But the rewards I've received from helping women learn how to take control of their sexlives have been far greater than dollars and cents. I was also surprised that the Modern Maturity survey didn't mention the use of sex toys and erotic entertainment, which has become a major industry. The only reference to sexual aids was pharmaceutical with the use of Viagra and testosterone patches. Many older women have told me they would love to take a vacation from the old missionary position style of intercourse and simply enjoy manual or oral sex with their husbands. Thirty years of teaching sex has taught me that heterosexual women are at the greatest risk for sexual dysfunction.
Masturbation remains the missing link in our understanding of human sexuality.
We will be able to go to a higher degree of pleasure with sex when we accept masturbation as the basis for orgasmic partnersex. It's how women learn to have orgasms, and how men learn to extend the time frame before ejaculation. It provides couples with sexual variety, it keeps the sexual home fires burning during illness and separations, and it's a must to remain sexual in old age when most of us need more direct stimulation that is under our own control. Modern Maturity could help older Americans by including a few articles that not only support, but also applaud masturbation. By continuing to ignore the existence of the kind of sex that so many of us enjoy with ourselves, we will remain in the sexual dark ages of guilt, shame, and disgust over our natural bodily functions.