We can see the extreme of not separating tearing the church apart today over the homosexual issue. I have read where supposed theologians said that the Bible was not definite on this as being sin and the church must be inclusive. Hogwash, and I will go so far as to say that any that can accept this are not of the church, but children of hell itself. This by example is an issue that should not even be discussed in the church courts. Under such gross error a believer has no choice but separate themselves from the church were such is accepted practice .
Female elders is the next biggest issue separating the reformed church.
Again without the attempt to prove or disprove the issue, there has plenty been written by others, I simply offer the solution that is acceptable to me. Nonetheless there was a time when God chose a woman. Some maintain as punishment and shame to Israel rather than God's first choice. While indeed it may be a shame to the men that none of their rank was acceptable to be chosen, God did choose the woman. In the New Testament we see Paul speak of women and their service in the church.