The most important job in most offices is the Keeper of the Coffee Pot. This person makes the coffee, and then constantly checks on it to make more coffee, clean out the pots, stock up the cups, refill the sugar containers, and so on. In an office of at least 10 people, this can be a full-time job. However, if you are a new employee, the Keeper of the Coffee Pot will have already been chosen. Therefore you must either get that person promoted, fired, or kidnapped.
Many offices have lots of house plants, but no official house plant care company.
Take over caring for the plants. Again, this is a position usually occupied by a seasoned work avoider, so the position can only be taken by force. If you are in a smart office which doesn't allow coffee pots or house plants, doubtless there will be networked computers requiring a network manager. Every company has a newsletter, with important news about births and death among the employees and who has what for sale. Generally this is a job no one wants to do, which makes it perfect since it requires no skill and produces nothing of lasting value.