Tonight it's gonna be me and Betsy 40 feet away from a stage with 5 Barenaked Ladies on it. There's going to be a pre-party at a bar a few blocks from the Pepsi. I thought it might be fun to go there and get blitzed before the show, but then I realized that I have to work at 8am tomorrow morning, and I'd probably just fall asleep during the opening act. And I'd probably do something really stupid, like telling a security guard about my camera and tape recorder. Or that it's been almost a year since Dan went down on me.
Nothing happens in Albany ever.
My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips. If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen. You have the right to remain silent, so shut up. Sorry if I look interested, I'm not. I'm not inflatable.