I am afraid I will not be able to face the humiliation that is forthcoming. Right now, I am spending a lot of time contemplating my future, and I see a bleak road. I have thought of ending everything right here and right now. I say to myself there has got to be a better life after this. Deeply depressed Dear Deeply depressed, It sounds like you're under enormous pressure.
Many people get jobs without having an internship during college.
Otherwise, Alice is sure that it can just as well wait until the fall. If you are not at Columbia, make an appointment with your school's career service to find a position that meets your needs as well as to talk with them about the pressure you feel. You haven't even finished your university studies yet and you've decided that you're going to be unemployed forever. This may be uncomfortable given your traditional background, but it may very well help you sort out some of the conflicts you're feeling between your family and cultural values. You may benefit from the experience and perspective of others to help bring honor to your family and to you.