Yes means no. If you don't get sex whenever you want, your balls will shrivel. Enforce this rule at all times. If anyone asks, you have had sex in all possible positions and locations. If you don't have an orgasm, you won't get pregnant.
Life is one big competition.
If someone is better than you at anything, either pretend it's not true or kick their ass. If you are backed into a corner and must make a decision, stall. If you still must come up with an answer, leave yourself a loophole for escape. Every sentence that anyone says can be contorted to have sexual meaning. Make it a point to talk about this sexual meaning.