Success is measured by validation from others and meeting external performance standards. Striving for wholeness, however, recognizes the individual's unique challenges as well as gifts. Appropriate goals are derived from inner awareness. The person can find joy even in small, personal triumphs. Perfectionists punish themselves for making mistakes, and growth may be paralyzed by shame.
Individuals striving for wholeness can recognize and learn from mistakes, let go, and move ahead.
They are able to use mistakes as part of the learning process. Excelling in all areas of performance is a trap for perfectionists. They believe that unless they do well in every area of their lives, they are inadequate and unworthy. It is not required that we develop a fullness of all gifts in this life. We are all given weakness to teach us compassion and humility.