No citations in abstract . Use parallel construction. Personal biases, sarcasm, etc. , should not be evident in a formal report. All speculations should be clearly identified as such. Make sure all your assumptions are clearly stated.
Logic is unclear.
A bit more variety in wording would be welcomed by the reader. Organization is a problem for you. Please hand in a brief paragraph by paragraph outline with your submissions. Avoid categorical, unqualified statements which are either not documented or not attributed to experts in this area. Usually it is necessary to quote only when the particular wording is essential.