Revenge is never as sweet at the poets insist. When two people are locked in a struggle to keep the score even, their relationship is likely to be the first casualty but not the last. It is freeing to become aware that we do not have to be victims of our past and can learn new ways of responding. But there is a step beyond this recognition . . . It is the step of forgiveness.
Forgiveness is love practiced among people who love poorly.
It sets us free without wanting anything in return. We do not really know how to forgive until we know what it is to be forgiven. Therefore, we should be glad when we can be forgiven by our brothers. It is our forgiveness of one another that makes the love of Jesus manifest in our lives, for in forgiving we act towards one another as He acted toward us. Thomas Merton Forgiving is not condoning.