People grumble about Noah letting coyotes on the Ark. The restrooms are outside. Never in its entire 100-year history has one of its pastors had to buy any meat or vegetables. When it rains, everybody's smiling.
Prayers regarding the weather are a standard part of every worship service.
The church directory doesn't have last names. The pastor wears boots. Four generations of one family sits together in worship every Sunday. The only time people lock their cars in the parking lot is during the summer, and then only so their neighbors can't leave them a bag of squash. There is a special fund-raiser for a new septic tank.