In the last two generations of church teaching regarding marriage roles we have been told that marriage and family come first. This mind-set has led us to assume a theology that puts marriage and family members before God. Unfortunately, when marriage is the primary relational focus rather than relationship with and obedience to God, it becomes subject to the will and weakness of its partners. The consequences are often unfruitful for home and heaven.
Marriage has a heavenly ordination that goes beyond family bliss.
It is a tool for spouses to more completely fulfill God's destiny in their lives. But it is second to service to God. Misunderstanding about the role of marriage in the church can shipwreck sincere Christians when trouble develops with their spouses. Our traditions have subtly built an altar that makes married domestic tranquility the spiritual qualifier of Christians. In some cases it is a prerequisite for individuals, particularly women, to be received in ministry settings.