Her workplace attitude seemed to bear this out. Lots of difficult people adopt such a pose because they think it delivers results. Granted, some individuals are more aggressively goal-oriented than others, and there are those who take undue advantage of people. Usually, people won't act unscrupulously if you establish yourself as an ally working toward a shared goal. This is a step that many people who interact with difficult personalities never bother with.
Partnership means embracing the same goals and taking action together as allies.
Partnership encourages a pragmatic, results-oriented type of cooperation that adopts a goal the difficult person can get excited about . To become a partner with a difficult person, you may have to make the first move. You're on the other person's side. Don't Dwell on the Past Harping on past problems, on instances where someone should have come through but didn't, will only serve to alienate the person you're dealing with. If you need to clear the air, do so as far as circumstances permit, and then move on.