The subject of physical and emotional abuse in marriage is difficult to address because spouses cannot usually agree as to what it is.
Physical abuse is easier to define than emotional abuse because there are bruises to prove it.
But even a spouse who seriously injures or even kills the other spouse during a fight can justify his or her behavior as self-defense, not abuse. And the courts often see it that way, too, particularly if women are the ones doing the killing and maiming. On the other hand, a spouse who walks away from an argument can be accused of being emotionally abusive by the spouse who wants to continue arguing. And those who are not home often enough to even discuss an issue are often considered abusive by a neglected spouse. In our society where there are so many rewards for being a victim, it's common for BOTH spouses to claim that it's the other who is being abusive, and in most cases, they're right.