You can't have children because there's no name you could give a child that wouldn't bring on high blood pressure the moment you heard it uttered. You think caffeine should be available to staff in IV form. It must be like playtime for you. Your personal life comes to a screeching halt at report card time. Real teachers cheer when they hear April 1 does not fall on a school day.
Real teachers drive older cars owned by credit unions.
Real teachers clutch a pencil while thinking and make notes in the margins of books. Real teachers can't walk past a crowd of kids without straightening up the line. Real teachers never sit down without first checking the seat of the chair. Real teachers have disjointed necks from writing on boards without turning their backs on the class. Real teachers are written up in medical journals for size and elasticity of kidneys and bladders.