This is a test to help you decide who is the real victim and who, merely the deceased. Victims feel pain. The other ones neither feel nor experience any pain or discomfort. The survivors have taken that on for them. You MUST choose it.
Life truly IS for the living.
You sense deep down it is not proper for you to let your spirit float in limbo. You will not want to communicate or talk to others. You believe that this activity takes you away from fulfilling your loyalty-imposed duty to keep the dead alive. Another excellent method for rapidly increasing your ability to cope with the seemingly unbearable loss of the life of a loved one, is to get a job on a switchboard or help-line like Suicide Hotline. This is something you might consider more as a secondary step, after you've integrated back into society.