Real programmers never work 9 to 5. If any Real Programmers are around at 9 a.m., it's because they were up all night. Real programmers disdain structured programming. Structured programming is for compulsive neurotics who were prematurely toilet-trained. They wear neckties and carefully line up sharp pencils on an otherwise clear desk.
Real programmers have no use for managers.
Managers are a necessary evil. They exist only to deal with personnel bozos, bean counters, senior planners, and other mental defectives. Real programmers scorn floating point arithmetic. Real programmers don't drive clapped-out Mavericks. They prefer BMWs, Lincolns, pickup trucks with floor shifts or 140mph Taurus SHOs.