Try to keep the beer goggles off at all costs. You'll never get your buddies to shut up. Drunk girls think that you're married the next morning. Stick to the under 150 lb weight limit. You've gotta make sure that you can toss the bitch around when she gets out of line.
Red heads are trouble.
Large girls are trouble. Girls that wear pants that are baggier than yours are trouble. A movie is a good date cause you don't have to talk. Foreign girls are good. Distance is prime.