One touches the other, the receiver simply feeling the sensation and giving feedback regarding the desirability of the sensation. In these exercises, intercourse is excluded. In addition, initially the male and female genitals and the female breasts are excluded in the touching. Be here now. Consciously focusing our awareness on any sensation, whether it be our breath or the touch of a beloved, can bring us into the present moment.
Many joys can awaken.
As I taught and studied more about sexuality and spirituality in these and other diverse traditions, I saw more clearly many more similarities even though the terminologies are different, even though some stated principles and objectives appear contradictory. Some label this general approach as sacred sex or spiritual sex, sometimes Taoist sex, but tantra seems to be emerging as the most popular nomenclature for many of us in the modern Western world who are seeking deeper meaning in both our sexual and spiritual dimensions. Some writers prefer neo-Tantra, since much of modern Western tantra is not traditional as written in the Tantras, an extensive set of scriptures in the East. My apologies to anyone offended to find his or her tradition classified by a foreign concept. I feel life is served more by discovering the essential truths we have in common than by emphasizing differences in technique, language, cosmology, and tradition.