Talk with other staff members and get a sense of what they are feeling. Then you will be prepared with possible solutions when you meet with the individual. If you are purely rational you will miss the content, but if you avoid the rational you will get into an emotional slugfest. It's the interaction of the heart and mind that is important. There is no one perfect solution to any problem.
Emotional intelligence is a learned process rather than a preordained set of steps.
They are missing the boat in a changing world where technical skills are no longer sufficient for success. Make a conscious effort to stop and recognize the emotions you are feeling during times of stress. Challenge yourself to uncover the real causes of these emotions. Practice developing action plans that deal rationally with root causes. Make a habit of identifying possible emotions that motivate the actions of your law office staff.