For instance, guilt over premarital sex may create barriers to enjoyment later on. Any perceived sexual sin could cause a person to feel unworthy of sexual pleasure. Fortunately, confession and forgiveness bring cleansing from real guilt. And false guilt, like the shame a person who has been abused may feel, can be identified and overcome, usually with counseling. Sometimes frequency of intercourse can be inhibited by fear, which is experienced by both men and women.
Fears can stem from early sexual abuse, performance failure, or even the possibility of pregnancy.
Sometimes shame, a feeling created by disapproval and humiliation, enters the picture. Some people feel shame associated with nakedness, whether from their family of origin or from some thoughtless ridicule within the marriage. Revealing yourself totally always carries a risk of embarrassment or rejection. Jealousy is a potent disrupter of sexual balance as well. Since marriage begins with a vow of exclusivity, it's crucial for spouses to express any hint of jealousy.