Absolutely avoid arguments, struggles, or debates with someone about what they should do. The Expert Trap . Instead, you would like to find out more about this person's behavior and what it means for them. Try to avoid concern with who is to blam for a problem. Blame is not particularly relevant or important to your goals.
Nobody likes to be scolded or talked down to.
Give suggestions and feedback, but do not lecture or scold. Referral Many times, we find ourselves in a situation where someone has sought our advice or support, but we recognize that our ability to help them may be somewhat limited. Making an appropriate referral may be the most helpful thing that you can do to help someone. Your ability to make appropriate referrals will depend on your familiarity with resources available in your area. It may be helpful to remember that a referral is a way of extending additional help, but not a mandate that someone must follow.