In order to appreciate the changes ahead for these parents, let's review some common patterns of parenting for married couples. First, in most families, moms have considerably more contact with the children than do dads, with 3 times as many face to face interactions. In addition, dad time with the kids often includes the mother as well, with moms mediating interactions between dad and the kids, facilitating communication or smoothing the rough points. Mother's and father's roles in the family are often complementary. Mom time with the kids generally involves more reciprocal role taking and comfort giving.
Moms are also more likely than dads to chat with and listen to their children.
As a result, moms are the more likely parent to know their children's interests, friends, preferences, and goals. Dads, on the other hand, prefer playful interaction with their children. These complementary roles suggest that mom and dad make a great alliance together. Maccoby and Mnookin's data suggest that each parent has a lot of learning to do after separation. Dads are more likely than moms to report problems in monitoring their children's school progress, whereabouts, friends, and interests.