But people who are HIV-positive, and the sexual partners of these individuals, must recognize that virtually all forms of direct sexual contact carry some risk of infection, however remote. And in the end it is up to both partners to negotiate the degree of risk that they are willing to assume in order to attain the degree of stimulation and gratification they need. Similarly, there is no evidence that the use of sex toys such as dildoes or butt-plugs poses a risk, unless the sex toy is shared by partners without first being properly disinfected. In that case, semen, blood, or vaginal juices from one partner may come into contact with the mouth, vagina, or anus of another, and HIV transmission is possible. Like fingers and hands, sex toys used roughly or without enough lubrication can damage the vaginal or anal linings, causing increased risk in later sex play.
Mutual masturbation is considered a safe sexual activity.
In practice, however, there have been no reported cases of HIV transmission attributed to mutual masturbation. Both partners must clearly understand the risks of various activities, must respect one another's limits, and must clearly communicate these limits. But people who are HIV-positive, and the sexual partners of these individuals, must recognize that there is a difference between minimal risk and no risk. Virtually all forms of direct sexual contact carry some risk of infection, however tiny, however remote. And in the end it is up to both partners to negotiate the degree of risk that they are willing to assume in order to attain the degree of stimulation and gratification they need.