Then this door, which had been closed to us, just slammed open. I remember feeling guilty during the first few weeks at home. Here I'd been longing for a child for two years. And I wasn't thrilled every moment of the day. No one had ever told me how hard having a baby can be.
People skip over that part.
David and I were bumping into each other, not really sure how to handle baths or long cries or spit ups. I mean, suddenly you have this little person in your life who needs you almost every moment of the day. We'd had no prep classes and found ourselves operating on sheer instinct and common sense. Despite our overall joy, those early days were a really lonely time for me. It wasn't that I loved her any less, it was just that I was overwhelmed.