It is important for women to claim their dark side as part of their whole, like men have for centuries. Historically, men have controlled women's access to pleasure, but that is changing. You see manifestations of this all over the place. Women go to male strip clubs, the fashion industry displays the male body as it never has before and, according to Nancy Friday's book Women on Top, women's sexual fantasies have actually changed and become more aggressive. It is kind of healthy that we women are taking on a fully human carnality that is part of our status as human beings.
Perfectionism is a stranglehold on the personality's growth.
I would argue the opposite, even though it scares me. We will never be grown up in the existential sense as women until we dare to look at what is profoundly imperfect about ourselves. There's got to be a way to talk about that whole range of desires within feminism. In a way it's not too cool to say I am just as capable of objectifying a man, of using a man, of wanting to possess a man, of being solipsistic, of being self-absorbed, as a man is. It doesn't mean I have to be ruled by these impulses.