Don't even think about saying it. Apologize whenever it's expected. If you hurt someone, pretend you care. Try to have a good memory, but it's OK if you forget trivial things. You know, like your girlfriend's b-day and eye color.
Ignorance solves problems.
It is never your duty to take responsibility for your actions. Create new words and phrases to describe genetalia, sex, semen, etc. This is the desired reaction. You are NOT a virgin. Males are born without virginity.