We must learn which ceremonies may be breached occasionally at our convenience and which ones may never be if we are to live pleasantly with our fellow man. Everyone knows that a man can always marry even if he reaches 102, is penniless, and has all his faculties gone. There is always some woman willing to take a chance on him. Ceremony is-really a protection, too, in times of emotional involvement, particularly at death. If we have a social formula to guide us and do not have to extemporize, we feel better able to handle life.
Good manners have much to do with emotions.
To make them ring true, one must feel them, not merely exhibit them. The modern rule is that every woman must be her own chaperone. I try to find out what the most genteel people regularly do, what traditions they have discarded, what compromises they have made.