True union, true marriage, occurs when God joins the spirit of the man with the spirit of the woman. Just as your spirit has become one with God's Holy Spirit, so a true marriage occurs when you are both are spiritually united. So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. After a couple becomes one spirit, and one flesh, they spend the rest of their married life working to become one soul.
Marriage is a uniting of two spirit beings.
That is why a marriage ought to be between two people who are born again. An abuser acts in a selfish way to fulfill their lusts on another party. This requires the person concerned to forgive by the Grace of God, it will open the door to healing for both parties. God is able. This does not mean that the problem will cease completely, we all need to respond to the Spirit and counsel of the Word and seek God's way.