But to paint children of divorce as failures or likely failures is totally unwarranted. In most cases, they are just as well adjusted and successful as the other kids, and some are more so. What makes for a positive outcome, Australian research by Rosemary Dunlop and Ailsa Burns has shown, is a child having a solid and caring relationship with at least one parent, and preferably two. And this is true of children in all families. And equally important for kids' well-being is that divorced parents try hard to end the conflict.
Poverty also influences children's post-divorce family life for the worse.
But divorce, too often, is made to carry the whole burden of negative outcomes for kids. Never mind that the child had shown behavioural problems for the five years before the divorce, or that the intact family had been inattentive to the children. But the rising divorce rate shows many people, despite all they know about post-divorce financial and emotional hardship, still prefer to separate than to remain in empty, cold, loveless or violent marriages. What we heard this week is that family life doesn't stop after divorce. Many people knit new relationships with each other, putting aside personal hurt or loathing for the sake of the children.