Every two hours, pulls ethernet cable from wall and waits for connections to time out. Hacks the code of emacs' doctor-mode to answer new users questions. Maintains queue of questions. Answers them when he gets a chance, often within two weeks of receipt of the proper form. Screams at users until they go away.
Recruits user to system administration team.
Process accounting management. Laughs fool head off at very mention of accounting. Crippled on System V boxes. Prefers BSD, but doesn't care as long as HIS processes run quickly. Balky printer daemons.