Under these conditions, male children usually do well. They welcome a stepfather who is warm and involved, who refrains from exerting authority too quickly and who offers relief from the coercive cycle of interaction that occurred between mother and son. The mother's friction with the son also declines for the same reasons, greater economic security, another adult to share in household responsibilities, and an end to loneliness. Women who become stepparents are put in a particularly difficult role. Women are expected to aspire to have children, and all women know they are supposed to wish for children, but no woman dreams of becoming a stepmother.
Girls have an especially difficult time adjusting to a stepmother.
Girls can become entangled in loyalty conflicts between the two mother figures. Noncustodial mothers are more likely to maintain contact with children and frequent visits between mother and daughter are likely to cause increased conflict between stepmother and stepdaughter. In contrast, girls adapt less favorably when custodial mothers remarry. Stepfathers disrupt the close ties many girls establish with their mothers in a single parent family and girls can react to the new marriage with sulky, resistant behavior. Adolescents find it the most difficult to adjust to the blended family arrangement.