In the abortion ritual, the grievers meet privately with the rabbi or in a small circle of friends and family. They are directed to sit on hard chairs to remind them of the hard place in which they find themselves. The ritual acknowledges the grief of the would-be parents. Sometimes the choices can make our lives rich and beautiful. Sometimes the choices are filled with pain, or it feels like we have no choice at all.
Nothing can make the ending of a pregnancy easy.
The ceremony affirms the sanctity of life and reaffirms the mourners' faith in God. While Jewish law doesn't endorse elective abortion, Eilberg maintains she is not making a political statement through the ritual. At least one area rabbi didn't need the manual to know that women need a special ritual for the loss of an unborn child. Sheldon Lewis, spiritual leader of the Conservative Congregation Kol Emeth in Palo Alto, said he took his cue from a congregant who had undergone psychological counseling following an abortion. Counseling offered the woman little respite from her grieving, so Lewis decided to write a special prayer for her.