Not the family. Not the care providers. If the patient is made comfortable, then the family can and should get the attention. But the symptoms of the patient must come first and must be controlled. If you choose hospice care, you should expect relative control of pain .
Pain management follows a certain routine, an increasingly higher ladder .
Your physician must first assess your pain and then prescribe medications equal to his assessment. She WILL NOT start off with stronger meds unless, in her view, the are appropriate to your circumstances. Second , your physician will monitor your pain . Over time, if necessary, pain meds will become stronger or will be increased in size, frequency, or change in kind. They are either ignoring the pain or minimizing it.