Thoresen says forgiveness in no way condones or dismisses the act of a betrayer but rather IS a coping mechanism to stop the suffering from hurt or anger. Lawler is looking to the future of forgiveness research and is excited about its possibilities. That is the next step in our research. Allow yourself to feel the anger, pain or hurt over the event. Don't suppress the emotions or reaction to the offense.
Forgiveness is a choice, so make the choice.
This will allow you to let go of those negative feelings. Separate the two. Separate the person from what he or she has done. Forgiveness is not forgetting nor is it reconciliation. One is not condoning or excusing the offense.