OK, you have had the opportunity to see the New You in a feared situation. It might be helpful to write down your answers. Perhaps, now is the time to take that first step. Avoidance allows one to stay in their comfort-zone, however, one pays a price for this comfort. Avoidance severely restricts the options available to you.
People do make healthy changes in their lives.
I would be happy to answer your questions about Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy. Eat desert first, life is more fun when we make changes.