Unfortunately, perceptions reign over facts, and so misperceptions can derail meaningful dialogue. Both sides may get lost trying to justify their positions. Trustees may answer beneficiaries' demands with legally appropriate responses that do not satisfy the beneficiaries' need for money or increase their understanding of the trustees' position. Animosity can build and prevent any meaningful exchanges of information. Beneficiaries often feel powerless and start believing that the only way to get justice is by filing a suit.
Mediators can provide a critical service to both trustees and beneficiaries.
Being independent, with no stake in the outcome, they can meet with the parties together and separately to help them focus on a search for a solution that meets the needs of all. The confidentiality of the mediation process allows each person to be candid with the mediator both in private and in joint meetings with all the parties. Hidden agendas are extremely common in wealth transfer situations, but the parties can reveal their concerns in private meetings with the mediator without compromising their positions. Trust officers may feel that the deck is stacked against them when they try to have a healthy relationship with beneficiaries. Friendly conversation opens the door to subsequent allegations that the Trustee made oral representations that have not been honored.