Thus, finding out what meaning the trauma of being assaulted has for the person is more important than the fact that she was raped. Of course the common reaction to an assault can be generalized but perhaps this person has experienced assault before or has witnessed her mother being stabbed when she was a child. SFBT considers what this means to this person and then construct what might be the first small step toward her feeling a little bit better, such as being able to sleep at night without flashbacks, etc. if that is what she wants. Again, not everyone who were sexually abused or have substance problems attach the same meaning to this experience. Because all such discussions take place through the language, we pay close attention to how the client changes her language and her behavior.
Nothing can be further from truth.
I can't tell you how many times people from the workshop audience come up to me during the break and says how sensitive and in tune with the client's feelings I am when they see my work on videotapes. They are right about this. We do not generally devote a great deal of time to client's suffering and pain or their dysfunctional symptoms either in books or in sessions. The reason clients come to us and seek our help is because they are hurting and they are unhappy with how their life is going and want to change to something, making life more satisfactory and satisfying. Since we do not place emphasis on the detailed history of client's problems, we also do not emphasize the pain and suffering the client is enduring.