I could appreciate separate colors without needing them to be my rainbow. When I was growing up, my father frequently talked about a man that he worked with who came from Japan. He really liked this man. My father's world view was enriched by his association with that friend. His accounts conveyed tremendous respect without ever needing to find ways the man was similar to us.
Respect is a key concept in accepting differentness.
Many years ago, I was sitting on a stage with Judy Heumann and an interviewer asked us what we found most disturbing about others' attitudes toward us. Judy said she most resented their need for us to be nondisabled. I'm ashamed to say I didn't totally get it then, but I do now. There is a great lack of respect for who I am as a disabled person conveyed by people who either wish I could be normal or who need to see my disability as an unimportant part of me. Complete our quick survey.