The tension builds. We are actors and audience, but we don't write the screenplay. And like the interactive movies people are experimenting with, sometimes it seems, we can make choices. You strike a balance, life becomes an artform, each choice you make is precious, every chance for creativity is an opportunity. And we struggle with the meaning of it all, to varying degrees.
Life is filled with contradictions.
In light moments, my brother introduces me as a Pioneer of New Forms of Social Behavior. A shared joke, a positive spin on the fact that sometimes it can be awkward to be around me. But it's also an endorsement, because it can be fun to be around me. It's a curse and a blessing to be so entertaining. It would get routine.