I even went so far as to have a mediator hear what we both felt. She refused to talk. The pastor will not let her go. She is having a very negative effect on the school climate. At this point I am trying kindness and love.
Nothing seems to work.
Dear Frustrated, I can really sympathize with your problem. It seems as if you have tried some excellent ideas to no avail. Kindness and love have a way of breaking down barriers but your secretary appears to be a tough nut to crack with some very serious issues. You say she refused to talk to the mediator and the pastor will not let her go. You didn't tell me how long you have been at the school or how long she has been secretary.