She became depressed, then frightened by what would happen if her husband ever left her. After all, he controlled the money. There were no marks on her body, says Richard Tolman, an associate professor of social work at the University of Michigan who has worked with perpetrators of domestic violence and their partners. But she was a victim of domestic violence nonetheless. Every year, an estimated two million to four million women in the United States are victims of domestic violence, a public-health problem that is difficult track due to the shame and stigma still attached to it.
Psychological abuse is even more difficult to quantify.
No one goes to the emergency room after being humiliated. It's difficult to file a complaint with law-enforcement agencies charging that your partner controls the family finances or isolates you from your friends. Further, the victims of psychological abuse may not even realize they are being abused. They may feel bad about themselves or their relationship, says Tolman, but they may not connect that feeling with their partner's behavior. Psychological abuse, often called emotional or verbal abuse, is the belittling, humiliation, intimidation or threatening of a partner.