The judge will review the stipulation, and if complete and fair, will most likely sign it and make it part of the court order without a lengthy hearing. You may also choose to represent yourself and attempt to resolve the issues in your divorce without hiring a lawyer. You may choose to consult with a trained, neutral third party, called a mediator. A mediator will not tell the parties what the best settlement is. The mediator will guide the parties through the emotions and underlying issues of your conflict and help you reach an agreement satisfactory to each spouse.
Mediation is a good approach when there is dispute regarding the children.
Mediation may not be a good idea when one person has a substance abuse problem. The use of drugs and alcohol interferes with a person's ability to make commitments and live up to the conditions of the agreements. Mediation also may not be useful when there is a history of abuse and violence. When one spouse feels afraid or intimidated by the other, the spouse may feel pressure to reach agreement out of fear and anxiety rather than by choice. A good agreement is one which is entered into freely by each person without pressure and fear.