I am having the crudest of problems with my spousal companion. It seems that she has taken to wet her hiney in the porcelain facilities we share on more than one occassion. Now she chooses to blame me for her odd warped fetish, claiming that she is moist due to my reluctance to return the seat to its rested state after my own use of said facilities. Surely you can see through this veiled charade and realize that this is merely a cover-up for a very strange fascination. To bother one with such a question.
Polite society knows that one never unclenches one's sphincter, especially for such a low purpose.
Do not write one again. One is certain she is acquainted with whatever 'Precious Moments' figurines may be. One neither knows nor cares, oneself. Ever since last year, and a silly misunderstanding, he has called me by an annoying nickname. I have known him for 2 years and he always finds some way to annoy me whenever I see him.