Today we are still together. We have been married 14 years and have two children. A lot of things happened to you because you followed your husband's suggestion. That being so, his idea was not sincere. You would not have been talking with him openly about another man if what you really wanted was an affair.
Love constantly changes because people constantly change.
While you both would probably greatly benefit from couples counseling, I'd recommend that you participate in ongoing therapy alone first, since you were the one who wrote to this online counselor. It's time to grow up, Doll. This question was answered by by Peg Burr . She perform psychodynamic psychotherapy with individual adult clients as well as couples, teens, and families. She also runs groups for adults and adolescents.