We sometimes blame ourselves. These are all common reactions to traumatic stress. We hold ourselves and our partners together for so long that we put our own needs and emotions on hold. When our partner starts to feel better, it seems safer for us to begin to let out some of the feelings we have been supressing. Denying how you feel will not make the feelings go away.
Feelings are often an indicator that there is a problem.
Once you accept the way you feel, you can do something to deal with the underlying problem. If you are suffering from depression, get help. If you feel like talking to someone, call a friend, talk to your clergy person, or join a support group. Keep connected to others who are able to offer encouragement and support. Only you know your situation and the degree to which you can release control and begin to share day to day responsibilities with your spouse.