You don't sweat, you percolate. You speed walk in your sleep. You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in. You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them. You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
Instant coffee takes too long.
Juan Valdez named his donkey after you. You channel surf faster without a remote. You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug. You short out motion detectors. You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.