Even if the couple is not verbally expressing these behaviors, the non-verbal cues, which are often unconscious, are pretty transparent. It was with these grim statistics in mind that Price became interested in educating couples on the kinds of things that can increase the chances of success. There s a lot of information on the Internet and elsewhere about cultivating successful marriages and partnerships. It s a grassroots ground swell that got an early start from an ecumenical movement called Marriage Savers , a program that clergy nationwide have utilized for some time, Price said. One of the tenets of Marriage Savers is that participating clergy won t officiate at weddings where the partners haven t undergone at least three premarital counseling sessions.
Price says the idea has caught on.
There are some states that will give couples a rebate on their marriage license fees if they receive premarital counseling. People are beginning to see the benefits of supporting successful partnerships. The cost of divorce is too high financially, emotionally and societally, says Price. Once a couple has established the jobs, the house and the kids, somewhere in the midst of all that, they need to step back and examine the relationship, says Oliver. Oliver draws on the work of John Gottman, who has done extensive writing and research on what accounts for long-term success in couples.