An act of charity, no matter how commendable, normally takes place occasionally and at a distance. Parenting a child is up-close and personal. Our commitment to our children, like any other parents', is total. It does not depend on sympathy, pity, or a desire to feel good. I couldn't love an adopted child as much as one of my own.
Many people seem to believe that a genetic tie is necessary for a happy family.
If that were so, presumably you would love your husband or wife much less than you love your brother or sister. This belief seems to underlie much of the media treatment of particular families. In reports of child abuse, for example, reporters seem to find it necessary to indicate if the perpetrator or the victim was adopted. But some children become available for adoption because they were abused or neglected by their birth families, and even years of loving care may not cure the anger that was thus sown. I want a child who looks like me.