They separated in 1997 and are divorced. Fidelity had not been a problem before, Slone says, and living together first only tainted her expectations of how the marriage would be. Each partner often has unrealistic expectations that all the marriage glitches have been worked out, Markey says. Habits also form before marriage that interfere with the commitment essential for a healthy relationship. Couples who live together first are more likely to have an affair during marriage than those who do not, Markey says.
Experts suggest dating longer rather than living together.
Rosenthal, Beauchamp and countless other couples believe communication and intimacy can develop while living together. But Richard Shanks, the pastoral care minister in charge of the premarital program at Southeast Christian Church, disagrees. I'm not saying that people who are outside of the church can't have a happy marriage . . . Opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by members of the Coalition. All rights reserved.