Because of this, family members, and the individual to the greatest extent possible, are asked to spend a few minutes talking about the individual's life history, including some of the milestones. This question is intended to get people to develop a vision for the individual's future, to consider what they want for that person, and to look beyond the current reality. Those dreams can become reality if there is a common commitment to strive for them. This is a very difficult question to ask the parents of any child, yet an extremely important one. The nightmare presents the situation that the members of the individual's team and others who care for him or her must work very hard to keep from happening.
Parents frequently relate the nightmare as a vision of their child being alone.
Everyone in the circle participates in responding to this question. There are no right or wrong words. Participants take turns going around the circle until all thoughts have been expressed. Participants can pass if nothing comes to mind when it is their turn to supply a descriptor. When the list is complete, the facilitator asks certain people, usually family and peers, to identify the three words from the list they feel best describe the individual.