Place the MS-DOS onto a cutting board. With a large meat cleaver, hack off Doublespace, Backup, and half of the useful DOS commands. Place this into bowl. Place into bowl. With large wooden spoon, vigorously mix contents in bowl, permitting computer rag reporters occasional glimpses into the mess.
Place contents into bread pan and bake at a low heat for a couple of years.
When a Microsoft application can be inserted and withdrawn without clumps sticking, pronounce done.