It can be very difficult for us to develop intimate and loving relationships if we grew up in a family in which intimacy was dangerous because of emotional, physical, or sexual abuse. The heart develops a strong armor to protect itself, but these defenses can also isolate us. The term opening your heart is used to describe a willingness to allow yourself to be open and vulnerable to another person. When children are abused by those who are supposed to nurture and protect them, it is not surprising that they have a more difficult time trusting others later in life. But it doesn t have to be that way.
Old wounds can begin to heal.
An intimate, loving relationship as an adult can offset many of the harmful effects of childhood adversity and parental deprivation. Whom you choose to be with in a relationship and how you relate to that person can either help overcome adverse childhood experiences or reinforce them. The willingness to feel vulnerable to open your heart is essential to real intimacy. We have a choice in each moment to keep our hearts open or closed, to live in love or in fear. Maintaining this awareness of choice is the most important factor in keeping an open heart.