It is okay to feel one way and act another because your duty requires that of you. Honesty with oneself and one's feelings is important. Hypocrisy and two-facedness is not desirable. One must act the way one feels. Permanent change in personality is viewed with pessimism.
Permanent change is possible, one can become what one wants to be.
There is more optimism about change by individual determination. The culture is rich in boundaries hierarchies stations and stages of life. Boundaries do not exist to the same degree. One can be a student and also avail of worldly pleasures. Retirement does not equal giving up attachment and renouncing worldly pleasures, rather viewed as the time to relax and enjoy.