Dogs love it when your friends come over. A dog's time in the bathroom is limited to quick drinks. The later you come home, the more exited a dog is to see you. Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs. Dogs don't notice or care if you call them by another dog's name.
Dogs understand that farts are funny.
Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor. A dog's parents never visit. Dogs never need to examine the relationship. Dogs understand that instincts are better to follow than asking for directions. Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you've ever had.