It is a crime of dominance and control using sex to express power and anger. Sex is between two consenting partners.
Rape is an aggressive act using sex as a weapon.
To be raped is to be violated and stripped of control and self-determination. A dream is not reality. Dreaming about something does not mean you actually want to be raped. Rape occurs when an attacker takes control from a woman in reality. Men and society in general use this excuse.