I work at The Big Outlet Store. In the mornings before opening we all stand out in the parking lot and do The Big Outlet Store Chant . The brisk air, the scattered clouds turned to fire. It builds solidarity.
Many customers arrive early just to join in.
Our store is the biggest in a five state region.1,000,000 square feet. We give out maps to customers, we have trams circling the perimeter, we have the biggest selection of toothpaste in the world. We have a full-sized cabin cruiser hanging from the ceiling, propellers slowly rotating above our heads, churning through a sea of air, thirty foot high walls of artificial flowers, giant bins of plushy pillows and, best of all, an archway made of Styrofoam coolers. Our shopping carts have linkages like rail cars so serious customers can form trains of carts. When the store opened a holy man blessed the place, he got a new gas grill.