Only then can the male begin to relearn how to be a feeling person. He will give himself the gift of a total experience with grief, emerging a more whole and healthy person. He will acknowledge his fears, his hopes, his dreams. William P. Macaux, M.S. Society's stereotype of the role of the bereaved male does little to foster a realistic understanding of his vulnerability to loss and his needs for emotional support. Therefore, men often do not learn to differentiate and name their feelings as women usually do.
Male strength is measured in terms of the ability to be independent and in control.
Seeking help is often considered a confession of weakness. To the extent that a man identifies with these characteristics, he is likely to have difficulty expressing the full range of his thoughts and feelings. As he is overtaken by the powerful and unexpected emotions of grief, he may feel frightened by his loss of control. He is likely to feel impotent as he sees his loved ones suffering with a problem he can't fix. As a consequence, bereaved fathers are frequently perceived as having lost less than bereaved mothers have.