So we were told, and taught, that our feelings were wrong. He is there for us when we need him, although he will complain about it. He does good things, and good acts. This never fit into what I believed was a profile of an abuser. But this is not necessarily true.
People are complex beings.
Just because one side of their personality is unhealthy, doesn't mean that they are all bad. But at the same time, just because someone does good, doesn't give them the right to be abusive. But as children, this teaches us that our emotions are wrong, or cant be trusted. Plus, why would we want to even have feelings if they are just going to get trampled. He could do it just as well.