Sean disappeared into the darkness so you couldn't reach him. He has a girlfriend, and he wants to remain anonymous. Don't feel blue about an encounter that was going nowhere. You're using Sean and this experience as a replacement for how you feel about yourself and the life you are living. A child stands before a refrigerator laden with food, front to back and top to bottom.
Life is a fridge that's absolutely jammed packed with great things.
You can make gorgeous gourmet meals and the most wonderful sandwiches, but they don't make themselves. It's not that there's nothing to eat, but that you're not making the effort. The effort is what gives you the reward. You can cure this. Think about what you like to do, can do more of, do differently, or explore for the first time.