Practice peace-compatible discipline . Adopt a preventive approach to discipline. Be sure expectations are age appropriate, clear, and understood ahead of time. Be sure consequences are related to the offense, that they are clearly stated and understood ahead of time, and that they are as immediate and consistent as possible. Make behaving and cooperation more desirable than misbehaving by expressing appreciation when they occur.
People tend to respond much more favorably to fans than to critics.
Jane Nelsen reminds us in Positive Discipline , our children do not have to be made to feel worse in order to do better. Choose peaceful forms of entertainment . Pay close attention to the messages your children are getting about relationships, conflict, violence, and peace from television, movies, toys, games, music, and literature. Take advantage of these opportunities to explain why the way a situation was handled was unacceptable. Engage your children in a dialogue about how the situation could have been dealt with in a more peaceful manner.