When that happens the situation needs to be recalibrated, or adjusted to make it work again. No relationship is perfect. The people who say they've lived together for 40 years without a single argument are living with someone who has repressed their feelings or have chosen to coexist with unfavorable situations. Imperfections should be affirmed, recognize that the difficulties and disagreements are what in the end create a bond of deep love which is enduring. Someone has said that while it is the commonalities which attract people to each other, it is the differences which make them grow.
Marriage is a uniquely fertile ground for fighting infestations to develop.
You and your spouse are sharing living space, you may have one or more children, a dog and a cat or two, plus relatives, a complex shuttling schedule involving getting the kids to soccer matches and piano lessons, not to speak of your own career pressures and financial obligations. All of these factors can create a toxic cocktail of resentment and disagreements. Don't be surprised. Of course, not all fights are good. When we're hurting and angry, we often lash out in ways that are destructive.