If you have not yet been allured by the promise of seeing strangers perform routine bodily functions in the comfort of your own living room you watch them in your living room, that's not where they are performed you may still be laboring under the misapprehension that the best live action on television is sport.
Drastic measures are afoot.
At the end of each week, the entire squad will don baggy greens and replica Merv Hughes moustaches and vote one member of the team off the tour. Already they've cast their first ballots. And, as Matthew Elliott has found, if you rub the tribe up the wrong way could have a very long Pura Cup career ahead of you. These meetings should not only provide entertaining viewing but, by the time the Australian team has been reduced to two or three players, ensure a more competitive series. A camera will be attached to each player's tray table and David Boon, disguised as a luscious flight attendant, will be on hand to provide both special comments and, when required, a bucket.