When a child enters the world it enters into a family that is already loaded with rules, and more rules are developed as the child grows to ensure the continuing function of the family system. Satir believes that the most important rules are the ones that govern communication between the members of the family. These rules are full of should and should not. These rules are set in place to help the child learn how to deal with anger and fear. However as a child grows some of these rules are no longer effective.
Healthy families have fewer rules and rules that are attainable, relevant, and flexible.
Families that allow members to be themselves and to lead a separate life as well as a shared life within the family, and where change is accepted and encouraged are the most functional families. On the other side where families are seen as closed, and change is not encouraged but something that is feared, and there is no individuality this represents a dysfunctional family system. In this type of family rules are rigid and they do not allow for members of the family to express feelings openly. The goals of HVPM are for the facilitation of the desired change in the family. For families to learn how to encourage change and to explore new options in how to handle stress and how to cope with problems as an individual and as a family.