If you are married, then it is natural to have these thoughts. You need commitment, endurance, problem solving, and fun for a long-term relationship. She doesn't want to kiss after. Many women are uncomfortable receiving oral sex. It is highly overrated.
Many men are enthusiastic about oral sex.
I recommend that you have oral sex maybe after the two of you have showered and then maybe take a break after oral sex and go use mouthwash. The vagina is actually cleaner than the mouth. I have a problem making myself like a guy. I always find things wrong with them right off. If you are critical of guys, it sounds like you are fearful of getting into a relationship.