Although you may not win all of the battles, you can still win the war. Deed from the Doer is a parenting tool that separates a child's actions from their identity as worthy people. The underlying premise is that a child is still loved although parents may not love what he or she has done. The action does not determine the value of the child in the parent's eyes. If a child misbehaves, the parent does not shame or blame the child but states how that particular action was inappropriate or how disappointed they are with that behavior.
Parents can remind the child of the rule that was violated.
In addition, parents may need to communicate a need to solve the problem created by the child's action. Doing nothing is useful for overprotective or controlling parents. These type of parents have difficulty letting their child experience life on their own. They have difficulty letting children make decisions on their own and want to protect them from failure. Unfortunately, failure is how we learn not to make future mistakes.