Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor. A dog's disposition stays the same all month long. Dogs never need to examine your relationship. A dog's parents never visit. Dogs love long car rides.
Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
Dogs know that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted. If a dog gets old and starts to snap at you constantly, you can put it out of its misery. Dogs like beer. Dogs don't hate their bodies. Dogs never buy Kenny G or Michael Bolton albums.