Paralyzed from the neck up. Parked his head and forgot where he left it. Playing baseball with a rubber bat. Playing hockey with a warped puck. Playing Scrabble, but we can't figure out what words he's building.
Pressure's up, but there's a slow leak somewhere.
Puts a finger in his ear so the draft through his head isn't annoying. Fucked-up as a soup sandwich. Reading from an empty disk. Reads Homer in the original Greek, but doesn't know Greek. Receiver is off the hook.