Second, we have to treat our children with respect. If we want them to trust their ability to make the right decisions on their own, we have to show them that we respect their ability to do so, and that means we must show them the same respect we expect them to show to us and others. Third, we must be consistent and follow through on our discipline tactics. If we're inconsistent, it sends mixed messages, making it nearly impossible for them to be consistent in the internal contemplation of their behavior. Fourth, we must model our own good behavioral choices.
Double standards create a confusion that makes clear internal dialogue impossible.
Fifth, we need to try to keep our cool. Yelling, screaming, or wigging out in any way brings to a screeching halt any attempts our children may have to internally reflect upon their poor choice. We become the bad guys-the target of their every thought, all of which are insulting, I assure you. Sixth, we need to make sure we address the behavior, not the child. Soon, he'll learn that every mistake he makes is a reflection of his self-worth.