Everyone has wart virusues all over their skin, but almost all wart viruses are too damn weak to plant a root and become visible. According to a brochure I picked up at my dermatologist entitledWarts, the average American sports some sixty of these things. You should see this thing - it had photographs of people who have warts on their warts. It s not pretty to think about, but the virus is mildly contagious, which means you can and will get them from handrails, subway seats and other places where wart-ridden citizens drag their infected limbs. All it does is turn your skin white and smell like shit, like Gary Oldman in Coppola s version of Dracula.
Ointments are pointless, because they only treat the surface.
Usually the resulting burn blisters. Then it starts to itch like crazy. A few days later the wart emerges from the gooey bloody hole in your skin, loosely hanging on my the bottom of its root despite it all. Then you yank it out, and if you work in food service, drop it some bad tipper s meal. Even this doesn t always work - some warts come back bigger and better than ever.