Bubba and Joe-Bob parked their collective pickups in the Piggly Wiggly parking lot and made a ton of money selling firewood. Folks turned basements into bunkers and then greedily filled them with bottled water, dry goods, generators, pallets of toilet paper, and other stuff. They held hands, spoke in tongues, and cowered under mattresses reciting the 23 rd Psalm. After the clock stopped chiming, they were shocked to see that the power was still on and the toilets continued to flush. The bunkers once again became basements, folks calmly bought food for the bowl games, and Aunt Mildred continued to roll out her bodacious biscuits.
Life is good.