Three of the four emphasize how our family relationships and childhood needs or conflicts influence our choice of lovers. Awareness of these motives, which we are usually only vaguely conscious of, might help us understand and cope with our attraction to certain people. Probably no other area has mystified us as much as love. I consider the books in the last two paragraphs to be the most helpful.
Love relationships change from one stage to another.
He does not rely heavily on research nor does he deal with psychopathology, but his messages about the joys and foibles of love are masterpieces. He motivates you to be loving, rather than informs you. We must learn to take care of our own hurts, then we can develop our own ideas of love, not just struggle to comply with our parents' notions of love. Obviously, many relationship problems can be traced back to early childhood experiences and to gender stereotypes in our family and culture. Psychoanalytic theory suggests that it is frightening for men to become totally intimate with and under the control of a women again.