While a particular exceptional event hasn't happened to you, don't resent the fact that it happens to other people. Death is magic. Life is magic. Everything in between is magic. And magic is always clear and plainspoken until the one who encounters it paints it a personal shade of feeling.
Life is a solitary journey.
Make yourself happy. Think about it. Yes, that really is the secret of life. That it is the ellipsis, the unwritten, the potential for anything. Just as it is the secret of death, and the secret for everything in between.