My old Russian contact, Ivan the Unbearable, showed up at my door yesterday. Before I knew it, he was plopped on the sectional, drinking my beer, scouring TV Guide. He was pointing to a listing in TV Guide. It's not what you think.
Nobody wants Redskins tickets anymore.
You drink too much wodka. I will rent giant 747 to bring rowdy Redskins fans down. Must call my friend Jack Kent Cooke, smartest owner in sports. He will bankroll deal for his comrade Ivan. The Redskins now belong to the dumbest owner in sports, Dan Snyder.