A main recommendation is that couples planning to marry be given vouchers to attend relationship education classes. Ms Simons says the bulk of pre-marriage education is done by mainstream religious denominations, even though 50 per cent of couples are married by civil religious celebrants. She says civil celebrants seem reluctant to refer couples to pre-marriage programs, possibly because so many courses are run by churches. However, she says, many secular organisations provide pre-marriage education, and even the programs run by churches have little to do with religion. Ms Simons says there is confusion between counselling and education.
People think that when they go to counselling they've got problems.
A senior counsellor at Relationships Australia, Ms Rosalie Pattenden, says people who don't go to church don't tend to attend pre-marriage courses. One reason a person might seek advice is because they want to avoid the divorce their parents had. The group sessions cover what has attracted a couple to each other, communication skills, how to resolve conflict, how to deal with differences in individual styles, family backgrounds and personalities, expectations and a relationship's strengths and weaknesses. The South Australian study found that 5 per cent of couples doing pre-marriage education either postpone or cancel their weddings and about a third identify issues on which they need further counselling, either before or after they marry. A Uniting Church minister, the Reverend Kim Cain, says his church's ministers tend to do their own pre-marriage counselling but sometimes refer to other agencies.