We are making very real sacrifices and serious accommodations to make the situation successful. Our expectation is for a long and happy kiddushin together - that building across the street and our community. But that's not what we need from Saint Matthews, from this building this sanctuary. That model isn't going to help us. Most of Jewish tradition views sexuality as the yetzer hara, the evil urge.
Many regulations exist to discipline men's supposedly uncontrollable sex drive.
And women are also sexually constrained - alienated from subjectivity in relation to our own sexuality. Gay and bisexual men are also constrained - the model does not describe their sexual experience. Even heterosexual men are constrained because they are taught an unhealthy model of sexuality. Judaism conceives of sexuality as a powerful chaotic force in need of civilizing institutions such as monogamous heterosexual marriage. In this context the powerful urge is tamed and made licit.