A young woman contacted us recently who had just moved to New Zealand with her boyfriend when he died suddenly of a brain aneurysm. She left an e-mail message saying that she felt totally alone and didn't know what to do. Within 12 hours, she had loving, caring messages from all over the world. Anger and depression are common symptoms of the third stage of grief. Friends and family may be uncomfortable talking about death.
People often feel that no one can understand what they're going through.
Support groups can help by being a haven for sharing memories and feelings with others who understand. Shaw suggests that people shop around to find the group that fits them, and to take a friend to the first meeting for support and an objective eye. Sheila Friedrich of the support group Bereavement Network in Sacramento, California, lost her youngest son, David, in a water-skiing accident at age 21. She said her support group was the biggest help in learning to cope with her son's death. Friedrich says she became locked in anger over the loss of her son, because she felt guilty that her life didn't change.