If people saw me washing without my makeup, they would laugh at me. I'm so dirty now that if I washed, the drain would clog. Cats, dogs, and chickens never wash, and they're perfectly happy. Prehistoric humans were happy all the time until the first soap salesman made them feel guilty. If I start washing again, my friends will think I am trying to conform to middle-class standards.
Washing is for women and children.
Washing is for people much dirtier than I am. I will wash when I find the bathroom that is exactly right for me. I only believe in things I can see, and I can't see bacteria. Children need to see that it is OK to be different. Washing may have been OK in my grandfather's day, but it's not practical in today's world.