There are many factors involved in a victim's inability to leave a battering relationship. As in relationships between straight couples, there is a cycle of behavior that includes periods of abuse as well as periods of love and calm which can lead to confusion about whether the abusive partner is really, in fact, abusive. There are also issues of economic dependency, lack of resources, fear and shame that the survivor must deal with in order to break free from the relationship.
Outing is a serious issue in a society that continues to deny gay citizens full rights.
A lesbian who is outed to her employers may lose her job. Being outed to friends or family may cause the loss of relationships to people who have been important in her life. The fear of losing her children by court order can also keep an abused lesbian in an unsafe relationship. Just as male batterers do not have to be physically bigger than their female partners in order to abuse, lesbian batterers are not necessarily bigger, nor are they necessarily more economically independent or part of a more privileged socio-economic class than the partner they abuse. Help Local battered women's hotlines can be a great resource for battered lesbians.