagers don't fit in and identify with their same-sex peers, they may be drawn toward unhealthy relationships that seem to hold out the promise of acceptance. While this is not uncommon for many children, events like these can plant additional seeds of doubt and confusion about one's sexual preference. Tragically, for many men and women, homosexual attractions are also rooted in haunting incidents of past sexual abuse. Sexual abuse involves any contact or interaction whereby an older, stronger, or more influential person uses a vulnerable child or adolescent for sexual stimulation.
Studies show that incidents of sexual abuse are prevalent in the childhoods of adult homosexuals.
20 Those who work with adult individuals seeking help for homosexual struggles repeatedly hear stories of boys having been sexually molested, usually by older boys or men. They regularly hear of girls having been sexually abused, typically by a close male family member, friend, or authority figure. As is the case with any of the factors mentioned, sexual abuse does not automatically produce homosexual attractions. But for some it can be a major part of a context in which homosexual attractions can form. The way the damage of sexual abuse affects the development of these attractions tends to be different for men and women.