The Buddhists say there are 149 ways to God. I'm not looking for God, only for myself, and that is far more complicated. God is bigger, like my mother, easier to find, even in the dark. I can't ask for help. If you're a hero you can be an idiot, behave badly, ruin your personal life, have any number of mistresses and talk about yourself all the time and nobody minds.
Heroes are immune.
Mostly they enjoy the company of other men, although attractive women are part of their reward. You play, you win, you play, you lose. It's the playing that's irresistible. Dicing from one year to the next with the things you love, what you risk reveals what you value. To kiss well one must kiss solely.