You, sir, are drunk. But you, madam, are ugly, and I shall be sober in the morning. Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted. Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel. An age is called Dark not because the light fails to shine, but because people refuse to see it.
Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.
Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory. All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher. Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.