Children will learn from their mistakes so we need to let them choose as long as their choices are not life threatening, morally threatening or unhealthy. I will not treat a child in a way I don't want to be treated and discipline works if both parent and child are left with their dignity intact. We can't take our children's pain on ourselves. We have to hear them and support them in their pain. We need to celebrate with our children.
Parties are great especially in times of grieving and loss.
Our job is to empower and influence our children, not to control them. When communicating with your children be sure that your body, face, eyes, tone of voice and what you say are all consistent when you are being open and honest. Sometimes we give conflicting messages when our face and eyes say one thing and our words are saying another. Our children need our time, affection and our sense of optimism and our unconditional love in times of difficulty.