When he asked where the toilet was he was told it was in fact the big hole in the floor in the middle of the shower. Meanwhile, if England are struggling to win over the Albanian people, they can always get coach Peter Taylor to do his Norman Wisdom impression. Comedian Wisdom is an icon in Albania where they repeatedly show his film Trouble in Store, which they say portrays an exploited worker fighting capitalism. Chelsea were the butt of InterToto jokes this week after newspapers claimed they had been forced to enter to rescue the chance of playing in Europe next season. Not true, said Chelsea, they'd applied ages ago.
Notebook knows it's a shock but football clubs do tell the truth sometimes.
The Football Association confirmed that managing director Colin Hutchinson wrote to them on 26 January saying Chelsea would like to be considered as a possible third round entrant in July. West Ham have also applied along with Aston Villa, Coventry, Leicester, Everton, Newcastle and, surprisingly, Leeds. We know he's called Psycho, but it seems Stuart Pearce is just as scary off the pitch, even when he's just having a pint and watching one of his favourite bands play. It took Warren Wilson, guitarist of Spear of Destiny, all of his courage to approach Pearce at the Forum in Kentish Town last Friday to ask for his autograph. Happily, Pearce signed his name in ink and not blood.