Grief is paralyzing and impairs decision-making. Recognizing my pain as grief might have swayed me to postpone making a major decision, such as buying a house. This was a more significant decision for us than for other transferees because we'd never lived in a house before. Nor had we ever lived in a place that had winter. Which leads me to my next point.
Most people move because of the promise of a larger salary or lower cost of living.
Indeed, the Midwest is less costly than California. However, you still need a hefty financial cushion for surprises. For example, in October, just a few months after we moved in, our area was hit by a major snowstorm. Add the cost of snow tires, winter clothes and repairing frozen pipes and we were soon near the end of our savings. That's about what we paid for utilities during an entire winter in California.