If you cannot live for yourself, then live for me. Yes, I know you hate. But hate is a part of love. Hate is not the opposite of love, indifference is the opposite of love. And yes, I know you suffer.
Mental illness is the most painful of all human illnesses.
And life is a struggle. It is for all such as you, both heroes and heroines. Such people do exist, and you have a right to be afraid of them. We all have a right to be afraid of them. That can be your asylum, too.