See your dealer for details. This message paid for by the Jeffords in '04 Caucus. There are Femme Tops, Butch Bottoms, and switches on both sides of the aisle. There's nothing wrong with that, just as there's nothing wrong with it if she doesn't want to be on top. A true femme will never tell.
New shoes can absolutely count as a sex toy in a femme's mind.
It is the wise butch who remembers that when her femme comes home with a sexy new pair of black strappy sandals with a high heel. I just chose it as an activity that tends to feature a certain amount of bending over. Feel free to substitute weeding, swapping out the sparkplugs in the old Rambler, laying tile in the front hallway, or whatever suits your girl. Whichever she prefers. Sometimes femmes who are experiencing menstrual cramps and discomfort will welcome a few quick orgasms for the sake of pain relief.