All are part of our aliveness and are pathways to ecstasy, creativity and empowerment. Through feminism I learned that the violence against women, children and the Earth are all connected to the world's patriarchal, male God religions that teach religious disrepect and hatred of life and of women. So I have focused my work on the spiritual empowerment of women. I have experienced women as powerful shapers of consciousness when our values are informed by our connection to the Earth, and when our sense of our own divinity is affirmed by one another in magical circles through ritual. In my personal journey, I have had to confront the realization that claiming ecstasy feels like a betrayal of my parents' limitations.
Ecstasy is beyond their experience.
The imprint of my mother's need to hide in order to survive and her survival fixation still influences me sometimes. In the course of my creative process, I sometimes get into surreal states of immobilization where I literally can't breathe and feel gripped in the back. I am breaking tradition. I am leaving behind my parents' misery. As I take my performance art into the greater world, I become scared that I will draw animosity to myself.