Fathers Non-fathers wear expensive Italian shoes. Fathers wear vinyl loafers that are made nowhere near Italy. Non-fathers drive cars that hold the turns. Fathers drive cars that hold the kids. Non-fathers fly to Switzerland.
Fathers drive to Disneyland.
Non-fathers spend weekends taking in the theater. Fathers spend weekends taking out the trash. Non-fathers like to use their Sundays fixing brunch and Bloody Marys for six close friends. Fathers spend Sundays oiling training wheels, hitting the discount stores for sales on cornstarch, and waking up at exactly the same ungodly hour as they do on a weekday. Non-fathers eat seafood quiche.