Explosions abound in the Mothers area of Table Talk .
This state of profound contradiction, loving me and hating me, is what will be for the rest of his life, if I am a good mother to him. This is the best that it can be. I know this, the taste of this awfulness, this bitterness, is in my mouth every day. Or her face will materialize for a flickering second in the silvered light of the mirror as you turn to leave the room. It's a hard job being a mother, and not everyone is up to it, even if they'd like to be.