Spleens generally prefer Twizzlers, due to the elongated shape and twisty patterns. However, some spleens are chocoholics, and should be given large packages of Sno-Caps and large drinks. Do not feed your spleen popcorn when it is in this delicate state, because the kernels get lodged in its teeth and the frustration can send it into shock. I asked a little further and found out that my spleen likes to bathe in it. I conducted a survey of 500 random spleens and found that 99 out of 100 spleens prefer a phlegm rubdown to pledge.
Phlegm is special, though, because it's consistency is so compatible with both the spleen and spam.
I'm not sure how my spleen found out how great phlegm is, but I've always suspected that my spleen is smarter than the average spleen - it's always been rather clever. I don't know how, but my spleen created a tube leading from itself to my esophagus, where there is a special membrane that draws the phlegm into the tube. My studies show that not just my spleen is partial to phlegm, but in fact the vast majority of spleen like it. My spleen may have been just lucky or something, I don't know, but never the less, this vital information has been discovered and all who care about their spleen can now treat it to something new and exciting. Some folks have what is called in the medical domain as an 'accessory' Spleen.