Older women have jobs with dental plans. Younger women can't help you when your teeth get knocked out playing hockey. Older women take charge of the situation. An older woman will call you up and ask you for a date. A younger woman will wait forever, by the phone, for you to call.
Older women know how to cook.
Young women know how to dial Pizza Hut Take out. An older woman will introduce you to all of her girlfriends. A younger woman will avoid her girlfriends when she's with you, in case you get any ideas. Older women are psychic. You never have to confess to having an affair, because somehow they always know.