They knew that it is your right to pick a mate. But it doesn't have to be this way. Anyone can and should pick. Picking can improve you life . Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty were lucky that the Prince picked them, but you cannot count on the odds.
Picking increases the odds and saves time and hassle.
Picking rids one of idleness . If you stand around waiting for someone to pick you, you are inactive. At least if you are actively picking, you have a lot of searching and working to do between picks. Picking exercises control . You are only with those whom you choose.