Discuss what both of you are and are not ready for sexually. You can use a dental dam, a latex glove, or even saran wrap. Using a condom every time for anal and vaginal intercourse will reduce the risk of HIV transmission and pregnancy. You may choose to use another form of birth control in addition to a condom. Always use water based lubricants.
Oil based lubricants can break down latex.
To protect you and your partner use condoms over shared sex toys and change barriers between partners. Clean needles by rinsing several times with bleach then with water. Know that you are special, but not an anomaly. Surround yourself with supportive people. Don't let other people's bigotry make you feel bad about who you are.