Second, frequently, remind yourself that the unhelpful thoughts will lead to emotional distress while the helpful ones will lead to emotions that will help you achieve your goals. Third, act in accordance with the more helpful beliefs. This involves facing the discomfort of risking new relationships, if you are currently unattached. It involves not becoming reclusive and acting as if you do not deserve the benefits of sex and intimacy. In summary, herpes itself may involve physical discomfort and impose certain restrictions on one's spontaneity.
Many people experience a variety of intense emotions when they first find out they have herpes.
Anger, sadness, and confusion are normal. However, if you are significantly depressed or immobilized with fear of the future, there are effective ways of combating these difficult emotions and regaining your confidence. See if you can identify the beliefs that are hurting you and make a concerted effort to change them. For help with this process, I would suggest reading Feeling Good by David Burns and A New Guide to Rational Living by Albert Ellis and Robert Harper. All rights reserved.