I heard somewhere in some article that there are new ideas being pondered that rape isn't just violence against women. It's about time. I'm sorry for what happened to you, because you were still violated. It's not rape. If you resist, I'll kill your kid in the next room.
Rape usually involves a threat of danger.
What happened to you still sucks though. You didn't go into detail, and you may actually still be at risk for something worse to happen, especially if dude is still in your life. If he is, and you don't want him there, break all contact immediately. As Douglas writes, if he calls 40 times, and you talk to him the 41st, you've just told him that the price for talking to you is 41 phone calls. Anyhow, I don't really know what to say to you.