Don't say she is a drunk, but that she drinks a lot. Do not risk being beguiled by appearances and constructing theories and interpretations based on distortions through misnaming. Give your assent only to what is actually true. Circumstances do not rise to meet our expectations. Events happen as they do.
People behave as they are.
Embrace what you actually get. But remember that they have their own distinct character, which is quite a separate matter from how we happen to regard them. As an exercise, consider the smallest things to which you are attached. For instance, suppose you have a favorite cup. Remember, for example, when you embrace your child, your husband, your wife, you are embracing a mortal.