Our decision to allow our suffering to continue instead of having it released by forgiveness and love can at best be described as a perverse choice. Sometimes our greatest difficulty is to accept forgiveness from either God or ourselves. Each of us sins, and each of us needs forgiveness at some period in our lives. Our sense of shame does not allow us to appropriate the price Christ paid on Calvary. We are so focused on our sins we lose sight of our forgiving and welcoming God.
Resentment is another source of pain and suffering.
Resentment is defined as bitterness or ill-will, being indignant or aggrieved. Once again it is our choice whether we will hold fast to the memories of pain, and replay them again and again in our minds. We can become so fixated on the pain and suffering that reason flies out the window. Our focus narrows into a pinpoint of pain - acute and agonising pain. In this state of absorption we are unaware, or in denial, of the possibility of our healing.