Really obvious hints don't work. No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. We're not mind readers and we never will be. OUr lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
Most guys own three pairs of shoes.
Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.