His words were so vague and obscure that I didn't know he was telling me my father was dead. That's when I knew what had happened. Standing in the middle of a silent classroom of peers, I learned what an adult couldn't tell me, my father had died. Children should either always attend funerals or never attend. It really needs to be the choice of the child or adolescent.
Rituals help with closure, but each child is a unique individual.
They need to be supported and educated in what will happen to participate in what is right for them. Loss fades quickly for a child. No one gets over a significant loss. We can accept it, adjust to it, and learn to live with it, but it doesn't go away. The fact that a child can play may fool others into thinking that grief is over.