If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick its face and growl gently to show your concern. Because you are a dog you are expected to bark. Your owners will be happy to hear you protecting their house. Especially late at night while they are sleeping safely in their beds. There is no more secure feeling for a human than to keep waking up in the middle of the night and here your protective bark, bark, bark.
Humans prefer clean tongues.
Be ready to fetch your human a towel. If you arrange a little pile of dirt on one side of each hole maybe they'll think its gophers. Strive daily to do your part to help correct this problem. So take your time and get a comfortable as you can before taking your nap. Humans love to be sniffed.