It is your husband's job to contribute to your children's security as well. Membership in a family should entitle you to negotiate about the available resources, which relate concretely to your feelings of both love and protection. Many situations can be negotiated which take into account the needs and rights of previous spousal relationships and also value the needs of new family relationships. Talk with other couples and families who have worked out satisfying agreements in complex situations. The more complex your situation, the greater the need for discussion .
Marriage represents the blending of two families, including financial and emotional caretaking.
It is disappointing to you that your husband has not been proactive in his consideration of your needs and the needs and protection of his stepchildren. It is your job as a spouse to communicate your needs and your disappointment. Just as it is his responsibility to let you know if he feels or fears being taken advantage of in the relationship for his money. Through discussion, you have a chance to experience your partner's reality. Equitable agreements are spawned through empathic connection, not cut-off.