French baseball chatter very disorienting. U.S. players get sleepy standing through two national anthems. Special enzyme in Canadian bacon that turns players into game-winning zombies. American teams discouraged by Clinton's new RBI tax. All our secret plays are being funneled to them by that weasel Paul Shaffer.
Exchange rate makes Canadian runs worth more.
They don't bother to use actual Canadians. Those damn mountie umpires. Team's idea of a double play - bourbon with a beer chaser. Home games played in parking lot of local bowling alley. Players refuse to slide for fear of ruining their manicure.