Parents may think children are not aware of conflict, but they are. Children are just as upset by nonverbal as by verbal conflict. There are many pathways of influence on children s peer relationships. I talked about the direct effect of seeing how parents deal with conflict. The marital relationship also has a significant impact on the parent-child relationship.
Marital conflict undermines parents ability to discipline children appropriately and effectively.
It is never too late to start handling disagreements in better ways, for spouses sake, for the sake of their marriage, and for the sake of their children. It is important that couples deal with their disagreements openly and calmly, respect and listen to one another, try to work toward a solution, and try to not let their anger get the better of them. There's reason to believe that parent education programs can help improve the quality of the parental relationship. Phil and Karen Cowan at Berkeley have shown dramatic effects in this area. They looked at two approaches to helping parents who were experiencing family problems.