Weekends are those days your spouse makes you stay home. Being sick is defined as can't walk or you're in the hospital. You're already late on the assignment you just got. Dilbert cartoons hang outside every cube. Vacation is something you roll over to next year or a check you get every January.
Nepotism is encouraged.
The only reason you recognize your kids is because their pictures are hanging in your cube. You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting. You read this entire list and understood it. .