When we understand only the surface of others, we perceive mostly the differences between us. But when we can move beyond the surface to the core, we are able to see our mutual oneness, our mutual brotherhood and identity. This is the essence of love.
Meeting takes place when two people relate to each as things.
Only this kind of meeting allows us to grow as human beings. The concept of love has been distorted in our society by the romantic, erotic, or sexual connotations it has been given. We have an idea that love is an accumulation of pleasant feelings. Loving an individual has been the excuse for possessing someone or controlling them or remaking them into what we want them to be. These are not ways of loving.