I did not intend to do this and did not realize what effect it would have on our relationship. I would like to learn ways to take down the walls between us. I am afraid that she is coming to the end of her tolerance. Please help me to find a starting point. Answer I would guess that you are like most men who have a tendency to keep their emotions bottled up inside, believing that they have to solve their problems alone.
Most men believe that sharing emotions is a sign of weakness.
Also, they believe that communication is only for the purpose of giving information and solving problems. The fact that you took the time to write and ask for help is a sign that you are willing to learn new behaviors, even if it runs counter to the traditional male approach. There are several exercises that might be helpful for you. First, since you seem to find it a bit easier to write down your thoughts and feelings, let's start there. Begin by writing your wife a letter.