Any sober person who doesn't think New Year's Eve is the most insufferable holiday of the year is either lying or not really sober. Normal parties are difficult enough for sober folks. I know the shame of sneaking upstairs to the kitchen sink with your paper cup and, when no one's looking, filling it with tap water to fit in. New Year's Eve borders on sheer torture, simply because you know everyone is going to be drinking. You can't call someone up on New Year's Eve and ask them if they'd like to go see a movie or shoot some pool.
People only have one thing on their minds that day.
Not that there's anything wrong with that, because there's not. If anything, I told myself, it would at least be interesting. And interesting it was. Entertaining, maybe not. Then I tried to strike up conversations with some of my bleary-eyed friends.