As they get older, the mother's control slips further and further. Children who are never expected to be responsible will almost certainly behave in particularly irresponsible ways during their preteen and teenage years. Parents who love but do not discipline also confuse their children when they provide them with what they want, not what they need. What children want and need are very different. Allowing children always to have what they want puts them in the position of parent.
Many adults express a longing for their father's love, approval, and affection.
Children often feel unsure of their father's love, as his most powerfully demonstrated emotions are frustration and anger, even rage. Children feel frightened. They may feel afraid to really try, afraid to fail. They fear authority and yet rebel against it, desperate to prove themselves, to find out who they really are. Boys grow up thinking that aggressive, even violent, behavior is acceptable.