What appears to be negative behavior is often merely a defensive response. What one person does, another can model. The meaning of one's communication is the response obtained, not necessarily what was meant. Building rapport is often more important than the use of logic to facilitate a party's shift in their construction of reality. The basic strategy is to build rapport with other parties by pacing and leading them.
Rapport is the process of establishing and maintaining a human bond and responsive relationship.
It is done through the use of language, stories and metaphors. With practice in mirroring, one can change their physiology and behavior instinctively as the other person changes, and in a sense, enter the other person's reality. Leading follows from pacing. There comes a point when parties developed sufficient rapport such that one will willingly or unwillingly follow the other person's lead. Language skills and verbal techniques can be used to build rapport, pace and lead.