Yes, I too am one of those messy women. I could care less if there's a pile of laundry on the floor, or a pan soaking in the sink. I come in the door, my shoes come off. I think there are three pair near the door as I write this. It drives him bonky, but I've got better things to do with my time and as such, just don't pay attention.
Girlfriend is probably similar.
You and your little woman need to come up with a reasonable method of doing things. As far as I can see, whoever is bugged by it should clean it. If you're annoyed with dishes in the sink, put 'em away yourself. If a ring in the toilet makes her booty itch, she cleans it. At least you're not eating your poop out of necessity - that would really be bad.