Change your socks. Have another beer. I mean, if God knows what we are going to do tommorow then you cannot have the choice to do it. There has not been considerable controversy about several of the above listed alternatives to reading the First Section. Some people think they are not so silly.
Some people think they are offensive.
And some people just think that they are a waste of space. All of these may be true. However, we stand by them, as we firmly believe that they are all more interesting than the First Section. License to use this content for any purpose and without fee is hereby granted to anyone. This license is irrevocable.