This is skewed and is not a true picture of our lives. Constructive Living is about seeing reality - not just the pleasant or unpleasant parts of reality. Many of the current methods of treating the thoughts and feelings of those sexually abused as children actually increase attention to the thoughts and feelings. The client is encouraged to express her emotions, to lay the blame at the feet of the abuser, to mourn the loss of her childhood, to confront those who did not protect her, etc. Many clients have been thrown into crisis by such unhealthy shifts of attention.
People are generally interested in working with issues that effect their present life.
Speaking about past painful experiences may help some people, but focusing on them for an extended period of time can prolong suffering and distort the past. Working With What's Controllable One of the great gifts CL offers my clients is the knowledge that one cannot control one's thoughts and feelings by an act of will. Clients are relieved to know that they are not responsible for feeling hatred, anger, love, or fear. They did not create the feelings and neither are they responsible for them. Most are also relieved to know they are not responsible for their thoughts and that thoughts do not have any deep and significant hidden meaning.