I'm really scared because of all the talk about how parents should be responsible for their children's behavior. I didn't get much parenting from my mother and my father died when I was 2. Like Kate's mother, many people wonder about how to be a good parent. We're trained well to become doctors, lawyers, bakers and candlestick makers, but not to become parents even though parenting is one of our most important and long-lasting jobs. But judging from the number of magazines and web sites whose titles include words like parents, parenting, and families, there's a world of people that want help and information.
Most parents have a vision of what they want their child to be like.
Sometimes the vision gets clouded by everyday pressures. Starting even before a baby is born, parents have to make decisions - natural vs. assisted childbirth, bottle vs. breastfeeding, day care vs. home care vs. nanny care, working vs. staying home, strict vs. permissive discipline, and so on. Knowing when to worry is another dilemma. All these daily dilemmas are certainly important in the lives of children, but what counts most of all is their parents' overall style and attitude. It's the overall pattern of interactions rather than one single act that shapes children's behavior.