You become aware that you have choices. I practice cognitive behavior therapy. Yet they have an enormous influence over your emotions and behavior. In treatment, first you identify and articulate the rote thoughts that may get in your way and create problems. Then you look at them - objectively.
Most people believe in the validity of their scripts without question.
Once you get clear on what assumptions are running your life, you are in a position to choose whether or not you will act on them and whether or not you wish to modify them. This puts you in control of your life - relatively quickly. However, a trained, impartial observer is in a better position to spot problem areas than you are, and to help you stay out of guilt, depression, etc. Since it is your life, you choose whether or not you want to deal with a particular problem area. I point out why I think it may be in your interest to take charge - and how to do so .