There are two mistakes one can make when considering the consequences of divorce for children. The second is to assume every child will be harmed by divorce. Both views are wrong. While divorce does raise significantly the risk of poor outcomes for children, some children do fine following divorce. And while some children do fine following divorce, many do not.
Life is complicated.
So is divorce. On the other hand, I do not mean to give the impression parents can do nothing to help their children adjust to divorce. The answer is not to pretend that divorce is just one of many different lifestyle choices that provide children with an equal likelihood of success. Rather, we need to emphasize that it is precisely because divorce places children at increased risk of poor outcomes that divorced parents have to work even harder to ensure their children do well. First, place the needs of your child clearly above your own.