Annoy motorists by not bothering to signal when you are turning left at a junction. Look across as you are turning to see the look of anger when they realise they didn't have to wait for you. Get your own back on cyclists by overtaking them and then immediately turning left, forcing them to brake quickly which will hopefully result in them flying over their handlebars into the road. TO delay paying your electric bill simply lock the electric-board man in the cupboard under the stairs whilst he reads the meter. TO prevent the soles of a brand-new pair of shoes becoming scratched, simply wear many plastic carrier bags over each shoe when outdoors.
NEXT summer save money on expensive sun-tan oils by using fish oil instead.
SAVE wear and tear on car door hinges by leaving your doors open all the time. The increased air resistance can be offset somewhat by winding down the windows. BY previously filling the cooling system of your car with coffee powder - one can stop driving at any time to partly drain the radiator for hot coffee. WHEN driving your car with no passengers - keep the car perfectly level by putting a sack of potatoes, of your body weight into the front passenger seat. Should anyone else use the car, they can add or remove the correct weight of potatoes before driving.