A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find that man. To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and don't expect to understand her at all.
Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
A woman marries a man expecting him to change, and he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting her not to change, and she does. A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. He lifted the cow's tail, and Harry saw that the cow had a snatch just like a woman.