A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. The honeymoon is over when the husband calls home to say he'll be late for dinner and the answering machine says it is in the microwave. A very expensive way to get your laundry done free. A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. A woman's means for keeping a man from reading between the lines. A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish, too.