It is sometimes frustrating for parents to go through the growth process with their children, not knowing how to be helpful and receiving messages that are unclear or incomplete. Students may add to the uncertainty by changing rapidly. As a parent, it can be difficult to know when to help, when to step back, and how worried to get. Usually a parent's best guideline is to provide a steady, supportive home base while recognizing that there will be ups and downs in students needs and expectations. Let them know that you respect their right to make a decision and that you will serve as an advisor when asked.
Most parents have a high investment in their student's decisions.
Problems arise, however, when parents are more invested in those decisions than students. It can be hard to lessen involvement in a student's decisions out of fear that the student won't assume responsibility. The irony is that students often don't step up to the task of being responsible until parents step back. After all, it's easier to ignore problems when someone else is worrying about it for them Taking a step back as a parent is uncomfortable, and at times frightening, because there is no guarantee that students will assume responsibility nor that they will make the same decision as you would. The fear that the student is not accepting responsibility in the interim makes most parents lose a lot of sleep.