Before I begin my explanation, let me set the record straight in plain English about some of the characteristics which typify the four groups. It is often difficult to discern whether a wind player is male or female. String players are neurotic prima donnas who won't even shake your hand for fear of permanent injury. Brass players are loud-mouthed drunkards who bully everyone with the possible and occasional exception of a stray percussionist. They like to slick their hair back.
Nobody knows why.
Percussionists are insensitive oafs who constantly make tasteless jokes at the expense of the strings and woodwinds. They look very good in concert attire but have the worst table manners of all musicians. They are always male, or close enough. Oboe players are seriously nuts. They usually develop brain tumors from the extreme air pressure built up over the years of playing this rather silly instrument.