Generally speaking men feel loved when they know they are respected and their sexual needs are met. Women feel loved through tenderness and understanding. Touching, holding, cuddling are important even though she may have little desire for sex. Fear of repeating the same excruciating pain of loss often makes a woman want to refrain from sex while in grief. Many women feel sex is wrong when their precious child has just died, whereas sex reassures men that they are loved, needed, and that their wife really cares about them.
Men usually relate first sexually, then verbally.
Sexual intimacy nurtures the husband's emotional needs. Both parents are very insecure, fragile and vulnerable after loss. Meeting your partner's need for love will bind you more closely together. Knowing someone loves you is a needed security blanket at such a time. It is a MUST that you reach out to each other to keep your marriage from falling shipwreck in the turbulence of loss.