Many people feel so devastated and overwhelmed at a time of death that they assume they should leave all funeral planning to the funeral director. That's like giving the funeral director a blank check. Being actively involved in funeral planning can be very therapeutic, and you won't be grieving over the bill later. Guilt or proof of love.
People often think that how much they spend is a demonstration of how much they love someone.
Poor family planning. Or perhaps Mom told everyone what kind of funeral she wanted, but she had no idea that it would cost far more than anyone could afford. One gentleman was still paying for his wife's funeral when he died eight years later. Families can enjoy making their own traditions. A unique and personalized memorial observance is what others will remember.